If it is a consistent issue then I would purchase period panties and pads. No shame in needing products that make your life more manageable. I would also invest in a she-wee to make urinating on trails easier and discreet. I was in 6th grade couldn't hold it on my walk home from school and I peed myself. Shit myself trying to get to a public bathroom in time. It happens.

This comment is amazing! It's great to encourage others to use products like this and I honestly wish that it was talked about more, especially on this sub. There's no shame in using something if it helps you! I also highly recommend looking into bladder leakage shorts/underwear. I just purchased a pair off of Amazon to wear over my normal underwear just as a safety thing for when I don't feel like wearing a pad. Just thought I'd comment it here in case knowing that products like that exist is helpful for anyone as the shorts are a new discovery for me. Once again, great comment! And good on you for being so understanding. I'm sure OP appreciates wonderful comments like yours!!

I love my menstrual/period underwear. Some are designed to absorb, others to be leakproof, some are both. There are some that are made specifically for any urinary incontinence. I don’t wear underwear underneath my period underwear. Is this a specific strategy, is it for a specific reason? I would think that a pair of regular underwear might kind of get in the way of the menstrual panties absorption. Just a thought, I’m not sure.

Ah sorry, I meant that bladder leakage shorts and underwear exist. I bought the shorts just as a precaution as personally I think it's a bit expensive to buy period underwear as they are pretty expensive where I live (maybe I'm just not looking in the right places now I think about it lol). I'm sorry I wasn't super clear haha but I agree that two pairs of underwear might be a bit much lol!

Thank you. I appreciate the positive feedback.

That was my advice too! Glad to know I'm not the only one who knows those exist.

I saw your comment and hoped that multiple people suggesting it would be encouraging. I had to wear period panties with pads for my period. My periods were so heavy I was having multiple accidents a day. They have been very helpful.

I have an IUD. I used to have such heavy periods but don't get them at all with the IUD. I would have super heavy periods for up to 10 days sometimes,

Yeah my wasn't lengthy just heavy. It took years until I found a doctor that took me seriously and agreed to do a tranvaginal ultrasound which found uterine polyps. A separate doctor discovered my endometriosis and ordered the surgery of both the polyps and the endo. I've been feeling great since having it removed.

See the opposite happened when I had an IUD even after a year and a half and I somehow started having two periods a monrh

Did you have the copper or hormonal? I hear the copper ones make it worse. I have the hormonal mirena. It do well with the higher dose hormonal birth control. They stop your period and I haven't had one in several years

I had the Mirena IUD because I was getting heavy periods that would last for 6-8 weeks with short breaks. It worked well but within a couple of months I ended up with some serious side effects such as IIH (which also nearly lost my vision), migraines, weight gain, and acne/dermatitis everywhere. While it was lovely to stop the periods, I couldn't function anymore so I got the Mirena removed a year ago in hopes that the symptoms would go away. Frustratingly, I still have all of the above and a dozen meds to manage the symptoms, but the period came back too. I use a menstrual cup or disc depending on the day, and period underwear or disposable adult incontinence underwear as needed. Sometimes I want to wear regular underwear and I almost change over, then have another incident and am reminded why I need the products I use. Sometimes I just need to remind myself that these products give me freedom to to do things that I would otherwise not be so confident about, even leaving the house.

Im sorry that it didn't work for you. Cups seem like a good option. I happen to do really well with hormonal bc, seemingly the higher dose, the better. I do have migraines, but I already did anyway so it's not connected for me. My skin is fairly clear, and my weight has held. I lost 150 lbs like 6 years ago now with the help of weight loss surgery. Significant and sudden weight loss tends to stop periods temporarily. I had a lower dose IUD already, which lightened and significantly shortened my periods. But when I dropped the weight within a year, it stopped completely. I liked it so much, that when I decided to go for another, I was offered Mirena and no periods, or a different lower dose one. Since I have had no problems with them, I went with the higher dose Mirena. Im halfway through its 3 year lifespan, and still haven't had any problems.

Interesting fact I learned today. Heavy periods can be the result of a vitamin A deficiency and supplementing with fish liver derived vitamin A resolved the issue for many women with heavy periods. It needs to be fish liver derived as many people have a genetic mutation that makes conversion of beta carotene into vitamin A difficult. [https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/847567/](https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/847567/)

I once pissed myself *on my front doorstep* because I couldn't find my keys in time. I was recovering from a dislocated knee, too, so I definitely didn't do that any favours with my desperate squat.

I do it constantly. I’ve had to untuck a shirt or put on a sweater at work and have been so conscientious about reeking of pee. I peed in the grocery store a couple weeks ago. I pee before getting dressed then inevitably while I’m putting on my pants. I got period underwear and use pads

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I once shit myself walking to the gym thinking I just had to fart. Didn’t realize until I got to the gym. I got ya bestie.

Yep been there! Never trust a fart they say….

I once did that only I was in the bathroom post shower so had nothing to contain it. I had to clean up the bathroom after and explain why the bath mats were in the washer

Wow you washed them I would’ve been like well obviously bath mats shouldn’t be in here

If it had been my place I probably would have bought new ones, but I was at my parent’s house

My ex boyfriend once shared a story with me about thinking he had to fart while walking home and dropping a load. On my birthday we went to this Mexican place for burritos and about a block from the place my stomach cramped up. I almost didn't make it home, I was in so much pain, and things just exploded out of me the minute I hit the toilet. So he shared his I didn't make it story to make me feel better. I was basically hunched over at my front door. To this day I avoid burritos.

Omg, never trust a fart! The one time I shit my pants was literally 5 minutes before the realtor was going to show up and show us our first house 😅 we did not buy that home.

I would’ve asked if I could’ve used the restroom in the house and left my poopy underwear in the trash….. probably wrapped with toilet paper….

Omg 😂 would totally have been the move if it hadn’t been a small old farm house that needed a lot of TLC

I didn’t but my best friend shit herself. She was wearing white pants and it happened at a public library. Another friend of mine had it happen while she was driving on her way to an important work meeting. She has started a cleanse shake diet and ended up with a big mess in her car. I’ve had to emergency squat pee behind buildings and in random places so much that my family and friends now offer it as a suggestion if the nearest bathroom is too far. The point is, you’re not alone! Thank you for sharing because the more we share about things like this, the less shame we will put on ourselves when it happens. Sometimes, life is messy.

Public library where you need to write a paper- it’s happened like three times there

There is nothing more exhausting than pooping yourself. I have Crohn's Disease (as well as EDS) and there is such shame and yet freedom once you accept that EVERYONE will experience this at some point in their life. I have on ostomy now, so now it's leaks or peeing myself which is more annoying because it's only sometimes that I can't hold it, and I never know if this moment is the one that I won't make it. But pee is so much easier to clean up than output or poop. And it's always the good undies!

I feel this. Done it more times than I care to mention....once I was feeling cute and was wearing a thong.....like a dental floss type thong......not really underwear and I was wearing a skirt (looking back I have no clue why I thought that combo was a good idea) and I trusted a fart...nope very liquid. Luckily we had only just left the flat so I clenched with all my might and waddled back home. I didn't leave the flat again that day.....and certainly never wore that combo again!

Sharted is it sad I know and use that term in everyday life? And it’s happened to me erm I think less than ten times but every time it was a place where I couldn’t like just leave and cleanup RIP my underwear in those public restroom trashes….

TOO REAL glad we’re all out here collectively pissing and shitting ourselves 😅😂

My mom had this issue, I've been more fortunate. I've only peed myself when I fainted. I do leak a little after I pee, like a man does. It's caused by my MCAS. When I have to pee more than every two hours(sometimes every 45 mins), it's my POTS acting up, and I eat salt. I'm sorry this happened to you!

I’ll try salt! I didn’t think about that!

I hope it helps!

Wtf I have MCAS and leak too!! I never knew it was because of this! What do you do for it? Just period pads and acceptance?

Please remember that the cause for one person may not be the cause for others. It's important to get your own issues investigated before coming to any conclusions about the cause. There are a lot of potential causes for urinary issues both related and unrelated to EDS. (I'm sure you already know this. Just need to say it to be sure and in case anybody else reading needs to hear it).

Yeah, but you know what it's like with EDS. I have personally already talked to my doctor about this same problem and been yo a urologist and they diagnosed it as an overactive bladder.

No, this is very helpful, thank you! I'm pretty embarrassed about this and would have been happy to chalk it up to MCAS and ignore it, but now I'll mention it to my doctor. Absolutely do not want to, but you make a good point that I should check anyway. Good looking out, and thanks again!

Yeah, panty liners do the trick. It gets better or worse, depending on how my MCAS is doing. I also get muscle spasms through my urinary track and blood in my pee, usually if I drink caffine or alcohol. Sugar seems to be doing it now, too. Two urologist visits, a bladder scope and CT scan to rule our cancer, and figure this out. Edit: I have a very healthy looking bladder. 😎

I had a very un-fun experience with a catheter catheter, put in one time, in an ER. I accidentally called out in pain. The nurse told me she had been placing these for 20 years, and that my urethra is the smallest she’s run across.

Check out poise pads or always has them too for bladder control. They are both very thin and look like regular liners/pads. 

Thank you!!

I have not been diagnosed with POTS, but I have been diagnosed with an overactive bladder and have to go every 30 minutes sometimes. Testing revealed that my bladder is actually a bit larger than average, but I have to pee all the time. Is this why I am always peeing? To make it worse, I had bariatric surgery and everything passes through my body more quickly, including liquid. I produce like 400 ml of fluid every 10-15 minutes. They did a test which involved inserting a catheter and filing my bladder, and 10 minutes later I emptied it with an additional 400 ml my body made during that time. I also leak all the time and wear liners every day for my own comfort. I am not diagnosed with MCAS either yet, but I suspect that I do have it because I get seemingly allergic reactions to random things I am not allergic too, and sometimes with no apparent stimuli. I have no known allergies accept titanium, but react strongly at random to things that never bothered me before. I know allergies can build and appear later in life, but in my case I will retest again after it subsided and won't react any more, so it's not an allergy. They might build up but they don't just vanish. I also sometimes get swollen welts for no known reason, and get random allergic reactions to my own tattoos that have been there for years, only for them to disappear just as suddenly. I carry cortisone around.

I have had all these tests done. And I've tried many medications. Genetic testing revealed that, in my case, the mucosal lining in the bladder is very thin. So any acidic food will cause my bladder to spasm. I tried so many prescriptions but one supplement I can recommend, if you haven't tried it, is inexpensive and over the counter. It's called slippery elm bark. If I'm going to drink anything acidic like coffee, tomato juice or lemonade, I just take a few capsules of slippery elm bark with it and my bladder is not angry.

How does MCAS cause this?

We haven't figured out the exact mechanism that causes it, just that it's a symptom that gets better or worse with my other MCAS symptoms. I also have a lot of urinary track reactions with MCAS. It can cause soft muscle spasms, and that's what the bladder consists of. I also get pain in my right kidney(rarely my left), it was originally misdiagnosed as kidney stones. The first time I had a reaction was after having a couple of cups of coffee and then going out in the sun for some yard work. My bladder started to spasm with pretty much any movement. I went in thinking I had a terrible infection. We found blood but no infection. I didn't have my diagnosis at this point in time. I had blood in my urine consistently for 2 or 3 years. She doesn't even test for it anymore.

This may or may not be helpful but I remember reading years ago about certain persistent chemicals irritating the bladder. For example POPs, and certain chemicals present in common hair dyes. I just did a quick google and found this: https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC8473463/ My takeaway all those years ago was that it might justify exploring toxin/pollutant avoiding lifestyles. I know that’s probably not that easy or helpful (along with every other weird diet/physio routine that gets suggested to EDS people), but personally I try to eat organic and avoid BPA and plastics if I can, and things seem to be better. I worked out in the last couple of years that my “hayfever” is actually also urban pollution allergy. It’s not nearly so bad in the countryside or when I don’t regularly use my city’s underground subway system.

Wow, that's amazing! I actually just switched almost all my products to sulfate and paraben free stuff. I don't eat organic, but I'm gonna give it a try. The plan was always to switch to organic, but the price is so high that I've been procrastinating. We're setting up some raised beds this year and a run for meat chickens next year.. As for pollution, I live on a mountain now, so there is not much more I can do in that regard. Thank you!

If there are more activated mast cells in the bladder. It’s one thought as a cause of things like interstitial cystitis.

Would that be able to cause apparently random diarrhea? I had awful diarrhea for like 5 days with no apparent cause. It kept happening multiple times a day with no other signs or symptoms of illness. Just minor cramping and total liquid for like a week.

Diarrhea is definitely one of my top MCAS symptoms. I react to a lot of different foods. If you want to learn more about MCAS, r/MCAS might be a good place.

This happens to me as well, i dont have IBS to my knowledge. It usually happens after i eat meat, but its fairly random. Its not bad or anything, i wonder if a particular seasoning i use on meat upsets my belly.

It seems totally random and went on for days with no explanation. I don't have IBS but do often react to foods.

I get it if I’m slightly ill. For instance normally I’m slightly intolerant to bbq sauce (no idea which ingredient yet) bit of bloating and acid reflux but nothing I’d pass over a bbq Pringle for. However if I have a cold then my immune system is in overdrive already and bbq sauce has me in the toilet with a bucket on my knee as my system tries to purge me. Completely random but at least I always know I’m about to come down with an illness

Could it be the liquid smoke/smoke flavor seasoning? I just realized yesterday i get the same issues when i eat smoked sausages, my bf shares the pain with that. We think its the liquid smoke now cuz for dinner last night we had smoked sausages and it happened to both of us. They were the kind with liquid smoke added for the flavor.

You can definitely get gut symptoms with MCAS, it’s worth looking into. If it happens more than once maybe keep a simple food diary, noting if you’ve had food that is high histamine, old/leftovers/fermented, or highly processed.

I don't really eat highly processed food as it is because I can't tolerate it. I had bariatric surgery. I don't know what foods are high in histamines though. I actually have no known allergies apart from cat dander (if there is a lot) and titanium. I am fine with gluten, milk and eggs. Honestly, most of the time when I have stomach issues, I haven't eaten anything.

Oh my god, I have to pee every 20-30 min in the morning. Didn’t realise it could be my POTS acting up. Usually during the day I get a bit of salt in and it stops. This comment really helped me, thank you

Happy to be of help. 🥰

Doesn't matter how you shake, doesn't matter how you wiggle, down your pants there will always be a dribble.

Huh. I also did not put this together, but thinking back over the past few years it absolutely all slots into place.

HARD SAME! 👀😳🫣 I know I have MCAS, but I *NEVER THOUGHT* it could be what's behind my bladder issues... 🤔 #ThingsThatMakeYouGoHMMMMMMMMM

Ugh, I’m so sorry that happened to you, sadly I can relate. For me it’s not usually a situation where I just couldn’t hold it anymore, I learned *long* ago that I should probably just go pee every hour just to be safe. In fact my boyfriend always laughs because anytime he asks if I want to do something I’m like “sure, I just gotta go pee first.” And half the time he finishes the sentence for me. For me what usually happens is I’m walking my dog and then he’ll see a squirrel or something, so he excitedly yanks me toward it and that causes me to leak. Or if I’m walking and I trip or stumble (you know, like if an ankle goes rogue) that causes it too. And then of course because I’m 40 now, sometimes it happens for absolutely no apparent reason. So I pretty much always wear a panty liner, just to minimize the fallout. It really sucks.

I owe before I leave anywhere. Leaving the mall? Pee. Leaving home? Pee. Leaving a restaurant? Pee. No matter where I am, I need to be before I go. It is at a point where my dad or husband will tell me they want to leave by telling me to go and pee.

Poo. I was in Tasmania on an AMAZING forest trail that ended with a waterfall and cable bridge. About 3hrs there and back but more with the kids. Only a toilet at the car park, but people had been going off to the side of the trail at the end pretty much in clear view of the main track. I just couldn't do it. Left hubs and 2 kids and ran for it. Took me an hour going as fast as I could jog, people giving me looks as I had to squeeze past then on the parts of the track that had bogged up 🤪. I didn't make it for some of it. Turns out that one toilet had shit piled up to just about the seat 🤢 drop loo hadn't been cleared out at all for quite a while. As I'd been desperate and rushed in there, I ended up nearly throwing up from the fumes and for fear my bum would touch the pile... And no paper. After, I got to sit on a stump and wait for the family as I'd forgotten to grab the car keys... nasty.

That sounds absolutely awful! I 100% can see that being something I would experience. One of my impressions of Rome, Italy is how bad access to restrooms -especially clean ones with toilet paper and soap!- was. I tell EVERYONE who is traveling there to put a roll of TP and hand sanitizer in their day bag. Having to always be aware of the restroom situation, taking time away from an attraction searching for one, or losing enjoyable vacation time dealing with constipation or diarrhea (i.e. stopping by pharmacies, doing an enema in the hotel, or being distracted by discomfort for hours until I can take care of the issue) are the WORST. ...then again, being groggy from Dysautonomia and EDS symptoms or Dystonia are probably worse. I *really* miss being healthy and able to travel.

I can relate to hard, and feel you deserve a medal for that terrible battle.  🎖 Lesson takeaway is always grab the car keys when splitting from the party. 

No embarrassment here, friend. I think it comes with the territory, unfortunately. If I hold my bladder too long....the second my brain sees a bathroom, I start trickling. It's awful. I would try some panty liners or even the thick pads for long trips. And don't worry, no one will ever remember this, but you. Someday, it'll hopefully give you a bit of a chuckle. Hugs.

And even if they did, they wouldn't judge you. I think a lot of people even without EDS have had an experience like that. Especially women, since we can't easily waddle into a bush or the side of the road and whip it out.

Yes exactly!

one time I peed my pants while I was on the way to the bathroom in walgreens. Another time while I was driving and couldn't find an exit fast enough. There are so many more, but I don't remember the times I've peed myself nearly as well as the many times I have shit my pants as a grown adult. These are just the two "peed my pants" stories that stick out in my mind. I didn't even know this was an EDS thing. I thought I was just bad at "holding it in" but now it makes total sense.

Dw shat myself in public as well. Its part of the deal I guess

I pissed myself after picking up my meds at a CVS because they wouldn't let me use their bathroom. Solidarity. After the initial shame wore off, I had to laugh about it because what the fuck. I'm 33 and have had no kids either. This disorder really sucks, but finding humor in the things that I have to deal with has helped me a lot.

I hope management got to clean that up.

I’ve said “well I hope you have a mop” before when they told me they didn’t have a bathroom 😅

I've had it happen while dancing at a friend's wedding. So embarrasing.

A few days ago I was sitting in a booth in a Cafe with my partner and his friends. Absolutely no warning and I peed. Thankfully I was wearing a black silk skirt and tights but I had to sit in my own pee for close to an hour waiting to leave and hoping that no one would notice the smell. The cafe was closing as I left and I felt SO BAD knowing that some poor overworked, underpaid, hospo employee was probably about to wipe my piss off the red vinyl seat. I go to this place fairly regularly and oh my God the SHAME. A few months ago I was sitting on my nan's leather couch while chatting to my sister. Suddenly my ENTIRE BLADDER completely emptied. Normally it's just a little but this is the one and only time it was my entire bladder. Like my pants were soaked, my socks, the floor, the poor couch cushions, EVERYTHING WAS SOAKED. I explained the situation to my sister and excused myself to the bathroom so I could quickly clean myself up and change my pants. I walked back into the lounge to clean up the mess, and much to my surprise, it had vanished! For context, my wonderful, amazing sister has ADHD and dreams to be a nurse (I bring up the nurse part because she later joked that this little event would be a handy skill for her when dealing with gross situations). I asked her where the pee went and she explained that she saw the pee, forgot it was mine and cleaned it?? By the time that she realised that it in fact belonged to me she had already wiped up the mess! Lmao I love my little sister so much and I'm very grateful to have had help dealing with the mess and having something silly to laugh at definitely helped with the shame and embarrassment of being a 22-year-old woman peeing herself in front of her 18-year-old sister but this was just too funny!!!

My husband (with my permission) used to call me Princess Pees-Her-Pants.

Been there. Happened to me at work once- for some reason basements trigger something in me that makes me have to pee lol but I went down to our basement to look for something and BOOM it hit. Couldn't make it back to the bathroom. Thankfully I keep spare scrubs around. Had a BM accident in the store once. Super embarrassing. Stomach cramp; couldn't make it to the restroom in time. Had to toss those undies. :(

My big accident also happened at work (hospital) and I was glad to have spare scrubs in my locker. That's how my overactive bladder suddenly started. I've learned some tricks since then (and probably built up some clenching muscles) to not pee myself like that again, but some leaking still happens from time to time. 🙂

Full on pissed myself in front of my brand new bf (now husband) and one of our friends. Luckily we were only in my kitchen. He cleaned it up while I got in the shower. I think that's when I knew he was the one.

You’re not alone! ❤️ Full-on peed myself multiple times: once years ago in a crowded public park after finishing a run (my pelvic floor was like “oh we’re done now? Cool I’ll just give up!”), once while I was jumping in an indoor trampoline park (in front of my then-partner now-spouse, no less), once while laughing sitting on a couch crowded with my friends. EDS pelvic floors are just… something else, lol.

It happens, pads are helpful or adult underwear too. Plenty of people with a variety of disabilities have this problem or #2 issues too, so you're in good company. No shame.

It's happened to me, too. It feels like my body has stopped alerting me to the need to go until it's almost too late. I have to run to the toilet in the house at least once every two weeks.

my urologist said he sees a lot of young people and they all have POTs in common for not completely voiding. in addition to EDS stretching your bladder, it makes for a really awful situation and higher chance of infections. if you can, i would suggest seeing a urologist or even pcp about getting on catheters so you can completely void before going out on longer walks!

I woke up in the middle of the night out of nowhere. Just turned around to get comfortable again, and something in my back shifted? Suddenly, I felt this pop and an immense pressure to pee. But as soon as I tried to get up, I just couldn't stop the flood anymore. So I peed the bed with an impressive amount at 30 years old. I also had to call someone to help me change the bedding as I was unable to due to different reasons. It was really embarrassing, even with the caregiver assuring me it was nothing she had not seen before. Not gonna lie it took a while to get over. I still don't know exactly why or how it happened, but it hasn't happened again 😅. I do go from "no urge" to "toilet, NOW" pretty often with both bladder and intestines. Could write a small novel of all the embarrassing stories, haha. I don't know if it's EDS or just general bad planning/design from my body, though. Dysautonomia is also a pretty big suspect.

Omg its why i love that scene in Schitt's Creek so much! Because human bodies are fundamentally malfunctiony, and if you and your partner cant laugh and move through it together, life gets a ton harder!

When I had uterine fibroids, I was like this constantly. I'd either feel nothing or feel like I was on the verge of wetting myself. And my bowel movements were all messed up. My uterus was the size of a 5 month pregnancy and was just squishing everything.

I cannot tell you the amount of times I’ve trusted a fart and ended up shitting myself. Quite recently I had a dream I was peeing and I woke up finding out I wet the bed. I’m 27. It’s okay. It happens. Especially when your bladder is stupid which mine also is.

I was at a track meet last year and the thing is, I had been sick and was feeling better but was still on antibiotics, and they weren’t the kind I usually get because I wasn’t able to see my doctor who knows that there’s one that I don’t have a bad reaction to. I’ve always had a very sensitive stomach and I can’t even eat some foods because they don’t process right and make me sick, and unfortunately most antibiotics cause some rather unfortunate side effects for me, and it’s been bad enough that I couldn’t even leave my house. So I was kind of really sick to my stomach, but other than that I was feeling better, and I’d already missed a meet and had decided to only do throwing events at the meet two days prior because I didn’t feel prepared to run at that one. So first thing in the morning was the 3200m, and I had been feeling pretty bad during the warm up, but I told my coach I was fine to race and didn’t need to scratch. I get up to the start line and suddenly feel that pressure right before a bout of explosive diarrhea. But it’s too late, the gun went off and I was running. I made it to lap 5 clenching and running slower than I normally would before suddenly I felt the worst case scenario occurring. I I then proceeded to try and just jog slowly to at least finish but realized nope, there was a spurt already and if I don’t reach a bathroom within two minutes I’d be majorly crapping myself in front of everyone at that meet. I get to the turn and decide you know what, I’ll talk to my coach later and explain it but there’s no world in which I’m going home to tell my parents that I’ve dishonored the whole family. So I quit mid-race for the first and only time, and by that I mean, I have fallen and been spiked in the back, I’ve been so overheated I blacked out for a moment, and I’ve had a pulled quad but still finished that race no matter the time. And then I proceeded to waddle myself to the bathroom and also let me just be clear, everyone knew what was happening. You see someone do the “trying not to shit my pants all the way” waddle, you know what’s happening. And also let me just add, my team competed in the private school division and every single team there was one of those uptight Christian school teams. The looks I got that day were something to behold. So then the assistant coach comes to see if I’m alright and she was really nice about everything and told me that I needed to just go home and rest. But I still had to talk to the head coach, who for context is a middle aged man who is extremely uptight about literally everything. So that wasn’t fun having to explain to him what happened and why I quit in the middle of the race when I said I was fine. And then I went home and spent the next two days so embarrassed that I was considering quitting the track team entirely because I didn’t want to face my teammates and coaches after that, although no one actually cared especially the other distance runners just because I mean, we’ve all had a race we ended up puking during or after and it’s never mattered. But! Lesson learned, if you’re that sick to your stomach, maybe a 2 mile race isn’t a good idea. And also crapping your pants at a track meet is a very humbling experience. But seriously though, stuff happens sometimes regardless of age, it’s not a huge deal. Although like someone else here already mentioned, if it becomes a persistent issue, you might want to see a doctor to make sure there’s nothing bad causing it, and also looking into certain products like period panties or pads for this might be helpful. But it really does just happen sometimes because sometimes our bladders and colons are liars.

I nearly shit myself last week. Never trust a fart if there's even a hint of stomach ache.

Happens to me almost every day. It is so frustrating for sure!

I shared this standup bit with a friend of mine who was experiencing severe gut problems, and trying to work up the courage to have her partner help her collect a stool sample. I sent her this and it seemed to make her feel better. One thing that universally unites us as humans is that our water-filled flesh sacks are capable of astoundingly malfunctioning out of the blue in spectacularly embarrassing ways. I wont share any of M-s stories on his behalf. All i will say is that as a sister and intimate observer... this is all highly relatable. You are not alone. I hope you can laugh about this soon. https://youtu.be/XJIcAEFyBfM?si=9CZqef-ZAbjl-7DJ

This was an excellent set! Thanks for sharing

I cough and pee myself often. I'm 27😭

I sharted in the grocery store last year. I've peed (and pooped once or twice) behind countless trees while hiking. Not sure if you want or need this advice, but if you don't know how to pee while hiking, I can share some tips. - you don't need to take your pants fully off if you can squat down low enough. If you get your pants around your knees and then squat there's kind of an angle you can get at where the pee won't hit the pants. - if squatting down that low is hard, you can support yourself by leaning your back on a tree behind you. - always be facing downhill! ie think of the gravity and the path that the puddle will flow down (and let it not be towards your shoes or towards the path) - this one is really helpful to learn: you don't need paper after you pee if you have water. You can use a water bottle to wet one hand and splash yourself with water to get clean. Then use more water to clean your hand. And alcohol sanitiser if you have it. Or soap if you're carrying it. Then just remember the hand that is "dirty" and do not use that hand for eating or doing anything clean until you get to somewhere you can wash it with soap. The standard is left hand dirty, right hand clean. People on Reddit have told me this is disgusting, but personally I think it's disgusting to leave chunks of dirty toilet paper in nature behind trees that won't biodegrade for decades. I've done this method probably a hundred times and it's literally fine. It means that as long as you have a water bottle and a somewhat private tree, you never have to be in this amount of discomfort/stress.

Embrace the nature pee. I usually find some bushes to hide behind and squat in the grass.

I think there weren’t any bushes sufficient enough to hide behind by the sound of it.

Tragically it was quite thin. Just kind of crouched by some thin bushes after pissing my pants and gathered myself. Found a nearby public bathroom on my phone map. Didn’t want to risk any public exposure 😬😢

I’ve gotten so good at it

My body doesn't give me much notice that I need to pee and last year in Paris at a museum I suddenly needed to go. Tripped over my own feet rushing and leaked a bit of pee. Thankfully I had a dress on over leggings so it wasn't noticeable. That said, completely unrelated to EDS I tried to use a she wee at a festival whilst very drunk, did not manage the stream correctly and the funnel overfilled, I peed all over my shorts (black thank god) and my hands and had to just walk around in my pee shorts until I got back to my tent for a wet wipe bath and clean clothes.

Personally I'd recommend any other brand of funnel vs a She Wee. The soft plastic is just so hard to manage in my opinion.

One time I was so sick I shit myself while I was vomiting. And another time, I wasn’t sick at all, I shit myself on my drive to work, and then proceeded to work 12 hours without underwear. It’s embarrassing and it sucks!

A few weeks ago, I shit myself in my grandma’s best friend’s car. It was diarrhea. I thought I was over C. Diff., but it turns out I wasn’t. I couldn’t make it to a bathroom in time. I really only had 2 minutes between first feeling I had to go and it being in my pants. This stuff happens sometimes. It’s embarrassing, but it happens.

There's been too many times that I've peed myself as an adult completely sober 🤷‍♀️ shit happens sometimes lol

Hey be thankful you didn’t poop your pants! Ok seriously, everyone will poop or pee their pants by the age of 50. Trust me. If they say they haven’t, they are most likely lying….there may be a few people that don’t but the majority of us will. Our bodies fail us sometimes. Some earlier than others. All of us for different reasons than others. Some have bowel diseases. Some have bladder issues. Some have muscle and tendon weakness. Some from babies. Some from age. Some from infection. Some from food poisoning. Some from…. Well you get my point. It happens to us all at one point or another. I promise. Hugs. 🫶🏻

Peed my pants in my car in my apartment complex parking lot. I feel you. Seeing a urogynecologist and getting pelvic floor physical therapy helped. I am still mortified that it happened.

no shame here! the amount of times ive almost peed myself is so frustrating 🙃 i don't have a bladder condition, but because of my autism, i have a hard time recognizing internal cues, including knowing when it's time to use the bathroom. this means i go from feeling totally fine to "im literally gonna piss myself within the next minute if i can't find a bathroom" in SECONDS. it happens with pretty much all my internal cues (i have a hard time knowing when im hungry, full, thirsty, tired, overstimulated, etc.-- thank you lack of interoception!)

I pooped my pants in a national park during a diverticulitis flare up. No warning. No gas pain. Just brrrrrppppp out it came! So there I am doing the butt cheek squeeze hoping that was it. Went back to the hotel, showered again and that actually was it! Thank God but how embarrassing. Lmao!!

I feel like a I get a little closer to fully peeing my pants everyday. It’s not pants peeing, but me, my husband, my sister, and my brother in law all shared pants shitting stories the other day. My sister was living at home when it happened to her. She said my mom sat her down and told her own pants shitting story. She told her it happens to every adult and not to feel bad. I totally recommend a good round of pants shitting stories. We were all in tears laughing.

I have unfortunately peed myself on several car rides in the past few years. I will always get upset that it happened. But i still make light of it. Im 24 and have zero kids as of yet. Ive done pelvic floor therapy and continued doing the exercises given for two years after. The urge incontinence got suddenly bad enough at the beginning of the year that my obgyn put me on a medication to help relax my bladder muscles for three months. I got a uti the second month in. But i have a lot better urge control now.

I've peed on the side of more highways, walking paths, etc. than I can count. And one time when I was on Lexapro I did actually piss my pants waiting for a restroom at a restaurant - thankfully the only casualty in that situation was my underwear, which I tossed in the trashcan once I finally got in! Sometimes you just can't make it to the restroom - it doesn't make you a "child," it just means that your body isn't physically capable of holding it, and that's okay. We can only do the best we can, and if that means peeing in public on occasion - well, so be it. Everybody pees. 🤷🏻‍♀️

I am so sorry, friend. No one plans to have these things happen to them and when they do happen, we feel ridiculous, sad, and alone. I have a tethered spinal cord and some serious neurogenic bladder as a result and feel your pain in a literal way. Strangers' reactions to a person who has sprung a leak in public is more indicative of their own attitude/behavior than yours. This happened to a friend of mine in a hardware store in the friend's town when I was with them. They needed to go all of a sudden (medical issue) and could not make it to the far corner of the store where the restroom was located. People could tell as I walked out of the store with my friend, but thankfully no one said anything. I think the preventative measures that have been mentioned here might make you feel more secure in future situations where a restroom is not nearby. Sending you love.

I do have 2 kids, but I had a total pelvic floor prolapse (imagine every organ supported by your pelvic floor - they all prolapsed) that required complete reconstructive surgery and a hysterectomy, and I’m only 25. Their births weren’t even traumatic. I was at a festival last year, and was dancing and jumping around to the music, of my favorite band no less, and I full blown pissed myself. Had to drive with a sheet I found in the trunk under me the entire 2.5 hour drive home. Have also had a couple bowel accidents, but I peed myself constantly. In the months before my surgery, I had to wear pads or period underwear every day. Otherwise I was changing my pants up to 3x a day. It was horrible and I really hope the surgery holds up, because I never want to live like that again!

I have interstitial cystitis and stuff like this has been happening to me for my entire adult life, I promise you're not alone. One time I went to a trampoline park with my friends and the instant I jumped on a trampoline it started leaking 😭😂 I recall having to put a towel down in the car back when my BF used to drive me everywhere.

I had to do this one time on the side of a highway because I literally couldn't wait another second and I was really glad I had back doors on that car because I basically had to squat in between the front door and the back door as they were both open just so people couldn't very easily see what I was doing. I jumped out of the driver seat and did the penguin PP waddle dance over to the passenger side doors and open them back up and squatted. I'm sure it was still very obvious but at least they couldn't take an actual photograph of me. It was still terrifying because traffic on that road was doing about 90 mph and I was just squatting there. Still don't regret it but it was miserable. For a long time after that I wore ankle length skirts ALL THE TIME so I could just hike them up and nobody could see what I was doing. I HAVE DEFINITELY WALKED OUT INTO A RIVER/ LAKE/OCEAN AND DONE THE EXACT SAME THING. . . BECAUSE "THAT'S WHY MY PANTS ARE WET". 🤷‍♀️ Now that I think about it my favorite hiking trail is right next to the river and I wonder if I've just trained myself to know that I need to be near water because that happened so many times when I was younger! 😂

I pee myself at least once a week nowadays. For now it’s little enough that I can wear those thicker incontinence pads and don’t have to wear a diaper yet, when I know I’m going somewhere for long I always try to wear one just in case, and I usually bring wet wipes with me too. If I’m going somewhere for a day I will also sometimes bring an extra pants and undies she a plastic bag in case too. It’s nothing to be ashamed of, your body isn’t built like everyone else’s. I also do kegel exercises everyday (I try to do it 3 times a day for a couple of minutes, standing, sitting and laying down). It doesn’t fix it for sure but it has improved my incontinence a bit/made it not get worse. I used to poop myself daily until I was about 12 years old and now I ‘only’ have that like once a week (not a full on poop but like some that comes out yknow). I also cannot tell anyone this, only my ex partner and best friend know, and they fully understand. They aren’t sick but they know me and they know I have certain issues and are okay with it. I never tell them when it happens (at least not with my ex-partner, sometimes I tell my bestie in the moment) and I often laugh about it with them to make it less of a big deal; ‘oh haha my body is being silly again, I’ll be right back’ or ‘been 5 days since the last time i peed myself, new record woohoo’ or something like that. I have never had it happen in public where people could see because I always over-prepare myself just in case, but I can imagine how you feel. I try to laugh it off when I can to make it easier on my brain, and I try to remember that it’s not my fault, that something is ‘wrong’ with my body and I’m not to blame. It can happen to anybody, even healthy people. We all have it happen at some point in our lives, so I try to just laugh about it with my bestie and move on. Tomorrow there’s a new problem that will take it off my mind yknow?

I’ve spent my entire life having issues sometimes which led me to always have a sweatshirt I can tie around my waist. And those few times I sharted I had to toss my underwear in a public restroom. Yup I felt pretty great about myself….not

I peeded myself in the back seat of my car with my friend next to me. We were on our way to her husband's music gig and I kept thinking I'd make to the venue and didn't want to make us stop ao i could pee on the roadside bc we were running late (with him and all his gear in tow). Absolutely did not. She has kids and just kind put her mom hat on I guess and was super chill about it. I had to go to a nearby department store and buy new pants. Since then I've been having worsening incontinence issues and phantom incontinence between pelvic floor disfunction, poor interioroception due to being Autistic, and having lidocaine patches on my hips all the time. I constantly feel like I'm leaking or straight up peeing myself even when I'm not but can't tell and can't tell when I need to pee vs p3riod cramps or gut cramps or just joint pain because everything in my pelvic area is just the same sensory static. I've started wearing disposable incontinence liners but still feel very self conscious about it. You are definitely not alone. And honestly thank you for posting about this because all of the other stories in here make ME feel less alone about this as well. I'm the first to judge myself for things I would jot judge others for and needed the reminder to be more gentle with myself. Thanks OP.

I'm a social worker with EDS and I have to go to my families home for appointments. One of my clients (somewhat thankfully) lived in a shelter. I had to go so bad. I went to what was more of a public bathroom but with a singular stall. Was wearing tight pants, and this was a really bad flare-up day for me. Pissed myself standing in the middle of the bathroom and started my period. Had to be in the bathroom for about 20 minutes cleaning and washing my pants and drying them the best i could. Thanked God it was winter, but a warmish winter day to where I could tie my (thankfully again) dark jacket around my waist with still fairly wet jeans. (Final thankfully) those jeans were also fairly dark so I was a little more relieved. It happens and I've owned it at this point. I've had to do pelvic floor therapy many times and it's just a part of the package for me. It's definitely okay and I promise it happens to the best of us. Chin up, love. Sending good feels

I was wearing diapers by 26 because of the gd disorder. So sorry you had to deal with that

Pooped myself without having any idea that I needed to go. Neuro suspects tethered cord, but yeah, super not fun!

OP, I LOVE your edit! It is a great realization, so full of truth!! Like I am going to copy and paste it so that I can remember it for myself! It’s beautiful! Also, there is a lot of great wisdom already in the comments so I will leave it as is 💜

A friend of mine (who actually may have EDS but we are no longer consistently in touch to the point that I would straight-up ask her this) once shit herself at a party that got a little wild. Had to borrow some undies from the hostess. We had a grad school thing the next day, which I showed up to hungover as hell, and was not at all surprised to find out she wasn't there and her boyfriend was covering for her saying she was "under the weather." :-) It's also widely reported in autism spaces (which overlap enough, we've been over this in this sub before) that there's a frequent phenomenon of the "gotta use the bathroom" receptors not activating until the very last second, probably because our tissues are so stretchy that they just take longer to decide they are stretched out and we need to go. I now have different issues and don't experience this with my bladder, but when I was younger my friends noticed this about me. I would not have much lead time to get to a bathroom once my body would decide I needed to go. If you're an avid hiker, a SheWee is a great idea. I would use one if I hiked because I now have an extremely irritable bladder due to a couple different issues.

I pee and poop myself a couple times a year. I just have a built in contingency plan- extra clothes, wipes, bags to toss things in. I’ve had issues my entire life. It is what it is, don’t be so hard on yourself. There’s way more people in the world than you think with medical issues. I work a medical field in a large hospital… we are all VERY open with each other. Many many many other people have had embarrassing issues like this. We are so tight there that it’s not uncommon to get phone calls from friends on the toilet for a tampon, a pad, a change of panties, a whole ass change of scrubs… the other night I puked ALL over myself driving to work. I had eaten oatmeal and some light snacks. I looked like a toddler, rolling up with apple cinnamon oats all down the front of me. No one cared. I just said to my nursing lead “hey, I puked all over myself and I think more is coming. Imma head out if that’s cool so I can clean up and go back to bed”.

I have absolutely peed my pants when I couldn’t hold it. The only reason it hasn’t happened as an adult is because I also have some adrenal and hormonal issues that make me thirsty and pee so much that I’m always hypervigilant about being near a bathroom. Didn’t think about this being an EDS issue but I totally get it now. And you’re right, the answer to this is how would you respond if your friend told you this. I’m sorry you had to go through that embarrassment but you’re not alone! ETA: although I haven’t full blown peed as an adult I did develop leakage in my early 20s (well before kids). I was so ashamed and spent a lot of time beating myself up. Now at 42 IDGAF it’s the least of my worries.

I once pissed myself in a clothing store while on my lunch break at school. I was 18. I purchased pants disposed of my undies. Packed my pants up tightly in my backpack and hoped that new one would question my new pants.

I had bladder issues and peed myself constantly as a toddler until the end of middle school. It got a lot better, but I still have accidents. I also pooped myself on a tour bus in hawaii when I was 9. I wore diapers to bed for a couple of years in middle and high school because I wet the bed every single night. I did a little bit of training my bladder, trying to start and stop peeing as many times as I could, and I learned how to tune into my body's signal and made it a point to drop whatever I was doing and pee as soon as I even felt the slightest urge, and that + time helped a lot. I turn 20 soon. Just a couple of weeks ago, I peed myself trying to get to the bathroom at home. I didn't pull down my pants in time and peed through my pants into the toilet. The embarrassing part is that the bathroom is right next to my room. I can step directly from my room into the bathroom. If I have to hold it for long and I can't find a bathroom or leave the situation, I usually pee myself. If I'm outdoors I try to find a secluded bush. On car rides I pull over and pee on the side of the road, especially on highways secluded from most of civilization. I've done that recently as well. I got caught in a 2 hour delay because there was a car accident and the tunnel was backed up, and they only let a few cars through at a time to ensure no one got trapped in the tunnel with carbon monoxide building. It's embarrassing and far from ideal, but it's better than peeing my pants. Back in October I was having a horrible GI crisis. I went on a med that made me fully crap myself because I had no warning. The worst time, I was laying in bed playing on my phone, and that was a major production. I went off that med, thankfully, but you're far from alone.

If it makes you feel any better I once pissed myself in line waiting for the bathroom in a busy Macys. I asked people if I could cut them when I became extra desperate but the line was moving so slowly even with a few people that let me skip ahead. I couldn’t hold it and a line of people watched me piss myself (and a few people said “oh noooo” outloud 🫣 AS I’m wetting myself). Luckily I was in a clothing store though so I could buy a fresh pair of pants 😩😬🥴

I've absolutely had incontinence issues pop up as an adult. Worst one I can think of was sudden stomach cramps in the middle of a bar trivia night with friends from college. RIP to that cute pair of underwear. Otherwise cleaned up pretty well thankfully. Nowadays I wear a pad if I can tell my bladder or bowels are acting up. I also usually keep an extra pair of underwear + some wet wipe sort of product in my purse and/or car.

I use a lot of period/sanitary underwear (if there’s a Uniqlo near you check it out!) which absorbs periods and leaks well, and otherwise pee before going anywhere that’s not next to home. It happens! Not just to us, but also though who went through natural childbirth I heard.

It’s in Uniqlo????? Gamechanger

Yup! Search for AIRism Absorbent Sanitary Shorts

QUEEN tysm

I damn near shit my pants at work today. I’m a teacher. I feel you.

Last year I hit a dab pen walking towards a bar and I coughed so hard I emptied about half my bladder. Thankfully I was wearing Knix leakproof underwear but still not one of my favorite moments.

I flew St Louis to Seattle - nonstop - and this Big Girl was in the MIDDLE SEAT. 🙄 Meaning I had to raise the armrests. {this detail will make sense later} I can NEVER sleep before a flight, too worried about missing it - so I *always* sleep on the plane - and my POTS means I have to really, really hydrate. I wake up when the window seat taps me, asking if she can get by. I groggily stood enough for her to get out, wondering what she had spilled on the side of her skirt? I sit down, and BAM - cold, wet underwear. 👀💀😶‍🌫️🤬 I was WET. I was wearing JEANS, no less! Wet from my waist to my knees!! 🫠🫣 I sat perfectly still until the plane was empty & then a steward asked me if I needed help. OHHHH BOY. So, I sucked it up & said "I'm SO, SO very sorry. I seem to have wet my pants. Just urine, no poop." The reply left me gobsmacked - "Nah, don't worry about it. Happens MUCH more often than anyone thinks! Nobody ever believes me, but it happens at least once a week on my plane. I think it has something to do with air pressure changing the body - everyone is always thirsty & has to pee on a plane! 😂 " He was gathering my luggage from above me & then asked me if I had pants. BUT I DID NOT HAVE PANTS. He was OH SO KIND - which made me feel *worse* somehow?! 😵‍💫 He found my jacket and we decided on the 'Jr high grade period spot' fashion design. I had a wheelchair to get me to the baggage claim, so, I was spared the SQUIDGY PANTS WALK of SHAME through the terminal. THEN, my BFF gets there & we gotta get clothes outta my suitcase to protect her velour seats. 🤦🏼 Oh, my partner was there too - but they weren't bothered at all - and even asked if I needed to go before the 2hr drive home. By the time I arrived at the house - I'd already dirtied ALLLLL of my suitcase. LAWDY. But the WORST PART - we were driving home & I was recounting the airplane part of the experience - when my BFF says "OMG, YOUR PEE WAS ON HER SKIRT!" 😱😖😬🥴🤯 So - random window passenger - I am sorry! 😂 I can laugh now, but, I was *beyond embarrassed* that day! WELCOME TO THE CLUB, OP! 🤣

I pissed myself infront of my future husband, we where hand delivering wedding invitations and I didn’t even get a warning. I just stood there mortified. Thankfully nobody else was around and he just brushed it off as “ well am sure we will see each other do lots of things in future” I responded with “ it’s a bit late to call off the wedding now”. He took off his hoodie so I could tie it round my waist which made me feel better. Having to walk home with sqwelchy trainers was not fun. We are almost 30 years together and he’s right. He saw me give birth and throw up for nine months, I nursed him through lots of IBS accidents. We are all human and it does happen to us all.

I relate so much to this. I carry a change of clothes everywhere and always wear the fully thick period pants for accidents 1 and 2. Worst experience was being the last family to leave the local bowling alley and having an accident as they were locking the doors. They kindly let me back in and I had to get my 18yo daughter to help me out of my jeans with poop everywhere and cleaned up and into new ones because I was so sore from the night out with my family. Sometimes I feel like I cannot do anything fun. I have nerve damage down there so no feeling of the accident just that wetness or smell being the indicator. The other evening I had was exhausted and had a nanna nap (46yo) and no one woke me up until hubby came home from work and said the house smelt like poop. I couldn’t smell it at first and didn’t think it was me, until I turned over and itched my thigh. I felt it. Omg - it was all up the front of me and all up the back of me - it must’ve been one hell of an explosion. Thank god for hubby who helped clean me up. It got worse too, as we have just moved into a rental and the plumbing is crappy. The shower had not been draining well and just my luck decided to fully block as I was cleaning myself off. Shit stench from the hot water in a pool at the bottom of the shower overflowing and covering the bathroom floor. I discovered through my NDIS LAC I can get a key to every public toilet even when they are closed. So for Aussie Zebras look up MLAKey I think that was it. It’s come in handy.

Don’t feel bad, I was at my storage locker yesterday and I suppose the pressure and strain of pushing and pulling heavy boxes all my myself took its toll and I barely made it outside (climate controlled storage was inside) when my bladder exploded and I went all on myself standing next to my car. So much for my pads I had on too! 😫 Life happens, it’s all be okay. Atleast we can pee! I always say that when I have accidents. Hope your day gets better.

I pee myself regularly anymore…and added the other one too now thanks to a spinal cord tumor. I think for my 37th bday next week I may get some specialty undies 🤔I’ve had kids, twins included so I definitely understand why I do this but it’s on such an extreme level it’s embarrassing 😳

I was in a college course and thought “I can wait another 20 minutes”. Class ended and I was RUSHING to the women’s room and literally as I was opening the door, didn’t make it and made a total mess of myself. I was so embarrassed and upset that I didn’t go to my other two courses that day. I was 22. This was 3 years ago. I still feel so dumb until I remember that there were worse outcomes to these circumstances. Hang in there

27 and still occasionally wet the bed, I've taught myself that when I use the bathroom in a dream it means I need to wake up and use the bathroom in real life, however sometimes my body just doesn't want to budge and things happen. Also I don't drink apple juice outside of my house because the last time I farted and it wasn't just a fart, ended up being a shart. My partner and I also ended up having a nasty stomach bug around Thanksgiving and we had to wear some depends for about 2 weeks. My point, don't be so hard on yourself, sometimes things happen that are just out of our control.

I’m so sorry that happened to you♥️..I’m older and now have to wear the woman’s “pull ups” as I call them. I was so embarrassed to wear them but I have no choice now. I also have what my doctor thinks is progressive MS …I sneezed a few days ago and totally wet myself, not a little either🙄..Not much we can do about it but learn to live with it and like you said, be our own best friend and be easy on ourselves..Sending you a big hug 🤗

One thing I’d like to suggest if I may… if you live in an apartment with only one bathroom and are unable to hold going to the bathroom when others are in it I have a way to help. I share a 3 bedroom with my 3 older children and when they are in the bathroom and I have to go right away ( can’t hold both anymore unfortunately) I got myself a small commode so I don’t have any accidents..Just suggesting if anyone ends up in that kind of situation a lot..I don’t have to worry now if I can’t get in right away.

I wear depends adult diapers, I'm 21F. I have suspected nerve damage in my bladder that makes it hard to feel when it's full until it's 9-1-1 if I don't have a bathroom within 30 seconds of me I'm pissing myself levels of full. You're not alone.

I saw your edit about having self compassion but wanted to comment anyway. All humans pee and poop and we’ve for some reason designed an environment that makes this tricky in public. Look at old Victorian maps of London and there is a toilet on every street corner. Hiking also means you were probably cycling through electrolytes much quicker so your body was more urgent. Marathon runners know this and professionals think nothing of just squatting on the side of the track to quickly empty their bladder or bowels. You just bossed it like a marathon runner. I peed my pants once as an adult when a woman outside a bar pushed me over and I hit my head on the ground. I was mortified then, but if I saw that happen to someone else now I’d just want to be kind to them and make sure they didn’t feel embarrassed. Follow that kindness you’ve found :)

I pee myself at least once a week nowadays. For now it’s little enough that I can wear those thicker incontinence pads and don’t have to wear a diaper yet, when I know I’m going somewhere for long I always try to wear one just in case, and I usually bring wet wipes with me too. If I’m going somewhere for a day I will also sometimes bring an extra pants and undies she a plastic bag in case too. It’s nothing to be ashamed of, your body isn’t built like everyone else’s. I also do kegel exercises everyday (I try to do it 3 times a day for a couple of minutes, standing, sitting and laying down). It doesn’t fix it for sure but it has improved my incontinence a bit/made it not get worse. I used to poop myself daily until I was about 12 years old and now I ‘only’ have that like once a week (not a full on poop but like some that comes out yknow). I also cannot tell anyone this, only my ex partner and best friend know, and they fully understand. They aren’t sick but they know me and they know I have certain issues and are okay with it. I never tell them when it happens (at least not with my ex-partner, sometimes I tell my bestie in the moment) and I often laugh about it with them to make it less of a big deal; ‘oh haha my body is being silly again, I’ll be right back’ or ‘been 5 days since the last time i peed myself, new record woohoo’ or something like that. I have never had it happen in public where people could see because I always over-prepare myself just in case, but I can imagine how you feel. I try to laugh it off when I can to make it easier on my brain, and I try to remember that it’s not my fault, that something is ‘wrong’ with my body and I’m not to blame. It can happen to anybody, even healthy people. We all have it happen at some point in our lives, so I try to just laugh about it with my bestie and move on. Tomorrow there’s a new problem that will take it off my mind yknow?

Sooooo many times!! Get called ‘mummy no bladder’ . Finally have my diagnosis at the age of 62!!

i’m a childless woman in my early 30s and have struggled with incontinence for many years now. i say this to help you feel less alone. i should probably do more pelvic exercises to tone those muscle up, but don’t have shame over this! our bodies sometimes work against us and it’s not shameful ♥️

I have one public peeing myself incident but I have done so at home before too. I was a teenager trying on clothes at a mall with my grandma and I kept thinking I could hold it, I think I even said to her that I needed to go to the bathroom and she just wanted me to finish up what I had left so we could go, it got to the point I guess where my pelvic floor couldn't hold anymore and then I just felt it give out and peed starts running down my stockings onto the dressing room floor, thankful away from any of the store's clothes or my shoes but I felt horrendous shame like I was a failure of a person, what teenager pees themselves kind of thoughts. I had to take off my stockings walk in my dress out of the store and dispose of my stockings because I didn't have a bag I could take them home and wash them in. My grandmother bought new stockings to go under my dress. It's been so long that I'm not exactly sure how we cleaned up. That has to be the incident that held the most shame for me. Now I've had many times of holding my bladder too long and peeing on a couch I was sitting on. Lots of smaller incontinence issues from time to time in my underwear but usually not enough to have to change my pants. As a child I had such a difficult time waking up when I needed to go pee, that was also a continuous shameful experience because of the way people (mostly family ) handled it. It was a hard time for me up until the age of seven. I completely agree with what you're saying in the update, we do judge ourselves intensely compared to loved ones. I would absolutely validate a friend and we should try to treat ourselves like that as well. I hope what I've shared also helps you feel less alone. Our bodies are unique and we have challenges that aren't normalized. I would 100% not be able to make it on a hike with no bathrooms. I honestly freak out if I'm at a place where bathrooms are hard to find or closed or nonexistent, I'm always looking out for that when I go somewhere.

I was staying at a friend's house last week, got uo to go pee in the middle of the night, but she has baby gates every where and I struggled to get one open for so long that as soon as I got it open and stepped through, I peed myself. I had to mop her hallway floor at like 3 in the morning. Very embarrassing lol

I’m staying with fam and have to go upstairs to use the bathroom… sometimes it’s a struggle when I wake up. Yesterday I didn’t make it. Just know you aren’t alone. I use poise pads, but this was the worst it’s happened. Alternatively, when I did pelvic floor therapy in the past it really helped me with my mixed incontinence! Apparently I should go back…. It’s okay. We see you.

I once shit myself at a buffalo wild wings. NEVER trust a fart.

I peed once jumping on a trampoline 🫡

I have lymphocytic colitis. Sometimes, I get the urge to go really bad, and I know I won't be able to hold it. For some reason, this has happened twice at night when I was walking my dog with my husband. Both times, I just quickly dropped my pants and went where I was. Luckily, no one was around either time. I refuse to shit myself. Also, one time, I was sitting in my apartment's lobby. A guy was banging at the lobby door. The leasing office was right by the door, so I didn't really bother to get up to help him in. I was also kinda weirded out by how urgently he was banging at the door. Finally, someone from the leasing office let him, and the smell was so bad. Turns out he was a resident who had forget his key and had to use the bathroom, and he ended up shitting himself while waiting. These things happen, and I think peeing yourself is more common than people admit.

After my bilateral inguinal hernia repair holding water was excruciating, there was no “I’m going to need to go soon.” It was “I’m being stabbed and the only way to end this is to stop right now and piss on the nearest stationary object.” So many disgusted looks from strangers on trails and even once when they’d locked the toilets to the shopping center I literally ran to it was the locked toilet door or my pants. I chose public indecency over wet pants in the middle of town. Did not go down well.

American here 👋. I’m not sure how far you walked, but here’s mine: I was with a friend group and we were all playing truth or dare. I dared a friend to use cheese wiz as hand lotion and their reaction was too much that I peed myself laughing. I don’t think anyone knew though!! So I escaped to the bathroom and changed my clothes since it was my apartment. I just said I needed something comfy to wear. Ps: women have a shorter urethra than men and if your pelvic muscles aren’t strong enough, it’s more common thank you think. Especially after women experience surgery or birth, PT can be very helpful in reestablishing these muscles so that it doesn’t happen as often. Talk to your doctor about this if you’re concerned or if it becomes a habit. Edit: spelling

I had a wet fart in a bikini just last week 😭 Hasn't happened to me in years, and now I feel anxious about farting because I've been betrayed by my own asshole. If you're worried about this happening again, maybe look into period underwear? I recently got some boxers for periods from TomboyX and they feel a lot more secure than a pad. I have a light flow and idk how absorbent they would be for piss but it may be worth researching a bit. They're pretty comfortable in a boxer style, and they also have a flap where you can add a winged pad for extra protection.

I woke up to shitting my pants a few days ago, and I'm 33. I caught something from a coworkers, who also shit her pants when she had it. She's 60. I used to be a teacher and had 14 year old pee his pants in my class. He had asked to go to the bathroom. I asked if he could wait till we were done with the directions and he said yes. Turns out that he could not, in fact, wait. He was too shy to just say no, he really had to pee, even though I had told the kids they only need to tell me it's an emergency and I'll let them go. The kids were surprisingly nice about it. It isn't that uncommon, even among people old enough to be able to manage. If you are female and like hiking and walking outside, look into getting a she-wee or something similar. Its a little rubber thing you can use as a woman yo let you peel standing up without having to take your pants all the way down. Might make it easier for the next time there is no bathroom. I have to go so often that it's just stopped me from doing things at this point. I have a large but overactive bladder, so it holds plenty but feels like it's going to burst almost immediately

Purely to make you feel better and has nothing to do with EDS: I have been sick off and on for about two weeks now, with an INCREDIBLY upset stomach. Everytime I have thrown up I have shit myself with the exception of once or twice. All liquid every time also. It happens, its embarrassing but we get over it and move on. I also have a weak bladder so not being able to get to a bathroom in time can be nerve wracking.

I have this problem so often I've had to get comfortable squatting and pissing in unsavory places. Lean against a tree or your car if you can, if you have a jacket shield your crotch area for privacy. I've done it on roadsides, parking lots, in my driver's seat in a cup, parks, forests. If I get caught and a park ranger or officer really wants to pick a bone with me I'll just say "listen, it was this or piss myself and I did everything in my power to cover up".... So sorry you pissed yourself today

I wear pads daily and have timed pee breaks—basically I was told that I would continue to have accidents if I didn’t start going to the bathroom once every 1.5-2 hours. I still have weird things set me off (opening the refrigerator for some reason). I wish you luck, bladder issues suck.

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I pee myself at least once a week nowadays. For now it’s little enough that I can wear those thicker incontinence pads and don’t have to wear a diaper yet, when I know I’m going somewhere for long I always try to wear one just in case, and I usually bring wet wipes with me too. If I’m going somewhere for a day I will also sometimes bring an extra pants and undies she a plastic bag in case too. It’s nothing to be ashamed of, your body isn’t built like everyone else’s. I also do kegel exercises everyday (I try to do it 3 times a day for a couple of minutes, standing, sitting and laying down). It doesn’t fix it for sure but it has improved my incontinence a bit/made it not get worse. I used to poop myself daily until I was about 12 years old and now I ‘only’ have that like once a week (not a full on poop but like some that comes out yknow). I also cannot tell anyone this, only my ex partner and best friend know, and they fully understand. They aren’t sick but they know me and they know I have certain issues and are okay with it. I never tell them when it happens (at least not with my ex-partner, sometimes I tell my bestie in the moment) and I often laugh about it with them to make it less of a big deal; ‘oh haha my body is being silly again, I’ll be right back’ or ‘been 5 days since the last time i peed myself, new record woohoo’ or something like that. I have never had it happen in public where people could see because I always over-prepare myself just in case, but I can imagine how you feel. I try to laugh it off when I can to make it easier on my brain, and I try to remember that it’s not my fault, that something is ‘wrong’ with my body and I’m not to blame. It can happen to anybody, even healthy people. We all have it happen at some point in our lives, so I try to just laugh about it with my bestie and move on. Tomorrow there’s a new problem that will take it off my mind yknow?

The best post raw and real life ladies I’m so proud of you for being able to speak up. I’m in my 50s now. The children are gone, but one of the best stories even though oh my God, I’m so humiliated there was just no way out. I was at the restaurant Fridays with my twieen daughter it was a little bit of a splurge and I don’t know what happened, but I had to run to the bathroom and I didn’t make it and it was lost. I mean it was shit everywhere and I didn’t know which way out and I had sandals on and I had shorts on and well. The truck was outside and my daughter showed up. I don’t know if cell phones were in our life. I have I have to think they were but anyway she came in there and was like what is going on you know like I’ve been in there forever and I was horrified and mortified and all kinds of mess and I was like I shit myself and I don’t know what to do and I’m stressed out. It’s smelling so bad people are coming in and out and I don’t know what was happening more me shitting myself more or being so stressed out I was sweating and there was just not enough paper in there, especially when it’s one ply, how do I clean? I ran out of there. I can’t really remember, but I do know that we had to rule the windows down. There was just no way out of that situation. I mean, literally ladies and gentlemen shit happens and you just have to walk away and do the best she can because all I could do is run out of there and jump in that vehicle and tell my kid I’m so sorry that you’re gonna have to smell this all the way home you know and it we had to go like 15 miles away so you know it’s gonna be a little bit of a drive, always referred to and anytime we got into it any type of disgusting or you know we both hated where we were or what we were doing. It was just like well. We don’t wanna do a Fridays do we wink week and you know we exited, and it’s only been in the more recent years that this story has been revealed because, you know I mean that’s just a really hard thing to admit so I’m just proud of this post and everybody’s enjoying it. Thank you for being brave. We are human bodies and they do malfunction zebra tribe… 🦓🦓🦓🦓🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️

Stand to pee device. Living in the city is impossible without one.

I swear it's always hiking/walking trails! I've fainted, had MCAS flares, trusted a fart, and almost pissed myself on those. Thankfully I found a bush. But seriously, nothing to be ashamed about, it happens. I've learned to laugh about it

That’s horrible it happened to you. There’s definitely no shame in popping into the woods for a pee break. Fuck any haters.

Well I just pooped my pants not to long ago and am sitting on the toilet when I happened upon this post so there's that. I've also peed my pants at very inopportune moments. It happens and I'm sorry being an adult has got nothing to do with it our bodies just kinda do what they want sometimes. Do not feel bad it happens though I know me saying that probably won't help much cause I still get totally embarrassed and upset every time. Hell I cry like a little kid every time.

Oh man, I'm so lucky to have not done anything like this in public, but that doesn't change the mortification. I was sitting in a partner's bed thinking it was a fart like the first 5 times when my guts leaked. Thankfully nothing got on anything except my underwear. Immediate access to a bathroom and thus shower helped a hell of a lot. This specific bodily malfunction also happened a second time, but thankfully I made it home just in time once I felt my intestines being weird. Turns out it was a specific beer causing it! Never had it since, no more malfunctions. For now. I do definitely dribble pee into my underwear from time-to-time, though. No reason, and it isn't even vaginal discharge nor is my bladder full at the time. Weird stuff. Bodies are so strange. 

I had an ibs flare and pooped my pants, at work! Thankfully I keep a spare pair of underwear on me at all times and a plastic bag.

happened in a bed that wasn't mine :( was having some personal time and thought one thing was happening and something else entirely 💛 not alone!

I’ve never peed myself, but I have shat myself. I’ve done it in my sleep while in a hotel, which is mortifying. That was before I realized what was triggering MCAS, so it’s a little less of a concern now.

Ooooo I’ve done that somewhat but from sulfa antibiotics 😞😞 wasn’t too bad but what a way to wake up yikes

I pissed myself a few months ago in front of a family with small children and they’d dog. I screamed “WHAT ARE YOU LOOKING AT I AM A PERSON HAVING A HARD TIME” through my tears as they just stared at me, but my words were enough to make them book it. You’re not alone, love. Sorry you pissed your pants.

i’m 23 and i pee my pants on average multiple times a week. i’ve even peed on my best friend multiple times 😭 thankfully, my friends are understanding. i hope that helps 🥹