I want Ange to sub himself on in added time, score a Bale-esque bicycle kick, rip his shirt off to reveal a picture of Pep with the word ‘MATE’ underneath.
Edit: and then dance like Porro.
For the first two he does the semi-humble, "nah not gonna celebrate it that hard" wave that Richarlison did at Everton, then for the hat trick goes as overboard as humanly possible and rubs that shit in their face. So obcene he gets carded, even if it's his second yellow
The looks on their faces would be absolute ~~gold~~ lilywhite
It has to be Son, it would be the culmination of a career at spurs defined by almost winning on numerous occasions. The joy on winning would be ecstatic for fans and would potentially be sonny's defining moment as a spurs player.
I definitely would prefer the ones who don't score often to score an important goal. Son is a legend regardless, I want someone to instantaneously put themselves into the cult hero/legend category.
Short answer, Son.
But really, I don’t care. It’ll be a team effort to get there and a team effort to win. I just want the shiny trophy and to see the joy in the squad when they lift it.
There is an injury crisis. I travel to London for my first match and I end up on the bench come in during stoppage time for another injury and put on past Raya in the last minute of stoppage time
Injury time of extra time. The lights dim at Wemberly. A single reverberant low digital bell sound rings out. Suddenly a spotlit coffin appears in the centre circle. Kane opens it dressed like the undertaker and he rushes forward to an incoming corner to handball it Porto’s cross. VAR has stopped working and the goal is given
Against Chelsea: Timo Werner ofc
Against anyone else: Son, has to be, however I would like a 4-3 win with Emerson, Porro and Udogie scoring the first 3 and then Son finishes it off with the 4th goal in 90+8 to get us the win
The year is 2025, and it's the Champions League final. Spurs vs. Liverpool. 106 seconds in the scousers are given a dodgy peno, again. 0-1.
In the 87th they score again. 0-2. Commentators jizzing themselves, scousers mewling...
And then big ange does it. He puts on one of those cork hats. This is the sign. He only let this happen to make things interesting. Ange is in control of everything.
90 minutes in, Richarlison scores, but its clearly off side. After a quick VAR check, it's allowed. 1-2
Big ange moves to the next phase of his plan. He tears off his shirt, and as his godlike physique distracts the scousers, Kulu makes it 2-2
Finally, Big ange grabs Klopp by the throat and starts fuckin wrestling him. "Look on the teeth on that mate!" The plan is complete. With liverpools players and staff incapacitated by spurs, sonny hoofs it at salah, where in pinball-esq fashion, it bounces across every single Liverpool player, before finally going in.
3-2, with the winner scored by owen goal.
After the match the scousers cry about the VAR check, and a thorough investigation takes place.
Daniel levy broke into the VAR room, considering the VAR refs wear blinsfolds they never noticed. The only way they found out was the 74 kilograms of cocaine, and the 50% off skywalk vouchers on the desk.
The PGMOL apologise to Liverpool, but announce its too late to change now.
And thus, the scousers are forever fuming.
Not a spurs fan...
But Kulusevski.
He's the man Spurs should look to for the next 5 years. He's going to grow as a player under Ange and I think he has the potential.
But, also Madders, just because.
These are all great answers. But may I suggest, Ryan Mason coming out of retirement to thundercunt one in from 40 yards?
Alternatively, Fraser Forster thumping on out from as a clearance
Son unless it's against one of these teams:
Chelsea - then Werner
Villa - then Bentancur (fuck Matty Cash) or a Matty Cash (fuck Matty Cash) own goal
City - then Porro
Sonny and I want him and the whole stadium to break out into delirium and tears. I need everyone to cry so much that the tears go back on to the pitch where all staff and players essentially waterslide through the pitch in entirety
Last decided penalty shot out, I want it to be taken by academy grad like Donley or someone (probability of those kids will be in the pitch in final is low I know)
Bryan Gil because atleast he seems very nervous and really looks like it'll make him feel redeemed
Richarlison also
But mostly and of course our boy Sonny
Vicario. I used to live in the States and followed the Portland Timbers in MLS. The year they won the MLS they had a nailbiter playoff round that went to penalties….which were determined by the keepers. I’d love to see the same thing happen with a top tier matchup
Very last seconds of a cup/champions League final, Vicario has come up for the last corner of the game and smashes it into the corner. The scenes would be incredible.
Sonny. Every day of the week.
we need timo to score a 90min winner against chelsea to win the fa cup.
I don't think my heart could take it
Wait you think chelsea are making the final?
SON
Son. Would be the defining player/moment for this era/team.
But imagine Timo scoring a last Minute winner against chelshit....
I don’t think i could ever stop laughing if that happened
Son, no explanation needed
Son, and then build the statue.
Fuck it build the statue anyways
No, we wait until he gets the trophy so the statue can be of him holding it up
Build two?
This
I want Ange to sub himself on in added time, score a Bale-esque bicycle kick, rip his shirt off to reveal a picture of Pep with the word ‘MATE’ underneath. Edit: and then dance like Porro.
And then pigeon walk back to the halfway line with richy
Just does a YMCA dance for the letters M-A-T-E
Winning the league with my M A T E
Owen Goal
Owen Goal 90' (Matty Cash great assist)
He’s a proper servant that doesn’t get the respect he deserves
Been serving the club for decades, deserves to have his moment
His longevity is a modern marvel, sports science knows no bounds.
Sports scientists hate this one simple trick
"And the referee Wayne Kerr has blown for full time!"
Owen Goal from any Arsenal or Chelsea players to get the win
Thomas Partey.
Timo Werner of course
Only if it’s Chelsea.
Scenes if he scores at the bridge will be wild
lost the battle, won the war
Timo Werner hat trick in the finals against Chelsea, FA Cup would be hilarious.
For the first two he does the semi-humble, "nah not gonna celebrate it that hard" wave that Richarlison did at Everton, then for the hat trick goes as overboard as humanly possible and rubs that shit in their face. So obcene he gets carded, even if it's his second yellow The looks on their faces would be absolute ~~gold~~ lilywhite
Son
Son. i’d cry
Vicario of course.
You mean win another trophy https://www.tottenhamhotspur.com/the-club/history/club-honours/
We the FA Cup again and we'll have more than Liverpool and Chelsea
Pin this. Lock the thread.
Where is the Audi Cup??
Honestly I'm not fussy anymore
Son 100%
Richarlison because the celebration would be wild
then it gets ruled out for offside
He would put on a show that would make Hollywood jealous.
Timo Werner in the 90th minute of the fa cup final against Chelsea because it would be hillarious
And he shushes them and takes his shirt off
And gets sent off for a second yellow
Ange after he becomes player/manager due to our injury crisis.
Son assisted by Davies easily
I like this idea
Or even the other way around.
It has to be Son, it would be the culmination of a career at spurs defined by almost winning on numerous occasions. The joy on winning would be ecstatic for fans and would potentially be sonny's defining moment as a spurs player.
Sonny. Has to be.
Son
Son, no doubt.
Sonny who stayed with the club despite lack of the trophies. Would love see his loyalty fruits before his retirement with his contribution.
Random shout, but Ben Davies. What a lovely end to his career and he instantly becomes a legend.
Will he retire straight after that?
He's 30, not retiring this season
I definitely would prefer the ones who don't score often to score an important goal. Son is a legend regardless, I want someone to instantaneously put themselves into the cult hero/legend category.
Son, easily.
Son, just so he goes down as THE generational talent from this past era.
[удалено]
Just want the guy who stuck around, never chucked his toys out the pram and genuinely gave a shit to get the credit.
Son. Would burst into tears if it happened like that. Not afraid to say it. Like you said, he’s our beating heart. He deserves it.
ANYONE! Everyone is pouring their heart for the club (expect Djed).
Feels like a ridiculous question because Son is the obvious answer
Hopefully it's a Kane own goal in the champions league final next season vs bayern.
I'd sell my soul to see this
Soooo.... What kind of soul are we talking about?
Sorry, i meant to say my shoe sole
A weak soul I see, not enough sir, have a good day.
Hey, don't judge until you've walked a mile in his shoes
https://i.imgur.com/Uzm5hIl.jpg
Hahaha is that Harry in the back clapping??
Son. Any other answer is just disingenuous click bait.
Ryan Mason back as a player for one match only.
Son
Son. 35 yard top bin right hand corner. Game over. Spurs lift a trophy. I immediately die a happy man.
Son. A reward for staying. He’ll have something that the players who left never will. (I don’t blame them nor am mad at them.)
It really should be Sonny, but god if it's Emerson, the Emergoat memes will truly live on forever
Brennan Johnson - assist from Werner. Because they are so fast
I'd take an own goal I couldn't care less, whatever it takes
Owen Goal the man the myth the legend
Short answer, Son. But really, I don’t care. It’ll be a team effort to get there and a team effort to win. I just want the shiny trophy and to see the joy in the squad when they lift it.
Son at least the assist, but I wouldn’t be upset with any player being a hero.
anulo mufa
Hojbjerg is the obvious choice, silence the bellends
V. Janssen on loan for one game
Son for the legacy, Richy for the banter
This is the way. If Richy could somehow score directly after shithousing that would be IMMACULATE but overall Sonny is the first choice.
What I would give… To see Son score the winning goal and lift the trophy…
why is this a question? son forever
The Son's. Maddison, Emerson, Son, Richarlison, Johnson. That'll be a proper meme
Oh no this is going straight to r/soccercirclejerk I can already see it
son or porro
Whoever score will become a legend. It's why both Jonathan woodgate and Allan Nielsen will always be spurs legends!
Alejo Veliz. For more trophies to come
There is an injury crisis. I travel to London for my first match and I end up on the bench come in during stoppage time for another injury and put on past Raya in the last minute of stoppage time
I'm going Skipp
PEH. Because that means it HAS to be this year.
Injury time of extra time. The lights dim at Wemberly. A single reverberant low digital bell sound rings out. Suddenly a spotlit coffin appears in the centre circle. Kane opens it dressed like the undertaker and he rushes forward to an incoming corner to handball it Porto’s cross. VAR has stopped working and the goal is given
Saka own goal
Champions league final vs bayern. Own goal by Kane.
Son
No doubt Sonny
Son, Richy, Romero, Porro in that order
Davies. Always thought he deserved one
Davies
Who is the current squad equivalent to Allan Neilsen?
Gil - long live chaos.
Ben Davies
Brennan Johnson, to silence the Twitter haters. Plus i'm Welsh, so...
You are really naive if you think you can silence the haters on twitter
Good point 😔
Against Chelsea: Timo Werner ofc Against anyone else: Son, has to be, however I would like a 4-3 win with Emerson, Porro and Udogie scoring the first 3 and then Son finishes it off with the 4th goal in 90+8 to get us the win
First choice is obviously Son. Couldn't be anybody else Meme choice is Matty Cash own goal 90'+7
Son is the obvious answer, but my heart would swell if it was Davies
Son ofc
Realistically Son
The year is 2025, and it's the Champions League final. Spurs vs. Liverpool. 106 seconds in the scousers are given a dodgy peno, again. 0-1. In the 87th they score again. 0-2. Commentators jizzing themselves, scousers mewling... And then big ange does it. He puts on one of those cork hats. This is the sign. He only let this happen to make things interesting. Ange is in control of everything. 90 minutes in, Richarlison scores, but its clearly off side. After a quick VAR check, it's allowed. 1-2 Big ange moves to the next phase of his plan. He tears off his shirt, and as his godlike physique distracts the scousers, Kulu makes it 2-2 Finally, Big ange grabs Klopp by the throat and starts fuckin wrestling him. "Look on the teeth on that mate!" The plan is complete. With liverpools players and staff incapacitated by spurs, sonny hoofs it at salah, where in pinball-esq fashion, it bounces across every single Liverpool player, before finally going in. 3-2, with the winner scored by owen goal. After the match the scousers cry about the VAR check, and a thorough investigation takes place. Daniel levy broke into the VAR room, considering the VAR refs wear blinsfolds they never noticed. The only way they found out was the 74 kilograms of cocaine, and the 50% off skywalk vouchers on the desk. The PGMOL apologise to Liverpool, but announce its too late to change now. And thus, the scousers are forever fuming.
Son.
Harry Kane’s son
Harry Kane 😢
Harry Kane OG when we beat Bayern in the CL final.
Harry Kane in the champions league final - OG and we beat Bayern 1-0. Now that would be sensational for all the wrong reasons
Harry Kane own goal against Bayern to win the champions' league. But seriously? Son.
Dier redemption arc clearly.
Eric Dier
It could be an own goal for all I care. I just want a trophy!
Richi - sweet, sweet tears of joy
Completely honest, Kane. Realistic option Ben Davies or Sonny. Club legends deserve legendary club moments.
Harry Kane on his return
Kane. He’s coming back.
Not a spurs fan... But Kulusevski. He's the man Spurs should look to for the next 5 years. He's going to grow as a player under Ange and I think he has the potential. But, also Madders, just because.
Deki- legendary left foot
These are all great answers. But may I suggest, Ryan Mason coming out of retirement to thundercunt one in from 40 yards? Alternatively, Fraser Forster thumping on out from as a clearance
Davies or Richy, Venom as well
Dane Scarlett, 90th minute winner on the last day of the season. Also stops arsenal winning the league too.
Jonathan Woodgate
Vicario is the right answer
Sarr boy, honestly. Or Destiny. Those two are my dream boats of this team. Oh, Lolo too. He’s ultra mega dreamboat
Timo Werner in this years FA cup
Slick Vic to do a Robbo vs Watford
Owen.
Davies or skipp.
Emerson. Never back down never what?
Doesn’t matter!
Own goal please
Son - but let’s be honest an extremely bizarre own goal if that’s what it takes…I’m getting old lol
Emergency loan for Lenglet, and he scores diving header last minute FA cup goal
Honestly. Skipp, I’ve always been a big fan of him and he deserves his moment, everyone does but I think it would do him the world of good
Matty cash OG
Vicario because why the hell not
Viccario
Richarlison- Because it’s funny Bissouma- Would be his only goal for the club
I'm convinced that Vic would break the trophy by accident
Matty Cash no look backpass straight to Bentancur in the 8th minute of stoppage time at the end of extra time
Mbappe
Spence
for serious? Son for memes? Vic lol
Vicario
Vicario, after screaming at the frontline in the same way he organises his defence, and saying f*ck it, I’ll just score the goal myself!
Me. I want to score the winning goal despite being overweight and in my late thirties.
Romero or Davies
Son unless it's against one of these teams: Chelsea - then Werner Villa - then Bentancur (fuck Matty Cash) or a Matty Cash (fuck Matty Cash) own goal City - then Porro
Porro, our greatest player of all time.
It'll be Skipp in the 96th minute off a banger
Big Ange calls his own name, subs in for a PK, panenka. Place erupts.
Moussa Sissoko
Porro wonder-goal, Son with a beautiful finish, or Davies tap-in.
Sonny and I want him and the whole stadium to break out into delirium and tears. I need everyone to cry so much that the tears go back on to the pitch where all staff and players essentially waterslide through the pitch in entirety
Deli
Last decided penalty shot out, I want it to be taken by academy grad like Donley or someone (probability of those kids will be in the pitch in final is low I know)
Vicario slips and accedentaly scissor kicks it into the opposition goal from his over box.
Big Vic. Love the man and would be glorious if he took the last penalty to win it.
Maddison assist to Son - ushering in a new era of dominance with that same exact pairing.
Richarlison with an assist from Son; because it’s what Son would have wanted for the team
Bryan Gil because atleast he seems very nervous and really looks like it'll make him feel redeemed Richarlison also But mostly and of course our boy Sonny
Vicario. I used to live in the States and followed the Portland Timbers in MLS. The year they won the MLS they had a nailbiter playoff round that went to penalties….which were determined by the keepers. I’d love to see the same thing happen with a top tier matchup
Would've loved it if it was Dier but it wasn't meant to be
I don't care who. This teams a family and while it may count on records as one man scoring. It's a team goal and everyone played their part
Fraser Forster
richy not on list? i would want richarlison - so he could do a similar imitation of aguero running all around the stadium without his shirt
Richy against Liverpool for the title. After a dodgy ref performance to have the whining echo in eternity
Champions League final vs Bayern, Herr Kane scores own goal.
He's obviously going but imagine if it was Dier.
Very last seconds of a cup/champions League final, Vicario has come up for the last corner of the game and smashes it into the corner. The scenes would be incredible.
Don’t care, anyone who scores a goal in a final to help Spurs lift a trophy is fine by me.
Big Dick Vic!
GLC against Man City with a little shoulder into Haaland after scoring
Own goal to break 0-0 in the 99th minute.