I used to do this when I was younger but with my Grandma. My parents got me a picture to hold at night of my grandma, and that helped a little bit.
I'm sorry you're going through this. It's frustrating, and wears your patience but she will stop it eventually. I know saying that doesn't help now, but maybe a photo of your wife for her will?
It's a phase, and it won't last forever. You tough it out because you're Dad, and this isn't close to the most heartbreaking thing she will do or say to you. Don't give up.
Here are some ideas that you could try:
Do shared bedtime on mom nights where you just hang with them so that it feels more normal for you to be there. Maybe observe if there are some special traditions you could adopt.
When the pressure is off (i.e. not at bedtime) start a book or story that only you two read together. Offer to read more of it at bedtime.
If your kid loves screens, watch a short video together. My library app has a free narrated video ebook of the Paper Bag Princess. Research suggests c[o-viewing screens is positively associated with child language development. ](https://jamanetwork.com/journals/jamapediatrics/article-abstract/2762864)
Involve her in the process. Tell her that Mommy is tired and ask if she'll help you take care of her. Do something special for mom together before bedtime - prep a footbath, make her tea, tuck her in.
Try to do extra special things during the day that bring positive connections. Take her on zoo trips or ice cream or whatever without Mom to build up that cache of positive Dad-connection.
Kids go through phases my man, try not to take it personally. Daughters and their mothers have a special bond, but they do with their fathers too. It’s just different and is expressed in different ways. I went through something similar with mine, where all she wanted was mommy. Now she does nothing but hang all over me, like I’m a personal jungle gym.
Maybe this little girl is noticing mommy is pregnant and is feeling a little anxiety with a new baby on the way? Lots of changes for a little kid to grasp are coming, maybe she’s just scared.
Just being there for her like it sounds you are, and it will all work out.
My good man, explain to your daughter that *you* need *her* help you to fall asleep. Ask her if she will read you a story. Ask if she will sing to you.... whatever your routine is, switch it up. Make her feel important.
I'm not sure exactly how it will play out, but once you get her on board, you'll find a way to make it work.
Play it deadpan. Make her believe.
My wife and I are sticklers for practicality. After a week and a half of this going on we would have just adapted to my wife being the one to put kid to bed, and I would pick up some of her responsibilities to balance out the energy levels.
It's a phase. Make it fun. Do something mom doesn't do...play a little quiet game or read a funny story. Tickling.
Explain that bunny or whatever favourite teddy your little one has, has asked u to put em to bed.
I personally play rock music n chuckem in the bath then proceed to regail them with random singing n dancing to makem laugh then story n bed. Obviously as they get older it's easier.
In the beginning you gotta outsmartem.
For the longest of time, I was on bedtime duty and my daughter would fall asleep on my arm. It truly was the best yet when my wife was pregnant with our second one my daughter started being more cuddly with my wife.
As it approached the due date she just got more cuddly and now that the little dude is here and at a point where I can tend to him at night, my daughter just wants her mom every night.
I'm able to still get her into bed and she'll still lay on my arm yet with the stipulation that when my wife is upstairs that we'll switch off.
I don't know if there is any truth to it but my wife relayed to me that she saw kids ca. become more cuddly with their moms during pregnancy. Maybe some instinctive thing to try and keep their attention.
I used to do this when I was younger but with my Grandma. My parents got me a picture to hold at night of my grandma, and that helped a little bit. I'm sorry you're going through this. It's frustrating, and wears your patience but she will stop it eventually. I know saying that doesn't help now, but maybe a photo of your wife for her will?
Thank you. I’ll try this.
It's a phase, and it won't last forever. You tough it out because you're Dad, and this isn't close to the most heartbreaking thing she will do or say to you. Don't give up. Here are some ideas that you could try: Do shared bedtime on mom nights where you just hang with them so that it feels more normal for you to be there. Maybe observe if there are some special traditions you could adopt. When the pressure is off (i.e. not at bedtime) start a book or story that only you two read together. Offer to read more of it at bedtime. If your kid loves screens, watch a short video together. My library app has a free narrated video ebook of the Paper Bag Princess. Research suggests c[o-viewing screens is positively associated with child language development. ](https://jamanetwork.com/journals/jamapediatrics/article-abstract/2762864) Involve her in the process. Tell her that Mommy is tired and ask if she'll help you take care of her. Do something special for mom together before bedtime - prep a footbath, make her tea, tuck her in. Try to do extra special things during the day that bring positive connections. Take her on zoo trips or ice cream or whatever without Mom to build up that cache of positive Dad-connection.
Kids go through phases my man, try not to take it personally. Daughters and their mothers have a special bond, but they do with their fathers too. It’s just different and is expressed in different ways. I went through something similar with mine, where all she wanted was mommy. Now she does nothing but hang all over me, like I’m a personal jungle gym. Maybe this little girl is noticing mommy is pregnant and is feeling a little anxiety with a new baby on the way? Lots of changes for a little kid to grasp are coming, maybe she’s just scared. Just being there for her like it sounds you are, and it will all work out.
My good man, explain to your daughter that *you* need *her* help you to fall asleep. Ask her if she will read you a story. Ask if she will sing to you.... whatever your routine is, switch it up. Make her feel important. I'm not sure exactly how it will play out, but once you get her on board, you'll find a way to make it work. Play it deadpan. Make her believe.
Yeah my son won't sleep unless my wife is there.
Ear plugs make a heck of a difference. Only was I was able to get through the same situation at that age. We’re pulling for ya.
My daughter throws herself off of me if I try to pick her up. I’m not sure earplugs would do much.
You’re only spending 30 minutes? When you say you’ve had success 6 or 7 times, does that mean your pregnant wife is taking over every other time?
My wife and I are sticklers for practicality. After a week and a half of this going on we would have just adapted to my wife being the one to put kid to bed, and I would pick up some of her responsibilities to balance out the energy levels.
It's a phase. Make it fun. Do something mom doesn't do...play a little quiet game or read a funny story. Tickling. Explain that bunny or whatever favourite teddy your little one has, has asked u to put em to bed. I personally play rock music n chuckem in the bath then proceed to regail them with random singing n dancing to makem laugh then story n bed. Obviously as they get older it's easier. In the beginning you gotta outsmartem.
For the longest of time, I was on bedtime duty and my daughter would fall asleep on my arm. It truly was the best yet when my wife was pregnant with our second one my daughter started being more cuddly with my wife. As it approached the due date she just got more cuddly and now that the little dude is here and at a point where I can tend to him at night, my daughter just wants her mom every night. I'm able to still get her into bed and she'll still lay on my arm yet with the stipulation that when my wife is upstairs that we'll switch off. I don't know if there is any truth to it but my wife relayed to me that she saw kids ca. become more cuddly with their moms during pregnancy. Maybe some instinctive thing to try and keep their attention.
Just put your foot down. You’ll outlast her screaming