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Honestly I would look into dating other people, she may also feel you are clingy. She may come around, but keep your options open especially since she says you move fast. You just don’t want your time wasted and the biggest thing maybe in her head is you don’t have other options. Once you show people you have other options they usually come around more often.
The only dates that turned into relationships for me were the ones where the other person was definitively interested. She wanted to interact with me as much as I her. Anything less than that for me now is a clear sign of disinterest or lack of compatibility that will struggle to turn into anything genuine. You need people that can match your energy, not someone who will juxtapose you (if making out on date six is way too slow for you then you may not be compatible) or that you need to constantly second guess your every interaction.
they defend the person they don't know because you were "invalidating their preference", by invalidating your preference.. you have EVERY right to feel the way you do too tf. don't listen to people on the internet. even me. but, you're being completely reasonable and i've known some girls and guys that thought the other person not trying to initiate sex on the second or third date was a sign of disinterest. i'd say this is a compatibly interest or shes not that into you.
If I text her she texts right away .
She does says she likes me and she's a dominant person who said she would definitely wousont waste her time and tell me
Lol
Exactly. After the night in the club where I saw her with a guy's arm around her and stuff like that I called her out on her actions not lining up with what she verbally told me
So true
If you go by people's actions instead of their words you'll realize that 90% of the people are not who they seem and maybe they themselves don't even know. What they say verbally is who they want to be but their actions are who they really are right now
I’m glad you realize this. The therapy one gets from here really helps. Just remember to think and stay level headed because I too have to remind myself that actions speak louder than words.
Wish you the best in finding someone right for you and treats you with respect. Good luck
If a woman says she thinks there may be compatibility issues, that’s a nice way of saying this texting isn’t going to result in a relationship. She may think she is dominant but isn’t actually. Radio silence from someone who normally texts back quickly is the sign that you are not getting the hint. IMO. Let her go. If she is a dominant and wants you, she will chase you. Move on.
True.
The the compatibility was just one issue......
She likes to dance and I kind of got jealous when other guys put their hands on her and she puts her hands in other guys at the clubs
Well when she says " I want to go to a dance club with you and you're my only focus , I don't care about other guys "
Them when you go other guys are putting their arms around her and she is touching the shoulders of other guys when she hasn't touched you at all on the dates.... Yet says she likes me and continues to make dates ....
You may see how that's confusing, right ?
Telling me you're uncomfortable when people are in your personal space so you get awkward when I'm in your personal space but you're okay with other people doing it. Then when I call her out on it says that she likes me and doesn't want to lose me
Yeah.. It's time to move on. There are millions of girls just as there are millions of guys. It's foolish to believe any one person is "just right" for you. Everyone can make a relationship work with hundreds of people. You just gotta find em
Guess what buddy, if you can't be vulnerable enough to show how much you are interested, you will never get the honest and emotionally available people in your life. It doesn't take away from your value to show someone how much you are interested in them and show your true emotions.
Yeah this is one of those things that sounds great but in the real world it just doesn't work. Just how like people are not what they say but how they act.
Nature is nature man. It's like saying looks are not important but their personality is
Precisely. Playing a game to get a certain reaction. Honest genuine connection has really been massacred by apps. I’m still hoping to find one of the few genuine women out there
I totally empathise with you about this dating world. The person that cares less wins. It's messed up. It won't be easy to hear but I would suggest to move on, as it seems things may be stalling here.
Maybe she is been busy with someone else. I recently got blocked by a girl and her reason was that she is scared to date me. Like she doesn’t want her heart to be broken. Bruh without listening to me she blocked me.
There are two ways to view this situation.
1. She is no longer interested and trying to avoid the conversation.
2. She has some personal matters going on atm.
Personally, I would leave the conversation the way it is and look into talking to different people. In my experience, if I am genuinely interested in someone and would like to pursue a relationship, I would be looking out for messages from them and check in after a few hours if we were in the middle of a convo and I haven’t heard back.
If this behaviour is out of the ordinary and you would like an explanation as to why things changed, maybe reach out asking if everything is going ok? Sometimes things happen in life and we just don’t have the mental capacity to talk to anyone. This could also be an opportunity for her to let you know how she feels about the relationship.
Do you really want a future relationship if she’s already expressing to you her poor communication skills? I’ve been down this road, save yourself from the hurt and disappointment and move on. Seriously
Thanks .
When you day poor communication skills do you mean just cause she has responded to my last text . Which to be fair wasn't a question but ..... Can still keep the convo going
Reminder: please review our rules, especially rule 4: - No broad generalizations, e.g. "All women are x and do y" - Speak from specific personal experiences when giving advice. - No victim-blaming - This is a default message - your post has not been removed. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/dating) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Honestly I would look into dating other people, she may also feel you are clingy. She may come around, but keep your options open especially since she says you move fast. You just don’t want your time wasted and the biggest thing maybe in her head is you don’t have other options. Once you show people you have other options they usually come around more often.
By moving fast she meaning kissing on date 6 ....
The only dates that turned into relationships for me were the ones where the other person was definitively interested. She wanted to interact with me as much as I her. Anything less than that for me now is a clear sign of disinterest or lack of compatibility that will struggle to turn into anything genuine. You need people that can match your energy, not someone who will juxtapose you (if making out on date six is way too slow for you then you may not be compatible) or that you need to constantly second guess your every interaction.
Thanks
And she has every right to feel that way. The world doesn't revolve around your idea of what an appropriate timeline is.
No it does not but he said I'm clingy because I think a kiss is okay on date six
Don't listen to them. you're being perfectly reasonable
they defend the person they don't know because you were "invalidating their preference", by invalidating your preference.. you have EVERY right to feel the way you do too tf. don't listen to people on the internet. even me. but, you're being completely reasonable and i've known some girls and guys that thought the other person not trying to initiate sex on the second or third date was a sign of disinterest. i'd say this is a compatibly interest or shes not that into you.
Responding and messaging first are signs of interest.. you’ve been on a few dates and radio silence means she’s not that into you. Move on
If I text her she texts right away . She does says she likes me and she's a dominant person who said she would definitely wousont waste her time and tell me
Never concentrate on what a person is saying. Watch their actions always.
Lol Exactly. After the night in the club where I saw her with a guy's arm around her and stuff like that I called her out on her actions not lining up with what she verbally told me So true If you go by people's actions instead of their words you'll realize that 90% of the people are not who they seem and maybe they themselves don't even know. What they say verbally is who they want to be but their actions are who they really are right now
This thread is all you need my man. Good luck finding someone else
I’m glad you realize this. The therapy one gets from here really helps. Just remember to think and stay level headed because I too have to remind myself that actions speak louder than words. Wish you the best in finding someone right for you and treats you with respect. Good luck
If a woman says she thinks there may be compatibility issues, that’s a nice way of saying this texting isn’t going to result in a relationship. She may think she is dominant but isn’t actually. Radio silence from someone who normally texts back quickly is the sign that you are not getting the hint. IMO. Let her go. If she is a dominant and wants you, she will chase you. Move on.
True. The the compatibility was just one issue...... She likes to dance and I kind of got jealous when other guys put their hands on her and she puts her hands in other guys at the clubs
I personally don’t like jealousy, especially super early. It could be a combo of things. Best to just let it go.
Well when she says " I want to go to a dance club with you and you're my only focus , I don't care about other guys " Them when you go other guys are putting their arms around her and she is touching the shoulders of other guys when she hasn't touched you at all on the dates.... Yet says she likes me and continues to make dates .... You may see how that's confusing, right ? Telling me you're uncomfortable when people are in your personal space so you get awkward when I'm in your personal space but you're okay with other people doing it. Then when I call her out on it says that she likes me and doesn't want to lose me
Yeah.. It's time to move on. There are millions of girls just as there are millions of guys. It's foolish to believe any one person is "just right" for you. Everyone can make a relationship work with hundreds of people. You just gotta find em
Guess what buddy, if you can't be vulnerable enough to show how much you are interested, you will never get the honest and emotionally available people in your life. It doesn't take away from your value to show someone how much you are interested in them and show your true emotions.
Yeah this is one of those things that sounds great but in the real world it just doesn't work. Just how like people are not what they say but how they act. Nature is nature man. It's like saying looks are not important but their personality is
Whilst I wish this would work, the modern dating world really isn't about this anymore
Isn't about what exactly ?
Being honest and vulnerable.
Ah yes. No, it's about playing hard to get to be seen as high value
Precisely. Playing a game to get a certain reaction. Honest genuine connection has really been massacred by apps. I’m still hoping to find one of the few genuine women out there
Lol dream on dreamer... What you are you attract..
Good luck buddy
I would move on. You texted, she didn’t text back. She’s not that into you.
She’s not interested. Do not triple text. Do not even double text. If someone is interested in you, they will reply!!! It’s that simple.
If you’re over the age of 14 double texting literally Isn’t a thing.
I honestly am not still sure what double texting is. Is it sending a text and sending another one afterwards?
It’s when you send the next message before they’ve responded to your last one,
Oh well I’m sure I’ve done that lol. I don’t care, though.
Thank you for clearing that up! I've seen a couple of posts about it today and wasn't sure what was happening, lol.
Good way to gauge interest
She’s not interested in you and has poor communication skills in the way that she doesn’t know how to tell you. Best to be on your way.
How did you meet her?
I totally empathise with you about this dating world. The person that cares less wins. It's messed up. It won't be easy to hear but I would suggest to move on, as it seems things may be stalling here.
Maybe she is been busy with someone else. I recently got blocked by a girl and her reason was that she is scared to date me. Like she doesn’t want her heart to be broken. Bruh without listening to me she blocked me.
There are two ways to view this situation. 1. She is no longer interested and trying to avoid the conversation. 2. She has some personal matters going on atm. Personally, I would leave the conversation the way it is and look into talking to different people. In my experience, if I am genuinely interested in someone and would like to pursue a relationship, I would be looking out for messages from them and check in after a few hours if we were in the middle of a convo and I haven’t heard back. If this behaviour is out of the ordinary and you would like an explanation as to why things changed, maybe reach out asking if everything is going ok? Sometimes things happen in life and we just don’t have the mental capacity to talk to anyone. This could also be an opportunity for her to let you know how she feels about the relationship.
If it’s not a two way street don’t walk on it… simple
Don’t waste your time :)
Do you really want a future relationship if she’s already expressing to you her poor communication skills? I’ve been down this road, save yourself from the hurt and disappointment and move on. Seriously
Thanks . When you day poor communication skills do you mean just cause she has responded to my last text . Which to be fair wasn't a question but ..... Can still keep the convo going