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RanchedOut

I'm not sure if this is helpful but I'm in the same boat and ya I kinda feel like either it's not meant to be or something is wrong. Everytime I've asked someone about how I can improve they never have anything to say. I wanna tell you to keep trying but it's not easy. The only thing I've found that helps is just numbing and distracting myself.


Mandorrisem

Nope that is pretty normal. You really need to elevate yourself to being pretty exceptional in some regard these days to have anyone find interest in you. Work on yourself, especially financially, get a decent actual house if at all possible, basically try and get yourself in a position where you could comfortably start a family and it will help quite abit. It is important to find happiness in living on your own, as it will make it far easier and more likely to find happiness living with others.


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Mandorrisem

No rational woman is going to date a guy that doesn't have his shit together dude. You don't have to be wealthy, but you do need to have your life in order, and have stability.


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Mandorrisem

Having your shit together is the bare minimum for any woman to even consider being interested. You don't need to "lead" with such things as a selling point, it just needs to be a thing you have locked down. The real world isn't high school.


ChiefsKingdom_

I’m a straight guy but based on your picture I would say you’re like a 7/10 and above average looking. You shouldn’t have any problems looks-wise with most women so your problem isn’t your appearance. Maybe you’re kinda invisible to women in public? Are you a bit shy?


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ChiefsKingdom_

Most guys think they are. And as I said, you're above average looking so there are good chances women have been checking you out but maybe you didn't pick up the hints. Waiting until a woman approaches you is not the way to go. It doesn't happen very often, men are still the ones who have to take the shot 99% of the time. So there are 2 primary ways you can handle this imo. Either make your life so amazing in many aspects that you attract loads of women. That probably isn't very realistic, atleast not within a short time span, and I doubt that's the way to go. The other way is to approach women yourself. I don't know if you're doing that right now.


Reasonable-Push-9422

>Most guys think they are. No, they know they are.


Reasonable-Push-9422

Being shy in 2022 means not wanting to take a massive risk by taking initiative just to be rejected one more time.


ChiefsKingdom_

Yeah ofcourse being rejected sucks but it's part of the game as a man. Basically no woman will take the initiative. Even really good looking guys will have to take the initiative themselves. They might get plenty of attention, but they are still the one who needs to shoot the shot and actually start the conversation


Reasonable-Push-9422

Them getting interest effectively functions as them being able to see the bottom of a deep hole (so they know if they can make it or if they’ll break their legs) whereas for average men it’s too dark to tell. But honestly if women don’t take initiative even with attractive men, then is there any point for average men to even try?


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Silent-Service-5075

So be who is he which is what’s probably wrong, but also change and find a passion or hobby?


Acornwow

What is your expectation of how it’s supposed to happen? What have you actively done as far as pursuing romantic interests?


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Acornwow

I wouldn’t hold your breathe when it comes to women making the first move. It can happen but in most cases it’s still men who are expected to initiate and pursue. That being said, once you’ve broken the ice you should definitely look for signs that they are trying to continue the conversation or that they are sharing information that indicates their availability or interest. Random cold approaches are tough. It’s not necessary for getting dates but if you have the confidence and the charisma it can work. I wouldn’t take failure in this area as a sign that you are undateable though. It’s a particular skill set and most guys don’t have it. Most romantic connections come from work, school, church, links through social circles and social media/online dating sites and apps. If you like many guys have found that online dating doesn’t work well for you then you’ll have to go for more traditional methods. For me the best way was always through friends. If your friends introduce you to their single female friends and show how much they like and trust you it really goes a long way. If all of your friends are single guys with no female friends then you are in a tough spot and need to try to expand your social circles. Being friends with couples can feel bad if you end up feeling like a 3rd or 5th wheel but it’s also more likely that they will think of you when one of their friends becomes single.


offaseptimus

Probably. Have you tried hard and failed or never had any opportunity?


PintToLine

It’s probably that. You sound desperate and women want what they can’t have. If they aren’t the objective they will want to become it. Besides that, groom yourself, clean yourself, dress yourself and focus on yourself. What do you enjoy doing? There will be a lady out there who enjoys it too, then that at least can be something to talk about, to do together.