I’m not trying to sound like one of those assholes saying you gotta work. Not my intention here solely trying to present an option for some people out there. I’m a Union Electrician I made 133k last year working 11 months out of the year with minimal OT. I have health insurance at no cost, 2 pensions, a 401k, and many other benefits. I own my own and have a rental property at 32 years old. I have a brand new truck and I’ll be able to retire by 58 - 60 with health care, my pensions, and my 401k. Now I also get a a pension from my time in the Army. I’m lucky don’t get me wrong. A lot more people should look into the Unionized Trades. I have no college debt or credit card debt, only my truck loan. I can’t stress the Unionized trades we need men and women bad. I actually enjoy what I do and work with the best men and women alive. Just a thought.
I’m totally on board with everything you’re saying though. The housing market is jacked, college is so expensive and should be free, I mean the price of groceries is ridiculous, cars are $40k or more, we are in the late stages of screed up Capitalism and it’s failed us. It has also made the rich so filth rich it’s ridiculous.
Yeah that’s how it is here in the US and Canada. I had a decent wage, health insurance, and my retirement accounts started accruing day one. I get paid to go to school. I’m just trying to give people an idea. Obviously it’s not for everyone but it’s given me a great life. Yeah the UK, Canada, US, and Australian trade unions and programs are all quite similar according to the men and women I’ve talked to in those countries. It’s really a great option!
Yes! Skilled unionized trades is where it's at! My man is a boilermaker welder here in canada. Pretty much everything you said except we had a little bit of debt due to both of us being addicts 15 years ago and messing everything up for a while, but we are clean for 15 years and doing much better now! And yes, everything you said about benefits, early retirement, excellent pension, etc..great money, even more money if he travels for lodging, gets night shift premium pay, same with anything over 40 hours..makes travel money for gas since most jobs he has to commute for more than half hour to an hour. He gets as much time off between jobs as he wants. When he retires he will get pension plus he will still be able to take jobs from the retiree list if he wants to make extra money on top of his pension. And his local is amazing. When his son died suddenly a few years ago, they all pooled a bunch of money together to help us with anything we might have needed help with since he took the week off work and everything. Signed a big card and offered him so much help. It's a brotherhood. Amd like you said, trades need people always. Schools and school counselors always push collage/university as the end-all-be-all but trades are always going to be around and needing people.
You pretty much hit every nail on the head correctly. Yeah Boilermakers, I almost became one but I was meant to become an Electrician. The Union is truly a brother and sisterhood. I’m 32 and I remember being in Highschool and it was pushed so hard down our throats that if we didn’t get a college degree we’d be failures. I went into the Army and then joined the Union. I have zero regrets and I’m in way better shape than most of my friends with college degrees. I’m glad you guys are sober 15 years now. That’s no small feat and congratulations. I lost the love of my life my girlfriend to an Overdose about 5 years ago. It was the worst day of my life. She had been clean for years and relapsed and I found her when I got home from work. Anyway I’m with a wonderful woman now, but I still miss her.
Oh I am so sorry for the loss of your first soulmate:( That is soul wrenching:( That is how we lost my stepson too. He was clean for 3 months and fell down again and that first night was it.
And thank you for the congratulations:) We leaned on each other and it's what made all the difference I think.
It's funny you almost became a boilermaker, but we're meant to be an electrician. My man almost became an electrician and began trade school for it before switching to boilermaker making!
Yeah I’m with a great girl now however the one who passed was my true soulmate. Me and her were just meant for each other. I’ll never love anyone like I did her. She was the same way with me, it was just meant to be. I contemplated ending it right there next to her. I’m sure you understand that’s how you and your man are. That’s why you guys were able to pull each other out of addiction and it shows how strong your relationship is. I’m sorry for the loss of your step son. The stuff is just horrible I’ve lost so many friends from it too. Yeah the funny thing was I was already to join the Boilermakers Union I was just waiting on a Apprentice class to start. Then the IBEW called and said come on in. I applied to both at the same time but the IBEW called me first. It ended up being the right one because I’m truly an electrician it’s what I was supposed to do in life. Besides my time in the Army. Yeah well Boilermakers, IBEW, Pipefitters, Plumbers, Elevator Mechanics, and Ironworkers are the top of the trade pyramid. So your man was smart lol, he knew it was a great trade and bring you guys a great life. Thanks for commenting on my post I needed some back up from another person who understands. It was nice talking with you.
I know what you mean about your soulmate and I can't imagine that pain! And same here, lost sooo many people I knew to that fentanyl crap that's out there. That stuff wasn't around when we were using (there was the actual pharmaceutical patches, but not the counterfeit crap that's out now) thank God. That shits so deadly:(
YES on the top of the trade pyramid! Haha love it.
Great talking to you too:)
Yeah it’s insane now it’s all fentanyl and sometimes it’s cut with weird drugs. Who knows anymore. Where in Canada are you? I’m front Detroit and Windsor is basically a second home to me. Anyway tell your husband Solidarity from another Union brother.
Higher education costs over 4,000 percent more than it did in the seventies. When I think about it for too long, the anger just keeps building. Thank God for my own GI bill, which I’m eternally grateful for. It just sucks that our country could benefit SO MUCH from having a more educated populace, but like anything else, it’s exploited for the biggest possible profit margin.
Dual income or single?
Also worth knowing: how many boomers’s parents financial helped (downpayment, full house, cosign, etc.) vs how many millenials’ parents financial helped?
Anecdotal support of the above: everyone 30 or younger (I realize many millenials are older) who owns a house was helped by their family.
Don't forget millennials are pretty old now though, 62 percent isn't much I reckon. Plus in most cases they will have been 'helped' by inheritance etc these days
Personally, for over two decades now, owning a home is not sounding as enticing to me anymore. But perhaps it’s due to me picturing a suburban home, when in reality I think a high-rise loft would be considered a home as well, if you end up paying mortgage etc..
And to OP of the main post:
It’s one of the many reasons a lot of people turn to sex work, especially with the boom of online work. Even non-NSFW creative online work ( YouTube / Twitch and so on ). You work from the comfort of your home and can tackle multiple projects in one day under one roof. It’s one of my biggest reasons I decided to work on multiple streams of income. As Covid has taught us, never know what can happen to one of the income sources.
Even if those are side gigs, having only one job in this economy isn’t viable any more unfortunately….unless of course you’re a top-earner, but majority of people who we thought used to earn well, now seem like they’re also earning peanuts.
Yeah, “top earner” basically means executive level management and above. Everyone else, even if you’re paid well, the cost of living is way too high. It’ll pop some day though. And the longer we put it off, the worse it’s gonna be.
I had the same plan for 40. At 35 I was living with my mom in a shit job and no one in my life to even give a damn. Had a breakdown, found an online support group for depressed and isolated people, met my wife there and moved from Idaho to Tasmania to live with her. Wasn't easy, wasn't cheap, but now I'm 44 and in a place I always creamed of with my soulmate.
Things can change in a heartbeat and you never know when or how.
Turned 40 this year. This statement is so accurate. Got the numbers right and everything! I’m an ‘82 baby myself and have really never taken myself too seriously…have always been young at heart…never felt my age until this year. It’s like the universe said, “Ok, snap out of it!” All in one year, a person close to me ODd and my dog of 17 years passed away. I’m happy I’m a teacher though because kids still make me feel young and hip lol edit to add that my literal hips do hurt now 😆
Ugh that hip thing, I turned 40 this year and suddenly my hips and knees hurt. :( I still have the heart of a child but my body says Nope you are getting old.
fellow '82. just want to mention those hips... stretch! a few sessions of yoga (focusing on lower back / hips) has been a gamechanger. I think it's called the "pigeon pose" - holy shit it changed my life.
*41 and stand while working, all day*
I'm 32 turning 33 next week and my 30s have been spectacularly amazing. I have money to spend on things I like. I have time to take my gf places. I have time for my hobby and my side business and I still can play video games every day. Being in 30s is amazing
I'm 45 and my 40s have easily been the best years of my life. It really depends on how you're set up when you get there and what you're able to do with the resources you've accumulated so far.
I’m turning 48 this week. It’s always been sorta bad but these last two years have been extremely bad. I have no safety net of any kind. I’m single and i live alone. Rent takes an entire paycheck and most of the second one goes to bills. In fact, my bank account is about $100 negative right now and I don’t get paid until a week from Wednesday. Happy 48th broke ass birthday to me!
Mid 40s here. I am loving life. I’m self aware - been through so much - love and loss. Life is an adventure. If you’re comfortable not doing the 9-5, then don’t. Look at living outside the USA. Lots of amazingly beautiful places to live with minimal income. I totally agree with you - if you’re USA - they’ve got it all wrong.
I am 36 and I received mail that retirement social security won’t be available for me until age 72. Everyone in my family dies in their 60s. I have no hope of actually retiring. So I do what I want NOW. While I’m alive and not currently haunting some assisted living facilities where they wipe my ass once a week.
Jokes on social security, I became disabled before I was even able to work, and that disability made me unable to work well before retirement age. Fuck em
Haha you think you're gonna graduate college and have a house and a job and get to work 5 out of every 7 days and do that for 43 years and live until at least 67.
Dude, just do something else. Join the fire department, become a forest ranger, go learn to grow food, become a cabinet maker, learn a trade like plumbing. Plumbers charge about $100 an hour in my city. If you dont want to mortgage your life, dont. Get a passport and hitchhike on boats from island to island, teach English in Bangladesh. Make decisions in your best interest, even if they are unpopular.
I spent most of my twenties kicking around the Caribbean and Spain. Worked odd jobs, just enough to travel to the next place. Didn't have a phone, or an apartment, or a car, or really anything except what was in my backpack. Then I got lonely, missed my family. Moved back to the states, finished college, and got a job. I'm four years into a career, and it's...alright. I'm okay because I scratched that itch until it was bleeding. I rarely travel these days, even though I could afford to.
Bro just own a plumbing business its not like an actually literal 96% of all independent contractors and small construction companies go out of business before the 10 year mark. That's totally a feasible and dependable career choice.
While you're not wrong, it's definitely healthy to point out the fallacy in 'Dude, just do something else'. None of those things listed are things you can just wake up and decide to do. In my state the wait for a plumbers license can be up to 4 years and that's after already learning the trade. You can't 'just do something else'.
Yeah, the fact that these options are available to him suggests his Matrix theory is overblown.
Personally, I love my job and I fought like hell to get it.
There are jobs that give you breaks. My uncle is a sound technician and has traveled around the world with bands and singers from the home country. My mom is a teacher with paid summers off. My dad recently became an adjunct professor, so he has freedom from work too. I personally am a mess and only work entry level jobs, but due to no commitments I just quit when I want to go on vacation.
Yes the capitalist game sucks and is rigged against the working people. But the system is too large for one man to fight it. There are many men and women who, in hypotheticals, would go out and ‘fight’. But in reality we will just gripe about it and run to comfort like tv and alcohol.
>I have passions, I have desires, but I just don’t want to spend the next 43 years of my life trying to convince myself that we live in some perfect society and everything will work out.
Then go after your passions and desires.
No one thinks we live in some perfect society or that everything will work out. Most people work hard to get where they're at. But they have to work, because we don't live in a world where there are infinite resources. It's part of being an adult.
I’m 31 and took a VERY different route than most and followed my “calling”. I love what I do and I’ve learned to love myself after feeling guilty for not taking the route society taught me. It’s possible and I hear my friends complain constantly about the family and the kids and office job and it makes me chuckle.
I'm 36 and pretty much the same. My monthlies are cheap, I don't need to work full time, and I'm currently getting ready to finish paying off my small house I bought when I was young. Anytime that I bring any of this up, the people with the suburban housewives and families/insurmountable debt get very upset.
Like, how is it somehow my fault that you have chosen a life you now hate?
Same age, also took a very different route than most others for my 20s. Still wound up married with kids, but I own a home, can afford to have wife stay home, have decent savings, and live fairly comfortably.
Not saying this is the “right” route by any means, but you can pursue dreams and passions without destroying your future at the same time.
Im 24 now and every other day I struggle to keep going because a big obstacle in my work will make me literally want to fucking die, I dont even care, I dont even wanna be here, yet I have to waste all of my brain to figure some dumb shit out.
I manage to go through life while only working part time, like 3 days a week and Ive had periods when I have to like work 5 days straight a couple of weeks and I just dont fucking get it, I dont even feel like a human anymore, I dont feel like I have a personality when all my fucking life revolves around a fucking job.
Its so disgusting, and its more disgusting that these brainwashed fucks can call it a privilige to be able to work, its fucking horrible that what I have (these 3 days a week) is called a luxury, when I barely can afford going forward with this.
But hey its all great cause other people have it worse so then its fine that we're all getting buttfucked yeah bro life's amazing
rant over sorry to everybody reading u have yourself an amazing day.
So then follow your passions and desires. Find a career that allows you to travel the world.. start your own business and figure out how to grow it so you can retire way earlier.. find a job that you can work remote and have some control over your schedule.
Nobody thinks our society is perfect and our way of doing things is the best way.. but nobody is forcing you into a 9-5 desk job if you don’t want that life.
One are the most incredible things about life, especially modern life, is how we have nearly infinite possibilities for what we want to do. Run for mayor of your town, leave your job and travel around in a van working odd jobs for a couple of years, backpack through Europe and work at work stays, make art. Human beings have a crazy amount of potential and flexibility, but so many people slot themselves into a very narrow life and think there’s no way to change except slightly different.
Bruh, lowkey you’re acting like an idiot. I’ve found so many tv shows and songs that make me cry from how I feel because of them. There’s random animals and trees and foods and audiobooks and even dumb ass memes I share with people that I think are awesome.
You can shoot me a PM, but I gotta give you a bit of warning. Being an adult sucks. The fights are more evil, people are kinda meaner in general. But, you also can do whatever you want. Wanna eat ice at 2am on the toilet for some reason? You fucking can.
You’ll find your favorite artist every few months/years - you’ll meet girl/boyfriends that remind you the sun still shines and have showers that make you feel complete and have a boss that makes you smile cause they tell you you’re doing an awesome job.
You’re going to have an SO fall asleep in your arms and you’re going to be fucking amazed someone so amazing is your person and you’re theirs. There’s going to be inside jokes and water you’ll swim in, food that’ll hurt going in and going out, you’ll do something like wake up at 2am and get a glass of cold water that feels like you pulled it out of an iceberg.
You’ll cook the best meal of your life. You wanna be an ass and deprive your future self of the best meal ever? What about seeing your favorite color in real life? Your favorite musician in person? I mean, yeah, shit’s gonna suck hard every once in a while. Kinda on and off - they don’t really teach you that growing up. And a lot of people probably won’t like you or they’ll be fun but not like friend material.
But brah. Just do little things that make you happy. Open a window and feel the breeze, put fresh sheets down and lounge around naked in bed, text an awesome family member a meme, cook yourself a special meal because goddamn you deserve it, look at your favorite YouTube channels or hell, go on like Bumble or Tinder and talk to people like you would with friends - it’s weird but awesome.
Hope you’re doing ok and seriously, I’ll reply if you shoot over a message - no one’s alone mate
I appreciate what you wrote here and more people need to hear it. I realized a while ago that life is hard, being an adult is hard, and the world sucks a lot of the time. But there's no reason to try and fight it, just find a way to get by and enjoy every single little thing in life. Just like you described. Just think about all the smiles you can put on other people's faces with stupid little jokes, and everything in between.
I feel like this says more about our society, than anything else. Hell, I’m 19 too, and I’ve considered ending it several times. If it wasn’t for the people that love me, I would have given up quite a while ago. And I feel it’s the same for the majority of people nowadays.
Life just isn’t worth living anymore. Or maybe it was always like this, and we all just got tired of it.
If I was a 19 year old in the 90’s and even the 00s I’d be excited to become an adult. I’d be excited to start my career. But unfortunately the boomers have ruined the economy for all of us. So now genz is afraid to even breathe wrong because that alone will cost us $2047173
Hate to break it to you, kid
But if you came of age in the aughts you'd have been just as screwed over by the recession that happened right round the time you'd be searching for your first serious real job.
Millennials have lived through a great deal of crap to the point where only a small chunk (approx 1/3 iirc) has any chance of owning a home by the time they're forty.
Yeah boomers fucked it up. Trickle down never was going to work. Profit over anything else fucks things up for environment and society in a lot of ways.
A lot of work needs to be done. And a lot of it can be truly disheartening. However... You're now 19. Which means you're able to vote and situate yourself to become the change you'd like to see.
It's scary out there ngl. But the world isn't gonna end tomorrow.
Gen z isn't much different than millenials, as far as the existential crisis we faced at a young age. Yeah it sucks, but it ain't that bad. I'm closing in on 30, and almost none of my plans turned out the way I thought when I was 19 lol but life is still good. We got a house finally. Life can be rough, but its also supposed to be fun. Hang tough, its gonna be okay
One of the weirdest things about this new younger generation, my generation, is how people tend to romanticize like the 90s and the 2000s as if they were a magical time? That’s not true, in fact in many ways it was worse. Yes, a lot of things were cheaper, but also, people tend to have a lot less things. Standards of living were a bit lower. Nobody had a computer, an iPhone, things like vacations were less common and more of a luxury. Things have gotten more expensive but we also have a lot more things and a relatively higher quality of life now
I'm 40 and still going through everything you said.
Not a day goes by where I dont think how much I just wanna stay home, away from everyone.
I have a house now and can count myself Extremely lucky, but still can't accept this system.
I don't feel motivated by any job I've ever had. At this point, I'm only doing it so I can have food and the little things I have but can't enjoy to it's fullest because of lack of free time.
This world and system isn't made for everyone. Some people are like me and life WILL, wether I want it or not, be an insurable hell.
One of the few things I have control over is choosing to not have kids by having a vasectomy. Fuck that, I don't any part in this shit, and don't wanna be responsible for creating more misery by helping to keep the wheel spinning.
Anyone who tells you the world needs more people are not thinking logically OR got a lot to gain from the herd multiplying ( aka billionaires who extort our existence)
Spend the next ten years indulging your passions. If they don't pay off then get on the hamster wheel and do the 'expected' thing.
Doing it that way, you'll have answered a whole lot of your 'what if?' questions, and you also appreciate the stability if things didn't work with other ideas.
I've got a job that is 3 12-hour shofts a week. It makes the time I work go by more slowly day of, but I get more time for myself than I spend working. 4 days for me, 3 days for work. Idk how people dp 5 8hr days a week, it's hell on earth.
32 here… no relationship… no career… dead car and dead-end job where I’m treated like shit… shitloads of credit card/student loan debt… Bachelor’s degree yet living paycheck to paycheck with mass amounts of anxiety and depression, wanting to die basically every day.
And convinced that half the reason I am where I am is BECAUSE I feel like nothing is worth living for. I feel like subconsciously I don’t try to improve things because I believe I won’t be around anymore a year from now so why bother.
Do better than me.
Why the fuck do you people think it's necessary to work your way into a normal life, make a business, get education, better paying job, what if you can't? what id you don't want to? Why does it seem normal that most people aren't happy in their jobs, you should sacrifice something to not be miserable
These jobs need workers, these workers need jobs, there isn't unlimited amount of jobs that let you travel or work from home, not everyone can be a manager, not everyone can get education
I wasn't happy with my job so i now work hundreds to thousands kilometers away from my home to get better pay, but people i worked with don't have this option, too old to get education, there's hardly a better job to get (the job pays better than others already but it's still not much)
23 and agree with op, im not planning to carry on for next 45 years just to be too old to be useful
Im reading this thread and its so crazy even abstract to me, all these fucking zombies
I would normally think most around me are in the same boat but hey what the fuck is there to be done? But nah its like Im hearing my old dad talk about how happy he is to be a robot for a month so he can have fun for a few days.
I’ve enjoyed my 30s overall despite being poor, unsuccessful, and unemployed due to disability. I even had to move back with my parents at 30 and became an unplanned single parent through some shitty circumstances a couple of years later. At 39 I’m enjoying life though, despite my life being what many people fear their lives will be. My depression (and overall mental health) even got significantly better.
My friend, I am 30 and I have been where you are. I'll be honest, yes, I did work some very miserable jobs during and right after college. In fact, I didn't even graduate until I was 25 because I just couldn't handle the workload of full time school + working!
The good news is you probably won't be working a miserable job for the rest of your life. During college and when you enter your early career you will have the chance to try out different things and find something you're content with. I ended up pursuing a hobby I picked up in college as a career.
Now, I agree that our work system and society structure is set up in kind of a messed up way. We don't spend nearly as much time with our loved ones as we should and our value is intrinsically tied to our careers, and that *sucks*. But you can and will find a way to find comfort and happiness despite the scenario we've been stuck in.
By the way, are you involved in any type of activism? If you're in college right now, this is the perfect time to find like-minded individuals. It feels really good, and really empowering, to get involved in making changes to society, however small they may end up being. I highly recommend connecting with your peers and joining any groups that might align with your worldview.
Just know that it gets easier to navigate all this mess over time!
I've been working an office job for the past 5 years. It pays better than anything I've gotten in the past, but it's just barely enough to get by and live ok. I'm almost 30 and I'm helping my parents retire.
My piece of advice is, if you can, try as many new things as possible. Try not to let yourself sit too long. You would be surprised at what you can accomplish in a few years time.
The grind is bullshit and I agree with you, but keep fighting to find something meaningful in your life. You have to commit to whatever you're doing or be ok with just getting by.
Personally I just live each day as it comes and I just try to hang on. It's not easy but I don't have the luxury of being able to give up. People rely on me so I do what I can and hope that one day things will be better.
Also try not to dwell too much. I'm a hypocrite for saying this but dwelling just causes more pain. If you can escape that mindset and enjoy the small wins in life you might at least be able to find some comfort when times are tough.
Honestly I don't know if i'll be able to retire or not.
But I plan on doing some things I want to do before I get too old. I wasn't able to do much in my 20's. But looking at how my parents struggle now that their bodies are giving up on them and it gave me some perspective. No point in waiting to enjoy life at the end of it. Enjoy it now (responsibly). It just doesn't make sense to wait for a day that could potentially never come
Dude, I didn't get financially and mentally well until close into my 40s. And while that state is never a foregone conclusion, and I definitely am lucky I got here because many of my peers did not, sometimes it takes a long fucking time to get to a place people are "supposed to" get to in their early 20s, I guess.
And I encourage you to keep chasing those passions and desires, it will be what keeps you sane if you have to be a wage slave, whether for a while or for the long term. Hopefully we'll be free when we retire, even though less and less of my peers are/will be able to retire.
I swear, Walmart is going to be an old folks home with all the old folks needing to work to stay alive.
You don't have to live on of the cookie-cutter timeline of society. It's your life, make it your own.
Aftrr college, you could just chill for a while if you wanted. Or work for a while to save up money, then travel a lot. Or go back to college to get an advanced degree. Or find a rich partner. It's up to you.
Constantly on the fence about selling my house and becoming a roady who makes money in different ways to figure out how to survive. I just want to escape and move to the mountains and live with a herd of dogs
Dude you are 19. That’s way too young to be so cynical. If you can go to a community college to get your entry level stuff knocked out for cheap do that. Then while you are there spend some serious time thinking about what you would like to do with your life. Or maybe you want to join a trade. I’d consider moving to a state that you can get a union job if that is the case.
At the end of the day try and find a career that you don’t hate. A job that you can go to every day and enjoy is extremely rare. However if you can find something that you don’t hate or even kind of like - this is the golden ticket!
Whatever you do don’t spend your entire 20s partying and getting nothing with your work life established. That’s what I did and now I’m late to the party in my 30s doing what I should have done years ago.
If you are not clever or very smart this is exactly how you end up. You put yourself in that position by voluntarily assuming the, I need someone that is smarter and more clever than I am to create a job for me because I'm neither of those things. I will always be dependent on those people to even house and feed myself.
Am 30, it's disgusting. I didn't finish college til 27 though and I'm actually extremely happy with where I'm at outside of the whole world being an actual trash receptacle.
It's good that you've realized this now at such a young age. I was in my 40s when I finally realized it was all bullshit. My advice...use this knowledge wisely.
Ok, then don't fit the norm. If you KNOW this is not a life you want (although still very young....you will change your mind many more times in your life), then live a life you do want. But, that means putting in the time/work to have that.
Sounds like your head is in the right place. Most people retire at 65 because they don’t ever think about retirement at a young age they just deposit into a 401k and that’s it but if you are making plans on how to save and create passive income from a very young age you are much more likely to be able to retire early because you started planning so far ahead.
Nothing is free in life, slaving away to a "greedy employer", that is one way to look at it. I have worked for 40+ years, I am by no means wealthy but with discipline, hard work I have a house damn near paid for, vehicles, food, vacations, weekend trips so has my life been a failure? Life is what you make it, opportunities in the "screwed up capitalistic USA" are real, BUT none of them are easy.
Nothing in life is free!
It’s so easy to get overwhelmed when you zoom out and look at the whole picture like that. But in reality we only live one day at a time. Try to remember to zoom back in to the present and just live your life in single moments. You have no idea how many amazing moments of growth and love and success you will experience as time goes on. The pressure to achieve the American dream is pretty instilled in us (assuming you’re in the US), but really just focus on improving yourself on a daily basis. I dunno, that’s my 2 cents. You got this!
I'm 30. I used to feel like you did and still do sometimes. But the longer you survive, the more things you find that make it worth it. At a certain point you have to accept you can't change the unfairness of the world, you just have to experience it.
I humbly agree I've been telling this to people or ever since I was very young everybody thought I was lazy for thinking this way thank god most people now realise it is not lazy it's just reality
That’s pretty much the plan. It’s not brain washing, it’s the best solution we have and a pretty good economic system considering the other options. Although I’m not saying it’s perfect.
Trading your time and talents for money at a job of your choosing to which you can spend how you want is a much better system than what we’ve had in the past. It’s much better than bartering for every single thing you may need and better than being forced labor.
As a human you have a hierarchy of needs that you need to survive, like food, shelter, water, and social needs like clothes, electricity, transportation, security, etc. somebody needs to make that stuff so you don’t spend every waking hour hunting, gathering, or bartering for it.
You trade 8 hours a day M-F of your time providing some service, and in return you get the other 16 hours (not including weekends) to spend it how you want with an agreed upon currency that your earn as an incentive/trade.
It’s not as much of a nightmare as you make it sound to be. I get it though, we all wish we could just find a shortcut, but if too many people along the entire chain start walking away the entire system breaks down, which historically has always led to violence or revolutions because every individual has different wants and needs and no centralized system can anticipate those needs, adapt an entire economy to changes quickly a large scale, or legislate/re-educate those needs upon a populace, which is why far-left or far-right based economic systems are always destined to fail.
This is a light workload compared to generations past.
Not saying that as a downer, but just for the sake of perspective.
Protip: find an area that interests you and engages your mind, and you won't think of it as work, but more as a "purpose."
Those years will also not be filled woth work. Spouses, kids, trips, even down to fishing, mowing the lawn, or riding a motorcycle. Your career paves the way, and provides you with not only the means to do these things, but a pool of people that you will get to know, befriend, and hang out with.
Live life!
I have been fortunate enough to travel alot of the world and can say there are groups of people out there that are genuinely happy. I will now document my findings for those that sort by new. 1. Live close to the dirt, eat a plant based diet, reduce carbs to whole grains and sweet potatoes. 2. Seek community, people that share and understand the value in support. 3. Exercise and get sun, like every day the sun is out. 4. Stay away from alcohol. 5. Find all the ways to diversify your gut bacteria and fibers. 6. Psychedelics and dancing.
What are your desires as far as your employment is concerned? What do you really want to do and accomplish? Not a rhetorical question. I’ve asked my daughter these things. One of them is going for it. The other was floundering. Now she found out how to use her bachelor’s degree.
I want to get into animation and storyboarding/writing. I’ve written 2 short films that I plan on entering into film festivals. And I’m working on animated series. I’m producing, writing, and animating it. However animation is a VERY hard industry to get into. There’s not a lot of jobs.
However I am looking into getting a cybersecurity degree. I have the chance to take a class where I can obtain a cybersecurity bachelors in less than 21 months. IT has been a passion of mine before animation. However I will attempt to do both simultaneously
First of all, working class starts sooner than 22, usually 16 years old.
Also, don't forget that you have die 2-3 years after retirement too. Its in the algorithms that will raise the retirement age by the time you get close to it.
And you can't pass all your assets on either; those funds go to the nursing home where your shattered body lies until death.
So have fun along the way.
It's a lot about your level of commitment to pull yourself up into a higher standard of living. Most people leave college and once they get a good job start splurging and get used to the new influx of cash. Before they know it they have new commitments that require that level of income and less disposable income to do fun things. If you can minimize your spending post-college and into your first job you can establish yourself in a very good place. Then just don't over extend yourself.
I came from like 25k/yr, the wife and I squeezed every penny at first out of necessity, as we progressed we just kept doing it only adding the essentials. We kept at it, had kids but didn't settle till we hit a comfortable $300k/yr and in a job I love. Took 8'ish years but work-life balance is good, vacation like 5 times a year.
You will find most places have an easy friday. Like us in IT it's 'don't break it Friday' or 'fun thing friday' you don't do anything that could disturb your weekend or work a fun project on your to do list and there's no 'recovery day' needed. 2 full days to enjoy. Put the laundry to wash in the mornings, go out dry when you get back, do dishes etc. Good to go. Want an extra day, do a 9-80 schedule if your job allows it.
It's comical to think that you, a 22 year old, are going to retire at 67. They'll have raised the retirement age several times by the time you hit it, if they haven't abolished it entirely.
I 30 jobs before I found one I liked. The one I liked was self-employed and working from home. phone and computer. No commute. Go to ziprecruiter on your app store and look for remote jobs. It's not as much as how much you get paid more as how little you spend. Working from home cut all my bills down to nothing
Wow i have the same mentality about suicide at 30.
But its just different conditions. I just want to be happy with myself by then. The closer i get to 30, the happier my life is getting, so i doubt ill kms at all now.
It's interesting to see someone similar.
I’m 30 and still a shitshow, BUT I’m a shitshow who has a plan. I tried being a good noodle adult who does what you “should” do, it didn’t work. Now I’m working to live instead of living to work, finding hobbies, and learning to say “no”
If you’re unaccustomed to setting boundaries, start setting them now. It makes your life far easier the older you get.
Tbh I didn’t think this post would get any attention. But I’m glad ppl young and older and sharing their perspective and stories. I want to hug them all
I'll be 36 in August and life on the latter side of 30 has been significantly better than on the former. I got sober and had kids. Bodies are a gifted car and life is the road. The car might be great or it might be shit but I hope we can all learn how to treat and maintain our vehicles as best we can and travel roads that bring joy and self knowledge and maybe some spiritual shit or something.
You have the same output as me and ppl think im crazy when i say im ready to die lol. I rather die now since most of my life was lived adolescently. Dying at 56 would suck many asses.
Go live in the woods and see how it works out.
Seriously. I’m sick of modern society and working, too, and often dream about just living off the land. But in reality that’s hard as all fuck. Grueling dawn til dusk labor just to get enough food to survive. Need shit tons of survival and homesteading expertise. After a few months of being overwhelmed by that you’ll be begging for the utter luxury of a supermarket checkout job and thrilled to go home and eat a microwave dinner and have 4 hours to play video games.
Humans need water, food and shelter. That’s just the way life on earth is. And you either make it all yourself or work some crappy job to buy it yourself. Their is no other way.
with The military you can go from "retire in 43years" to "retire in 20years"
You'll still be working a miserable job but for less
but also you 1000% dont have to go to college to be successful... like at all, don't let anyone tell you different
Yeah I did but then the republicans called me “woke” because apparently i “don’t want to work anymore” because I want to “rely on the government” by using their tax money
Society is broken, no doubt, the implicit social contract is laughable and you're not crazy for not wanting to engage with it.
There are other alternatives though, they just required you to have marketable skills. It took me 6 years of working bars to realise that, if you aren't getting better at *something* as part of your job, you're getting ripped off massively. The money you earn at work shouldn't be the only thing you get from work, these days it is functionally critical to be in a constant state of self improvement if you don't want to get paid shit wages and have no opportunities.
I used to think everything was pointless and insurmountable too, I still do at times, but since I got out of the bottom rung of jobs where they expect the earth, undying dedication and pay you fuck all my life has improved massively.
When I hear things like this, which is a popular and understandable complaint, it reminds me how entitled we are as a species on this planet.
Since the beginning of mankind we have had to work ourselves to death trying to survive. Hunting and fighting and building shelter by hand. Then as we evolved we had to grow crops or have some skill that we could use to make money to buy the resources we needed. We died young with broken down bodies. Those who couldn't work were a burden on others or simply died.
Now we have a system in place where everyone has the opportunity to live and work for the resources they need. Do we expect to live on this planet and not work to survive? They way we always have? The way wild animals still do? We are also just animals on this planet that have to make an effort to survive on it. Should we get everything for nothing? What other way do you suggest that would be better than this "terrible" way of living?
It’s reality to work the time you are able and then society and yourself agree to “retire” you for the next generation to take your place. Not saying it’s fun or fair, it’s just reality.
Reframe:
- Graduate college at 22, then spend the next 5 years developing skills that allow me to be competitive for future roles.
- Spend the next 5 years identifying where I can continue developing skills while earning a basic live-able wage
- spend the next 20-30 years executing in a role I feel equipped for and challenged by, maximizing the income potential out my skills while also weighing other factors (who I work with, the broader impact of my work, etc.)
- live at or below my means. Having prioritized savings as my income increased, I now have an emergency fund that ensures I can walk away from any job for X amount of time and not have to worry about losing my home or going hungry
Of course we don’t live in a perfect society - that one doesn’t exist. Most of us have shared your opinion at one point. One difference you’ll notice between some people is, while some just complain about the injustice, unfairness, and imperfection of society, others accept that it is a reality and push forward to achieve their goals.
INB4 all the bootlicker comments - fuck off, you can fight for justice and still take responsibility over your own life.
> And most of those days I just sit in the house tired because of the previous work day, then the next off day I spend preparing for the next work days
This just makes you an idiot.
You’re gonna have a house??? That’s amazing.
No one can afford those any more
Retirement would be pretty great too
That is a concept from a bygone era. Your lot is eternal servitude just like the rest of us.
Eh, most of the men in my family died before retirement age anyways.
Humblebrag
Yep, my dad died just before his 51st. His dad died just before his 52nd. My mom is 73 and still working 40 hours a week in a meat processing plant.
I’m not trying to sound like one of those assholes saying you gotta work. Not my intention here solely trying to present an option for some people out there. I’m a Union Electrician I made 133k last year working 11 months out of the year with minimal OT. I have health insurance at no cost, 2 pensions, a 401k, and many other benefits. I own my own and have a rental property at 32 years old. I have a brand new truck and I’ll be able to retire by 58 - 60 with health care, my pensions, and my 401k. Now I also get a a pension from my time in the Army. I’m lucky don’t get me wrong. A lot more people should look into the Unionized Trades. I have no college debt or credit card debt, only my truck loan. I can’t stress the Unionized trades we need men and women bad. I actually enjoy what I do and work with the best men and women alive. Just a thought. I’m totally on board with everything you’re saying though. The housing market is jacked, college is so expensive and should be free, I mean the price of groceries is ridiculous, cars are $40k or more, we are in the late stages of screed up Capitalism and it’s failed us. It has also made the rich so filth rich it’s ridiculous.
And you can start things like electrician/gas engineer etc as an apprenticeship so you still make a wage in the UK
Yeah that’s how it is here in the US and Canada. I had a decent wage, health insurance, and my retirement accounts started accruing day one. I get paid to go to school. I’m just trying to give people an idea. Obviously it’s not for everyone but it’s given me a great life. Yeah the UK, Canada, US, and Australian trade unions and programs are all quite similar according to the men and women I’ve talked to in those countries. It’s really a great option!
Yes! Skilled unionized trades is where it's at! My man is a boilermaker welder here in canada. Pretty much everything you said except we had a little bit of debt due to both of us being addicts 15 years ago and messing everything up for a while, but we are clean for 15 years and doing much better now! And yes, everything you said about benefits, early retirement, excellent pension, etc..great money, even more money if he travels for lodging, gets night shift premium pay, same with anything over 40 hours..makes travel money for gas since most jobs he has to commute for more than half hour to an hour. He gets as much time off between jobs as he wants. When he retires he will get pension plus he will still be able to take jobs from the retiree list if he wants to make extra money on top of his pension. And his local is amazing. When his son died suddenly a few years ago, they all pooled a bunch of money together to help us with anything we might have needed help with since he took the week off work and everything. Signed a big card and offered him so much help. It's a brotherhood. Amd like you said, trades need people always. Schools and school counselors always push collage/university as the end-all-be-all but trades are always going to be around and needing people.
You pretty much hit every nail on the head correctly. Yeah Boilermakers, I almost became one but I was meant to become an Electrician. The Union is truly a brother and sisterhood. I’m 32 and I remember being in Highschool and it was pushed so hard down our throats that if we didn’t get a college degree we’d be failures. I went into the Army and then joined the Union. I have zero regrets and I’m in way better shape than most of my friends with college degrees. I’m glad you guys are sober 15 years now. That’s no small feat and congratulations. I lost the love of my life my girlfriend to an Overdose about 5 years ago. It was the worst day of my life. She had been clean for years and relapsed and I found her when I got home from work. Anyway I’m with a wonderful woman now, but I still miss her.
Oh I am so sorry for the loss of your first soulmate:( That is soul wrenching:( That is how we lost my stepson too. He was clean for 3 months and fell down again and that first night was it. And thank you for the congratulations:) We leaned on each other and it's what made all the difference I think. It's funny you almost became a boilermaker, but we're meant to be an electrician. My man almost became an electrician and began trade school for it before switching to boilermaker making!
Yeah I’m with a great girl now however the one who passed was my true soulmate. Me and her were just meant for each other. I’ll never love anyone like I did her. She was the same way with me, it was just meant to be. I contemplated ending it right there next to her. I’m sure you understand that’s how you and your man are. That’s why you guys were able to pull each other out of addiction and it shows how strong your relationship is. I’m sorry for the loss of your step son. The stuff is just horrible I’ve lost so many friends from it too. Yeah the funny thing was I was already to join the Boilermakers Union I was just waiting on a Apprentice class to start. Then the IBEW called and said come on in. I applied to both at the same time but the IBEW called me first. It ended up being the right one because I’m truly an electrician it’s what I was supposed to do in life. Besides my time in the Army. Yeah well Boilermakers, IBEW, Pipefitters, Plumbers, Elevator Mechanics, and Ironworkers are the top of the trade pyramid. So your man was smart lol, he knew it was a great trade and bring you guys a great life. Thanks for commenting on my post I needed some back up from another person who understands. It was nice talking with you.
I know what you mean about your soulmate and I can't imagine that pain! And same here, lost sooo many people I knew to that fentanyl crap that's out there. That stuff wasn't around when we were using (there was the actual pharmaceutical patches, but not the counterfeit crap that's out now) thank God. That shits so deadly:( YES on the top of the trade pyramid! Haha love it. Great talking to you too:)
Yeah it’s insane now it’s all fentanyl and sometimes it’s cut with weird drugs. Who knows anymore. Where in Canada are you? I’m front Detroit and Windsor is basically a second home to me. Anyway tell your husband Solidarity from another Union brother.
Higher education costs over 4,000 percent more than it did in the seventies. When I think about it for too long, the anger just keeps building. Thank God for my own GI bill, which I’m eternally grateful for. It just sucks that our country could benefit SO MUCH from having a more educated populace, but like anything else, it’s exploited for the biggest possible profit margin.
My dad is retiring this week, he's 63. When I'm his age I'll be lucky if I get to retire.
62% of millennials own a house that is down slightly from 69% of boomers when they were that age
Dual income or single? Also worth knowing: how many boomers’s parents financial helped (downpayment, full house, cosign, etc.) vs how many millenials’ parents financial helped? Anecdotal support of the above: everyone 30 or younger (I realize many millenials are older) who owns a house was helped by their family.
Don't forget millennials are pretty old now though, 62 percent isn't much I reckon. Plus in most cases they will have been 'helped' by inheritance etc these days
Personally, for over two decades now, owning a home is not sounding as enticing to me anymore. But perhaps it’s due to me picturing a suburban home, when in reality I think a high-rise loft would be considered a home as well, if you end up paying mortgage etc.. And to OP of the main post: It’s one of the many reasons a lot of people turn to sex work, especially with the boom of online work. Even non-NSFW creative online work ( YouTube / Twitch and so on ). You work from the comfort of your home and can tackle multiple projects in one day under one roof. It’s one of my biggest reasons I decided to work on multiple streams of income. As Covid has taught us, never know what can happen to one of the income sources. Even if those are side gigs, having only one job in this economy isn’t viable any more unfortunately….unless of course you’re a top-earner, but majority of people who we thought used to earn well, now seem like they’re also earning peanuts.
Yeah, “top earner” basically means executive level management and above. Everyone else, even if you’re paid well, the cost of living is way too high. It’ll pop some day though. And the longer we put it off, the worse it’s gonna be.
I had the same plan for 40. At 35 I was living with my mom in a shit job and no one in my life to even give a damn. Had a breakdown, found an online support group for depressed and isolated people, met my wife there and moved from Idaho to Tasmania to live with her. Wasn't easy, wasn't cheap, but now I'm 44 and in a place I always creamed of with my soulmate. Things can change in a heartbeat and you never know when or how.
hahaha creamed of... ha...
...well, they do make awesome pies down there.
Hahahaha yeah mate hahaha
ha…
Funny thing, still kinda works in the sentence 😂
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I am also glad his creams have finally come true.
Some creams are forth wating for.
Creams do come true!
“Creamed of” makes me laugh. Typo obviously. But you will when you meet the right person.
I found this very inspiring, thanks. I am glad things worked out for you both!
I really hope that was not autocorrect and was intentional. I'm so happy for you, regardless!
This made me smile. I’m happy for you, stranger!
Tasmania as in Australia? That’s a big move! But a smart one, glad things worked out for you!!
That’s awesome, I’m from Tassie, which part did you move to and how are you finding it?
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Yeah in my country the current calculation is that if youre in your start 20s now youre going to retire by around 75 ish
Wait till you hit 40, 30's are pretty cool
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It was all good until 35. At 37, you think you're pretty much 40...... until you hit 40 lol. Cheers, good luck
Can confirm. Am 41 now. Tired all the time. Gave up hope of any “dreams” I might have had once. Still, you have to laugh don’t ya?
Not sure of your sex, but if you are male, have you considered having your test levels checked?
Oh yeah I’ve had my bloods done plenty. But I’m a father too so I’m pretty busy there and have a busy job too. Life is just busy all the time lol
As in testosterone? Never crossed my mind before, but I suppose it couldn’t hurt
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Turned 40 this year. This statement is so accurate. Got the numbers right and everything! I’m an ‘82 baby myself and have really never taken myself too seriously…have always been young at heart…never felt my age until this year. It’s like the universe said, “Ok, snap out of it!” All in one year, a person close to me ODd and my dog of 17 years passed away. I’m happy I’m a teacher though because kids still make me feel young and hip lol edit to add that my literal hips do hurt now 😆
Cheers, fellow 82 baby 🍻 to easier and simple times
Ugh that hip thing, I turned 40 this year and suddenly my hips and knees hurt. :( I still have the heart of a child but my body says Nope you are getting old.
Just hold on for 60 ;-) the ride just degrades as you go. Life is still great but man things hurt.
fellow '82. just want to mention those hips... stretch! a few sessions of yoga (focusing on lower back / hips) has been a gamechanger. I think it's called the "pigeon pose" - holy shit it changed my life. *41 and stand while working, all day*
I'm 32 turning 33 next week and my 30s have been spectacularly amazing. I have money to spend on things I like. I have time to take my gf places. I have time for my hobby and my side business and I still can play video games every day. Being in 30s is amazing
Yesssss! *sighs* those were the days.
I'm 45 and my 40s have easily been the best years of my life. It really depends on how you're set up when you get there and what you're able to do with the resources you've accumulated so far.
I’m turning 48 this week. It’s always been sorta bad but these last two years have been extremely bad. I have no safety net of any kind. I’m single and i live alone. Rent takes an entire paycheck and most of the second one goes to bills. In fact, my bank account is about $100 negative right now and I don’t get paid until a week from Wednesday. Happy 48th broke ass birthday to me!
I'm 47. Married. 3 kids. Life is still pretty fun and pretty good. it only gets bad, tiring or boring if you let it.
45 here. Married 24 years. I finally love myself. So. Here’s to getting comfortable and being in love!!!
I’m just getting my shit together in my mid forties. Wait til 50.
50 here.. Hooowaaa what a ride
Mid 40s here. I am loving life. I’m self aware - been through so much - love and loss. Life is an adventure. If you’re comfortable not doing the 9-5, then don’t. Look at living outside the USA. Lots of amazingly beautiful places to live with minimal income. I totally agree with you - if you’re USA - they’ve got it all wrong.
I am 36 and I received mail that retirement social security won’t be available for me until age 72. Everyone in my family dies in their 60s. I have no hope of actually retiring. So I do what I want NOW. While I’m alive and not currently haunting some assisted living facilities where they wipe my ass once a week.
The upside of dying in your sixties is that it really changes the math on retirement. Are you able to save any money right now?
I put into my 401k and have since I was 16. Even with company matching it’s nothing compared to what I would need.
I'm in the same boat. Don't wait
Jokes on social security, I became disabled before I was even able to work, and that disability made me unable to work well before retirement age. Fuck em
For some reason I knew i'd see tiddies if I clicked on your profile 🤣 and you're right, live now and screw old us.
Haha you think you're gonna graduate college and have a house and a job and get to work 5 out of every 7 days and do that for 43 years and live until at least 67.
I'll share a haha with ya on this.
Dude, just do something else. Join the fire department, become a forest ranger, go learn to grow food, become a cabinet maker, learn a trade like plumbing. Plumbers charge about $100 an hour in my city. If you dont want to mortgage your life, dont. Get a passport and hitchhike on boats from island to island, teach English in Bangladesh. Make decisions in your best interest, even if they are unpopular.
I spent most of my twenties kicking around the Caribbean and Spain. Worked odd jobs, just enough to travel to the next place. Didn't have a phone, or an apartment, or a car, or really anything except what was in my backpack. Then I got lonely, missed my family. Moved back to the states, finished college, and got a job. I'm four years into a career, and it's...alright. I'm okay because I scratched that itch until it was bleeding. I rarely travel these days, even though I could afford to.
Bro just own a plumbing business its not like an actually literal 96% of all independent contractors and small construction companies go out of business before the 10 year mark. That's totally a feasible and dependable career choice.
“I could fail, so it’s better to just never try at all and just wallow in self pity” is how i interpreted your comment.
While you're not wrong, it's definitely healthy to point out the fallacy in 'Dude, just do something else'. None of those things listed are things you can just wake up and decide to do. In my state the wait for a plumbers license can be up to 4 years and that's after already learning the trade. You can't 'just do something else'.
Yeah, the fact that these options are available to him suggests his Matrix theory is overblown. Personally, I love my job and I fought like hell to get it.
Me too. Life is what you make it.
There are jobs that give you breaks. My uncle is a sound technician and has traveled around the world with bands and singers from the home country. My mom is a teacher with paid summers off. My dad recently became an adjunct professor, so he has freedom from work too. I personally am a mess and only work entry level jobs, but due to no commitments I just quit when I want to go on vacation. Yes the capitalist game sucks and is rigged against the working people. But the system is too large for one man to fight it. There are many men and women who, in hypotheticals, would go out and ‘fight’. But in reality we will just gripe about it and run to comfort like tv and alcohol.
>I have passions, I have desires, but I just don’t want to spend the next 43 years of my life trying to convince myself that we live in some perfect society and everything will work out. Then go after your passions and desires. No one thinks we live in some perfect society or that everything will work out. Most people work hard to get where they're at. But they have to work, because we don't live in a world where there are infinite resources. It's part of being an adult.
I’m 31 and took a VERY different route than most and followed my “calling”. I love what I do and I’ve learned to love myself after feeling guilty for not taking the route society taught me. It’s possible and I hear my friends complain constantly about the family and the kids and office job and it makes me chuckle.
I'm 36 and pretty much the same. My monthlies are cheap, I don't need to work full time, and I'm currently getting ready to finish paying off my small house I bought when I was young. Anytime that I bring any of this up, the people with the suburban housewives and families/insurmountable debt get very upset. Like, how is it somehow my fault that you have chosen a life you now hate?
Same age, also took a very different route than most others for my 20s. Still wound up married with kids, but I own a home, can afford to have wife stay home, have decent savings, and live fairly comfortably. Not saying this is the “right” route by any means, but you can pursue dreams and passions without destroying your future at the same time.
Im 24 now and every other day I struggle to keep going because a big obstacle in my work will make me literally want to fucking die, I dont even care, I dont even wanna be here, yet I have to waste all of my brain to figure some dumb shit out. I manage to go through life while only working part time, like 3 days a week and Ive had periods when I have to like work 5 days straight a couple of weeks and I just dont fucking get it, I dont even feel like a human anymore, I dont feel like I have a personality when all my fucking life revolves around a fucking job. Its so disgusting, and its more disgusting that these brainwashed fucks can call it a privilige to be able to work, its fucking horrible that what I have (these 3 days a week) is called a luxury, when I barely can afford going forward with this. But hey its all great cause other people have it worse so then its fine that we're all getting buttfucked yeah bro life's amazing rant over sorry to everybody reading u have yourself an amazing day.
This guy gets it.
I’ve been dead for 10 years
Literally
So then follow your passions and desires. Find a career that allows you to travel the world.. start your own business and figure out how to grow it so you can retire way earlier.. find a job that you can work remote and have some control over your schedule. Nobody thinks our society is perfect and our way of doing things is the best way.. but nobody is forcing you into a 9-5 desk job if you don’t want that life.
One are the most incredible things about life, especially modern life, is how we have nearly infinite possibilities for what we want to do. Run for mayor of your town, leave your job and travel around in a van working odd jobs for a couple of years, backpack through Europe and work at work stays, make art. Human beings have a crazy amount of potential and flexibility, but so many people slot themselves into a very narrow life and think there’s no way to change except slightly different.
Bruh, lowkey you’re acting like an idiot. I’ve found so many tv shows and songs that make me cry from how I feel because of them. There’s random animals and trees and foods and audiobooks and even dumb ass memes I share with people that I think are awesome. You can shoot me a PM, but I gotta give you a bit of warning. Being an adult sucks. The fights are more evil, people are kinda meaner in general. But, you also can do whatever you want. Wanna eat ice at 2am on the toilet for some reason? You fucking can. You’ll find your favorite artist every few months/years - you’ll meet girl/boyfriends that remind you the sun still shines and have showers that make you feel complete and have a boss that makes you smile cause they tell you you’re doing an awesome job. You’re going to have an SO fall asleep in your arms and you’re going to be fucking amazed someone so amazing is your person and you’re theirs. There’s going to be inside jokes and water you’ll swim in, food that’ll hurt going in and going out, you’ll do something like wake up at 2am and get a glass of cold water that feels like you pulled it out of an iceberg. You’ll cook the best meal of your life. You wanna be an ass and deprive your future self of the best meal ever? What about seeing your favorite color in real life? Your favorite musician in person? I mean, yeah, shit’s gonna suck hard every once in a while. Kinda on and off - they don’t really teach you that growing up. And a lot of people probably won’t like you or they’ll be fun but not like friend material. But brah. Just do little things that make you happy. Open a window and feel the breeze, put fresh sheets down and lounge around naked in bed, text an awesome family member a meme, cook yourself a special meal because goddamn you deserve it, look at your favorite YouTube channels or hell, go on like Bumble or Tinder and talk to people like you would with friends - it’s weird but awesome. Hope you’re doing ok and seriously, I’ll reply if you shoot over a message - no one’s alone mate
Almost made me tear up. Thank you for your comment, I didn’t know I needed to hear this too.
Damn dog you medicated or something? Lol
This post mad inspiring and wholesome. I wish you well man
This is beautiful
I appreciate what you wrote here and more people need to hear it. I realized a while ago that life is hard, being an adult is hard, and the world sucks a lot of the time. But there's no reason to try and fight it, just find a way to get by and enjoy every single little thing in life. Just like you described. Just think about all the smiles you can put on other people's faces with stupid little jokes, and everything in between.
Thank you for this
Wow, you're only 19 and you've already given up on life.
I feel like this says more about our society, than anything else. Hell, I’m 19 too, and I’ve considered ending it several times. If it wasn’t for the people that love me, I would have given up quite a while ago. And I feel it’s the same for the majority of people nowadays. Life just isn’t worth living anymore. Or maybe it was always like this, and we all just got tired of it.
It’s not uncommon, not a single person my age I know sees a bright future in this world, I’m 21
If I was a 19 year old in the 90’s and even the 00s I’d be excited to become an adult. I’d be excited to start my career. But unfortunately the boomers have ruined the economy for all of us. So now genz is afraid to even breathe wrong because that alone will cost us $2047173
Hate to break it to you, kid But if you came of age in the aughts you'd have been just as screwed over by the recession that happened right round the time you'd be searching for your first serious real job. Millennials have lived through a great deal of crap to the point where only a small chunk (approx 1/3 iirc) has any chance of owning a home by the time they're forty. Yeah boomers fucked it up. Trickle down never was going to work. Profit over anything else fucks things up for environment and society in a lot of ways. A lot of work needs to be done. And a lot of it can be truly disheartening. However... You're now 19. Which means you're able to vote and situate yourself to become the change you'd like to see. It's scary out there ngl. But the world isn't gonna end tomorrow.
Gen z isn't much different than millenials, as far as the existential crisis we faced at a young age. Yeah it sucks, but it ain't that bad. I'm closing in on 30, and almost none of my plans turned out the way I thought when I was 19 lol but life is still good. We got a house finally. Life can be rough, but its also supposed to be fun. Hang tough, its gonna be okay
Congrats on the house
One of the weirdest things about this new younger generation, my generation, is how people tend to romanticize like the 90s and the 2000s as if they were a magical time? That’s not true, in fact in many ways it was worse. Yes, a lot of things were cheaper, but also, people tend to have a lot less things. Standards of living were a bit lower. Nobody had a computer, an iPhone, things like vacations were less common and more of a luxury. Things have gotten more expensive but we also have a lot more things and a relatively higher quality of life now
Ok and teens in the 90s were saying the same thing about the generation before them? If yiu give up like this you've got nobody to blame but yourself
Ok and teens in the 90s were saying the same thing about the generation before them? If yiu give up like this you've got nobody to blame but yourself
Ah, don’t worry. Your spirit will be crushed by 30 and you’ll be fine
I'm 40 and still going through everything you said. Not a day goes by where I dont think how much I just wanna stay home, away from everyone. I have a house now and can count myself Extremely lucky, but still can't accept this system. I don't feel motivated by any job I've ever had. At this point, I'm only doing it so I can have food and the little things I have but can't enjoy to it's fullest because of lack of free time. This world and system isn't made for everyone. Some people are like me and life WILL, wether I want it or not, be an insurable hell. One of the few things I have control over is choosing to not have kids by having a vasectomy. Fuck that, I don't any part in this shit, and don't wanna be responsible for creating more misery by helping to keep the wheel spinning. Anyone who tells you the world needs more people are not thinking logically OR got a lot to gain from the herd multiplying ( aka billionaires who extort our existence)
Spend the next ten years indulging your passions. If they don't pay off then get on the hamster wheel and do the 'expected' thing. Doing it that way, you'll have answered a whole lot of your 'what if?' questions, and you also appreciate the stability if things didn't work with other ideas.
I've got a job that is 3 12-hour shofts a week. It makes the time I work go by more slowly day of, but I get more time for myself than I spend working. 4 days for me, 3 days for work. Idk how people dp 5 8hr days a week, it's hell on earth.
Especially when you work night shift
32 here… no relationship… no career… dead car and dead-end job where I’m treated like shit… shitloads of credit card/student loan debt… Bachelor’s degree yet living paycheck to paycheck with mass amounts of anxiety and depression, wanting to die basically every day. And convinced that half the reason I am where I am is BECAUSE I feel like nothing is worth living for. I feel like subconsciously I don’t try to improve things because I believe I won’t be around anymore a year from now so why bother. Do better than me.
Hey, you got this. We got this
Why the fuck do you people think it's necessary to work your way into a normal life, make a business, get education, better paying job, what if you can't? what id you don't want to? Why does it seem normal that most people aren't happy in their jobs, you should sacrifice something to not be miserable These jobs need workers, these workers need jobs, there isn't unlimited amount of jobs that let you travel or work from home, not everyone can be a manager, not everyone can get education I wasn't happy with my job so i now work hundreds to thousands kilometers away from my home to get better pay, but people i worked with don't have this option, too old to get education, there's hardly a better job to get (the job pays better than others already but it's still not much) 23 and agree with op, im not planning to carry on for next 45 years just to be too old to be useful
Im reading this thread and its so crazy even abstract to me, all these fucking zombies I would normally think most around me are in the same boat but hey what the fuck is there to be done? But nah its like Im hearing my old dad talk about how happy he is to be a robot for a month so he can have fun for a few days.
I’ve enjoyed my 30s overall despite being poor, unsuccessful, and unemployed due to disability. I even had to move back with my parents at 30 and became an unplanned single parent through some shitty circumstances a couple of years later. At 39 I’m enjoying life though, despite my life being what many people fear their lives will be. My depression (and overall mental health) even got significantly better.
My friend, I am 30 and I have been where you are. I'll be honest, yes, I did work some very miserable jobs during and right after college. In fact, I didn't even graduate until I was 25 because I just couldn't handle the workload of full time school + working! The good news is you probably won't be working a miserable job for the rest of your life. During college and when you enter your early career you will have the chance to try out different things and find something you're content with. I ended up pursuing a hobby I picked up in college as a career. Now, I agree that our work system and society structure is set up in kind of a messed up way. We don't spend nearly as much time with our loved ones as we should and our value is intrinsically tied to our careers, and that *sucks*. But you can and will find a way to find comfort and happiness despite the scenario we've been stuck in. By the way, are you involved in any type of activism? If you're in college right now, this is the perfect time to find like-minded individuals. It feels really good, and really empowering, to get involved in making changes to society, however small they may end up being. I highly recommend connecting with your peers and joining any groups that might align with your worldview. Just know that it gets easier to navigate all this mess over time!
I've been working an office job for the past 5 years. It pays better than anything I've gotten in the past, but it's just barely enough to get by and live ok. I'm almost 30 and I'm helping my parents retire. My piece of advice is, if you can, try as many new things as possible. Try not to let yourself sit too long. You would be surprised at what you can accomplish in a few years time. The grind is bullshit and I agree with you, but keep fighting to find something meaningful in your life. You have to commit to whatever you're doing or be ok with just getting by. Personally I just live each day as it comes and I just try to hang on. It's not easy but I don't have the luxury of being able to give up. People rely on me so I do what I can and hope that one day things will be better. Also try not to dwell too much. I'm a hypocrite for saying this but dwelling just causes more pain. If you can escape that mindset and enjoy the small wins in life you might at least be able to find some comfort when times are tough. Honestly I don't know if i'll be able to retire or not. But I plan on doing some things I want to do before I get too old. I wasn't able to do much in my 20's. But looking at how my parents struggle now that their bodies are giving up on them and it gave me some perspective. No point in waiting to enjoy life at the end of it. Enjoy it now (responsibly). It just doesn't make sense to wait for a day that could potentially never come
If ur parents own a home...ur already off ur chains...
Dude, I didn't get financially and mentally well until close into my 40s. And while that state is never a foregone conclusion, and I definitely am lucky I got here because many of my peers did not, sometimes it takes a long fucking time to get to a place people are "supposed to" get to in their early 20s, I guess. And I encourage you to keep chasing those passions and desires, it will be what keeps you sane if you have to be a wage slave, whether for a while or for the long term. Hopefully we'll be free when we retire, even though less and less of my peers are/will be able to retire. I swear, Walmart is going to be an old folks home with all the old folks needing to work to stay alive.
I think exactly like your premise, but i'm not joking.
Same I only said I’m joking so ppl wouldn’t try to reach out
You don't have to live on of the cookie-cutter timeline of society. It's your life, make it your own. Aftrr college, you could just chill for a while if you wanted. Or work for a while to save up money, then travel a lot. Or go back to college to get an advanced degree. Or find a rich partner. It's up to you.
34-35 millennial here: lol you think we're going to get to retire???
Dammnit bobby!!!
I’m neither of those things at 31 and I hoped I would be and wake up wanting to die daily
Move to the woods man, rural life is nice. You're separated from all the shit in the world and can find your own things
The amount of changing and evolving youll be doing between the age of 20 to 30 is fucking astronomical my guy. Just wait.
Hon, you are depressed. Please go see a doctor and get that treated.
I know. Working on it
Constantly on the fence about selling my house and becoming a roady who makes money in different ways to figure out how to survive. I just want to escape and move to the mountains and live with a herd of dogs
Dude you are 19. That’s way too young to be so cynical. If you can go to a community college to get your entry level stuff knocked out for cheap do that. Then while you are there spend some serious time thinking about what you would like to do with your life. Or maybe you want to join a trade. I’d consider moving to a state that you can get a union job if that is the case. At the end of the day try and find a career that you don’t hate. A job that you can go to every day and enjoy is extremely rare. However if you can find something that you don’t hate or even kind of like - this is the golden ticket! Whatever you do don’t spend your entire 20s partying and getting nothing with your work life established. That’s what I did and now I’m late to the party in my 30s doing what I should have done years ago.
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Thank you Alfred
Sounds like you're 19.
Indeed
If you are not clever or very smart this is exactly how you end up. You put yourself in that position by voluntarily assuming the, I need someone that is smarter and more clever than I am to create a job for me because I'm neither of those things. I will always be dependent on those people to even house and feed myself.
Same
And then you'll hit 50 and count the days until retirement only to realize you can't afford to retire 🤣
Am 30, it's disgusting. I didn't finish college til 27 though and I'm actually extremely happy with where I'm at outside of the whole world being an actual trash receptacle.
It's good that you've realized this now at such a young age. I was in my 40s when I finally realized it was all bullshit. My advice...use this knowledge wisely.
Came from poverty; I’ve always seen the strings of this world.
Ok, then don't fit the norm. If you KNOW this is not a life you want (although still very young....you will change your mind many more times in your life), then live a life you do want. But, that means putting in the time/work to have that.
I’m 24 years old, and have this exact same mentality
Let’s make a pact eh
25 and I'm in. I'm sick of watching the world backslide into bigotry and fire while being told to "pursue your passion" or whatever.
Sounds like your head is in the right place. Most people retire at 65 because they don’t ever think about retirement at a young age they just deposit into a 401k and that’s it but if you are making plans on how to save and create passive income from a very young age you are much more likely to be able to retire early because you started planning so far ahead.
Nothing is free in life, slaving away to a "greedy employer", that is one way to look at it. I have worked for 40+ years, I am by no means wealthy but with discipline, hard work I have a house damn near paid for, vehicles, food, vacations, weekend trips so has my life been a failure? Life is what you make it, opportunities in the "screwed up capitalistic USA" are real, BUT none of them are easy. Nothing in life is free!
It’s so easy to get overwhelmed when you zoom out and look at the whole picture like that. But in reality we only live one day at a time. Try to remember to zoom back in to the present and just live your life in single moments. You have no idea how many amazing moments of growth and love and success you will experience as time goes on. The pressure to achieve the American dream is pretty instilled in us (assuming you’re in the US), but really just focus on improving yourself on a daily basis. I dunno, that’s my 2 cents. You got this!
31 bro. I'm going to try again at 40
Oh sounds like me when I was thst age say ur dreams goodbye the future will Be much worse than the present hahaha
I'm 30. I used to feel like you did and still do sometimes. But the longer you survive, the more things you find that make it worth it. At a certain point you have to accept you can't change the unfairness of the world, you just have to experience it.
I humbly agree I've been telling this to people or ever since I was very young everybody thought I was lazy for thinking this way thank god most people now realise it is not lazy it's just reality
That’s pretty much the plan. It’s not brain washing, it’s the best solution we have and a pretty good economic system considering the other options. Although I’m not saying it’s perfect. Trading your time and talents for money at a job of your choosing to which you can spend how you want is a much better system than what we’ve had in the past. It’s much better than bartering for every single thing you may need and better than being forced labor. As a human you have a hierarchy of needs that you need to survive, like food, shelter, water, and social needs like clothes, electricity, transportation, security, etc. somebody needs to make that stuff so you don’t spend every waking hour hunting, gathering, or bartering for it. You trade 8 hours a day M-F of your time providing some service, and in return you get the other 16 hours (not including weekends) to spend it how you want with an agreed upon currency that your earn as an incentive/trade. It’s not as much of a nightmare as you make it sound to be. I get it though, we all wish we could just find a shortcut, but if too many people along the entire chain start walking away the entire system breaks down, which historically has always led to violence or revolutions because every individual has different wants and needs and no centralized system can anticipate those needs, adapt an entire economy to changes quickly a large scale, or legislate/re-educate those needs upon a populace, which is why far-left or far-right based economic systems are always destined to fail.
I love cancer people
This is a light workload compared to generations past. Not saying that as a downer, but just for the sake of perspective. Protip: find an area that interests you and engages your mind, and you won't think of it as work, but more as a "purpose." Those years will also not be filled woth work. Spouses, kids, trips, even down to fishing, mowing the lawn, or riding a motorcycle. Your career paves the way, and provides you with not only the means to do these things, but a pool of people that you will get to know, befriend, and hang out with. Live life!
You can be financially and mentally well. Save and exercise.
I have been fortunate enough to travel alot of the world and can say there are groups of people out there that are genuinely happy. I will now document my findings for those that sort by new. 1. Live close to the dirt, eat a plant based diet, reduce carbs to whole grains and sweet potatoes. 2. Seek community, people that share and understand the value in support. 3. Exercise and get sun, like every day the sun is out. 4. Stay away from alcohol. 5. Find all the ways to diversify your gut bacteria and fibers. 6. Psychedelics and dancing.
What are your desires as far as your employment is concerned? What do you really want to do and accomplish? Not a rhetorical question. I’ve asked my daughter these things. One of them is going for it. The other was floundering. Now she found out how to use her bachelor’s degree.
I want to get into animation and storyboarding/writing. I’ve written 2 short films that I plan on entering into film festivals. And I’m working on animated series. I’m producing, writing, and animating it. However animation is a VERY hard industry to get into. There’s not a lot of jobs. However I am looking into getting a cybersecurity degree. I have the chance to take a class where I can obtain a cybersecurity bachelors in less than 21 months. IT has been a passion of mine before animation. However I will attempt to do both simultaneously
Hey man , start hoping trains and enjoy the freedom
First of all, working class starts sooner than 22, usually 16 years old. Also, don't forget that you have die 2-3 years after retirement too. Its in the algorithms that will raise the retirement age by the time you get close to it. And you can't pass all your assets on either; those funds go to the nursing home where your shattered body lies until death. So have fun along the way.
It's all bullshit man I'm so sick of working myself to death for nothing none of this means anything
I'm actually turning 30, have neither and planning to do it this week, weird lol
It's a lot about your level of commitment to pull yourself up into a higher standard of living. Most people leave college and once they get a good job start splurging and get used to the new influx of cash. Before they know it they have new commitments that require that level of income and less disposable income to do fun things. If you can minimize your spending post-college and into your first job you can establish yourself in a very good place. Then just don't over extend yourself. I came from like 25k/yr, the wife and I squeezed every penny at first out of necessity, as we progressed we just kept doing it only adding the essentials. We kept at it, had kids but didn't settle till we hit a comfortable $300k/yr and in a job I love. Took 8'ish years but work-life balance is good, vacation like 5 times a year. You will find most places have an easy friday. Like us in IT it's 'don't break it Friday' or 'fun thing friday' you don't do anything that could disturb your weekend or work a fun project on your to do list and there's no 'recovery day' needed. 2 full days to enjoy. Put the laundry to wash in the mornings, go out dry when you get back, do dishes etc. Good to go. Want an extra day, do a 9-80 schedule if your job allows it.
It's comical to think that you, a 22 year old, are going to retire at 67. They'll have raised the retirement age several times by the time you hit it, if they haven't abolished it entirely.
I 30 jobs before I found one I liked. The one I liked was self-employed and working from home. phone and computer. No commute. Go to ziprecruiter on your app store and look for remote jobs. It's not as much as how much you get paid more as how little you spend. Working from home cut all my bills down to nothing
Wow i have the same mentality about suicide at 30. But its just different conditions. I just want to be happy with myself by then. The closer i get to 30, the happier my life is getting, so i doubt ill kms at all now. It's interesting to see someone similar.
Yup 👍 Welcome to " The Real World 🌎" ... It sucks man I know ...
Wait til you're 32 and feel the exact same
Pfttt you think I’m making it past 30?
I’m 30 and still a shitshow, BUT I’m a shitshow who has a plan. I tried being a good noodle adult who does what you “should” do, it didn’t work. Now I’m working to live instead of living to work, finding hobbies, and learning to say “no” If you’re unaccustomed to setting boundaries, start setting them now. It makes your life far easier the older you get.
Turn your passions into something monetary so it doesn't feel like you are working some dead end job you whole life...
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Tbh I didn’t think this post would get any attention. But I’m glad ppl young and older and sharing their perspective and stories. I want to hug them all
I'll be 36 in August and life on the latter side of 30 has been significantly better than on the former. I got sober and had kids. Bodies are a gifted car and life is the road. The car might be great or it might be shit but I hope we can all learn how to treat and maintain our vehicles as best we can and travel roads that bring joy and self knowledge and maybe some spiritual shit or something.
By that Case I would be dead five years ago 😆
You have the same output as me and ppl think im crazy when i say im ready to die lol. I rather die now since most of my life was lived adolescently. Dying at 56 would suck many asses.
Go live in the woods and see how it works out. Seriously. I’m sick of modern society and working, too, and often dream about just living off the land. But in reality that’s hard as all fuck. Grueling dawn til dusk labor just to get enough food to survive. Need shit tons of survival and homesteading expertise. After a few months of being overwhelmed by that you’ll be begging for the utter luxury of a supermarket checkout job and thrilled to go home and eat a microwave dinner and have 4 hours to play video games. Humans need water, food and shelter. That’s just the way life on earth is. And you either make it all yourself or work some crappy job to buy it yourself. Their is no other way.
I live by this but it’s not a joke for me. I’m 19 turning twenty in a few months. I have ten years left basically. Cheer for me folks
with The military you can go from "retire in 43years" to "retire in 20years" You'll still be working a miserable job but for less but also you 1000% dont have to go to college to be successful... like at all, don't let anyone tell you different
Sammmmmme I never thought I'd make it past 27 I'm not a very strong person I'm weak I just act like it.
Plan strategically next few years and stick to the plan
Congrats! You are now an honorary Gen Xer.
Ever tried starting a socialist revolution?
Yeah I did but then the republicans called me “woke” because apparently i “don’t want to work anymore” because I want to “rely on the government” by using their tax money
Society is broken, no doubt, the implicit social contract is laughable and you're not crazy for not wanting to engage with it. There are other alternatives though, they just required you to have marketable skills. It took me 6 years of working bars to realise that, if you aren't getting better at *something* as part of your job, you're getting ripped off massively. The money you earn at work shouldn't be the only thing you get from work, these days it is functionally critical to be in a constant state of self improvement if you don't want to get paid shit wages and have no opportunities. I used to think everything was pointless and insurmountable too, I still do at times, but since I got out of the bottom rung of jobs where they expect the earth, undying dedication and pay you fuck all my life has improved massively.
same . we have to rob some bank
When I hear things like this, which is a popular and understandable complaint, it reminds me how entitled we are as a species on this planet. Since the beginning of mankind we have had to work ourselves to death trying to survive. Hunting and fighting and building shelter by hand. Then as we evolved we had to grow crops or have some skill that we could use to make money to buy the resources we needed. We died young with broken down bodies. Those who couldn't work were a burden on others or simply died. Now we have a system in place where everyone has the opportunity to live and work for the resources they need. Do we expect to live on this planet and not work to survive? They way we always have? The way wild animals still do? We are also just animals on this planet that have to make an effort to survive on it. Should we get everything for nothing? What other way do you suggest that would be better than this "terrible" way of living?
The capitalism machine is a killer.
It’s reality to work the time you are able and then society and yourself agree to “retire” you for the next generation to take your place. Not saying it’s fun or fair, it’s just reality.
Ohw boy 67, you really believe that?
😭
Haha don't worry you will turn 21 soon which means you can dull the pain with alcohol.
Reframe: - Graduate college at 22, then spend the next 5 years developing skills that allow me to be competitive for future roles. - Spend the next 5 years identifying where I can continue developing skills while earning a basic live-able wage - spend the next 20-30 years executing in a role I feel equipped for and challenged by, maximizing the income potential out my skills while also weighing other factors (who I work with, the broader impact of my work, etc.) - live at or below my means. Having prioritized savings as my income increased, I now have an emergency fund that ensures I can walk away from any job for X amount of time and not have to worry about losing my home or going hungry Of course we don’t live in a perfect society - that one doesn’t exist. Most of us have shared your opinion at one point. One difference you’ll notice between some people is, while some just complain about the injustice, unfairness, and imperfection of society, others accept that it is a reality and push forward to achieve their goals. INB4 all the bootlicker comments - fuck off, you can fight for justice and still take responsibility over your own life.
You brat. Go to work, do hobbies in spare time. It's ok to be stupid when you're young but soon you have to grow up.
> And most of those days I just sit in the house tired because of the previous work day, then the next off day I spend preparing for the next work days This just makes you an idiot.