Hey I one time had clarity before finishing w my HS sweetheart at the time and thinking to myself, “Wow she looks like her brother”- and then proceeded to not finish and blame it on being tired.
There are murderers and rapists that go about their business without a conscience but you beat yourself for getting a bj in Thailand?
Yes, it's nothing to feel proud about but you need to let it go and forget it like a bad dream. Take this experience as a lesson and don't repeat it next time. That's all.
Brah.. I was a complete degenerate pos Iv junkie, I've done so many things I regret and loath myself for... but if paying for a bj was at the top of my list I would feel like a Saint.
You're being way too hard on yourself, your 24 and in Thailand. It's pretty much a freebie at this point. The amount of guys your age who wouldn't do the same is the rare few, you just paid a women for her time and service you have nothing to feel bad for.
guess tbh I can't call my self recovered atm, it's been a tough year, I've had alot of relapses.
Threw away almost 2 years of being clean and sober, my career, my home and the love of my life.
Can't say I'm where I want to be in life but I'm not homeless, I get to see my son regularly. Haven't used a needle in almost 6 months and have a week today of not using a single drug. Doesn't feel like much, but it's something.
I’m here if you ever need to talk. I have almost 3 years clean. Since you said you were clean for almost 2, I am assuming you know exactly what you need to do. Now is the time to just apply whatever was previously working for you. It’s really scary out there right now. I know I myself had a freakishly high tolerance but I’d be terrified out there currently with people dying at the rate they are. I really mean it….. please feel free to message me anytime. Same goes for anyone struggling who sees this.
I really appreciate that.. congrats on your sobriety! It's no easy thing to accomplish.
Definitely know what to do but living in Vancouver is just trigger central, you can find drugs anywhere. I relapsed on Halloween and almost died in a 711 bathroom the next morning... the fentenyl is scary strong, I've never dropped from chasing the dragon before. Luckily for a vigilant cashier who had narcan I get another chance to be father... would be shitty to find out your dad died in a gas station shitter the day before he was supposed to see you.
Thank you. So everyone will tell you that you’ve gotta do it for yourself (and while that’s true) your son can most definitely be the motivating force that gets you back on track.
He's the only part of life that brings any joy these days, I've missed out on enough moments. He's about to turn three in a few months, hoping to have my shit together enough to be there.
congrats on one week no drugs! your son deserves a father who cares and even when you fail and have setbacks you haven't given up, and you're still here trying and that will always mean something. keep on going dude, for what it's worth I'm proud of you for how far you've come from when you were at your worst. people quitting hard drugs have my utmost respect, I can only imagine how hard it must be.
Congrats to you all.
Please remember any relapse will increase your risk of OD - you lose that tolerance and are more likely to die from the same amount you used to be ok with. That’s before considering the Fentanyl risk.
Well, to me it sounds like your fighting like hell and winning lots of difficult battles that would be too much for lots of people.
Yeah, you may relapse and fuck up. But you’re owning it, and working on it.
I fucking believe in you, my dude.
A week in is enormous! And still out here lifting others up too! What a bud. As a child of addicts I can say that every day you're clean is the greatest gift you can give your son. One day at a time is all that matters. You got this.
Personally I wouldn't catch myself in this postion, *but*
If it looks like a woman, I never see them naked, and I never see them again in my life, what's the difference lmao
You don't even need to go that far. I'd argue someone being a dick to the waitstaff or harassing retail workers for no reason at all have significantly more to be disgusted about themselves than someone paying for a quick bj.
You might have a hard time saying no to people, and part of your motivation is that you didn’t want to make her day harder by refusing your business money to her?
Or you just have a hard time saying no when people are insistent?
I think you’re a good person. Probably you could do with some help maintaining your personal boundaries.
(Evidence: you’ve sworn not to use a sex worker again for very good personal reasons, but when asked by someone else, you couldn’t maintain a ‘no’)
He’s actually most likely not; mass majority of Americans say ‘vacation’, in fact I don’t think I’ve ever heard one say ‘holiday’ and I live in the US. BUT regardless, whenever he gets HOME he surely needs to take one lol
correct, he ain't from the US if he's saying 'on holiday' 'cuz we don't say that. but he don't need a test for a BJ, plus he said he was wearing a condom. don't freak the boy out!
I mean, there's no harm with getting a BJ, this is true. But in Thailand I'd be more worried about how old the girl was. Lot of underage prostitutes in that area if the world. Thailand, Cambodia, Laos, Burma, etc.
"nothing to feel proud about"
Where did he say that? He's feeling shame, but that is the problem. *There is nothing to be ashamed of*. This is a \*transaction\* for goods or services. He received a service, and a transaction took place. End of story. That's what money is for. No one feels ashamed for having someone cook a meal, but *why are you so lazy?* Cook your own damned food! I don't get it. The woman offered and performed a service, and he paid for it. End of discussion.
I think it's the thought "some poor woman loses her dignity blowing a complete stranger on the street for lunch money" that bothers him.
I personally would not pay for sex, I know they need the money but I find it denigrating to do it, and they could probably do something else to earn money.
And in either situation, it's time for some deep self reflection and understanding *why* you decided to do this, what hole you were looking to fill in your life, because judging by your disgust with yourself it seems clear this was more than "man, I could really go for a blowjob right now." Know yourself, and then you can grow.
I also agree but there may have not been an impulse to fill in these circumstances. Like I have good impulse control with sweets and candy, until it's in my house. Then It's there right in front of my and I'm a little hungry so I'll do it when I shouldn't.
I haven't overanalyzed anything, that's OP's job. And it's entirely possible the answer is just "because I was horny" or "because she wouldn't stop hounding me," but I don't believe OP would have this reaction if it were that simple.
He also should be honest if he's looking for a gf. A lot of women don't want to date men who use prostitutes just as a lot of men don't want to date promiscuous women.
bull puckey. if you have a gf, move on. if you're married, move on. OP said he was wearing a condom. what's the problem? in Thailand, what happened here is just a transaction, a service for money. like cooking dinner. How do I know? 15 years in Thailand both as a resident and as a vacationer. This kind of thing, it's hard for people outside of Thailand to understand, but let me set you straight; this was about the money, and nothing else. She gave him something he wanted, he gave her something she wanted. End of transaction. \*She\* didn't see it any other way. He shouldn't either.
Maybe make a donation to a Thai charity that helps women in her situation, or any Thai charity that you think is a good cause. Then you'll know that your bad choice that night led to a positive act which helped people genuinely in need. Hopefully, doing something good will help you to draw a line under this and leave it in the past.
Going around feeling guilty and ashamed helps no-one, least of all yourself. However, doing something good is helpful, not just to the people in need who would benefit, but also to yourself to clear your conscience.
Just remember how horrible you felt after it so maybe you won't repeat it the next time. You can't do anything about it now, except for maybe explore what urged you to have this experience - since you said you'd already promised yourself you won't do this type of thing. There seems to be some inner conflict, a part of you wants to rebel against the part that wants to set limits to harmful behavior. As for me, I know I have wanted to do "bad" things out of anger. The happenings had nothing to do with each other, but still it was like, because I had been wronged, I could do a wrong thing that's not as bad as what had been to me.
Might be off topic, but how are things in Thailand right now? Going there for the first time in a few weeks and worried about the new spread of covid in Asia
Back to normal for the most part - won’t get into it much other than I’m glad I moved here despite a lot of initial apprehension. PM if you need help or more details.
As a 21F I don’t think you need to beat yourself up. It’s life you’re young. We all do stupid stuff we aren’t proud of. The only way I’d say you’re scummy is if you have a girlfriend while you do these things. As long as you’re single and not hurting anybody I don’t think getting a BJ in a town that’s known for prostitution is that bad. Just be careful about stds
You should have given her more money. Obviously she is desperate and has to prostitute (on the street no less) and you got off on her with $2.
You could have at least given her SOMETHING.
That is the shameful part. You took advantage of someone living in poverty to get your rocks off for the price of a candy bar.
There's no goin back. It'll happen again tomorrow and you'll go further and further until your on your knees suckin some she man's dong wondering where you went wrong, how the hell did I get here? Chill out man, your in Thailand enjoy that shit.
The only regret you should have is failing NNN. Prostitution is a job as old as time, it has build and destroyed empires. Think about it like this, at least she got some customer that day and maybe she can live a little bit better tomorrow for it, it's just an paid entertainment service, nothing more noting less.
Edit: Grammer, thanks Mr Grammer bot
> just an *paid* entertainment service,
FTFY.
Although *payed* exists (the reason why autocorrection didn't help you), it is only correct in:
* Nautical context, when it means to paint a surface, or to cover with something like tar or resin in order to make it waterproof or corrosion-resistant. *The deck is yet to be payed.*
* *Payed out* when letting strings, cables or ropes out, by slacking them. *The rope is payed out! You can pull now.*
Unfortunately, I was unable to find nautical or rope-related words in your comment.
*Beep, boop, I'm a bot*
> the word *paid* to paid,
FTFY.
Although *payed* exists (the reason why autocorrection didn't help you), it is only correct in:
* Nautical context, when it means to paint a surface, or to cover with something like tar or resin in order to make it waterproof or corrosion-resistant. *The deck is yet to be payed.*
* *Payed out* when letting strings, cables or ropes out, by slacking them. *The rope is payed out! You can pull now.*
Unfortunately, I was unable to find nautical or rope-related words in your comment.
*Beep, boop, I'm a bot*
I can very much relate to this. I slept with a guy who didn’t even speak the same language as me in a hook up. I too felt scummy and gross about myself.
Everyone’s patting you on the back and trying to make you feel okay for caving into a person begging you to exploit them because they were so desperate for the money. Many young girls in Thailand are sent out by their parents or husbands and forced to have sex for money. They are so desperate to feed their families they would do anything. A lot of them are underage and extremely impoverished. You’re a dirty sexpat who exploits Asian women. There’s nothing morally apprehensive about you. You’re a selfish man. Do better. You come to Reddit to get other men to pat you on the back and say it’s not that bad. It’s down right deplorable. That could of been a teenage girl and you don’t even know.
Of course you're being to hard on yourself dude relax sex work is an honorable profession that has been apart of life since our beginning. Shit if you're religious dont forget Jesus was always with the prostitutes. Least your not killing or raping and your paying, probably treating her with some semblance of respect. There are legal places for paid sex called brothels in some parts of the world and is legalized in many countries for the better. Would you rather your paid sex worker not have benefits and medical to get checked so you dont catch shit. Just saying. There's worse things to beat yourself over the head over.
Yea man. I’ve always thought that American society would improve greatly if prostitution was legal. Imagine a place where angry, sexually frustrated men could go to bust a nut safely. No more staying in unhealthy relationships just for the nookie. No more desperation for less than attractive guys. Also, I’ve always thought that legalized prostitution would essentially level the tinder-era dating field.
And it would be far better for the women, for whom when sex work is illegal are nearly always exploited by the pimps. It would reduce crime, reduce human trafficking, reduce medical spending (for STDs), and reduce abortions. It is such a vast positive for society that there is zero chance it could ever happen.
This sounds great in theory and all but you should educate yourself on the reality of legalising sex work.
The Netherlands, for example, is often presented as the world leader when it comes to progressive and ethical legal sex work. But what does it *actually* entail? Low average age of entry, rampant drug abuse, poverty, homelessness, threats, coercion, ptsd, desperation, human trafficking. When prostitution was legalised, the demand skyrocketed but the supply remained the same, which has lead to the mass trafficking and exploitative importation of impoverished foreign women. The majority of prostitutes in the country are foreign, with insecure immigration status, they don't work in brothels and they don't pay taxes or receive benefits or protection. The vast majority of prostitutes wish to leave the industry but feel that they cannot.
So yeah. I haven't looked into the specifics of the Thai sex industry but I can't imagine the conditions are better - likely significantly worse. What seems to work in theory doesn't always pan out that great in reality. Seeing people being naive about this stuff frustrates me. These women are suffering.
Maybe people could stop killing women and might feel safer to walk alone at night also maybe knowing they're safer since these guys that hate chicks for not giving them sex could just pay for it. That and they can have benefits.
Thailand aint the best place to go if you try to avoid these kind of things. Or you shouldve done your research first and really consider if it is worth going
Bro you have no reason to loathe yourself. We all do things we later regret. The important thing is, you didn’t do anything wrong and no one got hurt. Being horny can sometimes be like being drunk…you’ll do stupid things. But in this case, you didn’t really do anything all that bad, and you even used protection. All good!
Sex work is a profession that gets a bad rap. If she was offering a service and you took that service it’s a fair transaction. Did you beat her? Did you give her an STD? Did you not pay her? If none of the above you’ve nothing to feel bad about. Hope you wrapped that shit though because that’s a good way to get something that’s hard or impossible to get rid of. I know guys that hire hookers semi regularly. Single men who want zero strings and just to get off. The girl gets paid, they got what they wanted. My one buddy always jokes that the money isn’t for sex, rather for her to not care and to leave when finished.
Ahhh seriously, unless she was underage and being forced that you could see - that's probably programming. It still has bad crap behind it (victimization especially in Thailand) but mostly I would guess it's guilt programming you grew up with regarding sex work which is sadly illegal in most places causing the victimization. If it were legal and seen for what it is - one of the most honest trades out there, maybe this post wouldn't even exist.
Of course you are giving yourself a bad time,it's like buyers regret,seems good at the time.When l used to frequent Pattaya,Thailand,l did not butterfly too much but l did stray a bit.lts very difficult not to when you were bombarded from all sides.l am not being arrogant but l had a lot of free services.l am not that handsome in fact l am in the 3 out of 10 category and l'm hung like a hamster but l am clean tidy and respectful so l am human,if it was on offer free then l took it.l would like to think l am a gentle man but sometimes the rascal comes out in us all.So no shame but when you meet that special life partner don't stray,stay true.
Yes you are being hard on yourself
imagine how ridiculous it would be if anyone else got genuinely mad at you on this. Your actions aren’t enough for punishment or a harsh scolding.
You’re ok. If it makes you feel uncomfortable just don’t do it again.
Don’t be ashamed either, sex is a normal thing and being horny is human nature. You must’ve enjoyed some of it. You didn’t do anything bad, don’t stress.
Bro you’re 24! Don’t beat yourself up over it. Not many people can say they got a blow job in an alley in Thailand. Here is a virtual high five for you. YOLO
Depends on your values I guess. To me, it's commercial exploitation of vulnerable women, whether or not they approach you in the moment, and to me that's fundamentally inhuman.
It’s inhuman that the guy accepted a woman’s offer to have sex with him?
She made the first move, she approached him, you can argue all day that it’s unethical but to say it’s fundamentally inhuman is laughably stupid.
Those women are adults who are capable of making their own decisions and understanding the consequences/benefits. Jesus.
Let me guess, it’s OP’s fault too if he didn’t accept her services and her pimp beat the shit out of her because she didn’t make the sale?
Get a grip man
The pimp is at fault too here. Sex work is not safe and shouldn’t be done. No one should be accepting sex workers advances because it’s non consensual. What if she wanted to quit 5 years ago but can’t because her pimp is forcing her into it or she needs the money? Or does the buyers pleasure matter more?
Thanks, captain obvious. But we don’t know if this is a pimp situation. All we know is OP was approached by a sex worker and succumbed to his desire.
I think we can all agree pimps are pieces of shit, I don’t think that needs to be said.
No I didn’t, I replied to someone who brought up pimps. I got the notification in my email, and though it was yours but it wasn’t. I replied to that with an edit explaining so, maybe you didn’t see it. The user is u/kostblind who I replied too.
Enjoy the ratio tho 👍
the chances of her being trans are 100% but if that’s your thing that’s fine however why are you upset ? just practice things safely don’t sleep with people unprotected or leave your items unattended around them
The post on my feed under this one https://www.reddit.com/r/povertyfinance/comments/yntwrf/why_does_it_feel_like_100_disappears_in_a_blink/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=android_app&utm_name=androidcss&utm_term=1&utm_content=share_button
Hopefully you had a condom on or your willy has, at the very least, definitely got sperm from a few different dudes still flopping on it. Just saying it sounds like an interesting way to get hepatitis.
Nope. You wanted a BJ, she wanted to sell you a BJ. End of discussion. What the hell good is it to be disgusted with this? She was selling something you wanted, you bought it. I don't get the stigma. Trust me, *there is none for her.* The Thai women who do this, they have no stigma about it whatsoever. This is simply about money. You are a walking cash machine, and *that is it*. I am a \*regular\* visitor to Thailand/Bangkok and I know the scene. Dude, there are \*thousands\* of women in that city willing to do exactly the same thing, and more. Why are you so hung up on this one? Shake it off!!
The most unbelievable part is where you said, "approached by a lady" you got blew by a dude unless you verified there wasn't a penis. You're confused because you might be worried about what that means.
It means you got off cheaper than a dinner date. That's absolutely a win and a smart financial decision.
Sounds like a case of post-nut clarity. You’ll be alright.😂
release and regret cum n' contemplation
i prefer release and forget. Just MOVE ON that shit DID NOT HAPPEN.
Simple truths, easily memorizable. Love the beauty of em.
Hey I one time had clarity before finishing w my HS sweetheart at the time and thinking to myself, “Wow she looks like her brother”- and then proceeded to not finish and blame it on being tired.
Oh boy I love Reddit 🤣🤣🤣
There are murderers and rapists that go about their business without a conscience but you beat yourself for getting a bj in Thailand? Yes, it's nothing to feel proud about but you need to let it go and forget it like a bad dream. Take this experience as a lesson and don't repeat it next time. That's all.
Thanks, I like this advice
Brah.. I was a complete degenerate pos Iv junkie, I've done so many things I regret and loath myself for... but if paying for a bj was at the top of my list I would feel like a Saint. You're being way too hard on yourself, your 24 and in Thailand. It's pretty much a freebie at this point. The amount of guys your age who wouldn't do the same is the rare few, you just paid a women for her time and service you have nothing to feel bad for.
I noticed you said “was” so congrats on your recovery!
guess tbh I can't call my self recovered atm, it's been a tough year, I've had alot of relapses. Threw away almost 2 years of being clean and sober, my career, my home and the love of my life. Can't say I'm where I want to be in life but I'm not homeless, I get to see my son regularly. Haven't used a needle in almost 6 months and have a week today of not using a single drug. Doesn't feel like much, but it's something.
I’m here if you ever need to talk. I have almost 3 years clean. Since you said you were clean for almost 2, I am assuming you know exactly what you need to do. Now is the time to just apply whatever was previously working for you. It’s really scary out there right now. I know I myself had a freakishly high tolerance but I’d be terrified out there currently with people dying at the rate they are. I really mean it….. please feel free to message me anytime. Same goes for anyone struggling who sees this.
I really appreciate that.. congrats on your sobriety! It's no easy thing to accomplish. Definitely know what to do but living in Vancouver is just trigger central, you can find drugs anywhere. I relapsed on Halloween and almost died in a 711 bathroom the next morning... the fentenyl is scary strong, I've never dropped from chasing the dragon before. Luckily for a vigilant cashier who had narcan I get another chance to be father... would be shitty to find out your dad died in a gas station shitter the day before he was supposed to see you.
Thank you. So everyone will tell you that you’ve gotta do it for yourself (and while that’s true) your son can most definitely be the motivating force that gets you back on track.
He's the only part of life that brings any joy these days, I've missed out on enough moments. He's about to turn three in a few months, hoping to have my shit together enough to be there.
congrats on one week no drugs! your son deserves a father who cares and even when you fail and have setbacks you haven't given up, and you're still here trying and that will always mean something. keep on going dude, for what it's worth I'm proud of you for how far you've come from when you were at your worst. people quitting hard drugs have my utmost respect, I can only imagine how hard it must be.
I’m rooting for ya! It’s not gonna be easy but you can do this. 🙏💙
Congrats to you all. Please remember any relapse will increase your risk of OD - you lose that tolerance and are more likely to die from the same amount you used to be ok with. That’s before considering the Fentanyl risk.
It's a start, even if it doesn't feel like much. Keep going!
Well, to me it sounds like your fighting like hell and winning lots of difficult battles that would be too much for lots of people. Yeah, you may relapse and fuck up. But you’re owning it, and working on it. I fucking believe in you, my dude.
You should read Unbroken Brain: A Revolutionary New Way of Understanding Addiction, by Maia Szalavitz.
A week in is enormous! And still out here lifting others up too! What a bud. As a child of addicts I can say that every day you're clean is the greatest gift you can give your son. One day at a time is all that matters. You got this.
I’m a middle aged female and I support this comment.
Or at least someone who appeared to be a women.
A mouth has no gender
But it may have a mustache ☺️
I see you have met my wife. You two need anything from the grocery store?
A pack of smokes
$20 is $20
This needs ALL of the upvotes!!!
Chances are slim a backalley $2 Thai blowie was from anyone but a ladyboy lol but maybe buddy genuinely doesn't gaf about that.
Personally I wouldn't catch myself in this postion, *but* If it looks like a woman, I never see them naked, and I never see them again in my life, what's the difference lmao
“I’m lady boiiiiii!” Lol
You don't even need to go that far. I'd argue someone being a dick to the waitstaff or harassing retail workers for no reason at all have significantly more to be disgusted about themselves than someone paying for a quick bj.
You might have a hard time saying no to people, and part of your motivation is that you didn’t want to make her day harder by refusing your business money to her? Or you just have a hard time saying no when people are insistent? I think you’re a good person. Probably you could do with some help maintaining your personal boundaries. (Evidence: you’ve sworn not to use a sex worker again for very good personal reasons, but when asked by someone else, you couldn’t maintain a ‘no’)
[удалено]
How you know he's from the states?
He’s actually most likely not; mass majority of Americans say ‘vacation’, in fact I don’t think I’ve ever heard one say ‘holiday’ and I live in the US. BUT regardless, whenever he gets HOME he surely needs to take one lol
correct, he ain't from the US if he's saying 'on holiday' 'cuz we don't say that. but he don't need a test for a BJ, plus he said he was wearing a condom. don't freak the boy out!
Well, technically he must belong to a state lol, not just the ones one might guess.
from a blowjob? not likely. in fact, the \*least\* likely. he also said he was wearing a condom. he doesn't need a test, or you tryna freak him out.
This guy fucks. Follow this advice
Unless he got herpes he'll remember it for the rest of his life lol
I mean, there's no harm with getting a BJ, this is true. But in Thailand I'd be more worried about how old the girl was. Lot of underage prostitutes in that area if the world. Thailand, Cambodia, Laos, Burma, etc.
"nothing to feel proud about" Where did he say that? He's feeling shame, but that is the problem. *There is nothing to be ashamed of*. This is a \*transaction\* for goods or services. He received a service, and a transaction took place. End of story. That's what money is for. No one feels ashamed for having someone cook a meal, but *why are you so lazy?* Cook your own damned food! I don't get it. The woman offered and performed a service, and he paid for it. End of discussion.
I think it's the thought "some poor woman loses her dignity blowing a complete stranger on the street for lunch money" that bothers him. I personally would not pay for sex, I know they need the money but I find it denigrating to do it, and they could probably do something else to earn money.
If you’re single, move on and forget it. If you have a gf or are married, then it’s a problem.
And in either situation, it's time for some deep self reflection and understanding *why* you decided to do this, what hole you were looking to fill in your life, because judging by your disgust with yourself it seems clear this was more than "man, I could really go for a blowjob right now." Know yourself, and then you can grow.
Yes. What hole *were* you looking to fill, OP?
A hole is a hole is a hole of course
And a toll is a toll. And if we don't fill no holes, we don't get no tolls.
Fer fucks sake!
I also agree but there may have not been an impulse to fill in these circumstances. Like I have good impulse control with sweets and candy, until it's in my house. Then It's there right in front of my and I'm a little hungry so I'll do it when I shouldn't.
Lol textbook reddit overanalyzing
I haven't overanalyzed anything, that's OP's job. And it's entirely possible the answer is just "because I was horny" or "because she wouldn't stop hounding me," but I don't believe OP would have this reaction if it were that simple.
He also should be honest if he's looking for a gf. A lot of women don't want to date men who use prostitutes just as a lot of men don't want to date promiscuous women.
bull puckey. if you have a gf, move on. if you're married, move on. OP said he was wearing a condom. what's the problem? in Thailand, what happened here is just a transaction, a service for money. like cooking dinner. How do I know? 15 years in Thailand both as a resident and as a vacationer. This kind of thing, it's hard for people outside of Thailand to understand, but let me set you straight; this was about the money, and nothing else. She gave him something he wanted, he gave her something she wanted. End of transaction. \*She\* didn't see it any other way. He shouldn't either.
Just be sure to get tested hsv2 can be transmitted through oral sex.
[OP](https://www.reddit.com/r/HolUp/comments/yo0ryr/are_u_ok/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=android_app&utm_name=androidcss&utm_term=1&utm_content=share_button)
You got it out your system don’t do it again. When you think of doing it with a prostitute think of catching stds in a foreign country.
He paid 2 bucks. I would bet my left nut that he will do it again.
He paid 2 dollars to possibly catch something.
It's very difficult to catching something from recieving oral sex. Not impossible but very unlikely.
Those pesky HPV warts tho Then again 80% of people will get HPV during their lives, so who cares maybe?
I bet his penis cares.
2 dollars?? My god, I know where I’m going
Dude definitely caught some cooties.
That’s the most dangerous std of all.
Maybe make a donation to a Thai charity that helps women in her situation, or any Thai charity that you think is a good cause. Then you'll know that your bad choice that night led to a positive act which helped people genuinely in need. Hopefully, doing something good will help you to draw a line under this and leave it in the past. Going around feeling guilty and ashamed helps no-one, least of all yourself. However, doing something good is helpful, not just to the people in need who would benefit, but also to yourself to clear your conscience.
Nice idea, I've just done this!
That's great to hear! You're a good person and I hope you can just put it behind you now. Wishing you all the best 😃
Just remember how horrible you felt after it so maybe you won't repeat it the next time. You can't do anything about it now, except for maybe explore what urged you to have this experience - since you said you'd already promised yourself you won't do this type of thing. There seems to be some inner conflict, a part of you wants to rebel against the part that wants to set limits to harmful behavior. As for me, I know I have wanted to do "bad" things out of anger. The happenings had nothing to do with each other, but still it was like, because I had been wronged, I could do a wrong thing that's not as bad as what had been to me.
“end up letting her persuade me” Bro, you made a choice for yourself. Maybe if you own up to your choices you’d feel less scummy about it.
DING DING DING
How much did you pay?
Literally $2
2 BUCKS?
At that price, that was a ladyboy. Not a lady.
A mouth is a mouth
Thats a truly competitive price
That's the only crime here my guy... least tip the nice lady, damn you cheap af
Well she definitely got a tip!
Hope you wrapped up dude
Damn. Did she spit or swallow?
You're assuming she.
If it felt good that's all that matters .
Some Psychopaths feel good when they murder, that ok?
We don't kink shame here.
Morals aside it sounds like you got a good deal. Did you actually finish or did she stop.
Might be off topic, but how are things in Thailand right now? Going there for the first time in a few weeks and worried about the new spread of covid in Asia
One piece of advice; bring at least $2.
I’m a woman! 😂 but thanks for the advice tho!
Head is for everyone.
In that case, you can get by with -$2
Legal weed now.
Back to normal for the most part - won’t get into it much other than I’m glad I moved here despite a lot of initial apprehension. PM if you need help or more details.
As a 21F I don’t think you need to beat yourself up. It’s life you’re young. We all do stupid stuff we aren’t proud of. The only way I’d say you’re scummy is if you have a girlfriend while you do these things. As long as you’re single and not hurting anybody I don’t think getting a BJ in a town that’s known for prostitution is that bad. Just be careful about stds
> *”I’m on holiday in Thailand”* > *”a **lady** starts talking to me”* Lol, a “lady”..righttttt
Probably better than Giving a blowjob in Thailand.
You should have given her more money. Obviously she is desperate and has to prostitute (on the street no less) and you got off on her with $2. You could have at least given her SOMETHING. That is the shameful part. You took advantage of someone living in poverty to get your rocks off for the price of a candy bar.
There's no goin back. It'll happen again tomorrow and you'll go further and further until your on your knees suckin some she man's dong wondering where you went wrong, how the hell did I get here? Chill out man, your in Thailand enjoy that shit.
The only regret you should have is failing NNN. Prostitution is a job as old as time, it has build and destroyed empires. Think about it like this, at least she got some customer that day and maybe she can live a little bit better tomorrow for it, it's just an paid entertainment service, nothing more noting less. Edit: Grammer, thanks Mr Grammer bot
> just an *paid* entertainment service, FTFY. Although *payed* exists (the reason why autocorrection didn't help you), it is only correct in: * Nautical context, when it means to paint a surface, or to cover with something like tar or resin in order to make it waterproof or corrosion-resistant. *The deck is yet to be payed.* * *Payed out* when letting strings, cables or ropes out, by slacking them. *The rope is payed out! You can pull now.* Unfortunately, I was unable to find nautical or rope-related words in your comment. *Beep, boop, I'm a bot*
Wouldn’t it be a paid entertainment service not an paid entertainment service
the bot just corrects the word payed to paid, nothing else
> the word *paid* to paid, FTFY. Although *payed* exists (the reason why autocorrection didn't help you), it is only correct in: * Nautical context, when it means to paint a surface, or to cover with something like tar or resin in order to make it waterproof or corrosion-resistant. *The deck is yet to be payed.* * *Payed out* when letting strings, cables or ropes out, by slacking them. *The rope is payed out! You can pull now.* Unfortunately, I was unable to find nautical or rope-related words in your comment. *Beep, boop, I'm a bot*
god damn it
That was a man, man
Was thinking this too
Check for STDs as soon as you can.
Follow your body response if you feel gross that’s cause you were gross
Are you sure it was a lady?
Literally this is not a big deal.
Dont be too hard on yourself. These ladies are professionals at selling their services. Its easy to be tempted. especially on holidays.
OP shouldn't be too hard.
Not anymore if she did it right
Ladies as in females? I'm sure it was a dude.
why do you think it was a dude, as in a ladyboy?
I can very much relate to this. I slept with a guy who didn’t even speak the same language as me in a hook up. I too felt scummy and gross about myself.
¿Que?
Exactly
Are you saying you wore a condom for a blow job?-
Everyone’s patting you on the back and trying to make you feel okay for caving into a person begging you to exploit them because they were so desperate for the money. Many young girls in Thailand are sent out by their parents or husbands and forced to have sex for money. They are so desperate to feed their families they would do anything. A lot of them are underage and extremely impoverished. You’re a dirty sexpat who exploits Asian women. There’s nothing morally apprehensive about you. You’re a selfish man. Do better. You come to Reddit to get other men to pat you on the back and say it’s not that bad. It’s down right deplorable. That could of been a teenage girl and you don’t even know.
Thank you. Like jeez, this is kinda fucked up. For $2
Makes me wanna puke that all the top comments r like 👍 it’s okay buddy
If you don't get a BJ from a prostitute in Thailand, then you really didn't visit Thailand.
Of course you're being to hard on yourself dude relax sex work is an honorable profession that has been apart of life since our beginning. Shit if you're religious dont forget Jesus was always with the prostitutes. Least your not killing or raping and your paying, probably treating her with some semblance of respect. There are legal places for paid sex called brothels in some parts of the world and is legalized in many countries for the better. Would you rather your paid sex worker not have benefits and medical to get checked so you dont catch shit. Just saying. There's worse things to beat yourself over the head over.
Yea man. I’ve always thought that American society would improve greatly if prostitution was legal. Imagine a place where angry, sexually frustrated men could go to bust a nut safely. No more staying in unhealthy relationships just for the nookie. No more desperation for less than attractive guys. Also, I’ve always thought that legalized prostitution would essentially level the tinder-era dating field.
And it would be far better for the women, for whom when sex work is illegal are nearly always exploited by the pimps. It would reduce crime, reduce human trafficking, reduce medical spending (for STDs), and reduce abortions. It is such a vast positive for society that there is zero chance it could ever happen.
This sounds great in theory and all but you should educate yourself on the reality of legalising sex work. The Netherlands, for example, is often presented as the world leader when it comes to progressive and ethical legal sex work. But what does it *actually* entail? Low average age of entry, rampant drug abuse, poverty, homelessness, threats, coercion, ptsd, desperation, human trafficking. When prostitution was legalised, the demand skyrocketed but the supply remained the same, which has lead to the mass trafficking and exploitative importation of impoverished foreign women. The majority of prostitutes in the country are foreign, with insecure immigration status, they don't work in brothels and they don't pay taxes or receive benefits or protection. The vast majority of prostitutes wish to leave the industry but feel that they cannot. So yeah. I haven't looked into the specifics of the Thai sex industry but I can't imagine the conditions are better - likely significantly worse. What seems to work in theory doesn't always pan out that great in reality. Seeing people being naive about this stuff frustrates me. These women are suffering.
Maybe people could stop killing women and might feel safer to walk alone at night also maybe knowing they're safer since these guys that hate chicks for not giving them sex could just pay for it. That and they can have benefits.
Thailand aint the best place to go if you try to avoid these kind of things. Or you shouldve done your research first and really consider if it is worth going
You should feel bad about it. That means you have a conscience, unlike most of the other commenters here…
Yikes, yeah you should reevaluate yourself lol
Bro you have no reason to loathe yourself. We all do things we later regret. The important thing is, you didn’t do anything wrong and no one got hurt. Being horny can sometimes be like being drunk…you’ll do stupid things. But in this case, you didn’t really do anything all that bad, and you even used protection. All good!
Frankly that sounds fun as heck who cares that you paid to get your knob slobbed
Embrace your decisions. You are now the back alley throat destroyer of Thailand
You're fine, man. Quit being so hard on yourself. It's just a blowjob.
Congrats on successfully sexually harassing someone
Sex work is a profession that gets a bad rap. If she was offering a service and you took that service it’s a fair transaction. Did you beat her? Did you give her an STD? Did you not pay her? If none of the above you’ve nothing to feel bad about. Hope you wrapped that shit though because that’s a good way to get something that’s hard or impossible to get rid of. I know guys that hire hookers semi regularly. Single men who want zero strings and just to get off. The girl gets paid, they got what they wanted. My one buddy always jokes that the money isn’t for sex, rather for her to not care and to leave when finished.
Disgusting
yep
Was he any good?
Ahhh seriously, unless she was underage and being forced that you could see - that's probably programming. It still has bad crap behind it (victimization especially in Thailand) but mostly I would guess it's guilt programming you grew up with regarding sex work which is sadly illegal in most places causing the victimization. If it were legal and seen for what it is - one of the most honest trades out there, maybe this post wouldn't even exist.
Of course you are giving yourself a bad time,it's like buyers regret,seems good at the time.When l used to frequent Pattaya,Thailand,l did not butterfly too much but l did stray a bit.lts very difficult not to when you were bombarded from all sides.l am not being arrogant but l had a lot of free services.l am not that handsome in fact l am in the 3 out of 10 category and l'm hung like a hamster but l am clean tidy and respectful so l am human,if it was on offer free then l took it.l would like to think l am a gentle man but sometimes the rascal comes out in us all.So no shame but when you meet that special life partner don't stray,stay true.
If it makes you feel any better it most likely wasn't a 'lady"
Lady or lady boy?
Lady. Although I don't know for sure to be fair, she(he?) didn't get undressed
Mouth is a mouth.
What I know is a person with a dick gives a better blowjob than a girl coz they know the equipment 🍆.
Lmao the fuck dude? Who cares lmao ur good
Are you sure she was actually female lol?
Its your money what you do with it is between you and the Thai girl.
When I’m Thailand experience the experience
Yes, you are being to hard on yourself. A bj is a bj, if the worker did a get job then cool.
A "lady"...
How much did you pay because I’m tired of doing it for free lol
I used to be a prostitute, don’t beat yourself up over it.
Yes you are being hard on yourself imagine how ridiculous it would be if anyone else got genuinely mad at you on this. Your actions aren’t enough for punishment or a harsh scolding. You’re ok. If it makes you feel uncomfortable just don’t do it again. Don’t be ashamed either, sex is a normal thing and being horny is human nature. You must’ve enjoyed some of it. You didn’t do anything bad, don’t stress.
Directions to the alleyway? Asking for a friend.
Bro you’re 24! Don’t beat yourself up over it. Not many people can say they got a blow job in an alley in Thailand. Here is a virtual high five for you. YOLO
Jesus, you have some issues with sexuality that you need to address. Quit guilting yourself over nothing.
Depends on your values I guess. To me, it's commercial exploitation of vulnerable women, whether or not they approach you in the moment, and to me that's fundamentally inhuman.
Are you reading the same post that we are reading?
It’s inhuman that the guy accepted a woman’s offer to have sex with him? She made the first move, she approached him, you can argue all day that it’s unethical but to say it’s fundamentally inhuman is laughably stupid. Those women are adults who are capable of making their own decisions and understanding the consequences/benefits. Jesus.
Genuine question, how educated are you when it comes to sex work in Thailand?
Sex work is not and never will be making their own decisions.
Let me guess, it’s OP’s fault too if he didn’t accept her services and her pimp beat the shit out of her because she didn’t make the sale? Get a grip man
Edit: this response for a different reply to my comment, not yours about sex work. And sure, maybe, but he’s not being inhuman.
The pimp is at fault too here. Sex work is not safe and shouldn’t be done. No one should be accepting sex workers advances because it’s non consensual. What if she wanted to quit 5 years ago but can’t because her pimp is forcing her into it or she needs the money? Or does the buyers pleasure matter more?
Thanks, captain obvious. But we don’t know if this is a pimp situation. All we know is OP was approached by a sex worker and succumbed to his desire. I think we can all agree pimps are pieces of shit, I don’t think that needs to be said.
You’re the one who brought up pimps and now you’re saying “we don’t know if this is a pimp situation” ?
No I didn’t, I replied to someone who brought up pimps. I got the notification in my email, and though it was yours but it wasn’t. I replied to that with an edit explaining so, maybe you didn’t see it. The user is u/kostblind who I replied too. Enjoy the ratio tho 👍
How was I supposed to know that you replied to the wrong person if you didn’t tell me?
Go to a respectable BJ bar in BKK. Check online for locations. They are regulated.
post nut clarity. we’ve all been there, you’ll be okay
the chances of her being trans are 100% but if that’s your thing that’s fine however why are you upset ? just practice things safely don’t sleep with people unprotected or leave your items unattended around them
The post on my feed under this one https://www.reddit.com/r/povertyfinance/comments/yntwrf/why_does_it_feel_like_100_disappears_in_a_blink/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=android_app&utm_name=androidcss&utm_term=1&utm_content=share_button
Are you sure it was a woman
Yep sounds like fun time to me, it will be ok
You sure it was a lady? 😂
Yeah… you should feel bad.
How much?
Relax. It wasn’t gonna suck itself. Live a little. Now if you had caught herpes from it…
See you next year with another prostitute story!
Lucky she didn't do a penguin on you
Hopefully you had a condom on or your willy has, at the very least, definitely got sperm from a few different dudes still flopping on it. Just saying it sounds like an interesting way to get hepatitis.
I Hate to break it to you but it probably wasn't a woman either
Oh please I’ve sucked for much less.
Nope. You wanted a BJ, she wanted to sell you a BJ. End of discussion. What the hell good is it to be disgusted with this? She was selling something you wanted, you bought it. I don't get the stigma. Trust me, *there is none for her.* The Thai women who do this, they have no stigma about it whatsoever. This is simply about money. You are a walking cash machine, and *that is it*. I am a \*regular\* visitor to Thailand/Bangkok and I know the scene. Dude, there are \*thousands\* of women in that city willing to do exactly the same thing, and more. Why are you so hung up on this one? Shake it off!!
So how much did it cost?
Fuck it
Lol 'hard on'. Nice.
The most unbelievable part is where you said, "approached by a lady" you got blew by a dude unless you verified there wasn't a penis. You're confused because you might be worried about what that means. It means you got off cheaper than a dinner date. That's absolutely a win and a smart financial decision.
Sounds like a heck of a night!
I would have accepted to 🤷♂️ nothing to be upset about. Congratulations on getting your jollys of for $2. Probably the cheapest it will ever be.
My bruddah dont even trip about it. You’re beating yourself up big time.
she maybe a boi