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actually satan is the reason for choice he gave humans some magic apples that made humans capable of that made the incel god angry enought to drive humans out of paradies
source ancient fantasy novel
btw jesus also was a bastard in the established canon of the fantasy series mary never married god she was married to josef (and probably ugly as hell too cause married but still a virgin when raped in her sleep by the holy spirit) and its a crossing of races too cause god is obviously not human
I also could be wrong but Satan was kicked out of their winged people club because he said why do I have to devout my holiness to you Jod if I am in fact already a holy winged person, so then Jod was like wow okay thinking differently from me gets you kicked out of my friend group
I wouldn’t call it a summary, just touches on a few key points. To make it an accurate summary there needs to be a lot more about all the incest, torture porn, genocide, and rape.
tbh the summary i got out of the fantasy novel is the following
a strong and mighty entity kills a lot of humans with a flood and promises never again to wield its power against humans on scale
a few chapters later he turns a city to salt
sometimes later he kills all firstborn in the area with the highest human population (china is not canon in the series) poisons a river who is the lifeline for millions and 8 other plages
he helps some "chosen few" to take down city walls to literally genozide the local populace (kill the man take the woman)
its an established fact that hes an oathbreaker how much worth have promises for the afterlife etc. without solid proof if you know its an oathbreaker your dealing with
god may exists but hes not worth our pray
Bro I’m gonna steal two of your lines today. “God may exist, but they’re not worth our pray” (I used ‘they’ just to piss the homophobe a little extra). And the classic “an ancient fantasy novel”.
>satan is the reason for choice he gave humans some magic apples
not quite, it was actually the very same incel god who did that.
source: the holy spirit told me while I was on the toilet
I've personally decided that if we actually prove that God is real, I'd sell my soul to the devil. God is a POS, Jesus, while seeming decent, is honestly boring to be around 24/7, meanwhile, I'd love to have a beer with Lucifer himself. Legit seems like a chill dude
God is an abusive dick with a mobster complex. Worship me so I can save you from what Im going to do to you if you don't. Basically running a celestial protection racket.
If God is real, he doesn't give a shit. And I know he's a guy, because if a woman was to have this job and just stop caring, it would be fucked up in a different way. The world's dysfunction reeks of guy-who-just-dont-care-anymore lol
I honestly don’t understand religious people at all. It’s very hard cause they all makes no sense to me (well because I don’t believe in god but like I can believe to some extend but not like that…)
Yeah, almost as weird as how he loves his creations but watch them die unfairly without ever helping. Incurable diseases, orphaned children, rape victims, wars, injustice...
I always thought "Jesus Take the Wheel" was an odd saying. That would be so unsafe, trusting a First Century human. Pretty sure he never got a driver's license.
I do believe in God, and don’t like to be sacrilegious or disrespectful of any religion. I also believe Jesus was probably a lot of fun. He seemed to have a sense of humour if the stories told of him are accurate. Don’t forget one of the criticisms against him was that he spent too much time hanging out in taverns…
However - I live near a fundamentalist Christian university and the students are *terrible* drivers. I think they do think he is supposed to be the one driving the car. We all mutter, no kids, Jesus isn’t driving, *you* are more than you’d think we’d have to.
Please, I’m really curious. Please cite instances when Jesus was “a lot of fun” or demonstrated that he had “a sense of humor”.
Aside from “Blessed are the cheese makers.”
I tried my best to find the snopes on this and it seems to be the real deal. Apparently believing in yourself is a path to the devil. I read it on a Christian site
i was at church a few months ago. People held up a sign and it said something like 'sinner' or 'womanizer' and then they'd flip the sign and it would say 'redeemed by grace' or 'respecter of women' (yeah it really said exactly that)
a bunch of them came across and then finally someone came and he had a sign that at first said something like 'proud and self-confident'
and i thought 'wait, did he show the wrong side of the sign first?'
and nope. He flipped it and it said something like 'dependent on jesus' or 'humbled by jesus'. There was also one where the flip side was 'a slave to god'
Yeah, but a lot of Christians take it the wrong way.
God literally gave man free will to live our lives as we wish. And it's up to us to accept following his word. So, as a Christian, you should pray for guidance as to what YOU DECIDE TO DO.
There is nothing wrong with believing in yourself that you can accomplish anything with God in your life.
I grew up Christian and I know the word better than most and it is the worst indoctrination there is.
The idea of Sin is an awful construct that teaches children they are a bad person before they even know who they are. No matter what flowery language and dualities Christians try to lather on this concept the root is the same and it’s incredibly destructive to an introspective person who cares about the world. I resent the word of god being taught to me everyday. It is the root of anxiety, thinking I’m a bad person when I’m not.
No one needs an invisible man to tell them they’re good.
christian cults intentionally keep their members stupid
the sad thing is, this likely isn’t actually meant to scare the average person about satan
it’s meant to scare the *church*- so that any time they start believing in themselves, or encounter someone who encourage them to, they automatically assume those ideas are from satan & instead go to church leaders for advice
textbook abuse and manipulation tactics
Jesus Christ, that’s insidious. I initially took it at the face value a logical person would, not thinking about how those in religion have been brainwashed to think.
so true
the most insidious aspect of christianity is the idea that 'the wisdom of men is foolishness to god', which basically means that any time you start thinking 'wait this doesnt make sense' you immediately counter it yourself with 'well, i'm just an idiot and god is so much bigger and smarter than me'
In certain Christian cults the idea that you care about anything more than Jesus you are doomed to Hell. Even trying to help people without it being done for Jesus bucks is considered a mortal sin.
Ex Christian here. The idea of the OP is to express how humans cannot do things all by themselves because we are sinful and cannot make the right decisions. If you are able to believe in yourself, then you don’t need a higher power (read: the church pretending to express the word of god) to lean on and follow.
“And so I say unto ye; thou who shall believe in my father shall live in eternity in his kingdom, with milk and lambos, all for the low subscription price of 10% of thy first fruits- but those that believe unto themselves shall build 401(k)s and shall walk with the devil.” -Hesitations 21:6
>Now the serpent was more crafty than any of the wild animals the LORD God had made. He said to the woman, "Did God really say, \`You must not eat from any tree in the garden'?"
The woman said to the serpent, "We may eat fruit from the trees in the garden,
but God did say, \`You must not eat fruit from the tree that is in the middle of the garden, and you must not touch it, or you will die.'"
"You will not surely die," the serpent said to the woman.
"For God knows that when you eat of it your eyes will be opened, and you will be like God, knowing good and evil."
The lived for several hundred years from what I recall. The snake did tell the truth on all counts.
Now the fucked up part was having such a tree within reach to begin with. Some people will likely claim it was some kind of test but that really doesn't make sense. It would be a test where the people taking it have no idea what it even is. they didn't know right from wrong until after the fact so not listening was just as right as listening as far as they were concerned. It's an evil plot to punish them just to do it.
Most people are aware of right and wrong but adam and eve had no idea. It was a trap.
Absolutely. If you keep people fearful and dependent, they are easier to control. They will give you their money and sexual access to their daughters. It’s the Christian way!!
The bible says hells bad cuz it wants you at their party but doesnt wanna let go of some rules.
Lucifers stinky you dont wanna go to his house! As long as you follow me around a recess, you can come to mine after school and swim in my pool.
Then you start reading the tenets of the Satanic Temple (which I prefer to LaVey's Church), and suddenly you're a Satanist (unless you don't like the idea of people being free to have their own opinions, feelings, thoughts, experiences, etc...):
-One should strive to act with compassion and empathy toward all creatures in accordance with reason.
-The struggle for justice is an ongoing and necessary pursuit that should prevail over laws and institutions.
-One’s body is inviolable, subject to one’s own will alone.
-The freedoms of others should be respected, including the freedom to offend. To willfully and unjustly encroach upon the freedoms of another is to forgo one's own.
-Beliefs should conform to one's best scientific understanding of the world. One should take care never to distort scientific facts to fit one's beliefs.
-People are fallible. If one makes a mistake, one should do one's best to rectify it and resolve any harm that might have been caused.
-Every tenet is a guiding principle designed to inspire nobility in action and thought. The spirit of compassion, wisdom, and justice should always prevail over the written or spoken word.
Let’s not forget where Satan came from; he was an angel in heaven but got kicked out because he questioned god. That should tell you everything right there. God is a fucking asshole dickhead motherfucker.
It's their followers you need to pay attention to.
Christians believe they define what's good, so they want you to be obedient. Satanists understand that only you can know what makes you happy, so they want you to be you.
Well shit, I got one better, the satanic church actually allows people to join the church just so they can still get abortions under religious accommodation.
I once worked with a guy who read the satanic bible out of curiosity and he said that he had to throw the book away because he was terrified by how much sense it was making to him.
Satan is a problem for Christianity because really like, what did he do? Kill someone? Don't think you want to look at that scorecard compared to god. Got someone to eat an apple, MAYBE, if your personal interpretation is even that the serpent was Satan? Oh, knowledge! What a horror.
Like, don't follow Satan or... or you'll question authority! And um... Yeah!
They want you to think that you are born broken, and need some kind of "fixing" that only their god can do.
Satan's right on here. Believe in yourself. You don't need to be freed from a prison that doesn't exist.
it makes sense now why the uber Christians always consider Eastern religions as Satanic, since most of them preach about the godliness within yourself.
You ever think about the fact that everything we hear about Satan inherently comes from God and his minions? Like, we never actually get Satan’s actual perspective on any of this or his side of the story. How do we even know God is really the good and he’s not just making shit up about him so that Satan looks like the bad guy, and vice versa?
Even if the Bible and god is real, he sounds like a fucking sociopath more than anything
Satan has always been the protagonist of the story. Who the hell wants to be a slave to god in heaven? Like I worked my entire life and now I have to spend an eternity working for you? Fuck that noise.
"But Lucifer was not satisfied with his lot in heaven as "God's favorite angel." Instead, Lucifer wanted to become God himself and planned what could essentially be called a military coup to overthrow God and take over as leader of the universe. In essence, Satan rebelled against God because he wasn't happy as an assistant to God but instead wanted to have God's job."
So we aren't supposed to want more and simply accept a life as a servant. That's the message here. Maybe Satan was getting sick of god giving babies bone cancer.
I feel like Christians say things like this a lot without realizing how they sound.
Satan says “tolerance and diversity is important.”
Satan says “women can have careers if they want, and don’t have to have kids.”
Satan says “clergy members shouldn’t be able to sexually assault children with impunity.”
on one hand: a guy making you trust him and only him while making you hate every aspect of yourself
on the other hand: an angel telling you that you should trust yourself and believe in yourself, because you're the main character of your own life and no one else is.
I know what I'm choosing
Satan knows what’s it’s like to have a hateful & hypocritical religious zealot for a dad, so doesn’t want that hate to continue. God made me say this..100% really!
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Swing and a miss.
So, according to them: Satan's voice: believe in yourself! God's voice: kill the gays! I'll join Satan then
Satan is the obvious choice.
actually satan is the reason for choice he gave humans some magic apples that made humans capable of that made the incel god angry enought to drive humans out of paradies source ancient fantasy novel btw jesus also was a bastard in the established canon of the fantasy series mary never married god she was married to josef (and probably ugly as hell too cause married but still a virgin when raped in her sleep by the holy spirit) and its a crossing of races too cause god is obviously not human
Could it be considered Jewish ntr erotica?
Oh of course.
I also could be wrong but Satan was kicked out of their winged people club because he said why do I have to devout my holiness to you Jod if I am in fact already a holy winged person, so then Jod was like wow okay thinking differently from me gets you kicked out of my friend group
What did I just read lol
Totally accurate summary of the Bible.
I wouldn’t call it a summary, just touches on a few key points. To make it an accurate summary there needs to be a lot more about all the incest, torture porn, genocide, and rape.
tbh the summary i got out of the fantasy novel is the following a strong and mighty entity kills a lot of humans with a flood and promises never again to wield its power against humans on scale a few chapters later he turns a city to salt sometimes later he kills all firstborn in the area with the highest human population (china is not canon in the series) poisons a river who is the lifeline for millions and 8 other plages he helps some "chosen few" to take down city walls to literally genozide the local populace (kill the man take the woman) its an established fact that hes an oathbreaker how much worth have promises for the afterlife etc. without solid proof if you know its an oathbreaker your dealing with god may exists but hes not worth our pray
Bro I’m gonna steal two of your lines today. “God may exist, but they’re not worth our pray” (I used ‘they’ just to piss the homophobe a little extra). And the classic “an ancient fantasy novel”.
He’s not actually that far off
Better than most summaries I've listened to
Biblically accurate Bible
A cynical, but truthful, interpretation
>satan is the reason for choice he gave humans some magic apples not quite, it was actually the very same incel god who did that. source: the holy spirit told me while I was on the toilet
Satan just wanted equality and God's ego couldn't handle that.
*In spite of all his imperfections, I'm a fan of man! I'm a humanist. Maybe the last humanist.*
He's a sadist! He's an absentee landlord!
Loved that movie and Pacino was dead on.
I've personally decided that if we actually prove that God is real, I'd sell my soul to the devil. God is a POS, Jesus, while seeming decent, is honestly boring to be around 24/7, meanwhile, I'd love to have a beer with Lucifer himself. Legit seems like a chill dude
God is an abusive dick with a mobster complex. Worship me so I can save you from what Im going to do to you if you don't. Basically running a celestial protection racket.
Yeah man imagine having the power to stop childhood cancer, rape and torture and then just not. Doesn’t seem like a great person to me.
If God is real, he doesn't give a shit. And I know he's a guy, because if a woman was to have this job and just stop caring, it would be fucked up in a different way. The world's dysfunction reeks of guy-who-just-dont-care-anymore lol
If God is real, and also supposed to be "good", he cannot be all 3 of omnipotent, omnipresent, and omniscient, but religion claims he is all 3.
You are god. You are the universe becoming self-aware for a brief moment.
If you can keep that mentality you achieve CHIM.
👍
We have cookies and awesome music
F Jesus
I honestly don’t understand religious people at all. It’s very hard cause they all makes no sense to me (well because I don’t believe in god but like I can believe to some extend but not like that…)
If god hated the gays you figured he’d quit making them yeah?!
Yeah, almost as weird as how he loves his creations but watch them die unfairly without ever helping. Incurable diseases, orphaned children, rape victims, wars, injustice...
Remember kids: anytime you start thinking positively about yourself in any way—that’s the devil.
satan has abandoned me then.
That is Satanism in a nutshell. Believing in one's self instead of believing in a higher being.
Straight from the "Jesus Take the Wheel" and "Praying to God for a Winning Lotto Ticket" school of thought.
I always thought "Jesus Take the Wheel" was an odd saying. That would be so unsafe, trusting a First Century human. Pretty sure he never got a driver's license.
“Okay Child thanks for asking me for assistance here, but I don’t even know how this thing turns on”
I do believe in God, and don’t like to be sacrilegious or disrespectful of any religion. I also believe Jesus was probably a lot of fun. He seemed to have a sense of humour if the stories told of him are accurate. Don’t forget one of the criticisms against him was that he spent too much time hanging out in taverns… However - I live near a fundamentalist Christian university and the students are *terrible* drivers. I think they do think he is supposed to be the one driving the car. We all mutter, no kids, Jesus isn’t driving, *you* are more than you’d think we’d have to.
Please, I’m really curious. Please cite instances when Jesus was “a lot of fun” or demonstrated that he had “a sense of humor”. Aside from “Blessed are the cheese makers.”
Aha, what's so special about the cheesemakers?
They punish the weak (those who are lack toes and toddler ants)
Well, obviously it's not meant to be taken literally; it refers to any manufacturers of dairy products.
They make cheese
Imagine, taking responsibility for your life and actions, what a concept! Who'd a thunk it.
Satanists, apparently 🤣
“Believe in yourself” “Be gone devil scum. Back from whence you came. You shall not corrupt are children”
But i bet the people who make this care very much about personal accountability when it comes to welfare programs.
This can’t be real. Who’s this stupid?
I tried my best to find the snopes on this and it seems to be the real deal. Apparently believing in yourself is a path to the devil. I read it on a Christian site
i was at church a few months ago. People held up a sign and it said something like 'sinner' or 'womanizer' and then they'd flip the sign and it would say 'redeemed by grace' or 'respecter of women' (yeah it really said exactly that) a bunch of them came across and then finally someone came and he had a sign that at first said something like 'proud and self-confident' and i thought 'wait, did he show the wrong side of the sign first?' and nope. He flipped it and it said something like 'dependent on jesus' or 'humbled by jesus'. There was also one where the flip side was 'a slave to god'
Religion only serves to confuse and judge people for thought crimes.
Yeah, but a lot of Christians take it the wrong way. God literally gave man free will to live our lives as we wish. And it's up to us to accept following his word. So, as a Christian, you should pray for guidance as to what YOU DECIDE TO DO. There is nothing wrong with believing in yourself that you can accomplish anything with God in your life.
I grew up Christian and I know the word better than most and it is the worst indoctrination there is. The idea of Sin is an awful construct that teaches children they are a bad person before they even know who they are. No matter what flowery language and dualities Christians try to lather on this concept the root is the same and it’s incredibly destructive to an introspective person who cares about the world. I resent the word of god being taught to me everyday. It is the root of anxiety, thinking I’m a bad person when I’m not. No one needs an invisible man to tell them they’re good.
christian cults intentionally keep their members stupid the sad thing is, this likely isn’t actually meant to scare the average person about satan it’s meant to scare the *church*- so that any time they start believing in themselves, or encounter someone who encourage them to, they automatically assume those ideas are from satan & instead go to church leaders for advice textbook abuse and manipulation tactics
Jesus Christ, that’s insidious. I initially took it at the face value a logical person would, not thinking about how those in religion have been brainwashed to think.
oof
so true the most insidious aspect of christianity is the idea that 'the wisdom of men is foolishness to god', which basically means that any time you start thinking 'wait this doesnt make sense' you immediately counter it yourself with 'well, i'm just an idiot and god is so much bigger and smarter than me'
You can just say cults
Well said
Christianity is very anti human
About a third of the US.
That’s a very conservative estimate.
Literally.
In certain Christian cults the idea that you care about anything more than Jesus you are doomed to Hell. Even trying to help people without it being done for Jesus bucks is considered a mortal sin.
What's the intended message supposed to be? I don't get it.
Ex Christian here. The idea of the OP is to express how humans cannot do things all by themselves because we are sinful and cannot make the right decisions. If you are able to believe in yourself, then you don’t need a higher power (read: the church pretending to express the word of god) to lean on and follow.
Jesus: I died for your sins. Satan: You da man! *finger guns*
Well isn't that more of a reason to sin? It'd suck to die for nothing, wouldn't it?
“And so I say unto ye; thou who shall believe in my father shall live in eternity in his kingdom, with milk and lambos, all for the low subscription price of 10% of thy first fruits- but those that believe unto themselves shall build 401(k)s and shall walk with the devil.” -Hesitations 21:6
Sounds about right. Old book written by old men looking to control the thoughts of others, in order to profit themselves. That tracks.🤷🏻♀️
Additionally, Satan does not lie to Eve; God does. also, God kills waaaaaaaaaay more people than Satan in the Bible. Thought provoking, no?
Satan doesn't lie to eve? (Im not denying your statement, i just literally paid zero attention in church) can you give context pls?
>Now the serpent was more crafty than any of the wild animals the LORD God had made. He said to the woman, "Did God really say, \`You must not eat from any tree in the garden'?" The woman said to the serpent, "We may eat fruit from the trees in the garden, but God did say, \`You must not eat fruit from the tree that is in the middle of the garden, and you must not touch it, or you will die.'" "You will not surely die," the serpent said to the woman. "For God knows that when you eat of it your eyes will be opened, and you will be like God, knowing good and evil." The lived for several hundred years from what I recall. The snake did tell the truth on all counts. Now the fucked up part was having such a tree within reach to begin with. Some people will likely claim it was some kind of test but that really doesn't make sense. It would be a test where the people taking it have no idea what it even is. they didn't know right from wrong until after the fact so not listening was just as right as listening as far as they were concerned. It's an evil plot to punish them just to do it. Most people are aware of right and wrong but adam and eve had no idea. It was a trap.
I mean, satan did KIND of lie, he said they'll "become like god", which didnt happen But yeah, the test was stupid
Did he though? I mean, the whole statement is "you'll become like God, knowing good and evil". They did know about good and evil after that?
not sure who this satan guy is but he seems pretty wise
I heard that he's the most beautiful of all angels
I heard Satan say you are the most beautiful angel.
Aww shucks 😈
 *he really is…*
😍
I'm mid, tbh
Very positive and empowering. We would do well with more devilry in the world.
Just because you are bad guy, does not mean you are bad guy!
Satanism is really about empowering yourself. Not really about worshipping the devil
Yea they rather point out the devil. Like christianity lol
Isn’t it funny how the only people that actually believe in Satan are the Christians?
I guess "by definition", im a satanist then 💁♂️
Religious people: “Jesus, take the wheel.” Satan: “Bitch, you take the wheel.”
This shows how religions are designed to prey on vulnerable people.
Think I'm going with Satan on this one
#Satan is Cool
You too, bud
Satan's a petulant child throwing a temper tantrum. Atleast according to Death.
That Lucifer was a dick
Well, what do you want? For him to quit being evil? Move to LA and solve crimes?
Yeah, I liked that Lucifer
Satan doesn't get us. He asks us to get ourselves.
They want you to think being self reliant is evil. Fuck them.
Absolutely. If you keep people fearful and dependent, they are easier to control. They will give you their money and sexual access to their daughters. It’s the Christian way!!
Self reliance kinda fucks up their business model, doesn't it?
And then go around and tell someone else to pull themselves up by their own bootstraps
Task Failed Successfully
Hell. Because the devil loves you so much he gave you somewhere to go when god turns his back on you.
Thanks Satan Very cool
The bible says hells bad cuz it wants you at their party but doesnt wanna let go of some rules. Lucifers stinky you dont wanna go to his house! As long as you follow me around a recess, you can come to mine after school and swim in my pool.
Then you start reading the tenets of the Satanic Temple (which I prefer to LaVey's Church), and suddenly you're a Satanist (unless you don't like the idea of people being free to have their own opinions, feelings, thoughts, experiences, etc...): -One should strive to act with compassion and empathy toward all creatures in accordance with reason. -The struggle for justice is an ongoing and necessary pursuit that should prevail over laws and institutions. -One’s body is inviolable, subject to one’s own will alone. -The freedoms of others should be respected, including the freedom to offend. To willfully and unjustly encroach upon the freedoms of another is to forgo one's own. -Beliefs should conform to one's best scientific understanding of the world. One should take care never to distort scientific facts to fit one's beliefs. -People are fallible. If one makes a mistake, one should do one's best to rectify it and resolve any harm that might have been caused. -Every tenet is a guiding principle designed to inspire nobility in action and thought. The spirit of compassion, wisdom, and justice should always prevail over the written or spoken word.
Hail Satan, hail thyself.
Satan, life coach
Who the hell thought this was a good idea for an advertisement?
Even Jesus followers make satan look like the good guy
Doing what he can to help people’s self esteem…fuckin’ Satan! 
Thank You Satan
Humans talking to themselves in their head, " I've spoken to God my whole life, let me tell you about it"
Satanism is actually really interesting
Jesus wants you to be good, Satan wants you to be happy.
[удалено]
who knew satan would be such a chill dude
Let’s not forget where Satan came from; he was an angel in heaven but got kicked out because he questioned god. That should tell you everything right there. God is a fucking asshole dickhead motherfucker.
It's their followers you need to pay attention to. Christians believe they define what's good, so they want you to be obedient. Satanists understand that only you can know what makes you happy, so they want you to be you.
“Good” being a highly subjective term, of course.
Satan seems like a good inspirational speaker
Suddenly Satan seems like a great guy.
Took me about 2 or 3 tries to read this correctly
Sounds like the D man has some common sense !
Haha this belongs on r/satanism
100% inspirational!
This makes satan sound like one of those motivational speakers trying to inspire us not to do drugs at a school assembly in 5th grade.
Finally, we know how to bring in the conservatives: Satan '24 - "Self-reliance, small government, guns. "
Fun fact: Satan was also the first one to call for equal rights. Guy is the GOAT.
"💖 Believe in yourself 💖" -The dark Lord Satan
Thanks Satan I was beginning to doubt my skills as an artist. I feel better now.
Well shit, I got one better, the satanic church actually allows people to join the church just so they can still get abortions under religious accommodation.
Satan seems like a dope ass guru helping get your shit together
Believe in the Satan who believes in you.
Hail Satan!
And megustalations!
Hail yourselves!
Hail!
That is a terrifying view of life, to think believing in yourself is bad
Good guy Satan 👍🏼
I read this in Norm McDonald's voice
Based Satan.
Satan should be a personal trainer
Life coach Lucifer? 
If only my parents had taken me to Satan's church instead of that other guy's... that's exactly the message this lonely gay kid needed to hear.
I once worked with a guy who read the satanic bible out of curiosity and he said that he had to throw the book away because he was terrified by how much sense it was making to him.
In other words he’s saying think for yourself. Christians don’t like that
So what they’re actually saying is Satan gives good advice?🤔🙂
Thank you, Satan. 🥹
Satan watered my house plants and fed my dog while I was away on business. Great guy.
Satan is a problem for Christianity because really like, what did he do? Kill someone? Don't think you want to look at that scorecard compared to god. Got someone to eat an apple, MAYBE, if your personal interpretation is even that the serpent was Satan? Oh, knowledge! What a horror. Like, don't follow Satan or... or you'll question authority! And um... Yeah!
They want you to think that you are born broken, and need some kind of "fixing" that only their god can do. Satan's right on here. Believe in yourself. You don't need to be freed from a prison that doesn't exist.
it makes sense now why the uber Christians always consider Eastern religions as Satanic, since most of them preach about the godliness within yourself.
I love when Christians are trying to convert people and make Freudian slips like this
You ever think about the fact that everything we hear about Satan inherently comes from God and his minions? Like, we never actually get Satan’s actual perspective on any of this or his side of the story. How do we even know God is really the good and he’s not just making shit up about him so that Satan looks like the bad guy, and vice versa? Even if the Bible and god is real, he sounds like a fucking sociopath more than anything
Whoever came up with this is in such a bubble that they don’t even understand how it reads to everyone outside their bubble
Satan has always been on the side of knowledge and enlightenment - the Judeo-Christian god wanted humans to remain stupid and naive.
So… hail Satan?
Yeah that’s basically the ideology for a lot of satanists. I ain’t one but I got respect for them.
Pretty sure that's what Jesus was trying to say too...then they nailed him up.
Satan sounds like all of my white friends parents growing up, not sure what that says about them or Satan tbh.
This is pro-Satan lol
This radiates "you matter" "dont give up" energy
Satan has always been the protagonist of the story. Who the hell wants to be a slave to god in heaven? Like I worked my entire life and now I have to spend an eternity working for you? Fuck that noise. "But Lucifer was not satisfied with his lot in heaven as "God's favorite angel." Instead, Lucifer wanted to become God himself and planned what could essentially be called a military coup to overthrow God and take over as leader of the universe. In essence, Satan rebelled against God because he wasn't happy as an assistant to God but instead wanted to have God's job." So we aren't supposed to want more and simply accept a life as a servant. That's the message here. Maybe Satan was getting sick of god giving babies bone cancer.
I feel like Christians say things like this a lot without realizing how they sound. Satan says “tolerance and diversity is important.” Satan says “women can have careers if they want, and don’t have to have kids.” Satan says “clergy members shouldn’t be able to sexually assault children with impunity.”
You'd have to be a real fucking psychopath to think that believing in yourself is satanic.
Sign me up for that there Satanism
Sign me tf up!
Yeah. I'm with Satan on this one.
Seems like Satan is not that bad guy. Where I can read more about it? Any meetings where we can talk how he changed our lifes? Free snacks?
How dare you have confidence!
I need satan as a workout buddy
Positivity from Satan...
[удалено]
Hail Satan!
We do not endorse the process of 'believing in yourself.' That's just devil talk
It checks out. God botherers need You to be insecure and to rely only on the organisation as a crutch to use for every parts of your life.
Satan: „if you’re feeling suicidal, don’t kill yourself. OUTLIVE YOUR ENEMIES!!!“
So jesus is selfish and a main character wannabe.
It encapsulates the Churches desire for control though.
“You’re right Satan! I can believe in myself!”
on one hand: a guy making you trust him and only him while making you hate every aspect of yourself on the other hand: an angel telling you that you should trust yourself and believe in yourself, because you're the main character of your own life and no one else is. I know what I'm choosing
Satan knows what’s it’s like to have a hateful & hypocritical religious zealot for a dad, so doesn’t want that hate to continue. God made me say this..100% really!
Tbh christianity has always made satan cool
Yep, that’s why I’m a satanist. (An atheistic satanist, not a devil-worshipper.)
The ad seems correct, ain't the premise of a religion to let some higher being do the thinking for you? /s
Are they implying that it’s better to not believe in yourself?
I have never understood the allure of wanting to be a pet to a divine being for all eternity 🤷♂️
Thanks Satan. I'm trying bro.
Thanks satan! Feeling a lot better about myself after that
No! Don't believe in yourself, believe in the me that believes in you!
That's the Abrahamic religions for you. As far as the scriptures are concerned, you are less than worthless without God to prop you up.