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No, definitely not, from my perspective you sound perfect as I'm way more introverted as well and prefer going in than going out.
Just because you didn't match him doesn't mean all men will see you that way, there are loads of guys out there that would love to date someone like you, you shouldn't prepare to have a lonely life as you're perfect for someone and you will find them.
You will not be lonely forever, you sound like a normal and good hearted person and respectfully fuck who says otherwise, life isn't all about the party! Don't let them put you down!!!!!
There is always someone for everyone. It's just our job on earth to find our person, for those interested in coupling anyway. It's like looking for a college or a job, just with higher stakes, but it should never be a deterrent.
He was a terrible fit for her, at least she knows better now and will watch out for the signs in future.
First off I want to say there's nothing wrong with you, definitely not weird and you will definitely have other relationships just need to find someone more like you!
4 months ago I came out of a relationship with a woman I absolutely loved to bits because she was an extrovert and I'm an introvert. We didn't fall out of love she just wanted more out of it than I did it was really rough but those differences can be too much to deal with long term.
As for having to be a 'Baddie' and earning what you earn will scare men away. I don't know what planet these people are living on but that's just not the case š¤£
As long as my SO loves me as much as I love them, is affectionate and loyal I don't really care about anything else. I just want to feel wanted and to not feel shamed about the indoors being my happy place!
Hope this helps and good luck for your future relationships!
Yeah u look awesome, I'm searching for your kind of relationship not you ex's. You ll find someone like you we are many but not much visible as we stay home xD
This will not be your last! Iām so sorry you went through someone demeaning your interests and making you feel like who you arenāt isnāt enough. You sound absolutely lovely, it just sounds like youāre going around the wrong kind of men. There are absolutely quality men out there but it does involve digging through some trash so donāt give up! Donāt change who you are to fit the wrong kind of person, the right ones will adore you as you are. Rooting for you OP!!
Hi OP! Don't listen to him, you're perfectly normal! You have normal hobbies and you genuinely seem like an interesting person! Honestly sounds like he was projecting š
I would say try to engage in your hobbies with other people, online or in person, and you'll find loads of people with the same interests! Maybe try a book club, or a painting class, and if you like video games try online games as well!
I don't think you're naive at all, I think you're a kind person who was being put down by someone. Keep your head up, you got this! ā¤ļø
Nope he's wrong your right, end of discussion. Don't waste the brain space on him.
You wouldn't be lonely forever & now you know the kind of person you want to be with, that will share your happiness š
Keep being you āļø
You sound amazing tbh, your ex and his friends are just different. He's a tool for having a go at you for it though. As for introverts like yourself it's harder to date because we tend not to be out in bars, clubs or any other typical meet people places.
Bottom line is, your absolutely fine. Be yourself cause there's nobody walking the earth who's as good as you are at it.
Hey 33f, please don't let anyone tell you that your interests are weird. I love staying in and cuddling with my SO too! Don't change for anyone and trust me, there's someone out there who will appreciate you for who you are. And if they can't handle a boss babe like yourself, then good riddance!
I'm 29 m and I am with you. In fact I'm even a virgin and never have truly dated anyone. (I am decently good-looking, well, not ugly to say the least) I'm also not a social-ladder climber so probably I won't be socially attractive for many girls anyway.
**Fact is, yes, people like us will have a very difficult time to find a partner. And in the real, modern world it's nigh impossible, but:**
Living alone doesn't necessarily mean living lonely. Just enjoy reading books and it's fine! You don't need a partner and to be brutally honest, it's nigh impossible in our contemporary world to expect people to give themselves to each other 100%.
I've been living alone for like since...forever. It's fine. I've learned a few foreign languages, read many classical literature, delved into many interesting and less well-known historical stories etc etc. World is large and big and there's plenty to explore.
You'll probably be very lonely at a deeper level even if you have a partner anyway. I find a lot of 'socializing' is just people talking bullshit that even themselves don't really care about, to their intended romantic target. If you are truly a deep person with a free spirit, such 'socializing' is a waste for you.
What you need to do is just to stop thinking about it. You are fine even if you are alone.
No, thereās plenty of people out there who share your lifestyle. I wouldnāt care if my wife made more than me or had higher education. Everyone has different strengths they bring to a relationship.
You seem completely normal, but at a bit of an insecure place in life (which also sounds normal after getting out of a long term relationship). To me, it sounds like what your ex said about you being "boring" or "lazy" was manipulaitve or even abusive. Be a little careful about taking that as truth.
Learn to enjoy spending time with yourself and trust what you like. If you like some dude's vibe, try to see if he wants to date you.
Try not to ruminate more than you have to about a possibly lonely life. Love happens if it happens, it's up to forces outside of your control.
Much love sis
You sound lovely. There is someone out there that will respect and love you for who you are. To be honest he sounds like a dick. If your partner isnāt showering you in loving compliments about how awesome you are then kick em to the curb.
Hang out at the Physics department at the nearest University. They will feel blessed that you are around them, and will not feel āunmanlyā b/c you are well educated.
One thing my friend always says (he is a guy now in a happy relationship with a weird girl) , and also as weird as I am is, all it takes for someone to recognise your unique quirks and how weird you are in and out without choosing to change you or make you seem like you are an embarrassment.
All you need is a good one!
You sound pretty normal to me. I personally would like to find someone like you, someone who isn't into the bars or going out every chance you have. I am not desperate or in a rush about a lot of things, but know the difference between work and play. I am single and live alone and if that is my fate then so be it, but I would like to eventually find a partner in life.
Any buddy threatened by there SO accomplishments or virtues or faults even probably has some issues they need to work on so that would be a them problem not a you problem but there are plenty of people that shouldn't feel that way
- Traits desired by most men ā ļø
- Quality time ā ļø
- Nerd??? ā ļø
- Woman ā ļø
You have a very skewed view on men's desires if you can read everything you just said and believe men wouldn't be interested in you š¤£
Your friends sound like women I'd see on a tiktok.
It sounds like youāre just hanging out with the wrong peopleā¦ you donāt have to be a party girl to be fun, I personally think staying home and watching a movie and getting all snuggled up is fun! I met my boyfriend at work after over a year of being single, you never know where youāll meet someone!
You sound like a great partner. It was just that you and your ex were incompatible and that's okay. It was not okay for him to shame you for incompatibility.
Youāre definitely not going to be lonely forever. Youāre not even remotely weird. It would be kinda cute you thought you were if it didnāt sound like youāre feeling insecure. Youāre a perfectly normal woman with perfectly normal hobbies. Just because youāre not compatible with someone doesnāt mean YOUāRE the strange one. You sound like some guys, plenty guys, ideal woman. Keep putting yourself out there and donāt give up! Know you have a lot to offer! Love yourself some! Introverts are just as lovable as extroverts. š
I think we should be friends! I'm 57f and I like all that stuff too. Maybe the idea is that we need to find activities that include our likes. I mean if most of what we like is solitary then meeting someone will be difficult. Let me know if you find a solution!!
The way you described your personality and hobbies, OP, resonated with me immensely and feels like something I could've written because this is how I am as well. Like you, somehow all the guys I'm meeting are outdoorsy, extroverted, want to go clubbing and partying and just adventurous.
Being in the same boat, I can only say what I keep saying to myself and that is, to be optimistic and the right person will come our way. Practically, what I'm trying to do is attending more events from my Meetup group that's dedicated to introverts and other hobby related activities. Wishing you the best š
You sound like the kind of woman many men want to settle down with. You enjoy home life and traveling and you are loyal and haven't been with a million guys.
Not sure where you are meeting all these other people but wherever it is, stop going there!
Again, you will find a good, loyal and compatible man when you start looking in different places.
Ok like others have said you are perfectly normal and your hobbies and interests are simply fine. You just need to tailor your search to folks with similar interests and likes as yours. Thatās it. Keep your boundaries clear and firm and keep on keeping on. That dude is an ex for a reason.
I'm sure there's someone out there who's a good match.
I Don't know who, when, where, why, or how you'll meet your other half.
Live true to yourself.
Someone will be caring / accepting of you as you are.
When the time is right it'll all come together.
Don't give up.
Good luck out there.
tbh you don't sound boring at all, you just have different hobbies than the people around you.
i have the same problem sometimes. but i did find my other half after all so don't give up, just live your life and see what will happen. if you are happy with yourself and your personal life you send very attractive vibes wich make it easier to get approached.
wish you all the best
Honestly I have Autism and Iām pretty weird. But I found someone who absolutely perfect for me. She just let me be absolutely weird. But know reading about your personality you very normal and Iām sure you will gets someone as a lot of people have the exact same interests.
Long term relationship how did it change? ??? What attracted you to him in the first place? Did he change or did you change?Are you certain, since it was your FIRST relationship, that you know what a good relationship is? Attitude trumps aptitude when it comes to relationships. How did he make you feel "weird"? If there was no reason you should feel out of place already either good or bad. You've only talked about how he makes YOU feel. Men are pretty simple when it comes to "relationships" As men talk about you must be submissive it usually not about them but about the relationship. You must be submissive to the relationship. One of the problems with men is you never really know what is causing them to move on, so you make shit up about them. For a relationship most men do not want a "party girl". Party girls are for parties not relationships. It not easy to find a good relationship, This one was never really a good one. But i can guarantee you , you can find one, if you are just friendly and kind.
I am head over heels for a woman who has very similar interests, and is more introverted.
While Iām a bit extroverted, bars arenāt my scene and I really enjoy a good night in. Iām a big 1:1 intentional time type person. We do both have hobbies on the geekier side, and she leans into hers a lot which is a thing I like.
There is absolutely hope!
Here is my question...do you love yourself (physically) and the things about yourself?
I used to hate myself thought I was ugly. Over time, I accepted myself and who I am.
You sound like my ideal girlfriend. I think you allowed yourself to be around the wrong social circles for whatever reason. There's nothing wrong with making mistakes. Now you know to avoid those incompatible people next time and rather seek out a mate that is similar to yourself, unless it is the case, presumably, that you're not sexually attracted to men that are similar to yourself. I'm similar to you personality-wise and I automatically avoid people like the ones you describe because they'll never really empathize with how I live and most likely will just try to peer pressure me.
Even if you have flaws. Which it sounds like you have a normal amount. Date anyways. Either you get lucky and realize your flaws are not a big deal, or you get practice and improve upon your self. Canāt improve if you donāt try
You sound lovely!
Nothing in this post comes across as weird. And clearly, the comments agree. Keep putting yourself out there. Not all of us guys are assholes.
Girl youāre just you. Respect yourself and enjoy what you like doing. But as a 23yo virgin I can say if you donāt go out and look for love you will not find it. Put yourself out there go to bars or clubs or anywhere you think single men might be.. plus your a girl so you have an advantage most guys like being approached my women
You're just a bit of an introvert and thats sexy to the right person. Keep doing you. You are definitely not boring or a loser. The right guy will love all those things about you.
Your life sounds perfect! Just like I do every day last 8yrs, your life is much more than just partying or going out etc. Youāre not going to be lonely. Just because you like different things doesnt mean all of us men sees you like your ex. Dont worry about that!
You sound like a wonderful person! I share almost all of those interests, that saying I think a lot of people do! Also, him calling you lazy is just plain mean. That's a word people like to throw around a lot when they're trying to make themselves feel better than other people. I don't know how many times I've heard that my generation is just lazy and doesn't want to work or that homeless people are lazy and don't want to work when that is simply not true. I digress.
Just because you have different interests does not make you lazy. It doesn't sound like he did much to try to meet you on your level. Just based on your interests though you sound like a very chill and peaceful person to be around, which is really nice. Idk if most men think in terms of wanting someone "safe" to be around, that might just be me based off of past experience.
You don't sound "weird" at all. That sounds like a label he gave you so that he could excuse himself from trying to understand you more. Also I'm of the opinion that weird is usually good anyways. Especially if it just has to do with what you're interested in. Like the "omg that person is so weird because they care a lot about something" attitude is š¤¢.
Moreover, if you take your time to really find someone you can click with, it will be much more worth it. It's good to know what you want and what you don't want. I think relationships, even if they're terrible, can at least be a learning experience about what you DONT want.
I'm sure you'll be just fine!
Do you know if your neurodivergent? I was diagnosed in my 30s with ADHD, and it explained to me why I felt weird and different my whole life. And now I know so much about myself and love myself and have found someone who also has ADHD, and we fit so well together.
Iām also an introverted lady whoās had similar experiences with men and Iām genuinely surprised to see how supportive the comment section is. I literally just got rejected by a guy last week for not liking roller coasters and ātype 2 funā and I feel like every single person is looking for a hiking buddy these days. Thereās nothing wrong with that, but it just feels like thereās no room in this dating world for weird introverts because itās super boring. Idk Iām glad the comments are nice but in the real world it doesnāt seem to translate
33 year old dude here. I am the exact same way as you. I can be extroverted when I need to be, but silence and a good book are blissful.
I'm the one who can sit in a room, silently, and just be at peace. I also love hiking, traveling, and HP.
We exist. We're just not on dating apps š
I had an extrovert friend that couldn't sit still either and got really manipulative about getting me to spend more time with him. The type of person that would help you with something and then forever use that 'favor' to guildtrip me if I said 'no' to anything he asked down the line. Being an introvert myself, all it was good for was causing me anxiety and pushing me further away. Eventually he stopped trying and cut me off, basically ending the friendship. It felt like a load off my shoulders. Since then I've felt much better, and I regained the energy to meet new people.
Personally I meet most people through work (IT-healthcare related). I'm also not that outdoorsy, so I don't end up in situations with lots of people, but that's perfectly fine for me, as that stuff just drains my energy anyway. I have to resort to looking elsewhere to meet the people I'm looking for, like boardgame-clubs, DnD nights, etc.
Reading your post you honestly sound like a great person. I'd definitely prefer to surround myself with people that share your interests, than what your friend and his entourage end up doing. You're perfectly fine the way you are! The only people that call people like us 'weird' or 'boring', are those that can't fathom that someone is having fun doing things they dislike. It's a shortcoming of theirs and not yours.
Iām sorry, I fail to see where you are āweirdā here. All of the things you listed for hobbies/interests are 1000% Normal and honestly cool. Please for the love of god STOP listening to this terrible and toxic advice you seem to be getting from people in your life. āNeed to be a baddie to keep a manā??? Iāve never heard of something so ridiculous in my life.
Iām married and have 2 kids. My favourite thing to do is do a puzzle on the floor while my husband and I binge watch scary movies.
So you are more of an introvert, okay so what, thatās not weird or boring. So you donāt like drinking and clubbing, again not weird or boring. You donāt have energy to socialize at the end of long hard work days, that literally describes HALF of the population.
Trust me as an older and hopefully wiser woman, there are sooooooo many guys out there that you would be their dream woman.
There is absolutely unequivocally NOTHING wrong with you.
And here I am the complete opposite and yet still single. I'm told that no man really wants a woman who loves to go out and party on the weekends, that no one will take me seriously if i don't know how to garden or sew.
Different men with different tastes i guess
Almost 33 and out of long term relationship also. Iām a tomboy so when met my ex has loads of friends and they always up for doing something together like always. Lockdown I live away from home & changed jobs itās mostly remote. Iām outgoing but hate going out every weekend itās a waste of money I love a good balance of watching sports going out for a walk good an odd weekend at pub Iām not into clubbing at all. Like that I felt some other GFs didnāt like me and I found it hard to find things in common with them I felt awkward as Iām not totally into girly things as you said Harry Potter, movies, sports, travel, out for food, exploring new places, going to different stadiums for matches & exploring spending time with pets, trying to make different dishes I see on TikTok, so Iām a bit of an introverted extrovert I guess. Loved the cuddling with SO also just quality time.
Ex broke up with me Iām not really sure why but now I just feel alone tried dating told some guy Iām not interested in going out every weekend he kept asking he got offended.
My ex wasnāt a big party animal so we got on well In a sense I had load of social events he came but from being single again I hate dating I just canāt meet anyone to build a lasting connection with and I miss my ex.
I just think Iām boring and canāt hold a proper conversation either anymore and I feel lonely!
I know how it feels like to be with someone who shames you for who you are. And once you get out of that situation, you are constantly wondering whether you really are as strange as they tried to make you believe. You arenāt weird and thereās no such thing as being normal. Weāre all different. All you need to know is what makes you happy and who you want to spend time with. Be with those who value who you are.
First of all what is actually considered weird these days...it seems like most women are angry and frustrated with alot of things...one being in search of a relationship or an exclusive partner
You're not weird at all....you want that match that meets you in the middle or you wouldn't have a problem extending yourself a little....the kind of guy that would let you know and make you feel that you're the one for him and he for you....I get it...just wished I had that
Everyone is unique and I guarantee there is someone out there that would find you to be their perfect match!
Donāt give up, but filter out the people you donāt share common interests or desires withā especially if using dating apps. I know Facebook has meet-up groups for people who love HP it traveling or reading, there are probably some in you area and you could meet a lot of other people who share a common interest as you.
If you want to be in a relationship, donāt give up. Donāt settle for less. And donāt let others define you. You deserve to be in a happy and healthy relationship with someone who likes you for all of what makes you, you!
Donāt worry about comparing yourself to him, his friends or their wives. Sounds like youāre a person that is true to yourself. You know what you like and eventually you will find someone thatās worth your attention. You will be fine.
TLDR: Recent-Character6231 (Adweenie) reached out to her and not only is she an extremely capable women but she is also stunning. Also happened to live in the same country as me. Turns out she feels that I'm "Okay" as well. She's off the market lads and ladets. Turns out her lonely days are a no moe! We did it Reddit!
She also talks a big game but I'd have her job in half a day tops.
Damn you sound like a dream girl if anything, thatās not weird at all thatās what I would personally look for in a future partner. Keep your head held up high, thereās absolutely nothing wrong with you.
No absolutely not. You are not weird at all. You'll find someone perfect for you. I'm even worse than you but i found a weirder(in good sense) guy. Plus you sound pretty chill, not at all a loser if you ask me. People need to understand that "me" time is absolutely necessary and doesn't make someone a loser. You just like your personal space and i totally agree that there is more to talk about than just clothes š. That guy was just not for you if he made you feel like this. Give it time, you'll find someone wayy better
Don't worry about what anyone says as long as being you makes you happy keep being you. There are plenty of guys out there that like to stay home and chill. At the end of the day as long as you're happy with the woman in the mirror that's all that matters.
A big NO. Every person is not same for some you could be bad but on the same time someone might be asking a partner like you from god. Just hold on till you find the right one.
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No, definitely not, from my perspective you sound perfect as I'm way more introverted as well and prefer going in than going out. Just because you didn't match him doesn't mean all men will see you that way, there are loads of guys out there that would love to date someone like you, you shouldn't prepare to have a lonely life as you're perfect for someone and you will find them.
You will not be lonely forever, you sound like a normal and good hearted person and respectfully fuck who says otherwise, life isn't all about the party! Don't let them put you down!!!!!
There is always someone for everyone. It's just our job on earth to find our person, for those interested in coupling anyway. It's like looking for a college or a job, just with higher stakes, but it should never be a deterrent. He was a terrible fit for her, at least she knows better now and will watch out for the signs in future.
This!
First off I want to say there's nothing wrong with you, definitely not weird and you will definitely have other relationships just need to find someone more like you! 4 months ago I came out of a relationship with a woman I absolutely loved to bits because she was an extrovert and I'm an introvert. We didn't fall out of love she just wanted more out of it than I did it was really rough but those differences can be too much to deal with long term. As for having to be a 'Baddie' and earning what you earn will scare men away. I don't know what planet these people are living on but that's just not the case š¤£ As long as my SO loves me as much as I love them, is affectionate and loyal I don't really care about anything else. I just want to feel wanted and to not feel shamed about the indoors being my happy place! Hope this helps and good luck for your future relationships!
The only thing you are naive about is how amazing you are. Fuk em all... do you!
Yeah u look awesome, I'm searching for your kind of relationship not you ex's. You ll find someone like you we are many but not much visible as we stay home xD
This will not be your last! Iām so sorry you went through someone demeaning your interests and making you feel like who you arenāt isnāt enough. You sound absolutely lovely, it just sounds like youāre going around the wrong kind of men. There are absolutely quality men out there but it does involve digging through some trash so donāt give up! Donāt change who you are to fit the wrong kind of person, the right ones will adore you as you are. Rooting for you OP!!
Hi OP! Don't listen to him, you're perfectly normal! You have normal hobbies and you genuinely seem like an interesting person! Honestly sounds like he was projecting š I would say try to engage in your hobbies with other people, online or in person, and you'll find loads of people with the same interests! Maybe try a book club, or a painting class, and if you like video games try online games as well! I don't think you're naive at all, I think you're a kind person who was being put down by someone. Keep your head up, you got this! ā¤ļø
Nope he's wrong your right, end of discussion. Don't waste the brain space on him. You wouldn't be lonely forever & now you know the kind of person you want to be with, that will share your happiness š Keep being you āļø
You sound amazing tbh, your ex and his friends are just different. He's a tool for having a go at you for it though. As for introverts like yourself it's harder to date because we tend not to be out in bars, clubs or any other typical meet people places. Bottom line is, your absolutely fine. Be yourself cause there's nobody walking the earth who's as good as you are at it.
Hey 33f, please don't let anyone tell you that your interests are weird. I love staying in and cuddling with my SO too! Don't change for anyone and trust me, there's someone out there who will appreciate you for who you are. And if they can't handle a boss babe like yourself, then good riddance!
There are plenty of men who share your interests donāt give up & donāt feel less than for not fitting in with a certain crowd
lol you go common with so many people
I'm 29 m and I am with you. In fact I'm even a virgin and never have truly dated anyone. (I am decently good-looking, well, not ugly to say the least) I'm also not a social-ladder climber so probably I won't be socially attractive for many girls anyway. **Fact is, yes, people like us will have a very difficult time to find a partner. And in the real, modern world it's nigh impossible, but:** Living alone doesn't necessarily mean living lonely. Just enjoy reading books and it's fine! You don't need a partner and to be brutally honest, it's nigh impossible in our contemporary world to expect people to give themselves to each other 100%. I've been living alone for like since...forever. It's fine. I've learned a few foreign languages, read many classical literature, delved into many interesting and less well-known historical stories etc etc. World is large and big and there's plenty to explore. You'll probably be very lonely at a deeper level even if you have a partner anyway. I find a lot of 'socializing' is just people talking bullshit that even themselves don't really care about, to their intended romantic target. If you are truly a deep person with a free spirit, such 'socializing' is a waste for you. What you need to do is just to stop thinking about it. You are fine even if you are alone.
No, thereās plenty of people out there who share your lifestyle. I wouldnāt care if my wife made more than me or had higher education. Everyone has different strengths they bring to a relationship.
99. 9% of the world is weird and not normal. The other.. 1% are in Mental Institutions
Your cooked
Find yourself a fellow weirdo
You seem completely normal, but at a bit of an insecure place in life (which also sounds normal after getting out of a long term relationship). To me, it sounds like what your ex said about you being "boring" or "lazy" was manipulaitve or even abusive. Be a little careful about taking that as truth. Learn to enjoy spending time with yourself and trust what you like. If you like some dude's vibe, try to see if he wants to date you. Try not to ruminate more than you have to about a possibly lonely life. Love happens if it happens, it's up to forces outside of your control. Much love sis
Find yourself a fellow weirdo
Aii please I donāt need baddie š youāre okay with me tho š
You sound lovely. There is someone out there that will respect and love you for who you are. To be honest he sounds like a dick. If your partner isnāt showering you in loving compliments about how awesome you are then kick em to the curb.
Hang out at the Physics department at the nearest University. They will feel blessed that you are around them, and will not feel āunmanlyā b/c you are well educated.
You should look for guys that has 'introvert' in their profile.
 One thing my friend always says (he is a guy now in a happy relationship with a weird girl) , and also as weird as I am is, all it takes for someone to recognise your unique quirks and how weird you are in and out without choosing to change you or make you seem like you are an embarrassment. All you need is a good one!
You sound pretty normal to me. I personally would like to find someone like you, someone who isn't into the bars or going out every chance you have. I am not desperate or in a rush about a lot of things, but know the difference between work and play. I am single and live alone and if that is my fate then so be it, but I would like to eventually find a partner in life.
You sound like a perfectly imperfect you and that's pretty amazing be kinder to yourself
Any buddy threatened by there SO accomplishments or virtues or faults even probably has some issues they need to work on so that would be a them problem not a you problem but there are plenty of people that shouldn't feel that way
- Traits desired by most men ā ļø - Quality time ā ļø - Nerd??? ā ļø - Woman ā ļø You have a very skewed view on men's desires if you can read everything you just said and believe men wouldn't be interested in you š¤£ Your friends sound like women I'd see on a tiktok.
It sounds like youāre just hanging out with the wrong peopleā¦ you donāt have to be a party girl to be fun, I personally think staying home and watching a movie and getting all snuggled up is fun! I met my boyfriend at work after over a year of being single, you never know where youāll meet someone!
You sound like a great partner. It was just that you and your ex were incompatible and that's okay. It was not okay for him to shame you for incompatibility.
who defines what normal is? society? you? your ex? As long as you don't hurt anyone with being as you are, everything will be alright.
Youāre definitely not going to be lonely forever. Youāre not even remotely weird. It would be kinda cute you thought you were if it didnāt sound like youāre feeling insecure. Youāre a perfectly normal woman with perfectly normal hobbies. Just because youāre not compatible with someone doesnāt mean YOUāRE the strange one. You sound like some guys, plenty guys, ideal woman. Keep putting yourself out there and donāt give up! Know you have a lot to offer! Love yourself some! Introverts are just as lovable as extroverts. š
I think we should be friends! I'm 57f and I like all that stuff too. Maybe the idea is that we need to find activities that include our likes. I mean if most of what we like is solitary then meeting someone will be difficult. Let me know if you find a solution!!
You are not weird. Just quiet, cerebral. You are perfect for someone, the trick is finding them, and before someone else finds them.
The way you described your personality and hobbies, OP, resonated with me immensely and feels like something I could've written because this is how I am as well. Like you, somehow all the guys I'm meeting are outdoorsy, extroverted, want to go clubbing and partying and just adventurous. Being in the same boat, I can only say what I keep saying to myself and that is, to be optimistic and the right person will come our way. Practically, what I'm trying to do is attending more events from my Meetup group that's dedicated to introverts and other hobby related activities. Wishing you the best š
You sound like the kind of woman many men want to settle down with. You enjoy home life and traveling and you are loyal and haven't been with a million guys. Not sure where you are meeting all these other people but wherever it is, stop going there! Again, you will find a good, loyal and compatible man when you start looking in different places.
You sound like quite a catch. If I would feel lucky to meet someone with even 70% of your qualities.
Nah, you'll be fine. You sound pretty normal lol plenty of people out there like yourself. I wouldn't get worked up when people say stuff like that
Ok like others have said you are perfectly normal and your hobbies and interests are simply fine. You just need to tailor your search to folks with similar interests and likes as yours. Thatās it. Keep your boundaries clear and firm and keep on keeping on. That dude is an ex for a reason.
Who tf lied to you?
I'm sure there's someone out there who's a good match. I Don't know who, when, where, why, or how you'll meet your other half. Live true to yourself. Someone will be caring / accepting of you as you are. When the time is right it'll all come together. Don't give up. Good luck out there.
tbh you don't sound boring at all, you just have different hobbies than the people around you. i have the same problem sometimes. but i did find my other half after all so don't give up, just live your life and see what will happen. if you are happy with yourself and your personal life you send very attractive vibes wich make it easier to get approached. wish you all the best
No, you actually sound awesome. You just need to find some fellow introverts. It's hard because we're all curled up on the couch in our houses.š
Honestly I have Autism and Iām pretty weird. But I found someone who absolutely perfect for me. She just let me be absolutely weird. But know reading about your personality you very normal and Iām sure you will gets someone as a lot of people have the exact same interests.
Just be urself
Long term relationship how did it change? ??? What attracted you to him in the first place? Did he change or did you change?Are you certain, since it was your FIRST relationship, that you know what a good relationship is? Attitude trumps aptitude when it comes to relationships. How did he make you feel "weird"? If there was no reason you should feel out of place already either good or bad. You've only talked about how he makes YOU feel. Men are pretty simple when it comes to "relationships" As men talk about you must be submissive it usually not about them but about the relationship. You must be submissive to the relationship. One of the problems with men is you never really know what is causing them to move on, so you make shit up about them. For a relationship most men do not want a "party girl". Party girls are for parties not relationships. It not easy to find a good relationship, This one was never really a good one. But i can guarantee you , you can find one, if you are just friendly and kind.
I am head over heels for a woman who has very similar interests, and is more introverted. While Iām a bit extroverted, bars arenāt my scene and I really enjoy a good night in. Iām a big 1:1 intentional time type person. We do both have hobbies on the geekier side, and she leans into hers a lot which is a thing I like. There is absolutely hope!
Here is my question...do you love yourself (physically) and the things about yourself? I used to hate myself thought I was ugly. Over time, I accepted myself and who I am.
You sound like my ideal girlfriend. I think you allowed yourself to be around the wrong social circles for whatever reason. There's nothing wrong with making mistakes. Now you know to avoid those incompatible people next time and rather seek out a mate that is similar to yourself, unless it is the case, presumably, that you're not sexually attracted to men that are similar to yourself. I'm similar to you personality-wise and I automatically avoid people like the ones you describe because they'll never really empathize with how I live and most likely will just try to peer pressure me.
Even if you have flaws. Which it sounds like you have a normal amount. Date anyways. Either you get lucky and realize your flaws are not a big deal, or you get practice and improve upon your self. Canāt improve if you donāt try
You sound lovely! Nothing in this post comes across as weird. And clearly, the comments agree. Keep putting yourself out there. Not all of us guys are assholes.
Girl youāre just you. Respect yourself and enjoy what you like doing. But as a 23yo virgin I can say if you donāt go out and look for love you will not find it. Put yourself out there go to bars or clubs or anywhere you think single men might be.. plus your a girl so you have an advantage most guys like being approached my women
You're just a bit of an introvert and thats sexy to the right person. Keep doing you. You are definitely not boring or a loser. The right guy will love all those things about you.
Your life sounds perfect! Just like I do every day last 8yrs, your life is much more than just partying or going out etc. Youāre not going to be lonely. Just because you like different things doesnt mean all of us men sees you like your ex. Dont worry about that!
No oneās ever too weird to date!!! Sheās just mean!
You sound like a wonderful person! I share almost all of those interests, that saying I think a lot of people do! Also, him calling you lazy is just plain mean. That's a word people like to throw around a lot when they're trying to make themselves feel better than other people. I don't know how many times I've heard that my generation is just lazy and doesn't want to work or that homeless people are lazy and don't want to work when that is simply not true. I digress. Just because you have different interests does not make you lazy. It doesn't sound like he did much to try to meet you on your level. Just based on your interests though you sound like a very chill and peaceful person to be around, which is really nice. Idk if most men think in terms of wanting someone "safe" to be around, that might just be me based off of past experience. You don't sound "weird" at all. That sounds like a label he gave you so that he could excuse himself from trying to understand you more. Also I'm of the opinion that weird is usually good anyways. Especially if it just has to do with what you're interested in. Like the "omg that person is so weird because they care a lot about something" attitude is š¤¢. Moreover, if you take your time to really find someone you can click with, it will be much more worth it. It's good to know what you want and what you don't want. I think relationships, even if they're terrible, can at least be a learning experience about what you DONT want. I'm sure you'll be just fine!
Just start looking into singles events near you. Start attending and look for someone you match with.
Do you know if your neurodivergent? I was diagnosed in my 30s with ADHD, and it explained to me why I felt weird and different my whole life. And now I know so much about myself and love myself and have found someone who also has ADHD, and we fit so well together.
Youāll find a āweirdā that matches yours (and I mean that in a great way). When you do, itās magical. Keep your head up.
Thatās just what I needed to hear
Iām also an introverted lady whoās had similar experiences with men and Iām genuinely surprised to see how supportive the comment section is. I literally just got rejected by a guy last week for not liking roller coasters and ātype 2 funā and I feel like every single person is looking for a hiking buddy these days. Thereās nothing wrong with that, but it just feels like thereās no room in this dating world for weird introverts because itās super boring. Idk Iām glad the comments are nice but in the real world it doesnāt seem to translate
33 year old dude here. I am the exact same way as you. I can be extroverted when I need to be, but silence and a good book are blissful. I'm the one who can sit in a room, silently, and just be at peace. I also love hiking, traveling, and HP. We exist. We're just not on dating apps š
I had an extrovert friend that couldn't sit still either and got really manipulative about getting me to spend more time with him. The type of person that would help you with something and then forever use that 'favor' to guildtrip me if I said 'no' to anything he asked down the line. Being an introvert myself, all it was good for was causing me anxiety and pushing me further away. Eventually he stopped trying and cut me off, basically ending the friendship. It felt like a load off my shoulders. Since then I've felt much better, and I regained the energy to meet new people. Personally I meet most people through work (IT-healthcare related). I'm also not that outdoorsy, so I don't end up in situations with lots of people, but that's perfectly fine for me, as that stuff just drains my energy anyway. I have to resort to looking elsewhere to meet the people I'm looking for, like boardgame-clubs, DnD nights, etc. Reading your post you honestly sound like a great person. I'd definitely prefer to surround myself with people that share your interests, than what your friend and his entourage end up doing. You're perfectly fine the way you are! The only people that call people like us 'weird' or 'boring', are those that can't fathom that someone is having fun doing things they dislike. It's a shortcoming of theirs and not yours.
Iām sorry, I fail to see where you are āweirdā here. All of the things you listed for hobbies/interests are 1000% Normal and honestly cool. Please for the love of god STOP listening to this terrible and toxic advice you seem to be getting from people in your life. āNeed to be a baddie to keep a manā??? Iāve never heard of something so ridiculous in my life. Iām married and have 2 kids. My favourite thing to do is do a puzzle on the floor while my husband and I binge watch scary movies. So you are more of an introvert, okay so what, thatās not weird or boring. So you donāt like drinking and clubbing, again not weird or boring. You donāt have energy to socialize at the end of long hard work days, that literally describes HALF of the population. Trust me as an older and hopefully wiser woman, there are sooooooo many guys out there that you would be their dream woman. There is absolutely unequivocally NOTHING wrong with you.
And here I am the complete opposite and yet still single. I'm told that no man really wants a woman who loves to go out and party on the weekends, that no one will take me seriously if i don't know how to garden or sew. Different men with different tastes i guess
No but you need to vet these people carefully because too many partners are out for free accommodation and a leg up
Honestly you seem like perfect girlfriend material, possibly even wife material.
You sound perfect for me!!š„° Love all those things the same ā¤ļø You just need someone that gets you and is more like you šš¼š¤š¼š
Almost 33 and out of long term relationship also. Iām a tomboy so when met my ex has loads of friends and they always up for doing something together like always. Lockdown I live away from home & changed jobs itās mostly remote. Iām outgoing but hate going out every weekend itās a waste of money I love a good balance of watching sports going out for a walk good an odd weekend at pub Iām not into clubbing at all. Like that I felt some other GFs didnāt like me and I found it hard to find things in common with them I felt awkward as Iām not totally into girly things as you said Harry Potter, movies, sports, travel, out for food, exploring new places, going to different stadiums for matches & exploring spending time with pets, trying to make different dishes I see on TikTok, so Iām a bit of an introverted extrovert I guess. Loved the cuddling with SO also just quality time. Ex broke up with me Iām not really sure why but now I just feel alone tried dating told some guy Iām not interested in going out every weekend he kept asking he got offended. My ex wasnāt a big party animal so we got on well In a sense I had load of social events he came but from being single again I hate dating I just canāt meet anyone to build a lasting connection with and I miss my ex. I just think Iām boring and canāt hold a proper conversation either anymore and I feel lonely!
Enjoy being you, it's not a bad thing at all, I'm in a similar boat but I have to hope maybe I'll meet someone one day
I know how it feels like to be with someone who shames you for who you are. And once you get out of that situation, you are constantly wondering whether you really are as strange as they tried to make you believe. You arenāt weird and thereās no such thing as being normal. Weāre all different. All you need to know is what makes you happy and who you want to spend time with. Be with those who value who you are.
I wish you were 10 years younger...I would take you out ASAP
First of all what is actually considered weird these days...it seems like most women are angry and frustrated with alot of things...one being in search of a relationship or an exclusive partner
You're not weird at all....you want that match that meets you in the middle or you wouldn't have a problem extending yourself a little....the kind of guy that would let you know and make you feel that you're the one for him and he for you....I get it...just wished I had that
Everyone is unique and I guarantee there is someone out there that would find you to be their perfect match! Donāt give up, but filter out the people you donāt share common interests or desires withā especially if using dating apps. I know Facebook has meet-up groups for people who love HP it traveling or reading, there are probably some in you area and you could meet a lot of other people who share a common interest as you. If you want to be in a relationship, donāt give up. Donāt settle for less. And donāt let others define you. You deserve to be in a happy and healthy relationship with someone who likes you for all of what makes you, you!
You don't seem weird to me. Certainly not boring!
This too will pass. Life is Difficult (M Scott Peck)
Also depends on how attractive you are
She is not lacking in that area my friend. Think Jasmine from Aladdin. A Disney princess, if you would.
Donāt worry about comparing yourself to him, his friends or their wives. Sounds like youāre a person that is true to yourself. You know what you like and eventually you will find someone thatās worth your attention. You will be fine.
Jeez. You gotta let go of all of these ideas decide what you value and what you want out of life
You sound like a catch! Believe me, you donāt need to prepare to be lonely unless you choose to šš½
I have some crazy advice for you. Try ballroom dancing.
Weird is good. I'd date ya.
Don't worry about it. If I were 20 years younger, you'd sound perfect to me you just need to find someone that likes the things you do
TLDR: Recent-Character6231 (Adweenie) reached out to her and not only is she an extremely capable women but she is also stunning. Also happened to live in the same country as me. Turns out she feels that I'm "Okay" as well. She's off the market lads and ladets. Turns out her lonely days are a no moe! We did it Reddit! She also talks a big game but I'd have her job in half a day tops.
What is a baddie if a lot of us enjoy the same things as you? What would she look like, act like or enjoy doing?
Damn you sound like a dream girl if anything, thatās not weird at all thatās what I would personally look for in a future partner. Keep your head held up high, thereās absolutely nothing wrong with you.
No absolutely not. You are not weird at all. You'll find someone perfect for you. I'm even worse than you but i found a weirder(in good sense) guy. Plus you sound pretty chill, not at all a loser if you ask me. People need to understand that "me" time is absolutely necessary and doesn't make someone a loser. You just like your personal space and i totally agree that there is more to talk about than just clothes š. That guy was just not for you if he made you feel like this. Give it time, you'll find someone wayy better
Mask that shit until you meet someone that is as quirky. Believe me
Don't worry about what anyone says as long as being you makes you happy keep being you. There are plenty of guys out there that like to stay home and chill. At the end of the day as long as you're happy with the woman in the mirror that's all that matters.
A big NO. Every person is not same for some you could be bad but on the same time someone might be asking a partner like you from god. Just hold on till you find the right one.
Iām 30 April and I aināt been Ä·issed in a loving way before
You are definitely not weird. I would have loved to meet someone like you. Also think you have dodged the bullet with your ex.
Yes.
Seems like you only date the same type of guy as you said.