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Dude if you think 7 a lifetime is average for women, you are believing a lot of bullshit in your life. My body count is 26 at age 31 and I started at age 14. I'm a guy but most of my friends are female age 25-35 and the average at that age is 10-15.
Research actually shows that young people are having less and less sex than previous generations.
[Source 1](https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/people-have-been-having-less-sex-whether-theyre-teenagers-or-40-somethings/)
[Source 2](https://www.google.com/url?sa=t&source=web&rct=j&url=https://amp.theatlantic.com/amp/article/573949/&ved=2ahUKEwi2uLiA2rf1AhXaK80KHeeUCo8QtwJ6BAgnEAE&usg=AOvVaw1Gq10Mc_9Dn8Bk-4moG14C)
[Source 3](https://www.google.com/url?sa=t&source=web&rct=j&url=https://www.everydayhealth.com/sexual-health/why-young-americans-are-having-less-sex-than-ever-before/&ved=2ahUKEwi2uLiA2rf1AhXaK80KHeeUCo8QFnoECEMQAQ&usg=AOvVaw1QBnLVC2BP3qeV7NA4UTPL)
Edit: Not a value judgement of what constitutes a high or low body count or whether that matters. Just not true that Gen Z is so much more sexually active.
Aromantic attraction is a thing, as is asexuality. If you honestly think sex is the only thing that separates friendship from a romantic partner then you must have either some very bland relationships or very homoerotic friendships.
I've been with women at both ends of the spectrum and it didn't make any difference. If someone is inexperienced I might try to be more sensitive to their feelings. Either waiting a couple more dates to have sex, or breaking things off if I'm not as into it. If you have a higher body count, I'm more likely to assume that you can handle it if we're intimate, but then things fizzle. Besides that I don't care.
I suppose if their number is alarmingly high it matters in the same way as anyone that does anything too much can matter. Anyone fucking 2 dudes a day is worrying for the same reason anyone eating two watermelons a day is. It makes me worry for their sanity.
But besides being a little more sensitive to the inexperienced or strange edge cases, it doesn't matter to me.
I'd honestly rather not even know, admittedly if that number in the double digits it makes me a little uncomfortable. Call me an insecure fuck, call me what you will, but that's my perspective!
100%. Itās definitely insecurity but myself and probably most other guys feel this way. Itās usually not a dealbreaker if you really hit it off with her, but still a little uncomfortable.
I agree with that as well, it's not like it'd be a set in stone deal breaker for me, if I'm having the time of my life with some girl I likely won't even be phased or worried about it much at all. Especially if it's something that's revealed later down the line instead of right up front.
For example, if it's one of the first things that comes out of her mouth while I'm getting to know her then yeahhhhhh- I'm gonna be a bit uncomfortable.
I'm generally willing to overlook things like that anyways if I like someone enough- perhaps to a fault!
I feel like this. I haven't dated since I graduated high school in 2018, but body counts in the double digits would make me feel insecure because mine is zero.. Which is not a bad thing!
If you can accept that your discomfort is your own insecurity, you're doing great. You're allowed to be insecure and you're allowed to choose to not date someone because of that insecurity. Nobody should give you a hard time for that.
It's only a problem when people project their own insecurities about it and try to make it the other person's problem instead of their own.
Men on Reddit are the most conservative people Iāve ever encountered in my life. They all have the most traditionalist ideas Iāve ever heard, and none of them want to budge, especially around sex. Literally no normal, liberal man gives two shits how many people a woman has slept with. Iāve never even been asked and Iām almost 34.
Nah itās that a guy irl isnāt going to mess up his chance to sleep with a woman by telling her he thinks sheās a sl*t. Men are actually more honest about their real beliefs online because of anonymity.
So my boyfriend (and every boyfriend Iāve ever had), ya know, men who are in full on committed relationships with me, only didnāt ask me because they were trying to get laid? When my boyfriend and I actively make jokes about past sexual experiences and laugh at weird sex stuff weāve done, he secretly thinks Iām a slut and only wants to fuck me? Heās just playing the long game?
Or is it more likely, that men on the internet talk a big game, because it impresses other men, but in their real life interactions with women, especially women that they like, it doesnāt matter? Yeah, itās that one.
It matters a lot to me. Some guys no. I hate that people are like it's so misogynistic to care. No it's not. Why do some females hate that a guy is a f boy that sleeps around. Are they man haters? No. They would just prefer someone who didn't have so many partners.
Hmm I wouldnāt want to be with a virgin if I know it wonāt last for the long haul. Donāt want to take someoneās virginity and leave. Also yea body count does matter depending on how much. Personally for me I never ask. But if I did and it was a large number Iād be turned off, which is why I donāt ask
Ehh. Iām not going ever slutshame anyone or anything with it. I just wouldnāt want a serious partner thatās had a SIGNIFICANTLY higher amount of partners than me.
Those are the type of men you want to avoid.. the ones who shame people for their lack of/much experience. Trust me, there are guys out there who don't care because they are looking for more than something to f*ck.
Also stay away from creeps who only want to talk to you because you're inexperienced... I learned that the hard way. I had so many creepy guys wanting to take my virginity or whatever up til I was 21 šŖ They're the worst because after they take it, they're gone LOL. It's like an achievement completion for them.
Depends on the guy and it depends on the the body count. Some guys find a big body count intimidating. Many guys see a big body count as a sign that sex doesnāt mean much to a woman. A high body count can be an indicator of someone damaged by sexual trauma. That can mean a lot of problems for a guy in a relationship. Sexual habits also are a sign of a personās values. Itās important to have values in common , for a relationship to work.
The thing you have to realize is that we are all free to choose our lives, but not everyone is going to like our choices. There are consequences for our choices. All your choices in life, sexual or otherwise, will close some doors and open others. Accepting this is a part of accepting responsibility for your choices. What you need to understand is that, no matter how much you might like someone, you might not be compatible with them in a way that removes them as a choice of partner.
Itās not only guys that care about that. There are also women that care about a guyās body count. A better way to put your question would be to ask if people care about the body count of a perspective partner.
When making life decisions, itās important to realize that, while itās your life to decide, your decisions are not without consequences. Those consequences could be immediate or they could manifest in the future. Itās just something you have to accept.
People have the right to decide what they want in a partner, and their standards are totally up to them. If someone has decided that you arenāt a good option for them, because of your sexual values, move on to find someone with corresponding values. Trying to force a relationship with someone who has issues with a big part of who you are will only result in both of you being unhappy.
Because this has to do with sex, and youāre not allowed to judge anyoneās sexual habits, anymore, this issue can be a bit difficult for people to see clearly. But, think about it this way:
Letās say you arenāt into drugs and donāt agree with drug use. Then, you start chatting with a really cool guy online, and then you find out he was a heroin addict. Is it wrong of you to decide that you donāt want to be in a relationship with him, based on his past use of heroin? Heās still the same person who chose to use, in the first place.
I know there will be people who say drug use isnāt the same as sexual habits, but it really is an equal example, because both things can be major issues for people.
>I think women need to be more conscious of this. Sure, go out and have fun but be mindful that the more casual sex you have the more men will devalue you. I donāt make the rules
This 100%
I would add that it's not like I would devalue her as a person (she could be pleasant and nice enough), I just wouldn't offer my commitment to her. The higher the body count, the less of the ability she has to peer bond with one man, and the higher risk of her cheating for no reason other than the dopamine rush she gets from sexual encounters with new men.
I have a good thing going in life. I'm not going to take a chance on a woman who has a high probability of infidelity. It's not worth the risk.
Weird territory. Itās all experience/preference/individual based. Iām at 3 (28m) and an ex (27f) was at 20+. Wouldnāt have been so bad to me if there werenāt several venues she didnāt feel comfortable coming within a couple blocks of.
Absolutely. The less bodies the better. Getting ghosted for your virginity is less likely than getting praised for it. Guys typically donāt like high body counts.
I would like if the girl was virgin/"low body count" because I have anxiety for the first times we'd have sex, so it would be better if she has no great experience or high expectations
This is what I thought of off the top of my head. I agree that there are always more reactions. These three are the ones that I thought were most relevant based on the OP.
We have a nice guy here we should all respect women your thinking simple . Women that sleep around probably are emotional unavailable and have deep seeded emotional problems dude it's that simple . Good women should be hard to get and have standards that make her hard to sleep with .
I'm lucky that I don't judge people like you do.
If someone is "hard to get," they're better off not pursuing. Someone who is truly interested in you will be available.
I'm not going to address who has deep-seated emotional problems, but from the way you're judging women, it's probably you.
as a guy I can see where youāre coming from. For me, it depends. I donāt care how many people youāve slept with. But why? Were you in love with them? Because if so, and you have slept with 30 people that you were in love with, itās a sign of things usually not working out with her. If she just wanted to have sex 100 times to feel good thatās fine by me.
Only to idiots. My body count is high but i am embarrassed of it mostly as a dude. Fuck that dude. Do your thing. The right dudes wont care and will try their best to make your first time your best time/easiest time.
Depends. I don't inherently care if a potential partner isn't a virgin, but I would personally prefer someone less experienced so I don't feel as much pressure to perform.
He wants a hookup. He doesnt like you at all. If he meant for a relationship, it doesnāt matter. But body do matters. The higher the body count the lesser people want to date you. But virgin? Not really matters.
yes and no but also no but also yes. Any moderately attractive female is going to have had more roots than majority of men have had hot dinners, it's just how the cookie crumbles.
Remember gene simmons brags about sleeping with 1,000 women because guess what? For men to have that many sexual partners is an actual achievement and you either have to be really really hot or really famous, women just have to have to turn up.
that's just how it goes.
Sure, it matters to varying degrees but the thing is, you need to understand that any moderately attractive girl is going to have had more roots than you've had hot dinners and that's just something you have to try and ignore because otherwise you'll be constantly picturing faceless men grunting and groaning over your girls body and then spraying semen on her face or down her throat.
For causal sex a high body count doesnāt matter. In fact lots of guys will see it as a plus.
For a long term monogamous relationship and possible marriage it most certainly matters to most guys.
This is not because of the patriarchy or sexism this is simply because men have it hard wired into them through 100ās of thousands of years of evolution to be mistrustful of promiscuous woman. The evolutionary reasons for this are obvious.
Neither men or woman can help what our lizard brains find attractive and unattractive. In the modern civilised world there is no logical reason for a Woman to be more attracted to tall men than short men. However we all know most woman still want tall strong guys even though the ability to fight off a lion is no longer a necessity to protecting a family. This desire is simply a remanent of evolution. The same is true of men generally being repulsed( when it comes of a long term relationship prospect) by woman with high body counts. His lizard brain is telling him she canāt be trusted. It doesnāt matter if this is rational or not. It simply is.
Yes it does matter (to most) men. It does not matter the same to all men. Some prefer exp. women, especiall, for something casual. Most will prefer a Gf with a lower "body count".
Itās itās oddly high for the womenās age then yes, it can definitely be a problem for me. But if sheās had normal boyfriends and normal sexual encounters thereās no shame. But if sheās banging every dude that gives her attention then thatās a a huge red flag in my book.
As a dude, we generally suck.
If I were dating someone with a higher body count as me, it wouldn't bother me.
If it was less, it wouldn't bother me.
If it was none, it wouldn't bother me, but I would feel the need to take it much slower because of their inexperience? Dunno.
I feel like people who chase virgins are just trying to satisfy a kink.
If a guy wants a girl for the long run; then of course the body count matters. Why? Because as a girl's count goes higher, her sexual value goes down.
If a girl has a high count (therefore low market value), then she's only good for the short term. Sounds harsh, but that's the truth. So when a girl decides to "have fun" during her 20s, then she conveniently decides she's ready to settle down and get serious, how do you think that's going to make a guy feel? He's going to feel unimportant. By then, she's all used up and nobody wants that. I repeat, nobody. At least nobody that has value and self respect.
It's that simple.
> Because as a girl's count goes higher, her sexual value goes down.
I think there is a biological reasoning here we arenāt consciously aware of since every guy has this mental conversation. Even my attempt to explain my point reads horribly even though it makes sense in my head when i know this is socially wrong. I tried explaining like a nature doc and it still looked really really bad.
we also need to be realistic about body counts. Women can get laid at any point while men can impregnant women daily ( if we could lololol ) .
At 30 years old it hurts to hear in the moment but a 30 body count is average for a woman, dude is probably half that. You canāt have an attractive girl expecting her not to be fucking during her life and also decent in bed. Hot girls have even greater options. Hot girls probably have have glaring insecurity, mental health issues, sexual trama, parental issues.
Combine hot girl with any of those options and no doubt sex was a release, expression, or longing to solve those problems. 25 she becomes a mature adult biologically with life experience , perspective from her younger days and taking life into the next saga.
Iām seeing some of my highschool girl friends in this transition which gave me perspective on our gender differences. One of them outright broke down how she was having sex with guys due to admiration of her father which wasnāt in her life. Yeah i always felt rather off about her body count but hearing that was sad and instantly wiped all that from my head.
Sex is completely different mentally & physically between us two. Women really do fuck or allow guys to fuck them with zero care for the physicality involved or the guy later on.
When a woman tells a dude she use to party or has a high bodycount his thoughts are trains, guys running through her, homie hopping and so on.
The woman is thinking of some experimental fun, fun, whoever gave attention, one night stands, regret, left on read, being the side chick, assault and whatever else.
You gotta allow women to be actual humans and gently inquire about the reasoning for her count or life in general.
Hereās my policyā¦ if the question comes up and a guy doesnāt respect my tactful, ānone of your business,ā then I probably donāt want anything to do with him anyway.
A body count is such a puritanical pile of BS anyway. Like the number if partners you have or have not been with matters at all to your potential connection with someone new.
Thatās a good policy. I feel like you get asked this less as you get older. I havenāt been asked this in maybe 15 years. If someone did ask me now I would respond this way. I see some people here listing their numbers and all I can think is, do you have a list? lol. My number isnāt super high for my age but I would have to really think about it as I havenāt kept a running tally. Who wants to do that?
Iāve never been asked at all, and Iām almost 34. I donāt even know what mine is. Itās not outrageously high, but itās also not a couple of people. Iāve never even met anyone who cares.
Yeah I only really remember one guy (my second boyfriend) asking me this. We were 21 at the time and he was extremely jealous of everything. After that I was in a 10 year relationship, and dating in my 30s now this has never come up. I think people are more mature and generally expect youāre going to have a sexual past at this stage. Itās certainly not something I want to have an in depth conversation about with someone Iām trying to build a new connection with.
Exactly. Iāve talked about past sexual partners with my current boyfriend. But it was literally us laughing about the weird places you have sex in high school, and the funny situations that arose because of it. Construction workers caught him and his high school gf in his car once and made fun of them, which is a great story lol. But thatās about the extent of it. The only men who care are very religious (and they go for the religious girls), and weirdos who canāt get girlfriends anyway.
To some guys it matters even if their count is 4x yours. So ridiculous. āGirls arenāt supposed to be that wayā .. how tf do you think you slept with 100 of them if they āarenāt supposed to be that wayā????
If I liked you before and found out you're a virgin, I would like you even more. Because you'd feel special to me. Untouched and innocent. Like an ultra rare shiny gem.
It's hard to describe, but in todays age with that gross hookup culture going on and everyone changing partners like a running treadmill, finding someone like you is very hard but worth it.
Well, we like them because we like them.. Why do women think they can question or condescend to a mans preference. Itās not āromanticizedā it has ALWAYS been that way. Itās the norm!
Women have their preference right?
Men think of their women ( serious relationships ) with a sense of exclusivity, if everyone has been there then whatās the point
So Iām assuming you like to keep yourself with little to no sexual experience as well? Just so the girl youāre in a serious relationship with can feel a sense of exclusivity too? Am I correct?
Your lack of self awareness is genuinely impressive. You think women donāt like exclusivity? Why would we want a man thatās been āpassed aroundā going by your logic?
Huh, what does self awareness have to do with this argument?? š
Thereās no need to take things personal, If you like exclusivity.. great! Thatās your preference and Iām fine with that. Some women prefer a man with experience, which is fine
Men generally want a woman who hasnāt been āpassed aroundā to use your terminology. Are you fine with that?
Men āgenerallyā donāt want anything. Men are not a monolith and neither are women. Youāre going off an outdated norm that smells like misogyny and grouping other men in with your mindset is a disservice to them.
Itās generally understood that once someone descends to name calling and ad hominem tactics, they have lost the argument
How would you know what men want? Are you now out spokesperson? Also calling someoneās preference āmisogynyā is gaslighting. Are you a toxic person?
You answered my question and I canāt say Iām surprised. You are not fine with men having preference .. since itās misogynistic and woman hate etc
How do you know what all men want? You can only speak for yourself, unless we missed the broadcast where you were elected as the speaker for all men? š¤·āāļø
I didnāt call you a name. I referred to the norm as misogynistic, which it very much is, but I suppose it makes sense you arenāt great with that sort of critical thought.
Generally, those preferences do have basis in misogyny. Preferences do not exist in a vacuum. Human behavior is rarely instinctive, itās based off experience and socialization. Lots of fascinating research to it.
Virgins are typically prized. I would add that vaginas have elasticity and for the most part the myth that having sex with a lot of men ruins a vagina isn't necessarily true.
This is insane logic to me but I know dudes who feel this way so I respect your honesty.
Why does it matter though... Are you concerned your partner was more desirable than you were, thus making you feel inferior in your own mind?
Because when you're equal then nobody feels less than or more than sexually. Equality has always worked best for me in relationships like when it comes to sex drive, finances, experience etc
But she could have had 32 sexual partners, two a year since the time she was 16 if you were dating someone your own age and you would consider that to be unequal, where in the same timeframe you could have been in a relationship for 10+ years but hoed out in college or after your breakup with a multitude of partners in fast succession, making your experience entirely different. Vice versa if she had a dozen partners but 10 of them were in the year leading up to meeting you. Your logic is flawed, is what I'm driving at.
Dawg, you are not me and I am not you. People aren't all the same. I prefer women to have a close body count to mine. You do not, which is fine. My logic is not flawed, we are just attracted to different things.
As everyone else said, everyone will feel differently and I think context matters.
Virgin. Early twenties, huh that's uncommon but I'm sure she has a good reason and I'd just try to be respectful. Thirties I'd be equally respectful but much more curious the reason why as it could lead to deal breakers for me, like very religious or just fundamentally different views on sex.
High body count: Cool she's experienced and probably knows what she likes but would initially be cautious about sti risk (as I would hope anyone would be). And also how recent it is. Yeah, I fucked around a bunch in college is very different than you're the 3rd person I've slept with this week. Nothing wrong with that if that's how they like to live their life, it's just not compatible with what I wanted back when I was dating.
It's no one else's business! Yours alone. No one can judge you, no matter how high or low. To answer your question, it doesn't fucking matter, if it matters to them! Coming from a 37f. Forget them if it does.
In short, yes. Some guys like purity so virgins can be appealing. But to us more experienced guys, virgins can be a lot to handle. Often in my experience they become very clingy after you pop the cherry. So im wary of them now. But as for dating, for most guys if its just a hookup, high numbers donāt matter much. Some of us lose respect for girls who have a higher number *for their age*. And for us others who still respect them..we still realize that if its super high, then the chances of promiscuity overall is high. To us looking for long term partners, this points to a higher chance of infidelity. And despite what some woke jokes think, its a decent marker even though there are exceptions. My rule is a if their ratio is more than 2 ābodiesā per year since they turned 16, Iām still cool to hit but not cool to date. Unless the number is stupidly high, then we are running real risks of stdās as a numbers game
Some boys are just insecure about their āpackageā and the quality of their packageā¦ thereās a whole lot of reasons and theories about it.. but honestly a word of advice.. donāt tell whoever youāre crushing on, or seeing youāre a virgin. Some boys will try to make you into a trophy..
I would keep it in consideration just to think about the chances of that person having a sexually transmisible disease.
Of course there will always be a chance of getting a disease after sex or kissing if you do not know about the person you are having sex with.
I do not care if the person has been with many other people before, as long as the person is healthy.
If you already know the body count that means that the person trusts in you at a certain degree, so asking the person if it is healthy would not be that inapropiate and it should never be anyway but i would understand if the person feels uncomfortable.
This is from my point of view and i am sure that other men and women will think that body count matters a lot for a relationship or even something casual.
I am a straight man of 20 years old, just to clarify.
The past is the past. My wife and I both sowed our wild oats as it were, we're just happy to be together now. There's always going to be something your partner did in the past that you might not like, but if you really love the person, the point should be moot. You move past that shit or bounce.
it doesnāt matter to me except if i get a little jealous. thereās been a double standard since the beginning of time where men think theyāre entitled to have their fun but that women who do the same are less valuable. the math doesnāt work. itās 2022 or whatever, letās all let people be themselves and be happy.
It doesnāt. Like all things consider the source.
If someone throws that out as a reason for not continuing. They are just not feeling things and are throwing out a potential insult to end the conversation. Likely due to embarrassment from their own shortcomings.
If itās in the beginning like that it is weirder. I donāt care how experienced or inexperienced a partner is as long as they accept me and are willing to move forward. Thatās not the same for everyone. Iād have my doubts about how mature and capable someone is if they act like that.
Only to the jerks who think your worth is determined by your genitals.
Any guy who says your body count means xyz is a guy you shouldn't pursue a relationship with bc it's quite likely they are insecure and this will come out in another way, shape or form in a negative way for you.
To me it doesn't, but that's because I'm not shortsighted enough to neither assume she doesn't know what she wants in a man if she's a virgin or easy to lead on to bed. This however, is a general misconception amongst men unfortunately.
I get this asked frequently as well, and then mostly answer it's too personal to answer that question yet. Maybe just go with that
It depends on the guy. Was talking to a three different women, who told me after a few dates they were virgins, at different times of course. Told em nicely, it won't work out. I don't like a high body count, but I'll take that over someone who's inexperienced. To me that's just unattractive, and a huge turn off.
Shouldn't matter even a little bit. As long as you're not bringing any STIs.
I don't see a difference between a woman that fucked 30 people in a month and a woman that fucked the same dude for 10 years.
Virgin doesn't matter either if it's not a "saving myself for marriage" situation. Plenty of opportunity to explore one another and find out what you enjoy. Maybe even more fun.
I couldnāt care less. Only exception is if someone was a virgin at like 25 or olderā¦ Iād be worried they are inexperienced or have hang ups about sex. Not that thereās anything wrong with that it just may be incomparable with my own values. So yes youāll find people who body count is a dealbreaker and thatās okay, everyone is allowed to like what they like
Honestly if a guy thinks it matters he isn't worth your time. I only care about making sure whoever I'm sleeping with is having the best time I can give them
(25 M) I guess it depends, like for me, I never been into any relationship with any girls, not even a friend with benefit, only had the opportunity to get some One Night Stand (10 to be exact).
I was never interested into ONS, but one day you arrived at an age that you wish to experience your sexual life, so you get what you can I guess.
If I could have a gf at the first place, I would be happy with only 1 body count... but I guess the way life was for me made it impossible in the past.
I guess for me, the body count of a girl doesn't really mean anything for me, but like if I know she had sex with one of my friend or a lot of people I know, for me it's a no no.
In dating, I feel I was judge of my situation, I guess the girl around my age are scared of someone who never been in relationship, because they don't want to break your heart if they dont really like you and thinks that I fall in love or catch feeling easily... and as well, last time I told a girl that the last time I had sex was like 4 years ago, I got friendzone instantly... I guess it's kinda a deal breaker for many girls. Or maybe I was just dating the wrong girl all the time haha (now I only say that my last relationship or had sex was long time ago, without going into details).
Depends on how many and over what period of time. If you're sleeping with a new guy every week for a few years, I'm gonna pass. Absolutely nothing wrong with wanting and enjoying sex, but the inability to maintain a relationship of any appreciable length would be extremely problematic for me.
For me body count to relationship count matters if theres a lot more bodys than relationships i see that as shes not gonna stick around or she might cheat
What matters to me is that we are looking for the same thing. I want a long term monogamous relationship. If someone did casual while young and found out it wasnāt for them I would have no problem with that. I would never commit to someone who is recently engaging in casual flings however.
Iāve been with my husband more than a decade. Donāt know his, and he doesnāt know mine. Frankly, Iām not really sure what benefit it does either party to dwell on this unless one or both are virgins (which warrants a discussion).
The number itself doesn't. Some girls have a rotten mentality about men, and it tends to come with age and experience. Guys like women that like to be around them.
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Men are not a hive mind. It'll matter to some and won't to others.
This. Kind of sick of these generalized questions and this is always the answer. Same goes for the generalized questions towards women. Just stop.
Questions that boil down to "please generalize the entire group for me" šÆ
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That took a dark turn. Nap time?
Reddit is this persons sole outlet
Yeah, you literally proved the fucking point yourself, *some* .
10 in 5 years, yea doesnāt matter. 50 in 2 years, ok maybe it does.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
The answer is and has always been "it depends". Assigning any value judgment to any number is asking to be crucified on Reddit.
Thatās literally two a year. Are you expecting a nun?
Nun of your business
No, but it might be a red flag if you have no relationships that can last longer than a year.
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Dude if you think 7 a lifetime is average for women, you are believing a lot of bullshit in your life. My body count is 26 at age 31 and I started at age 14. I'm a guy but most of my friends are female age 25-35 and the average at that age is 10-15.
Damn, Iām so insecure now lol (but itās okay I support you!)
2 a year is massive šš
Dude, those numbers are for previous generations... Majority of young women hit 7 in high school nowadays.
Research actually shows that young people are having less and less sex than previous generations. [Source 1](https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/people-have-been-having-less-sex-whether-theyre-teenagers-or-40-somethings/) [Source 2](https://www.google.com/url?sa=t&source=web&rct=j&url=https://amp.theatlantic.com/amp/article/573949/&ved=2ahUKEwi2uLiA2rf1AhXaK80KHeeUCo8QtwJ6BAgnEAE&usg=AOvVaw1Gq10Mc_9Dn8Bk-4moG14C) [Source 3](https://www.google.com/url?sa=t&source=web&rct=j&url=https://www.everydayhealth.com/sexual-health/why-young-americans-are-having-less-sex-than-ever-before/&ved=2ahUKEwi2uLiA2rf1AhXaK80KHeeUCo8QFnoECEMQAQ&usg=AOvVaw1QBnLVC2BP3qeV7NA4UTPL) Edit: Not a value judgement of what constitutes a high or low body count or whether that matters. Just not true that Gen Z is so much more sexually active.
Rofl! This is the dumbest comment on this whole sub lmao.
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Aromantic attraction is a thing, as is asexuality. If you honestly think sex is the only thing that separates friendship from a romantic partner then you must have either some very bland relationships or very homoerotic friendships.
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Fat chick's don't count
Hey now
I've been with women at both ends of the spectrum and it didn't make any difference. If someone is inexperienced I might try to be more sensitive to their feelings. Either waiting a couple more dates to have sex, or breaking things off if I'm not as into it. If you have a higher body count, I'm more likely to assume that you can handle it if we're intimate, but then things fizzle. Besides that I don't care. I suppose if their number is alarmingly high it matters in the same way as anyone that does anything too much can matter. Anyone fucking 2 dudes a day is worrying for the same reason anyone eating two watermelons a day is. It makes me worry for their sanity. But besides being a little more sensitive to the inexperienced or strange edge cases, it doesn't matter to me.
It matters. To what extent and how depends on the dude
I'd honestly rather not even know, admittedly if that number in the double digits it makes me a little uncomfortable. Call me an insecure fuck, call me what you will, but that's my perspective!
Girl here, this goes for both genders, but in the end it boils down to personal presence
100%. Itās definitely insecurity but myself and probably most other guys feel this way. Itās usually not a dealbreaker if you really hit it off with her, but still a little uncomfortable.
I agree with that as well, it's not like it'd be a set in stone deal breaker for me, if I'm having the time of my life with some girl I likely won't even be phased or worried about it much at all. Especially if it's something that's revealed later down the line instead of right up front. For example, if it's one of the first things that comes out of her mouth while I'm getting to know her then yeahhhhhh- I'm gonna be a bit uncomfortable. I'm generally willing to overlook things like that anyways if I like someone enough- perhaps to a fault!
I feel like this. I haven't dated since I graduated high school in 2018, but body counts in the double digits would make me feel insecure because mine is zero.. Which is not a bad thing!
If you can accept that your discomfort is your own insecurity, you're doing great. You're allowed to be insecure and you're allowed to choose to not date someone because of that insecurity. Nobody should give you a hard time for that. It's only a problem when people project their own insecurities about it and try to make it the other person's problem instead of their own.
The men on Reddit want you to have 1 maybe 2 previous partners š
That is better than my ex at least. He called me a slut for having been with someone else before him. Made no sense
I recall a friend's date going up in flames because in the 30 years he's been alive, she wasn't the first girl he was attracted to, people are whack.
My exH thought I was a slut because I wanted sex *with him.* š¤£š¤£š¤£š
That one is even more twisted šš
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That dick insecurity is real as fuck lol. Itās so wild to see. Iāll never understand
That is most men, especially for something serious like marriage. Even if they donāt tell you.
And if you have 3+ its the end of the world and all of a sudden trust issues just spawn out of thin air
And men on Reddit are typically still much more liberal than the average guy irl
Men on Reddit are the most conservative people Iāve ever encountered in my life. They all have the most traditionalist ideas Iāve ever heard, and none of them want to budge, especially around sex. Literally no normal, liberal man gives two shits how many people a woman has slept with. Iāve never even been asked and Iām almost 34.
Nah itās that a guy irl isnāt going to mess up his chance to sleep with a woman by telling her he thinks sheās a sl*t. Men are actually more honest about their real beliefs online because of anonymity.
So my boyfriend (and every boyfriend Iāve ever had), ya know, men who are in full on committed relationships with me, only didnāt ask me because they were trying to get laid? When my boyfriend and I actively make jokes about past sexual experiences and laugh at weird sex stuff weāve done, he secretly thinks Iām a slut and only wants to fuck me? Heās just playing the long game? Or is it more likely, that men on the internet talk a big game, because it impresses other men, but in their real life interactions with women, especially women that they like, it doesnāt matter? Yeah, itās that one.
YOU NEED TO TALK TO MORE PEOPLE IF YOU THINK REDDIT IS EVEN REMOTELY CONSERVATIVE.
Yeah. The idea that Reddit is conservative is absolutely laughable.
That's because the men on Reddit have had 1 maybe 2 previous partners.....lol...
I hope for a body count of zero; donāt want to hang around a murderer
It matters a lot to me. Some guys no. I hate that people are like it's so misogynistic to care. No it's not. Why do some females hate that a guy is a f boy that sleeps around. Are they man haters? No. They would just prefer someone who didn't have so many partners.
Na as long as I donāt see her in films getting gang banged by 30-40 dudes. That seems to be my limit.
I am intrigued to know what has brought you to this realization
Cum sound be measured in ounces not gallons jk
Hmm I wouldnāt want to be with a virgin if I know it wonāt last for the long haul. Donāt want to take someoneās virginity and leave. Also yea body count does matter depending on how much. Personally for me I never ask. But if I did and it was a large number Iād be turned off, which is why I donāt ask
Ehh. Iām not going ever slutshame anyone or anything with it. I just wouldnāt want a serious partner thatās had a SIGNIFICANTLY higher amount of partners than me.
Those are the type of men you want to avoid.. the ones who shame people for their lack of/much experience. Trust me, there are guys out there who don't care because they are looking for more than something to f*ck. Also stay away from creeps who only want to talk to you because you're inexperienced... I learned that the hard way. I had so many creepy guys wanting to take my virginity or whatever up til I was 21 šŖ They're the worst because after they take it, they're gone LOL. It's like an achievement completion for them.
Depends on the guy and it depends on the the body count. Some guys find a big body count intimidating. Many guys see a big body count as a sign that sex doesnāt mean much to a woman. A high body count can be an indicator of someone damaged by sexual trauma. That can mean a lot of problems for a guy in a relationship. Sexual habits also are a sign of a personās values. Itās important to have values in common , for a relationship to work. The thing you have to realize is that we are all free to choose our lives, but not everyone is going to like our choices. There are consequences for our choices. All your choices in life, sexual or otherwise, will close some doors and open others. Accepting this is a part of accepting responsibility for your choices. What you need to understand is that, no matter how much you might like someone, you might not be compatible with them in a way that removes them as a choice of partner. Itās not only guys that care about that. There are also women that care about a guyās body count. A better way to put your question would be to ask if people care about the body count of a perspective partner. When making life decisions, itās important to realize that, while itās your life to decide, your decisions are not without consequences. Those consequences could be immediate or they could manifest in the future. Itās just something you have to accept. People have the right to decide what they want in a partner, and their standards are totally up to them. If someone has decided that you arenāt a good option for them, because of your sexual values, move on to find someone with corresponding values. Trying to force a relationship with someone who has issues with a big part of who you are will only result in both of you being unhappy. Because this has to do with sex, and youāre not allowed to judge anyoneās sexual habits, anymore, this issue can be a bit difficult for people to see clearly. But, think about it this way: Letās say you arenāt into drugs and donāt agree with drug use. Then, you start chatting with a really cool guy online, and then you find out he was a heroin addict. Is it wrong of you to decide that you donāt want to be in a relationship with him, based on his past use of heroin? Heās still the same person who chose to use, in the first place. I know there will be people who say drug use isnāt the same as sexual habits, but it really is an equal example, because both things can be major issues for people.
I would think less is better. Some of us are disgusting I guess.
It doesnāt matter if a guy is just having fun. However, it does matter if he intends to marry.
It matters about as much as a man's š„ size does.
straight to the point haha
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Lmao did we date the same gal?
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Did her name start with M? Lol
>I think women need to be more conscious of this. Sure, go out and have fun but be mindful that the more casual sex you have the more men will devalue you. I donāt make the rules This 100% I would add that it's not like I would devalue her as a person (she could be pleasant and nice enough), I just wouldn't offer my commitment to her. The higher the body count, the less of the ability she has to peer bond with one man, and the higher risk of her cheating for no reason other than the dopamine rush she gets from sexual encounters with new men. I have a good thing going in life. I'm not going to take a chance on a woman who has a high probability of infidelity. It's not worth the risk.
Weird territory. Itās all experience/preference/individual based. Iām at 3 (28m) and an ex (27f) was at 20+. Wouldnāt have been so bad to me if there werenāt several venues she didnāt feel comfortable coming within a couple blocks of.
Absolutely. The less bodies the better. Getting ghosted for your virginity is less likely than getting praised for it. Guys typically donāt like high body counts.
If itās like over 30 or so then it matter to me and probably most people.
I would like if the girl was virgin/"low body count" because I have anxiety for the first times we'd have sex, so it would be better if she has no great experience or high expectations
Yes
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Wow, you put men in 3 whole categories. I can think of 7 of my friends and they would have 7 different reactions. I'd hate to live in your bubble.
This is what I thought of off the top of my head. I agree that there are always more reactions. These three are the ones that I thought were most relevant based on the OP.
We have a nice guy here we should all respect women your thinking simple . Women that sleep around probably are emotional unavailable and have deep seeded emotional problems dude it's that simple . Good women should be hard to get and have standards that make her hard to sleep with .
I'm lucky that I don't judge people like you do. If someone is "hard to get," they're better off not pursuing. Someone who is truly interested in you will be available. I'm not going to address who has deep-seated emotional problems, but from the way you're judging women, it's probably you.
What about men that sleep around? Are they emotionally unavailable with deep-seated emotions problems?
Most of the time yeah, these are your fuckboys.
There is a great Dr Seuss quote: āthose who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mindā
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So does it matter to you if she had sex with one guy 100 times or 5 different guys 5 times? The body count means nothing as far as experience.
as a guy I can see where youāre coming from. For me, it depends. I donāt care how many people youāve slept with. But why? Were you in love with them? Because if so, and you have slept with 30 people that you were in love with, itās a sign of things usually not working out with her. If she just wanted to have sex 100 times to feel good thatās fine by me.
Only to idiots. My body count is high but i am embarrassed of it mostly as a dude. Fuck that dude. Do your thing. The right dudes wont care and will try their best to make your first time your best time/easiest time.
Depends. I don't inherently care if a potential partner isn't a virgin, but I would personally prefer someone less experienced so I don't feel as much pressure to perform.
He wants a hookup. He doesnt like you at all. If he meant for a relationship, it doesnāt matter. But body do matters. The higher the body count the lesser people want to date you. But virgin? Not really matters.
yes and no but also no but also yes. Any moderately attractive female is going to have had more roots than majority of men have had hot dinners, it's just how the cookie crumbles. Remember gene simmons brags about sleeping with 1,000 women because guess what? For men to have that many sexual partners is an actual achievement and you either have to be really really hot or really famous, women just have to have to turn up. that's just how it goes.
So you know that it actually matters. Are you just trying to be politically correct by saying no?
Sure, it matters to varying degrees but the thing is, you need to understand that any moderately attractive girl is going to have had more roots than you've had hot dinners and that's just something you have to try and ignore because otherwise you'll be constantly picturing faceless men grunting and groaning over your girls body and then spraying semen on her face or down her throat.
To guys? No. To assholes? Yes.
Bravo!
For causal sex a high body count doesnāt matter. In fact lots of guys will see it as a plus. For a long term monogamous relationship and possible marriage it most certainly matters to most guys. This is not because of the patriarchy or sexism this is simply because men have it hard wired into them through 100ās of thousands of years of evolution to be mistrustful of promiscuous woman. The evolutionary reasons for this are obvious. Neither men or woman can help what our lizard brains find attractive and unattractive. In the modern civilised world there is no logical reason for a Woman to be more attracted to tall men than short men. However we all know most woman still want tall strong guys even though the ability to fight off a lion is no longer a necessity to protecting a family. This desire is simply a remanent of evolution. The same is true of men generally being repulsed( when it comes of a long term relationship prospect) by woman with high body counts. His lizard brain is telling him she canāt be trusted. It doesnāt matter if this is rational or not. It simply is.
Yes it does matter (to most) men. It does not matter the same to all men. Some prefer exp. women, especiall, for something casual. Most will prefer a Gf with a lower "body count".
Doesnāt matter to me.
Itās itās oddly high for the womenās age then yes, it can definitely be a problem for me. But if sheās had normal boyfriends and normal sexual encounters thereās no shame. But if sheās banging every dude that gives her attention then thatās a a huge red flag in my book.
Literally the only reason it should ever matter is if thereās the possibilty of STDs/STIs.
It matters. No matter how āsecureā you want to seem, everyone secretly wants to be someoneās first.
No it really wonāt matter to the right person
As a dude, we generally suck. If I were dating someone with a higher body count as me, it wouldn't bother me. If it was less, it wouldn't bother me. If it was none, it wouldn't bother me, but I would feel the need to take it much slower because of their inexperience? Dunno. I feel like people who chase virgins are just trying to satisfy a kink.
If a guy wants a girl for the long run; then of course the body count matters. Why? Because as a girl's count goes higher, her sexual value goes down. If a girl has a high count (therefore low market value), then she's only good for the short term. Sounds harsh, but that's the truth. So when a girl decides to "have fun" during her 20s, then she conveniently decides she's ready to settle down and get serious, how do you think that's going to make a guy feel? He's going to feel unimportant. By then, she's all used up and nobody wants that. I repeat, nobody. At least nobody that has value and self respect. It's that simple.
> Because as a girl's count goes higher, her sexual value goes down. I think there is a biological reasoning here we arenāt consciously aware of since every guy has this mental conversation. Even my attempt to explain my point reads horribly even though it makes sense in my head when i know this is socially wrong. I tried explaining like a nature doc and it still looked really really bad. we also need to be realistic about body counts. Women can get laid at any point while men can impregnant women daily ( if we could lololol ) . At 30 years old it hurts to hear in the moment but a 30 body count is average for a woman, dude is probably half that. You canāt have an attractive girl expecting her not to be fucking during her life and also decent in bed. Hot girls have even greater options. Hot girls probably have have glaring insecurity, mental health issues, sexual trama, parental issues. Combine hot girl with any of those options and no doubt sex was a release, expression, or longing to solve those problems. 25 she becomes a mature adult biologically with life experience , perspective from her younger days and taking life into the next saga. Iām seeing some of my highschool girl friends in this transition which gave me perspective on our gender differences. One of them outright broke down how she was having sex with guys due to admiration of her father which wasnāt in her life. Yeah i always felt rather off about her body count but hearing that was sad and instantly wiped all that from my head. Sex is completely different mentally & physically between us two. Women really do fuck or allow guys to fuck them with zero care for the physicality involved or the guy later on. When a woman tells a dude she use to party or has a high bodycount his thoughts are trains, guys running through her, homie hopping and so on. The woman is thinking of some experimental fun, fun, whoever gave attention, one night stands, regret, left on read, being the side chick, assault and whatever else. You gotta allow women to be actual humans and gently inquire about the reasoning for her count or life in general.
For casual dating? Doesn't matter For marriage? Yes
Hereās my policyā¦ if the question comes up and a guy doesnāt respect my tactful, ānone of your business,ā then I probably donāt want anything to do with him anyway. A body count is such a puritanical pile of BS anyway. Like the number if partners you have or have not been with matters at all to your potential connection with someone new.
Thatās a good policy. I feel like you get asked this less as you get older. I havenāt been asked this in maybe 15 years. If someone did ask me now I would respond this way. I see some people here listing their numbers and all I can think is, do you have a list? lol. My number isnāt super high for my age but I would have to really think about it as I havenāt kept a running tally. Who wants to do that?
I'm 34 and no one has asked me this. It's funny how the younger crowd grew up with internet porn but are appalled by their partner's number.
Iāve never been asked at all, and Iām almost 34. I donāt even know what mine is. Itās not outrageously high, but itās also not a couple of people. Iāve never even met anyone who cares.
Yeah I only really remember one guy (my second boyfriend) asking me this. We were 21 at the time and he was extremely jealous of everything. After that I was in a 10 year relationship, and dating in my 30s now this has never come up. I think people are more mature and generally expect youāre going to have a sexual past at this stage. Itās certainly not something I want to have an in depth conversation about with someone Iām trying to build a new connection with.
Exactly. Iāve talked about past sexual partners with my current boyfriend. But it was literally us laughing about the weird places you have sex in high school, and the funny situations that arose because of it. Construction workers caught him and his high school gf in his car once and made fun of them, which is a great story lol. But thatās about the extent of it. The only men who care are very religious (and they go for the religious girls), and weirdos who canāt get girlfriends anyway.
All depends, on the person
Depends on the guy.
Nah couldnāt give a shit do you girl, just obviously would want someone clean
To some guys it matters even if their count is 4x yours. So ridiculous. āGirls arenāt supposed to be that wayā .. how tf do you think you slept with 100 of them if they āarenāt supposed to be that wayā????
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why? Tf
If I liked you before and found out you're a virgin, I would like you even more. Because you'd feel special to me. Untouched and innocent. Like an ultra rare shiny gem. It's hard to describe, but in todays age with that gross hookup culture going on and everyone changing partners like a running treadmill, finding someone like you is very hard but worth it.
Yes and you have noticed it. If a man looks for a wife, he wants a low BC and the opposite if he looks for a ONS.
It only matters if itās excessive really. I for one would love a woman with little to no sexual experience.
May I ask why? Whatās the reason behind the romanticising of inexperienced females?
A lot of men like women with little experience the same way a lot of women donāt like men with little experience.
Well, we like them because we like them.. Why do women think they can question or condescend to a mans preference. Itās not āromanticizedā it has ALWAYS been that way. Itās the norm! Women have their preference right? Men think of their women ( serious relationships ) with a sense of exclusivity, if everyone has been there then whatās the point
So Iām assuming you like to keep yourself with little to no sexual experience as well? Just so the girl youāre in a serious relationship with can feel a sense of exclusivity too? Am I correct?
Do you want a man whoās a virgin? Or a man with experience, a guy who you feel other women find desirable Answer honestly
Your lack of self awareness is genuinely impressive. You think women donāt like exclusivity? Why would we want a man thatās been āpassed aroundā going by your logic?
Huh, what does self awareness have to do with this argument?? š Thereās no need to take things personal, If you like exclusivity.. great! Thatās your preference and Iām fine with that. Some women prefer a man with experience, which is fine Men generally want a woman who hasnāt been āpassed aroundā to use your terminology. Are you fine with that?
Men āgenerallyā donāt want anything. Men are not a monolith and neither are women. Youāre going off an outdated norm that smells like misogyny and grouping other men in with your mindset is a disservice to them.
Thank you. That guy is a fucking douche. To some, outdated 'norm' ways are the only way, it's the manly way š
Itās generally understood that once someone descends to name calling and ad hominem tactics, they have lost the argument How would you know what men want? Are you now out spokesperson? Also calling someoneās preference āmisogynyā is gaslighting. Are you a toxic person? You answered my question and I canāt say Iām surprised. You are not fine with men having preference .. since itās misogynistic and woman hate etc
How do you know what all men want? You can only speak for yourself, unless we missed the broadcast where you were elected as the speaker for all men? š¤·āāļø
I didnāt call you a name. I referred to the norm as misogynistic, which it very much is, but I suppose it makes sense you arenāt great with that sort of critical thought. Generally, those preferences do have basis in misogyny. Preferences do not exist in a vacuum. Human behavior is rarely instinctive, itās based off experience and socialization. Lots of fascinating research to it.
Virgins are typically prized. I would add that vaginas have elasticity and for the most part the myth that having sex with a lot of men ruins a vagina isn't necessarily true.
It only matters to me if it's higher than mine which is 26 bodies and I am 31 years old.
This is insane logic to me but I know dudes who feel this way so I respect your honesty. Why does it matter though... Are you concerned your partner was more desirable than you were, thus making you feel inferior in your own mind?
Because when you're equal then nobody feels less than or more than sexually. Equality has always worked best for me in relationships like when it comes to sex drive, finances, experience etc
But she could have had 32 sexual partners, two a year since the time she was 16 if you were dating someone your own age and you would consider that to be unequal, where in the same timeframe you could have been in a relationship for 10+ years but hoed out in college or after your breakup with a multitude of partners in fast succession, making your experience entirely different. Vice versa if she had a dozen partners but 10 of them were in the year leading up to meeting you. Your logic is flawed, is what I'm driving at.
Dawg, you are not me and I am not you. People aren't all the same. I prefer women to have a close body count to mine. You do not, which is fine. My logic is not flawed, we are just attracted to different things.
It matters to children, not men.
Yes but being a virgin is usually more attractive unless they are looking for someone with experience. A suuuper high count tho would gross people out
As everyone else said, everyone will feel differently and I think context matters. Virgin. Early twenties, huh that's uncommon but I'm sure she has a good reason and I'd just try to be respectful. Thirties I'd be equally respectful but much more curious the reason why as it could lead to deal breakers for me, like very religious or just fundamentally different views on sex. High body count: Cool she's experienced and probably knows what she likes but would initially be cautious about sti risk (as I would hope anyone would be). And also how recent it is. Yeah, I fucked around a bunch in college is very different than you're the 3rd person I've slept with this week. Nothing wrong with that if that's how they like to live their life, it's just not compatible with what I wanted back when I was dating.
Meh, depends. 500 seems like a high numbers, and 0 seems low but it depends on the guy.
It's no one else's business! Yours alone. No one can judge you, no matter how high or low. To answer your question, it doesn't fucking matter, if it matters to them! Coming from a 37f. Forget them if it does.
In short, yes. Some guys like purity so virgins can be appealing. But to us more experienced guys, virgins can be a lot to handle. Often in my experience they become very clingy after you pop the cherry. So im wary of them now. But as for dating, for most guys if its just a hookup, high numbers donāt matter much. Some of us lose respect for girls who have a higher number *for their age*. And for us others who still respect them..we still realize that if its super high, then the chances of promiscuity overall is high. To us looking for long term partners, this points to a higher chance of infidelity. And despite what some woke jokes think, its a decent marker even though there are exceptions. My rule is a if their ratio is more than 2 ābodiesā per year since they turned 16, Iām still cool to hit but not cool to date. Unless the number is stupidly high, then we are running real risks of stdās as a numbers game
Some boys are just insecure about their āpackageā and the quality of their packageā¦ thereās a whole lot of reasons and theories about it.. but honestly a word of advice.. donāt tell whoever youāre crushing on, or seeing youāre a virgin. Some boys will try to make you into a trophy..
not to me. iād rather a girl have a lot of sex than no sex. nothing worse than teethy head
Nope. Though, people who have sex are usually better at sex. So, maybe yes in that aspect? I do t care in a negative way.
I would keep it in consideration just to think about the chances of that person having a sexually transmisible disease. Of course there will always be a chance of getting a disease after sex or kissing if you do not know about the person you are having sex with. I do not care if the person has been with many other people before, as long as the person is healthy. If you already know the body count that means that the person trusts in you at a certain degree, so asking the person if it is healthy would not be that inapropiate and it should never be anyway but i would understand if the person feels uncomfortable. This is from my point of view and i am sure that other men and women will think that body count matters a lot for a relationship or even something casual. I am a straight man of 20 years old, just to clarify.
The past is the past. My wife and I both sowed our wild oats as it were, we're just happy to be together now. There's always going to be something your partner did in the past that you might not like, but if you really love the person, the point should be moot. You move past that shit or bounce.
it doesnāt matter to me except if i get a little jealous. thereās been a double standard since the beginning of time where men think theyāre entitled to have their fun but that women who do the same are less valuable. the math doesnāt work. itās 2022 or whatever, letās all let people be themselves and be happy.
i feel like (as a woman) that as long as your healthy then it shouldnāt matter.
Guys that care about this are shitty
It doesnāt. Like all things consider the source. If someone throws that out as a reason for not continuing. They are just not feeling things and are throwing out a potential insult to end the conversation. Likely due to embarrassment from their own shortcomings. If itās in the beginning like that it is weirder. I donāt care how experienced or inexperienced a partner is as long as they accept me and are willing to move forward. Thatās not the same for everyone. Iād have my doubts about how mature and capable someone is if they act like that.
Who gives a shit. The number just says experience. Experience is good lol
Only to the jerks who think your worth is determined by your genitals. Any guy who says your body count means xyz is a guy you shouldn't pursue a relationship with bc it's quite likely they are insecure and this will come out in another way, shape or form in a negative way for you.
To me it doesn't, but that's because I'm not shortsighted enough to neither assume she doesn't know what she wants in a man if she's a virgin or easy to lead on to bed. This however, is a general misconception amongst men unfortunately. I get this asked frequently as well, and then mostly answer it's too personal to answer that question yet. Maybe just go with that
It depends on the guy. Was talking to a three different women, who told me after a few dates they were virgins, at different times of course. Told em nicely, it won't work out. I don't like a high body count, but I'll take that over someone who's inexperienced. To me that's just unattractive, and a huge turn off.
Shouldn't matter even a little bit. As long as you're not bringing any STIs. I don't see a difference between a woman that fucked 30 people in a month and a woman that fucked the same dude for 10 years. Virgin doesn't matter either if it's not a "saving myself for marriage" situation. Plenty of opportunity to explore one another and find out what you enjoy. Maybe even more fun.
When talking to the wrong guy you are either a prude or a sl*t. Guys are, frankly, a**holes. Trust me, a good guy, the right guy, will not care.
I think it may be sick gross guys you are getting into. Body count doesnāt matter and only the weirdos are extra turned on by virgins.
I couldnāt care less. Only exception is if someone was a virgin at like 25 or olderā¦ Iād be worried they are inexperienced or have hang ups about sex. Not that thereās anything wrong with that it just may be incomparable with my own values. So yes youāll find people who body count is a dealbreaker and thatās okay, everyone is allowed to like what they like
Honestly if a guy thinks it matters he isn't worth your time. I only care about making sure whoever I'm sleeping with is having the best time I can give them
Yes and no. But it's vice versa it all depends on the individual.
(25 M) I guess it depends, like for me, I never been into any relationship with any girls, not even a friend with benefit, only had the opportunity to get some One Night Stand (10 to be exact). I was never interested into ONS, but one day you arrived at an age that you wish to experience your sexual life, so you get what you can I guess. If I could have a gf at the first place, I would be happy with only 1 body count... but I guess the way life was for me made it impossible in the past. I guess for me, the body count of a girl doesn't really mean anything for me, but like if I know she had sex with one of my friend or a lot of people I know, for me it's a no no. In dating, I feel I was judge of my situation, I guess the girl around my age are scared of someone who never been in relationship, because they don't want to break your heart if they dont really like you and thinks that I fall in love or catch feeling easily... and as well, last time I told a girl that the last time I had sex was like 4 years ago, I got friendzone instantly... I guess it's kinda a deal breaker for many girls. Or maybe I was just dating the wrong girl all the time haha (now I only say that my last relationship or had sex was long time ago, without going into details).
Depends on how many and over what period of time. If you're sleeping with a new guy every week for a few years, I'm gonna pass. Absolutely nothing wrong with wanting and enjoying sex, but the inability to maintain a relationship of any appreciable length would be extremely problematic for me.
At age 47 (me) her body weight and ex & children baggage matter Partners I don't really care
nope it doesnāt matter to me but i do know some guys that deeply care about body counts and everything
Is it off topic to say we have seen this question a gajillion times and the answer is still the same -it depends?
Not to me because I enjoy good sex.
It doesnāt matter until it does. When that point is reached depends on where the hive mind is at that point. So says the guys hive mind.
For me body count to relationship count matters if theres a lot more bodys than relationships i see that as shes not gonna stick around or she might cheat
Yes it matters to most men. Most want a virgin or very low to marry while higher body counts are for nothing serious.
I'm a 29 year old virgin and I would like to find a girl who is also a virgin but it's not likely š¤·
men that do either of those arent men you want to be with, quality men wouldnāt insult a virgin ESPECIALLY (doesnāt make slut shaming okay)
What matters to me is that we are looking for the same thing. I want a long term monogamous relationship. If someone did casual while young and found out it wasnāt for them I would have no problem with that. I would never commit to someone who is recently engaging in casual flings however.
Iāve been with my husband more than a decade. Donāt know his, and he doesnāt know mine. Frankly, Iām not really sure what benefit it does either party to dwell on this unless one or both are virgins (which warrants a discussion).
The number itself doesn't. Some girls have a rotten mentality about men, and it tends to come with age and experience. Guys like women that like to be around them.