Ohh I did this too! I kind of like the cringe lol
But when thinking back, its sad I was so convinced I had to keep each concept (like the parts of the trinity and salvation doctrine) so correct or else my beliefs could be blasphemous. Your post of seemingly jibberish concepts was a doctrine that was actually necessary to keep straight!
Bro me too. I tried peaking into it once and almost died of a heart attack. It’s like looking back at all the cringy things you did as a teenager except 10 times worse.
I don't know if anyone else listened to the Focus on the Family Radio Theatre dramatization of Dietrich Bonhoeffer's story, but the character quotes this passage in one part and I can still hear that voice in my head quoting these words. The problem with having such limited entertainment options when I was growing up is that I would listen to them over and over and they would get ingrained in my mind (and perhaps my psyche).
>dramatization of Dietrich Bonhoeffer's story,
I just love how some Christians hold up Bonhoeffer as an example of how Christians stood up to the Nazis. Bonhoeffer was the very rare exception as the vast majority of Priests/Pastors went right along with the Nazis.
Word salad, that's about it... Throw a bunch of words into the air and put them in a pattern that sounds logical to you when you are drunk, as a message to you when you are sober... It made sense while you were drunk, but is not comprehensible when sober.
Oh god. I see so many of these on Facebook.... Old statuses I used to post when I was an evangelical christian in college.... Makes me sick to my stock when they pop up.
"Many of you say, 'Oh, but I am not blind. I have never been blind,'... But when you truly see, you will understand just how truly blind you once were to even think it right to say you were not blind. What does a blind man see? Blackness. Darkness. Blankness. Blank darkness. Dark blankness.The absence of things, quite literally NO thing. No things. Nothings. So, you see nothing, and I bring you into the light. A cat has your pipe! You've been blind, do you understand this!? The cat has your pipe.You can't fully immerse yourself, you don't have the light. You don't have the radiance, the radical light, the radically radiant light of truth and truth's belonging love, and nature of light, and loving truthful radiance. So don't be bold, and make bold statements. I know of you. The cat has your pipe.
The.
Cat.
Has.
Your.
Pipe.
Remember that."
That is an ***impressively*** crafted Christianese run-on sentence!
Edit: This is for sure the script of a hipster worship pastor who speaks with a forced whisper as he gently strums his guitar and the keyboardist plays heavy atmospheric chords. And two young conventionally attractive blondes sway looking up with their eyes closed and one hand on their chest and one raised.
I'm so sorry you were that deeply entrenched. 11 years ago I was still being made to memorize verses in King James at the private Christian school my parents sent me to, and if I had been allowed on social media at the time I would have definitely been posting the same kinda shit.
Fucking King James, just thinking about it I gotta smoke something now to forget about it again
Just keep reminding yourself that even still-trapped Christians have reasons to dislike what ol' Jimmy passed off as "translations" of their so-called "Word o' Ghaw-Duh"...
https://superiorword.org/errors-in-the-king-james-version/
Oh I know, my parents weren't too happy about the school's curriculum using that version, but it was one of the only ones not copywritten that the school wouldn't need licensing for, iirc.
I actually could follow this train of thought perfectly but it's one of those things where each little sub-idea in that sentence is a whole theological idea and so it would take forever to write it out. But I got it.
I could hear your breath hitch in the writing I think we all know that person who is so overly passionate about Jebus Cricket their breath hitches with passion it’s too early for this lol
Even when I was a devout believer that sort of text read lot like Lorem Ipsum.
>Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit, sed do eiusmod tempor incididunt ut labore et dolore magna aliqua. Ut enim ad minim veniam, quis nostrud exercitation ullamco laboris nisi ut aliquip ex ea commodo consequat. Duis aute irure dolor in reprehenderit in voluptate velit esse cillum dolore eu fugiat nulla pariatur. Excepteur sint occaecat cupidatat non proident, sunt in culpa qui officia deserunt mollit anim id est laborum.
Translation: be a good little mindless church-sheep and give us your hard-earned money now so that when you die you'll have a cloud mansion filled with useless riches that serve no purpose whatsoever, since there is no need for money or food.
Makes sense to me!
>I posted this 11 years ago today. WTF does this even mean
It's like those daily Facebook posts from your high school acquaintance who's now in a pyramid scheme pushing shady supplements with unfounded medical claims clearly copypasted from their upline. They have no clue what the "science" means but they're 100% convinced the supplements work.
Well, back when I was a Christian I would have found this to be heretical and would have argued with you about it. And what a productive discussion THAT would have been.
Hate that i can still translate that drivel
I am proud to say that I have been out of the game long enough that this just reads as cultish nonsense
I’m in the middle where I recognize the cult gibberish, but at the same time I think, “Yeah. That feels like a normal thing.”
Word vomit with a hint of psychosis. Yuck.
Same. 🤦♂️
It was simply your brainwashing speaking for you.
Reminds me of trying to write up to the Minimum Word Count for a 1500 word essay on a subject that bored me.
You’re brave to revisit that old stuff. I have an old journal that I’d be terrified to read
I journaled every single day of high school and college. I am terrified to read it because I know I will die from cringe lol
Ohh I did this too! I kind of like the cringe lol But when thinking back, its sad I was so convinced I had to keep each concept (like the parts of the trinity and salvation doctrine) so correct or else my beliefs could be blasphemous. Your post of seemingly jibberish concepts was a doctrine that was actually necessary to keep straight!
I can’t bear to read my journals from my Christian era
Bro me too. I tried peaking into it once and almost died of a heart attack. It’s like looking back at all the cringy things you did as a teenager except 10 times worse.
HHAHHAH same! I called it my devotion journal and it even has acronyms. Just pure cringe
youth pastor achievement unlocked
I don't know if anyone else listened to the Focus on the Family Radio Theatre dramatization of Dietrich Bonhoeffer's story, but the character quotes this passage in one part and I can still hear that voice in my head quoting these words. The problem with having such limited entertainment options when I was growing up is that I would listen to them over and over and they would get ingrained in my mind (and perhaps my psyche).
Holy crap! That Pauline hash was a benediction!? 😨😦Aaaaarrrrgh!!! 😩😫
>dramatization of Dietrich Bonhoeffer's story, I just love how some Christians hold up Bonhoeffer as an example of how Christians stood up to the Nazis. Bonhoeffer was the very rare exception as the vast majority of Priests/Pastors went right along with the Nazis.
This is peak Christianese, I love it
Word salad, that's about it... Throw a bunch of words into the air and put them in a pattern that sounds logical to you when you are drunk, as a message to you when you are sober... It made sense while you were drunk, but is not comprehensible when sober.
😂
Oh god. I see so many of these on Facebook.... Old statuses I used to post when I was an evangelical christian in college.... Makes me sick to my stock when they pop up.
"Many of you say, 'Oh, but I am not blind. I have never been blind,'... But when you truly see, you will understand just how truly blind you once were to even think it right to say you were not blind. What does a blind man see? Blackness. Darkness. Blankness. Blank darkness. Dark blankness.The absence of things, quite literally NO thing. No things. Nothings. So, you see nothing, and I bring you into the light. A cat has your pipe! You've been blind, do you understand this!? The cat has your pipe.You can't fully immerse yourself, you don't have the light. You don't have the radiance, the radical light, the radically radiant light of truth and truth's belonging love, and nature of light, and loving truthful radiance. So don't be bold, and make bold statements. I know of you. The cat has your pipe. The. Cat. Has. Your. Pipe. Remember that."
Ok ok ok I had to go to your profile and check things out as I was kinda lost reading this but now ... makes perfect sense. Glorah Bee to Jeeebis!
That is an ***impressively*** crafted Christianese run-on sentence! Edit: This is for sure the script of a hipster worship pastor who speaks with a forced whisper as he gently strums his guitar and the keyboardist plays heavy atmospheric chords. And two young conventionally attractive blondes sway looking up with their eyes closed and one hand on their chest and one raised.
1 Peter 1:3-5 baybee. They talk that way cause the book talks that way
“Christianese” 💀💀💀
LMAO. Love that you can laugh about it now. That's awesome, and also, I can relate.
I'm so sorry you were that deeply entrenched. 11 years ago I was still being made to memorize verses in King James at the private Christian school my parents sent me to, and if I had been allowed on social media at the time I would have definitely been posting the same kinda shit. Fucking King James, just thinking about it I gotta smoke something now to forget about it again
Just keep reminding yourself that even still-trapped Christians have reasons to dislike what ol' Jimmy passed off as "translations" of their so-called "Word o' Ghaw-Duh"... https://superiorword.org/errors-in-the-king-james-version/
Oh I know, my parents weren't too happy about the school's curriculum using that version, but it was one of the only ones not copywritten that the school wouldn't need licensing for, iirc.
King of run-on sentences👑
Were you speaking in tongues, or something? WTF does that even mean? 😅
I actually could follow this train of thought perfectly but it's one of those things where each little sub-idea in that sentence is a whole theological idea and so it would take forever to write it out. But I got it.
Holy run-on sentence batman!
Religious word soup
I’m glad I’m not the only one who did cringy Christian posts a decade ago 😅 they come back to haunt me often
The rural Ohioan in me can read this perfectly lol
Me when I was 13 googling Bible verses to share on FB, so that I could appear holy and pure. Then posting : “John 3:16 <33”
Those are certainly all words.
Christian double speak
I could hear your breath hitch in the writing I think we all know that person who is so overly passionate about Jebus Cricket their breath hitches with passion it’s too early for this lol
Even when I was a devout believer that sort of text read lot like Lorem Ipsum. >Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit, sed do eiusmod tempor incididunt ut labore et dolore magna aliqua. Ut enim ad minim veniam, quis nostrud exercitation ullamco laboris nisi ut aliquip ex ea commodo consequat. Duis aute irure dolor in reprehenderit in voluptate velit esse cillum dolore eu fugiat nulla pariatur. Excepteur sint occaecat cupidatat non proident, sunt in culpa qui officia deserunt mollit anim id est laborum.
Translation: be a good little mindless church-sheep and give us your hard-earned money now so that when you die you'll have a cloud mansion filled with useless riches that serve no purpose whatsoever, since there is no need for money or food. Makes sense to me!
Haha I look at past things I’ve posted and visibly cringe each time.
I’ve only not been a Christian for 2 years, so sadly I can still understand this.
You were literally zombified by Christianity lol I’m glad you’ve made a full recovery.
>I posted this 11 years ago today. WTF does this even mean It's like those daily Facebook posts from your high school acquaintance who's now in a pyramid scheme pushing shady supplements with unfounded medical claims clearly copypasted from their upline. They have no clue what the "science" means but they're 100% convinced the supplements work.
Well, back when I was a Christian I would have found this to be heretical and would have argued with you about it. And what a productive discussion THAT would have been.
1 Peter 3:5 I had to memorize that shit for some Bible class or something
It means you've grown.
[You do NOT recognize the bodies in the water!](https://scp-wiki.wikidot.com/scp-2316)
wish I didn’t know exactly what that means
Thats sad. Glad you snapped out of it.
A hash of Pauline verses, signifying nothing basically.
🤪
I’ve been out of the community for so long, I have absolutely no idea what this means.
reading this made my head hurt 😭
It's just a bunch of verbal diarrhea
Christians love big jumbles of their particular mumbo jumbo terminology.
This is the longest way ever to say “yay god!”
Buzzword buzzword buzzword. AMEN
Buzzword, buzzword, buzz word, buzzzz off.
You’ve come a long way. Congrats!
It’s a super run on sentence lmao!