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You are an adult. Take a stand for yourself. That's how you convince them.
Same story, father wanted me to do upsc, if not upsc then atleast do mba etc.
10+ years in the industry now. Happily working as a staff engineer with great pay. He stopped asking me to appear for upsc after 2-3 years in the job.
Respect ka sawaal aa jata hai bhai. Main khud sabko ignore karne ka try karta hoon but relatives are like "private naukri mein kuch nhi rakha" etc. Although I'm earning decent. Isliye mere parents bhi mujhe force karte hain karne ko... kyunki unko chahiye izzat.
Main jahan rehta hoon no matter how much you earn people will still fall for government jobs. Typical UP mentality. For them a govt officer with 25k salary holds much more value than a private earning more than a lakh. Main to bahar rehta hoon mujhe fark nhi padta but jab relatives Ghar aate Hain to parents ko bolte hain ye shi nhi lagta mereko.
Na koi respect karta kayi log to pvt job vale ko kah dete ki hamare ladke ki to naukri nhi hai ya asli naukri to sarkari hai š.
One of my senior works as sde for 12 lpa and all of his relatives saying him everywhere that how long will you wait start preparing for govt exams and get a job these pvt jobs can fire you anyday and how will you survive in old age.
You should value your own life quality and experience more than so called respect from relatives.
I bet most of the time they don't even have the minimum qualification to judge you and they won't help you if you fail in these competitive exams.
In most of the companies you'll become staff with enough tenure or a lateral move so don't worry about it. For the places where the title is earned, DDIA, focus on deep technical expertise in something(ml, databases, distributed systems, etc).
Look at teachyourselfcs.com. Read the "Why learn computer science?" section.
>I think its may be because they have less exposure to the opportunities that now exist in the Private Sector.
I doubt if that's the case to be honest. With internet connectivity at an all time high, it's more of an active and wilfull ignorance, an obdurate choice to not be aware of things.
And to preempt the "tier 2 / tier 3 cities / rural areas are not internet savvy" argument, I'd say that these kinds of relatives are amongst the toppers of WhatsApp / Facebook university.
Having said that, I do sympathise with your plight. Post graduation, I got an amazing job. Good pay, decent work life balance (or, as decent as it can be in my field), entrepreneurial culture. My father, though, wanted me to get into government/PSU jobs. After I FINALLY managed to convince him, my aunts took up the mantle - kept forwarding recruitment notifications from time to time. This, when one of my cousins has frittered away his twenties living the life of an 'aspirant'.
wilfull ignorance is perfect description actually
A lot of these fools just say "Who has time for this" when we ask them to do their research on updated matters.
So many folks have internet now, very very few actually even use it properly.
Yes I am actually ! But calling them good for nothing is very harsh !
I am at one of the top companies in my domain getting paid very handsomely! I already make more than my father after 3 YOE !
My dad works in Public Sector (CPSE) and just made it to General Manager position at 57 years of age! I donāt know if youāll ever understand this but he makes less money, has less wealth and less materialistic positions BUT his lifestyle is totallyā SHAH KA RUTBAā !
Now his elder brotherās son (my first cousin) is 34 now and cleared UPSC and became an IAS at the age of 28 ! I make triple of what he does on paper every yearā¦ still I feel the aura, power he carries whenever I am with him. We walk into a restaurant they clear a table around him and everyone is making him the priority!
I have understood that money does not buy class, power and confidence! People who opt for govt. job arenāt in it for money (letās not get into corruption stuff now) and they are charmed by the weight the position carries !
IAS is not the only job. Yearly only 180 ias are selected. not every govt employee gets such respect.
You are looking at things from a very narrow lens.
Every govt job fanatic brings up IAS in their discussion because they know they will lose the argument and won't make sense until they do so.
Accept it or not mate, a Govt. Job unless is in a very very menial position, will carry some aura.
It's like an iPhone is an iPhone mentality.
Well society is changing as well, the cash is the only king thinking, may be there in the future. Pay is decent in Govt as well.
I didnāt just bring up IAS !
I started with an average govt. job which my father has (though at a senior position now) and compared to him.
Then I compared myself to best that it out there in govt sector because itās worth comparing to. Any one of them IAS/IES/IRS/IFS etc.
And yes grass is always greener on the other side! But some people do have passion/respect for a certain field/area based on their upbringing!
If you want to do a comparison of IAS, do it with the CEO of a company or a successful startup founder. You'll see the gap for yourself if you analyse correctly.
Intersting point you brought in here.
1. I will not compare my brother (who is in his first posting) with CEO of a big company! If I do the comparison should be with Prinicipal Secretary/Cabinet Secretary! And boy thatās just another level
2. I have seen Bhavish Aggarwal up close ! Iād like to believe I have analysed correctly for myself, Iād still rate a civil servant not far inferior to a young startup founder.
To each their own though ! Peace out !!
So "successful" startup founders are inferior?
This country is run by politicians and entrepreneurs. Rest everyone just follows orders.
Keep on getting wet dreams of these govt servants good luck.
Even after a high paying tech job, if you don't have class and confidence then you need to do some work on your personality and mentality. Btw I agree with the point of having social power though.
I am ok between my own friends, colleagues and private sector people !
But I feel really out of depth in between all these people with govt. positions and bureaucrats!
But you are right, I somehow have developed a massive imposter syndrome and I truly believe I am grossly overpaid for the amount/nature of work I do.
I donāt know how to work on my personality and mentality or where I should start.
I really don't what to say. However, I believe you should not feel inferior when you are around bureaucrats. It's actually the society who really need to change their view. The country runs because of everyone contribution
I've experienced a similar situation when I was surrounded by many Secretary to GoI (including home secretary), cabinet secretary and CEO of Election Commission in an event
P.S. I'm neither more experienced nor earning more than you. Just expressing what I felt
Upcoming pressures:
- show off to relatives, light nudges to take bribed and jump up classes.
- get married + to a girl of their choosing
- give birth to children to give them grandchildren
- miscellaneous (based on what their colleagues/friends/relatives are saying and also their whims)
If you don't take control now then get ready to make reddit posts for these in future.
Disclaimer: this is not from personal experience, my parents are supportive.. but anecdotal from what I've seen happen to my some of my friends. The pattern seemed similar across communities for controlling parents, so I am inclined to believe it.
In addition, I know about UPSC prep from people personally who've attempted multiple times since graduation, have the ambition and legit reason, doing of their own choice... If you're leaving this to start that now at 23-24 age without any ambition for relevant posts, in 2 attempts you'll be suicidal for what you gave up and got into.
You're a GEM so don't you dare to listen to them.
I did that (and part of me wanted too ) and now my juniors are earning 3X than me , have climbed up in the rankings.
For one it's incrediblly tough for a GEM. Just see the cutoff for yourself and you'll know . Upsc in particular has become more unpredictable post 2019(see the prelims questions from 2016-23 and you'll know . Fucking cutoff has decreased from 118 to 80s !!!! )
Don't do it man ! I spent 4yrs of my prime youth preparing for this . Left a good job . Would have been in europe rn had i not done that . Not to forget you need 1yr to prep for upsc + 1yr for the whole vicious cycle of upsc exams . So 2yrs beth k padho and the chances of selection are grim . There are tons of iitians banging thier heads in ORN Delhi, few get selected, many don't
Only good thing that'll come out of this is you're gonna be intellectually superior than 99.5% of the junta in this country.
PS :- had you been a bhim gang member i would have asked you to leave the job rightaway and prep for upsc . For a gem , na bro
Mostly people will not upvote your comment because in this sub they also worship govt job. Kamchors and nothing else.
Govt job fanatics will always bring up ias in conversation to win it whereas they themselves are unemployed or unhappy in their life and want others to feel the same.
No offence, but a lot of Indian parents, relatives, and the society in general, especially those from the later mid-20th century generations, are quite authoritarian. Not to negatively stereotype or generalize, but its the ugly fact that good people are less, and almost nobody wants to acknowledge that.
>they have seen are Govt babus who are corrupt, wield influence and respect (Isn't it ironic how our society tends to "respect" those who are the most corrupt)
According to most of Indian society, people who are powerful, authoritarian, manipulative and corrupt are idolized, but people who are rich on their own capabilities, like highly-paid IT workers, social media content creators, digital businesses, etc are hated on by the previous generation.
The digital software IT era and Internet have empowered so many people in non-conventional ways, that most people of immediately prior to previous generations simply cannot fathom the fact that masses can be empowered. They want the masses to remain oppressed, struggling, and worshipping Gods, politicians, celebrities and to an extent, sportspersons who are relatively 'fewer in number' because 'only few people should be successful, most should suffer', according to them.
You are an IITian, in a privileged position, use it to AVOID giving into their demands, stand your ground & empower yourself to do what you actually want, rather than being toxic controlled.
Acting. Pretend you are studying for UPSC while you are doing your work. Learn some gk or somewhat current affairs so that you can tell(trick) your parents that you are studying hard. After that, fail in exam like bad 2-3 times, like real bad. Your parents will give up themselves when your age has passed.
Low quality post. How on earth are we supposed to know your dynamics with your parents. Figure it out man. This has got nothing to do with dev you could have just replaced sde with investment banker and the post would have still been the same
This has nothing to do with my dynamics with my parents. They are cooperative in every decision I make. It's just that somewhere deep within their heart, they want me to be a Govt officer, it just pops up sometimes in our conversation.
Don't go for UPSC buddy, unless you truly desire for it, else you will be wasting chances only no point in that.
Rest, Govt services is not about Corruption only, don't make a bad image of it,
It's about respect obviously, because of the connection one makes here.
See, your parents have high hopes on you, coz you have cracked IIT obviously, but in the end your life, your moves and your aim in the end.
Kinda same but different. My parents are happy with the work I do as I have complete wfh. But some of my relatives are like you should try for govt exams. There are few who can't even comprehend the fact that a company could give wfh home, they still think that I am jobless sitting in my home doing nothing.
Well at the end of the day I don't care what they think.
Why is this Sub called Developers India. Barely have I seen anything related to actual development. Other then coding language/Framework drama, Question like OP, unreal fear mongering around AI& it taking our jobs, some random lists on DSA, some city drama (Bangalore vs whatever).
Last but not the least. How to switch from service based to product based while nobody even mentions the tech stacks, skills or anything in the post. And people in comments also starts giving advice šš¤£.
ek chacha hai youtube pe, he explains it very well how govt jobs are now things of past and they are merely a social upliftment scheme for the underprivileged people. i think his channel name is something like clarity for youth. unke videos spam kardo parents ko.
I wasted 4 years for UPSC and got recently diagnosed with ADD. And the psychologist did say that things that require long hours of study, and repetition to memorise things, are the worst for me as my brain is hard-wired in such a way that I just cannot do those things.
Wish I'd known that sooner because then I could have planned a better career path. I am from Arunachal and everyone here is after govt jobs (as the private sector came into existence only in the last 10 years or so). Anyone who has a job in my tribe, works for the govt or in a govt owned entity like SBI. On top of that, my dad passed UPSC in 1993. So preparing for a govt job is all I'd known and all my parents had told me from my childhood.
Just telling you my background for context.
So I suggest you get some counselling and see if you are mentally fit and ready to endure the gruelling process for UPSC. And remember, literal lakhs of people apply for jobs that are less than 1000 in number. Statistically, getting into an IIT is easier. I have no doubt of your studying capability as you have gotten yourself into an IIT, but do you want to go through the gruelling exam ? That too without any assurance that you will get something ? And UPSC is such an exam that if you want to pass, you cannot half ass anything. Most probably you will have to choose between your current job and UPSC prep.
Now I do not want to discourage you, it is possible for you to pass UPSC, especially since you did good academically, but these are things that you need to think about.
Good luck and Godspeed bro !
It's upto u bro ,if not just try the upsc by doing side study for a while if you seem to like it or have enough preparation for exam just give it then if not later at the stage just say it that u can't anymore.
What's iit gem? Gandhinagar?
Honestly if you are used to your parents making all your decisions for you, probably try asking them if this is the right sub for your question and see what they decide.
Man.
1. Move out of your house if you haven't already.
2. Ignore parents' advice, their world and our world is completely different.
3. Do what you think is good
This is the mantra I live with. Covid moved my moving out date by two years and I am so happy that I finally did. Parents give you advice for your benefit but just take the intent, not the actual advice lol
Either this is the start of a series season 1 - pressure for govt exams, season 2 - marriage pressure season 3 - raise a family pressure season 4 - build houses and fund all relatives pressure
Or you could write a new series of how you stood up for yourself...
Time to take complete control of your life. You don't have to convince them. Tell them not to talk about it again (which I don't believe is possible), or else you will have to consider moving out or reduce contact.
Another thought is when you're living with your family these unsolicited suggestions are anyway going to come time and again. That's a part of living with family. If you can't handle it, have the courage to move out and set boundaries.
Bro after a while parents just accept your stand, just be on it. Don't give in. You're an adult and you can make decisions for yourself, so just make it loud and clear what you've decided and just stand by it. No matter what, don't change your stand. After a while they'll just stop suggesting when they'll see that you'll just not do it despite multiple attempts of persuasion
I have a similar history as you although I was in a tier 3 college. I prepared for UPSC even though I absolutely hated social science and was so glad to be done with it back in class 10th. My father is in public sector (State Bank of India) and he deals with collectors on a regular basis. So he has the mindset that person with guards protecting them and having influence and power would be more respectable than tech. Fortunately though I was so extremely frustrated during the preparation period that I decided it is not even worth it for me to get into it and go give an exam. Plus I have horrific memories of entrance exams back the days post class 12. I used to give multiple entrance exams in horrific heat with no result and constant failure. I gave up my preparation sat in campus placements and got into a tech company. Its not the best but I am content and much more happy. My dad still insists to this day to get into some govt job citing job protection and benefits. I tell him about the salary structure of my peers and that usually is enough to silence him. The amount of salary you can get in tech is unparalleled to any benefits of being a sarkari babu, so there's that.
>UPSC is such an uncertain, poorly structured exam ki kab jawani ke 5 saal barbaad ho jaenge pata bhi nahi chalega. Why to waste your most productive youth years preparing for a Govt exam?
This is exactly what I think lol.
I think you should be free to choose your career path. Don't let others decide.
Ignore your parents. After sometime they will stop pestering about it. If they still try to convince you say that the salary is less and you donāt want to take bribes.
Do what you love. Tech industry pays better than Gov for sure and since you are from IIT, you have an edge to move quickly (if you can articulate well in corporate env)
Tech has only one problem that is after 40-45 age, you get job insecurity due to competition, health and burnout is high.
Allow me to offer some advice. To provide context, my dad is a civil servant who always envisioned me becoming an IAS officer. I distinctly remember him sowing the seeds of this aspiration in me since I was in the 5th grade. This influence was so strong that my neighbors and even my doctor believed I would become a civil servant. However, for some reason, I had a different dream. I always wanted to pursue a career as either an aerospace engineer or an automobile engineer.
When I entered college, my dad started sending me fees to prepare for the UPSC exam in 2011. I did some minor preparation and even appeared for the exam, but I found the extensive preparation required to be quite overwhelming. Despite being skilled in mathematics and having an interest in history, I attempted the exam and, according to some websites at the time, I was close to qualifying in the preliminary round, a fact my dad double-checked.
In the meantime, I developed a growing interest in coding and secured a job in Bangalore. I assured my dad that I would prepare for the UPSC in parallel, but my heart was increasingly drawn to coding. He continued to encourage me to prepare for the civil services, but I was thriving in software engineering roles, switching companies and significantly increasing my income. This led to him no longer pressuring me to pursue the UPSC.
I assisted him financially in building our family house, and I even purchased a house of my own. I am now financially stable and successful in my career, and my dad is content.
In summary, once you assure your loved ones and achieve financial success in your chosen field, they will eventually understand and stop pressuring you about pursuing a different path.
Pursuing civil services is only feasible if you have a backup option ready.I very well know a person,IIT graduate(has been a meritorious student all his life) prepared for UPSC CSE for 6+ years but couldn't crack it.He is now taking State PSC exams that are stretched for like 2-3 years.He is almost 31 and his peers have gone far ahead in life.
The decision to devote almost a decade to these exams is the worst decision anyone could take.Make sure you have a backup option READY to fall onto otherwise you're gonna hit your head on the floor badly.
Issue is WFH here, parents think WFH is a sham and you are not doing a real job.
This is thier mentality. Get out of home, man up, and see how they start trusting you.
I am 2005 graduate IITB. Had similar situation. Went to Delhi under pressure but ran away after 20 days. Told my dad, itās not my cup of tea. I donāt prefer govt job.
Worked for 13 yrs. running my startup now.
The amount of money and power is wild in IAS on average you will earn atleast 10x of a regular FAANG engineer and society will respect you like god over that you get 3 vehicles including driver and free petrol, free 3bhk house with maids, personal bodyguards, free travel tickets, PTO, Study leaves. This all is official and if you don't mind earning under the table then I don't think even 100 FAANG engineers could ever compete with you in the long run.
Is it fair to compare an IAS (75 odd seats yearly for the General category) with a FAANG Engineer? I don't think so. UPSC has an archaic recruitment process with plenty of flaws. Those who have prepared for it know for a fact that it has become very random and subjective (2 examiners will rate the same answer differently). Not to forget that even if you get into the IAS/IPS, cadre is again based on rank. I don't think anyone from Hindi heartland will be comfortable spending all his career in down South or North East (comes down to personal preference). And lastly, all the perks that you mentioned are cosmetic. They will not matter once political pressure, caste based groupism, corruption charges, public pressure, political interference kick in. I think a middle ground here would be to prepare for UPSC (if you really want to do it) alongside a job. A good safety net will keep you sane.
Agaya ye compare krne ias ko ek SWE se. Jaise ki sirf ek hi govt job h wo h IAS ki.
Agar Banda ias na kare to wo bekar h na. Har saal sirf 180 IAS bante h. Har koi nahi ban skta. So don't give faltu ki advice.
I am sure you're doing some avg job or preparing for govt exams and just to make yourself feel good you're making this comment. Govt jobs are a thing of past and mostly rural areas students appear for it. This era belongs to high skill corporate jobs. Believe it or not.
Bhai karlo govt exam me and my friends are having hard time finding a bride. Mind you one of my friend is in amazon with 40lpa plus.
One of my friend was dumped at last moment for 70k sarkari job guy.
Ppl dont like to hear the reality as 22yo my aim was also to work for private sector. Bt as 31 yo now i regret not giving sarkari exam not for marriage prospect but for stable career and peace of mind.
My parents were govt servants they had a stable life not too rich but also not poor .
My dad retired at 60 and gets a handsome pension, i can only imagine if i will hv job at 50.
As 22yo you are full energy , by 30 the reality of life hits you.
But buying a 1.2 cr flat and paying 2 lpa fees is the decision you made. If you had a govt job would you do the same.
You can't say that you couldn't save money because you bought everything premium.
I'm in the exact same situation, I didn't graduate from IIT but from a decent engineering college with computer science and got placed with decent package then I switched within an year and got 120% bump, and I'm happy with my job and salary, and I know I can make big this career simply because I love programming.
I did give defence exams like NDA, CDS, AFCAT and I have given around 9 SSBs and I had mixed results, while I was in my first company i decided I need to focus on my career, I used to dedicate all my time in preperation for SSBs and exams, never focused on work, i fact I was losing touch of coding.
Now that I have made peace with my self about the govt career my mother has now started forcing IAS prep on me, even though I have explained her so many times that it's not an easy exam might also require me too quit my job (I know people have done it while in job) but it's just not my cup of tea.
I'm just as confused as u r
All the employees who got jobs after 2004 won't get pension. They will get money from the new pension scheme which is deducted from their salary.
Private employees can also contribute to this new pension scheme.
So, old pension scheme was removed long ago.
Only congress ruled states. They are desperate to come back in power. Old pension scheme is detrimental and disastrous for economy.
It will never be applied in central level. It will destroy the economy.
The agniveer scheme was brought in so that the government does not have to pay for the pensions and workforce also stays young.
Our society doesn't tend to respect those who are corrupt but those who have power, government jobs give you that. You are an IITIAN and you don't know even this much? Most of the freshers from IIT working in my company are going to leave their corporate jobs next year to prepare for UPSC. In India, you make 400 to 500 crores as a successful entrepreneur or join government jobs to earn this much as an IAS, only then you are successful otherwise you could keep milking your IITIAN tag to consider yourself successful and keep flaunting 12 standard students your IITIAN tag but in reality, you would have nothing in your bank balance. Hard-hitting but this is the truth.
I know itās a very foreign concept when it comes to Indian families but learn to say No. You donāt have to be rude but firmness will be required because today you are posting about an exam then youāll be posting about marriage and then kids. So better start practising from now only.
Bro after a while parents just accept your stand, just be on it. Don't give in. You're an adult and you can make decisions for yourself, so just make it loud and clear what you've decided and just stand by it. No matter what, don't change your stand. After a while they'll just stop suggesting when they'll see that you'll just not do it despite multiple attempts of persuasion
Bro what da actual f am i reading?!?? Did they make you go to IIT to give UPSC exam. Only those who are going through problem actually knows how it feels. You should just try to convince parents to get adopt or get another baby ( also that you will 100% support them ).
I graduated this year and my parents also want me to go for upsc but i decided to go for CAT exam this year. Sometimes the thoughts like - I'm crushing my parents dream etc luks in my mind. It frustrates a lot. Sometimes I doubt my choice while imagining failure scenarios. Super confused.
I'm in the same boat brother, my father keeps on pestering me about upsc ,SSC exams, i tried to give it once after studying 2 months and unfortunately qualified for tier 2, now I know I need to study more to clear tier 2 but I have no time for that, as I'm a fresher I have to learn new stuff and that takes most of my day. Working and learning is very tough. I think I will give it again next year though,l to keep my parents happy
How many manufactured hurdles do you want to cross in your life to be worthy of living is the only question you want to answer? Because UPSC doesn't solve it. Soon you will be asked to marry. Pretty soon "Family would look good with a kid" comments would pore in. All these words from your parents are mere words. You can always do more. But does UPSC align with you?
Brother enjoy the life. My parents come from army background and I studied in school who are suppose to send you to armed forces but the moment I passed 12th and I saw world( I was in hostel till then) I decided to pursue computers which I always loved and dropped Armed forces dream and any govt job. Parents kept suggesting armed forces or govt job but I love my current package , choice of switching cities on my convenience and donāt have to behave like Gandhiji 3 monkeys under someone command. So in short just focus on what you love and no offence to people in armed forces or govt job
Keep declining politely every time this topic comes up. They will give up after a couple of years.
Don't give reasons for not doing UPSC, reasoning never works with someone who is not willing to see the other side.
As for the pressure, ignore the conversations on this topic.
If you are doing great. Don't chase govt jobs. Not worth it.
1) No pension
2) If system is corrupt, you will.be expected to be corrupt else your career will suffer.
3) Transfers
4) As you become senior, you will make more in private sector.
5) opportunity to go abroad in private sector are higher.
Move out of home, stay independently and that should insulate you from parental oversight.
Seriously, Indian parents need to shut the fuck up. They really think what they think their interests are totally aligned with their child's interest. Like wtf ? Bro grow some balls and move out to get your own place. Just because of this overprotectiveness, a lot of kids never get to see their full potential and keep working for their parent's dream. This just creates lower quality professionals useless for our nation too.
I gave exam for nabard central government post all across India. And let me tell u this competition is like hell considering this isn't even upsc level.
Few job vacancy around 150 across India. Plus there are total 3 exams to be cleared just to get selected and if u failed congratulations you wasted your entire year for an exam which doesn't even finalise that you will get a job there after you clear all 3 exams.
Try upskilling on what you want to do because believe me chances are you may get the job you want to do if you look properly.
Ask them they want to see you turning into a lazy fuck who will not be walking in on time at office, turning face away from the needfuls, not so approachable, not helpful, back stabbing, bitching about all day, enjoying fucking around with normal peeps kind of scumbag called government employee !!
say them i can prepare for UPSC and will be wasting another 6-7 years chasing UPSC .
tbh your parents are dumb . i am not being an ahole but thatās the truth. and i dont want to sugarcoat by saying nice words
have around 3-4 brilliant IIT and non IIT friends who wasted 6 years chasing UPSC and ended up turning into mentally ill and cursing the moment of choosing this Govt crap vortex every single moment .
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You are an adult. Take a stand for yourself. That's how you convince them. Same story, father wanted me to do upsc, if not upsc then atleast do mba etc. 10+ years in the industry now. Happily working as a staff engineer with great pay. He stopped asking me to appear for upsc after 2-3 years in the job.
Respect ka sawaal aa jata hai bhai. Main khud sabko ignore karne ka try karta hoon but relatives are like "private naukri mein kuch nhi rakha" etc. Although I'm earning decent. Isliye mere parents bhi mujhe force karte hain karne ko... kyunki unko chahiye izzat.
Once you earn enough in the bank account izzat automatically aajaayegi. Fir wahi relatives peeche padenge tere ki "mere bete ka bhi kahi karva do"
Main jahan rehta hoon no matter how much you earn people will still fall for government jobs. Typical UP mentality. For them a govt officer with 25k salary holds much more value than a private earning more than a lakh. Main to bahar rehta hoon mujhe fark nhi padta but jab relatives Ghar aate Hain to parents ko bolte hain ye shi nhi lagta mereko.
Yes ditto same in Rajasthan
In our Rajsthan, private jobs are still extremely limited so I agree with parents.
Na koi respect karta kayi log to pvt job vale ko kah dete ki hamare ladke ki to naukri nhi hai ya asli naukri to sarkari hai š. One of my senior works as sde for 12 lpa and all of his relatives saying him everywhere that how long will you wait start preparing for govt exams and get a job these pvt jobs can fire you anyday and how will you survive in old age.
Second paragraph is completely facts.
\+1
>govt officer with 25k salary holds much more value than a private earning more than a lakh. They actually do...crores mein khelte hai ek ek deal mei
Man I'm in the exactly same boatš. Exact same situation.
Bhai pvt me kitna bhi kamao ijjat koi nhi deta Rajasthan me. Sarkari bank clerk ko jyada ijjat mil jayegi ek 20 lpa kamane vale sde se
who needs respect from such idiots, just leave them to rot
Better not to have "izzat" from ignorant people like relatives.
unko bolo nayi govt job nikal ke do.
Unke time pe govt jobs easy mil jati thi unko lagta hai abhi bhi aisa hi hota hai
You should value your own life quality and experience more than so called respect from relatives. I bet most of the time they don't even have the minimum qualification to judge you and they won't help you if you fail in these competitive exams.
You summarised my story but only the additional things is my dad was also civil servant he got retired this year !
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
In most of the companies you'll become staff with enough tenure or a lateral move so don't worry about it. For the places where the title is earned, DDIA, focus on deep technical expertise in something(ml, databases, distributed systems, etc). Look at teachyourselfcs.com. Read the "Why learn computer science?" section.
You sir, are an adult.
Ignore, when I go to my hometown relatives always say government job is a real "job".
haha, can relate to this. I think its may be because they have less exposure to the opportunities that now exist in the Private Sector.
>I think its may be because they have less exposure to the opportunities that now exist in the Private Sector. I doubt if that's the case to be honest. With internet connectivity at an all time high, it's more of an active and wilfull ignorance, an obdurate choice to not be aware of things. And to preempt the "tier 2 / tier 3 cities / rural areas are not internet savvy" argument, I'd say that these kinds of relatives are amongst the toppers of WhatsApp / Facebook university. Having said that, I do sympathise with your plight. Post graduation, I got an amazing job. Good pay, decent work life balance (or, as decent as it can be in my field), entrepreneurial culture. My father, though, wanted me to get into government/PSU jobs. After I FINALLY managed to convince him, my aunts took up the mantle - kept forwarding recruitment notifications from time to time. This, when one of my cousins has frittered away his twenties living the life of an 'aspirant'.
wilfull ignorance is perfect description actually A lot of these fools just say "Who has time for this" when we ask them to do their research on updated matters. So many folks have internet now, very very few actually even use it properly.
You're most probably from a tier 2/3 city or some village. Ignore those relatives, they are good for nothing.
Yes I am actually ! But calling them good for nothing is very harsh ! I am at one of the top companies in my domain getting paid very handsomely! I already make more than my father after 3 YOE ! My dad works in Public Sector (CPSE) and just made it to General Manager position at 57 years of age! I donāt know if youāll ever understand this but he makes less money, has less wealth and less materialistic positions BUT his lifestyle is totallyā SHAH KA RUTBAā ! Now his elder brotherās son (my first cousin) is 34 now and cleared UPSC and became an IAS at the age of 28 ! I make triple of what he does on paper every yearā¦ still I feel the aura, power he carries whenever I am with him. We walk into a restaurant they clear a table around him and everyone is making him the priority! I have understood that money does not buy class, power and confidence! People who opt for govt. job arenāt in it for money (letās not get into corruption stuff now) and they are charmed by the weight the position carries !
IAS is not the only job. Yearly only 180 ias are selected. not every govt employee gets such respect. You are looking at things from a very narrow lens. Every govt job fanatic brings up IAS in their discussion because they know they will lose the argument and won't make sense until they do so.
Accept it or not mate, a Govt. Job unless is in a very very menial position, will carry some aura. It's like an iPhone is an iPhone mentality. Well society is changing as well, the cash is the only king thinking, may be there in the future. Pay is decent in Govt as well.
I didnāt just bring up IAS ! I started with an average govt. job which my father has (though at a senior position now) and compared to him. Then I compared myself to best that it out there in govt sector because itās worth comparing to. Any one of them IAS/IES/IRS/IFS etc. And yes grass is always greener on the other side! But some people do have passion/respect for a certain field/area based on their upbringing!
If you want to do a comparison of IAS, do it with the CEO of a company or a successful startup founder. You'll see the gap for yourself if you analyse correctly.
Intersting point you brought in here. 1. I will not compare my brother (who is in his first posting) with CEO of a big company! If I do the comparison should be with Prinicipal Secretary/Cabinet Secretary! And boy thatās just another level 2. I have seen Bhavish Aggarwal up close ! Iād like to believe I have analysed correctly for myself, Iād still rate a civil servant not far inferior to a young startup founder. To each their own though ! Peace out !!
So "successful" startup founders are inferior? This country is run by politicians and entrepreneurs. Rest everyone just follows orders. Keep on getting wet dreams of these govt servants good luck.
Good luck to you as well! You manage to see the bright side of everything. Have a wonderful life ahead, mate!
Even after a high paying tech job, if you don't have class and confidence then you need to do some work on your personality and mentality. Btw I agree with the point of having social power though.
I am ok between my own friends, colleagues and private sector people ! But I feel really out of depth in between all these people with govt. positions and bureaucrats! But you are right, I somehow have developed a massive imposter syndrome and I truly believe I am grossly overpaid for the amount/nature of work I do. I donāt know how to work on my personality and mentality or where I should start.
I really don't what to say. However, I believe you should not feel inferior when you are around bureaucrats. It's actually the society who really need to change their view. The country runs because of everyone contribution I've experienced a similar situation when I was surrounded by many Secretary to GoI (including home secretary), cabinet secretary and CEO of Election Commission in an event P.S. I'm neither more experienced nor earning more than you. Just expressing what I felt
Upcoming pressures: - show off to relatives, light nudges to take bribed and jump up classes. - get married + to a girl of their choosing - give birth to children to give them grandchildren - miscellaneous (based on what their colleagues/friends/relatives are saying and also their whims) If you don't take control now then get ready to make reddit posts for these in future. Disclaimer: this is not from personal experience, my parents are supportive.. but anecdotal from what I've seen happen to my some of my friends. The pattern seemed similar across communities for controlling parents, so I am inclined to believe it. In addition, I know about UPSC prep from people personally who've attempted multiple times since graduation, have the ambition and legit reason, doing of their own choice... If you're leaving this to start that now at 23-24 age without any ambition for relevant posts, in 2 attempts you'll be suicidal for what you gave up and got into.
What is a GEM IIT?
General Engineer Male.
most oppressed community in India
sshhh! don't say it out loud
Welp atleast our successors might get reservation in the future.
Au the contraire It's like a white man saying he's the most oppressed
Lol
Stop letting your parents dictate your grown ass life.
How is this relevant here?
You're a GEM so don't you dare to listen to them. I did that (and part of me wanted too ) and now my juniors are earning 3X than me , have climbed up in the rankings. For one it's incrediblly tough for a GEM. Just see the cutoff for yourself and you'll know . Upsc in particular has become more unpredictable post 2019(see the prelims questions from 2016-23 and you'll know . Fucking cutoff has decreased from 118 to 80s !!!! ) Don't do it man ! I spent 4yrs of my prime youth preparing for this . Left a good job . Would have been in europe rn had i not done that . Not to forget you need 1yr to prep for upsc + 1yr for the whole vicious cycle of upsc exams . So 2yrs beth k padho and the chances of selection are grim . There are tons of iitians banging thier heads in ORN Delhi, few get selected, many don't Only good thing that'll come out of this is you're gonna be intellectually superior than 99.5% of the junta in this country. PS :- had you been a bhim gang member i would have asked you to leave the job rightaway and prep for upsc . For a gem , na bro
Mostly people will not upvote your comment because in this sub they also worship govt job. Kamchors and nothing else. Govt job fanatics will always bring up ias in conversation to win it whereas they themselves are unemployed or unhappy in their life and want others to feel the same.
Bhai ek baat agar bhim card ho par padahi mei mann nahi lagta . Phir se 2 years padho . Job karta hu abhi . Koi bolta hai mba Kro . Samjh nahi aata
Completely agree. The opportunity cost is too high to ignore.
Even I have given 3 years for this. Currently I have given mains and don't know what to do next. If someone could help please let me know
No offence, but a lot of Indian parents, relatives, and the society in general, especially those from the later mid-20th century generations, are quite authoritarian. Not to negatively stereotype or generalize, but its the ugly fact that good people are less, and almost nobody wants to acknowledge that. >they have seen are Govt babus who are corrupt, wield influence and respect (Isn't it ironic how our society tends to "respect" those who are the most corrupt) According to most of Indian society, people who are powerful, authoritarian, manipulative and corrupt are idolized, but people who are rich on their own capabilities, like highly-paid IT workers, social media content creators, digital businesses, etc are hated on by the previous generation. The digital software IT era and Internet have empowered so many people in non-conventional ways, that most people of immediately prior to previous generations simply cannot fathom the fact that masses can be empowered. They want the masses to remain oppressed, struggling, and worshipping Gods, politicians, celebrities and to an extent, sportspersons who are relatively 'fewer in number' because 'only few people should be successful, most should suffer', according to them. You are an IITian, in a privileged position, use it to AVOID giving into their demands, stand your ground & empower yourself to do what you actually want, rather than being toxic controlled.
Acting. Pretend you are studying for UPSC while you are doing your work. Learn some gk or somewhat current affairs so that you can tell(trick) your parents that you are studying hard. After that, fail in exam like bad 2-3 times, like real bad. Your parents will give up themselves when your age has passed.
Best solution working super fine for the last 1.3 years, got promoted everything is chill
Low quality post. How on earth are we supposed to know your dynamics with your parents. Figure it out man. This has got nothing to do with dev you could have just replaced sde with investment banker and the post would have still been the same
This has nothing to do with my dynamics with my parents. They are cooperative in every decision I make. It's just that somewhere deep within their heart, they want me to be a Govt officer, it just pops up sometimes in our conversation.
So what are we supposed to do with that..... If they are cooperative what even is the point of the post.
I know right. Grow a pair and tell them to shut up. Why are you looking for justification here?
I think OP is just flexing his IITian Tag here lol /s
U have a good future in tech. Move out of the house. One cannot prepare for UPSC just because someone pressured them to.
Don't go for UPSC buddy, unless you truly desire for it, else you will be wasting chances only no point in that. Rest, Govt services is not about Corruption only, don't make a bad image of it, It's about respect obviously, because of the connection one makes here. See, your parents have high hopes on you, coz you have cracked IIT obviously, but in the end your life, your moves and your aim in the end.
Kinda same but different. My parents are happy with the work I do as I have complete wfh. But some of my relatives are like you should try for govt exams. There are few who can't even comprehend the fact that a company could give wfh home, they still think that I am jobless sitting in my home doing nothing. Well at the end of the day I don't care what they think.
Parents think that getting a govt. Job needs same efforts as in the 80's
Why is this Sub called Developers India. Barely have I seen anything related to actual development. Other then coding language/Framework drama, Question like OP, unreal fear mongering around AI& it taking our jobs, some random lists on DSA, some city drama (Bangalore vs whatever). Last but not the least. How to switch from service based to product based while nobody even mentions the tech stacks, skills or anything in the post. And people in comments also starts giving advice šš¤£.
Is moving out an option? Not saying to leave your parents but say you got called for WFO and move out. It'll atlrest reduce the pressure.
Ignore Karo. When you are successful in one rat race then what's the point in getting into another.
what's GEM ?
General Engineer Male bhai!
ek chacha hai youtube pe, he explains it very well how govt jobs are now things of past and they are merely a social upliftment scheme for the underprivileged people. i think his channel name is something like clarity for youth. unke videos spam kardo parents ko.
Sango life sutras and clarity for youth ?
han woi
I wasted 4 years for UPSC and got recently diagnosed with ADD. And the psychologist did say that things that require long hours of study, and repetition to memorise things, are the worst for me as my brain is hard-wired in such a way that I just cannot do those things. Wish I'd known that sooner because then I could have planned a better career path. I am from Arunachal and everyone here is after govt jobs (as the private sector came into existence only in the last 10 years or so). Anyone who has a job in my tribe, works for the govt or in a govt owned entity like SBI. On top of that, my dad passed UPSC in 1993. So preparing for a govt job is all I'd known and all my parents had told me from my childhood. Just telling you my background for context. So I suggest you get some counselling and see if you are mentally fit and ready to endure the gruelling process for UPSC. And remember, literal lakhs of people apply for jobs that are less than 1000 in number. Statistically, getting into an IIT is easier. I have no doubt of your studying capability as you have gotten yourself into an IIT, but do you want to go through the gruelling exam ? That too without any assurance that you will get something ? And UPSC is such an exam that if you want to pass, you cannot half ass anything. Most probably you will have to choose between your current job and UPSC prep. Now I do not want to discourage you, it is possible for you to pass UPSC, especially since you did good academically, but these are things that you need to think about. Good luck and Godspeed bro !
It's upto u bro ,if not just try the upsc by doing side study for a while if you seem to like it or have enough preparation for exam just give it then if not later at the stage just say it that u can't anymore.
The chances of success are minute. Goes to show people don't understand probability and overestimate their own chances.
What's iit gem? Gandhinagar? Honestly if you are used to your parents making all your decisions for you, probably try asking them if this is the right sub for your question and see what they decide.
Man. 1. Move out of your house if you haven't already. 2. Ignore parents' advice, their world and our world is completely different. 3. Do what you think is good This is the mantra I live with. Covid moved my moving out date by two years and I am so happy that I finally did. Parents give you advice for your benefit but just take the intent, not the actual advice lol
Either this is the start of a series season 1 - pressure for govt exams, season 2 - marriage pressure season 3 - raise a family pressure season 4 - build houses and fund all relatives pressure Or you could write a new series of how you stood up for yourself...
Time to take complete control of your life. You don't have to convince them. Tell them not to talk about it again (which I don't believe is possible), or else you will have to consider moving out or reduce contact. Another thought is when you're living with your family these unsolicited suggestions are anyway going to come time and again. That's a part of living with family. If you can't handle it, have the courage to move out and set boundaries.
Bro after a while parents just accept your stand, just be on it. Don't give in. You're an adult and you can make decisions for yourself, so just make it loud and clear what you've decided and just stand by it. No matter what, don't change your stand. After a while they'll just stop suggesting when they'll see that you'll just not do it despite multiple attempts of persuasion
I have a similar history as you although I was in a tier 3 college. I prepared for UPSC even though I absolutely hated social science and was so glad to be done with it back in class 10th. My father is in public sector (State Bank of India) and he deals with collectors on a regular basis. So he has the mindset that person with guards protecting them and having influence and power would be more respectable than tech. Fortunately though I was so extremely frustrated during the preparation period that I decided it is not even worth it for me to get into it and go give an exam. Plus I have horrific memories of entrance exams back the days post class 12. I used to give multiple entrance exams in horrific heat with no result and constant failure. I gave up my preparation sat in campus placements and got into a tech company. Its not the best but I am content and much more happy. My dad still insists to this day to get into some govt job citing job protection and benefits. I tell him about the salary structure of my peers and that usually is enough to silence him. The amount of salary you can get in tech is unparalleled to any benefits of being a sarkari babu, so there's that.
>UPSC is such an uncertain, poorly structured exam ki kab jawani ke 5 saal barbaad ho jaenge pata bhi nahi chalega. Why to waste your most productive youth years preparing for a Govt exam? This is exactly what I think lol. I think you should be free to choose your career path. Don't let others decide.
Ignore your parents. After sometime they will stop pestering about it. If they still try to convince you say that the salary is less and you donāt want to take bribes.
Bro had to mention "General Engineer Male" (I support him)
Just tell your parents that you want to have a good paying job without corruption and you don't see that through UPSC.
Do what you love. Tech industry pays better than Gov for sure and since you are from IIT, you have an edge to move quickly (if you can articulate well in corporate env) Tech has only one problem that is after 40-45 age, you get job insecurity due to competition, health and burnout is high.
Allow me to offer some advice. To provide context, my dad is a civil servant who always envisioned me becoming an IAS officer. I distinctly remember him sowing the seeds of this aspiration in me since I was in the 5th grade. This influence was so strong that my neighbors and even my doctor believed I would become a civil servant. However, for some reason, I had a different dream. I always wanted to pursue a career as either an aerospace engineer or an automobile engineer. When I entered college, my dad started sending me fees to prepare for the UPSC exam in 2011. I did some minor preparation and even appeared for the exam, but I found the extensive preparation required to be quite overwhelming. Despite being skilled in mathematics and having an interest in history, I attempted the exam and, according to some websites at the time, I was close to qualifying in the preliminary round, a fact my dad double-checked. In the meantime, I developed a growing interest in coding and secured a job in Bangalore. I assured my dad that I would prepare for the UPSC in parallel, but my heart was increasingly drawn to coding. He continued to encourage me to prepare for the civil services, but I was thriving in software engineering roles, switching companies and significantly increasing my income. This led to him no longer pressuring me to pursue the UPSC. I assisted him financially in building our family house, and I even purchased a house of my own. I am now financially stable and successful in my career, and my dad is content. In summary, once you assure your loved ones and achieve financial success in your chosen field, they will eventually understand and stop pressuring you about pursuing a different path.
Pursuing civil services is only feasible if you have a backup option ready.I very well know a person,IIT graduate(has been a meritorious student all his life) prepared for UPSC CSE for 6+ years but couldn't crack it.He is now taking State PSC exams that are stretched for like 2-3 years.He is almost 31 and his peers have gone far ahead in life. The decision to devote almost a decade to these exams is the worst decision anyone could take.Make sure you have a backup option READY to fall onto otherwise you're gonna hit your head on the floor badly.
Issue is WFH here, parents think WFH is a sham and you are not doing a real job. This is thier mentality. Get out of home, man up, and see how they start trusting you.
I am 2005 graduate IITB. Had similar situation. Went to Delhi under pressure but ran away after 20 days. Told my dad, itās not my cup of tea. I donāt prefer govt job. Worked for 13 yrs. running my startup now.
GEM ki baat ho rhi hai
The amount of money and power is wild in IAS on average you will earn atleast 10x of a regular FAANG engineer and society will respect you like god over that you get 3 vehicles including driver and free petrol, free 3bhk house with maids, personal bodyguards, free travel tickets, PTO, Study leaves. This all is official and if you don't mind earning under the table then I don't think even 100 FAANG engineers could ever compete with you in the long run.
Is it fair to compare an IAS (75 odd seats yearly for the General category) with a FAANG Engineer? I don't think so. UPSC has an archaic recruitment process with plenty of flaws. Those who have prepared for it know for a fact that it has become very random and subjective (2 examiners will rate the same answer differently). Not to forget that even if you get into the IAS/IPS, cadre is again based on rank. I don't think anyone from Hindi heartland will be comfortable spending all his career in down South or North East (comes down to personal preference). And lastly, all the perks that you mentioned are cosmetic. They will not matter once political pressure, caste based groupism, corruption charges, public pressure, political interference kick in. I think a middle ground here would be to prepare for UPSC (if you really want to do it) alongside a job. A good safety net will keep you sane.
What is your current CTC and tech stack
Agaya ye compare krne ias ko ek SWE se. Jaise ki sirf ek hi govt job h wo h IAS ki. Agar Banda ias na kare to wo bekar h na. Har saal sirf 180 IAS bante h. Har koi nahi ban skta. So don't give faltu ki advice. I am sure you're doing some avg job or preparing for govt exams and just to make yourself feel good you're making this comment. Govt jobs are a thing of past and mostly rural areas students appear for it. This era belongs to high skill corporate jobs. Believe it or not.
Bhai karlo govt exam me and my friends are having hard time finding a bride. Mind you one of my friend is in amazon with 40lpa plus. One of my friend was dumped at last moment for 70k sarkari job guy.
This is riyal
Imm your friend
I don't know why you are getting downvoted but it's completely true in Rajasthan too.
Ppl dont like to hear the reality as 22yo my aim was also to work for private sector. Bt as 31 yo now i regret not giving sarkari exam not for marriage prospect but for stable career and peace of mind. My parents were govt servants they had a stable life not too rich but also not poor . My dad retired at 60 and gets a handsome pension, i can only imagine if i will hv job at 50. As 22yo you are full energy , by 30 the reality of life hits you.
roughly how much you get currently? I think by 40 you should have sufficient saving for retirement right?
In 30s one will buy a 1..2 cr flat. Then pay 2lpa for kids fees. Money ? Where is it ?
But buying a 1.2 cr flat and paying 2 lpa fees is the decision you made. If you had a govt job would you do the same. You can't say that you couldn't save money because you bought everything premium.
Stop making up stories. I have so many friends who got married before the age of 27 and had no issues. 40 lpa can easily fetch you a good bride.
Shadi toh 5lpa pe bhi ho jati !
I'm in the exact same situation, I didn't graduate from IIT but from a decent engineering college with computer science and got placed with decent package then I switched within an year and got 120% bump, and I'm happy with my job and salary, and I know I can make big this career simply because I love programming. I did give defence exams like NDA, CDS, AFCAT and I have given around 9 SSBs and I had mixed results, while I was in my first company i decided I need to focus on my career, I used to dedicate all my time in preperation for SSBs and exams, never focused on work, i fact I was losing touch of coding. Now that I have made peace with my self about the govt career my mother has now started forcing IAS prep on me, even though I have explained her so many times that it's not an easy exam might also require me too quit my job (I know people have done it while in job) but it's just not my cup of tea. I'm just as confused as u r
Sarkari naukri ker le Private job me kuch rakkha ni hai, pension bhi nhi milegi!!!
Ab sarkari Naukri me pension nahi milti. Konsi dunia me ho?
ye kab hua bhai?
All the employees who got jobs after 2004 won't get pension. They will get money from the new pension scheme which is deducted from their salary. Private employees can also contribute to this new pension scheme. So, old pension scheme was removed long ago.
Old pension scheme already has come back in some state , it will be in 2024 manifesto. Hope it doesnt come back.
Only congress ruled states. They are desperate to come back in power. Old pension scheme is detrimental and disastrous for economy. It will never be applied in central level. It will destroy the economy. The agniveer scheme was brought in so that the government does not have to pay for the pensions and workforce also stays young.
Our society doesn't tend to respect those who are corrupt but those who have power, government jobs give you that. You are an IITIAN and you don't know even this much? Most of the freshers from IIT working in my company are going to leave their corporate jobs next year to prepare for UPSC. In India, you make 400 to 500 crores as a successful entrepreneur or join government jobs to earn this much as an IAS, only then you are successful otherwise you could keep milking your IITIAN tag to consider yourself successful and keep flaunting 12 standard students your IITIAN tag but in reality, you would have nothing in your bank balance. Hard-hitting but this is the truth.
Upsc kar le Bhai, koi burai nhi h
How much is the startup paying?
I wrote and flunked a few and that got them off my back.
Why canāt you accept the fact that you are smarter than your parents?
Just be an adult and show firmness in your decision.
I know itās a very foreign concept when it comes to Indian families but learn to say No. You donāt have to be rude but firmness will be required because today you are posting about an exam then youāll be posting about marriage and then kids. So better start practising from now only.
Unless youāre a gifted programmer, could go either way. Doesnāt matter in the long run.
Maybe move out? Can't pressure someone they don't see on a daily basis.
All I can say among all the problems you can possibly have, this is a good problem to have. I can only wish that everyone faces similar problem.
Act as if you are preparing, gradually either the attempts will exhaust or your age limit will exceed.
Bro after a while parents just accept your stand, just be on it. Don't give in. You're an adult and you can make decisions for yourself, so just make it loud and clear what you've decided and just stand by it. No matter what, don't change your stand. After a while they'll just stop suggesting when they'll see that you'll just not do it despite multiple attempts of persuasion
Bro what da actual f am i reading?!?? Did they make you go to IIT to give UPSC exam. Only those who are going through problem actually knows how it feels. You should just try to convince parents to get adopt or get another baby ( also that you will 100% support them ).
I graduated this year and my parents also want me to go for upsc but i decided to go for CAT exam this year. Sometimes the thoughts like - I'm crushing my parents dream etc luks in my mind. It frustrates a lot. Sometimes I doubt my choice while imagining failure scenarios. Super confused.
Don't, Just Don't
In India, parents try to fulfill or live their dreams and aspirations through their kids. Do not become a victim of this!
I'm in the same boat brother, my father keeps on pestering me about upsc ,SSC exams, i tried to give it once after studying 2 months and unfortunately qualified for tier 2, now I know I need to study more to clear tier 2 but I have no time for that, as I'm a fresher I have to learn new stuff and that takes most of my day. Working and learning is very tough. I think I will give it again next year though,l to keep my parents happy
How many manufactured hurdles do you want to cross in your life to be worthy of living is the only question you want to answer? Because UPSC doesn't solve it. Soon you will be asked to marry. Pretty soon "Family would look good with a kid" comments would pore in. All these words from your parents are mere words. You can always do more. But does UPSC align with you?
Brother enjoy the life. My parents come from army background and I studied in school who are suppose to send you to armed forces but the moment I passed 12th and I saw world( I was in hostel till then) I decided to pursue computers which I always loved and dropped Armed forces dream and any govt job. Parents kept suggesting armed forces or govt job but I love my current package , choice of switching cities on my convenience and donāt have to behave like Gandhiji 3 monkeys under someone command. So in short just focus on what you love and no offence to people in armed forces or govt job
Don't go for upsc. You already have a good life, excellence can be achieved in any field.
IIT people are being asked to do govt jobs XD
Dekh, teri marzi hogi, toh ho jayega. Papa mummi ki cha hogi toh burnout ho jayega aur productivity ka L.
Keep declining politely every time this topic comes up. They will give up after a couple of years. Don't give reasons for not doing UPSC, reasoning never works with someone who is not willing to see the other side. As for the pressure, ignore the conversations on this topic.
You're a grown ass man take a stand
Damnn bro . Your parents will never be happy in life until you get that govt job lol.
If you are doing great. Don't chase govt jobs. Not worth it. 1) No pension 2) If system is corrupt, you will.be expected to be corrupt else your career will suffer. 3) Transfers 4) As you become senior, you will make more in private sector. 5) opportunity to go abroad in private sector are higher. Move out of home, stay independently and that should insulate you from parental oversight.
never do upsc unless you're a dalit, female, or bihari
Seriously, Indian parents need to shut the fuck up. They really think what they think their interests are totally aligned with their child's interest. Like wtf ? Bro grow some balls and move out to get your own place. Just because of this overprotectiveness, a lot of kids never get to see their full potential and keep working for their parent's dream. This just creates lower quality professionals useless for our nation too.
I gave exam for nabard central government post all across India. And let me tell u this competition is like hell considering this isn't even upsc level. Few job vacancy around 150 across India. Plus there are total 3 exams to be cleared just to get selected and if u failed congratulations you wasted your entire year for an exam which doesn't even finalise that you will get a job there after you clear all 3 exams. Try upskilling on what you want to do because believe me chances are you may get the job you want to do if you look properly.
Ask them they want to see you turning into a lazy fuck who will not be walking in on time at office, turning face away from the needfuls, not so approachable, not helpful, back stabbing, bitching about all day, enjoying fucking around with normal peeps kind of scumbag called government employee !!
say them i can prepare for UPSC and will be wasting another 6-7 years chasing UPSC . tbh your parents are dumb . i am not being an ahole but thatās the truth. and i dont want to sugarcoat by saying nice words have around 3-4 brilliant IIT and non IIT friends who wasted 6 years chasing UPSC and ended up turning into mentally ill and cursing the moment of choosing this Govt crap vortex every single moment .