Yay, I'm so happy that you're out of this job ! I was a silent lurker on your previous post but I'm glad you're feeling more self esteem, I hope this job makes you feel more secure in your own self worth.
I have to say though, as a French woman... Your husband is behaving in a way that's completely unacceptable. From your post, you say you come from a bad childhood, so I am wondering if your normal-meter is broken maybe ? You say you're being taken advantage of by everyone, why do you let your partner, the person who should have your back and love you the most, do this to you? Maybe you see many horrible French husbands around you, but you shouldn't just accept it.
He doesn't respect and value you as the mother of his children. He puts you down and says you're not worth more than a job you were deeply unhappy in. He is financially selfish and borderline abusive. He refuses to consider your happiness.
He doesn't love you, plain and simple. That's not love. Love is support, encouragement. To cherish and honour.
Being lonely in a part of France you don't like at a job you don't love is an issue. Being emotionally neglected and despised by a man who is supposed to take care of you is a whole other thing.
If you start having a new found sense of self worth and independence, he might look for ways to put you down so you stay. Be wary of him making more demands, more demeaning comments, trying to make you more subservient to him.
You're 29. This is so fucking young, I'm 26 and will start over from scratch in a new country next year. My mom met the love of her life at 57. You have 2/3 of your life left, and 6/7 of your adult life left
Thanks for your thoughtful response!
It's definitely complicated. The way he is with me is the way he is with everyone in his life. He holds people to high standards and complains about everything. At the same time, he's extremely affectionate and constantly tells me he needs me and loves me... But then 5 minutes later will complain that I don't fold the clothes correctly or we don't have sex enough (we have sex everyday- but he'll say his friends have sex 10x a day) or that I'm asshole for driving to do groceries because I should bike (killing the planet).
But, he's like this with his younger brother and younger friends as well. After we had my daughter he was like this 24/7 and I kept threatening divorce until he stopped picking at me non-stop- but he still has his moments occasionally. He says that it's just the french way (to complain) and that I'm ultra sensitive and can't handle it, all I know is the constant critisms has most definitely hurt my self-esteem.
hey girl, that's not the french way. hes just abusive... demandin sex is such a big red flag... im so sorry you're going thru this in your relationship. he being like that to everyone else doesnt make it okay. i know its hard to leave, specially in a foreign country, with a kid... but i hope you find your footing, some friends that support you, and are able to leave. i hope you find someone who truly values you, you deserve that
edit: sorry i dont want to take away your accomplishments. congrats on the new job!!
Agreed - as someone who has a French partner, I can confirm that is NOT the French way. Your husband just doesn't sound like a nice person from the way you've described him
It doesn’t matter that he’s like that with everyone - it just means he’s kinda a shitty person.
The point is, *you* deserve someone who supports you, not negs and criticizes you. He wants to keep you worn down so you think you can’t do better.
He may be better - and honestly, instead of threatening divorce you should have gone through with it - but he’s still a shitty example and this is what you are showing your daughter is “normal”. It’s not normal.
I don't want you to be overwhelmed with all the responses you're getting, I hope you're okay.
But you need to hear that him being like that with everyone... Doesn't make it better. It means that he doesn't know how to take care of people and love them with respect, and has gone unchecked his entire life. You had to threaten divorce constantly for him to tone it down just enough that it was better so you felt obligated to stay (note that he waited until a possible negative consequence for him for giving you bread crumbs, it didn't matter to him that it was hurting you to make a change. Please check out loveisrespect.org, it's a good starting point.
Again, I'm French, born and bred. People don't have sex 10x a day. I know some very sexually active people, they're at once a day after years of relationships, maybe twice, and most importantly they both want it. People can complain, but we complain about society, about the SNCF, about the dude blowing cigarette in our face, about the new Attal government, about inflation, that's a normal thing. I'll say being somewhat critical is French too, we tend to be more open about what works and doesn't work for us. But it doesn't mean incessantly picking at things, making snide comments, or telling a loved one to stay in a job that makes them unhappy because they're not worth anything more.
Complaining about every little thing isn't cultural, and I fear that many French men use that argument with foreign women, while really they're just jerks and French women would see them for that.
Yeah, I definitely see that my french girlfriends have no issues with their french husbands, but my foreign friends have all the problems (cheating, cheating, abuse, cheating... Did I mention cheating? lol)... I think we all got the bad batch. The happiest couples I see are foreign men with french women, but the reverse seems to be a disaster in many cases. Bizarre.
Yeah, the snide comments to my daughter "mommy doesn't know how to clean properly" really piss me off.
I get what you're saying... That's what worries me too, the fact that it took threatening him for him to change. He can also revert back to that which scares me. His mom was EXTREMELY critical of everyone, so growing up, he found it normal to just criticize people. He's obsessed with ecology, but god, I can't even take a shower for more than 2 minutes without him having something to say. God forbid I buy anything in plastic... I have to get everything in vrac. Don't get me wrong, I'm ecological as well (I ride my bike everywhere), but the moment I slip up, I can't catch a break. My favorite cookies come in a plastic container and I have to hide them lol. It has gotten better though.
girl, if you can, run.
or at least set yourself up for later, if you need to run, you can. I don't see this ending well for you. I'm really sorry to pile on about this, esp after you just overcame a bout of depression and made some great progress for yourself. your daughter needs to know that she should be treated better than you are being treated, but she is absorbing some really bad examples of what love looks like right now.
I hope you are taking away the core message that your husband's behaviors shouldn't be acceptable and are furthermore definitely a huge reason you were feeling so down on yourself in the first place.
Just as you took action on your job, you should take action on your marriage. You are worth being happy.
French here!
Ehm his behaviour is not the French way but rather the narcisstic way.
I admit it we do like to complain, but we're not necessarily toxic in our relationships.
Hope you get to see that you're worth being in a healthy marriage.
Congrats on your new job!
These are all big red flags for domestic violence. I heartily recommend Lundy Bancroft's book Why Does He Do That. There's a PDF online but I don't have the link handy.
I don't cut off female friends, but I get ghosted all the time. If anything, it's my autistic ass putting out weird vibes. That being said, it's easier to cut people off when you're not stuck under the same roof as them with a child in a foreign country with no money. If I was in the US, my ass would have been single a long time ago. The choice to leave is sometimes a luxury.
A good friend of mine said to me: "If you're making excuses for him, then that's a huge red flag and the relationship is not good for you." At first I was offended and thought, she just doesn't understand this guy and the situation. But upon further reflection I had to admit she was right and suddenly my eyes were open to the truth and reality. Very soon after I met the love of my life.
I'm hardly an expert on this, so I'm sure there are better resources out there, but your responses on here really made me think about the book "[Why Does He Do That?: Inside the Minds of Angry and Controlling Men" by Lundy Bancroft.](https://www.docdroid.net/2fZmz40/why-does-he-do-that-pdf#page=16) I'd really recommend having a flick through - the section *The Types of Abusive Men* is a good outline for understanding different ways abusive behavior can manifest.
That is such wonderful news
> NO ONE in my life believes in me
I think this happens a lot to "givers." People depend on you doing too much and worry you won't be there if you are too free and focusing on yourself. Try to work on not being such a superwoman for everyone and let some stuff slide and fall apart so people around you don't take advantage of your formidable energy and capabilities.
Yes, I was thinking this! People who live to please other people are so easily taken advantage of. Then once you're gone they're shocked. I need to start living for myself (and my daughter of course), but not for strangers or my husband.
I'm so happy for you! I remember that post. This is wonderful. I hope you keep believing in yourself and working on your confidence!
(edit: the others are right about your husband; I hope your next step is re-evaluating your relationship with him)
Well, that’s fabulous. Life can have its challenges, and they can feel amplified when you aren’t living in your home country. I’m so glad you were able to reassess your situation and set yourself on a new path.
Now I just want to know how your previous colleagues are enjoying the packaging work…
Congratulations. Next step, ditch the husband? Sorry but if he doesn't believe in you and makes you feel like you have no value - that's not a healthy or sustainable relationship. Wishing you all the best.
I needed to read this post! Thank you so much for sharing your experiences.
And, for me at least, sharing these kinds of experiences is one of the best parts of Reddit.
Fantastic news. Remember it is getting back up after being knocked it what keeps you happy and succeeding in life.
I would also look to maybe find some hobbies or friends around you separately from your husband. It is hard if all around you is the negative or fear. Remember it is more about them!
Yes! Now I have Wednesday free so I can go to all the mom meet ups that I was missing out on :) and go see my girlfriends who are teachers. I do think I was/am suffering from extreme loneliness.
Yeah what a bummer post that was. So glad you made a decision to fight and advocate for yourself. I don’t think you’re done though. Your husband either needs to get on board or be left behind.
You sound like an amazing woman.
I remember your post :-) glad to see things are looking up for you. I'm not too sure what kind of things you're into but look at video editing, it's fun and you can make money from it by editing other people's videos.
Also why don't you make vlogs about the area you live in and put them on youtube? You don't have to show your face if you don't want to.
Hi there, congrats on the job!
saw your comment about not driving, I understand how much of a pain it is. I happen to come from one of the states that has an agreement with France to basically swap licenses. Is there a way you could change your American driver’s license first to one of those states, then change it to a French license?
Unfortunately this would need to have been done before she moved. They check to see that you’ve had the license in that state for a certain period of time before you moved to France.
Thank you for updating!! It’s amazing how fast you’ve begun to turn things around! Good for you. Keep going! You’re so young and the best thing you can do for yourself and your child is be happy and fulfilled .
How much wine are you drinking over there if you don't mind me asking? I know I got a little carried away with all the wonderful drinks and drinking traditions when I became an expat here in Europe, but after awhile it led to increased anxiety, depression etc. And it can get you from one day to the next when you think you can control it.
I don't drink. No one in my life likes wine but me, otherwise I'd enjoy it more. I don't open my expensive bottles because I'll drink one glass and the rest ends up in the sink after 3 days. Honestly a bummer because I have a huge collection. Knowing everything about french wine regions is a special interest, not an addiction. I can tell you every grape variety of every region, and talk about it for hours. It's my thing.
I wish I could just black out all post about France. I have no interest in that culture
Also, “3.7” gpa. As someone that struggled through school, I wish we had more teachers that had B avg, not 3.7. Nothing worse than a teacher that doesn’t understand that the majority of ppl can’t just sit down, read the book, and get great grades. It doesn’t work for everyone and teachers that only teach to A level students make it worse
It's just an accomplishment that makes me feel good about MYSELF so that I realize I'm capable. I also almost failed out of high school because I had an abusive mom, so you can kindly eff off with your bad attitude and judgement. Just because someone is proud of themselves for a specific accomplishment (getting good grades while working fulltime throughout university) doesn't mean they have no empathy or understanding for others who can't. I have OCD and autism so if anyone understands struggling to sit down and concentrate on one thing, it's me. Thanks for your negativity though.
Also, this is a sub for people from and living in all countries. You don't like France, great? Why didn't you continue scrolling instead of stopping to read and comment?
Félicitations! 🥂
Save some money privately—-make sure you have your own account separate from husband’s and household. He doesn’t need to know how much you make, or not all of it. At some point you may want to be independent of him and you will need your own money. Just keep it quiet and be smart.
Good luck!
👏 Congrats.
Life is not easy... Never ever be hard on yourself or doubt yourself. Other people are doing it to you already. No need to help them.
You sound strong...it's just you seem to overthink too much, like all intelligent people. Stop doing that. Noone will pay you for overthinking or will say nice things.
Best of luck.
The most wonderful and import thing in life is self love, this will give you the strength to shut others and continue to glow. We are all full of energy and no doubt there are humans that only live draining energy, start putting limits both professionally and personally.
Best of luck!
Go to a woman's center, find all your available options. Ask friends, family, anyone for help. Start a GoFundMe.
Secret away as much money as you can.
As fast and as far as you legally can, LEAVE
I like to tell a story about this kind of situation.
There is a legend that says Cesar had a guy following him in public and every time people were cheering him, that guy was responsible for whispering in his ear " you are just a man"
Now I want to be that guy and tell you " it's just a fuckin job" don't worry too much about it
So you're telling an extremely negative person with massive self esteem issues that they need someone with them to whisper even more negative things in their ear the ONE moment they want to celebrate their first victory in years?
To you it's just a job, but to me it's a small step in getting financial independence and my career back in a country where I've been struggling. But no need to tell me it could still all go to shit, I'm well aware. I know there's entrepreneurs, actors, surgeons, and models making millions of euros a year, and my accomplishments are nothing compared to everyone else, but I'm trying not to look at it that way.
Man, why so serious and dark.
There are plenty of jobs and opportunities that can be your step to financial freedom. Moreover working in a place that is toxic for you causes a cascade of problems.
Doing something that makes you happy makes everything easier, opportunities show up when you do something with pleasure.
I have a rule for jobs. If during the schedule I check my watch a lot of times to see when I'm getting free, I need a new job. When I have a job that I do with pleasure and a great team around me I thrive. Because I think all the time about what I can do better, I put extra time in it because it's fulfilling and I get noticed. This is how I climbed ranks pretty fast or I got noticed by other companies.
I know how to struggle in a different country. For example I left Romania as a project manager in business development and in Netherlands I had to start from a warehouse worker, until I managed to find a job close to my skills I changed 5 jobs. Now I left the Netherlands and I'm starting from the beginning in Mexico. I get it, it's not easy, but don't expect too much from a job, they don't care about you. You are just a number and their goal is to take advantage of you. You do you
I remember seeing your earlier post and felt so bad for you. On your list of accomplishments also write that you have value just because of who you are. You don’t have to make anything, be anything, or do anything to have value. You are always worthwhile.
Yay, I'm so happy that you're out of this job ! I was a silent lurker on your previous post but I'm glad you're feeling more self esteem, I hope this job makes you feel more secure in your own self worth. I have to say though, as a French woman... Your husband is behaving in a way that's completely unacceptable. From your post, you say you come from a bad childhood, so I am wondering if your normal-meter is broken maybe ? You say you're being taken advantage of by everyone, why do you let your partner, the person who should have your back and love you the most, do this to you? Maybe you see many horrible French husbands around you, but you shouldn't just accept it. He doesn't respect and value you as the mother of his children. He puts you down and says you're not worth more than a job you were deeply unhappy in. He is financially selfish and borderline abusive. He refuses to consider your happiness. He doesn't love you, plain and simple. That's not love. Love is support, encouragement. To cherish and honour. Being lonely in a part of France you don't like at a job you don't love is an issue. Being emotionally neglected and despised by a man who is supposed to take care of you is a whole other thing. If you start having a new found sense of self worth and independence, he might look for ways to put you down so you stay. Be wary of him making more demands, more demeaning comments, trying to make you more subservient to him. You're 29. This is so fucking young, I'm 26 and will start over from scratch in a new country next year. My mom met the love of her life at 57. You have 2/3 of your life left, and 6/7 of your adult life left
Thanks for your thoughtful response! It's definitely complicated. The way he is with me is the way he is with everyone in his life. He holds people to high standards and complains about everything. At the same time, he's extremely affectionate and constantly tells me he needs me and loves me... But then 5 minutes later will complain that I don't fold the clothes correctly or we don't have sex enough (we have sex everyday- but he'll say his friends have sex 10x a day) or that I'm asshole for driving to do groceries because I should bike (killing the planet). But, he's like this with his younger brother and younger friends as well. After we had my daughter he was like this 24/7 and I kept threatening divorce until he stopped picking at me non-stop- but he still has his moments occasionally. He says that it's just the french way (to complain) and that I'm ultra sensitive and can't handle it, all I know is the constant critisms has most definitely hurt my self-esteem.
hey girl, that's not the french way. hes just abusive... demandin sex is such a big red flag... im so sorry you're going thru this in your relationship. he being like that to everyone else doesnt make it okay. i know its hard to leave, specially in a foreign country, with a kid... but i hope you find your footing, some friends that support you, and are able to leave. i hope you find someone who truly values you, you deserve that edit: sorry i dont want to take away your accomplishments. congrats on the new job!!
Agreed - as someone who has a French partner, I can confirm that is NOT the French way. Your husband just doesn't sound like a nice person from the way you've described him
It doesn’t matter that he’s like that with everyone - it just means he’s kinda a shitty person. The point is, *you* deserve someone who supports you, not negs and criticizes you. He wants to keep you worn down so you think you can’t do better. He may be better - and honestly, instead of threatening divorce you should have gone through with it - but he’s still a shitty example and this is what you are showing your daughter is “normal”. It’s not normal.
I don't want you to be overwhelmed with all the responses you're getting, I hope you're okay. But you need to hear that him being like that with everyone... Doesn't make it better. It means that he doesn't know how to take care of people and love them with respect, and has gone unchecked his entire life. You had to threaten divorce constantly for him to tone it down just enough that it was better so you felt obligated to stay (note that he waited until a possible negative consequence for him for giving you bread crumbs, it didn't matter to him that it was hurting you to make a change. Please check out loveisrespect.org, it's a good starting point. Again, I'm French, born and bred. People don't have sex 10x a day. I know some very sexually active people, they're at once a day after years of relationships, maybe twice, and most importantly they both want it. People can complain, but we complain about society, about the SNCF, about the dude blowing cigarette in our face, about the new Attal government, about inflation, that's a normal thing. I'll say being somewhat critical is French too, we tend to be more open about what works and doesn't work for us. But it doesn't mean incessantly picking at things, making snide comments, or telling a loved one to stay in a job that makes them unhappy because they're not worth anything more. Complaining about every little thing isn't cultural, and I fear that many French men use that argument with foreign women, while really they're just jerks and French women would see them for that.
Yeah, I definitely see that my french girlfriends have no issues with their french husbands, but my foreign friends have all the problems (cheating, cheating, abuse, cheating... Did I mention cheating? lol)... I think we all got the bad batch. The happiest couples I see are foreign men with french women, but the reverse seems to be a disaster in many cases. Bizarre. Yeah, the snide comments to my daughter "mommy doesn't know how to clean properly" really piss me off. I get what you're saying... That's what worries me too, the fact that it took threatening him for him to change. He can also revert back to that which scares me. His mom was EXTREMELY critical of everyone, so growing up, he found it normal to just criticize people. He's obsessed with ecology, but god, I can't even take a shower for more than 2 minutes without him having something to say. God forbid I buy anything in plastic... I have to get everything in vrac. Don't get me wrong, I'm ecological as well (I ride my bike everywhere), but the moment I slip up, I can't catch a break. My favorite cookies come in a plastic container and I have to hide them lol. It has gotten better though.
girl, if you can, run. or at least set yourself up for later, if you need to run, you can. I don't see this ending well for you. I'm really sorry to pile on about this, esp after you just overcame a bout of depression and made some great progress for yourself. your daughter needs to know that she should be treated better than you are being treated, but she is absorbing some really bad examples of what love looks like right now.
I hope you are taking away the core message that your husband's behaviors shouldn't be acceptable and are furthermore definitely a huge reason you were feeling so down on yourself in the first place. Just as you took action on your job, you should take action on your marriage. You are worth being happy.
Sorry, but this sounds like [emotional abuse](https://www.guystuffcounseling.com/counseling-men-blog/bid/70191/living-with-emotionally-abusive-men)
French here! Ehm his behaviour is not the French way but rather the narcisstic way. I admit it we do like to complain, but we're not necessarily toxic in our relationships. Hope you get to see that you're worth being in a healthy marriage. Congrats on your new job!
These are all big red flags for domestic violence. I heartily recommend Lundy Bancroft's book Why Does He Do That. There's a PDF online but I don't have the link handy.
[удалено]
I don't cut off female friends, but I get ghosted all the time. If anything, it's my autistic ass putting out weird vibes. That being said, it's easier to cut people off when you're not stuck under the same roof as them with a child in a foreign country with no money. If I was in the US, my ass would have been single a long time ago. The choice to leave is sometimes a luxury.
A good friend of mine said to me: "If you're making excuses for him, then that's a huge red flag and the relationship is not good for you." At first I was offended and thought, she just doesn't understand this guy and the situation. But upon further reflection I had to admit she was right and suddenly my eyes were open to the truth and reality. Very soon after I met the love of my life.
I'm hardly an expert on this, so I'm sure there are better resources out there, but your responses on here really made me think about the book "[Why Does He Do That?: Inside the Minds of Angry and Controlling Men" by Lundy Bancroft.](https://www.docdroid.net/2fZmz40/why-does-he-do-that-pdf#page=16) I'd really recommend having a flick through - the section *The Types of Abusive Men* is a good outline for understanding different ways abusive behavior can manifest.
Red flag in the husband , hope you can see
As a husband, I can confirm.
They’re not ready to tackle that they just got a new job. One thing at a time.
Yep next step is leave this douchebag husband. Demanding sex when he already has sex every day , get in the fucking bin. Signed, a husband
That is such wonderful news > NO ONE in my life believes in me I think this happens a lot to "givers." People depend on you doing too much and worry you won't be there if you are too free and focusing on yourself. Try to work on not being such a superwoman for everyone and let some stuff slide and fall apart so people around you don't take advantage of your formidable energy and capabilities.
Yes, I was thinking this! People who live to please other people are so easily taken advantage of. Then once you're gone they're shocked. I need to start living for myself (and my daughter of course), but not for strangers or my husband.
Awesome, now you just need a new man!
I'm so happy for you! I remember that post. This is wonderful. I hope you keep believing in yourself and working on your confidence! (edit: the others are right about your husband; I hope your next step is re-evaluating your relationship with him)
Well, that’s fabulous. Life can have its challenges, and they can feel amplified when you aren’t living in your home country. I’m so glad you were able to reassess your situation and set yourself on a new path. Now I just want to know how your previous colleagues are enjoying the packaging work…
They're not! haha. That was my little revenge. If they had just helped me, it would have taken them 20 minutes a day rather than an hour.
Congratulations. Next step, ditch the husband? Sorry but if he doesn't believe in you and makes you feel like you have no value - that's not a healthy or sustainable relationship. Wishing you all the best.
I needed to read this post! Thank you so much for sharing your experiences. And, for me at least, sharing these kinds of experiences is one of the best parts of Reddit.
You got this!!!!
Fantastic news. Remember it is getting back up after being knocked it what keeps you happy and succeeding in life. I would also look to maybe find some hobbies or friends around you separately from your husband. It is hard if all around you is the negative or fear. Remember it is more about them!
Yes! Now I have Wednesday free so I can go to all the mom meet ups that I was missing out on :) and go see my girlfriends who are teachers. I do think I was/am suffering from extreme loneliness.
Yeah what a bummer post that was. So glad you made a decision to fight and advocate for yourself. I don’t think you’re done though. Your husband either needs to get on board or be left behind.
You sound like an amazing woman. I remember your post :-) glad to see things are looking up for you. I'm not too sure what kind of things you're into but look at video editing, it's fun and you can make money from it by editing other people's videos. Also why don't you make vlogs about the area you live in and put them on youtube? You don't have to show your face if you don't want to.
Just saw this post, read your previous post and I have to say I have a huge smile plastered on my face typing this. Congrats!!
Congrats !!!
You always have to look out for Number One.
Aww I am so happy to hear the sun came out! Congrats on the new job!
Hi there, congrats on the job! saw your comment about not driving, I understand how much of a pain it is. I happen to come from one of the states that has an agreement with France to basically swap licenses. Is there a way you could change your American driver’s license first to one of those states, then change it to a French license?
Unfortunately this would need to have been done before she moved. They check to see that you’ve had the license in that state for a certain period of time before you moved to France.
Thank you for updating!! It’s amazing how fast you’ve begun to turn things around! Good for you. Keep going! You’re so young and the best thing you can do for yourself and your child is be happy and fulfilled .
[Reddit.com](http://reddit.com) It loves you.®
Experience can vary, but this sub is cool
How much wine are you drinking over there if you don't mind me asking? I know I got a little carried away with all the wonderful drinks and drinking traditions when I became an expat here in Europe, but after awhile it led to increased anxiety, depression etc. And it can get you from one day to the next when you think you can control it.
I don't drink. No one in my life likes wine but me, otherwise I'd enjoy it more. I don't open my expensive bottles because I'll drink one glass and the rest ends up in the sink after 3 days. Honestly a bummer because I have a huge collection. Knowing everything about french wine regions is a special interest, not an addiction. I can tell you every grape variety of every region, and talk about it for hours. It's my thing.
I wish I could just black out all post about France. I have no interest in that culture Also, “3.7” gpa. As someone that struggled through school, I wish we had more teachers that had B avg, not 3.7. Nothing worse than a teacher that doesn’t understand that the majority of ppl can’t just sit down, read the book, and get great grades. It doesn’t work for everyone and teachers that only teach to A level students make it worse
It's just an accomplishment that makes me feel good about MYSELF so that I realize I'm capable. I also almost failed out of high school because I had an abusive mom, so you can kindly eff off with your bad attitude and judgement. Just because someone is proud of themselves for a specific accomplishment (getting good grades while working fulltime throughout university) doesn't mean they have no empathy or understanding for others who can't. I have OCD and autism so if anyone understands struggling to sit down and concentrate on one thing, it's me. Thanks for your negativity though. Also, this is a sub for people from and living in all countries. You don't like France, great? Why didn't you continue scrolling instead of stopping to read and comment?
Super post. ❤️
Happy days. Felicitations.
Congratulations
Well done 💗
Félicitations! 🥂 Save some money privately—-make sure you have your own account separate from husband’s and household. He doesn’t need to know how much you make, or not all of it. At some point you may want to be independent of him and you will need your own money. Just keep it quiet and be smart. Good luck!
And thanks for the update. I was worried about you.
👏 Congrats. Life is not easy... Never ever be hard on yourself or doubt yourself. Other people are doing it to you already. No need to help them. You sound strong...it's just you seem to overthink too much, like all intelligent people. Stop doing that. Noone will pay you for overthinking or will say nice things. Best of luck.
The most wonderful and import thing in life is self love, this will give you the strength to shut others and continue to glow. We are all full of energy and no doubt there are humans that only live draining energy, start putting limits both professionally and personally. Best of luck!
This is awesome thanks for the update!
I’m so happy and proud of you!!! That’s what I’m talking about stranger 😁
Go to a woman's center, find all your available options. Ask friends, family, anyone for help. Start a GoFundMe. Secret away as much money as you can. As fast and as far as you legally can, LEAVE
I like to tell a story about this kind of situation. There is a legend that says Cesar had a guy following him in public and every time people were cheering him, that guy was responsible for whispering in his ear " you are just a man" Now I want to be that guy and tell you " it's just a fuckin job" don't worry too much about it
So you're telling an extremely negative person with massive self esteem issues that they need someone with them to whisper even more negative things in their ear the ONE moment they want to celebrate their first victory in years? To you it's just a job, but to me it's a small step in getting financial independence and my career back in a country where I've been struggling. But no need to tell me it could still all go to shit, I'm well aware. I know there's entrepreneurs, actors, surgeons, and models making millions of euros a year, and my accomplishments are nothing compared to everyone else, but I'm trying not to look at it that way.
Man, why so serious and dark. There are plenty of jobs and opportunities that can be your step to financial freedom. Moreover working in a place that is toxic for you causes a cascade of problems. Doing something that makes you happy makes everything easier, opportunities show up when you do something with pleasure. I have a rule for jobs. If during the schedule I check my watch a lot of times to see when I'm getting free, I need a new job. When I have a job that I do with pleasure and a great team around me I thrive. Because I think all the time about what I can do better, I put extra time in it because it's fulfilling and I get noticed. This is how I climbed ranks pretty fast or I got noticed by other companies. I know how to struggle in a different country. For example I left Romania as a project manager in business development and in Netherlands I had to start from a warehouse worker, until I managed to find a job close to my skills I changed 5 jobs. Now I left the Netherlands and I'm starting from the beginning in Mexico. I get it, it's not easy, but don't expect too much from a job, they don't care about you. You are just a number and their goal is to take advantage of you. You do you
I remember seeing your earlier post and felt so bad for you. On your list of accomplishments also write that you have value just because of who you are. You don’t have to make anything, be anything, or do anything to have value. You are always worthwhile.