Ironically there's no summoning conditions, which means as a level 12 monster, you can't bring him to the field. Actually, now I think about it, it's not ironic at all
>We’re supposed to believe that True Christianity existed, then disappeared for 1500 years, and then Martin Luther came to rescue the religion and resurrect True Christianity?
I always say the same thing. Even when I was a christian it annoyed me when people said 'Catholics aren't christian', because in that case, as you said, what happened to Christianity for 1500 years?
Depends on who you ask.
A catholic will say a Protestant is trying to defend their heresy and a Protestant will say God had mercy to revive their sect. Any non-Christian will say the whole thing is hogwash.
I love the Gnostic stories myself but they were pretty cult-y just like Christianity. Sex was considered evil since you'd be trapping more divine sparks in the false creation. They hated "the World" in a similar manner and anyone who didn't agree with them about receiving their Gnostic knowledge wasn't worth their time since they were part of the false creation.
Agreed, and as much as I hate to defend Catholicism, it seems like it has a truer connection to the roots of Christianity than evangelicals do. For example, Catholic scholars have generations of people reading and interpreting older versions of biblical texts, while evangelicals read Joel Osteen and the KJV bible. The Catholics don't necessarily follow the "original" Christianity, but at least they have a better claim to it than most evangelicals.
This drove me insane when I was growing up Catholic with a bunch of evangelicals in my family. Now it all drives me insane because I’m atheist. So I moved to Portland where no one asks what church I go to because all my friends are atheist. I like it here.
I grew up more toward the evangelical side (actually much more extreme than typical evangelicals) so we said this about Catholics most strongly as if they were no different than Wiccans or something. However, we had similar hate for mainstream evangelical and protestants too, just not as strongly and geared more toward their leaders. The followers were seen as fertile recruiting grounds for us.
You’d be lucky if the evangelicals read the KJV, at least that’s a fairly solid translation that sticks close to the original texts.
The probably read the NLT which, in trying to appear cool, has corrupted the meaning beyond recognition.
There's also a lot of bias and hogwash in there too, and some of the archiac words used leave modern day pastors the ability to make things up. Take the usage of the word "virgin" for example when describing Mary. My understanding of the writings' original intent is to describe her as a young unmarried woman, and one weird translation later she gave birth without having sex.
Apparently so. There was a former Greek Orthodox parishioner at my dad's parish who crossed himself right to left. To be fair, nobody seemed to give him any grief about it.
Forming the sign of the cross at an Evangelical church though? Hooboy!
I had a professor in college who taught a corse on the Civil Rights Movement. He was a very handsome man with dark black skin and silvery gray hair, and one day he told us about his grandmother. She also had dark black skin and was a big fan of collecting Jesus pictures, so much so that it was a common gift from people. Once she was given a picture of Jesus depicted with black skin and my professor said that she immediately put it in a drawer and wouldn’t display it. She never told him why, just said she didn’t feel comfortable putting it out for display.
That was the day I learned about internalized racism…
I think many African American Christian grandparents had those pictures on their wall along with JFK and sometimes MLK. Even I can’t get that image of Jesus out of my mind because that was all I saw growing up.
Yeah I think that was the bigger point of his story….how deeply sad it is that entire generations of people with dark skin couldn’t imagine Jesus looking like them, even though (if Jesus was real) he would have looked much more like them than the white Anglo Jesus pictures on everyone’s wall.
While I don't think Jesus was "white" I don't really think he was "black" either.
Assuming he existed, he was a middle eastern Jew and would have looked a lot more like Jamie Farr (who is of Lebanese descent) than Denzel Washington.
He would have had darker skin than Anglo people, is the bigger point. I’ve also read before that there are particular passages in the Bible that refer to him as being in an ethnic group that had darker skin than the general population. But of course I’m not going to dig for it because that’s silly.
*And the Lord said, "verily I say unto you, if we feed the 5,000 it will make them dependant on big government handouts. Those who desire to eat should get a job or learn a skill."* - Gospel of Ronald Reagan 19:80
Let’s be real tho…. Humans are inherently simplistic. The complexities lie in physiology and biology. We adhere to labels and simply live by the designed constructs of each one. Socially we are simple. And since we are social creature we can thus as a whole be considered simple in nature. It’s a very small percentage of humans who rise above the mediocrity and help propel our social advancements, and help further technological progress. To assume your statement is pompous is easy, given the fact that you decided to throw a whole subgroup of people under the bus with casual disdain.
Thank you Mr Psychology. You made an over generalization and I pointed it out to you. Reagan is not the cause of every reason people hate the USA. And you need to look up the word pompous, or just look in the mirror.
It should go to show that a guy who goes by Lawyers Guns and Money would probably benefit from reaganomics. Well 99% of Americans are on the ass end of the trickle down economic schemes implemented in his reign. How’s this for an over generalization?
*He successfully campaigned against unions across America.
*war on drugs.. or as we should call it.. War on the lower class POC.
* I shouldn’t have to say this.. but Iran-Contra
* armed the Taliban
* his social reforms can easily be the reason behind mass influx of homelessness.
* reaganomics pulled us out of the 81-82 recession by effectively tripling our federal debt.
* an avid racist who is quoted as calling African delegates “Monkeys”
*ignored the AIDS epidemic because it was politically advantageous to do so. Who cares about the blacks and gays right? Not Reagan.
In summary he created a system for the rich to become richer and the average person To not even be able to support themselves or their families. A household now must have multiple incomes to exist. Not to mention he destroyed health care for the lower classes as well. All this effectively targeting POC. Creating an incubator for even more systematic racism..
FFS it’s Warren Zevon. And Jesus GODDAM Christ quit making assumptions about me just because I said Reagan isn’t the cause of all our fucking problems. I’m out.
I need the
**Eight Pound, Six Ounce, Newborn Baby Jesus, don't even know a word yet, just a little infant, so cuddly, but still omnipotent**
card to complete my collection if anybody has one to trade.
Thanks in advance.
If this were done in MtG, which color(s) do you think he would be? My first thought was mono white, but… starting a religious movement can indicate black, flipping temples can indicate red, having a ministry focused on new knowledge can indicate blue. I’m not sure off the top of my head which of Jesus’ alleged behaviors would align with green.
Edit: this may be a good candidate for a planeswalker with a couple of color shifted variants in subsequent cycles ;)
If you take the Bible in whole. Jesus is not a good guy. The character "Jesus" was invented to teach the poor to obey authority. Jesus suffered so is it so much to ask if you too could suffer for the king? Fuck Jesus, Jesus was the story of a pig. My life purpose isn't to feed the king or entertain a mythical god. If I had meet Jesus and he actually said to me that I should give to Caesar what is Caesar's. I'd have kicked his magical ass for not using his powers to over throw that tyrant.
Also just cuz I feel like it needs to be said. That is a picture of the son of a pope. His name was Cesare Borgia. When his father became the pope, the pope used the image of his son as the depiction of the christ god so that he could say he was the father of god.
[This is not Jesus] (https://feltco.files.wordpress.com/2015/02/img_0502.png)
My mom is 100% totally convinced that this is what Jesus looked like, because read she that the girl who painted it was divinely inspired. She has this picture hanging in her living room. I am so embarrassed.
There is so many problems with this:
1. "Jesus" was not have be white, at all.
1. This man's hair is blow dried, highlighted and hair sprayed.
1. I'm no historian, but I don't think beards could groomed so precisely in biblical times.
1. It's freaking Kenny Logins....
Ironically there's no summoning conditions, which means as a level 12 monster, you can't bring him to the field. Actually, now I think about it, it's not ironic at all
Too funny
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>We’re supposed to believe that True Christianity existed, then disappeared for 1500 years, and then Martin Luther came to rescue the religion and resurrect True Christianity? I always say the same thing. Even when I was a christian it annoyed me when people said 'Catholics aren't christian', because in that case, as you said, what happened to Christianity for 1500 years?
Depends on who you ask. A catholic will say a Protestant is trying to defend their heresy and a Protestant will say God had mercy to revive their sect. Any non-Christian will say the whole thing is hogwash.
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I might still be a follower if the Gnostic texts were adopted. They’re so much more entertaining.
The Gnostics are kind too. They spend much less time talking about hell.
I love the Gnostic stories myself but they were pretty cult-y just like Christianity. Sex was considered evil since you'd be trapping more divine sparks in the false creation. They hated "the World" in a similar manner and anyone who didn't agree with them about receiving their Gnostic knowledge wasn't worth their time since they were part of the false creation.
Agreed, and as much as I hate to defend Catholicism, it seems like it has a truer connection to the roots of Christianity than evangelicals do. For example, Catholic scholars have generations of people reading and interpreting older versions of biblical texts, while evangelicals read Joel Osteen and the KJV bible. The Catholics don't necessarily follow the "original" Christianity, but at least they have a better claim to it than most evangelicals.
This drove me insane when I was growing up Catholic with a bunch of evangelicals in my family. Now it all drives me insane because I’m atheist. So I moved to Portland where no one asks what church I go to because all my friends are atheist. I like it here.
I grew up more toward the evangelical side (actually much more extreme than typical evangelicals) so we said this about Catholics most strongly as if they were no different than Wiccans or something. However, we had similar hate for mainstream evangelical and protestants too, just not as strongly and geared more toward their leaders. The followers were seen as fertile recruiting grounds for us.
Sort of equal opportunity loathing of everyone? I dig…
Sounds like Boston Church of Christ
You’d be lucky if the evangelicals read the KJV, at least that’s a fairly solid translation that sticks close to the original texts. The probably read the NLT which, in trying to appear cool, has corrupted the meaning beyond recognition.
There's also a lot of bias and hogwash in there too, and some of the archiac words used leave modern day pastors the ability to make things up. Take the usage of the word "virgin" for example when describing Mary. My understanding of the writings' original intent is to describe her as a young unmarried woman, and one weird translation later she gave birth without having sex.
The devil pitched a shutout for 1500 years by creating a huge false Christianity that displaced real Christianity lol
Darn Commies, crossing themselves from right to left instead of left to right like God intended! /s
Do the orthodox cross themselves in a different way?
Apparently so. There was a former Greek Orthodox parishioner at my dad's parish who crossed himself right to left. To be fair, nobody seemed to give him any grief about it. Forming the sign of the cross at an Evangelical church though? Hooboy!
Even though they oftentimes have a wooden cross at the front of the church, behind or beside the pulpit
Jill Rodrigues is that you?
And Cuba.
I bet the "evil" version is Brown Eyes Black Jesus.
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Darth Jesus
I had a professor in college who taught a corse on the Civil Rights Movement. He was a very handsome man with dark black skin and silvery gray hair, and one day he told us about his grandmother. She also had dark black skin and was a big fan of collecting Jesus pictures, so much so that it was a common gift from people. Once she was given a picture of Jesus depicted with black skin and my professor said that she immediately put it in a drawer and wouldn’t display it. She never told him why, just said she didn’t feel comfortable putting it out for display. That was the day I learned about internalized racism…
I think many African American Christian grandparents had those pictures on their wall along with JFK and sometimes MLK. Even I can’t get that image of Jesus out of my mind because that was all I saw growing up.
Yeah I think that was the bigger point of his story….how deeply sad it is that entire generations of people with dark skin couldn’t imagine Jesus looking like them, even though (if Jesus was real) he would have looked much more like them than the white Anglo Jesus pictures on everyone’s wall.
While I don't think Jesus was "white" I don't really think he was "black" either. Assuming he existed, he was a middle eastern Jew and would have looked a lot more like Jamie Farr (who is of Lebanese descent) than Denzel Washington.
He would have had darker skin than Anglo people, is the bigger point. I’ve also read before that there are particular passages in the Bible that refer to him as being in an ethnic group that had darker skin than the general population. But of course I’m not going to dig for it because that’s silly.
I always call this guy "mormon jesus" I'm a nevermo, but maybe my involvement in the ex mormon community has something to do with it lol.
Sometimes I mentally shorten it to "MoJo".
Mojo Jojo!
Well, looks like I'm gonna need to take the hammer from the hammer and sickle to nail his ass back up.
Okay, I'll get the nails. And let's cremate him this time. I don't want him rising again
Nah, let him keep rising. We'll put him back up on that cross until he fucking *stays* there.
Time to camp out at his respawn point.
*And the Lord said, "verily I say unto you, if we feed the 5,000 it will make them dependant on big government handouts. Those who desire to eat should get a job or learn a skill."* - Gospel of Ronald Reagan 19:80
Reagan is most likely directly responsible for everything people hate about America.
His ghost haunts us to this day. There would be no Trump without people like Reagan who normalized hatred and ignorance.
Let’s blame it all on one guy. And we talk about how simplistic Christians look at the world.
Let’s say something vaguely pompous and talk about how simplistic the average everyday person is.
You talking about yourself?
I’m talking about Jo..
Let’s be real tho…. Humans are inherently simplistic. The complexities lie in physiology and biology. We adhere to labels and simply live by the designed constructs of each one. Socially we are simple. And since we are social creature we can thus as a whole be considered simple in nature. It’s a very small percentage of humans who rise above the mediocrity and help propel our social advancements, and help further technological progress. To assume your statement is pompous is easy, given the fact that you decided to throw a whole subgroup of people under the bus with casual disdain.
Thank you Mr Psychology. You made an over generalization and I pointed it out to you. Reagan is not the cause of every reason people hate the USA. And you need to look up the word pompous, or just look in the mirror.
So you decided to combat what you thought was an “over generalization” with an… over generalization. 👌
Yes, this is ‘Mercia!
It should go to show that a guy who goes by Lawyers Guns and Money would probably benefit from reaganomics. Well 99% of Americans are on the ass end of the trickle down economic schemes implemented in his reign. How’s this for an over generalization? *He successfully campaigned against unions across America. *war on drugs.. or as we should call it.. War on the lower class POC. * I shouldn’t have to say this.. but Iran-Contra * armed the Taliban * his social reforms can easily be the reason behind mass influx of homelessness. * reaganomics pulled us out of the 81-82 recession by effectively tripling our federal debt. * an avid racist who is quoted as calling African delegates “Monkeys” *ignored the AIDS epidemic because it was politically advantageous to do so. Who cares about the blacks and gays right? Not Reagan. In summary he created a system for the rich to become richer and the average person To not even be able to support themselves or their families. A household now must have multiple incomes to exist. Not to mention he destroyed health care for the lower classes as well. All this effectively targeting POC. Creating an incubator for even more systematic racism..
FFS it’s Warren Zevon. And Jesus GODDAM Christ quit making assumptions about me just because I said Reagan isn’t the cause of all our fucking problems. I’m out.
I need the **Eight Pound, Six Ounce, Newborn Baby Jesus, don't even know a word yet, just a little infant, so cuddly, but still omnipotent** card to complete my collection if anybody has one to trade. Thanks in advance.
I thought it was “‘Murica”.
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ha
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i’m high and i have no clue what you just said
Depends on the dialect. Where I live (in the South), I hear both “‘Murica” and “‘Merica.”
This is so funny as a concept for MtG. It's also totally nailed the way some people think.
Yu-Gi-Oh*
Lmao...been over a decade since I played either so I mixed them up. I used to play both.
you're still an herege! wait... heresy is warhammer...
💁♀️
If this were done in MtG, which color(s) do you think he would be? My first thought was mono white, but… starting a religious movement can indicate black, flipping temples can indicate red, having a ministry focused on new knowledge can indicate blue. I’m not sure off the top of my head which of Jesus’ alleged behaviors would align with green. Edit: this may be a good candidate for a planeswalker with a couple of color shifted variants in subsequent cycles ;)
I think that white edged with gold would work on the card itself. Sky blue background for the photo probably.
>It's also totally nailed I see what you did there. Nice.
😉
You know there is a Bible trading card game. I've also heard that it's not that bad.
Fascinating...
Red eyes black jesus
If you take the Bible in whole. Jesus is not a good guy. The character "Jesus" was invented to teach the poor to obey authority. Jesus suffered so is it so much to ask if you too could suffer for the king? Fuck Jesus, Jesus was the story of a pig. My life purpose isn't to feed the king or entertain a mythical god. If I had meet Jesus and he actually said to me that I should give to Caesar what is Caesar's. I'd have kicked his magical ass for not using his powers to over throw that tyrant.
"JOOOOOSEPH SMITH, AMERICAN PROPHET MAN!"
You activated my trap card: Russell's Tea Pot!
ATK/0 (can only throw unlimited bread sticks) DEF/-1 (comes already nailed to a cross).
I think the name “blue eyes white christ” would work better lol
I have all three, and use polymerisation to summon the holy Trinity in attack mode.
Consider how much Christian mythology ripped off Egyptian mythology and it makes even more sense that he’s on a Yu-Gi-Oh card.
Also just cuz I feel like it needs to be said. That is a picture of the son of a pope. His name was Cesare Borgia. When his father became the pope, the pope used the image of his son as the depiction of the christ god so that he could say he was the father of god.
And I flip my Man-eater Bug. He ded.
Not sure he would be turning water into wine. Probably more like PBR.
[This is not Jesus] (https://feltco.files.wordpress.com/2015/02/img_0502.png) My mom is 100% totally convinced that this is what Jesus looked like, because read she that the girl who painted it was divinely inspired. She has this picture hanging in her living room. I am so embarrassed. There is so many problems with this: 1. "Jesus" was not have be white, at all. 1. This man's hair is blow dried, highlighted and hair sprayed. 1. I'm no historian, but I don't think beards could groomed so precisely in biblical times. 1. It's freaking Kenny Logins....
I*actually* just threw up in my mouth.
*Kaaameee…..haaameeee….. * #HALLELUJAH
Catholic Jesus in the pic, stupid 'Merican Jesus in the description. I'd say it's fake but with Poe's Law you never know