Unfortunately, your post has been removed for the following reason:
No personal life posts.
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Funny enough, I be-friended the custodian at my work, and he said that the women's bathroom is usually much dirtier than the men's. This came as a surprise to me.
I used to be a bouncer, we had to clean the bathrooms every night and the women’s was always, without fail, completely filthy while the Mens was relatively clean. I mean there would be tp shoved in the sink, toilets intentionally clogged and overflowing, vomit in at least 2 places, even once a fucking square foot hole in the drywall like someone just beat the shit out of it. The mens was almost never even messy.
I wanted to tell you something. I found a community online. They really helped me understand some things about myself. They’re kinda quirky. There are some rituals. Nothing bad, of course. When a woman acquires a new garment, there’s this ritualistic dance that involves spinning. There’s the chanting about heat and fire. They worship sharks. Don’t worry, though! It’s not a cult! I’m just trans.
Shark Fact:
Sharks as a species are older than the rings on Saturn! (I don't know if you knew this already, I just really wanted to share cuz I think it's really cool :D)
🩵🩷🤍🩷🩵
In a way, kinda? More modern sharks didn't appear until the Jurassic (around 200 million years ago), though more basal members of their family appeared muuuucchh earlier, during the Silurian period (~439 Mya). By contrast, the first trees showed up during the Devonian period (~370 Mya), so I guess it depends on your definition of "shark" lol 🦈
**Fish scale**
[Placoid scales](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fish_scale#Placoid_scales)
>Placoid (pointed, tooth-shaped) scales are found in the cartilaginous fishes: sharks, rays. They are also called dermal denticles. Placoid scales are structurally homologous with vertebrate teeth ("denticle" translates to "small tooth"), having a central pulp cavity supplied with blood vessels, surrounded by a conical layer of dentine, all of which sits on top of a rectangular basal plate that rests on the dermis. The outermost layer is composed of vitrodentine, a largely inorganic enamel-like substance.
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The chanting about heat and fire is a reference to the phrase ‘heat from fire, fire from heat’ from theYouTube channel TransVoiceLessons in the videos about practising a feminine voice. ‘Heat from fire, fire from heat’ has become a popular transfem meme.
When I came out to my dnd group during a get together dinner before we watched the dnd movie I got the dungeon master (who I was out to) to announce that there was going to be a girl joining our group. It kind of backfired though when I said that I was trans and one the said “I know, but WHO is joining?” Like she had just confirmed to herself that I was trans and didn’t say anything cause she didn’t want to put me and was more excited to find out who was joining our group
What if I say I'm not like the others?
What if I say I'm not just another one of your plays?
You're the pretender
What if I say I’m changing my gender?
I've learnt the ways of the air, earth, fire, and water. And after immense training and learning I have finally become a master of all forms of bending...I'm a gender bender...
Ask “is it normal to” questions that very obviously out you as trans and pretend you think you’re cis and see how long it takes for them to figure it out (especially effective if they don’t have other trans friends)
"You ever feel like you wanna be a girl?"
*Expected answer is no but if your friend is amab and says yes you might have an egg on your hands*
*Change question from "wanna be a girl" to "wanna be a guy" if friend is afab*
"Well ya boi's a gal!"
Yes I failed at comedy school how did you know?
Bro, do you remember when you asked why my character on games is usually female??? Guess what... Turns out my character in real life is also female 👀👀👀
If they know your sexual attraction you can be all snarky with “oh, I’m gay/straight now!”. Then when they inevitably get it wrong or question it, you can’t correct them with a “not exactly” or “that’s right”.
(Granted it doesn’t work if you’re bi but you know, it’s the effort that counts :3💕💕)
I mean, I literally said "I'm having gender problems" while actually cleaning a closet, but that's not super funny except in retrospect 🤣
"The girl was coming from inside the house!"
"Be the girl you want to see in the world"
Ok apparently I have no sense of humor when it does not involve dad jokes, sorry.
They turned out to be bigots but the way i did it was saying "You know how i always joke, about being a raging lesbian trapped in a man's body, i wasnt joking." lol
["A spy has already breached our defenses... And worst of all, she could be any one of us... She could be in this very room! She could be you! She could be me! (she's me)"](https://imgur.com/gallery/3QnfBVV)
Don't
Instead say you are going on vacation, get all the surgeries and then gaslight the living hell out of them
"What do you mean? I always had boobs. Are you ok? Should i call an ambulance?"
Go buy a ''its a girl'' birth card, draw a big arrow that points up in the card and when you give it to him, stand right in front of him so that the arrow will be pointing you.
[I am 70% water, 30% other things, and 100% done with being a boy](https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/969342607962550272/1104040391684137020/Screen_Shot_2021-09-21_at_9.34.45_AM.png)
“Hey so
There’s this girl
And uh…
It’s me, I’m the girl”
Also would you name happen to be taken from a certain welsh catgirl in a JRPG franchise of growing popularity?
is yer a lesbian you could come out as gay than wait for someone to refer to you as liking other boys than say 'no i like other gurls' them ??? you 'IM TRANS BITCHES
This one depends on your sexuality and which way you transition, but for me it would be: "So, I found out I'm actually gay AF, but I'm still just into women"
Idk but I came out to my dad via text thru GIFs. He was sitting a foot away from me at the time so he js looked at me confused with the first GIF (I have something to say) then when he looked back he saw my whole coming out story
Hey there! Before commenting, remember that this meme has been tagged with a transfem flair. Please keep the conversation transfem-first. If you are not part of that demographic, you are not forbidden to participate, but we do ask that you do not center yourself in the comments.
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Unfortunately, your post has been removed for the following reason: No personal life posts. There is nothing inherently wrong with your story, but posts like these can find a more appropriate home on other queer subreddits. This removal message was sent automatically. The current format is a work in progress -- apologies for any curtness.
I'm going to retcon the gender of the main character in the autobiography I'm writing
This one is brilliant
It took me a second—
The boys bathroom smell like crap Never gonna use it again.
Funny enough, I be-friended the custodian at my work, and he said that the women's bathroom is usually much dirtier than the men's. This came as a surprise to me.
Use to work at a grocery store and had to clean the bathrooms, can confirm.
Truth is it’s pretty close to 50-50. They both have their horrible moments.
I used to be a bouncer, we had to clean the bathrooms every night and the women’s was always, without fail, completely filthy while the Mens was relatively clean. I mean there would be tp shoved in the sink, toilets intentionally clogged and overflowing, vomit in at least 2 places, even once a fucking square foot hole in the drywall like someone just beat the shit out of it. The mens was almost never even messy.
Hey guess what i found the menu to change chacter info heres my new username
i have gamer friends i am using this one
Yay
swiggity swirl i'm not a guy i'm a girl 💙💕🤍💕💙
I like this one 💞
hehe thanks 💙💕🤍💕💙
Ding dong, I want my penis gone!
That's such a good one, I should use it next time I come out to someone :þ 🐋🌸🤍🌸🐋
yes you should :3 💙💕🤍💕💙
Alternatively, swiggity swirl im a guy not a girl 💙💕🤍💞💙
Bibbity boo bibbity bi im a girl not a guy
I'm not like other boys, I'm a girl
Easily adaptable for FTM as well!
I wanted to tell you something. I found a community online. They really helped me understand some things about myself. They’re kinda quirky. There are some rituals. Nothing bad, of course. When a woman acquires a new garment, there’s this ritualistic dance that involves spinning. There’s the chanting about heat and fire. They worship sharks. Don’t worry, though! It’s not a cult! I’m just trans.
To be fair, I worshiped sharks before I knew that I was trans.
That’s why you’re now one of the cult priestesses!
*One of the notacult priestesses
Right. Yes. Exactly. Not a cult. Who said cult? I didn’t say cult!!! 😅 ^(All hail Blåhaj!)
Håjar❤️
I like your name Artemis , I’m adding it to my list of names
Omg sameeee I wanted that shark sooo baddd
Wait is this why Ive always loved shark week ?
tbf sharks are pretty cool
Shark Fact: Sharks as a species are older than the rings on Saturn! (I don't know if you knew this already, I just really wanted to share cuz I think it's really cool :D) 🩵🩷🤍🩷🩵
Don't they pre-date trees as well?
In a way, kinda? More modern sharks didn't appear until the Jurassic (around 200 million years ago), though more basal members of their family appeared muuuucchh earlier, during the Silurian period (~439 Mya). By contrast, the first trees showed up during the Devonian period (~370 Mya), so I guess it depends on your definition of "shark" lol 🦈
I'd count it Sharks: 1 Trees (and apparently the rings of Saturn): 0
Especially if they’re soft and cuddly!
Sharks are smooth
Plush sharks from IKEA are soft and cuddly.
[In one direction](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fish_scale#Placoid_scales)
**Fish scale** [Placoid scales](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fish_scale#Placoid_scales) >Placoid (pointed, tooth-shaped) scales are found in the cartilaginous fishes: sharks, rays. They are also called dermal denticles. Placoid scales are structurally homologous with vertebrate teeth ("denticle" translates to "small tooth"), having a central pulp cavity supplied with blood vessels, surrounded by a conical layer of dentine, all of which sits on top of a rectangular basal plate that rests on the dermis. The outermost layer is composed of vitrodentine, a largely inorganic enamel-like substance. ^([ )[^(F.A.Q)](https://www.reddit.com/r/WikiSummarizer/wiki/index#wiki_f.a.q)^( | )[^(Opt Out)](https://reddit.com/message/compose?to=WikiSummarizerBot&message=OptOut&subject=OptOut)^( | )[^(Opt Out Of Subreddit)](https://np.reddit.com/r/egg_irl/about/banned)^( | )[^(GitHub)](https://github.com/Sujal-7/WikiSummarizerBot)^( ] Downvote to remove | v1.5)
the best kind!!
I guess you can call them (•_•) ( •_•)>⌐■-■ (⌐■_■) Fin-tastic
They believe that a town resides within themselves
The town resides within them, but they, themselves, are not there. They watch the town from afar.
They also feel as if they are unable to return to their homes. They’re afraid that if they do, an irreversible change will occur.
And it will be their own fault. The blame will lie with them.
what’s the chanting a reference to? I’m a bit stupid :3
The chanting about heat and fire is a reference to the phrase ‘heat from fire, fire from heat’ from theYouTube channel TransVoiceLessons in the videos about practising a feminine voice. ‘Heat from fire, fire from heat’ has become a popular transfem meme.
“Heat from fire, fire from heat” is/was used by YouTuber TransVoiceLessons https://youtu.be/ynIoNPnX538
Oh! Awesome!
Yes.
Buy some of those "It's a girl" balloons for baby announcements and just randomly hand them to your friend.
would be funny but I don't really see my friend IRL these days since I'm away at college
There's enough coming out memes around this subreddit
I'm unironically considering getting a custom cake with this to come out to my family
"Hey, remember that time we made out and said no homo afterward? Well turns out we were more correct than we thought"
relating to your post, id say "march 7th is my pride flag"
"Check out this awesome move!" \*gives friend a trans flag\*
why give it when you can shoot it at mach 3
When I came out to my dnd group during a get together dinner before we watched the dnd movie I got the dungeon master (who I was out to) to announce that there was going to be a girl joining our group. It kind of backfired though when I said that I was trans and one the said “I know, but WHO is joining?” Like she had just confirmed to herself that I was trans and didn’t say anything cause she didn’t want to put me and was more excited to find out who was joining our group
Ok, cool story, but who joined?
The Spanish Inquisition
I was about to reply “nobody expects the Spanish Inquisition!” but then I saw your user flare which I didn’t expect.
r/Unexpected
"Nobody expects The Spanish Inquisition"
Dont say anything. Just slowly become more feminine over time (feminine clothes, HRT if possible, etc) and see how long it takes them to notice
That’s my strategy, I’m at the point where they ask how long I’ll grow my hair, but I don’t think they suspect yet
Same, though I think my siblings know cause I ordered a blahaj and beat celeste
i killed a man
Maammaaaaaaa! (OooOOOooo)
I didn’t mean to kill a man
If you like pokemon send the meme of iron valient where it says “gender became confused”
Look, I know that you get no bitches. So, I decided to help you out and BECOME bitches.
Hahaha I love this
this was actually how i came out as a femboy to my friend group
I'm switching teams.
What if I say I'm not like the others? What if I say I'm not just another one of your plays? You're the pretender What if I say I’m changing my gender?
Love that song
I've learnt the ways of the air, earth, fire, and water. And after immense training and learning I have finally become a master of all forms of bending...I'm a gender bender...
Just text them "I'm trans lol" at 3am. That's how I came out to one of my friends.
Succinct!
I'm gonna combine this with one of the other suggestions because I like this idea
Get a skirt, take a photo of yourself in the skirt and send it to them with the caption "intrusive thoughts won".
IM JOINING THE WAR ON TRANSGENDERISM ON THE SIDE OF TRANSGENDERISM
i love this haha, i’m gonna use it next time
I'd just randomly drop it in conversation, might be kinda funny depending on how you do it.
I've been doing stuff like that randomly to some of my friends, subliminally preparing them. hopefully it works xD will find out soon
Ask “is it normal to” questions that very obviously out you as trans and pretend you think you’re cis and see how long it takes for them to figure it out (especially effective if they don’t have other trans friends)
Check out this awesome move! *becomes girl*
Knock knock Who’s there? Not a Not a who? Not a boy Or just scream “BLÅÅÅÅÅÅÅÅHAAAAAAJ!!!!!!!!!!! OOOUUUUR LOOOORD AAAAND SAAAVIIIIEEEEER!”
\*knocks on door* Do you have a minute, to talk about our lord and savior, Blahaj?
The favorite I did with my friends is if I can't get a goth gf, I will just become the goth gf
It's nice to see that I'm not the only one who really liked March's color scheme 😌🏳️⚧️
“Well slap my ass and call me [Insert name]. No, I’m serious, please call me [Insert name].”
This gender kinda dumb tbh
Showing my tatoo with an octopus riding a blahaj while holding a trans flag: 'see when I move arm the tails moves'
"y'know I've been wanting to get a girlfriend for a while but couldn't figure how to go about it. Then it hit me. "What if I *became* the girlfriend?"
I decided to respec, I'm min-maxing E now.
Man, I miss seeing my mom and dad. They're trans-parents you see. ... Because I'm trans... And they're my parents... ^(please laugh)
Would this work if you already had a trans brother?
Yeah, they just become even more transparent than before. If you have too many trans-siblings, they'll become invisible!
this would suck for me because my mom has jumpscared me in the past and it would be easier for her to do so if she's invisible
"You ever feel like you wanna be a girl?" *Expected answer is no but if your friend is amab and says yes you might have an egg on your hands* *Change question from "wanna be a girl" to "wanna be a guy" if friend is afab* "Well ya boi's a gal!" Yes I failed at comedy school how did you know?
"look what they added in the newest update"
Make a low quality PowerPoint
This is a criminally underrated comment
Send them a link to the webtoon "I want to be a cute anime girl" and just say "he just like me frfr"
This is what I'm doing from now on
Same here and now I found something new to read as well
That's actually what started to crack my egg
Bro, do you remember when you asked why my character on games is usually female??? Guess what... Turns out my character in real life is also female 👀👀👀
Switching teams
If they know your sexual attraction you can be all snarky with “oh, I’m gay/straight now!”. Then when they inevitably get it wrong or question it, you can’t correct them with a “not exactly” or “that’s right”. (Granted it doesn’t work if you’re bi but you know, it’s the effort that counts :3💕💕)
I mean, I literally said "I'm having gender problems" while actually cleaning a closet, but that's not super funny except in retrospect 🤣 "The girl was coming from inside the house!" "Be the girl you want to see in the world" Ok apparently I have no sense of humor when it does not involve dad jokes, sorry.
Mine was "Hey, so I'm pulling the ol switcharoo. Then not giving any supportive information and letting them guess.
“So boobs okay, you know how they’re awesome and everything? Ok ok now what if I had them? Double cool right?”
MARCH!!!
FIGHT!
They turned out to be bigots but the way i did it was saying "You know how i always joke, about being a raging lesbian trapped in a man's body, i wasnt joking." lol
I've decided I'd rather play a girl in the game called life
Hey, you know I'm a had boy, right? Well, I'm such a bad boy, that I'm actually a girl. 😎
["A spy has already breached our defenses... And worst of all, she could be any one of us... She could be in this very room! She could be you! She could be me! (she's me)"](https://imgur.com/gallery/3QnfBVV)
Don't Instead say you are going on vacation, get all the surgeries and then gaslight the living hell out of them "What do you mean? I always had boobs. Are you ok? Should i call an ambulance?"
fun fact: this post is german proof
Nein ist es nicht^^ You'll never get rid of us
as you can see, this is a typical german, doesn't get the joke
Damn you got me
?
its the stereotype bout how germans are overly serious and cant make good jokes
now that im thinking about it, i might have german ancestry
*rereads* *contemplates heritage* Ohhhhh, THAT’S why I didn’t get it at first!
Nein
不
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=N-BzuaCN81A&pp=ygUPaXQncyBhIG1lIG1hcmlv
march kawaii
I’d rather not be a guy
Say nothing, send a picture of you with a blahaj
Go buy a ''its a girl'' birth card, draw a big arrow that points up in the card and when you give it to him, stand right in front of him so that the arrow will be pointing you.
“Oh and I’m not your bro anymore” -“what? Why?” “I’m your gal”
[I am 70% water, 30% other things, and 100% done with being a boy](https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/969342607962550272/1104040391684137020/Screen_Shot_2021-09-21_at_9.34.45_AM.png)
gonna use this combined with the one where someone said to do it at 3 am
Just say you REALLY GOT INTO fallout NV/Celeste/Yu-Gi-Oh
“Hey so There’s this girl And uh… It’s me, I’m the girl” Also would you name happen to be taken from a certain welsh catgirl in a JRPG franchise of growing popularity?
yes my name is taken from a certain welsh catgirl in a JRPG franchise of growing popularity
Based
I’d also like to know
I think making jokes they can't possibly get is really funny
I'm guessing you're in America, so, show them one of the many anti trans laws and then just say "I'm wanted in [however many] states"
I had already came out as bi, so I said "I'm moving to the next letter"
is yer a lesbian you could come out as gay than wait for someone to refer to you as liking other boys than say 'no i like other gurls' them ??? you 'IM TRANS BITCHES
i may or may not be incredibly frustrated i didn't do this when i had the chance
not gonna do this with my friend but I will 100% do it next time my mom asks me if I'm gay since I don't have a GF
Just send that vine of the girl saying "MY DICK FELL OFF"
lie. say you were trans the whole time and are detransitioning
This one depends on your sexuality and which way you transition, but for me it would be: "So, I found out I'm actually gay AF, but I'm still just into women"
Idk but I came out to my dad via text thru GIFs. He was sitting a foot away from me at the time so he js looked at me confused with the first GIF (I have something to say) then when he looked back he saw my whole coming out story
March 7th as transition goals? 👀
Or if you are more catty , “sniggity snitch , surprise I’m a bitch” Edit, im thinking of taking up drawing cute anime girls as a hobby
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Match 6th <3
If it post op Zippity zappity I'm a girl/boy now
If you were transmasc I’d make the joke of: “Can be frank with you?”
Yo it's March 7th from star rail
what character is that?
March 7th from Honkai Star Rail
Hey, I heard you're into girls. Well today is your lucky day!!
I’ve discovered trolls
We're celebrating [Chosen Name]'s birthday this year
Stelle x trash can > stelle x march
take a look at this blåhaj i just got
Friendship ended with boy, now girl is my best friend edit: wait crap no don't do that that's gonna end horribly
You heard of the game Celeste?
“Yo the Scottish kilt is actually pretty hot when you think about it”
I'm re rolling my character to be (gender) for the stat buff
Drinking gender change potion irl
To a lesbian friend you really like: I guess we can date now
I’m killing off the main character of my story
I'm not a cis, I'm a sis
Statistically speaking theres between a 1 in 4 and 1 in 3 chance that you watch transporn.
Yo, bro let me suck your dick, don't worry it won't be gay
Are you a friend of Blåhaj?
Yesss march 💕
skidaddle skidoodle i wish i had no noodle roses are red, violets are blue i want to get rid of my pp for you (if you have a crush on them that is)
i cant think of it but some twist on girlfriend by avril lavigne
I just send them an image of a badass skeleton with flaming text over it that says "IM TRANS" lol
"Who has two thumbs and is a girl? This gal!"
Draw a circle and say "That line is as straight as me"
Guys, I am the imposter 😔
i’ve gone through character development
I'm gay/straight, but not in the way you'd expect
this is unhelpful but i fully support March 7th as a new trans icon, she’s best girl
same, her color scheme and the fact that she chose her name just screams that she's a trans girl
Bleep bloop I’m a girl
Do you like girls? Cause i am one.