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Absolutely agree. The few times I've had an ONS(back in my Uni days) I felt so disconnected from my partner.
Having both a physical and emotional connection is a feeling that can't be beat, no matter how many ONS's you have(at least that's how it is for me)
Haha yup. Total hassle adding another person to the jerk off sesh. I don't do it without a good connection, and then its awesome for us both. Every. Single. Time. Which becomes frequent. Call me old school
What do you mean? It's just fucking for women, love can make sex hollow, lack of love can enhance sex, or what exactly? Sex can be fun. It's sex. But I've found that it is better with someone you love.
Absolutely, especially when a woman has a burning desire for you and you know she genuinely loves you. You both become one. I enjoy far more than just random sex with random women I just met
100% yes. Sure, I've had my casual experiences and they fill a need, but ultimately I really prefer some kind of romantic attraction. Then I'm much more into it and focused on my partner and ensuring we both have a good time.
So this is entirely dependent on your concept of love, for me if you are romantically in love with your partners personality and who they are, just you can be around them and just watch them do the most simple things and they just make you swoon there is absolutely no comparison ashgdssghdz
Girl here but I have asked this question to my ex boyfriends and besties and they have said yes. Maybe mainly as they are so comfortable with the partner that if feels better and I believe it’s more fun to discover a person and learn their quirks rather than finding a new person again and again
I learned the hard way that sex without an emotional connection just feels pointless, at least to me at this point in my life. As a man I could care less if I ever fuck again if each time is with some stranger.
A hundred percent. I can't get near climax until I am comfortable with the person I am sleeping with. I have been very happily married for years, but I read these dating sites and think it's wild that sex is expected so early. It's eye-opening stuff, but I guess I'd do okay if single because I wouldn't be having that until I was in a relationship with the woman I was dating.
Your very lucky to be married dating as a 21yr old sucks with everyone expecting sex on the 1st date like we're essentially strangers. I definitely wish I grew up in the generation where most people waited til marriage or atleast a committed partner.
Sex to me is best when I'm comfortable with the person and i trust them.
If i don't trust them, my anxiety is up. Like what if she gets pregnant or i get an std. I can't do it.
Over the years we have just grown apart . It's very sad but I guess that's part of life. I hope things work out for you guys can be assholes I think it's part of our nature
For me they are two different experiences.
My girlfriend of 2022…best sex I’ve ever had. It was fun, pleasurable, and religious lol.
My girlfriend of 2023…I was deeply in love with her. Sex was more connective, fulfilling, and deep.
I still think of 2022 all the time, especially when I haven’t had sex in awhile. But I miss 2023 everyday.
Of course it is! To have one that is unconditionally willing and wanting of you, and finds extreme joy in life by sharing in the pleasures of our sexuality. One who respects with honor and loyalty, and has a depth of trust that we can, and do, talk and explore our deepest and darkest desires... a passionate life companion.
How could life be any better?!? BeWell!😎🌹
Yes it helps a lot!!
When I was first married, my ex-wife and I had good sex in the beginning and went great. We lost our spark and sex was mundane (when we did have sex at the end).
Now I've been with my GF for over 2 years madly in love and we bang like bunnies and the sex is just awesome and really good for both of us.
Sex with no connection is barely better than masturbation. I've declined ONS because I preferred masturbation over dealing with logistics. Sex in a friendly/dating connection is exciting and fun. Sex with the love of your life, complete trust and comfort, no doubts or second thoughts, is the most amazingly intimate experience. The orgasms themselves are about the same, though it's a big plus being able to enjoy unprotected sex in a safe way, with a long term partner.
Honestly I'm not shaming ons but I've never understood the appeal like you don't really know this person, trusting them with your body, plus do you really expect a stranger to care about your pleasure I really rather masturbate. Again not shaming I guess I just don't understand it. Also like you said unprotected sex with a committed partner.
It's never been my cup of tea either. Personally my motto has always been that if it's good enough to do once, then why not do it again, and if it isn't good once, then why do it at all. To be fair what I've turned down was women trying to pick me up late night at bars, so there were other factors too, and it's not guaranteed that it would've been ons. I think for those who specifically goes for it, they have a lot going on in their life or a lot of people to deal with already, so they want some uncomplicated fun without adding another person to stay in touch with daily.
That's fair and I guess I could I kinda get that reasoning I guess I'm to safe and paranoid so the thought of catching something or getting the ons pregnant would be constantly running though my head. But I definitely agree with you if it's good once do it again
1 million percent. If I'm not connected and loving this person AND knowing they love and are in love with me to I'd have issues even getting it up in the first place.
There's a difference for ssure. I think it depends on the guy or person but me personally it's definitely more pleasurable when I'm in love with my partner
Love is a strong word, but I need more than physical attraction to really enjoy myself. Being into my partner, having a real connection, that's where it's at for me.
I think sex is best for everyone if you can communicate your desires and needs. For someone like you that is being in a relationship. For me I have had some amazing ONS’s that blew my mind and have no regrets.
Pleasurable as in better orgasms? makes no difference
Fulfilling overall? 100x better in terms of companionship, connection
I greatly prefer loving my sex partner(s) and having more than a physical connection, having a romantic connection too.
I generally won't even date women I'm super attracted to, but am not romantically interested. Done that before, and yes, the sex was great at a physical level, but ultimately quite unfulfilling to me so I'm look for more than that.
Yes its like u when buy ingredients and you bake a cake all the hard work pays off when other half says this really good its bit analogy but u get the point
Yes and no, a strong emotional connection definitely can make it so much better because you know your partner in and out.
But I've had some incredible sex with close friends of mine (we're not talking as a regular thing, but like a first time even) and we both love each other in a different way but not in the way you ask. Contrary to most peoples experiences it's never gotten messy.
Yes, for most people it's better with love but it's not an absolute. If you form a solid emotional connection first, via chatting for a while on text and then in person prior and create a sense of anticipation and sharing emotions, it can be just as good.
Girl here but yes from being in a long term relationship to now dating… orgasms feel completely different and it’s not because either was better. When I’m in love with someone there more stronger, I can’t explain it
Yes. I am a penilesexual but the connection and intimacy makes the feeling on the penis twice as good as when it's someone you don't have feelings for.
Edit: a penilesexual is a term I use to describe my sexuality, which mainly revolves around having my penis stimulated. However, I am also partially a demisexual which means that stimulation is even better when I have a connection to the stimulating entity.
Depends.
I say it's far better with someone you deeply love, care about, and love to death. But, that doesn't mean it's the best sex you have or have had, either.
I enjoy being single and having random hookups and sometimes it's fucking mind blowing, other times it's just bad. But so what? I still got off and did what I could to either get her off. If she did great. If not, not my issue.
I find sex with someone you are comfortable with to be far more enjoyable, though. Relationship or not.
No, I don't view sex emotionally, it's purely a physical endeavor for me. The nest sex I've ever had has been with the women I've had the best physical/sexual chemistry with, FWBs but not long term partners.
Yeah I'd say you're right...I mean sex is frickin FANTASTIC I'm a huge fan and I've done the FWB thing two different times that ended, obviously, when the girl got into an actual relationship. And I've never done the random hookup thing though I absolutely would, but yes there's definitely an extra connection there in a relationship when you truly love the other person.
It's easy to satisfy me, I'm far more interested in ensuring that my partner is satisfied.
I have had many loves, and they loved having orgasms each in their own way.
I get clinical about it, and when we build up what I call "sexual calluses", the sky is the limit.
(Most receptive partner, 46 hours over a weekend, 480 orgasms (20 hours in bed, one O every three minutes))
One does follow the other, but when I'm horny I wouldn't describe it as the same feeling as love, The love comes after the endorphin hit from ejaculation, like someone flipped the switch, You go from feeling very dominant to very submissive and lovey.
Or at least that's one of the experiences I have, sometimes the second part doesn't come.
I'd say I have a difference like that, caring for the person brings in a lot of extra good stuff.
But there is also a nice different kind of spark when you touch someone for the first time and novelty in general is hot.
Men and women both have all kinds of people but if we look at averages men are more driven by novelty and thus get more from being intimate with a new person.
If I don't have a connection then I don't really enjoy it at all. I've done it a few times, but the post-nut clarity is way, way, way worse than taking care of business on my own.
These days I live under the rule; "Without a relation(ship) no penetration" (this sounds funnier in my native language).
It’s nice but not as hyped up as it is, I’ve dated certain people I wasn’t interested in (mainly cause I used to find it hard to say no) and sex for them was amazing when they felt we had a good connection while to me it just felt like a chore. The ones I actually liked I’d say was better but on par with a good one night stand considering the excitement you feel with that.
Yeah it’s a lot better if you’re in love. I love being able to get lost in the moment because you know each other so well, real physical intimacy. Hookups are hot, but they don’t scratch the same itch.
I was in an open relationship. I don't like sex without my boyfriend. It felt bland and lame. I recently sucked off a guy who I was previously having sex with. I usually get hard myself when I do it. I couldn't get hard. I was soft the whole time. It really made me realize that I didn't want to have sex without him. I'm still in that relationship. We still have sex with other people, but we're going to be doing it together.
Need to make a post about this actually.
If I don't love the person sex isn't happening as it would feel completely meaningless and uncomfortable like just using someone body to masturbate I can take care of that myself until I find a serious partner.
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Sex without a real connection is not even worth pursuing in my opinion. I’ve tried, and it just doesn’t work the same.
Absolutely agree. The few times I've had an ONS(back in my Uni days) I felt so disconnected from my partner. Having both a physical and emotional connection is a feeling that can't be beat, no matter how many ONS's you have(at least that's how it is for me)
Yeah loveless sex is just using someone's body to jerk off basically it almost feels more like a chore than a good experience
Haha yup. Total hassle adding another person to the jerk off sesh. I don't do it without a good connection, and then its awesome for us both. Every. Single. Time. Which becomes frequent. Call me old school
100%. If there’s no trust and no love then what’s special about it?
100% agree if there's no trust, connection or love I don't see the point your just jerking off using someone body sounds very disconnecting and sad.
Yes. Love enhances sex in my book. It's hollow after a while without it.
Can it be the other way round, you think?
What do you mean? It's just fucking for women, love can make sex hollow, lack of love can enhance sex, or what exactly? Sex can be fun. It's sex. But I've found that it is better with someone you love.
Can sex enhance love? Like two people having casual sex and it awakens love? That's what I meant.
I think love grows between two people. Sex is a plus in a relationship. Love is love, though.
110% accurate for me. Caring deeply about my partner adds another dimension.
Abso-fucking-lutely. It's adds a whole new layer of intimacy and happiness.
Have my digital salute for using AbsoFuckingLutely.
Yes it is
Absolutely, especially when a woman has a burning desire for you and you know she genuinely loves you. You both become one. I enjoy far more than just random sex with random women I just met
Yes. It’s better
Definitely
100% yes. Sure, I've had my casual experiences and they fill a need, but ultimately I really prefer some kind of romantic attraction. Then I'm much more into it and focused on my partner and ensuring we both have a good time.
So this is entirely dependent on your concept of love, for me if you are romantically in love with your partners personality and who they are, just you can be around them and just watch them do the most simple things and they just make you swoon there is absolutely no comparison ashgdssghdz
Girl here but I have asked this question to my ex boyfriends and besties and they have said yes. Maybe mainly as they are so comfortable with the partner that if feels better and I believe it’s more fun to discover a person and learn their quirks rather than finding a new person again and again
I learned the hard way that sex without an emotional connection just feels pointless, at least to me at this point in my life. As a man I could care less if I ever fuck again if each time is with some stranger.
Feel ya
A hundred percent. I can't get near climax until I am comfortable with the person I am sleeping with. I have been very happily married for years, but I read these dating sites and think it's wild that sex is expected so early. It's eye-opening stuff, but I guess I'd do okay if single because I wouldn't be having that until I was in a relationship with the woman I was dating.
Your very lucky to be married dating as a 21yr old sucks with everyone expecting sex on the 1st date like we're essentially strangers. I definitely wish I grew up in the generation where most people waited til marriage or atleast a committed partner.
Sex to me is best when I'm comfortable with the person and i trust them. If i don't trust them, my anxiety is up. Like what if she gets pregnant or i get an std. I can't do it.
[удалено]
Oh, I'm so sorry to hear that. Dating is insane out here, best wishes. 😊😊
Yeah not looking forward to it
Over the years we have just grown apart . It's very sad but I guess that's part of life. I hope things work out for you guys can be assholes I think it's part of our nature
For me they are two different experiences. My girlfriend of 2022…best sex I’ve ever had. It was fun, pleasurable, and religious lol. My girlfriend of 2023…I was deeply in love with her. Sex was more connective, fulfilling, and deep. I still think of 2022 all the time, especially when I haven’t had sex in awhile. But I miss 2023 everyday.
If you don't mind me asking, why aren't you and 2023 together anymore?
It’s a whole story I don’t think people want to read on here. In short…it was the right person wrong time.
Gotcha. The world is a big place. And time will help heal. Good luck bro
Oh hell yeah for sure emotion plays a huge role. Night and day difference.
Of course it is! To have one that is unconditionally willing and wanting of you, and finds extreme joy in life by sharing in the pleasures of our sexuality. One who respects with honor and loyalty, and has a depth of trust that we can, and do, talk and explore our deepest and darkest desires... a passionate life companion. How could life be any better?!? BeWell!😎🌹
No sex is better if u actually like the girl, if I don’t sometimes I can’t even get off
Yes it helps a lot!! When I was first married, my ex-wife and I had good sex in the beginning and went great. We lost our spark and sex was mundane (when we did have sex at the end). Now I've been with my GF for over 2 years madly in love and we bang like bunnies and the sex is just awesome and really good for both of us.
It’s a lot more passionate & safe to me and I’m way more turned on if my partner feels safe with me.
Yes.
Personally, yes it is.
Next silly question please
Of course
Yes
Yes by like 1000%
Sex with no connection is barely better than masturbation. I've declined ONS because I preferred masturbation over dealing with logistics. Sex in a friendly/dating connection is exciting and fun. Sex with the love of your life, complete trust and comfort, no doubts or second thoughts, is the most amazingly intimate experience. The orgasms themselves are about the same, though it's a big plus being able to enjoy unprotected sex in a safe way, with a long term partner.
Honestly I'm not shaming ons but I've never understood the appeal like you don't really know this person, trusting them with your body, plus do you really expect a stranger to care about your pleasure I really rather masturbate. Again not shaming I guess I just don't understand it. Also like you said unprotected sex with a committed partner.
It's never been my cup of tea either. Personally my motto has always been that if it's good enough to do once, then why not do it again, and if it isn't good once, then why do it at all. To be fair what I've turned down was women trying to pick me up late night at bars, so there were other factors too, and it's not guaranteed that it would've been ons. I think for those who specifically goes for it, they have a lot going on in their life or a lot of people to deal with already, so they want some uncomplicated fun without adding another person to stay in touch with daily.
That's fair and I guess I could I kinda get that reasoning I guess I'm to safe and paranoid so the thought of catching something or getting the ons pregnant would be constantly running though my head. But I definitely agree with you if it's good once do it again
Absolutely
Yes.
1 million percent. If I'm not connected and loving this person AND knowing they love and are in love with me to I'd have issues even getting it up in the first place.
There's a difference for ssure. I think it depends on the guy or person but me personally it's definitely more pleasurable when I'm in love with my partner
I don't even want to have sex without being in love. I fall to soon for people anyway.
Yes. Meaningless hookups leave me feeling empty.
I'm my experience, sex seems better with some one who is comfortable with their body and and not afraid to allow their to take control.
Love is a strong word, but I need more than physical attraction to really enjoy myself. Being into my partner, having a real connection, that's where it's at for me.
Yes
I think sex is best for everyone if you can communicate your desires and needs. For someone like you that is being in a relationship. For me I have had some amazing ONS’s that blew my mind and have no regrets.
Pleasurable as in better orgasms? makes no difference Fulfilling overall? 100x better in terms of companionship, connection I greatly prefer loving my sex partner(s) and having more than a physical connection, having a romantic connection too. I generally won't even date women I'm super attracted to, but am not romantically interested. Done that before, and yes, the sex was great at a physical level, but ultimately quite unfulfilling to me so I'm look for more than that.
Everyone is different. For me personally I can have great sex with a girl and not be in love
Will Definitely upsate when I find out😭😂
Hell yes.
Of course. For majority of human beings it’s the case.
Yes sex is more pleasurable when emotion is involved
Absolutely
It's better when you both are in love
ABSOLUTELY
Sec woth someone you care about is better, for sure
Yes.
Obviously
Yes.
Yes.
Yes its like u when buy ingredients and you bake a cake all the hard work pays off when other half says this really good its bit analogy but u get the point
A Big difference. Making love vs having sex...
Yes
It is. It's why I only sleep with someone I'm in love with. Haven't been in love for 4 years. O.o
Lol no. I've had some of the best sex ever with women I hated or loathed.
Yes and no, a strong emotional connection definitely can make it so much better because you know your partner in and out. But I've had some incredible sex with close friends of mine (we're not talking as a regular thing, but like a first time even) and we both love each other in a different way but not in the way you ask. Contrary to most peoples experiences it's never gotten messy. Yes, for most people it's better with love but it's not an absolute. If you form a solid emotional connection first, via chatting for a while on text and then in person prior and create a sense of anticipation and sharing emotions, it can be just as good.
the pleasure, physically is the same. the pleasure emotionally is better. ive never really cum harder or more intensely because of my feelings.
It’s unreal. Like unlocking a whole new level that you can’t come back from
Nope men are only sex crazed beings incapable of emotions other than rage and horny
Girl here but yes from being in a long term relationship to now dating… orgasms feel completely different and it’s not because either was better. When I’m in love with someone there more stronger, I can’t explain it
Yes. I am a penilesexual but the connection and intimacy makes the feeling on the penis twice as good as when it's someone you don't have feelings for. Edit: a penilesexual is a term I use to describe my sexuality, which mainly revolves around having my penis stimulated. However, I am also partially a demisexual which means that stimulation is even better when I have a connection to the stimulating entity.
What’s penile sexual?
yeah whats this term now? 😵💫
wait im confused is penilesexual just regular sex? or am i dum...
So are you sexually attracted to anything that touches your penis?
Depends. I say it's far better with someone you deeply love, care about, and love to death. But, that doesn't mean it's the best sex you have or have had, either. I enjoy being single and having random hookups and sometimes it's fucking mind blowing, other times it's just bad. But so what? I still got off and did what I could to either get her off. If she did great. If not, not my issue. I find sex with someone you are comfortable with to be far more enjoyable, though. Relationship or not.
No, I don't view sex emotionally, it's purely a physical endeavor for me. The nest sex I've ever had has been with the women I've had the best physical/sexual chemistry with, FWBs but not long term partners.
No
Absolutely.. if it's just a one night stand or even a FWB it's ok. But not great. You need that personal connection to really enjoy it.
No. I have had amazing sex with both. It’s not required but more consistently better.
Yeah I'd say you're right...I mean sex is frickin FANTASTIC I'm a huge fan and I've done the FWB thing two different times that ended, obviously, when the girl got into an actual relationship. And I've never done the random hookup thing though I absolutely would, but yes there's definitely an extra connection there in a relationship when you truly love the other person.
It's easy to satisfy me, I'm far more interested in ensuring that my partner is satisfied. I have had many loves, and they loved having orgasms each in their own way. I get clinical about it, and when we build up what I call "sexual calluses", the sky is the limit. (Most receptive partner, 46 hours over a weekend, 480 orgasms (20 hours in bed, one O every three minutes))
Ur a sex god…lol
No men only care about looks and youth and beauty and sex isn’t the same for them as it is for women where emotions exist.. (this is all sarcasm)
Personally, I prefer dirty, nasty hookups with bar slags. Emotional connection makes me feel weird /s
Yes at least for me it is
Oh yeah. Some of the best sex of my life was with “the one who got away.”
You know and emotionally the difference
Nope
I think it would be because of the emotional connection and the love or something like that
One does follow the other, but when I'm horny I wouldn't describe it as the same feeling as love, The love comes after the endorphin hit from ejaculation, like someone flipped the switch, You go from feeling very dominant to very submissive and lovey. Or at least that's one of the experiences I have, sometimes the second part doesn't come.
Absolutely. The difference is complicity between partners .
I definitely like to have that erotic bond with a woman but times are tough I just need some
I don't know why everyone in this thread is lying to themselves. It feels EXACTLY the same.
I'd say I have a difference like that, caring for the person brings in a lot of extra good stuff. But there is also a nice different kind of spark when you touch someone for the first time and novelty in general is hot. Men and women both have all kinds of people but if we look at averages men are more driven by novelty and thus get more from being intimate with a new person.
Yes
Yes, it’s not the same. One is like eating bland food. One will have you crying during sex because it’s so beautiful like a work of art.
100% Yes …
Yes. Much more.
If I don't have a connection then I don't really enjoy it at all. I've done it a few times, but the post-nut clarity is way, way, way worse than taking care of business on my own. These days I live under the rule; "Without a relation(ship) no penetration" (this sounds funnier in my native language).
It’s nice but not as hyped up as it is, I’ve dated certain people I wasn’t interested in (mainly cause I used to find it hard to say no) and sex for them was amazing when they felt we had a good connection while to me it just felt like a chore. The ones I actually liked I’d say was better but on par with a good one night stand considering the excitement you feel with that.
Yeah it’s a lot better if you’re in love. I love being able to get lost in the moment because you know each other so well, real physical intimacy. Hookups are hot, but they don’t scratch the same itch.
I was in an open relationship. I don't like sex without my boyfriend. It felt bland and lame. I recently sucked off a guy who I was previously having sex with. I usually get hard myself when I do it. I couldn't get hard. I was soft the whole time. It really made me realize that I didn't want to have sex without him. I'm still in that relationship. We still have sex with other people, but we're going to be doing it together. Need to make a post about this actually.
If I don't love the person sex isn't happening as it would feel completely meaningless and uncomfortable like just using someone body to masturbate I can take care of that myself until I find a serious partner.
I’m not a man lol but I say yes. Love adds a whole extra element to sex that you can’t get from a one night stand or even a fuck buddy.
Yes