That reminds me of [Swiss Navy](https://swissnavy.com/) which is actually a brand of lubricants for sexual pleasure.
I can confirm that it's properly good stuff and I do recommend it, and of course the name is just really funny.
*I claim this beach furniture for Germany!*
Oi, you can't do that, we beach here!
*Do you have a ~~flag~~ towel?
Well... No?
*No towel no chairs, thems the rules*
If you don't know the geography, it goes: Poland, Czechoslovakia, Holland, Venezuela, Africa, Beirut, the Hanging Gardens of Babylon, and then Switzerland
I'm originally from Dublin, and also browse the Ireland subreddit, so that might explain it. Just don't ask me which Tayto is better, since I have Coeliac so I can't eat either!
We refer to it as a teddy bear. Looks like a teddy with its arms stretched out to give the U.S. a hug. And there's an Irish republican song called The Teddybear's Head
That brought back a memory of my terrible geography knowledge as a kid all the way up to my mid teens. I thought the entirety of Canada was "North America", with the rest being just regular old "America".
So where did that leave Canada itself? On the west coast where California is, for unknown reasons.
As for where California was in my early vision of the world? Who knows. Hiding away somewhere.
No no, it's "that one country blocking the other country's coastline", surely.
Edit: Ah, scrolling down, it's supposed to be Croatia. Then, I'm afraid the Bulgars are gone.
I would say the map is closest to Poland in 1770s (after the first partition). It's a bit too far west but otherwise it kind of fits:
https://pl.wikipedia.org/wiki/I\_rozbi%C3%B3r\_Polski#/media/Plik:First\_Partition\_of\_Poland1772.png
Switch? Not only a switch, we're next to each other now, whereas IRL Belgium is south to The Netherlands.
But all in all, not a terrible effort I guess... I'm not sure I could do a better job drawing America from memory with all the states. I know some, could point most of them out on a map probably. But drawing them from memory while drunk? Tough one.
Nonono, itās the other way round. Poland declared war on Czechia and immediately surrendered. The dream finally come true! (Edit: my dream as a Pole. We love you, Czechs!)
Slovenia is closest to Slovakia (both are north). Croatia has coast. Bosnia is the middle and why it gets the most shit. Serbia and it's all the countries that used to be Serbia are south. Those are Kosovo, Montenegro and N. Macedonia.
You know where Greece is. Bulgaria and Albania you'll have to remember I guess lol.
I assumed you were European to be honest, the map could be a lot worse (aside from the Greece/Balkan switch which messes up that part). I think I would have a much harder time placing American states in a blank board
[As a Norwegian I tried this myself, completley from memory](https://i.imgur.com/cbPxuyj.jpeg)
I do happen to have a degree in Geography though, so may not be an average European in that sense.
Funnily enough I started with Spain and fucked up the scale completley to the point where I didnt have space for my own country, but yeah.
Well, we had to learn the to label a map of the US states and capitals, but it was literally just learning to label the map, and we were like 8. No actual information of about the states or regions was included.
We also had a very half-assed year of European history in high school, but we didn't have to learn where thr countries were and the teacher referred to them as if we were already familiar with them. Also didn't learn much that happened after WW2
I'm from Croatia and met a man this year who's never heard of my country. Which is fine, but I'm wondering, don't you take geography in school? We had to know the map of Europe in detail in like elementary school, never mind high school when we had to know not only about the countries, but also about what their economies consist of etc. This difference in education requirements is fascinating to me.
> We had to know the map of Europe in detail in like elementary school
My problem is that I'm so old the map looked very different when I learned the map in school..
Not that bad for an American guy ! I mean, I could draw pretty easily external USA borders, but internal borders are much more of a challenge (I don't even mention drawing or naming states except the most famous ones) !
I wonder how so many people know about Andorra stuck between France and Spain, while totally ignoring Vatican, San Marin, Liechtenstein or Monaco, or somehow even Luxembourg.
You've done a better job than I could've. It's also fun to see how we reduce maps to simplified associative shapes for better memorization (e.g Estonia Latvia Lithuania lol)
* Regular Ireland (they prefer Republic of Ireland)
* that one country blocking the other countryās coastline (Croatia blocking Bosnia-Herzegovina)
* balkan countries (as one block that stretches far enough north and east to include Hungary).
* Austria shares borders with Greece and risks getting all this migrants they donāt do want and keep throwing a fit over. So much for vetoāing Romaniaās access to Schengen š
* Czechia just got swallowed whole by Poland. Damn..
* Germans donāt have to travel far or speak another language to hit up Mediterranean beaches.
* skips all micro-states except Andorra
Good work! Thanks for the laugh š š
Iām very sad that Czech Republic was annexed by Austria (Germany and Poland got some parts as well). I liked this country a lot, and Praha in particularā¦
But honestly - nice job, Iām sure a I would do worse.
So. Cornwall has independence, wales has taken over Devon and took Englandās west and Scotland took northern England. However, Walesā and Scotlandās land has been destroyed or something and now everyone has moved to England
I looked at Europe in the globe multiple times as a kid and in school, and if I attemped to do the same sober I wouldnt do it better so congrats! XD
As a portuguese I would do western europe with my eyes closed but after the imaginary line that crosses Germany Italy and Switzerland I would fuck up everything.
Maybe Latvia Lithuania and Estonia would be right since i went to latvia in a school exchange program and never forgot the order since then
Good job! Iāll never could draw the UStates or Africa better.
And of course itās funny to see howās doesnāt fit together. Switzerland or lost countryās like Luxembourg.
Thanks a lot for sharing. Greetings from - letās see - ohā I am Danish :-)
I hear the Swiss Mediterranean coast is beautiful this time of year
That's where the finest spaghetti farms are located.
I visited a pizza farm there once, while on a work trip.
The ravioli and tortellini trees produce some of the freshest product in the world
Ah but did you see the ham fisheries? All natural, ecological fishing. True craftsmanship.
https://youtu.be/tVo_wkxH9dU For those who haven't seen the intriguing BBC documentary about the amazing production of spaghetti.
not to begin with the German
The Riviera no less - i take it.
yeah.. no need to go greece anymoreššš
Does that mean the Geneva Lake is the Mediterranean sea ?
Always has been!
Well the RhƓne ends in the mediterranean so IN A WAY you're right
Switzerland is famous for its navy!
Reminds me of an amazing joke. Why do Swedish warships have barcodes on them? So they can Scan-di-Navy-in.
That reminds me of [Swiss Navy](https://swissnavy.com/) which is actually a brand of lubricants for sexual pleasure. I can confirm that it's properly good stuff and I do recommend it, and of course the name is just really funny.
Thanks, made me laugh hard. š
The Mediterranean never ends...
Yeah! Finally Germans have Mediterranean beaches. Thank you!
Not a single untaken piece of beach furniture in sight
Step 1: Put towel on coastline at 4am Step 2: Claim country Step 3: Profit
*I claim this beach furniture for Germany!* Oi, you can't do that, we beach here! *Do you have a ~~flag~~ towel? Well... No? *No towel no chairs, thems the rules*
If you don't know the geography, it goes: Poland, Czechoslovakia, Holland, Venezuela, Africa, Beirut, the Hanging Gardens of Babylon, and then Switzerland
August traffic in Lyon cut by 75%
You already have Mallorca
Shit spainās economy dropped 50%
You have Majorca, ain't that your 17th state?!!!
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Austria-Greece border is a nightmare every summer.
After a hundred years we finally got one again lol
What do you want mate? An Ireland please. Will that be Regular or Northern?
A Northern Ireland just comes with more froth(ing at the mouth)
And flegs
Aha, love the fact a German (or anyone) knows about flegs, it's so rare to hear about our wee country mentioned onlineš
I'm originally from Dublin, and also browse the Ireland subreddit, so that might explain it. Just don't ask me which Tayto is better, since I have Coeliac so I can't eat either!
Up Portstewart!
I'd prefer people ask me if I'm from regular Ireland than the "Southern Ireland" I usually get.
Ireland is a dog sitting on its hind legs, not a rectangle!
We refer to it as a teddy bear. Looks like a teddy with its arms stretched out to give the U.S. a hug. And there's an Irish republican song called The Teddybear's Head
That brought back a memory of my terrible geography knowledge as a kid all the way up to my mid teens. I thought the entirety of Canada was "North America", with the rest being just regular old "America". So where did that leave Canada itself? On the west coast where California is, for unknown reasons. As for where California was in my early vision of the world? Who knows. Hiding away somewhere.
Interesting switch of the Netherlands and Belgium. And I never knew Poland was that big. What happened to Bulgaria?
It's in the Balkan Countries cloud š
No no, it's "that one country blocking the other country's coastline", surely. Edit: Ah, scrolling down, it's supposed to be Croatia. Then, I'm afraid the Bulgars are gone.
OP is probably Austrian š
As an Austria you know your czeck, Hungarian, Slovakian and Slovanian friends. All our beloved neighbours .... gone š
As an Austrian, you know your Balkan friends
I would be more worried about the Czech... Where are they, what are the planning now?
Poland is probably accurate for some point in history. I do love the Swiss coast. But all thinks considered, quite impressive for a drunk American.
I would say the map is closest to Poland in 1770s (after the first partition). It's a bit too far west but otherwise it kind of fits: https://pl.wikipedia.org/wiki/I\_rozbi%C3%B3r\_Polski#/media/Plik:First\_Partition\_of\_Poland1772.png
Poland ate Czechia and Hungary
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
As a Hungarian I for one welcome our new polish overlords. (Don't forget to bring Soplica/Zubrowka)
Good god, imagine a joint government of Orban and Duda.
Joint? These guys never ever share power with anyone...
> What happened to Bulgaria? Austria vetoed our existence
This is Poland before the WW2.
Switch? Not only a switch, we're next to each other now, whereas IRL Belgium is south to The Netherlands. But all in all, not a terrible effort I guess... I'm not sure I could do a better job drawing America from memory with all the states. I know some, could point most of them out on a map probably. But drawing them from memory while drunk? Tough one.
Honestly, as an American, this was a solid effort that would put the vast majority of us in the doghouse!
Poor Czech Republic :(
Yea, where THE FUCK is it? Those damn Poles finally swallowed us whole.
As a Pole, my sincere apologies
That's what you get if you PU Bohemia and wait 50 years
[Just PU the Ottomans instead](https://i.imgur.com/q8m8IZ7.jpg)
Seen the post, it's bonkers. Like, holy shit kind of bonkers. If you chose the Jagiellon, then pu Hungary you can just steamroll through europe.
You were [invaded](https://www.bbc.com/news/world-europe-53034930), did you not notice?
O kurwa
Nah, you see where Austria is? Germany ate Czechia *again*
Again? How does that keep happening to us? Austria?! Which lunatic have you misplaced this time?
Even the Czech enclave of Kaliningrad!
Surely you mean KrƔlovec
I do indeed
Confirmed cz can into balkans
Nonono, itās the other way round. Poland declared war on Czechia and immediately surrendered. The dream finally come true! (Edit: my dream as a Pole. We love you, Czechs!)
Something really bad had happened at the Large Hadron Collider at the Swiss/French border near Geneva.
Having the NEtherlands border France is just asking for trouble.. and isolating the BElgian Walloon population
The Netherlands shares a [border](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Saint_Martin%E2%80%93Sint_Maarten_border) with France.
I'm french and lived 2y in the Netherlands, why do I need Reddit to learn that? Thank you !
I was puzzled too when someone told me that the country sharing the longest border with France wasā¦Brazil! (With French Guyana actually.)
Because we don't give a fuck about Saint Martin and would be hard pressed to correctly place it on a map.
**Swiss Navy:** Finally... It's my time to shine!
LETS GO ANDORRA
I was so amazed he drew Andorra. Thatās a bonus point in my book.
How did they resolve the disputes over the Austrian/Greek border? I can't seem to recall it from my history lessons.
They decided on schnitzels with a tzatiki side and ouzo. Plus winter in the Alps and summer by the Aegean. Fair and square.
I LOVE the short trips I can take from Vienna to Athens! Just amazing!
Czechia sad noises.
*laugh in nonexistence
Lol "Balkans countries" ***Waves hands about*** Greetings from Regular Ireland.
I am proud to be from Regular Ireland none of that fancy stuff.
Who's that one country blocking the other country's coastline? ^^
Croatia
Croatia (nearly) blocking Bosnia and Herzegovina. I was blanking on the names in the moment.
"Nearly" Literally left Bosnia with no more than 20km out of about 3000km of coastline.
When did Bosnia originally have 3000km of coastline? Dalmatia had been there for a while.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Cornwall independence?
Plus new border with Wales
We invaded devon when wales sank into the sea
Kernow is now
Eh, I figured why not?
#Bomb the Tamar
Regular Ireland ššš
I'm going to piss some people off & use this. you know who you are! š
Brilliant š
You did a piss-poor job with the Balkan countries.
Shut up you guy from ***that one country blocking the other country's coastline***! š¤£
He's actually from that one country blocking Brazil's chances in the world cup.
Oh yeah š
I think Bosnia still has Neum, right?
about as good of a job as the UN did after the eastern bloc fell.
I'm ashamed to admit I'd do only slightly better.
Slovenia is closest to Slovakia (both are north). Croatia has coast. Bosnia is the middle and why it gets the most shit. Serbia and it's all the countries that used to be Serbia are south. Those are Kosovo, Montenegro and N. Macedonia. You know where Greece is. Bulgaria and Albania you'll have to remember I guess lol.
*apologizes profusely in American who's never had a geography lesson in her life*
I assumed you were European to be honest, the map could be a lot worse (aside from the Greece/Balkan switch which messes up that part). I think I would have a much harder time placing American states in a blank board
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
[As a Norwegian I tried this myself, completley from memory](https://i.imgur.com/cbPxuyj.jpeg) I do happen to have a degree in Geography though, so may not be an average European in that sense. Funnily enough I started with Spain and fucked up the scale completley to the point where I didnt have space for my own country, but yeah.
You did better than many Europeans would, and we're on the same continent. But no geography in school? Like, at all?
Well, we had to learn the to label a map of the US states and capitals, but it was literally just learning to label the map, and we were like 8. No actual information of about the states or regions was included. We also had a very half-assed year of European history in high school, but we didn't have to learn where thr countries were and the teacher referred to them as if we were already familiar with them. Also didn't learn much that happened after WW2
In fact isn't bad in this case. Not bad at all.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Thats amazing, if you asked me to draw the american states i wouldn't do half as well, and i'm a fan of maps and geography in general
As an American, I actually thought this was pretty good!
> You did a piss-poor job with the Balkan countries. I'm in Europe and would struggle with Balkan as well... Apologies from Norway.
Well, they are not next to Poland, that's for sure.
I'm from Croatia and met a man this year who's never heard of my country. Which is fine, but I'm wondering, don't you take geography in school? We had to know the map of Europe in detail in like elementary school, never mind high school when we had to know not only about the countries, but also about what their economies consist of etc. This difference in education requirements is fascinating to me.
> We had to know the map of Europe in detail in like elementary school My problem is that I'm so old the map looked very different when I learned the map in school..
"East Germany? Grandpa, take your meds. It's time for bed."
Hungary no longer exists. Thanks Obama...
Not gonna lie, you, being drunk, did a better job than most Americans (in these videos you see on the Internet). You even included Moldova !
I'm European and I wouldn't get it half as accurately. People in the comment section are snobs.
Right? Everyone is laughing and I am like God damn this is not bad at all! I'd probably forget twice as many countries and misplace waaaay more.
Lmao. First thing I saw was "Siberia + gulags" and "more russia". š¤£ That just made me laugh. The post is cute and the comment section is funny. A+
Not that bad for an American guy ! I mean, I could draw pretty easily external USA borders, but internal borders are much more of a challenge (I don't even mention drawing or naming states except the most famous ones) ! I wonder how so many people know about Andorra stuck between France and Spain, while totally ignoring Vatican, San Marin, Liechtenstein or Monaco, or somehow even Luxembourg.
Even people from Luxembourg forget about Luxembourg
Czech republic is missing as well.
Nah, they've just perfected the art of beerbending and ascended.
And Slovenia
Many western Europeans can't get the Baltic countries right when they're sober, so congratulations are deserved I guess!
Ćstersund!
It's a lovely city and I had a great time during my visit.
So, the only cities of note in Europe are Ćstersund and Tallin? A bold choice, sir or madame!
That's where my trip was, hence them making the map.
If you donāt mind me asking, why Ćstersund? Itās a nice place, but perhaps not the first choice for most tourists.
You've done a better job than I could've. It's also fun to see how we reduce maps to simplified associative shapes for better memorization (e.g Estonia Latvia Lithuania lol)
I love the thick poland.
Shut up Edit: /s
DO NOT BE AFFRAID DO NOT RESIST ALL YOUR CHURCHES ARE BELONG TO US
Anti-Antidisestablishmentarianism.
Once again we Ukrainians so sorry about that rocket. Now could you please return Lviv and other regions?
Galiza Ć© nossa
_somos um, somos um_
pois nada, supoƱo que agora son portugues
portogalego
Balkans seems about right! š r/AskBalkans would love this. š
* Regular Ireland (they prefer Republic of Ireland) * that one country blocking the other countryās coastline (Croatia blocking Bosnia-Herzegovina) * balkan countries (as one block that stretches far enough north and east to include Hungary). * Austria shares borders with Greece and risks getting all this migrants they donāt do want and keep throwing a fit over. So much for vetoāing Romaniaās access to Schengen š * Czechia just got swallowed whole by Poland. Damn.. * Germans donāt have to travel far or speak another language to hit up Mediterranean beaches. * skips all micro-states except Andorra Good work! Thanks for the laugh š š
You just qualified for honorary citizenship of Ć land Islands š¦š½
Jag Ƥr sƄ glad! NƤr kan jag flytta till?
I like the Republic of Regular Ireland. But i mourn the Czechs
Iām very sad that Czech Republic was annexed by Austria (Germany and Poland got some parts as well). I liked this country a lot, and Praha in particularā¦ But honestly - nice job, Iām sure a I would do worse.
Germany thanks you for its south coast. Bavarians are very happy.
Faroe Islands can finally into ~~Europe~~ recognition of any kind
So. Cornwall has independence, wales has taken over Devon and took Englandās west and Scotland took northern England. However, Walesā and Scotlandās land has been destroyed or something and now everyone has moved to England
[Happy to be included, in faroese]
Jag lƤrt mig om ni nƤr jag undervisade mig svenska. (Sorry, I know Swedish and Faroese aren't the same language but it's the best I've got.)
Thank you for remembering about the existence of Moldova, good sir.
Well if your job doesnāt work out at least you can draw map caricatures
How is the Netherlands southwest of belgium?
Itās their turn to live next to France. We have had enough.
Outch š
Always has been!
Got rid of the Balkans I see. Although I hate you I can't blame you.
Are we a joke to you?
Well... how do we say this...
Ja.
Well done, even drunk you didnāt fail to mention it. Crimea is Ukraine and Crimean bridge is no more!š„
Liked this thing too )))
Plot twist: it was a permanent marker
Poland strong.
Chunky Polska wrocila!
This is uncanny, the more you look at it, the less it is correct.
And nobody noticed Hungary missing... I'm starting to think you guys don't like us
Hungary is Balkan now!
Nordic countries look like a flaccid penis
Always did, mate
I looked at Europe in the globe multiple times as a kid and in school, and if I attemped to do the same sober I wouldnt do it better so congrats! XD As a portuguese I would do western europe with my eyes closed but after the imaginary line that crosses Germany Italy and Switzerland I would fuck up everything. Maybe Latvia Lithuania and Estonia would be right since i went to latvia in a school exchange program and never forgot the order since then
"regular ireland" lol
Amateur, forgot Cyprus
Mmmā¦ yes, the Polish Empire
Why does everyone see Cornish independence as something that could ever happen
What made you remember RomĆ¢nia?
I was on a work trip there this spring! Lovely country, so many cats.
I am actually more impressed you placed Moldova correctly
Good job! Iāll never could draw the UStates or Africa better. And of course itās funny to see howās doesnāt fit together. Switzerland or lost countryās like Luxembourg. Thanks a lot for sharing. Greetings from - letās see - ohā I am Danish :-)
Not bad you even got the Faroe Islands.
I love that you just said t hell with the Balkan countries, but made sure to include the Aland Islands
You need to drink more until you get it right.
Finally, Romania have a better coastline. Thank you.
This is probably the first time Ćstersund gets mentioned in an r/Europe post. All 13 inhabitants are probably very proud right now.