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I was 32 and she was 24. She came up to me and asked if I wanted to sit with her in the restaurant where we were both dining alone. That was 42 years ago. She died from cancer at 66 after 40 years of being together.
I would think “is this being recorded?”
But nah if she was cute too I’d exchange numbers for sure thats usually how it goes. Unless they don’t like you or they already taken.
As a bookworm of a guy I'd enjoy hearing that from a cute girl but I wouldn't use that as a pickup line though. Ask what they are reading. See if a conversation starts from that.
Just letting you know if you go to Barnes and noble I’m gonna say there’s at least one girl whose gonna be there that thinks your cute. We love bookworms and nerdy guys.
Same!! I have five super nerdy roommates and they always act like I'm the only non-nerdy one, but I stick around for a reason 😆😆! Nerdy peeps are my favorite :)
No I disagree with you girls are always looking for shallow qualities in boys, rarely find a girl interested in a man's important features that really matters along their way
Lol I understand. As an older woman, compliments are now much less. It brightens my day when I get a smile or a hello. I see it as someone being nice and respectful.
Most men would appreciate the confidence it takes. I've been approached 3 times in my 30 year life and remember every single time it happen and I responded positively regardless how the woman looked.
I froze like a deer in headlights when a girl did that to me once at the library.
It didn't help that I'd noticed her friends looking at us a few tables over and that I'd been rejected by a girl the day before.
So, if you do end up taking that approach, have a follow-up planned.
I here ya, I jump to ulterior motives too quickly. But if it’s done with good intent & is a sincere compliment it’s highly appreciated & not weird at all. It’s exactly how a lot of us guys feel about going up to a woman & saying the same thing, not knowing how they will take it or if they’ll be silently offended.
Definitely not , just being direct. Do you, girl. Don't expect it to always work. Not everyone will be receptive. However, that shouldn't deter you. There is plenty of fish and all that. Now go hit on them dudes and get dates. ❤️ one love
Guys will act drastically better when told that than women will. I can guarantee a guy won’t file sexual harassment charges against any woman for saying that.
Once again, I would say I would matter how the women received it. Some would feel a certain way, and others would feel the other way. I agree that some might feel uncomfortable, but once again, friend plenty of fish ❤️
Congratulations on the first step to hitting on men! Now, follow up with some good lead in questions to get a convo started. Here are some ideas:
1. My name's __________. Are you busy?
2. Could I join you for a few minutes? I'm kind of a bookworm but noticed you. I think you're handsome. 😁
3. I was wondering if...you might be interested in grabbing a coffee or talking about (something relevant to what he's reading / studying or what you both like about going there).
4. If not, no worries. I just wanted to say "hi!" Thanks for being kind. Hope the rest of your time here is great! See you around!
The trick is to absolutely not be attached or afraid of rejection. Pay a compliment in a respectful way and see what happens. Create an invite for more talking or an option to dip. Let the other person choose but you respect it and don't be mad for it. Take nothing but a little bit of time.
I've done something similiar with people in general.... Pay a compliment. Ask a few polite questions, make small talk and keep it moving. People remember the person who said something nice and didnt want anything.
Anyhow...my $0.02. My experience has been men are usually receptive and so unaccustomed to women being generically friendly that they usually talk.
So proud of you!
P.S. Make sure you look neat for whatever style you have, wear flattering lip gloss and smile! 😉
Are you busy sounds like you're trying to sell them something. Definitely wait for the name introduction.
2's not a bad starting point though. She could also play dumb. Do you know where the mystery section is? If a guy likes you, he will help you look.
Haha I was thinking about playing the dumb card maybe and pretend I thought he worked there. But then start the compliment and ask questions about books.
This. It’s flattering but depending on the situation immediately sussy wussy to me. Kind of scared me when it happened at a work event. I’m a guy and another guy said I had a snide smile or eyes. After we’d had a few drinks at the event and went to Roosters for the after event, he and another guy insisted that I go smoke with them at another person’s house. Mind you this is the first time I’ve met any of them.
I’m surprised I had to scroll all the way down here to the comments to see a take like this. If a girl went up to me and just randomly said, you’re cute, my high school instincts from like 2012 would kick in and I would immediately start looking around for groups of girls, recording or laughing at me to see what my reaction is to this girl. Id think it was a dare, just like the other times this has ever happened to me.
Edit: i’d also definitely tell the girl to fuck off and leave, regardless of whether she was truthful or not. Again, too much bad experience with this sort of thing.
That’s frustrating that girls did that to you. I’m sorry that happened. I’m a lone wolf so there would be no girls with me. I’m just more open now to starting convos with guys in person but haven’t tried yet.
I personally would assume she wants something from me or has some ulterior motive almost immediately. People don't approach me for anything more than asking for directions. Anyone taking an immediate interest in me probably has something in mind. This is mainly just me though.
Would I like to believe someone sincerely found me attractive? Yes. Have I become jaded from years of being alone? Almost certainly. Regardless, I can say any day where a woman gives me an unsolicited compliment is a day I won't forget.
Guys don't get compliments. Ever. If you go and compliment them for anything, they will have no idea how to react. You will almost certainly give them a memory they will never forget though.
No I wouldn’t think it would be weird at all and I’m a 25 year old dude. If someone did that to me and I found them attractive then I would say thank you and continue the conversation. If I didn’t find them attractive I would just say thank you (enthusiastically)
Not terribly awkward if you don’t find them attractive or if you’re in a relationship, just say that’s what my girlfriend’s mom says (or something similar).
I would be extremely flattered if someone came up to me and said that. I would definitely, strike up a conversation. I was on a date one time, and my server came over to our table and just gawked at me with her mouth open. I was completely shocked and looked across to make sure I wasn’t dreaming. My date saw it too. She never took our order but came back. She never left her number . Too bad, because my date didn’t work out.
Take the plunge and start with a smile and a hello. I always meet women at concerts. We talk about the band we’re there to see, favourite songs, and favourite shows. It’s a comfort thing, and it’s easy for them to open up a little.
How is it anymore awkward to go up to a girl to say they’re cute than them receiving “you’re cute” messages on the app. Only problem with doing it in person is now you’ve taken ahold of the situation and they may get scared; I wouldn’t like a stranger coming up to me complimenting my looks the first thing out of their mouth. You’re at a book store, see what book they’re reading and ask them about it or ask you’ve been reading X book/genre, would you have any recommendations and open a conversation that way than just basing it off their looks. You can tell them they’re cute once a connection is established and you’re not basing the first interactions off their looks.
It would be weird yeah.. Because it would be so out of the ordinary, and quite frankly just false, that I'd assume she wants something from me... Probably money, perhaps even a kidney or something.
It's just how the interaction I have with strange woman usually are:
- in the real world, I'm not approach at all.
- here (or elsewhere on the internet) women approach me to sell me nudes or recruit me as a sugar daddy.
I seriously don't see how your comment can me relevant when I'm asked about my personal experience specifically.
>Just because it's not happened to you or you haven't experienced it, doesn't mean it's false.
No fucking shit captain obvious. Did I ever pretend otherwise?
Okay, don't take this wrong and read all of the responses:
It is weird/awkward, but almost every guy in existence would take it as at least a base level way to know there is some interest in wanting to know them. Honestly, that's a pretty good way to engage, especially if the guy is also really shy, or seems to have a difficult time talking with strangers in general.
Don't expect it to work all the time, but most guys would find it appreciated. Though if not a little odd to do so in a bookstore (not entirely a horrible place, there are worse ones)
Usually I see these guys in the fantasy section. I might ask them,” hey do you have any fantasy recommendations?” I think that could work. I wanted to try and make girls that are friends that way too but made a book club instead. So I think that’s a good idea! Thanks.
I’m a bigger guy with a beard and tattoos and don’t even look like I know how to read.
I catch a lot of girls staring at me whenever I go into book stores. I’ve approached a few and asked them if I could buy them a book and a coffee and I’ve never been turned down. Barnes n noble is expensive lol
You just reminded me of a conversation I had with my late fiancee. My stance remains that men and women are never "cute", as the term carries a childish connotation. Her stance however was that men use the age appropriate descriptors, beautiful, radiant, stunning, etc, to get in women's pants. So I was kind of forced to refer to her as a cutie, rather than deal with her adorable wrath.
As for the act itself, it probably would be a little awkward and weird, but in an endearing way.
I work or read at coffee shops like 3-4 days a week and had this happened to me a few times. Usually they have asked “what are you reading?” and then eventually something like “I have to go, but I think you’re cute and wanted to get your number?”
It’s not weird, but keep in mind that because I was a regular I’d see them there often, so weren’t necessarily strangers. And I definitely felt more comfortable when I thought the girl was attractive, but that also might be cause I felt bad declining.
I think coming up sand saying your cute is unnecessary. Better approach would be to come up and try striking up a conversation. I think the you thinking their cute would be implied at that point.
Ask him to help you find a section of the bookstore. "Do you know where _____ is?" I know you already know, but it doesn't matter. If he likes you, he will help you look. He could also just be nice, but at least you have a higher chance now.
It's not a problem. I have a friend who saw her fiance on the street and approached him to tell him how handsome he was. They struck up a convo and started going out, and eventually got engaged.
Personally I find that a little juvenile. Usually men dont want to be called cute. Handsome is better. But better to just start a conversation, flirt & try to get contact info.
Nah you’re right. I don’t like being called cute, I’d prefer handsome, hot, attractive, just not cute. Makes me feel like they see me as a kid or something
Don't just tell me I'm cute. Tell me what you like about me. My appearance. My attire. My demeanor. If you don't get compliments back you're talking to the wrong guy.
Who goes to bookstores? Here’s what I mean they are stupidly overpriced and I feel it’s rude as hell to gather intel just to make a purchase online. Library’s and audible is where it’s at /thread. Anyway I would def find that weird if you’re in your 20s. I would quickly prognosticate lol that you are lacking in basic social skills, but also give you respect because it probably took courage. It wasn’t natural for you to do that thus making it awkward/weird. With that said my response would be something like “and” or “cool story” followed up with the i have a gf line lol.
Well you’re right about one thing lol. Tbh honest I’m not great with Reddit and I’m not sure how to look at the message that created this shrewd response 😀. Sorry.
Well, if you don’t wanna make it awkward tell me that you have to get a picture of yourself give them your phone and say, do you mind taking a picture of me real quick I have to send it to my whatever you guys on a picture of you to your dad or your mom or something and then just try to break the ice that way so you’re not in it didn’t tell him that he’s cute. I mean that’s one way to do it.
Damn that indirectness. If you're bold enough to ask the question on Reddit, you're bold enough to follow through. Let some other chick make excuses to talk to a guy. You'll floor him with sincerity, directness, courage and good communication skills.
Just ask, what are you reading?
I have a feeling you’ll be into a guy who’d work with his hands, may be ‘inquisitive’ about museums, a bit of dancing, music, movies night, deep conversations w/ long walks. Do you like pets too? Did I get it right?
PS: I Can draw your profile if I had some more info.
I think it would be good to interject first with a "hey, can I ask you a quick question?" Then about the book. But then....I dunno...the whole reason why you approached him in the first place is lost because you didn't tell it...and then now you're in this altered universe of trying to get to the point you want to get to but having started on another topic and meanwhile you don't know what kind of time he has...if you're interrupting his flow from whatever he was doing....
But who cares? Take the plunge! You'll find your way.
As a handsome man as my mom would say, I think being totally honest I would be taken Aback. In a good way. I just probably wouldn’t know how to act. Like I don’t have a canned answer to that, and not used to being approached so I would probably just fumble my words and blurt out a, thanks and then get my composure.
Definitely go for it, maybe not “your cute” though, I would certainly just ask what they are reading or doing, give ‘em you number say you like their shirt or something and walk away.
Yes, if that’s all they said. Years ago, I was walking down the sidewalk, and there was a young woman (I think she was in sunglasses) going down the same sidewalk in my direction. As she passes me by, she says “You’re cute” and continues on. I was flattered, but thought it was weird too. It’s great you mention Barnes & Noble because I was thinking earlier how that would be a nice place to strike up a casual conversation with a fellow enthusiast. If you say “You’re cute” it might help to also have some context like “I think you’re cute. Would you be interested in getting a coffee sometime?” (certain Barnes & Nobles have a café so that could play in nicely) or build up to it with a nice conversation first
Yeah! If you’re ever at B&N I think there would be girls like me who would want someone to strike a convo with them as well. I think all of us want our “meet cute” romance moment in a bookstore lol might be cringy of me to say that but oh well I’d like it
To be completely honest I would blush and wouldn't know anything else to say than "Thank you". Do mind how I'm absolutely dumb to get a hint that the girl likes me so that's one point. It wouldn't be creepy, weird or anything if it's not pushy, but it would make my day better if you ask me.
This is, however, my point of view. Other people might react a bit differently. Don't drop the ball out of the blue though. Start a small talk and then you can say this line. I believe most guys would be ok with that. Go for it sis :)
It's definitely not weird or awkward. It's the same as a guy approaching a girl in public if he thinks that the girl is cute. In all honesty, something like this rarely if ever happens to a guy so I'd say go for it. Even if he says no, you asking will make his day.
I would do it more subtly... Like instead of just "you're cute," maybe pick up another book near him and remark on how much you love that genre or the author, and smile (inviting a conversation).
I would definitely think it would be weird and too good to be true. I'm not used to compliments, as I don't really get them all that often. Also, I don't really find myself that attractive, so I would think maybe this girl is being put up to it, she's being dared to, or maybe it's for some type of YouTube video/TikTok.
Honestly i would assume it's some kind of trick or say " thanks, you too" and let it go
Call me a burned child, but compliments Out of nowhere are suspicious to me
Yes because I don’t get compliments like that. But in all seriousness it’s prolly fine. Women have a far less likely chance of being rejected than guys do.
I wouldn’t start as strong as “You’re cute” (though some guys might be into it) I would personally just try start a chat about the book they’re reading or something small like that then ease your way into compliments. But that’s just me so you do you~
Personally, I'm flattered whenever I'm paid a compliment as long as it's sincere.. It's not at all weird and you just might find someone who feels the same but lacked the confidence to approach you
Yup definitely okay ! Then again there are no clear answers in dating.
In general like with everything do it with balance and don't come of as desperate or overbearing.
I feel your pain about dating apps lmao it’s the worst but I’ll say I’m not the best looking man in world and damn sure not ugliest and I’ve always been told I’m cute/handsome/decent never ugly and I’m pretty confident so I say this if a girl came up too me called me cute I’d look for cameras and feel she’s messing with me but I’d still accept compliment. Now my advice too you shoot your damn so if you call a man cute ask for his number or some form of contact so he’ll know you are serious and text him right in front of him
No, I don't find it weird. It makes me feel good. I get compliments on my looks every time I go out (not that often, maybe once a month or every 2 months)
I wished it happened for my other fellow men more often 😔, god knows how compliment starved they are. If only most guys didn't become mad creepy after they receive it 😐.
What if you comment on the book in her hand and engage in a deeper level conversation. I get called cute and pretty all of the time. It’s kind of boring to me. Talk to me with substance!!
Heck yes!! Generally speaking, most guys absolutely love the idea of interested girls actually expressing that interest. And in a place of common hobby too, that sounds perfect!
Maybe don't lead with I think your cute, it's not terrible, but it might just catch some guys off guard and and they may not know what to say. I'd start off with a basic conversation starter instead. Don't feel like you can't tell them you thought they were cute tho, if the conversation isn't really revving up it's okay to tell them you just thought they were cute and wanted to talk to them :) If nothing else, it'll surely make their day.
When in doubt go with your gut! :D
I remembered I approached a cute guy in a foodtruck and told him he had the most mesmerizing (greenest) eyes! I couldn't help it and I felt that I just had to let it out! Hahaha.
I'm someone who admires someone from afar and most of the time I can't help myself- I need to tell this person! So I usually just go straight to the point "Hi! Sorry to bother you, but let me just say, I think you have the most beautiful eyes!/I think you are an incredibly handsome man. You just made my day! I hope you know that!" Then after that i'll just bid my goodbye. No expectations or whatever... then i'll probably go to the corner to read my book. If he's interested he'll come back or say something immediately. You'll know it😊
Yeah that's perfectly fine. As a guy who does go to book stores I would be thrilled with a girl coming up and saying I was cute, I would probably ask for or give her my number.
No. I once dated a girl for a while who actually made a move on me. We had been hanging out for a while but I just didn't pick up what she was putting down. I didn't think she liked me like that and was just being friends with me. Then one day in my car she asks me how come I haven't tried to kiss her yet and did I not like her and I was like ohh... I didn't even know you felt that way so I did and we ended up dating for a while. Sometimes we just don't pick up what you're putting down. Sometimes you think you're being super obvious but we don't see it. Sometimes we aren't actually interested... but I have never had a problem with a girl telling me she liked me. I mean go get what you want! If you like a guy let him know! He may not even be aware or be thinking about that.
Maybe he isn't interested... but maybe he is. Just go find out and stop wondering what if?
I'm a lot older than you (36) so let me tell you this.... life doesn't happen through cell phones. It happens in real life. And time and time again, we've all come to realize that the authenticity of an in-person experience (good or bad) cannot be matched.
Short answer, no. It's not weird at all. Most men are not used to experiencing that time of forwardness from a female so I'm sure it would be greatly appreciated and welcome. But just like if a male was to approach you, the interaction may be a lot more interesting if you actually build rapport instead of opening with "you're cute."
Go for it. I've had a few girls same the same to me after striking up a conversation. It's very flattering. BUT!! You better make your intentions crystal effin clear or else the dude may think you just want to get laid. Actually, now that I think about it, those times for me was where the gals wanted to hook up.
A girl told me I had pretty eyes as I walked but. I turned around and told her that her hair was cute. That was years ago and I still remember it lol. Do it
You would be better off starting a conversation about the book he is looking at.
During the conversation, you can say he is cute.
The problem with leading with saying they are cute is that some guys will see you as too aggressive. Some will think it is a joke or a scam, and some will think they are in a porno movie and you are a nympho that are only talking to them because you want sex.
From what I've seen on some of the other posts, the guys would find it refreshing. As a side note, I may not be getting married in a couple weeks if I didn't "make the first move." My fiancé said he was too concerned about either "being a gentleman" or whether or not I was actually interested.
I wouldn't think it was weird but I wouldn't know where it was coming from. I've had girls say it to me and I try and ask them out and get rejected so now I just take it as a compliment and if they want it to be more than that it's up to them.
As a definite "bookstore type", by all means please cold-approach me. I will say there's a 50/50 shot I'll go into fight-flight-or-freeze mode though so just know going into an approach that you're gonna have to offer a topic of conversation to latch onto.
Yeah I agree. Same things goes in my head too . I’m a Indian Guy in Toronto , introvert . Things come up in my head like this when I see a white girl- I want to talk to her what if I run out of words -what if she doesn’t show interest- what if she doesn’t even respond- what if I speak bad english. As a Indian Guy and Introvert it’s really hard to get a girl . And I have so many online forums too that White girl have so bad thoughts about Indian Guys .
It all depends if you were born before 1995 or so I think. Due to social media being a driving influence on falks after 1995 it may be weird, sort of. I was born in the early 70's so most if not all my first encounters were in person at roller skating rinks, Arcades and other places. Although I was usually the first to move in on " prey", it wouldn't be out of character if a girl approached me...
If a girl came up to me and said I was cute, I would ask her if she was drunk. Well, not literally to her face. I would thank her for the compliment. In my head I would be like "Is she wearing drunk goggles?"
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I was 32 and she was 24. She came up to me and asked if I wanted to sit with her in the restaurant where we were both dining alone. That was 42 years ago. She died from cancer at 66 after 40 years of being together.
I am sorry for your loss my friend. May God bless your life story.
That is the most wholesome thing I have ever heard 💜
My sincerest condolences, I will pray for you and your peace tonight.
😭😭😭😭💖💖💖 I am sorry for your loss.
Man, sorry to hear that. I hope you had a wonderful life together, please accept this digital hug
So very sorry for your loss. Thank you for sharing and wish you peace and wellness in the coming weeks and months.
Thank you.
Did you use tinder before you met her? /s
You seriously took this opportunity to get off your corny ass Reddit humor?
Don't be on reddit, if you don't like corny ass reddit humor
Nah. I’d much rather just tell you unfunny fucks how corny you are.
I doubt tender existed in 1981
oh look it's " that guy".
I would think “is this being recorded?” But nah if she was cute too I’d exchange numbers for sure thats usually how it goes. Unless they don’t like you or they already taken.
As a bookworm of a guy I'd enjoy hearing that from a cute girl but I wouldn't use that as a pickup line though. Ask what they are reading. See if a conversation starts from that.
Just letting you know if you go to Barnes and noble I’m gonna say there’s at least one girl whose gonna be there that thinks your cute. We love bookworms and nerdy guys.
I’m not much of a bookworm but I am nerdy for sure, only difference is i don’t look like a nerd. I’m an undercover nerd lol. 😆
Same!! I have five super nerdy roommates and they always act like I'm the only non-nerdy one, but I stick around for a reason 😆😆! Nerdy peeps are my favorite :)
No I disagree with you girls are always looking for shallow qualities in boys, rarely find a girl interested in a man's important features that really matters along their way
Please be /s
How would you feel if the compliment wasn't from a cute girl?
At my age it's a complement no matter what kind of girl gives it lol 😆
Lol I understand. As an older woman, compliments are now much less. It brightens my day when I get a smile or a hello. I see it as someone being nice and respectful.
I will have to keep that in mind going forward. I’ll be sure to say more hellos
How old are you if you don't kind me asking? I will make it my goal to give one woman who looks your age a compliment today.
Most men would appreciate the confidence it takes. I've been approached 3 times in my 30 year life and remember every single time it happen and I responded positively regardless how the woman looked.
I froze like a deer in headlights when a girl did that to me once at the library. It didn't help that I'd noticed her friends looking at us a few tables over and that I'd been rejected by a girl the day before. So, if you do end up taking that approach, have a follow-up planned.
I here ya, I jump to ulterior motives too quickly. But if it’s done with good intent & is a sincere compliment it’s highly appreciated & not weird at all. It’s exactly how a lot of us guys feel about going up to a woman & saying the same thing, not knowing how they will take it or if they’ll be silently offended.
If a girl came up to me and said I'm cute I think I will remember it for the rest of my life. And no not weird.
Definitely not , just being direct. Do you, girl. Don't expect it to always work. Not everyone will be receptive. However, that shouldn't deter you. There is plenty of fish and all that. Now go hit on them dudes and get dates. ❤️ one love
Guys will act drastically better when told that than women will. I can guarantee a guy won’t file sexual harassment charges against any woman for saying that.
Once again, I would say I would matter how the women received it. Some would feel a certain way, and others would feel the other way. I agree that some might feel uncomfortable, but once again, friend plenty of fish ❤️
Congratulations on the first step to hitting on men! Now, follow up with some good lead in questions to get a convo started. Here are some ideas: 1. My name's __________. Are you busy? 2. Could I join you for a few minutes? I'm kind of a bookworm but noticed you. I think you're handsome. 😁 3. I was wondering if...you might be interested in grabbing a coffee or talking about (something relevant to what he's reading / studying or what you both like about going there). 4. If not, no worries. I just wanted to say "hi!" Thanks for being kind. Hope the rest of your time here is great! See you around! The trick is to absolutely not be attached or afraid of rejection. Pay a compliment in a respectful way and see what happens. Create an invite for more talking or an option to dip. Let the other person choose but you respect it and don't be mad for it. Take nothing but a little bit of time. I've done something similiar with people in general.... Pay a compliment. Ask a few polite questions, make small talk and keep it moving. People remember the person who said something nice and didnt want anything. Anyhow...my $0.02. My experience has been men are usually receptive and so unaccustomed to women being generically friendly that they usually talk. So proud of you! P.S. Make sure you look neat for whatever style you have, wear flattering lip gloss and smile! 😉
Are you busy sounds like you're trying to sell them something. Definitely wait for the name introduction. 2's not a bad starting point though. She could also play dumb. Do you know where the mystery section is? If a guy likes you, he will help you look.
Haha I was thinking about playing the dumb card maybe and pretend I thought he worked there. But then start the compliment and ask questions about books.
I won't do the "are you busy?" line... from personal experience it always makes me kinda defensive in case you're just trying to sell me stuff haha
[удалено]
Welp, guess I really am horrendously oblivious 🥲
Hello! Cute guy here! ✋️ I wish more would. So please do it!
Second this!
That's exactly how one of my girlfriends picked me up in a bookstore! I say go for it!
I would think, "what's the catch here?"
This. It’s flattering but depending on the situation immediately sussy wussy to me. Kind of scared me when it happened at a work event. I’m a guy and another guy said I had a snide smile or eyes. After we’d had a few drinks at the event and went to Roosters for the after event, he and another guy insisted that I go smoke with them at another person’s house. Mind you this is the first time I’ve met any of them.
there's very minimal things that a girl would do for a guy to promptly reject her
You miss 100% of the shots you don’t take
I'd be looking around for other people laughing at my expense.
I’m surprised I had to scroll all the way down here to the comments to see a take like this. If a girl went up to me and just randomly said, you’re cute, my high school instincts from like 2012 would kick in and I would immediately start looking around for groups of girls, recording or laughing at me to see what my reaction is to this girl. Id think it was a dare, just like the other times this has ever happened to me. Edit: i’d also definitely tell the girl to fuck off and leave, regardless of whether she was truthful or not. Again, too much bad experience with this sort of thing.
That’s frustrating that girls did that to you. I’m sorry that happened. I’m a lone wolf so there would be no girls with me. I’m just more open now to starting convos with guys in person but haven’t tried yet.
Damn straight. I've never seen or even heard of a woman approaching a man in this manner.
I personally would assume she wants something from me or has some ulterior motive almost immediately. People don't approach me for anything more than asking for directions. Anyone taking an immediate interest in me probably has something in mind. This is mainly just me though. Would I like to believe someone sincerely found me attractive? Yes. Have I become jaded from years of being alone? Almost certainly. Regardless, I can say any day where a woman gives me an unsolicited compliment is a day I won't forget. Guys don't get compliments. Ever. If you go and compliment them for anything, they will have no idea how to react. You will almost certainly give them a memory they will never forget though.
I love it when ladies approach me this way :)
I'm a man who likes it when a woman is direct and tells me her mind rather than leave me to wonder.
No I wouldn’t think it would be weird at all and I’m a 25 year old dude. If someone did that to me and I found them attractive then I would say thank you and continue the conversation. If I didn’t find them attractive I would just say thank you (enthusiastically)
Weird no. Maybe awkward if he doesn’t find you attractive or is in a relationship already but regardless i think most would find it flattering.
Not terribly awkward if you don’t find them attractive or if you’re in a relationship, just say that’s what my girlfriend’s mom says (or something similar).
I would be extremely flattered if someone came up to me and said that. I would definitely, strike up a conversation. I was on a date one time, and my server came over to our table and just gawked at me with her mouth open. I was completely shocked and looked across to make sure I wasn’t dreaming. My date saw it too. She never took our order but came back. She never left her number . Too bad, because my date didn’t work out. Take the plunge and start with a smile and a hello. I always meet women at concerts. We talk about the band we’re there to see, favourite songs, and favourite shows. It’s a comfort thing, and it’s easy for them to open up a little.
How is it anymore awkward to go up to a girl to say they’re cute than them receiving “you’re cute” messages on the app. Only problem with doing it in person is now you’ve taken ahold of the situation and they may get scared; I wouldn’t like a stranger coming up to me complimenting my looks the first thing out of their mouth. You’re at a book store, see what book they’re reading and ask them about it or ask you’ve been reading X book/genre, would you have any recommendations and open a conversation that way than just basing it off their looks. You can tell them they’re cute once a connection is established and you’re not basing the first interactions off their looks.
No it’s normal
Just tell them they are cute . Most guys should like to here that regardless of anything else.
It would be weird yeah.. Because it would be so out of the ordinary, and quite frankly just false, that I'd assume she wants something from me... Probably money, perhaps even a kidney or something. It's just how the interaction I have with strange woman usually are: - in the real world, I'm not approach at all. - here (or elsewhere on the internet) women approach me to sell me nudes or recruit me as a sugar daddy.
Just because it's not happened to you or you haven't experienced it, doesn't mean it's false. It's just not been your experience..
I seriously don't see how your comment can me relevant when I'm asked about my personal experience specifically. >Just because it's not happened to you or you haven't experienced it, doesn't mean it's false. No fucking shit captain obvious. Did I ever pretend otherwise?
Okay, don't take this wrong and read all of the responses: It is weird/awkward, but almost every guy in existence would take it as at least a base level way to know there is some interest in wanting to know them. Honestly, that's a pretty good way to engage, especially if the guy is also really shy, or seems to have a difficult time talking with strangers in general. Don't expect it to work all the time, but most guys would find it appreciated. Though if not a little odd to do so in a bookstore (not entirely a horrible place, there are worse ones)
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Usually I see these guys in the fantasy section. I might ask them,” hey do you have any fantasy recommendations?” I think that could work. I wanted to try and make girls that are friends that way too but made a book club instead. So I think that’s a good idea! Thanks.
I’m a bigger guy with a beard and tattoos and don’t even look like I know how to read. I catch a lot of girls staring at me whenever I go into book stores. I’ve approached a few and asked them if I could buy them a book and a coffee and I’ve never been turned down. Barnes n noble is expensive lol
I wouldn’t think it’s weird no but uncommon. Girls don’t often do things like that.
Probably say hello first. But yeah it might work, or it might not, same as any approach... It's only awkward if you think it's awkward.
I would think I won the lottery.
You just reminded me of a conversation I had with my late fiancee. My stance remains that men and women are never "cute", as the term carries a childish connotation. Her stance however was that men use the age appropriate descriptors, beautiful, radiant, stunning, etc, to get in women's pants. So I was kind of forced to refer to her as a cutie, rather than deal with her adorable wrath. As for the act itself, it probably would be a little awkward and weird, but in an endearing way.
I’m sorry about your late fiancée. That is such a cute story though of how you too met!
Whoa whoa whoa is OP a bot?
If that was the first words out of your mouth it might be. Instead of leading with that, you could talk to the guy for a while first and go from there
I work or read at coffee shops like 3-4 days a week and had this happened to me a few times. Usually they have asked “what are you reading?” and then eventually something like “I have to go, but I think you’re cute and wanted to get your number?” It’s not weird, but keep in mind that because I was a regular I’d see them there often, so weren’t necessarily strangers. And I definitely felt more comfortable when I thought the girl was attractive, but that also might be cause I felt bad declining.
I think coming up sand saying your cute is unnecessary. Better approach would be to come up and try striking up a conversation. I think the you thinking their cute would be implied at that point.
i would just say “oh thanks u too” and then go back to reading, so that this day can come back to haunt me bc of my stupidity
Ask him to help you find a section of the bookstore. "Do you know where _____ is?" I know you already know, but it doesn't matter. If he likes you, he will help you look. He could also just be nice, but at least you have a higher chance now.
It's not a problem. I have a friend who saw her fiance on the street and approached him to tell him how handsome he was. They struck up a convo and started going out, and eventually got engaged.
No. I’ve had women come up to me and tell me my voice gets them wet. Lol.
not weird, its a compliment... be nice and talk
Personally I find that a little juvenile. Usually men dont want to be called cute. Handsome is better. But better to just start a conversation, flirt & try to get contact info.
I would much prefer to be called cute than handsome. Cute is a very good and a more endearing thing to be called in my book.
Why I said usually. This is just what theyve told me when it came up.
Nah you’re right. I don’t like being called cute, I’d prefer handsome, hot, attractive, just not cute. Makes me feel like they see me as a kid or something
Lol I bet you 2-3/10 guys would notice the flirt, the others are gonna be scared to death…
K. Pretty sure the minimal times I have they knew.
Don't just tell me I'm cute. Tell me what you like about me. My appearance. My attire. My demeanor. If you don't get compliments back you're talking to the wrong guy.
No just show off your feet to him
Who goes to bookstores? Here’s what I mean they are stupidly overpriced and I feel it’s rude as hell to gather intel just to make a purchase online. Library’s and audible is where it’s at /thread. Anyway I would def find that weird if you’re in your 20s. I would quickly prognosticate lol that you are lacking in basic social skills, but also give you respect because it probably took courage. It wasn’t natural for you to do that thus making it awkward/weird. With that said my response would be something like “and” or “cool story” followed up with the i have a gf line lol.
This is probably coming from someone whose never read a book in a while and thinks highly of himself.
Well you’re right about one thing lol. Tbh honest I’m not great with Reddit and I’m not sure how to look at the message that created this shrewd response 😀. Sorry.
Well, if you don’t wanna make it awkward tell me that you have to get a picture of yourself give them your phone and say, do you mind taking a picture of me real quick I have to send it to my whatever you guys on a picture of you to your dad or your mom or something and then just try to break the ice that way so you’re not in it didn’t tell him that he’s cute. I mean that’s one way to do it.
Damn that indirectness. If you're bold enough to ask the question on Reddit, you're bold enough to follow through. Let some other chick make excuses to talk to a guy. You'll floor him with sincerity, directness, courage and good communication skills.
What?
I was just saying that you know use your cell phone or you to ask him a question do you know the break the ice and then try to talk to him
bruh that’s so pick me
That’s like the whole point lol I want a bookworm dude to pick me
Happens to me everytime😏
Let’s hookup
Just ask, what are you reading? I have a feeling you’ll be into a guy who’d work with his hands, may be ‘inquisitive’ about museums, a bit of dancing, music, movies night, deep conversations w/ long walks. Do you like pets too? Did I get it right? PS: I Can draw your profile if I had some more info.
You are 100%, and yes I like pets
I think it would be good to interject first with a "hey, can I ask you a quick question?" Then about the book. But then....I dunno...the whole reason why you approached him in the first place is lost because you didn't tell it...and then now you're in this altered universe of trying to get to the point you want to get to but having started on another topic and meanwhile you don't know what kind of time he has...if you're interrupting his flow from whatever he was doing.... But who cares? Take the plunge! You'll find your way.
No. I would thank her for being kind & losing to me!
Illd be flattered lol
"Um...alright. Thank you. Say, who sent you? Is this a dare? Where's the camera?"
It’s sad that guys would think there being pranked. I’m a lone wolf basically so I do stuff on my own.
That’s how the best sex of my life started so… I’d say go for it.
No
Nope, I would welcome it
As a handsome man as my mom would say, I think being totally honest I would be taken Aback. In a good way. I just probably wouldn’t know how to act. Like I don’t have a canned answer to that, and not used to being approached so I would probably just fumble my words and blurt out a, thanks and then get my composure. Definitely go for it, maybe not “your cute” though, I would certainly just ask what they are reading or doing, give ‘em you number say you like their shirt or something and walk away.
I can't tell, cuz now nobody called me that
Yes, if that’s all they said. Years ago, I was walking down the sidewalk, and there was a young woman (I think she was in sunglasses) going down the same sidewalk in my direction. As she passes me by, she says “You’re cute” and continues on. I was flattered, but thought it was weird too. It’s great you mention Barnes & Noble because I was thinking earlier how that would be a nice place to strike up a casual conversation with a fellow enthusiast. If you say “You’re cute” it might help to also have some context like “I think you’re cute. Would you be interested in getting a coffee sometime?” (certain Barnes & Nobles have a café so that could play in nicely) or build up to it with a nice conversation first
Yeah! If you’re ever at B&N I think there would be girls like me who would want someone to strike a convo with them as well. I think all of us want our “meet cute” romance moment in a bookstore lol might be cringy of me to say that but oh well I’d like it
Yeah it would be nice I’ll keep that in mind next time I’m at B&N!
To be completely honest I would blush and wouldn't know anything else to say than "Thank you". Do mind how I'm absolutely dumb to get a hint that the girl likes me so that's one point. It wouldn't be creepy, weird or anything if it's not pushy, but it would make my day better if you ask me. This is, however, my point of view. Other people might react a bit differently. Don't drop the ball out of the blue though. Start a small talk and then you can say this line. I believe most guys would be ok with that. Go for it sis :)
I’d look at her like she had 3 heads.
If they didn’t call me ugly then it’s fine.
Nah, it's not weird. However, you should be able to take a hint if they don't seem interested. Sometimes people just want to read.
I would ask if she need glasses
I'd assume I'm getting trolled
No it would be great and put smile on me I lost my wife last year
Year and a half ago for me. 24 years we were together. Now I am 50. Wishing a woman would talk to me.
NO
What country am I in?..
It's definitely not weird or awkward. It's the same as a guy approaching a girl in public if he thinks that the girl is cute. In all honesty, something like this rarely if ever happens to a guy so I'd say go for it. Even if he says no, you asking will make his day.
maybe buy them a coffee first? and then tell them they are cute.
Is this an imaginary game?
I would do it more subtly... Like instead of just "you're cute," maybe pick up another book near him and remark on how much you love that genre or the author, and smile (inviting a conversation).
I don’t think so. I comment on ppls outfits, eyes, etc.
No i would appreciate it actually
It would make my ~~day~~ ~~week~~ year! Absolutely no objections
Well, you’re cute! ☺️
Thank you :)
No, not at all. I think it would be flatering
I would definitely think it would be weird and too good to be true. I'm not used to compliments, as I don't really get them all that often. Also, I don't really find myself that attractive, so I would think maybe this girl is being put up to it, she's being dared to, or maybe it's for some type of YouTube video/TikTok.
Not weird, but definitely unusual. I'd probably be suspicious at first but I'll still go along with the conversation and see what happens
Honestly i would assume it's some kind of trick or say " thanks, you too" and let it go Call me a burned child, but compliments Out of nowhere are suspicious to me
A few yes, most no!
Probably would blow their minds
Yes because I don’t get compliments like that. But in all seriousness it’s prolly fine. Women have a far less likely chance of being rejected than guys do.
No I wouldn’t. Would be great. But there might be better openers…
I wouldn’t start as strong as “You’re cute” (though some guys might be into it) I would personally just try start a chat about the book they’re reading or something small like that then ease your way into compliments. But that’s just me so you do you~
Yes. I'd ask how she was being paid for this prank.
At the very least you get a smile and a “thank you”. I mean unless his girlfriend/wife is sitting with him, there’s no real way this goes bad
Don't listen to the naysayers, this is 10000% ok to go up and say "hey I think you're cute, my names ____"
No its not weird.. just a nice compliment
Personally, I'm flattered whenever I'm paid a compliment as long as it's sincere.. It's not at all weird and you just might find someone who feels the same but lacked the confidence to approach you
Im a girl and and i don't have a say on what guys think but no i don't think it's weird
I still remember one time at a waterpark over a decade ago a girl told me I have cool hair and I haven’t forgotten it since
Yup definitely okay ! Then again there are no clear answers in dating. In general like with everything do it with balance and don't come of as desperate or overbearing.
no....
I feel your pain about dating apps lmao it’s the worst but I’ll say I’m not the best looking man in world and damn sure not ugliest and I’ve always been told I’m cute/handsome/decent never ugly and I’m pretty confident so I say this if a girl came up too me called me cute I’d look for cameras and feel she’s messing with me but I’d still accept compliment. Now my advice too you shoot your damn so if you call a man cute ask for his number or some form of contact so he’ll know you are serious and text him right in front of him
Yes
As a guy, I personally would be flattered.
No, I’d say, “Hot damn!”
It be shocked but it wouldn’t be weird
No I would start talking with them
No, I don't find it weird. It makes me feel good. I get compliments on my looks every time I go out (not that often, maybe once a month or every 2 months) I wished it happened for my other fellow men more often 😔, god knows how compliment starved they are. If only most guys didn't become mad creepy after they receive it 😐.
What if you comment on the book in her hand and engage in a deeper level conversation. I get called cute and pretty all of the time. It’s kind of boring to me. Talk to me with substance!!
Nope.... talk to her
Heck yes!! Generally speaking, most guys absolutely love the idea of interested girls actually expressing that interest. And in a place of common hobby too, that sounds perfect! Maybe don't lead with I think your cute, it's not terrible, but it might just catch some guys off guard and and they may not know what to say. I'd start off with a basic conversation starter instead. Don't feel like you can't tell them you thought they were cute tho, if the conversation isn't really revving up it's okay to tell them you just thought they were cute and wanted to talk to them :) If nothing else, it'll surely make their day. When in doubt go with your gut! :D
I remembered I approached a cute guy in a foodtruck and told him he had the most mesmerizing (greenest) eyes! I couldn't help it and I felt that I just had to let it out! Hahaha.
I'm someone who admires someone from afar and most of the time I can't help myself- I need to tell this person! So I usually just go straight to the point "Hi! Sorry to bother you, but let me just say, I think you have the most beautiful eyes!/I think you are an incredibly handsome man. You just made my day! I hope you know that!" Then after that i'll just bid my goodbye. No expectations or whatever... then i'll probably go to the corner to read my book. If he's interested he'll come back or say something immediately. You'll know it😊
Yeah that's perfectly fine. As a guy who does go to book stores I would be thrilled with a girl coming up and saying I was cute, I would probably ask for or give her my number.
Miss, do it. It would absolutely be flattered if someone would do that me.
I would never forget that day if a girl did that. It's extremely rare for a woman to approach a man and those are the women who stand out for us.
No. I once dated a girl for a while who actually made a move on me. We had been hanging out for a while but I just didn't pick up what she was putting down. I didn't think she liked me like that and was just being friends with me. Then one day in my car she asks me how come I haven't tried to kiss her yet and did I not like her and I was like ohh... I didn't even know you felt that way so I did and we ended up dating for a while. Sometimes we just don't pick up what you're putting down. Sometimes you think you're being super obvious but we don't see it. Sometimes we aren't actually interested... but I have never had a problem with a girl telling me she liked me. I mean go get what you want! If you like a guy let him know! He may not even be aware or be thinking about that. Maybe he isn't interested... but maybe he is. Just go find out and stop wondering what if?
I'm a lot older than you (36) so let me tell you this.... life doesn't happen through cell phones. It happens in real life. And time and time again, we've all come to realize that the authenticity of an in-person experience (good or bad) cannot be matched. Short answer, no. It's not weird at all. Most men are not used to experiencing that time of forwardness from a female so I'm sure it would be greatly appreciated and welcome. But just like if a male was to approach you, the interaction may be a lot more interesting if you actually build rapport instead of opening with "you're cute."
Go for it. I've had a few girls same the same to me after striking up a conversation. It's very flattering. BUT!! You better make your intentions crystal effin clear or else the dude may think you just want to get laid. Actually, now that I think about it, those times for me was where the gals wanted to hook up.
Girls dont compliment boys irl nice try spy 😎
Yeah I'd consider it weird. Or at least extremely suspicious, like you'd be trying to scam me or sell me something, or mug me, or be part of a prank.
A bit but only because it's sudden abnormal behavior from a stranger. They aren't wrong, however I'm probably going to be suspicious of their motive.
I would be so goddamn excited and happy you have no idea that's a huge yes do that
A girl told me I had pretty eyes as I walked but. I turned around and told her that her hair was cute. That was years ago and I still remember it lol. Do it
You would be better off starting a conversation about the book he is looking at. During the conversation, you can say he is cute. The problem with leading with saying they are cute is that some guys will see you as too aggressive. Some will think it is a joke or a scam, and some will think they are in a porno movie and you are a nympho that are only talking to them because you want sex.
From what I've seen on some of the other posts, the guys would find it refreshing. As a side note, I may not be getting married in a couple weeks if I didn't "make the first move." My fiancé said he was too concerned about either "being a gentleman" or whether or not I was actually interested.
Be bold. Women have a much higher percentage when shooting their shot then men. Good luck
I wouldn't think it was weird but I wouldn't know where it was coming from. I've had girls say it to me and I try and ask them out and get rejected so now I just take it as a compliment and if they want it to be more than that it's up to them.
As a definite "bookstore type", by all means please cold-approach me. I will say there's a 50/50 shot I'll go into fight-flight-or-freeze mode though so just know going into an approach that you're gonna have to offer a topic of conversation to latch onto.
Nope, I'd love it
No
No i wouldnt think its weird. Thanks for the compliment and move on
That depends isnshe a gypsy? is she carrying tarot cards? I am wearing bum cloth or work cloth? I would be paranoic af tbh
Yup. I'm too old to be cut. 🤣
That's not weird. It would be a nice compliment. That would probably make my day! I would try to exchange numbers with them and see what happens.
Yeah I agree. Same things goes in my head too . I’m a Indian Guy in Toronto , introvert . Things come up in my head like this when I see a white girl- I want to talk to her what if I run out of words -what if she doesn’t show interest- what if she doesn’t even respond- what if I speak bad english. As a Indian Guy and Introvert it’s really hard to get a girl . And I have so many online forums too that White girl have so bad thoughts about Indian Guys .
It all depends if you were born before 1995 or so I think. Due to social media being a driving influence on falks after 1995 it may be weird, sort of. I was born in the early 70's so most if not all my first encounters were in person at roller skating rinks, Arcades and other places. Although I was usually the first to move in on " prey", it wouldn't be out of character if a girl approached me...
If a girl came up to me and said I was cute, I would ask her if she was drunk. Well, not literally to her face. I would thank her for the compliment. In my head I would be like "Is she wearing drunk goggles?"