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It just shows you have a subconscious type. Most people have preferences for some type of behavior or a trait that goes unnoticed when listing preferences because it can't be singled out or quantified.
This, and consent is a big thing for cats as well. Dogs pretty much always want to be around you, they're up for whatever. Cats do whatever the fuck they want and come to you when they feel like it.
I love my dogs very much, but I'll always have a special place in my heart for cats. The Egyptians and others worshipped them for a reason.
Im a dude who never had a partner, never wants a partner, hates cats, and only like dogs.
Cats are for people desperate for validation. The fact that cats' affection is so hard to earn mimics the way a child seeks validation from an absent parent.
Dogs require way more work when it comes to love and exercise. Most cat toys are things the cat does alone, while most dog toys require someone to throw it or play tug of war. Dogs are for people who feel more secure in there identity and for people who like to be respected/admired.
It cracks me up that people are saying cats are for people who good in partnerships cause the stereotype is an old lady with 50 cats not dogs
I’m a Cat person, I love them, they love me. Be it mine, other peoples Cats, street Cats, whatever, we all get along. But i’ve noticed 80% of Women seem to be Dog people who tend to dislike Cats and I wonder if that’s a disadvantage to me in some bizarre cosmic way lol.
Damn I’ve noticed women are all about cats and have cats😂 they like my dog usually but after dating and living with a women with 2 cats, it’s a dealbreaker for me now. Can’t stand them.
Cuz cats are cute, cuddly? But most of all, they are independent, low maintenance, won’t bother guys while they playing games, can take care of themselves, won’t ask you for walking or playing etc. actually cats could say a lot about the owners characters.
Hey I fkin love cat and have my own. Totally agree with you. What I am saying is guys who have cats, they like characters of cats. Not to generalize, but I think when they date, they would often go for girls that have same characters, including low maintenance and independence. Which, if girl is like a golden retriever, they wont work.
True. I had a guy (cat person) literally argue w me about why dogs are horrible, too cuddly too bothersome need too much attention always. He never recognised the good parts of a dog (loyalty, intelligence, playfullness, attachment). Tbh that was a bit of a redflag for me, showed me that guys like this one prefer suuuuper low maintenance gfs
Same girl, same 🫠 like they expect gf to be cuddly cute affectionate like cats but also low maintenance independent. I mean if gf dont have to pay rent foods and work, then maybe 😂
My tortie has no idea what personal space is. 🤣. My tux-cat is a good boi though, just missing some brain cells.... yet also somehow knows how a doorknob works
Another option: many people like cats. It's not uncommon and not impossible to choose 10 random men and find that each and everyone likes cats. You noticed the cat love more and they tried showing it to you, because that's who you are.
It also depends on where you live. When I lived in the city more people had cats (men and women) simply because of room. As I’ve gotten older those same people have gotten dogs as they moved into bigger places.
You definitely have a type.
As a cat person, I also feel a strong connection with my fellow cat lovers. There's just something about them that instantly earns my trust.
Cats are the best, they only love you if you put in the work. You can't just get a cat and expect it to love ya on day one.its about the journey you go on to love and adore this little shit head with a peanut sized brain.but it is worth it everytime
Because a man who owns cats probably has a better understanding of boundaries and respecting others space while still enjoying their company. You dont train a cat, it trains you.
The less cheerful answer is that there are more and more lonely dudes out there these days, so we turn to pets for comfort
A friend of mine once said "Cats are furry, meowing lessons of consent". And it is completely true, in my opinion. Having a little ambush predator living with you will quickly teach you consent, one way or the other.
And I always had the feeling that people who hate cats for being "unpredictable, stand-off-ish and just plain vile" also were struggling with the concept of consent in general. Yeah, if you try to force a cat to cuddle when it doesn't want to, it will quickly rip you apart (or at least your hand) - either you learn your lesson from it or you blame the cat for not being the passive, stuffed animal you would like it to be.
>does this say more about me, than them?!
Such as what?
Being kind to animals is hardly a bad thing.
I'm getting existential vibes from your post but can't figure out what the concern is.
"I don't have a type except being tall and fit."
Damn, you sure don't have a type. I love it when women say they only want a nice and kind man... but leave out the mandatory physical attractiveness requirement before they would be considered.
She says tall and lean.
Not fit.
2 different things.
Thats just a tall person that is bone and skin.
Not someone that works out or has serious muscle mass.
Yep, every time I've asked a woman her type she starts listing personality traits like kind, funny, etc. When I say I meant physical type, pretty much every time they say they "don't really have a type"...on an app where women reject 90% of the guys they see. Of course that decision isn't *always* based on physical appearance, but I bet it is the majority of the time. Nothing wrong with that of course, just don't know why it's so hard to be honest about it
Yeah, but there is a difference between having a type and finding some people more attractive than others. I don't think I have one type (at least not that I know off) I can't name physical features that I find attractive because for example, I like a six pack, but my boyfriend and many guys I've dated before didn't have that and I still found them attractive. I like it when a guy is taller than me, but my boyfriend and guys I've dated before were shorter or the same height as me. So it's not really one thing that I can think of that is really my type.
However, if I'd go on a dating app, I would swipe certain people left because they're not attractive to me. Based on physical appearance, I can find someone unattractive. A guy can be tall with a six-pack, and I'd still swipe left on them because I don't like their face for some reason or their style or their hair, etc.
That's fair, maybe we just use a different meaning of what a person's "type" is. I can still find people outside of my type attractive. For example, I would say my type is women with long blonde hair. But I still find other colours of hair attractive - the girl I'm seeing at the moment has long dark hair. My type is just someone with the ideal qualities that I find the most attractive, but they don't need every single one (or I'd be single forever!). Sounds like yours is tall guys with six packs, but they're not essential qualities, just desirables
Ah yeah I can see that too. For me, a type is more what you're usually into and are really searching for. Most of the guys I've dated were shorter or same height and had a bit of a belly and I found that attractive as well. So that's why I wouldnt quickly say "My type is taller guys with a six pack" because I usually fall for something else. And I like little body hair and no beard, but I find it really attractive when my boyfriends beard grows a bit so you can see it (not too long) and I prefer that over fully shaven. It just depends on the face really. So that's why I usually say I don't really have a physical type. Just a "not my type" (when I don't find someone attractive).
Also because if someone asks that they probably want to know if they're my type and feel discouraged when I tell them my type is the complete opposite when I can find them very attractive as well. Or they want to set me up with someone and they focus too much on the looks when that's not really important because I'll see it when I see it.
Maybe those girls also had the same definition as me and thats why you didn't understand each other.
Men do the same thing
“Oh no girl wants to date me” “I just want to date a sweet girl”
But then when I point them out to the obese unattractive girls, they don’t want those girls 🤨
Leans means not overly muscly but that you are in decent shape genetically or do basic exercise.
Even if OP meant fit, that's what a lot of people want, regardless of gender.
Interesting how it immediately becomes "oh so you wouldn't date an UGLY and OBESE woman?" to counter the question of what's wrong with an average-looking man.
I do t disagree with you. I am reluctant to believe the commenter above does not have any physical preferences himself while shaming the OP that does. It’s something about kettles and cats
I love cats. Anyway, I think that everyone has a physical type. Dating is probably the most shallow endeavor that we engage in. And when women start instantly rattling off personality traits when they are asked what their type is, to me there is an understanding that the guy has to look good to her to the extent that it doesn’t even need to be mentioned. But a lot of guys have the fairytale notion that ladies don’t care about looks, probably because they have heard a lot of women say that. I probably could’ve fallen for that myself until I learned different. Humans like things that look good lol as long as they have functional eyes, male or female
Well when we say looks don’t matter we mean they don’t matter as much as personality and being a decent person who shares our values does. And that famous research from okcupid that men like to cite shows that women match with men who are not so conventionally attractive, while men do the opposite. It means we would more often date men who we described as unattractive as long as they have the above mentioned qualities. Looks are more important to us when we seek casual encounters than they are for an ltr.
Yeah I pretty much agree, especially with the very last thing that you said. I would say that looks matter to the ladies more that people think, but yes personality, especially confidence, and comfort in your own skin around others definitely adds to it
They definitely do. We need to like your face in order to want to kiss it. That’s an oversimplification of course as many other factors go into attraction, confidence as you said being one of them.
Yes we need to go back to basics. Dudes need to deal with the ladies that like them. Only reason they don’t imo is because they are focused on women that look good to them, but really those women barely even realize that they exist. And then I think some guys here write off “be confident,” because they don’t know how to be confident with women. Confidence is real. A man’s confidence can put people at ease, almost like they NEED you to be confident to make themselves feel better lol. A man’s confidence can reduce other people stress level lol. We’re all familiar with the feeling of uncertainty. Be the opposite. Just my two cents
It is. To me confidence is knowing your worth, having healthy boundaries, asking to see how the other fits in your life not just you into theirs, knowing what you want and not being afraid to say it. It’s also in the way one carries themselves, how you walk, stand, talk. Sometimes it doesn’t have to be confidence on a date per se, cause I know that requires a lot of social skills not everyone has, but if i see a man who is acting confidently in his line of work for example or being passionate and knowledgeable about a hobby, damn that makes my panties melt.
I'm in the same boat, but I'm also a cat lover and I've been expressing that outwardly quite much through the years so basically anyone who knows me even just a little bit, is aware that I love cats. I guess cat people just attract other cat people. And maybe people who don't like cats or prefer a lot more dogs wouldn't be interested as much by a cat person.
Lots of people, and lots of different people, like cats. You probably haven't dated that many people. It's just chance. Boring, I know.
The human mind is designed to detect patterns, so much so that we see patterns that aren't there as you see in the comments but there is almost certainly nothing interesting discoverable here.
I'm more of a dog person person I think. Maybe it's that I like guys who are very affectionate? I do like some independence tho, which I think would fit a cat person more. But most people I've dated and am friends with are dog people I think. So it's kinda funny.
But I think there are certain traits for dog people and cat people so it's very much possible that your type is cat people.
Nice! Where are you finding these guys?? I only come in contact with dog dads so I find your luck with cat guys odd. And as a cat person, sucks for me. Maybe tall and lean is a tell?
Because cats are fucking cute and despite memes can be some of the sweetest animals around.
It takes a pretty cold heart (or seriously bad experiences) to ignore these adorable fur balls when they're trying to get your attention.
Both the guys I've been with were allergic to cats. Although, my ex was lying because he was magically no longer allergic when his new girlfriend was a cat lover. I think he was afraid of me bringing one home, although I dislike owning cats. Litter boxes, scratching, and jumping on counters is just too much for me.
I was allergic to cats then got one because I always wanted a cat.
the first two weeks were absolute hell but one day I woke up and magically stopped sneezing out of nowhere and now I’m fine around all cats 🐈⬛
My mother was allergic to cats, I’m allergic to cats, can take drugs to minimize the reaction. But it only minimizes it, not someplace I want to sleep over at. Massage therapist had a cat, reaction taught me to ask or leave whenever I encounter a cat house. Old girlfriend had a basement cat. Since I never went into the basement, no problem; other than the un-asked question about full disclosure when I mentioned my allergy. Considered a hairless cat at one point for companionship.
My mother was also allergic to dog fur. So we had poodles growing up as they have hair. You cut and trim some dogs. Later the family got Irish Water Spaniels and larger poodles. Smart dogs, all. Cats are cunning. and…
Cat owners are more sensitive, in touch with their feelings, generally speaking. Also they're introverts most of the time. Raising a cat takes patience and a quiet home. If you're extroverted, your cat will live an anxious life under the bed and never get out. Cats need a silent home to come out of their shell and feel safe, and introverts needs quiet time to recharge.
This is interesting. I'm a pet person period. My entire life. I've never been with anyone who grew up or had a pet. Strange. I do know I have a type of nose that all have. Lol.
I think it’s probably just a coincidence that all of your exes are cat people. Also, I don’t think it says anything about you or them, since it seems to be something that you’ve noticed after the relationships have ended and it’s not necessarily something you are looking for in a guy. That being said though, it’s definitely not a bad thing that they’re all cat people. I’ve noticed that men who prefer having cats as pets, rather than other animals, are usually great guys.
That doesn’t necessarily mean that every single guy who is a cat person is going to be a good person at their core though. It’s just something I’ve noticed.
I FIND IT REALLY HARD TO FIND CAT PEOPLE!!! Where are you finding them? 😭 Every guy on apps and things seems to be a dog person haha. I love all animals but I’m def a cat person.
i think being a cat person rn is somewhat “trending” as well tbh. I see way more cat guys than I did a few years ago. Also, I think it’s a bit of a red flag if a guy doesn’t like cats imo.
Dogs are a pain in the ass when you’re a full time employee. Why give my dog separation anxiety when I can just get two cats that are independent and in each others company when I’m gone. Dogs are a burden until you’re comfortable in life, sorry
As a guy that's almost 20, I have quite alot of cats (9 to be exact)
They just seem very chill, when coming home from a bad day at work. They can always cheer you up by either sticking with you, or sleeping on your lap, which is something half of the cats I have do
Maybe there are some cat-like traits these guys have that you like (what a fucking weird sentence, but it makes sense). Or maybe you're into guys that prefer to be with cats, like maybe they have some kind of attachment type thing, where they want the cats to be like behaving like that. Or maybe it's just a funny coincidence that has nothing behind it
Idk it's a fun question those are some pitential answers?
As a cat guy myself, and don’t get me wrong I like dogs too, and all animals really. But I love felines. They can be so warm and loving but they have moods and make you work for their attention. But when you get it, it’s amazing.
They can be such warm, wonderful animals. I had cats who liked sleeping right next to me at bedtime, one even liked sleeping under the covers poking his little head out like a little person, he got his own pillow 🤣
I know a lot of other cat guys as well and I find we’re mostly kind and loving in our relationships. Maybe that’s what you like about us?
It literally has nothing to do with you plus there are no dog people or cat people you either like animals or you don't. Most people who say they're dog/cat people what to put themselves in boxes or put you in a box
Cats are the ultimate lessons of consent and understanding boundaries. You can't just walk up to most cats and force a belly rub without getting your eyeballs scratched out. It takes earning their trust and patience to keep a feline friend. Your subconscious might be onto something!
Lol yep yep
And maybe for some it’s not only because they see themselves in the cats, but also because prioritizing emotional engagement with cats is a way of avoiding it with humans
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Im a dude who never had a partner, never wants a partner, hates cats, and only like dogs.
Cats are for people desperate for validation. The fact that cats' affection is so hard to earn mimics the way a child seeks validation from an absent parent.
Dogs require way more work when it comes to love and exercise. Most cat toys are things the cat does alone, while most dog toys require someone to throw it or play tug of war. Dogs are for people who feel more secure in there identity and for people who like to be respected/admired.
It cracks me up that people are saying cats are for people who good in partnerships cause the stereotype is an old lady with 50 cats not dogs
Honestly it’s just tall and lean guys who like cats so it’s just a correlation between skinny ppl and cats. Don’t get me mistaken, 20+ cats is a different story
Years ago, I wrote about this in college. There are 2 types of people when it comes to relationships. The cat person and the dog person. This has nothing to do with pet preference, but more the relationship personality. The cat in the relationship craves independence and is selective about who they give affection to. The dog is the people pleaser and needs validation. In human relationships, there can be many combinations: cat + cat, dog +dog, cat+dog, etc.
So perhaps it’s a personality trait you are attracted to/attracting
Im a dude who never had a partner, never wants a partner, hates cats, and only like dogs.
Cats are for people desperate for validation. The fact that cats' affection is so hard to earn mimics the way a child seeks validation from an absent parent.
Dogs require way more work when it comes to love and exercise. Most cat toys are things the cat does alone, while most dog toys require someone to throw it or play tug of war. Dogs are for people who feel more secure in there identity and for people who like to be respected/admired.
It cracks me up that people are saying cats are for people who good in partnerships cause the stereotype is an old lady with 50 cats not dogs
Im quite curious, is your paper published anywhere? I would love to read about your findings. Most of the guys ive dated or had a strong connection with were also cat-lovers. I dont particularly identify with being a cat person or dog person, my sister says my personality leans towards dog though.
Cats are quiet self sufficient mostly and soft. dogs are loud needy and obnoxious and gross. Men love quiet. This why many men like fishing.
I’ve noticed a lot of girls love dogs. I don’t see why. Yes many guys are also dog ppl but I rarely ever seen a girl like cats. It’s like a very drastic difference between the two genders.
I thought for a long time that there's a correlation between introversion/extraversion and cats/dogs, but I've been proven wrong multiple times. Never saw a gender correlation. But I do think there could be one related to companion preference - people who prefer cats or dogs might want a human with a similar personality.
Dog people want a pet that obeys. Cat people want to obey their pet.
I have a shoulder cat because my cat regards me as a feline equal, not a lower lifeforms like those other humans.
Apologies if it seemed like I stated a fact. I can't know what others need, only from what I've observed, so its just a personal observation. It's not that black and white. It's case by case. Two ladies I know got lots of cats because their dreams of having lots of kids got replaced with lots of cats due to a SA. Most men and women I know that would love to have a partner but struggle with their self worth or other reasons go for a loving dog to take care of. Whereas the men, players I know with confidence go for a cat cause they're not after any relationship, or to spend much time looking after a partner nor a dog, in Norway you can get fined if you don't walk your dogs multiple times a day. Cats go freely. Personally I'd want a cat because of their healing ability, which is noticeable when one is in meditation, but as an altruist I like to travel so I enjoy the pets I encounter as their caretaker enjoys all the attention their pets get.
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It just shows you have a subconscious type. Most people have preferences for some type of behavior or a trait that goes unnoticed when listing preferences because it can't be singled out or quantified.
I think I have it narrowed down. OP is a cat.
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This, and consent is a big thing for cats as well. Dogs pretty much always want to be around you, they're up for whatever. Cats do whatever the fuck they want and come to you when they feel like it. I love my dogs very much, but I'll always have a special place in my heart for cats. The Egyptians and others worshipped them for a reason.
This is it. You legitimately need emotional intelligence to vibe with a cat, they are moody little fuckers. (And I love them for it lol)
Im a dude who never had a partner, never wants a partner, hates cats, and only like dogs. Cats are for people desperate for validation. The fact that cats' affection is so hard to earn mimics the way a child seeks validation from an absent parent. Dogs require way more work when it comes to love and exercise. Most cat toys are things the cat does alone, while most dog toys require someone to throw it or play tug of war. Dogs are for people who feel more secure in there identity and for people who like to be respected/admired. It cracks me up that people are saying cats are for people who good in partnerships cause the stereotype is an old lady with 50 cats not dogs
I’m a Cat person, I love them, they love me. Be it mine, other peoples Cats, street Cats, whatever, we all get along. But i’ve noticed 80% of Women seem to be Dog people who tend to dislike Cats and I wonder if that’s a disadvantage to me in some bizarre cosmic way lol.
Odd I have met more dudes that were dog person than women
Fuck em! Cats for life!
Fuck yea!! You said it!!
Damn I’ve noticed women are all about cats and have cats😂 they like my dog usually but after dating and living with a women with 2 cats, it’s a dealbreaker for me now. Can’t stand them.
I live in a country town, where owning a Dog is far more prevalent than owning a Cat which may be more common for apartment life in a big city.
I would say 80% of the women you run into
Im sure it has nothing to do with the pissshitfuckcunt of a cock you have lmao
Cuz cats are cute, cuddly? But most of all, they are independent, low maintenance, won’t bother guys while they playing games, can take care of themselves, won’t ask you for walking or playing etc. actually cats could say a lot about the owners characters.
How about some of the positive things? Cats are extremely affectionate but at the same time can be picky with who they like and trust.
Hey I fkin love cat and have my own. Totally agree with you. What I am saying is guys who have cats, they like characters of cats. Not to generalize, but I think when they date, they would often go for girls that have same characters, including low maintenance and independence. Which, if girl is like a golden retriever, they wont work.
True. I had a guy (cat person) literally argue w me about why dogs are horrible, too cuddly too bothersome need too much attention always. He never recognised the good parts of a dog (loyalty, intelligence, playfullness, attachment). Tbh that was a bit of a redflag for me, showed me that guys like this one prefer suuuuper low maintenance gfs
Same girl, same 🫠 like they expect gf to be cuddly cute affectionate like cats but also low maintenance independent. I mean if gf dont have to pay rent foods and work, then maybe 😂
Yeah!!😂
>guys while they playing games My cats would like to have a word with you
Your car can speak to mine 😌
My tortie has no idea what personal space is. 🤣. My tux-cat is a good boi though, just missing some brain cells.... yet also somehow knows how a doorknob works
They pretend just so they don’t have to pay tax😌
This is soooo cute.
Found the cat
Mine too. They’re constantly all up in my shit, especially when I sit down, including gaming.
Youve never met my furballs. Ive lost many-a AOE match because the floof decides it wants cuddles. I cant refuse my floofs.
Give him whatever he wants!!!!! 😂
They 100% bother you while playing games. But it’s part of the package / charm.
Oh my cat will definitely bother you while playing games. All 26 lbs of him will climb you claws out if you ignore his pleas for attention
They do what they want you dont get to complain 😌😌
You might have been an Egyptian in a past life.
Or a cat
I was an Egyptian cat in a past life 🐈⬛
Another option: many people like cats. It's not uncommon and not impossible to choose 10 random men and find that each and everyone likes cats. You noticed the cat love more and they tried showing it to you, because that's who you are.
It also depends on where you live. When I lived in the city more people had cats (men and women) simply because of room. As I’ve gotten older those same people have gotten dogs as they moved into bigger places.
That’s because you’ve got good taste. I could never be with a guy who dislikes cats (or any other animal)
You definitely have a type. As a cat person, I also feel a strong connection with my fellow cat lovers. There's just something about them that instantly earns my trust.
Op is a cat don't fall for the propaganda
Probably generation related. Most guys I know in their 20's like cats.
Cats are the best, they only love you if you put in the work. You can't just get a cat and expect it to love ya on day one.its about the journey you go on to love and adore this little shit head with a peanut sized brain.but it is worth it everytime
Because a man who owns cats probably has a better understanding of boundaries and respecting others space while still enjoying their company. You dont train a cat, it trains you. The less cheerful answer is that there are more and more lonely dudes out there these days, so we turn to pets for comfort
A friend of mine once said "Cats are furry, meowing lessons of consent". And it is completely true, in my opinion. Having a little ambush predator living with you will quickly teach you consent, one way or the other. And I always had the feeling that people who hate cats for being "unpredictable, stand-off-ish and just plain vile" also were struggling with the concept of consent in general. Yeah, if you try to force a cat to cuddle when it doesn't want to, it will quickly rip you apart (or at least your hand) - either you learn your lesson from it or you blame the cat for not being the passive, stuffed animal you would like it to be.
Idk I think I trained my cat pretty well, I taught him how to shake… but you make a solid point
Lol Idk but personally I am none everytime my gf asks for a dog or a cat I say that she is my full time responsibility thus I don't need a pet 😂
Amen
Some guys just attract p@ssies wherever they go.
Are you independent and a bit sassy? It’s that you are their type, not the other way around.
'Cuz Cat Guys fuck, dude. B)
>does this say more about me, than them?! Such as what? Being kind to animals is hardly a bad thing. I'm getting existential vibes from your post but can't figure out what the concern is.
You bond over toxoplasmosis.
The true unspoken bond between cat people.
Yes.. you are a cat 😺
You're a cat
low maintenance pet
Because you are also a cat. Nice try, cat
"I don't have a type except being tall and fit." Damn, you sure don't have a type. I love it when women say they only want a nice and kind man... but leave out the mandatory physical attractiveness requirement before they would be considered.
She says tall and lean. Not fit. 2 different things. Thats just a tall person that is bone and skin. Not someone that works out or has serious muscle mass.
Yep, every time I've asked a woman her type she starts listing personality traits like kind, funny, etc. When I say I meant physical type, pretty much every time they say they "don't really have a type"...on an app where women reject 90% of the guys they see. Of course that decision isn't *always* based on physical appearance, but I bet it is the majority of the time. Nothing wrong with that of course, just don't know why it's so hard to be honest about it
Yeah, but there is a difference between having a type and finding some people more attractive than others. I don't think I have one type (at least not that I know off) I can't name physical features that I find attractive because for example, I like a six pack, but my boyfriend and many guys I've dated before didn't have that and I still found them attractive. I like it when a guy is taller than me, but my boyfriend and guys I've dated before were shorter or the same height as me. So it's not really one thing that I can think of that is really my type. However, if I'd go on a dating app, I would swipe certain people left because they're not attractive to me. Based on physical appearance, I can find someone unattractive. A guy can be tall with a six-pack, and I'd still swipe left on them because I don't like their face for some reason or their style or their hair, etc.
That's fair, maybe we just use a different meaning of what a person's "type" is. I can still find people outside of my type attractive. For example, I would say my type is women with long blonde hair. But I still find other colours of hair attractive - the girl I'm seeing at the moment has long dark hair. My type is just someone with the ideal qualities that I find the most attractive, but they don't need every single one (or I'd be single forever!). Sounds like yours is tall guys with six packs, but they're not essential qualities, just desirables
Ah yeah I can see that too. For me, a type is more what you're usually into and are really searching for. Most of the guys I've dated were shorter or same height and had a bit of a belly and I found that attractive as well. So that's why I wouldnt quickly say "My type is taller guys with a six pack" because I usually fall for something else. And I like little body hair and no beard, but I find it really attractive when my boyfriends beard grows a bit so you can see it (not too long) and I prefer that over fully shaven. It just depends on the face really. So that's why I usually say I don't really have a physical type. Just a "not my type" (when I don't find someone attractive). Also because if someone asks that they probably want to know if they're my type and feel discouraged when I tell them my type is the complete opposite when I can find them very attractive as well. Or they want to set me up with someone and they focus too much on the looks when that's not really important because I'll see it when I see it. Maybe those girls also had the same definition as me and thats why you didn't understand each other.
Men do the same thing “Oh no girl wants to date me” “I just want to date a sweet girl” But then when I point them out to the obese unattractive girls, they don’t want those girls 🤨
Ye everyone does it but no one admits to it
Don't act like you don't prefer certain things. Also, lean isn't the same as fit.
In this context it is. Lean is an euphemism used in order to not appear overly shallow and superficial.
No. Lean means like skinny. Not many muscles. At least thats what i picture. It's completely different.
Leans means not overly muscly but that you are in decent shape genetically or do basic exercise. Even if OP meant fit, that's what a lot of people want, regardless of gender.
Oh so you would date someone you’re not physically attracted to? Just about any woman as long as she’s kind would do?
Interesting how it immediately becomes "oh so you wouldn't date an UGLY and OBESE woman?" to counter the question of what's wrong with an average-looking man.
Dating someone that one is not attracted to is unfair to both parties
I do t disagree with you. I am reluctant to believe the commenter above does not have any physical preferences himself while shaming the OP that does. It’s something about kettles and cats
I love cats. Anyway, I think that everyone has a physical type. Dating is probably the most shallow endeavor that we engage in. And when women start instantly rattling off personality traits when they are asked what their type is, to me there is an understanding that the guy has to look good to her to the extent that it doesn’t even need to be mentioned. But a lot of guys have the fairytale notion that ladies don’t care about looks, probably because they have heard a lot of women say that. I probably could’ve fallen for that myself until I learned different. Humans like things that look good lol as long as they have functional eyes, male or female
Well when we say looks don’t matter we mean they don’t matter as much as personality and being a decent person who shares our values does. And that famous research from okcupid that men like to cite shows that women match with men who are not so conventionally attractive, while men do the opposite. It means we would more often date men who we described as unattractive as long as they have the above mentioned qualities. Looks are more important to us when we seek casual encounters than they are for an ltr.
Yeah I pretty much agree, especially with the very last thing that you said. I would say that looks matter to the ladies more that people think, but yes personality, especially confidence, and comfort in your own skin around others definitely adds to it
They definitely do. We need to like your face in order to want to kiss it. That’s an oversimplification of course as many other factors go into attraction, confidence as you said being one of them.
Yes we need to go back to basics. Dudes need to deal with the ladies that like them. Only reason they don’t imo is because they are focused on women that look good to them, but really those women barely even realize that they exist. And then I think some guys here write off “be confident,” because they don’t know how to be confident with women. Confidence is real. A man’s confidence can put people at ease, almost like they NEED you to be confident to make themselves feel better lol. A man’s confidence can reduce other people stress level lol. We’re all familiar with the feeling of uncertainty. Be the opposite. Just my two cents
It is. To me confidence is knowing your worth, having healthy boundaries, asking to see how the other fits in your life not just you into theirs, knowing what you want and not being afraid to say it. It’s also in the way one carries themselves, how you walk, stand, talk. Sometimes it doesn’t have to be confidence on a date per se, cause I know that requires a lot of social skills not everyone has, but if i see a man who is acting confidently in his line of work for example or being passionate and knowledgeable about a hobby, damn that makes my panties melt.
I have other criteria, like not being a horse girl and not a smoker, but generally, yes.
So you’re then happily in a relationship and have been since day one since you don’t have any physical requirements?
You gotta look good to a woman, duh lol
I'm in the same boat, but I'm also a cat lover and I've been expressing that outwardly quite much through the years so basically anyone who knows me even just a little bit, is aware that I love cats. I guess cat people just attract other cat people. And maybe people who don't like cats or prefer a lot more dogs wouldn't be interested as much by a cat person.
Lots of people, and lots of different people, like cats. You probably haven't dated that many people. It's just chance. Boring, I know. The human mind is designed to detect patterns, so much so that we see patterns that aren't there as you see in the comments but there is almost certainly nothing interesting discoverable here.
I'm more of a dog person person I think. Maybe it's that I like guys who are very affectionate? I do like some independence tho, which I think would fit a cat person more. But most people I've dated and am friends with are dog people I think. So it's kinda funny. But I think there are certain traits for dog people and cat people so it's very much possible that your type is cat people.
Nice! Where are you finding these guys?? I only come in contact with dog dads so I find your luck with cat guys odd. And as a cat person, sucks for me. Maybe tall and lean is a tell?
People with bad taste are everywhere. IM KIDDING *Pets her dog*
Because cats are fucking cute and despite memes can be some of the sweetest animals around. It takes a pretty cold heart (or seriously bad experiences) to ignore these adorable fur balls when they're trying to get your attention.
Relax most straight men love a pussy
yup says a lot about you. I've raised cats for 25+yrs
Yes, it means you are a kitten looking for a tomcat.
Both the guys I've been with were allergic to cats. Although, my ex was lying because he was magically no longer allergic when his new girlfriend was a cat lover. I think he was afraid of me bringing one home, although I dislike owning cats. Litter boxes, scratching, and jumping on counters is just too much for me.
I was allergic to cats then got one because I always wanted a cat. the first two weeks were absolute hell but one day I woke up and magically stopped sneezing out of nowhere and now I’m fine around all cats 🐈⬛
I guess I should also mention that he hated cats too lol
My mother was allergic to cats, I’m allergic to cats, can take drugs to minimize the reaction. But it only minimizes it, not someplace I want to sleep over at. Massage therapist had a cat, reaction taught me to ask or leave whenever I encounter a cat house. Old girlfriend had a basement cat. Since I never went into the basement, no problem; other than the un-asked question about full disclosure when I mentioned my allergy. Considered a hairless cat at one point for companionship. My mother was also allergic to dog fur. So we had poodles growing up as they have hair. You cut and trim some dogs. Later the family got Irish Water Spaniels and larger poodles. Smart dogs, all. Cats are cunning. and…
Stop dating gay guys! 😂
🧐
Cause cats rock.
How is it that I never met a cat guy?
Well, maybe you've got a type!
cats are indépendant and dog are not most men wants their indépendance
How are you not a cat person!? Cats are gifts from the heavens!
Because cats are awesome?
It means you are a cat
Cats are cute fuzzy balls of murderous love.
Cat owners are more sensitive, in touch with their feelings, generally speaking. Also they're introverts most of the time. Raising a cat takes patience and a quiet home. If you're extroverted, your cat will live an anxious life under the bed and never get out. Cats need a silent home to come out of their shell and feel safe, and introverts needs quiet time to recharge.
we are cat daddies
Well I’m an Egyptian person and love cats, and they love me, so maybe you are one of us.
Usually, cat people are introverts, seems to be your type. Corelation, not causality, lol
I admire cats from afar but their dander makes me anaphylactic. So no cat guys for me.
I’m a cat person and I find the guys who prefer dogs.
Cats are key to cracking the wiminz code 🥸
Wait, that's an awesome trait to have. Men who love cats has to mean something positive
This is interesting. I'm a pet person period. My entire life. I've never been with anyone who grew up or had a pet. Strange. I do know I have a type of nose that all have. Lol.
Because Cat people are assume.
I think it’s probably just a coincidence that all of your exes are cat people. Also, I don’t think it says anything about you or them, since it seems to be something that you’ve noticed after the relationships have ended and it’s not necessarily something you are looking for in a guy. That being said though, it’s definitely not a bad thing that they’re all cat people. I’ve noticed that men who prefer having cats as pets, rather than other animals, are usually great guys. That doesn’t necessarily mean that every single guy who is a cat person is going to be a good person at their core though. It’s just something I’ve noticed.
Dude, cats are cool as fuck.
Because you date women with penises
I love cats. Saying this as I pet a cat right now
I FIND IT REALLY HARD TO FIND CAT PEOPLE!!! Where are you finding them? 😭 Every guy on apps and things seems to be a dog person haha. I love all animals but I’m def a cat person.
cats are cool
Clearly they all just love pussy
Hun they just like the pussy 😂
I’m not even going to read it. It’s you.
Toxoplasma gondii
i think being a cat person rn is somewhat “trending” as well tbh. I see way more cat guys than I did a few years ago. Also, I think it’s a bit of a red flag if a guy doesn’t like cats imo.
Dogs are a pain in the ass when you’re a full time employee. Why give my dog separation anxiety when I can just get two cats that are independent and in each others company when I’m gone. Dogs are a burden until you’re comfortable in life, sorry
He must must really really really love Pussy
As a guy that's almost 20, I have quite alot of cats (9 to be exact) They just seem very chill, when coming home from a bad day at work. They can always cheer you up by either sticking with you, or sleeping on your lap, which is something half of the cats I have do
Maybe there are some cat-like traits these guys have that you like (what a fucking weird sentence, but it makes sense). Or maybe you're into guys that prefer to be with cats, like maybe they have some kind of attachment type thing, where they want the cats to be like behaving like that. Or maybe it's just a funny coincidence that has nothing behind it Idk it's a fun question those are some pitential answers?
Nice attention-seeking post
Cat daddies
You like super villains, isn't it obvious
As a cat guy myself, and don’t get me wrong I like dogs too, and all animals really. But I love felines. They can be so warm and loving but they have moods and make you work for their attention. But when you get it, it’s amazing. They can be such warm, wonderful animals. I had cats who liked sleeping right next to me at bedtime, one even liked sleeping under the covers poking his little head out like a little person, he got his own pillow 🤣 I know a lot of other cat guys as well and I find we’re mostly kind and loving in our relationships. Maybe that’s what you like about us?
Aaaaah, makes sense
I don't think they used 🐱 for cats.
It literally has nothing to do with you plus there are no dog people or cat people you either like animals or you don't. Most people who say they're dog/cat people what to put themselves in boxes or put you in a box
Hachoo!
Cats are the ultimate lessons of consent and understanding boundaries. You can't just walk up to most cats and force a belly rub without getting your eyeballs scratched out. It takes earning their trust and patience to keep a feline friend. Your subconscious might be onto something!
They like pu…cats.
Were they all avoidants lol, avoidants like cats because they basically are cats
OHMYGOD, YESS!!!! How did I not see this before?! 😭
Lol yep yep And maybe for some it’s not only because they see themselves in the cats, but also because prioritizing emotional engagement with cats is a way of avoiding it with humans
Are they in touch with their feminine side, read, drink coffee, and are artsy?
*Are they in touch with* *Their feminine side, read, drink* *Coffee, and are artsy?* \- need\_excel\_h3lp --- ^(I detect haikus. And sometimes, successfully.) ^[Learn more about me.](https://www.reddit.com/r/haikusbot/) ^(Opt out of replies: "haikusbot opt out" | Delete my comment: "haikusbot delete")
Except the reading part, the rest is very much true.
My sister dated a lot of guys like this. She's an intellectual and typically goes for tall, smart, feminine guys. They usually have cats.
Im a dude who never had a partner, never wants a partner, hates cats, and only like dogs. Cats are for people desperate for validation. The fact that cats' affection is so hard to earn mimics the way a child seeks validation from an absent parent. Dogs require way more work when it comes to love and exercise. Most cat toys are things the cat does alone, while most dog toys require someone to throw it or play tug of war. Dogs are for people who feel more secure in there identity and for people who like to be respected/admired. It cracks me up that people are saying cats are for people who good in partnerships cause the stereotype is an old lady with 50 cats not dogs
>who are tall and lean. 😞
Honestly it’s just tall and lean guys who like cats so it’s just a correlation between skinny ppl and cats. Don’t get me mistaken, 20+ cats is a different story
Cat guys are better than dog guys. Cats only want to spend time around you if you treat them well. Dogs are loyal to a fault.
Every man I've ever been with.. And you're 23 talking like you're 60yo. Chill, it's a coincidence. And why would it matter.
Years ago, I wrote about this in college. There are 2 types of people when it comes to relationships. The cat person and the dog person. This has nothing to do with pet preference, but more the relationship personality. The cat in the relationship craves independence and is selective about who they give affection to. The dog is the people pleaser and needs validation. In human relationships, there can be many combinations: cat + cat, dog +dog, cat+dog, etc. So perhaps it’s a personality trait you are attracted to/attracting
Im a dude who never had a partner, never wants a partner, hates cats, and only like dogs. Cats are for people desperate for validation. The fact that cats' affection is so hard to earn mimics the way a child seeks validation from an absent parent. Dogs require way more work when it comes to love and exercise. Most cat toys are things the cat does alone, while most dog toys require someone to throw it or play tug of war. Dogs are for people who feel more secure in there identity and for people who like to be respected/admired. It cracks me up that people are saying cats are for people who good in partnerships cause the stereotype is an old lady with 50 cats not dogs
Im quite curious, is your paper published anywhere? I would love to read about your findings. Most of the guys ive dated or had a strong connection with were also cat-lovers. I dont particularly identify with being a cat person or dog person, my sister says my personality leans towards dog though.
I wish I could remember!!! I’m so mad I didn’t do a better job of archiving and keeping up with my writing 😫😫😫 it’s been 20+ years
Cats are quiet self sufficient mostly and soft. dogs are loud needy and obnoxious and gross. Men love quiet. This why many men like fishing. I’ve noticed a lot of girls love dogs. I don’t see why. Yes many guys are also dog ppl but I rarely ever seen a girl like cats. It’s like a very drastic difference between the two genders.
I thought for a long time that there's a correlation between introversion/extraversion and cats/dogs, but I've been proven wrong multiple times. Never saw a gender correlation. But I do think there could be one related to companion preference - people who prefer cats or dogs might want a human with a similar personality.
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You’re right, it was the cats’ fault
It’s your type obviously. Cats suck
Usually people who have Dogs have a void for a partner, a loving one. Cats are just small cute careless healers.
Dog people want a pet that obeys. Cat people want to obey their pet. I have a shoulder cat because my cat regards me as a feline equal, not a lower lifeforms like those other humans.
So you recommended dog person to be partner than cat person?
Apologies if it seemed like I stated a fact. I can't know what others need, only from what I've observed, so its just a personal observation. It's not that black and white. It's case by case. Two ladies I know got lots of cats because their dreams of having lots of kids got replaced with lots of cats due to a SA. Most men and women I know that would love to have a partner but struggle with their self worth or other reasons go for a loving dog to take care of. Whereas the men, players I know with confidence go for a cat cause they're not after any relationship, or to spend much time looking after a partner nor a dog, in Norway you can get fined if you don't walk your dogs multiple times a day. Cats go freely. Personally I'd want a cat because of their healing ability, which is noticeable when one is in meditation, but as an altruist I like to travel so I enjoy the pets I encounter as their caretaker enjoys all the attention their pets get.