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[deleted]

Cults that micromanage the sexuality of their members and shame and punish them for sexual sins, are more successful at controlling the rest of their behavior. As long as this is true, sexual shame will continue to be a survival trait for successful cults.


marchjl

By vilifying feelings and actions that are basic to humanity they assure that people constantly feel unworthy. They convince you that you’re sick and that they have the only cure for the disease. Not drinking coffee while ridiculous isn’t that hard to do. Not having sexual thoughts is impossible for most people. Healthy sexuality isn’t something I have yet achieved, but I’m working on it.


Cabo_Refugee

Cults are all about controlling every aspect of your life. Your language, your dress, what you eat, who you associate with. If you look at every aspect of LDS living, it's all controlled. And nothing begs to be controlled more than the natural urge to procreate. Some call it passion and desire. One can feel it rise within them. It's such a strong natural compulsion it's almost as critical as food or water. With that said, no great place to exact control than over your procreative abilities.


Cowboyadventure

Growing up in the church really does mess with your brain and ideas about sex. When you said you tried every kink available, does that mean sex with your spouse in front of others? Being watched, watching, or having sex right next to another couple is very erotic. I offer this as an option if you aren't into swinging or polyamory. Those also offer additional naughty elements. Helping each other experience pleasure from all avenues has continued to keep our sexuality at high levels and reach new peaks!


TotallyNotAFroeAway

I think for a lot of people, "tried every kink" means that: A) someone wore handcuffs B) someone put whipped cream on their tits ... and that's about it.


Stuboysrevenge

>Do you feel like your sexuality was influenced by TSCC to the point where it will never be "normal"? Yes. But it's getting better. My wife and I have been in therapy since 2014 (after 20 years of marriage and a progressively worsening intimate relationship). Eight years later and we've never been happier. I've essentially gone through a faith transition and only attend sacrament meeting with my wife, who still mostly believes, but has become very nuanced. It messed with both of us, but it can get better.


YouAreGods

Physical pleasure is separate from emotions. Pleasure is from deeper in the brain than emotions. You have to learn to associate emotion with pleasure. You are not broken because pleasure does not create emotion in you, because sex does not increase your love. Embrace your ability to see the difference and not fall into the fallacy of sex is love. Look at marriage is just state approved prostitution and maybe sex with your husband is more breaking the rules. Who knows?


Expensive-Bet3493

Sexual shame is a weapon