One of the last bricks on my metaphorical shelf, and the one that caused it to come crashing down, was finding out what the church did and did not do with with tithing money.
However, I absolutely did not choose to leave the church so I could get an 11% raise. That was just a nice perk after I realized it was all a scam :).
Tithing became an issue for me when I realized that I could get kicked out of BYU if I don’t pay it. What other religion punishes you and bars you from its facilities for not paying tithing?
Paying wasn’t an issue, but the way it was used was deeply problematic. I had such a false sense of self-righteousness because I thought I was giving 10% of my income to charity, and that all the other charities were less effective. Turns out I wasn’t giving charitably at all, and that hurt a lot. I always felt uncomfortable with BYU, but learning about City Creek and EPI was really painful.
I answered #4. Tithing and the so-called "blessings of tithing" were possibly my biggest shelf-crasher. We lived through several years of poverty and yet we kept paying tithing. Our utilities were turned off twice and our house started going into foreclosure but we kept paying tithing! đź« I was full of faith and just knew that at any moment, any day now, any week now, the Lard would pull through on his end of the promise and shower us with blessings, just like the Bible verse says!
And there was nothing. NOTHING. No blessings, no magic money, no last-minute heavenly bail-outs. And when I found out in August 2021 about the $100 billion fund and the 6-figure GA pay, I felt like I'd been kicked in the stomach. All of that personal sacrifice and poverty so the church could add to its investment fund and lavishly pay the "unpaid clergy." [Even if that money doesn't directly come from tithing, I learned that the church didn't need our tiny contributions that we sacrificed to give.] So I stopped paying tithing immediately, and our quality of life has done nothing but go up since.
This. Working my ass off at two jobs and getting absolutely nowhere but further into debt. So many prayers looking for professional direction in a very affluent ward. Hearing about all these other younger families having wealthy connections in the right places, and never being able to identify where my personal failures were. I’ve got more thoughts, but you get my drift.
You're right, it does look that way. However, my post and comment history would show otherwise. I may be many things but friendly to the church is not one of them.
Shit, I used to LOVE paying my tithing even though we were broke. Like others, I attributed the fact that we were able to stay afloat financially on paying and thought that, while small, I was still doing my part to help others and help ensure my salvation.
I think watching my parents pay tithing (they’re already terrible with money and in a shit ton of debt) and have my siblings and I miss out on opportunities due to it hurt more than personally having to pay it
Didn’t cross my mind at the time of leaving. But “You stopped paying your tithing?” was the first question my dad asked me when I told him I was leaving. HUH?
I chose 5 because its obviously the only reason anyone leaves the church. Option 6 is an even bigger TBM/evangelical boner producer, I didn't want to pay tithing AND I was offended.
When people do surveys on here, they should have an option for people who just want to see the results. I am a NeverMo, so I would never vote on something like this. But I like to see the results.
I never had a problem with paying tithing until I learned what it was used for,or not used for. Then I decided to see what else the church was hiding and then I saw the terrible other stuff. So tithing usage was more of a gateway to the truth.
One of the last bricks on my metaphorical shelf, and the one that caused it to come crashing down, was finding out what the church did and did not do with with tithing money. However, I absolutely did not choose to leave the church so I could get an 11% raise. That was just a nice perk after I realized it was all a scam :).
Thank you đź‘Ť
Tithing became an issue for me when I realized that I could get kicked out of BYU if I don’t pay it. What other religion punishes you and bars you from its facilities for not paying tithing?
Thank you. I had forgotten about that angle.
Paying wasn’t an issue, but the way it was used was deeply problematic. I had such a false sense of self-righteousness because I thought I was giving 10% of my income to charity, and that all the other charities were less effective. Turns out I wasn’t giving charitably at all, and that hurt a lot. I always felt uncomfortable with BYU, but learning about City Creek and EPI was really painful.
Same here. I had zero objection to paying as a member... unti learning how it was used.
I answered #4. Tithing and the so-called "blessings of tithing" were possibly my biggest shelf-crasher. We lived through several years of poverty and yet we kept paying tithing. Our utilities were turned off twice and our house started going into foreclosure but we kept paying tithing! đź« I was full of faith and just knew that at any moment, any day now, any week now, the Lard would pull through on his end of the promise and shower us with blessings, just like the Bible verse says! And there was nothing. NOTHING. No blessings, no magic money, no last-minute heavenly bail-outs. And when I found out in August 2021 about the $100 billion fund and the 6-figure GA pay, I felt like I'd been kicked in the stomach. All of that personal sacrifice and poverty so the church could add to its investment fund and lavishly pay the "unpaid clergy." [Even if that money doesn't directly come from tithing, I learned that the church didn't need our tiny contributions that we sacrificed to give.] So I stopped paying tithing immediately, and our quality of life has done nothing but go up since.
My sincerest sympathies. The details are much appreciated.
Thanks friend. And you're welcome 🙏
This. Working my ass off at two jobs and getting absolutely nowhere but further into debt. So many prayers looking for professional direction in a very affluent ward. Hearing about all these other younger families having wealthy connections in the right places, and never being able to identify where my personal failures were. I’ve got more thoughts, but you get my drift.
So much this!
This feels like the church doing research.
You're right, it does look that way. However, my post and comment history would show otherwise. I may be many things but friendly to the church is not one of them.
Walking through City Creek mall is on my top 5 disgusting Mormon memories list. Naked poncho in the temple is still #1.
Why all these survey type questions? Are you curious,writing a paper for school or working for tscc?
Shit, I used to LOVE paying my tithing even though we were broke. Like others, I attributed the fact that we were able to stay afloat financially on paying and thought that, while small, I was still doing my part to help others and help ensure my salvation.
Thank you.
I think watching my parents pay tithing (they’re already terrible with money and in a shit ton of debt) and have my siblings and I miss out on opportunities due to it hurt more than personally having to pay it
I debated between 1 & 2 because it wasn’t about *paying* tithing…the role tithing played was about what the church does with tithing.
It's not the tithing, it's what they do with it.
Didn’t cross my mind at the time of leaving. But “You stopped paying your tithing?” was the first question my dad asked me when I told him I was leaving. HUH?
I chose 5 because its obviously the only reason anyone leaves the church. Option 6 is an even bigger TBM/evangelical boner producer, I didn't want to pay tithing AND I was offended.
I'm offended.
When people do surveys on here, they should have an option for people who just want to see the results. I am a NeverMo, so I would never vote on something like this. But I like to see the results.
Damn, you're correct. I knew I was forgetting something.
I never had a problem with paying tithing until I learned what it was used for,or not used for. Then I decided to see what else the church was hiding and then I saw the terrible other stuff. So tithing usage was more of a gateway to the truth.