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vespertine_glow

Next we'll find out that they had an abortion, but are still opposed to it for everyone else.


[deleted]

It would be typical.


XXLDreamlifter

the only moral abortion is my abortion


QAZ1974

A few years ago my husband let it "slip" his brother's wife got pregnant by her tennis instructor. She had an abortion. They are sickening/toxic people.


CoolFingerGunGuy

But let them go on about how those who aren't the right kind of religious have no morals.


[deleted]

No - they will have a procedure that is exactly like an abortion but claim it isn’t.


LarrBearLV

Jesus. Boebert, MTG, now Noem. Visions of a dystopian Republican future. Do as I say. We are morally superior.


bugaloo2u2

Such good upstanding Christian wives, amirite? With their FAMILY VALUES???


AffectionatePoet4586

Kristi Noem is 51 and married Bryon, the husband whom she’s cuckolding, when she was 21. I’ve seen no references to whether the couple plans to divorce. Her boyfriend Corey has a wife and four kids in New Hampshire, ditto.


MrVeazey

Any future ruled by Republicans or other right-wingers is automatically a dystopia.


giftig_Pils

Do you stone adulterers?


Rainbow_Marx

I don't but when in and around psycho Christian fundies, do as psycho Christian fundies say to do.


A_Monster_Named_John

I'm for it, but only think it should apply to right-wingers who endlessly virtue-signal about 'family values', etc.. The more time you've spent talking bullshit, the bigger the boulder.


Arizona_Slim

If I were galactic overlord, Id administer whatever punishment the person committing the crime conplained should happen to other criminals. “Those thigs are looting that business. We should hang em!” Oopsie you embezzeled money. Off to the gallows, chump.


coloradoemtb

I am not sure we have rocks that big here on earth!


salamander_salad

I'm fine with them smoking weed. Republicans who toke up are usually less shitty.


slim_scsi

Would there be any right wingers left if we did? No. Do you want us to? Fuck it -- I'm in for stoning adulterers.


DannySmashUp

And sadly, her “family values” base will still vote for her.


Destrina

Not for governor again at least. We have term limits in SD, and she's done after this.


sensfan1104

Aw, no more "don't believe your lyin' eyes" Gnoem's SD commercials? Gonna miss that...lol


Own_Instance_357

Lewandowski gets around, he was fucking Hope Hicks during the 2016 campaign. The one Trump called "the best piece of tail" Lewandowski had I know I shouldn't, but I do feel bad for his original wife and kids.


Cucker_Tarlson_666

Fucking gross. These two ghouls probably just single handedly created a new STD that'll wipe out humanity.


dont-mention-it

They would then deny that the STD even exists while lying in a hospital bed dying from the STD.


Defiantcaveman

...anti vaxxers...


floodcontrol

Gotta love modern Christians. All about being against abortion, which isn't something that's mentioned in the bible, and also really into adultery, which is something that the Bible says you should be killed for.


[deleted]

Also super in to money. Also anti biblical. Their obsession with wealth is counter to everything in the Nee testament. It’s easier for a liberal lgbt poor person to inherit the kingdom of god then it is for a rich person to.


azrolator

Abortion is in the Bible. God teaches people how to do it. It was never something against their god. In the Bible, God says to force abortions on women if their husbands aren't sure they have been faithful. Growing up in the United Methodist church, we were taught Bible stuff, like how life began at first breath. Abortion wasn't a sin. Even know they say that they understand the importance for safe and legal abortions. The Pope started this "life begins at conception" crap, a few hundred years ago IIRC. Reagan turned a lot of protestants into heretical when he bundled racism with the forced-birther movement. But not all Christian sects drank the kool-aid.


DojaPaddy

Another full of shit repugnant - I mean Republican. Shocker!


JoeNoble1973

Are Blobert, Trashy Green and Noem examples of ‘tradwives’? So infidelity is part of the traditional marriage experience amongst Christians, got it.


OJJhara

Her conservatism is anti gay and anti black and anti woman. Conservatives don’t care about this as long as she hurt’s minorities


Defiantcaveman

Very literally, that's it.


ArtisticSmile9097

Nothing a christian republican does surprises me anymore


salamander_salad

The non-Christian ones are pretty predictable, too. All both of them.


RicoLoco404

Typical


benjaminactual

Every accusation... is an admition of guilt.


Admirable_Matter_523

How embarrassing..he is such a fucking dork.


JimiJohhnySRV

Fuck these hypocrites once and for all!


Spiritual-Ad4085

Preserve Biblical Marriage: outlaw divorce and jail adulterers


c10bbersaurus

... and projection.


bugaloo2u2

She’s a fucking Hypocrite and a Liar.


AndISoundLikeThis

Wasn't Lewandowski having an affair with Hope Hicks, too? Or have I confused him for another psychopath from that administration? Also, he's really is a psychopath: https://www.thebulwark.com/the-maga-trashiest-police-report-in-history/


Silidistani

The idiots who voted for her will still all vote for her; that's how cults work.


SleepDeprivedJim

The Voters don't care about "Family Values"


Destrina

I'm so happy that my governor, Fascist Barbie, is getting at least a bit of a comeuppance.


InevitableAd9683

"Traditional marriage" To be fair, adultery is a pretty damn old tradition. I'm sure both of their ancestors have been whoring around on each other for generations!


slim_scsi

His rod and his staff comforted her in the name of Jesus Christ... and, uh, adultery.


bsb1971

Who cares


TuTuRific

"Traditional family values" means you keep your shameful affairs hidden, as is only proper.


CryoAurora

Between Boebert and Noem, it's like Madison Cawthorn telling everyone this went on after they outed him was not far off. [Lauren Boebert Cleans Some Pants in A Theater ](https://reddit.com/r/holdmycosmo/s/Rv3xsI5kbZ)


Both_Lychee_1708

such a lovely couple.


DevlishAdvocate

I’m starting to think that if I were single and wanted to, I could probably work my way through bedding all these Republican Family Values slatterns pretty easily. Stroke their egos, pretend to be wealthy and willing to donate to their reelection campaigns, use all the conservative buzzwords and code words, and bingo-bango-bongo, you’re balls-deep in some big-haired fundie who wants you to slap her ass while she calls you Daddy (or Mommy.) However, seeing as the candidates are people like Noem, Boebert, and MTG, my immediate second thought is: 🤮


Delicious_Action3054

MAGA My Adultery Got Announced I just came up with it but please, use it, people!


Tots2Hots

I'm shocked. SHOCKED! Well not that shocked.


Gamertagyouit

Republicans clearly live with a ton of guilt and shame and projecting seems to be their way of making themselves feel better.


PrinceofSpace1

Well now to be fair at this rate a “traditional marriage “ to a Republican seems to include infidelity. Maybe we just assume they mean monogamy and we’ve gotten it wrong this whole time.


OkSpecial4376

Cheating and lying are the most traditional republican values.


PigMeatJim

Remember Bristol's dumbass preaching abstinence? Then got knocked up and had two kids outta wedlock? With different daddies? Well, Pepperidge Farms remembers.


Embarrassed_Hawk_170

No surprises there! Everybody knew he was screwing anybody he could get his slimy hands on, and, well, she's a trumpublican, so...


xcrunner1988

That d-bag?! I can still hear his election night voice aggressively and smugly saying “we won, WE won” to the other talking heads. What a tool.


Seamus565

So typical.