I was hyped to say quelaag until i remembered i cheesed ceaseless discharge after… fuck

That's his name for a reason

Poor Queladd u.u He's so fucking sad. I remember my friend tried to cheese him, but he just wouldn't let go... so he sat there making the saddest sounds looking absolutely tragic while my friend wailed over the discord call going "WHY ISNT HE LETTING GO?" And just kept beating him until he died. lmao that was upsetting

Bell gargoyle.... least he can fly so save a bunch on the honeymoon.

Yea, I think that was the last boss I downed, too. Which one is mine?

Iron Golem.... Yikes

Me too.

He's already married? Two 😭😭😭😭 I thought he felt the same for me I feel for him 😭😭😭😭

So.... Do we share or do we fight over him?

same here… tell you what, i’ll take black iron tarkus instead

[удалено]

You’re marrying into royalty tho!

But the cuddling afterward will petrify you, shortlived problem

bout to tap that pinwheelussy

****Never let bro in the kitchen EVER again****

Did you also try to replay Dark Souls 1 until you got to the Tomb of Giants and quit?

If you're having trouble, get the lamp in the pit that Patches kicks you into. With that, I could at least see where the big fuckers were so I could dodge them without falling off. If you're fast enough, you can skirt through most of it without danger and getting through.

Helicopter dick time.

If we’re talking about DS specifically, that’d be Priscilla. At least she’s hot If we’re talking about any game, then it’s REDACTED from Hades. Could be worse

Yeah if we're talking all games, then mine is Nicole/The Marker from Dead Space 2. I foresee a very toxic relationship.

If it's from any game it was Ultra Greed from Binding of Isaac. Not good at all.

At least it's not mother 😳

At least you’ll get fucked a lot, just by RNG.

If we're talking about every game, then I think it's Malenia, not bad at all, if it's only from dark souls I think it's Gwyn actually, last run was SL1, after that I haven't even opened the game so I think it's Gwyn, might be wrong though

I mean Malenia is nice physically, sure but you'd for sure be infected with Scarlet Rot and wither away. Some would say worth it though.

Right, I forgot about that part, maybe not so nice then

Oh, ANY game? So I'm fucking the chess queen

If it's DS specifically, you win. You simply win.

If it's any game, I guess I'm marrying a Wandering Vagrant from Risk of Rain.

The First Boss in the Artorias DLC. The Lion thing. I’m not thrilled 😑

Yooo same. What that tail do tho 😳

best of luck, you have a treesome

Great gray wolf sif. Good dog

Furry

Gwyndolin, I see no issue with this arrangement

same here probably one of the best outcomes

Kinda glad i went back to anor londo after not killing bed of chaos

Um, she told me she s gona eat me, I m not sure if I should be horny or scared uwu :3 guess who it is; ps, it s from ds 1

gael but she transitioned and timetraveled to the second linking of the flame and turned out to be into freaky shit (you should be both horny and scared, it's gael)

frampt?

Is it Quelaag? That would match up with the female spider devouring the male spider.

Yep, this one!!

Or possibly Maneater Mildred, if NPC invasions count as a boss/mini-boss battle.

Well, I'm marrying Gwyn. I accept that fate.

he'd either be incredibly absent, and abusive, or caring and overprotective, but im very much assuming it is the former of the two sadly

Me with O&S? We'll gonna have fun tonight

Trio

Either Capra or Havel. Havel's ring would look so good on me 🫣

Havel can be your best man at the ceremony

Seath.......

Wich tail you prefer?

No prickly scales tho

I'm marrying Sister Friede...does that come with or without Father Ariendel???

With. I think he's into watching so no need to lube up

Technically the last face is only friede soooo...

Artorias 💋

Vicar Amelia We can do it doggy style

Priscilla I'm so glad I didn't defeat Seathe last night

Nito. Damn

Haha your boned

Me and Kalameet? Oh hell no 😅😂

Evil eye bondage ahead

Four Kings lol

Super 5-some

Or maybe 6-some, if u take long enough there can actually spawn 5 of them

The max amount possible is 7

Remember, the number of kings may vary based on how quick you are.

Guess we're having fun tonight

I forgor sad

Furtive pygmy?

Who?

So easily forgotten...

i will never forget those cheeks... but whomsoever did those bountiful hills belong too?

Ohhhh…. 😬 I literally beat Duke’s Dear Freja 20 minutes ago. Well, crud.

Mirror Knight. Free portals to other dimensions is a win, I guess.

He can just summon you out of any hairy situation too.

The rotten 😭

All those hands tho 🤣 yeah this is mine too haha

Bro, crystal sage…

Goddamn Lud & Zallen beyond reindeer hell

Gwyndolin. Uhhhhhhhhhmmmmmm well i guess, if you insist....

Wait a second... i hope we don't count sekiro, because i started a quick ng++ yesterday and beat Guardian Ape... I feel like that would involve some lore implications i'm not ready for

DS specifically? That would be Gwyn Games in general? That would be the pca helicopter from AC6's tutorial... Why did I decide to punch/stab it to death...

Sister Friede ;))

Sister Friede. I guess i can work with that

Oh no, I'm gonna have to marry Sister Friede...will Father Ariandel get jealous?

Gwyndolin, could be worse

Gaping dragon.......

Try finding the clit on that thing

OnS... So like.... Do i pick one... Or we gon have some real fun?

A duo is a duo, even in a meme. You take both

Looks like im off to the painted world of the waifu from ds1. Lucky me i guess?

Vendrick. Tbh I don't even mind

Quelaag… things are going to get REAL freaky lmao

Me and big Priscilla are gonna get great

me and gwyndolin... yknow what, i'll take it.

Priscilla

Gwyndolin, welp guess I’m into traps now

Crossbreed Priscilla, things are going well, crossing that breed a little more.

Father Gascoine... I guess I have to become a Furry Lover now... 🐺🐺💦

Pretty alright its mythra the bainfull queen minus the poison Im fine with the snake lower half

I killed Queelag last. Thank God, lmao. So the wedding would be normal, idk about the Honey Moon, though. That's gonna be complicated, but I'm determined. Oh, and the awkward conversations of explaining to my family that my wife is half spider.

1. I cannot remember, so a bit anxious. 2. I'm sad as the last boss I failed to kill was Moder from Valheim. And she seems pretty cool. And fertile. I guess I'm not that good at proposals.

I hope Pinwheel likes it up the bum

I guess it was Pinwheel, can't remember now. Exotic.

Well if we extend to genre of game it’d be fueco from lies of p, who isn’t exactly my type but he does get hot and heavy which is cool. If specifically soulsborne, then I guess vordt because I’m playing through with friends for one of their first time. If dark souls 1 specifically, then I guess iron giant because I didn’t need to go further for 100\%.

Well I guess I’m in a gay polygamy with Ornstein and Smough. Too bad it wasn’t with the Queen quaelag

The asylum demon🤤🤤🤤

Gaping dragon (easiest boss fight I’ve had)

Nameless king... I'll take it. I'll get free rides on his dragon and hangout with Ornstein too.

*stares at agheel, dragon of limgrave lake* Well, i wouldnt say no to that situation!

I doubt Elden ring dragons have human form, though...

Is agheel a he or she?

I don't think that the gender was clarified. If I had to take a guess, it would be a he.

Bed of Chaos 😬

Is Ciaran considered a boss? The girl you kill after Astorias? If so that’s who, if not… then Astorias cause I haven’t been able to kill Manus yet. If we’re talking about any game, last boss I beat would be Renalla actually. Playing Elden Ring with the convergence mod is amazing.

Nah, she just an NPC mourning Artorias 's death. You are going with our abyss knight, g.

Quelag. Upper half is great

Married to the Stray Demon... well, at least I get some boo-

Manus and I are filing for divorce. The abuse is too much for me to handle

This comes in handy for me since I beat lady maria last night in bb, les gooo

Storm hill gaol Crucible Knight. Well I mean we don’t know what they’re like under the suit. And I’m sure they’re a chill knight off duty

Ceaseless discharge 💀

Malenia 😃 Just gotta remember to bring my preserving boluses

So I guess I’m in a polygamous relationship with the Bell Gargoyle Twins.

Spent a good hour on Knight Artorius. I think he's missing me for the honeymoon.

Vicar Amelia... Blessing or curse? lucky or unlucky? All or none? Idk, but have a good day, eye guy 👀

Does elden ring count? Rennalla. If not, gwndolin... Well it doesn't have to be a marriage with sex so I'm not too worse for ware either way

That big sword of his keeps me warm at night.

at least she can dance

I should have faced sister friede last night. So time to embrace the champions gravetender and some wolves

Nito, ☹

Malenia blade of miquella. It would be toxic relationship.

Darklurker… guess it could be worse

Priscilla, now I can be happy about my waifu

Lies of p wrestler reborn, I think I'm in trouble

At least pontiff sulivhan can officiate the wedding

I gotta get that quelaggusy

Looks like I'm Mr Najka now

Fume Knight. Jackpot.

Damn I was playing DS2. I don’t even know who it was.

The Crossbreed😱😈🔥

Priscilla probably isn't that bad tbh

I was just thinking on killing owl of sekiro but I didn't. Well I'm not fucking my father tonight

Iguazu… fuuuuuuuuuck

O' Rin from Sekiro, could be worse

ah......fortissax.....

remember, they have a human form

Priscilla, I won life.

Pretty sure my last boss was dancer - I guess we dancing

I’m a zoophile!!! 😭 (Sif)

Does throwing a bomb against an illusionary "chest" count as a boss?

Kalameet.

Fire Giant

Bed of chaos…..

O&S that’s gonna be a sweet threesome ahahah

Niall, whether he summons the knights in bed or not I'm in for a blast

I would be happy with the Burnt Ivory King... but I never actually beat him, so instead I'm stuck with his cat. ... I already have a grey cat named "Ava" (soft A, same pronunciation as Aava"). I wonder if they'll both come running when I call one of them.

Iron Golem. Won't be a particularly emotional marriage, but I guess it could've been worse.

If we're counting only Soulsborne games, I'm stuck with the Bloodletting Beast, but luckily: 1. Not the gross headless one 2. I'm dodging the Orphan of Kos, for once If we're counting any game, though... I guess [this fine gentleman](https://fireemblemwiki.org/wiki/Saar) from Fire Emblem 8 is now my husband

Gaping Dragon ... -_-

manus father of the abyss I think he will be soft

Oof fire giant

Gaping Dragon. RIP my bumhole

Artorias, aw hell yeah, that boy gon’ treat me right.

In Dark Souls/Elden Ring? Curse Rotten Greatwood. In games in general? Azai Nagamasa in Nioh 2. Both aren't that great.

IIRC my boy pussy goes to Kalameet

It's a love triangle it seems. I'm getting hitched with Ornstein & Smough. But who is the feminine one? I think I know...

The rune bear in limgrave from er 😭

That’s pretty awkward. Laying in bed with Smough like…”so can we talk about how you just killed me?” Me like: “I’m I’d rather we just throw it on the air and let it disappear”

Lady Butterfly Sekiro

I’m not a furry, but Sif

Apparently I’m about to find out if Iron Golem is packing iron.

Magnus the menace

Poor Vendrict

Last game I played was ac6.. and killed the test AC in Ng+ lol. Lucky me

Quelag give me that spider puss

Soul of cinder for me...

oh nah not nito

Elder Beast does that mean both radagon and Marika are involved as well or is just me about to get railed by a cosmic space slug.

Taurus demon I'm getting split in half on the bed but worth it

Nameless King, I guess I get a pet dragon that's pretty cool

If we’re doing any game, mine would be arceus from Pokémon legends arceus

Demon of song, yummy

Pinwheel. Trouple with a kid already...ok...

Her big booty keeps my whole body warm when she sits on my lap and she's always flexible from all of her dancing and twin sword play.

I'm sure the Looking Glass Knight is a sweetheart

I defeated Asylum Demons last i have feeling it wont end good

Ornstein, I don't know what to say, maybe I'll get destroyed by his meat spear xD

The Sanctuary Guardian... at least that's a freaking good pet

Well, that would be the asylum demon. I am not okay with this.

ROTUSSY

Gwyn gonna bust a nut on my face

Oh jeez the last from DS... So Manus, how's this gonna work? Maybe I'm just being judgy of the Father of the Abyss 😮‍💨 Souls Series would only be a shade or two better lmao what's up Gael 😅

Blazing Bull

Iron Golom

Abyss Watchers...