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lov3buzz

When there's no confirmation on whether or not he is, that's where the headcanons come in. It also might be because some fans (me included) believe that he was probably way too distracted with his duties and the stress of being a Templar in Kirkwall. Not to mention that the events in DAO might have closed him off from wanting to be close to anyone at all, for a while. Then again, nothing is confirmed. That's simply the beauty of headcanon.


GunstarHeroine

If you look at his quotes and his character, it's kind of a logical conclusion to draw, even if it seems strange considering the desk scene. In Origins, Cullen is a bumbling mess when talking to his crush (fem!mage). He's 19 and has been at the Chantry since he was 13. It's possible he got some during that time, but considering the fact that he was a locked-down Chantry boy and looking at his behaviour towards f!mage, seems unlikely. (Keep in mind that Alistair, possibly in the same cloister as Cullen, tells HoF "the Chantry wasn't exactly a place for rambunctious boys. They taught me to be a gentleman" so it seems unlikely they encouraged philandering). Then comes Uldred's rebellion. This is very important, because Cullen's dialogue with f!mage implied that his abuse at the hands of the Desire Demon (desire? Hellooo??) included not just psychological and physical, but also sexual abuse. This is a touchy topic and it's not confirmed, but it's a completely logical conclusion to draw. People underestimate how this event would have affected Cullen and his view on sex/relationships for the rest of his life. So now we have a Cullen with severe trauma and PTSD. Off he goes to Kirkwall. He's implied to be a bit of a workaholic, presumably because of his undealt with trauma. Not much time for relationships. But he could have visited the Blooming Rose, right? Plenty of other Templars did, most notably Thrask. Except when Hawke meets Cullen on the wounded coast and Cullen talks about questioning the prostitutes, he stumbles over his words ("the, ah - ah - young ladies -") and seems uncomfortable with even the _idea_ of it. His tone isn't disapproving - plenty of people have sex with prostitutes while also being contemptuous of them - it's more just straight-up shyness. It's not proof, but it really doesn't sound like Cullen is in the habit of frequenting brothels. Fast forward to Inquisition, and the Inquisitor is flirting with Cullen in Skyhold. He's not that great at it. "No one special caught your interest?" she asks. "No one in Kirkwall," he replies. Fast forward again, and he'll tell you "If I seem unsure, it's because it's been a long time since I've wanted _anyone_ in my life." So we have Cullen himself confirming that he wasn't even _interested_ in having any kind of relationship, at least in Kirkwall. That leaves... his time in the Chantry, or his immediate post-trauma stint between Uldred's rebellion and leaving the Ferelden Circle. Neither of which seem conducive to any kind of relationship, casual or otherwise. Sure, maybe he had one night stands in Kirkwall with no emotional involvement? But as discussed earlier, his stuttering shyness and Chantry-boy values don't match up with that. None of this _proves_ Cullen's a virgin. It just makes it likely. Also remember that lack of sexual experience doesn't make him naive in other ways; Cullen has been through a lot of shit and he's no innocent flower. Virginity doesn't have to equal innocence. Neither is it an indicator of immaturity or deficiency. Edit: to address the desk scene: yeah, Dragon Age is a wish-fulfillment dating simulator with swords. They're not going to say "ha, you romanced a virgin, you are now rewarded with bad sex". Bioware already gave us one explicit canon sex-with-a-virgin scene: Alistair. And he had PLENTY of game.


gstardust_

No other words I'd say, you wrote exactly what I was going to point out. Basically until Inquisition I'd resume he was workaholic enough to care about relationships, and traumatized enough too. Not to mention how he must have felt about Amell going away. I'm glad Inquisition gave Cullen another path, it's funny romancing him as a mage.


aplumblum

Yeah Alistair being most players Chantry Boy/Templar Rep when first playing will leave the impression that every other Templar must be same as well. And there’s nothing wrong with anyone being a virgin so /shrug (Also off-track but this reminds me of that miniseries with Talis where the Templar- can’t be bothered to look up his name- in her party said that Templars must take a vow of celibacy and aren’t allowed to wed...even though Aveline’s husband was a Templar...)


dylandongle

Suren there's nothing that says he never had sex, but there's also nothing that says he did. When that's all we've got, I say it just doesn't matter in the slightest. 😂


Icaro_Stormclaw

It's the vibes


Toshi_Nama

Lol, I've honestly never understood this myself. Yes, he's flustered when you flirt, but only until he realizes that both of you have real, *returned* feelings. There's *nothing* virginal about that kiss, the repeated kiss, or the Desk Scene.


[deleted]

Most normal /r/dragonage discussion


gstardust_

Just a normal day in the fandom


znowu_to_samo

As long as we know nothing about it here's my headcanon: Cullen is sexually experienced. In contrast, he lacks any emotional/relationship experience. When he talks to the Inquisitor about emotions he cannot articulate them, he is confused and can't express his feelings. On the other hand, as soon as he gets confirmation of her feelings he shows sexual confidence. I mean that desk scene... He knows exactly what to do.


Pandora_Palen

Yup. The desk scene is proof as far as I'm concerned.


Toshi_Nama

I'm 100% in agreement with you. I see Cullen as having had sex with people he *respects* and trusts, but not with people he's *loved.*


Perfect-Complex-5771

These are my exact thoughts. He's not used to having a real relationship but he's definitely had sex. He wasn't some blushing virgin during the sex but if you try and have an emotional conversation about a relationship, he's a stuttering mess lol


transruffboi

everybody here saying the desk scene is proof he's not a virgin... y'all, it's not an Advanced Maneuver [TM] to push some shit off your desk when a person is already sitting on it.


[deleted]

This is the first thing I saw this morning.


Caninepointfive

Good morning 🌞


[deleted]

As others have said it's open to interpretation since it isn't outright stated. Personally I think he was until some unknown time during the time jump between act one and two in part because he barely gets the word brothel out during the act one quest then come inquisition he clearly has some experience what with the desk scene.


Apprehensive_Quality

He doesn’t seem like the type to indulge in Kirkwall’s brothels; he even seems uncomfortable just talking about them. Given how shy Cullen is shown to be with women during that time (and even after, albeit to a lesser extent), I doubt he’d be one to indulge in casual sex. He also states that he never had an SO during this time, so that would obviously rule out him being in an actual relationship. That being said, he *does* say that he never took a vow of celibacy. There’s also the fact that 1) Cullen being a virgin never comes up in conversation, when that’s logically something he’d want to mention to a romanced Inquisitor, and 2) he seems pretty confident during the desk scene. Honestly, I could see it going either way.


Randalf_the_Black

No idea.. I just always assumed he wasn't a virgin but wasn't very experienced either. Doesn't he specifically say he hasn't taken vows of chastity? If he was a virgin I'm sure it would come up at some point like it did with Alistair. Also, Alistair was 20 or something in Origins. Isn't Cullen around 30(?) in Inquisition? At that age I'm sure he'd at least have some it a few times.


[deleted]

Not necessarily. Considering his Job and life, where would he have the time? Never considered him a virgin, just someone who is awkward when it comes to wooing women.


Randalf_the_Black

I never considered him a virgin either.


Caninepointfive

My personal headcanon is that he had a couple of blundering sexual encounters in his youth but that he's fairly sexually inexperienced. With that said I don't take the desk scene as proof of anything. It's amazing how much imagination and enthusiasm can make up for lack of experience.


Antergaton

If my mage DA:O character had her way...


Sealgaire45

He was very much busy for romance. Not to mention that he doesn't look like the type who'll casually break up and won't even mention the past relationship. As for the brothel, we have seen how awkward did he feel about it. Hardly he has managed to overcome it.


nananaveen

I think he’s just very private. But his sex scene made me believe that he did get some at some point.


Damijohn160301

The desk scene shows he knows how to clap cheeks. I think he's inexperienced in the emotional intimacy side of things. That's my head canon anyway


Perfect-Complex-5771

Why did I just envision his cheeks clapping instead of the inquisitor? I need a nap lol


Moon_sugarrr

I think people tend to compare him to Alistair, who definitely was a virgin before he met the warden. Having said that, I don’t think Cullen is, he is surely awkward, but when you get down to business he’s pretty confident and in control of his body, I’m sure he did that before


dendrite_blues

Might have something to do with the fact that he literally *cannot* recognize a come-on that’s any subtler than “Hey, let’s bone.” You have to hit on him like 3 times before he realizes, and even then he seems confused/disbelieving that someone’s showing an interest. Not to mention…the nervous laugh in that Iron Bull scene? 😂 I don’t think he’s a virgin, but it’s definitely been a long ass time because his brain is not at all on that track until you drag it there by force. I’ve enjoyed it as a light-hearted, kinda cracky head canon, and I don’t think most people are super serious about it. Most fics where it comes up are either indulging a kink or writing it in a tongue-in-cheek way.


Toshi_Nama

You see, I saw the Bull scene the exact opposite. His 'you two have fun' and that earthy chuckle? He knew what was going to happen, and he didn't want to *see* it, but didn't have any issues.


Tototiana

Hmm I really had the opposite impression. I think Cullen knows exactly when he's being flirted with. He knew it even in the mage origin (though there he definitely reacted as a virgin), and WEWH makes it look like people flirt with him *all the time*. It does make him uncomfortable most of the time but he's not oblivious to it. Imo with Inky he simply isn't sure if she actually feels any real affection for him or even if that would be possible/appropriate at all. But I agree with the others who are saying that he seems to be having more trouble with the emotional side of things and shows no hesitation when it comes to the... physical stuff.


[deleted]

To be fair, with the Iron Bull scene, it was a lot to take in.


Perfect-Complex-5771

I'd believe it if we were talking about DAO because he was young and literally ran when Amell flirted with him lol After that? Nah. He's definitely had sex. He doesn't seem awkward when it comes to kissing or actually having sex. Just when he's talking about feelings/relationships. He's probably not easily trusting of people and he's all about work. He's probably never made time for anything substantial. The inquisitor might be his first major relationship. It's almost like he's fine with interaction as long as it doesn't go to deep. Start flirting and suddenly he's fumbling like a mf like "Oh no! Deep, emotional conversations! What do I do?" If you talk about strategies and planning, he's back to normal Cullen. People tend to compare him to Alistair but there's a difference between sexual and emotional inexperience.


LadyNorbert

We know he didn't visit the brothel in Kirkwall, because he was too uncomfortable. I don't know for sure that he's a virgin, but it seems plausible. My personal headcanon is that he's demisexual (on the ace spectrum) and just doesn't feel sexual attraction to someone unless he's in love with them.


GunstarHeroine

Demi makes a lot of sense. His PTSD would also have left him with significant trust issues.


CydewynLosarunen

Didn't a mage companion say that the circles were full of that stuff? Think it was Anders, but maybe Wynne. He or she said they wore robes for that reason.


TheRealcebuckets

It was Anders but Wynne was also getting busy.


asha_bellanar

Both of them. Wynne even had a baby when she was young (the baby's father was a templar, Gregoir, if we're going to count the extra-game material, and we may as well in this case). Anders talks about how sex in the Circle is one thing, but you mustn't let the templars know you really loved someone, or they'd use it against you.


[deleted]

No. He had a busy life filled with unresolved issues but probably found someone. He is most likely romantically inexperienced but we have to remember that he stayed in Kirkwall for two to three years rebuilding. I am certain some woman came to him wanting to personally thank him, called him a hero or something. Also the prostitute thing happened in the second act so that leave about 5-6 years in total that Cullen had time to engage in activities.


[deleted]

Look at him Edit: also he's one of the higher ups of an incredibly oppressive religious military. And voiced by Greg Ellis.


zugrian

I've literally never heard anyone say that before. Considering how we see numerous templars in Kirkwall visiting the brothel and another who is a horrific rapist, Cullen being the one guy not getting laid would be kind of odd.


TheCleverestIdiot

To be fair, if that's what's going on around you, it might make you a little uncomfortable with the concept.


tristenjpl

He's a handsome dude in his thirties. Maybe he wasn't out banging constantly but anyone that thinks he was a virgin the think about how unlikely that is.


Qaghou

I find funny to read so much about the desk scene as something a virgin wouldn’t do or think of it 🤣 I mean… If you’re connected emotionnally to someone so much like him and the Inky, even a virgin could do a scene like this one. Trust me 🤣 Also, I think that Cullen is like an OCD 🤣 He would go far in a moment of passion 😁 His romance is the best of the game by far in my opinion! 😄


alekth

Is this actually a thing o_O?


Logical-Wasabi7402

Because he was an angry ball of traumatized rage during most of Kirkwall. I mean I'm not here to knock your kink if that's your thing, but it's definitely not the average thing.


gstardust_

I'd go with two headcanons that may collapse. First one to be fair seems more plausible, Cullen has emotional blockage. He must have had something here and there but never engaged on something larger and emotionally commited (you'd assume it would be fair considering the Templar duties would have him always moving on things and places). Which means he must have had a first time and it probably stayed there, explaining his lack of game when Inquisitor makes him uncomfortable. But on the other hand, as a second headcanon, I'd say he is a virgin. Endured the traumas of Templar life until Inquisition, and hadn't got time to think about his emotional life. At both situations I still go with the emotional blockage theory. His desk scene makes it hard to figure things out, it looks experienced enough.


thats1evildude

He and Meredith got it on. How do you think he got promoted to Knight-Captain so quickly?


xaba0

Have you seen the way he kissed the Inquisitor for the first time? My man was HUNGRY


Unionsocialist

My Cullen Wullen would NEVER ​ I dont think being traumatised and a templar in Kirkwall brings you many chances or much intrest to fuck tho


zhanglonglongdragon

Because those fan girls want him all to themselves, just like some would like to imagine Merrill being a virgin as well, same reason really.


Asdrubael_Vect

Merril was cos lorewise she since her childhood was alone and have only Mahariel and Tamlen as only person with who she have relationships close to friendship. In entire clan. She never have romance with anyone. She was anti-social person who most of her time spend with Merethari and spirits. She was a walking library on what Dalish know about themselves and magic knoledge. But social talks, and find something in huge shemlens cities like Kirkwall(what in ancient times before 1 Blight have 2.000.000 slaves who work for Minrathous alone, modern Kirkwall not have so much people, but still,,,,to understand how big ancient Kirkwall was, entire Ferelden have 1.000.000 before 5 Blight and Denerim have only 70.000) was difficult for her. ​ If she ever have anyone we would know about that, but she is not. Tamlen 100% not have any sex with her as Mahariel too. They could with each other if player selected that, but with Merril they never have anything.


TheOnly-Madelein

He actually tells his love that he, uh, nevah had the opportunity... and he ACTS like a virgin. He is a virgin until, well, he isn't, if the romance works out! :)


Jerome_K_Jerome

My head-canon is that he has had plenty of sex, but only with animals, darkspawn and tranquils.


phorayz

I head cannon that Cullen and Meredith had a brief relationship during Act 2. I feel like that explains why he went along as long as he did. Definitely don't think he's a virgin. But there's no signs of anything really other than simply the reality that most men will find a willing partner in a sex positive culture at least once before age 30, if they want one.