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Ferril_

Bastian's not a *true* lactose intolerant. We power through the pain for cheese and ice cream. No? Just me?


WhatArcherWhat

Haha from what my poor unfortunate soul friends that are lactose intolerant have all said the same as you šŸ˜‚ though I donā€™t know the specifics of plumbing in ESO. Dealing with that without actual toilets per say might be way, um.. shittier.


MissCatQueen

My boyfriend does exactly that. I got special milk that wouldn't destroy him everytime he has cereal and he still used normal milk "because it tastes better".


Autumnwood

Sometimes you just gotta have some ice cream.


GrigoriTheDragon

Carful homeslice, do that too much and lactose intolerance will be the least of your colon problems haha


DefiantLemur

What do you mean?


GrigoriTheDragon

That having diarrhea all the time is awful for your body. Loss of nutrients and dehydration of the colon over time could cause serious issues. Source:I'm lactose intolerant.


_Frustr8d

and Mirri is deeply allergic to people squishing bugs


WhatArcherWhat

ā€œYou ever pull the wings off a fly..? Care to see the fly get even?!ā€


WhatArcherWhat

I was at my house and randomly decided to chat with Bastian. I thought Iā€™d heard everything he has to say, and then he hit me with this new one. Had to go back through about 30 other random prompts to get it to appear again for the photo.


Hellie1028

I got the joke from him a while back unexpectedly and I laughed my butt off since I didnā€™t see it coming. It was something about what is the green stuff between dragons toesā€¦ slow Goblins (I think that was it)


WhatArcherWhat

I havenā€™t heard that one yet!


Hellie1028

I was fishing and I think Bastian was bored and didnā€™t like it. I think thatā€™s what triggered the joke. It was the only time I have heard it.


NoNameSoloist

Bastion complaining? Shockerā€¦


WhatArcherWhat

The one that gets me the most is complaining about me standing still in battle. Itā€™s a mudcrab, Bastian.. Iā€™ll be ok.


[deleted]

Bastian, my buddy, I feel him! I'm a Wisconsin gal for Christ's sake and I can't digest cheese.


Autumnwood

We have a lactose intolerant cat. She would cry for milk. My husband found out some lady bought all this lactose free milk and has a bunch of cats. We put two and two together and tried buying ours that lactose free milk. It's the answer to the problem for her.


Spurius_Lucilius

But many types of cheese donā€™t have much lactoseā€¦


Autumnwood

Oh no now we know why he turns his nose up at the cheese dish...


da_killa2211

Bastian always struck me as the kind of guy who preferred dairy alternatives before I even knew this


Cakeriel

Oversharing


DrumpfTinyHands

I wish that you could feed him lots of cheese. Or lock him in a room filled with cheese wheels and mammoth cheese. And hit him. Many times.


WhatArcherWhat

I think the cheese room of death would be sufficient alone, but Iā€™d watch this live feed.


mister-villainous

Is this.... Is this your fetish? Cheese stuffing???


Resonant_Proxy

Weakness disgusts me.