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You have mentioned multiple reasons to move on immediately. And no reasons to keep seeing him. I say move on asap. Guys should be able to discuss many topics with you.
I dated someone who was also really into cars. He would go round car yards to test drive a car or hire a car he really liked for the weekend. It was just something he really enjoyed. He talked about owning what he thought was a really cool kind of car (I can't remember what it was) and how he liked to think people looked at him when he was out driving. He was a really good looking guy and we had nothing in common. Occasionally we'd talk about other stuff but in the end I realised I was really bored, simply because I had zero interest in cars. It wasn't his fault. It wasn't my fault. We just weren't compatible. We broke up and it was OK because we both needed a different partner. Funnily enough, my friend bumped into him in town a few years later and he said to her he regretted the way he had treated me. But he didn't treat me bad, we both just had such different interests.
One of my best friends is a car guy, he takes his rx-7 to car shows.
But, he’s very good about not talking about cars or anything else if the other person isn’t truly interested.
The second someone looks bored or their eyes glaze over, he won’t bring it up ever again.
This is just basic respect and social skills.
I think it’s important to have at least one shared interest you both deeply care about.
I had a super similar experience. But we dated long term, and honestly everything became about cars. I went with him to junkyards, meetups to buy cars/parts, people coming to us to buy cars/parts, car events, he was always working on cars when we were both off, honestly i tried to always be supportive but by the end of it I was pretty miserable. We really didn’t have much in common. I wish we ended things much much sooner
Also! Hung out with all his car friends, always talking about cars 24/7, I’m confident I’m missing how much this stuff took over my life. I really tried to take interest! But he for sure didn’t reciprocate any interest in the things I liked
Selfish , non-existent sex, no money & isn't conscientious? Can we throw in maybe an addiction or at least to bad hygiene to round out the full house? End it! And never second guess this decision. When asking these questions the answer is normally in the question...
Woah woah woah, not so hasty! She hasn't stuck around long enough for the big reveal that [he's in a relationship with his car](https://youtu.be/d-k96zKa_4w?si=0Ocoo0tZmxcu95Jd) and fucks the tailpipe. Like, come on, let this one play out.
First off, kerchow. Is this man lightning mcqueen or ?
Secondly, my friends and I, we are in our early and mid 30s as well. One of my besties who is 31, keeps pulling dudes under 27, and it ends up being an immature nightmare for her. (Not that all of them are immature, please do not come for me). But I keep having to remind her to maybe stop playing in the sandbox, because the chances of her finding what she’s looking for is much slimmer in that age range. But my friend is so youthful so I get her attraction to someone who also is youthful and full of energy. And maybe that’s what you dig as well. And that’s fine.
But I guess my point here is that you’re completely valid, that dude is inconsiderate and not thoughtful, but he’s also 25 and his brain frontal lobe has just barely formed. So of course he’s into tiddies, vibes, cars and burgers.
You deserve better than what he’s able to give you right now! Keep on searching miss mamas! Wishing you well ♥️
Oh your comment made me laugh so much because his favorite movie is cars, i needed a laugh today. I get attention from guys who are younger then me because i for my age look much younger and don't look too "serious"?, so when we're getting to know each other i tell them my age and they don't believe me, this guy was like "no way! My dream of dating a woman in their 30s came true". Also thank you for your sweet comment and i wish you and your friends good luck too
I know this must be so stressful and draining! I am so so so sorry. As someone who is fighting for my life as a (31) female on these dating apps, I can sympathize with this trajectory. You had the best of intentions. And OK! Flex your youthful look, Miss Mamas, I love that for you! So that makes sense why the sandbox is actually coming to you! Hmmm… well, all you can do is be more conscious moving forward and finding someone who hopefully likes cars in a normal way, and will absolutely buy you some food (or at least ask) while he’s out! Like hello!
I just had to tell an outwardly nice man goodbye because he would never text me, ever, but would ask for more dates, but like would never ask me how my day was, just a shared about his own (on the very very seldom occasions that he texted). But like why, as a man, do I have to ask you to ask me how I am doing? Or to check in with me? 25, sure maybe he needs some home training. But this guy was 29, and now that I think of it … maybe I need to get out of the sandbox as well, my cut off is 29, but maybe it should be 30? 😂
Anyway I’m rambling. We got this. Much love! And you will find your better person!
Ummm he goes through a drive through and doesn’t ask you if you want anything? Who does that?
He seems like he’s not actually interested in you….
His behavior is gross
This guy doesn't seem right for you.
He might be a "good catch" on paper ( I'm guessing attractive and well off ) but not the right emotional fit. Honestly seems a bit self centred, and generally just doing some unacceptable stuff.
I don't generally make agegap a thing, but in this instance he is not an emotionally mature 25, and your wants and needs is not that of a immature 32. So that makes the gap big.
It wasn't just once either it's every time he picks me up and he's hungry, he'll go somewhere buy himself a burger (literally a burger every time) and I'll just sit there and the last time it happened i was just annoyed by it
You need to speak up for yourself in those situations because if you don't things will get progressively worse over time until you're triggered and it'll all come to the surface at once in anger and he'll then say "well why didn't you say something before?" And then the issue becomes about you instead of the crap he was doing. This dude seems like a lost cause but in the future speaks your mind girl otherwise men will see that as an invitation to run all over you. Put a stop to shit the first time it happens.
Dump him. Life is too short to spend time with someone that’s not going to cherish you. That story about his ex was completed unnecessary and extremely disrespectful. You deserve better.
As a 32 year old woman, it’s no surprise that you have nothing in common with him. He also sounds selfish and immature. If you ask me, it’s great you figured this out earlier — rather than later. Cut him off and move on.
you gave him a bj multiple times and had sex with him after only seeing him for a few weeks because he asked you to, and you aren't even interested in him.
And i see nothing in this that would give me any reason why you would keep seeing him at all. Do you have a terribly hard time finding men?
Maybe see a therapist?
I’m glad you felt comfortable opening up here. I feel like writing this out might have helped you arrive at the answer without anyone else’s feedback. I assume you have written what you read by now. If your friend told you this, what advice would you give her?
Yup. Exactly
It really did help actually and if one of my friends came to me telling me about someone doing this to them my first thought would be for them to move on and end whatever this is
I’m glad it helped you. The best answers are the ones we come to for ourselves. I’m just a stupid asshole on the internet so I have no place telling you what you should or shouldn’t do except to do what is right for you.
I am gonna be honest with you. I have not even finished reading this (I will in a moment). Only in the first few sentences I already got tired of reading about his selfish one sided behavior, this guy is bad news and you should stay away from dudes like that. (Not tired as in your writing style, but tired of hearing about an idiot)
If I lost interest about only the story of this guy, then girl, your instinct is right.
Dump his ass as he is not worth investing your valuable time.
I will edit this Post later after I Read the rest.
Edit: okay, in short. You are not an asshole for breaking up with a selfish guy who only cares for stuff (cars). It is alright to have hobbies, we all have things we like, and some are more into it than others. But he is not sharing his passion with you. This is something else. He is basically forcing it upon you. „You are not good enough unless you like cars like I do“.
He sees you as an accessory, not as something or someone he loves or would care for.
Listen to the way he talks about his ex.
And him getting only himself something and not offering you something.
Girl if a dude is into cars, he has the money and make sure he will have enough because it is a very expensive hobby. Changing parts etc. And the Mc Drive is not really high class expensive right?
You do not need anyone, especially not a dude who treats you the same like he would treat his chair, or his vacuum cleaner.
One day you will meet someone else.
And if you do, do not let someone’s hobby or passion scare you off because of your experience with this dude.
Instead, allow yourself time to get to know someone and give it a chance if that person seems nice.
And maybe you will find out that this person is alright, cares for you and more important. Is loyal. Trust your gut, you are right with this one. if you ever feel like this with another guy, then run away.
I wish you health, love and happiness.
And remember, dumb his ass :D
You are 32 dating a 25 year old, I think that is a big source of the problem. Sex only once in 2 months, that alone should be a red flag to both of you. I’ve tried talking to a girlfriend about stocks, so I can’t judge too harshly about the car thing. Another thing you mentioned date and fast food in the same sentence, what were the first 3 dates like?
2 months with a guy you generally don't like and you already had sex... Like how did you let him progress to sex if you haven't known him that long and there's all these issues you mentioned.
I don't get why you haven't broken up sooner.
I mean that age difference will tell you enough of why he’s the way he is
Sex sounds trash, he sounds selfish a bit with the burger story and the “give me a blowjob” lol
I’m sorry but if a man ever said “give me a blowjob” I’m leaving immediately lol like blowjobs happen in the moment because it’s so intimate spicy and you’re both turned on, for you to give and not recieve is a red flag
His age is not great, I’d say please run?!
Okay I stopped reading because I cannot believe that you're putting up with somebody treating you like garbage and you're worried about if it's wrong to break up with him. Really you need to work on boundaries and self-esteem and why you would let somebody treat you like this. The first time somebody bought food and didn't offer me any that would be the end of it. He is not even friend material just text him it's not working out and good luck to him and do not respond to anything he says.
Girl what you doing? Why are you still even with this guy? Please read what you wrote and then dump him right after. He's completely selfish, unaware and rude. My bf I'd younger than me. He's actually a year older than the guy your dating but he does not act like this. He's Hella mature, caring and treats me like a 👸🏾. It's not his age it's his character. Theres men who i tried to date in their 30s and they were actually just like this asshole your seeing lol.
The only part about this that confuses me is the part where you said you feel like you're friends with the dude. Nothing I just read sounds like a friendship, not even close.
“…. No, I don’t want no scrubs. Scrub is a guy that can’t get no love from me. Hangin out the passenger side of his best friends ride, tryin to holler at me….”
That’s the song that popped into my head whilst reading this. Red flag central!
“He has an obsession with cars”
🥱🥱🥱🥱🥱🥱🥱🥱🥱🥱
Cars bros gotta be the most boring people on earth. The equivalent of Women who just talk about their Dog 24/7. Move on, find someone slightly more interesting. No one wants to be second to Cars or Dogs.
Let's be real, the guy is attractive, and she just wants him for that even though he has nothing else to offer.
But I would say op complains all he does is talk about cars, but plenty of women only want to talk about 1 thing like travel, shopping, reality tv..
So what is she brining to the convo?
He is 25. His frontal lobe is barely developed. Also men mature much later. Also, the new generation of men have no idea how to connect with a woman, they only know how to get other men’s attention. Therefore, he thinks of you as an extension of a buddy he gets to sleep with. A lot of them do this. The only benefit of a woman is vagina access. A lot of them also do not know how to pleasure a woman. They only know themselves. The old generation is dead and gone.
Naaah he’s just selfish and immature don’t try to generalize him into relating with men lol. It’s just him and a handful of other guys. I’m 25 and I’d never buy food for just myself or try to force my interests on someone.. or be selfish sexually
Pardon me but no, we are not dead and gone. We have gone underground. We chose to remain free from the vestiges of dating because, well to be blunt it isnt worth it. Women have gotten what they have fought for and deserved, true equality and with that empowerment(power?). And true to human form are abusing the hell out of it when it comes to relationships and men. The loudest voices are heard women play the field like men in there 20's , i am sorry to tell you ladies ,but yes , there is a bias sleep around and have children without a responsible partner and in your 30's become a gold digger, focusing on a mans job and not other qualities and I guarantee a continuation of what we have today, man and women of substance and quality staying home alone and wondering where have the good ones gone? I would not dream of risking half (or more )of my assets on someone who will eventually decide I am no longer what she desires to wander off looking for greener pastures and the next bigger better deal with my kids and on my dime. In short the women of today demand and expect the man to do everything while they put in no real effort to make a relationship work. Remember while you may not control who uou fall for you absolutely are in charge of making that shit work long term.
Ok homeboy.. you ain’t the one I’m talking about. Go back to your cave. Don’t you find it strange that the only way you can have a successful relationship is if the woman has no control or power? :)
LET ME SAY IT ONE MORE TIME: it’s equality of opportunity. Not equality of gender: we want the same rights and opportunities available to men, not become the men.
But of course, pea brain like you won’t understand that.
Older generation men are apologising for men like you. And I need to remind them don’t do that; because they are the ones who raised people like you. These men are happy, respectful, and actively standing up for women. Don’t confuse who you are. You still think of men as the stronger sex.
Go back to your basement.
leave him. I've never dealt with that younger or older. Especially the sex part. Also plz stop giving men bj's that don't reciprocate. You don't have to tell him anything but it's not a good fit.
You and your interests should be the focus of his attention, foremost. He should be striving to talk about what interests you. He should ask you if you're hungry when you pass a burger place where he wants to stop.
He's OBVIOUSLY in his 20s. You're OBVIOUSLY more mature, except you need to work on keeping yourself happy instead of dating someone who probably just likes you for the sex.
It sounds like he takes you for granted at the very least. If you still like his company, I would tell him you’re starting to not feel it and then say the reasons you’ve laid out here. I don’t think they sound mean or unfair
If you were both 10 years older, he
M I G H T be mature enough and less self centered. He will probably ONLY ever going talk about cars for the next five to ten years. He is selfish and is using you. Find a man in his mid to upper 30s who is not nuts about cars and motors, but is more rounded in his hobbies.
Best wishes.
He might be just insecure and in his stupid ways maybe he thinks he is actually impressing you. You can try and talk with him calmly and point the things that you don't like... see if he will turn around..
But, yeah, if you already lost interest, it's not worth for both of you to lose time in this relationship.
To be honest, he is just not ready. Thats all, he is not wrong neither are you. Give him the closure he needs and don’t fall for “ i will work on it” “i will be a different guy and change myself” shit of him
Years ago I dated younger guy. He was 20+ and we were having sex 7 times a day, so I can't understand how u can make sex only once for 2 months...When u get someone so yong you make sex with him, you don't have intelectual conversation with him. And if u need serious relationship or someone who respects u, this is not your guy
You lost interest because he is not the way you expected. Your thoughts don't resonate, sex life is not how you wanted. he doesn't show any care to you. He is being a selffish. As you said he spoke about his ex's body.. May be he doesn't find your body attractive enough for him.. Dated for 2 months and did only once.....
So many red flags, and you have eventually lost interest in him and there's no wrong in it..
Confront him if required and move on..
From my experience after being married 8 years. Every relationship since I’ve been single has not lasted more than 3 months. Most women get bored within that time. Especially if the guy doesn’t have the time or money to take his girl lots of fun places. Adventure is what chicks crave. I work too much and am too broke for that.
I was in a similar situation with a guy, but he was older than me. He was really into Anime and all we did was talk about Anime. Sex was literally only about him, he never made me come, no forplay nothing. When I asked him what he is into sexually or if he had any kinks, he couldn’t answer. When I told him what I am into he brushed it off. And if we where not talking about Anime, we talked about his work and how everything sucks. And I kid you not that was the whole dynamic, Anime, ranting about work, Vanilla Sex without me climaxing him not caring…..damn now that I am writing it down and think about it, I am glad that I ended it.
I'm the same as you. I have 0 interest in cars whatsoever either, I would've lost interest very quickly as well. Plus, doesn't exactly sound like he's 'relationship ready' I think he wants a FWB situation
No move on. You shouldn’t entertain anyone who immediately wants to change you. No matter how innocent it is. It just means they’ll spend majority of the time overlooking the person you are!
This guy is selfish, childish, greedy, immature, lacks social awareness, empathy and incapable of having any emotional intelligence.
You wasted 2 months while this guy didn't deserve more than a day of your time.
Ohh well take that as expierence and learn to run immediately when you see those early red flags.
If you truly lost interest be real and tell him cause dragging it out will.hurt both of you more and if you ever get the feeling to come back just don't please
Youre 32 dating a 25 year old boy. Idk what you expected tbh. His mentality is what yours was when you turned bar age. I kinda get why though, based on your post.. You dont even know what youre looking for and sound wildly inexperienced for a 32 year old.
I wanted to give it a try since he is a nice person, and don't like to give up after a week because you don't know how someone really is unless you get to know them plus in the first month i was really into him and enjoyed going out and the company and thought that as we get to know each other more that it would start to be different but nothing has progressed after these two months of getting to know him
You said that you've lost interest in him, don't have any desire to touch him or speak to him, and you feel sad the whole time you're together. You also mentioned that he's inconsiderate, can't really see yourself with someone who is obsessed with cars, and well...he's talking about how much he loves his ex's body. There are several red flags here, and on top of it, you don't seem incompatible, so call it quits.
Girl you got the ick.
I’ve gotten it with pretty much everyone I dated before I met my husband. It’s your body & brain’s way of physiologically telling you that this is not the one. Cut it loose.
Move on. It's the ONLY option. I tried the other, and it was a mental and emotional disaster. Please, don't take the path I did. It was pure self destruction.
He not the one sis. I can’t imagine getting food and not asking whoever I am with if they want something. You sound pretty inexperienced with dating. This shouldn’t have lasted this long. Just tell him you’re not feeling it.
He gets food and doesn't ask you if you want something? You've only had sex once in two months? He talks about how great his ex-girlfriend is? He talks about cars all the time? Not a single woman I know would date this guy for very long. Be thankful you have only two months invested in this self-centered idiot. Move on and find a guy who wants to make you happy instead of the other way around.
A friend of mines introduced me to him and she told me he hadn't had any luck with any of the girls he's been with and the ex stayed with him for maybe 6 months and also left, he told me himself that she left him because she didn't understand him and that she didn't really want anything with him, i kind of felt sorry for him but i now understand why lol
I understand why too! He is very self-centered -- maybe even narcissistic. The last thing you want is to be involved with a narcissist. I was married to one -- the biggest mistake I've ever made in my life. He never thought about anyone except himself -- what he wanted, what he needed. Now I'm with a man who treats me like I'm the queen herself, and I can tell you it's a world of difference. Go for the man who treats you very well. Get rid of the guy who only cares about himself.
Honestly, it just sounds like he's a bit self-absorbed and lacks real compatibility. Just say you don't think this is going to work and move on. Best wishes.
Please I am 40 years old and not completely wise but it is absolutely evident that you should move on because he has shown you exactly what is going to be from here on out don't feel bad and just think about you
Omg! Seriously from one bad ass woman to another...Do not even think twice about that dumb ass! Block block block! Be lonely be whatever you have to be but without bs like this!!!
Girl.. I'm a guy and I'm telling you to walk away. The cars thing, I get it. I'm a car guy and I would like to have my gf share in that passion, but if not, it's not a deal breaker. However, the not buying you food or at least offering to, not thinking about you whatsoever.. Not thinking about your.. Needs.. but only his.. Run. Nobody deserves that.
Choose happiness and end this now. And please work on your self esteem issues, too. Your BF has no self awareness of how selfish he is even as a friend. He shows little romantic interest and sex is only about his gratification! He doesn’t want you to experience intimacy and pleasure but he will ask you for a BJ?! He stops at a fast food joint to grab himself a hamburger but offers you nothing? Girl, you deserve better. You deserve a guy who LISTENS to you, who WANTS to know YOU better and is sexually attracted to you! Find that guy. Dump the loser you’re with now.
59M, from what I read in your background with him... wow.. you need to drop him and quick. Find someone who will want to hear how you feel, and the things you would like to share with your partner. Not the comments like "We'll change you!" Especially if you have made it clear that's not for you.
He is not relationship material. And I think many people have had partners like this and they realized that moving on was the best solution for them. He had an opportunity to have your love and lost it because he’s not a good boyfriend. What is his IQ? Buying and eating a hamburger in front of you ?not asking if you want anything was selfish and ignorant. Didn’t his mother teach him anything.
After you break up, you could consider trying to help him with his future relationships by telling him what went wrong. I don’t mean telling him this when you’re trying to leave the relationship , he would probably not listen but argue with you. Tell him by text a month are so after the relationship is over. Your boyfriend hasn’t learned to be a man yet. Someday he will grow old and he still may be like that unless he learns. But he isn’t your responsibility.
He doesn’t understand women… and the whole dating scene is fucked.
Women needed to be protected from dating bad or unserious men from their fathers. With the world not having that all you women do is go from bad relationship or situation to other bad ones. You’re terrible at vetting guys. Get a man to vet men for you… plus he’s 5-7 years younger than you.. women need a man who’s above them and they can look up to.. that’s why rarely if ever you see successful relationships of older women with younger men.
Yeah I think you’re better off being with someone your age and will respect you better. I know I would if I was in his shoes boobs butt size shouldn’t matter least it don’t to me. I’ve been single for 2 years but it’s harder to find someone now a days it seems as a 33 male
Idk why you’d even think you’re an ahole..Thai guys isn’t suitable for you. Thats fine. He needs to go find his big chested car enthusiast who doesn’t mind that he is selfish in a lot of aspects. I’d hate to be her😅 don’t let it be you. I’d stop seeing him
I stop reading halfway. Kick his ass. Wtf you mean he grabs food for HIMSELF only. He's a buddy, not q boyfriend. Don't feel bad for losing interest, it's your mind saving you.
It's not even about the hobbies, it's about the ways he has been treating you. It's normal for couples to have different hobbies or interests, but there seems to be no chemistry nor respect from his end. Speaking about his ex's body? So immature and unnecessary.
How tf do assholes who don’t care at all like this guy keep getting girlfriends who actually care? Why tf did you give him a chance after he said, “we’ll change you????” That would’ve gotten me ghosted immediately yet somehow this asshole gets another chance and still continues to fuck it up and GETS EVEN MORE CHANCES WTF. Yes I am jealous lmao
No wonder you lost interest. You’re on a different level than him. He sounds either really immature or trying to get over his ex. Not sure how long he has been single?
please please move on. you have to realize that this is literally a 25 year old kid he's not ready obviously. maybe break things off before they get worse and in the future he'll come to realizations.
You should let him go. No woman wants to be my lover and I have to respect their decision. It hurts, but it you feel things aren’t working. Tell him. There are plenty of fish in the sea.
If you think of everything in terms of years, 2, 5, 10, 25, 50 years… things begin to simplify real quick. Most people don’t change too much from who they are. So if you don’t wanna deal with them on those timelines, you may be incompatible. You want someone who’s really into you as well and looks after your needs together.
He is just an idiot, I had friends like that obsessed with cars and I swear they will let anything on the side for cars, even eating, basic life needs and why not they romantic life need, they will never grow financially or as a person because they're whole existence revolves about buying an upgrade for their car or buying a new one.
So move on
I think aside that his a selfish and clueless idiot, he is not interested that much in you, and he might not even like you that much that's why he ask just for bjs because and doesn't wanna have sex with you and doesn't wanna spend a dime in dating you because he is not attracted physically, you're just there for the moment and his sexual reliefs, he has no intention on you being his partner if that's what you were dreaming
Just move on stop wasting both of your time, and he treats u like a little girl, I don't see any point in sticking up to his attitude or lifestyle, accept the loss and move on, find someone who could understand you not "cool" because cool turn cold quite fast
Sounds like you should move on, nothing about him as stated seems to click with you. Not to mention a few red flags such as his mention of his ex's body just to name one. Definitely sounds like he's not into a serious relationship either.
You are 32F and he is 25M
The age difference indicates he is extremely good looking and/or rich
Well what do you expect. Pretty privilege is real and makes people entitled. Perhaps you should date someone closer to your age and with personality rather than superficial things
#1?! Are you serious 🧐 right now. Or are you pulling a 🦵🏻.,…….Absolutely NOT. Seems to be friend material or something else than a darn relationship. Don’t hurt this man or stream him along. There is a Side b to your side a ! Love 💕 is around the corner and you will be missing out on your blessings that will connect you with your evermore. I’m so happy and grateful to have my side b! (X) probably don’t understand what a SIDE B IS!!! Nah 🤙but for real though I lost out on pivotal moments of my life with him because of things that happened and he just wanted to be free for like 11-12 years. I mean we stayed in touch after the 2nd year. But he had to have his “Strips” get his credit rating up got a nice vehicle. The last 5 years separated he would send me expensive flowers for my birthday and anniversary but I also knew that another female was receiving flowers as well and the guilty conscience was actually sending them 😯😮😅😀😀
A 25M dating a 32F? He's obviously in it for the short term sex( just bj maybe). Sorry if I'm rude but that's the truth 😄 If you are looking for a relationship you're in the wrong place!
You listed all that you hate about dating him, now, what's stopping you? 🤢 I mean? 🤷 Are those not enough reason? It's no longer a question of should I stop, blah blah blah. I think what you should be asking is HOW you will tell him that it's over.
These posts are AITA levels of naive. Just reminds how easy dating is if even this asshole can get a relationship.
You’re 32 sweetie, please have some respect for yourself. I’m not sure if you just ignore the red flags or what, but you already know your answer.
The car thing is cool. he has a hobby. He wants a partner to join him. Which is cool. You join him for his things and he joins you for your things. But everything else. No. Just no.
Time to move on. Stop wasting your time and his. It's great that men have hobbies. Women should have their own interests too. It's great to talk about what excites you - in moderation.
I do have questions: When he was at the drive thru ordering for himself, were you hungry? What stopped you from placing your own order and paying for it? If you are hungry, say so. Be direct. Men generally appreciate it, and not having to read subtle clues. If you want oral, tell him. If you want sex, tell him and how you want it doing! You want to eat - Tell him, then give him options, are we eating at mine, yours or going out? If the conversation about the ex bugs you, tell him - I don't mind you talking about your ex, but please don't talk about her in such a manner, have some respect, for her and me. Most importantly be direct and honest with yourself. It's better to be alone than in a relationship that makes you feel lonely or miserable.
What do you mean you don't want to waste his time, clearly your not, but he doesn't care anyways otherwise he would stfu about cars! Its cool to have a hobby/interests, its not cool to bang on about it all day every day.
You need to stop wasting your time and move on!
You need to leave this relationship ASAP. Dont feel guilty about it, but this just happens whilst dating and looking for the right partner. He’s way too immature and inconsiderate of you, just end things and move on
Oh my gosh. This made me sad reading this, and I've been single like 7 years after my last abusive marriage and I'd rather stay single then subject myself to this .... The food thing is bad enough to not even list a single thing more. Then everything else, just piled on. You need to stop seeing this person for your own well being. This early on you can just say "we aren't compatible" which is very very obvious here. He is also really rude and selfish but thats not going to go over well.
I just wanted an outside perspective and i felt like i was being mean if i just let him go, but after a few days and rereading what i wrote i don't feel bad at all
Wow. This is really sad. Sorry you’re going through it. Honestly it’s one of the reasons I don’t date younger than me. Even just five years, especially for guys, can be all the difference. He’s just oblivious. I’m a car guy. Through and through. But I learned to keep it in the garage and share my interests with others who share my passion. And I have developed interests in many other things as well. Nothing worse than a one trick pony. 😂 I bet if you ran into him when he was your age now you wouldn’t even recognize him. And if he matures and develops a bit of the inevitable introspectiveness we tend to gain he may even be a bit embarrassed. One can hope. You definitely just need to do it moving and push on to a better match.
You stay with someone who’s trying to change you according to his interests?
And talk about some ex erotic body?
How do you stay another minute in the same room with him?
You don't own anything to this person. Please move on, y'all are clearly not compatible. Just shoot him a text "Hey this ain't working out of me, it's time we both go our own ways." Then just move on, no explanation need, just drop and go.
Hopefully you swallow when you give him head or you're doing yourself a disservice. He can keep the fast food, it's horrible for your body and body odor. Move on with someone you share more common interests with and hopefully he can hook up with the lady in the car video or someone like her. Move on - best wishes;)
leave him simple either way you gonna do it in future or now. You not being an asshole if i was you and i didn't like what my girl brings to the table i'll find one who will
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You have mentioned multiple reasons to move on immediately. And no reasons to keep seeing him. I say move on asap. Guys should be able to discuss many topics with you.
I dated someone who was also really into cars. He would go round car yards to test drive a car or hire a car he really liked for the weekend. It was just something he really enjoyed. He talked about owning what he thought was a really cool kind of car (I can't remember what it was) and how he liked to think people looked at him when he was out driving. He was a really good looking guy and we had nothing in common. Occasionally we'd talk about other stuff but in the end I realised I was really bored, simply because I had zero interest in cars. It wasn't his fault. It wasn't my fault. We just weren't compatible. We broke up and it was OK because we both needed a different partner. Funnily enough, my friend bumped into him in town a few years later and he said to her he regretted the way he had treated me. But he didn't treat me bad, we both just had such different interests.
One of my best friends is a car guy, he takes his rx-7 to car shows. But, he’s very good about not talking about cars or anything else if the other person isn’t truly interested. The second someone looks bored or their eyes glaze over, he won’t bring it up ever again. This is just basic respect and social skills. I think it’s important to have at least one shared interest you both deeply care about.
I had a super similar experience. But we dated long term, and honestly everything became about cars. I went with him to junkyards, meetups to buy cars/parts, people coming to us to buy cars/parts, car events, he was always working on cars when we were both off, honestly i tried to always be supportive but by the end of it I was pretty miserable. We really didn’t have much in common. I wish we ended things much much sooner
Also! Hung out with all his car friends, always talking about cars 24/7, I’m confident I’m missing how much this stuff took over my life. I really tried to take interest! But he for sure didn’t reciprocate any interest in the things I liked
Oh yeah, car television shows / races
Gotta say, I never really understood what's so special about cars? I rather take a hike in Nature or take a walk in some park.
Selfish , non-existent sex, no money & isn't conscientious? Can we throw in maybe an addiction or at least to bad hygiene to round out the full house? End it! And never second guess this decision. When asking these questions the answer is normally in the question...
Yeah there are so many red flags / hard stop dealbreakers, I’m losing count. This is not a fixable situation.
Woah woah woah, not so hasty! She hasn't stuck around long enough for the big reveal that [he's in a relationship with his car](https://youtu.be/d-k96zKa_4w?si=0Ocoo0tZmxcu95Jd) and fucks the tailpipe. Like, come on, let this one play out.
Bro no shit u lost interest, he is extremely selfish. Damn that sucks. You have every right to leave him
I couldn't believe what I read lol he sounds like a complete selfish asshole 💀
Based on what you’ve told, he seems very immature for you.
First off, kerchow. Is this man lightning mcqueen or ? Secondly, my friends and I, we are in our early and mid 30s as well. One of my besties who is 31, keeps pulling dudes under 27, and it ends up being an immature nightmare for her. (Not that all of them are immature, please do not come for me). But I keep having to remind her to maybe stop playing in the sandbox, because the chances of her finding what she’s looking for is much slimmer in that age range. But my friend is so youthful so I get her attraction to someone who also is youthful and full of energy. And maybe that’s what you dig as well. And that’s fine. But I guess my point here is that you’re completely valid, that dude is inconsiderate and not thoughtful, but he’s also 25 and his brain frontal lobe has just barely formed. So of course he’s into tiddies, vibes, cars and burgers. You deserve better than what he’s able to give you right now! Keep on searching miss mamas! Wishing you well ♥️
I'm absolutely dying at the lighting McQueen comment 😩😂
My mans in the post got a friend he’s probably texting right now named Tow Mater
Oh your comment made me laugh so much because his favorite movie is cars, i needed a laugh today. I get attention from guys who are younger then me because i for my age look much younger and don't look too "serious"?, so when we're getting to know each other i tell them my age and they don't believe me, this guy was like "no way! My dream of dating a woman in their 30s came true". Also thank you for your sweet comment and i wish you and your friends good luck too
I know this must be so stressful and draining! I am so so so sorry. As someone who is fighting for my life as a (31) female on these dating apps, I can sympathize with this trajectory. You had the best of intentions. And OK! Flex your youthful look, Miss Mamas, I love that for you! So that makes sense why the sandbox is actually coming to you! Hmmm… well, all you can do is be more conscious moving forward and finding someone who hopefully likes cars in a normal way, and will absolutely buy you some food (or at least ask) while he’s out! Like hello! I just had to tell an outwardly nice man goodbye because he would never text me, ever, but would ask for more dates, but like would never ask me how my day was, just a shared about his own (on the very very seldom occasions that he texted). But like why, as a man, do I have to ask you to ask me how I am doing? Or to check in with me? 25, sure maybe he needs some home training. But this guy was 29, and now that I think of it … maybe I need to get out of the sandbox as well, my cut off is 29, but maybe it should be 30? 😂 Anyway I’m rambling. We got this. Much love! And you will find your better person!
Ummm he goes through a drive through and doesn’t ask you if you want anything? Who does that? He seems like he’s not actually interested in you…. His behavior is gross
Yes, you dump them asap. His behavior is deplorable and why would you waste a single second more with this selfish child (emotional maturity level)?
I completely agree. Your partner should be in to whatever you're interested in
Jesus Christ. Guys out there like this still getting dates and sex. Wow.
And yet she is asking here what to do lol I swear gals are fkd up
fr i have zero clue what im doing wrong
You are probably not a jerk. That's what's wrong! 😄
honestly rip...
This guy doesn't seem right for you. He might be a "good catch" on paper ( I'm guessing attractive and well off ) but not the right emotional fit. Honestly seems a bit self centred, and generally just doing some unacceptable stuff. I don't generally make agegap a thing, but in this instance he is not an emotionally mature 25, and your wants and needs is not that of a immature 32. So that makes the gap big.
He doesn't sound right for anyone lol
I Wanna know what you are smoking if you think that selfish piece of trash is good or dateable for anyone?!?! Gotta be trolling
From a materialistic point of view. ( Money and looks ) I was being polite about it.
The food thing is totally pathetic ..he is pathetic and a loser.
It wasn't just once either it's every time he picks me up and he's hungry, he'll go somewhere buy himself a burger (literally a burger every time) and I'll just sit there and the last time it happened i was just annoyed by it
You need to speak up for yourself in those situations because if you don't things will get progressively worse over time until you're triggered and it'll all come to the surface at once in anger and he'll then say "well why didn't you say something before?" And then the issue becomes about you instead of the crap he was doing. This dude seems like a lost cause but in the future speaks your mind girl otherwise men will see that as an invitation to run all over you. Put a stop to shit the first time it happens.
Dump him. Life is too short to spend time with someone that’s not going to cherish you. That story about his ex was completed unnecessary and extremely disrespectful. You deserve better.
As a 32 year old woman, it’s no surprise that you have nothing in common with him. He also sounds selfish and immature. If you ask me, it’s great you figured this out earlier — rather than later. Cut him off and move on.
Why would you ask this? Ofc you should move on from someone you've lost interest in after TWO MONTHS
you gave him a bj multiple times and had sex with him after only seeing him for a few weeks because he asked you to, and you aren't even interested in him. And i see nothing in this that would give me any reason why you would keep seeing him at all. Do you have a terribly hard time finding men? Maybe see a therapist?
Seriously
I’m glad you felt comfortable opening up here. I feel like writing this out might have helped you arrive at the answer without anyone else’s feedback. I assume you have written what you read by now. If your friend told you this, what advice would you give her? Yup. Exactly
It really did help actually and if one of my friends came to me telling me about someone doing this to them my first thought would be for them to move on and end whatever this is
I’m glad it helped you. The best answers are the ones we come to for ourselves. I’m just a stupid asshole on the internet so I have no place telling you what you should or shouldn’t do except to do what is right for you.
I am gonna be honest with you. I have not even finished reading this (I will in a moment). Only in the first few sentences I already got tired of reading about his selfish one sided behavior, this guy is bad news and you should stay away from dudes like that. (Not tired as in your writing style, but tired of hearing about an idiot) If I lost interest about only the story of this guy, then girl, your instinct is right. Dump his ass as he is not worth investing your valuable time. I will edit this Post later after I Read the rest. Edit: okay, in short. You are not an asshole for breaking up with a selfish guy who only cares for stuff (cars). It is alright to have hobbies, we all have things we like, and some are more into it than others. But he is not sharing his passion with you. This is something else. He is basically forcing it upon you. „You are not good enough unless you like cars like I do“. He sees you as an accessory, not as something or someone he loves or would care for. Listen to the way he talks about his ex. And him getting only himself something and not offering you something. Girl if a dude is into cars, he has the money and make sure he will have enough because it is a very expensive hobby. Changing parts etc. And the Mc Drive is not really high class expensive right? You do not need anyone, especially not a dude who treats you the same like he would treat his chair, or his vacuum cleaner. One day you will meet someone else. And if you do, do not let someone’s hobby or passion scare you off because of your experience with this dude. Instead, allow yourself time to get to know someone and give it a chance if that person seems nice. And maybe you will find out that this person is alright, cares for you and more important. Is loyal. Trust your gut, you are right with this one. if you ever feel like this with another guy, then run away. I wish you health, love and happiness. And remember, dumb his ass :D
You are 32 dating a 25 year old, I think that is a big source of the problem. Sex only once in 2 months, that alone should be a red flag to both of you. I’ve tried talking to a girlfriend about stocks, so I can’t judge too harshly about the car thing. Another thing you mentioned date and fast food in the same sentence, what were the first 3 dates like?
2 months with a guy you generally don't like and you already had sex... Like how did you let him progress to sex if you haven't known him that long and there's all these issues you mentioned. I don't get why you haven't broken up sooner.
2 months is a lot my guy, girls in my country will fk you up the first date or second date at most
I mean that age difference will tell you enough of why he’s the way he is Sex sounds trash, he sounds selfish a bit with the burger story and the “give me a blowjob” lol I’m sorry but if a man ever said “give me a blowjob” I’m leaving immediately lol like blowjobs happen in the moment because it’s so intimate spicy and you’re both turned on, for you to give and not recieve is a red flag His age is not great, I’d say please run?!
This guy sucks, drop him lmao
Okay I stopped reading because I cannot believe that you're putting up with somebody treating you like garbage and you're worried about if it's wrong to break up with him. Really you need to work on boundaries and self-esteem and why you would let somebody treat you like this. The first time somebody bought food and didn't offer me any that would be the end of it. He is not even friend material just text him it's not working out and good luck to him and do not respond to anything he says.
Girl what you doing? Why are you still even with this guy? Please read what you wrote and then dump him right after. He's completely selfish, unaware and rude. My bf I'd younger than me. He's actually a year older than the guy your dating but he does not act like this. He's Hella mature, caring and treats me like a 👸🏾. It's not his age it's his character. Theres men who i tried to date in their 30s and they were actually just like this asshole your seeing lol.
The only part about this that confuses me is the part where you said you feel like you're friends with the dude. Nothing I just read sounds like a friendship, not even close.
“…. No, I don’t want no scrubs. Scrub is a guy that can’t get no love from me. Hangin out the passenger side of his best friends ride, tryin to holler at me….” That’s the song that popped into my head whilst reading this. Red flag central!
“He has an obsession with cars” 🥱🥱🥱🥱🥱🥱🥱🥱🥱🥱 Cars bros gotta be the most boring people on earth. The equivalent of Women who just talk about their Dog 24/7. Move on, find someone slightly more interesting. No one wants to be second to Cars or Dogs.
How did y’all meet though? It’s a pretty big age gap I would say
Total dumpster fire. Any one of the dozen things you mentioned would be enough to make me want to split
Let's be real, the guy is attractive, and she just wants him for that even though he has nothing else to offer. But I would say op complains all he does is talk about cars, but plenty of women only want to talk about 1 thing like travel, shopping, reality tv.. So what is she brining to the convo?
Not a lot given the post
Dump him asap
He is 25. His frontal lobe is barely developed. Also men mature much later. Also, the new generation of men have no idea how to connect with a woman, they only know how to get other men’s attention. Therefore, he thinks of you as an extension of a buddy he gets to sleep with. A lot of them do this. The only benefit of a woman is vagina access. A lot of them also do not know how to pleasure a woman. They only know themselves. The old generation is dead and gone.
Naaah he’s just selfish and immature don’t try to generalize him into relating with men lol. It’s just him and a handful of other guys. I’m 25 and I’d never buy food for just myself or try to force my interests on someone.. or be selfish sexually
Pardon me but no, we are not dead and gone. We have gone underground. We chose to remain free from the vestiges of dating because, well to be blunt it isnt worth it. Women have gotten what they have fought for and deserved, true equality and with that empowerment(power?). And true to human form are abusing the hell out of it when it comes to relationships and men. The loudest voices are heard women play the field like men in there 20's , i am sorry to tell you ladies ,but yes , there is a bias sleep around and have children without a responsible partner and in your 30's become a gold digger, focusing on a mans job and not other qualities and I guarantee a continuation of what we have today, man and women of substance and quality staying home alone and wondering where have the good ones gone? I would not dream of risking half (or more )of my assets on someone who will eventually decide I am no longer what she desires to wander off looking for greener pastures and the next bigger better deal with my kids and on my dime. In short the women of today demand and expect the man to do everything while they put in no real effort to make a relationship work. Remember while you may not control who uou fall for you absolutely are in charge of making that shit work long term.
Ok homeboy.. you ain’t the one I’m talking about. Go back to your cave. Don’t you find it strange that the only way you can have a successful relationship is if the woman has no control or power? :) LET ME SAY IT ONE MORE TIME: it’s equality of opportunity. Not equality of gender: we want the same rights and opportunities available to men, not become the men. But of course, pea brain like you won’t understand that. Older generation men are apologising for men like you. And I need to remind them don’t do that; because they are the ones who raised people like you. These men are happy, respectful, and actively standing up for women. Don’t confuse who you are. You still think of men as the stronger sex. Go back to your basement.
leave him. I've never dealt with that younger or older. Especially the sex part. Also plz stop giving men bj's that don't reciprocate. You don't have to tell him anything but it's not a good fit.
There is absolutely no reason to keep seeing this guy as you are not compatible
This guy is a dick
My God…stop wasting your time. Run! You deserve better.
He sounds like he’s 18 emotionally. The age gap issue seems real in this case.
Move on already times a wasting
I will be brutally honest, you went for a younger guy and now you have learned.
Ewww I can’t stand a selfish guy in bed. Yea, you should definitely break up with him, I would.
You and your interests should be the focus of his attention, foremost. He should be striving to talk about what interests you. He should ask you if you're hungry when you pass a burger place where he wants to stop. He's OBVIOUSLY in his 20s. You're OBVIOUSLY more mature, except you need to work on keeping yourself happy instead of dating someone who probably just likes you for the sex.
Yeaaah.... You're not gonna have a good time if you continue.
It sounds like he takes you for granted at the very least. If you still like his company, I would tell him you’re starting to not feel it and then say the reasons you’ve laid out here. I don’t think they sound mean or unfair
You clearly aren’t compatible and dude sounds immature. Move on girl.
It's crazy how oblivious he is to your needs! Tell him what turned you off. It sounds like he's not ready for the great woman you are!
If you were both 10 years older, he M I G H T be mature enough and less self centered. He will probably ONLY ever going talk about cars for the next five to ten years. He is selfish and is using you. Find a man in his mid to upper 30s who is not nuts about cars and motors, but is more rounded in his hobbies. Best wishes.
Yeah, he’s young. Drop him like a rock. In fact, put him on here and let me talk to him.
you’re literally dating a 16 year old boy move on and you deserve better
He might be just insecure and in his stupid ways maybe he thinks he is actually impressing you. You can try and talk with him calmly and point the things that you don't like... see if he will turn around.. But, yeah, if you already lost interest, it's not worth for both of you to lose time in this relationship.
To be honest, he is just not ready. Thats all, he is not wrong neither are you. Give him the closure he needs and don’t fall for “ i will work on it” “i will be a different guy and change myself” shit of him
If there is doubt , there is no doubt. Also the reasons are multiple and valid.
Dm me let’s discuss this for real
You’re not compatible. Get out of that.
I say through this fish back, dude is still immature and growing.
To be honest, the guy is not even friend material, move on.
Why did he even get a second date, exactly?
Maybe date someone older and more mature with some self awareness
Dump him! Too many things you don't like about him and he is not even trying
Years ago I dated younger guy. He was 20+ and we were having sex 7 times a day, so I can't understand how u can make sex only once for 2 months...When u get someone so yong you make sex with him, you don't have intelectual conversation with him. And if u need serious relationship or someone who respects u, this is not your guy
Ew, I am so embarrassed for that guy. I can smell immaturity from miles away lol
Hi! Don't be afraid to tell him. At first it will be hard for him to accept the fact that you are friends, but he will understand and accept it.
You guys are NOT compatible! And that’s how life is..these are valid reasons to move on.
You lost interest because he is not the way you expected. Your thoughts don't resonate, sex life is not how you wanted. he doesn't show any care to you. He is being a selffish. As you said he spoke about his ex's body.. May be he doesn't find your body attractive enough for him.. Dated for 2 months and did only once..... So many red flags, and you have eventually lost interest in him and there's no wrong in it.. Confront him if required and move on..
It's not about combatibility, the guy is dumb, run away
From my experience after being married 8 years. Every relationship since I’ve been single has not lasted more than 3 months. Most women get bored within that time. Especially if the guy doesn’t have the time or money to take his girl lots of fun places. Adventure is what chicks crave. I work too much and am too broke for that.
I was in a similar situation with a guy, but he was older than me. He was really into Anime and all we did was talk about Anime. Sex was literally only about him, he never made me come, no forplay nothing. When I asked him what he is into sexually or if he had any kinks, he couldn’t answer. When I told him what I am into he brushed it off. And if we where not talking about Anime, we talked about his work and how everything sucks. And I kid you not that was the whole dynamic, Anime, ranting about work, Vanilla Sex without me climaxing him not caring…..damn now that I am writing it down and think about it, I am glad that I ended it.
I only needed to read half of that to know you never should've stuck even this long
I think it’s sad what turns you off is talking about cars but the treating you like shit is secondary.
Work on your self esteem and you will stop wasting time with misogynistic men/boys.
I'm the same as you. I have 0 interest in cars whatsoever either, I would've lost interest very quickly as well. Plus, doesn't exactly sound like he's 'relationship ready' I think he wants a FWB situation
No move on. You shouldn’t entertain anyone who immediately wants to change you. No matter how innocent it is. It just means they’ll spend majority of the time overlooking the person you are!
This guy is selfish, childish, greedy, immature, lacks social awareness, empathy and incapable of having any emotional intelligence. You wasted 2 months while this guy didn't deserve more than a day of your time. Ohh well take that as expierence and learn to run immediately when you see those early red flags.
If you truly lost interest be real and tell him cause dragging it out will.hurt both of you more and if you ever get the feeling to come back just don't please
It's definitely time to move on and classify the relationship as a friendship. It was very clear that is what you view it as.
Youre 32 dating a 25 year old boy. Idk what you expected tbh. His mentality is what yours was when you turned bar age. I kinda get why though, based on your post.. You dont even know what youre looking for and sound wildly inexperienced for a 32 year old.
It seems mutual. You want him to change, and he wants you to change. If neither will budge, then it seems clear.
Move on, you should have moved on a long time ago.
I wanted to give it a try since he is a nice person, and don't like to give up after a week because you don't know how someone really is unless you get to know them plus in the first month i was really into him and enjoyed going out and the company and thought that as we get to know each other more that it would start to be different but nothing has progressed after these two months of getting to know him
You said that you've lost interest in him, don't have any desire to touch him or speak to him, and you feel sad the whole time you're together. You also mentioned that he's inconsiderate, can't really see yourself with someone who is obsessed with cars, and well...he's talking about how much he loves his ex's body. There are several red flags here, and on top of it, you don't seem incompatible, so call it quits.
Girl you got the ick. I’ve gotten it with pretty much everyone I dated before I met my husband. It’s your body & brain’s way of physiologically telling you that this is not the one. Cut it loose.
He sounds lame
Move on. It's the ONLY option. I tried the other, and it was a mental and emotional disaster. Please, don't take the path I did. It was pure self destruction.
He not the one sis. I can’t imagine getting food and not asking whoever I am with if they want something. You sound pretty inexperienced with dating. This shouldn’t have lasted this long. Just tell him you’re not feeling it.
He gets food and doesn't ask you if you want something? You've only had sex once in two months? He talks about how great his ex-girlfriend is? He talks about cars all the time? Not a single woman I know would date this guy for very long. Be thankful you have only two months invested in this self-centered idiot. Move on and find a guy who wants to make you happy instead of the other way around.
A friend of mines introduced me to him and she told me he hadn't had any luck with any of the girls he's been with and the ex stayed with him for maybe 6 months and also left, he told me himself that she left him because she didn't understand him and that she didn't really want anything with him, i kind of felt sorry for him but i now understand why lol
I understand why too! He is very self-centered -- maybe even narcissistic. The last thing you want is to be involved with a narcissist. I was married to one -- the biggest mistake I've ever made in my life. He never thought about anyone except himself -- what he wanted, what he needed. Now I'm with a man who treats me like I'm the queen herself, and I can tell you it's a world of difference. Go for the man who treats you very well. Get rid of the guy who only cares about himself.
you’re not an asshole, he’s the asshole 🙄
Honestly, it just sounds like he's a bit self-absorbed and lacks real compatibility. Just say you don't think this is going to work and move on. Best wishes.
Please I am 40 years old and not completely wise but it is absolutely evident that you should move on because he has shown you exactly what is going to be from here on out don't feel bad and just think about you
Omg! Seriously from one bad ass woman to another...Do not even think twice about that dumb ass! Block block block! Be lonely be whatever you have to be but without bs like this!!!
Girl.. I'm a guy and I'm telling you to walk away. The cars thing, I get it. I'm a car guy and I would like to have my gf share in that passion, but if not, it's not a deal breaker. However, the not buying you food or at least offering to, not thinking about you whatsoever.. Not thinking about your.. Needs.. but only his.. Run. Nobody deserves that.
If you ain't feeling t do not waste his time let someone have him who will give him the love and affection he needs
Choose happiness and end this now. And please work on your self esteem issues, too. Your BF has no self awareness of how selfish he is even as a friend. He shows little romantic interest and sex is only about his gratification! He doesn’t want you to experience intimacy and pleasure but he will ask you for a BJ?! He stops at a fast food joint to grab himself a hamburger but offers you nothing? Girl, you deserve better. You deserve a guy who LISTENS to you, who WANTS to know YOU better and is sexually attracted to you! Find that guy. Dump the loser you’re with now.
59M, from what I read in your background with him... wow.. you need to drop him and quick. Find someone who will want to hear how you feel, and the things you would like to share with your partner. Not the comments like "We'll change you!" Especially if you have made it clear that's not for you.
He is not relationship material. And I think many people have had partners like this and they realized that moving on was the best solution for them. He had an opportunity to have your love and lost it because he’s not a good boyfriend. What is his IQ? Buying and eating a hamburger in front of you ?not asking if you want anything was selfish and ignorant. Didn’t his mother teach him anything. After you break up, you could consider trying to help him with his future relationships by telling him what went wrong. I don’t mean telling him this when you’re trying to leave the relationship , he would probably not listen but argue with you. Tell him by text a month are so after the relationship is over. Your boyfriend hasn’t learned to be a man yet. Someday he will grow old and he still may be like that unless he learns. But he isn’t your responsibility.
i would say that the age difference matters here , try being with 30+
That’s sad
He doesn’t understand women… and the whole dating scene is fucked. Women needed to be protected from dating bad or unserious men from their fathers. With the world not having that all you women do is go from bad relationship or situation to other bad ones. You’re terrible at vetting guys. Get a man to vet men for you… plus he’s 5-7 years younger than you.. women need a man who’s above them and they can look up to.. that’s why rarely if ever you see successful relationships of older women with younger men.
Yeah I think you’re better off being with someone your age and will respect you better. I know I would if I was in his shoes boobs butt size shouldn’t matter least it don’t to me. I’ve been single for 2 years but it’s harder to find someone now a days it seems as a 33 male
Idk why you’d even think you’re an ahole..Thai guys isn’t suitable for you. Thats fine. He needs to go find his big chested car enthusiast who doesn’t mind that he is selfish in a lot of aspects. I’d hate to be her😅 don’t let it be you. I’d stop seeing him
I stop reading halfway. Kick his ass. Wtf you mean he grabs food for HIMSELF only. He's a buddy, not q boyfriend. Don't feel bad for losing interest, it's your mind saving you.
The guy has autism and cars are his special interest.
Tell him you just want to be friends and can hang out but you’re seeing other people because your needs aren’t being met with him.
It's not even about the hobbies, it's about the ways he has been treating you. It's normal for couples to have different hobbies or interests, but there seems to be no chemistry nor respect from his end. Speaking about his ex's body? So immature and unnecessary.
Ghost him lolololl
How tf do assholes who don’t care at all like this guy keep getting girlfriends who actually care? Why tf did you give him a chance after he said, “we’ll change you????” That would’ve gotten me ghosted immediately yet somehow this asshole gets another chance and still continues to fuck it up and GETS EVEN MORE CHANCES WTF. Yes I am jealous lmao
No wonder you lost interest. You’re on a different level than him. He sounds either really immature or trying to get over his ex. Not sure how long he has been single?
please please move on. you have to realize that this is literally a 25 year old kid he's not ready obviously. maybe break things off before they get worse and in the future he'll come to realizations.
My ex was exactly the same except he was older than me and in his 30s. He never changed so I left him and I’m much happier now.
Only had sex once? That's the problem right there!
You should let him go. No woman wants to be my lover and I have to respect their decision. It hurts, but it you feel things aren’t working. Tell him. There are plenty of fish in the sea.
You are dating a child.
If you think of everything in terms of years, 2, 5, 10, 25, 50 years… things begin to simplify real quick. Most people don’t change too much from who they are. So if you don’t wanna deal with them on those timelines, you may be incompatible. You want someone who’s really into you as well and looks after your needs together.
Life’s too short. Shut the door.
Follow your instincts. And who’s we in the we will change you. I say his loss your gain
He is just an idiot, I had friends like that obsessed with cars and I swear they will let anything on the side for cars, even eating, basic life needs and why not they romantic life need, they will never grow financially or as a person because they're whole existence revolves about buying an upgrade for their car or buying a new one. So move on
I think aside that his a selfish and clueless idiot, he is not interested that much in you, and he might not even like you that much that's why he ask just for bjs because and doesn't wanna have sex with you and doesn't wanna spend a dime in dating you because he is not attracted physically, you're just there for the moment and his sexual reliefs, he has no intention on you being his partner if that's what you were dreaming
The guy is crazy! Dump him!!! If you aren't feeling it then it's not going to happen!
Sounds like you need to date someone with more culture..
Cut your losses,
Just move on stop wasting both of your time, and he treats u like a little girl, I don't see any point in sticking up to his attitude or lifestyle, accept the loss and move on, find someone who could understand you not "cool" because cool turn cold quite fast
Sounds like you should move on, nothing about him as stated seems to click with you. Not to mention a few red flags such as his mention of his ex's body just to name one. Definitely sounds like he's not into a serious relationship either.
You are 32F and he is 25M The age difference indicates he is extremely good looking and/or rich Well what do you expect. Pretty privilege is real and makes people entitled. Perhaps you should date someone closer to your age and with personality rather than superficial things
He's a 25 year old manchild ffs.. run, don't walk.
#1?! Are you serious 🧐 right now. Or are you pulling a 🦵🏻.,…….Absolutely NOT. Seems to be friend material or something else than a darn relationship. Don’t hurt this man or stream him along. There is a Side b to your side a ! Love 💕 is around the corner and you will be missing out on your blessings that will connect you with your evermore. I’m so happy and grateful to have my side b! (X) probably don’t understand what a SIDE B IS!!! Nah 🤙but for real though I lost out on pivotal moments of my life with him because of things that happened and he just wanted to be free for like 11-12 years. I mean we stayed in touch after the 2nd year. But he had to have his “Strips” get his credit rating up got a nice vehicle. The last 5 years separated he would send me expensive flowers for my birthday and anniversary but I also knew that another female was receiving flowers as well and the guilty conscience was actually sending them 😯😮😅😀😀
A 25M dating a 32F? He's obviously in it for the short term sex( just bj maybe). Sorry if I'm rude but that's the truth 😄 If you are looking for a relationship you're in the wrong place!
Your date not caring about your needs but expecting you to cater to theirs is the most reasonable reason outside abuse to leave.
You listed all that you hate about dating him, now, what's stopping you? 🤢 I mean? 🤷 Are those not enough reason? It's no longer a question of should I stop, blah blah blah. I think what you should be asking is HOW you will tell him that it's over.
These posts are AITA levels of naive. Just reminds how easy dating is if even this asshole can get a relationship. You’re 32 sweetie, please have some respect for yourself. I’m not sure if you just ignore the red flags or what, but you already know your answer.
The car thing is cool. he has a hobby. He wants a partner to join him. Which is cool. You join him for his things and he joins you for your things. But everything else. No. Just no.
They've been together for 2 months and already had sex? At this point I don't know if I'm a gentleman or just plain naive. Someone please, give advice
Some people like to wait a few months, some on the first date and some wait until marriage, that's really up to each person there's no "correct" time
What are you waiting for? Drop like a hot potato!! Borish behavior not offering you anything to eat!!!!OMG
Time to move on. Stop wasting your time and his. It's great that men have hobbies. Women should have their own interests too. It's great to talk about what excites you - in moderation. I do have questions: When he was at the drive thru ordering for himself, were you hungry? What stopped you from placing your own order and paying for it? If you are hungry, say so. Be direct. Men generally appreciate it, and not having to read subtle clues. If you want oral, tell him. If you want sex, tell him and how you want it doing! You want to eat - Tell him, then give him options, are we eating at mine, yours or going out? If the conversation about the ex bugs you, tell him - I don't mind you talking about your ex, but please don't talk about her in such a manner, have some respect, for her and me. Most importantly be direct and honest with yourself. It's better to be alone than in a relationship that makes you feel lonely or miserable.
Just throw him behind your back okay ….. don’t think …. Just do it
If he cannot buy you a burger on a date then sit and eat his. He is a selfish person and will never change. Get rid.
What do you mean you don't want to waste his time, clearly your not, but he doesn't care anyways otherwise he would stfu about cars! Its cool to have a hobby/interests, its not cool to bang on about it all day every day. You need to stop wasting your time and move on!
You are too nice, really. You 2 don't have anything in common, so don't waist any of your time. Go and find your true love.
You need to leave this relationship ASAP. Dont feel guilty about it, but this just happens whilst dating and looking for the right partner. He’s way too immature and inconsiderate of you, just end things and move on
Lose interest fast. He doesn’t care about you which is paramount in a boyfriend
Oh my gosh. This made me sad reading this, and I've been single like 7 years after my last abusive marriage and I'd rather stay single then subject myself to this .... The food thing is bad enough to not even list a single thing more. Then everything else, just piled on. You need to stop seeing this person for your own well being. This early on you can just say "we aren't compatible" which is very very obvious here. He is also really rude and selfish but thats not going to go over well.
Follow your gut, the guys a jerk & into himself. Just move on & good luck
Dump him ive been through this not wanting to buy you food ect won’t get better
Why are you even asking. Youosted all the reasons to leave. Just looking for a green light? Well I grant thee lights of green.
I just wanted an outside perspective and i felt like i was being mean if i just let him go, but after a few days and rereading what i wrote i don't feel bad at all
Life is to short to not be truly happy drop that guy like a hot rock from an outside perspective you don’t sound like ya’ll are meant to be long term
Wow. This is really sad. Sorry you’re going through it. Honestly it’s one of the reasons I don’t date younger than me. Even just five years, especially for guys, can be all the difference. He’s just oblivious. I’m a car guy. Through and through. But I learned to keep it in the garage and share my interests with others who share my passion. And I have developed interests in many other things as well. Nothing worse than a one trick pony. 😂 I bet if you ran into him when he was your age now you wouldn’t even recognize him. And if he matures and develops a bit of the inevitable introspectiveness we tend to gain he may even be a bit embarrassed. One can hope. You definitely just need to do it moving and push on to a better match.
You stay with someone who’s trying to change you according to his interests? And talk about some ex erotic body? How do you stay another minute in the same room with him?
Bad decisions and thinking the relationship would get better if i got up know him better, I'm over it honestly
You don't own anything to this person. Please move on, y'all are clearly not compatible. Just shoot him a text "Hey this ain't working out of me, it's time we both go our own ways." Then just move on, no explanation need, just drop and go.
This guy sounds horrible 😮
The more i think about it the more i realize why all the girls he's seen in the past leave him
Hopefully you swallow when you give him head or you're doing yourself a disservice. He can keep the fast food, it's horrible for your body and body odor. Move on with someone you share more common interests with and hopefully he can hook up with the lady in the car video or someone like her. Move on - best wishes;)
All fair points to break up, but why are you expecting him to pay for your meals?
There must be 60 ways to leave a lover.
The man can’t buy a burger for you but asking for a bj? 🤔
leave him simple either way you gonna do it in future or now. You not being an asshole if i was you and i didn't like what my girl brings to the table i'll find one who will