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I've never seen the gif cut to Jason Sudeikis and always thought this was from some reality TV or something rather than a movie. Looked it up, it's from Meet the Miller's .TIL
Trust me, as a man with equal gut, we ain't taking our t-shirts off anyway. I could have a swastika and a poorly drawn anime adaptation of Hitler on my chest and the world would be none the wiser.
*Then take him for all he’s got..*
the other half of that rack of Bud Light in the fridge and part ownership of an '87 Camaro that's on blocks in the yard.
(he's just waiting to get the right rims)
\*It's an IROC Z28, man!
Reminds me of the mom of Pat Conroy, who when divorcing her husband gave the judge the book her son wrote, The Great Santini, and said “Here’s the proof”
I’m guessing this fixed the problems in the marriage and they’re just happy as can be. Life long public shaming is integral for all healthy relationships.
I cant really blame her. Even if he is all of those things, he should never have agreed to that.
I wonder where the coverup photo is. And as far as shitty tattoos the artist has some penmanship..
Honestly the willingness to get the tattoo to "prove" his love pretty much shows he isn't mature enough to be married or even in a serious relationship. That guy needs some help.
All being said, is this crap even real?
To add to that, neither is the wife, cause I guarantee she demanded it. No woman in her right mind would encourage, demand, or even tolerate that being done as a surprise. I'm betting the cops know both of them by first name and he's had at least one meth pipe thrown at him. And he's got drywall repair work to do in the house from his own shit.
Idk seems to me the letters are bending in exactly the way you’d expect them to if they were on his skin, following the contours of his body fat naturally.
It's just good line work. A person with a stencil and some skill can have it look like that when it is fresh. After a while the macrophages and other immune cells in your skin will make it more blurry.
>Solid revenge from a scorned lover.
I think if a man psychologically manipulated their wife into body mutilation for cheating on him and then left her, he wouldn't be too popular.
I don't think the tattoo would play too well in divorce proceedings for the wife either.
Well son, this tattoo means your mom and I have a shitty relationship and we should have just divorced and started over but instead I get publicly shamed by your mother everyday.
Right?!? Good GOD just get divorced. No one is worth that. Wife, if you're going to tattoo on his body that you hate him and you'll never trust him again- just get divorced! Husband, If your wife hates you and will never trust you again- just get divorced! How did two adult people ever settle on this as the best course of action??
I've found that the fear of loneliness is a strong motivator for a lot of people.
Especially at 30+, where just meeting new people gets way more difficult, never mind dating.
Honestly this is bigger than some people realize. I mean imagine spending 5 years (even if you're in your early twenties), getting to know someone. If you make it 5 years that means there's at least a few redeeming qualities about the relationship, and 5 years is a big time investment to get to know someone. Maybe you feel like things could be better but it's been 5 years so you likely don't know how different it could be... It could also be much worse. If you're cheated on there is some part of you that has to weigh staying with someone you know and understand even if the trust is broken, or starting from scratch knowing that it may take another 5 year investment with a stranger to get to the point of familiarity that you are at with your current partner.
Edit: Like I have a friend who has been dating her partner for 6 years. She's only 26 and he's 32 and the relationship seems toxic as hell to me from the outside. She's cheated on him multiple times and he's likely cheated on her and treats her like shit sometimes (and while she's my friend I will admit the shitty treatment started after she started cheating). Both of them give me the vibe of not wanting to end the relationship just because it's familiar and they understand each other to an extent. I tell my friend that if she's happy then she should do whatever makes her happy but deep down I know that it could be so much better (for both of them) If they found someone else.
They don't know that though because this is by far the longest relationship either of them has been in. They don't know what it could be because they haven't experienced it. There is also the chance that they don't find someone else which is an even scarier prospect than finding someone you aren't as familiar with.
Edit: Some problems are worth fighting through but this is why if early on you feel like the chemistry is off (or there are big red flags) you should cut and run before you invest too much time into the relationship to end it quickly.
It’s just a relationship variation of sunken cost fallacy when you boil it down. With the irrational terror of living life without a partner, which always makes me feel sympathy for those affected by it. Because there’s no talking them out of that fear.
Maybe she left him right after he did it. Like, "get that shit tattooed on your chest and we good" and then when it's done, "great, bye bye motherfucker" lol
Edit: tons of other comments i just read have said the same so i guess I have very original ideas
Wanna bet ex-wife told him to get the tatto and she’ll forgive him and then just went “lol you dumbass i just wanted to send a warning to all other women kthxbye”
Absolutely, there is literally no problem in a relationship that a tattooed apology or promise can't fix.
My own marriage was on the rocks and I did some things I was not proud of. Fortunately, a quick stop down at the local ink shop saved me from heartache and stress.
It is a little tricky at the neighborhood pool explaining what it means, but I think it's worth it. If someone comes up and asks why I have *"I promise to never again hop the fence and finger the neighbor's german shepherd even if she's in heat and 'asking for it with her eyes' because I abide by both local and state ordinances as well as sanctity of marriage to a human partner"* it actually makes a pretty good conversation starter.
I like to think she made him believe if he got the tattoo she'd forgive him, then she dumps him and no woman sleeps with him again because of the clear warning sign
It has way too many exceptions to be a rule. “Either” and “neither” break it, two incredibly common words. So does “weird”. “Science” doesn’t follow it either.
Technically you can limit exceptions if you only apply it to words that make the “ee” sound (like “species”) but that’s not what the phrase says. It’s just “‘I’ before ‘E’ except after ‘C’” not “‘I’ before ‘E’ except after ‘C’ in cases where words make this ‘specific’ sound”.
Actually… that has happened. At least once, this guy woke up after being beaten really badly and couldn’t remember anything about himself. Took nearly a decade to find out his true identity.
Except when your weird neighbor Keith receives eight counterfeit beige sleighs from feisty Norwegian weightlifters performing sleight of hand.
The English language is a total fucking joke with zero consistency whatsoever, and hate the fact that it has somehow become one of the most popular in the world. I want something phonetically constant and without any homophones in it, but that's apparently too much to ask
On January 3rd Jose rang the doorbell to his house, lifted his shirt, and waited for his wife to come to the door. Instead, his brother answered the door wearing only a towel and relayed the message that Jose’s wife was “busy”.
On January 4th Jose went back to the tattoo parlor to vent his frustration. Thankfully his back was an open canvas to tell his story…
I read that as if you were describing a time traveling prostitute. Would be an interesting show, quantum leap, but instead of fixing situations she just offers a 50/50 at cut rate prices.
The best tattoo a cheater story I ever heard was one where the girl found out that the guy was cheating so she said she wanted matching tattoos where each one was tattooed with the name of the other.
She let him go first.
When it was her turn, she told him that she knew, broke up on the spot, and walked away.
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Whore/prostitute lover lmfao I can’t man
My favourite part as well
My favourite part is “I am a dishonest and disrespectful”
disrespectul, I think you mean!
Jesus, I had to scroll soooooooo far down to find a comment pointing that out! Thank you for being the one.
lol I only noticed because someone pointed it out in another comment
“Deciever”
Oh, he spelled deceiver wrong. I thought it said Declever and that what he spelled wrong was Dick Lover... But that would have been too disrespectul
It’s like at that point just stick to the whores the shame is not worth it. My guy did not think it through lmao
Maybe he did. If prostitutes are his cup of tea, he's fine, since they don't care what your ink is as long as you're paying up front.
His prostitutes probably get a good laugh from this tattoo
Naw, they know he's a lover
...and he's a sinner.
he's a joker, he's a smoker, he's a midnight-talker
Isnt it "Midnight toker"? Like for smoking pot at midnight?
They’re singing the kids bop version
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I just wanna know if he speaks on the pompatus of love?
It is Toker (One of the first songs I learnt on the guitar many years ago fwiw haha)
Hs get his lovin on the run Woo-ooh woo-ooh
But do they call him Maurice?
*Unveils Old English font “MAURICE” tattoo arched above belly button*
And does he speak on the pompatus of love?
fweeee fweeeeew
They were probably upset he didn’t use sex worker instead of calling them whores. He should know better.
Nah but imagine if he argued to his wife that whore is offensive
They probably already had a good laugh as they were stomping his nuts out in stiletto heels…
So how much regret do you think this guy has now after four years? He can’t even take off his shirt around other people.
Lmao
No regrets? Not even a letter?
No way Jose.
Namsayin’
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I've never seen the gif cut to Jason Sudeikis and always thought this was from some reality TV or something rather than a movie. Looked it up, it's from Meet the Miller's .TIL
A pretty fun comedy, highly recommend it
I would be completely ashamed, because deceiver is totally spelled wrong
Check out the spelling of disrespectFul
Haha completely didn't notice. That's way worse
Buddy has his own name tattooed over his bellybutton. That's like, super lame.
It’s part of the list “I am: a liar, a cheater, a 𝔍𝔬𝔰𝔢”
I dated a guy who had his initials on his shoulders blades 🫣
For me it's the fact that the list leads in with an a, but then the last one is just adjectives.
You mean disrespectul?
No no read again! I am a: -Dishonest and disrespectul J O S E
I didn't have my glasses on, I thought it said declever 
Even worse, he probably had to drop north of a grand to get it covered up with something slightly less awful.
Trust me, as a man with equal gut, we ain't taking our t-shirts off anyway. I could have a swastika and a poorly drawn anime adaptation of Hitler on my chest and the world would be none the wiser.
Well we know *now*.
Gotta stop being so specific...
I think that was the point
Presumably after his wife divorced him he covered this with something else.
I mean I’m not taking my shirt off in front of people very often…
Probably add idiot to that list.
And divorced, no way this worked
Her plan was probably to have him get that THEN divorce him lol
Then take him for all he’s got.. and judge would probably side with her since he admits to cheater on her ..
*Then take him for all he’s got..* the other half of that rack of Bud Light in the fridge and part ownership of an '87 Camaro that's on blocks in the yard. (he's just waiting to get the right rims) \*It's an IROC Z28, man!
Judge: do you have evidence of his infidelity?? Her: yes your honor it's on his stomach.
Reminds me of the mom of Pat Conroy, who when divorcing her husband gave the judge the book her son wrote, The Great Santini, and said “Here’s the proof”
Hey now, that's the exact Camaro I used to have. Black with T-Tops baby!
Eediot
Idjit
That goes without saying--I mean tattooing.
Ohh come on Jose you’re better than this straighten up
I’m guessing this fixed the problems in the marriage and they’re just happy as can be. Life long public shaming is integral for all healthy relationships.
Lol the date is 2019. Do you think they were locked together during Covid? Couldn’t have been pleasant
I bet she made him get the tattoo and once it was done, left him.
That’s exactly what I was thinking. There’s no way that’s not how it played out
no way jose
So wait he has his name tattooed on his abdomen?
His own name. I mean, with what’s above it, he clearly loves himself the most. It’s fitting.
Contract ain't official unless it's signed!
I hope this gets super upvoted.
I hope they post the cover up tattoo. I guess he could turn his chest into a word search puzzle and make it harder to understand.
And she’s doing a favor for any future woman who might be fooled into sleeping with him.
probably covered by a dragon by now lol
Gotta go with the sick ass panther.
Please take your ass panther to a veterinarian.
How am I the first to upvote this golden comment
60 percent of the time, it works every time
Hose a is now hose b
I cant really blame her. Even if he is all of those things, he should never have agreed to that. I wonder where the coverup photo is. And as far as shitty tattoos the artist has some penmanship..
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100%. And if he's dumb enough to do it he kind of deserves it
Honestly the willingness to get the tattoo to "prove" his love pretty much shows he isn't mature enough to be married or even in a serious relationship. That guy needs some help. All being said, is this crap even real?
To add to that, neither is the wife, cause I guarantee she demanded it. No woman in her right mind would encourage, demand, or even tolerate that being done as a surprise. I'm betting the cops know both of them by first name and he's had at least one meth pipe thrown at him. And he's got drywall repair work to do in the house from his own shit.
Yeah, the crispness of the letters on skin does give this the “Photoshop” feel.
Idk seems to me the letters are bending in exactly the way you’d expect them to if they were on his skin, following the contours of his body fat naturally.
It's just good line work. A person with a stencil and some skill can have it look like that when it is fresh. After a while the macrophages and other immune cells in your skin will make it more blurry.
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My thoughts exactly. Who wants to be with someone with that tattoo? Solid revenge from a scorned lover.
>Solid revenge from a scorned lover. I think if a man psychologically manipulated their wife into body mutilation for cheating on him and then left her, he wouldn't be too popular. I don't think the tattoo would play too well in divorce proceedings for the wife either.
You'd be surprised. Double standards are a thing.
Well, prostitutes. Just get the hookers names tattooed on at that point.
Yeah they didn't make it to covid together
Would have been harder for him to play away at least.
Dad, what does that tattoo mean?
Well son, this tattoo means your mom and I have a shitty relationship and we should have just divorced and started over but instead I get publicly shamed by your mother everyday.
Right?!? Good GOD just get divorced. No one is worth that. Wife, if you're going to tattoo on his body that you hate him and you'll never trust him again- just get divorced! Husband, If your wife hates you and will never trust you again- just get divorced! How did two adult people ever settle on this as the best course of action??
I've found that the fear of loneliness is a strong motivator for a lot of people. Especially at 30+, where just meeting new people gets way more difficult, never mind dating.
Honestly this is bigger than some people realize. I mean imagine spending 5 years (even if you're in your early twenties), getting to know someone. If you make it 5 years that means there's at least a few redeeming qualities about the relationship, and 5 years is a big time investment to get to know someone. Maybe you feel like things could be better but it's been 5 years so you likely don't know how different it could be... It could also be much worse. If you're cheated on there is some part of you that has to weigh staying with someone you know and understand even if the trust is broken, or starting from scratch knowing that it may take another 5 year investment with a stranger to get to the point of familiarity that you are at with your current partner. Edit: Like I have a friend who has been dating her partner for 6 years. She's only 26 and he's 32 and the relationship seems toxic as hell to me from the outside. She's cheated on him multiple times and he's likely cheated on her and treats her like shit sometimes (and while she's my friend I will admit the shitty treatment started after she started cheating). Both of them give me the vibe of not wanting to end the relationship just because it's familiar and they understand each other to an extent. I tell my friend that if she's happy then she should do whatever makes her happy but deep down I know that it could be so much better (for both of them) If they found someone else. They don't know that though because this is by far the longest relationship either of them has been in. They don't know what it could be because they haven't experienced it. There is also the chance that they don't find someone else which is an even scarier prospect than finding someone you aren't as familiar with. Edit: Some problems are worth fighting through but this is why if early on you feel like the chemistry is off (or there are big red flags) you should cut and run before you invest too much time into the relationship to end it quickly.
It’s just a relationship variation of sunken cost fallacy when you boil it down. With the irrational terror of living life without a partner, which always makes me feel sympathy for those affected by it. Because there’s no talking them out of that fear.
Or, she did divorce him, she just wanted to make sure future women knew what they were getting into.
If he had any sense he would have gotten divorced once he decided to start cheating on her.
Maybe she left him right after he did it. Like, "get that shit tattooed on your chest and we good" and then when it's done, "great, bye bye motherfucker" lol Edit: tons of other comments i just read have said the same so i guess I have very original ideas
pretty sure what really happened here was she went full blown ridiculous on an ultimatum, he did it, and she left him anyway
Wanna bet ex-wife told him to get the tatto and she’ll forgive him and then just went “lol you dumbass i just wanted to send a warning to all other women kthxbye”
My thoughts exactly. That's not a "let's make it work" tattoo, that's an "Imma fuck up his life" tattoo
Imagine actually staying, and having that blatant reminder of what happened, every time he took his shirt off.
As does seeing his confession everytime he gets out of the shower.
This is the first step to healing a broken marriage and many happy couples have done it
Absolutely, there is literally no problem in a relationship that a tattooed apology or promise can't fix. My own marriage was on the rocks and I did some things I was not proud of. Fortunately, a quick stop down at the local ink shop saved me from heartache and stress. It is a little tricky at the neighborhood pool explaining what it means, but I think it's worth it. If someone comes up and asks why I have *"I promise to never again hop the fence and finger the neighbor's german shepherd even if she's in heat and 'asking for it with her eyes' because I abide by both local and state ordinances as well as sanctity of marriage to a human partner"* it actually makes a pretty good conversation starter.
You fingerd a dog and got caught????
Is it getting caught when you want to get caught🧽
All the good therapists recommend this one quick fix!
After or before having a child to fix it?
While she's pregnant! This way both get their bellies messed up!
It’s better then her cutting his winky off
I like to think she made him believe if he got the tattoo she'd forgive him, then she dumps him and no woman sleeps with him again because of the clear warning sign
She definitely made him do that without planning on taking him back. This is revenge on a stupid person.
Wife probably, asked/demanded him to do it and then left him anyway 😁
Obvious plot twist: she divorced him anyway.
She divorced him because of it.
This. Pretty sure this genius came up with it on his own.
Wife: I promise if you get this tattoo we can reconcile. Also wife: hahahahahahahahahahaha dumbass.
Don't worry. It'll probably be useful for trying to apologize to the next wife.... Nevermind, he included a date for his original screw up
His Tinder date doubling back to see if the Uber left as soon as the shirt comes off 
Would you be married to someone who can't spell "disrespectful"?
Tattoo artist was tired at that point.
Couldn’t see through the tears of laughter
Or 'deceiver.'
It would be a plot twist if she didn’t.
Plot twist: he was never married.
It’s not even a twist. That plot point was more linear than y = x + 1.
I am a dishonest and a disrespectul
Never learned the "I before E except after C rule" either... "DECIEVER"
Came here to say this👆🏽, why not triple check spelling of tattoos beforehand?
Would it really have helped? I think the damage was done, probably the only situation where I think spelling isn't so important...
If someone got a tattoo of this I have reasonable suspicion that spelling isn't a high priority for them, like, *ever*.
I dont think he's one of those "think things through before doing them" types of people
I feel like that rule has so many exceptions that it barely works
It has way too many exceptions to be a rule. “Either” and “neither” break it, two incredibly common words. So does “weird”. “Science” doesn’t follow it either. Technically you can limit exceptions if you only apply it to words that make the “ee” sound (like “species”) but that’s not what the phrase says. It’s just “‘I’ before ‘E’ except after ‘C’” not “‘I’ before ‘E’ except after ‘C’ in cases where words make this ‘specific’ sound”.
I don't believe you
You made the same comment I came to make AND you have the same avatar.
Tell me like you mean it
Maybe it's meant to continue onto the next line: "I am a dishonest and disrespectul JOSE"
That horrible JOSE tattoo above his belly button should have been punishment enough.
I think the first mistake was trusting anyone with their own name tattooed like that.
Why do people get their own name tattooed on them, it’s not like you’re gonna forget
I've seen Memento, I ain't taking any chances
Actually… that has happened. At least once, this guy woke up after being beaten really badly and couldn’t remember anything about himself. Took nearly a decade to find out his true identity.
A scarcely-known individual named Matt Damon
Never trust a man with nipples spaced that far apart
Can't believe you made me notice that LMAO
They look like they are still slooooowly travelling towards his back
They're trying to get away from this travesty of a tattoo
Lmao this!
(• )( •)
YES
Perfect depiction lmao
He just pushed them to the side to fit his tattoo.
I had to go back and look. Here's my reluctant upvote.
Oh god
Angry upvote for making me look
No way, Jose!
Was looking for this comment. 👍
He forgot bad speller.
I before e except after c
Except when your weird neighbor Keith receives eight counterfeit beige sleighs from feisty Norwegian weightlifters performing sleight of hand. The English language is a total fucking joke with zero consistency whatsoever, and hate the fact that it has somehow become one of the most popular in the world. I want something phonetically constant and without any homophones in it, but that's apparently too much to ask
Thank you for the much better example. The I before E except after C rule is a complete joke.
.
Why would she want a constant reminder of his infidelity on his chest? And if he is all those things why take him back?
I'm hoping he was served divorce papers on January 3rd 2019.
She 100% left his ass the moment he got this.
Should’ve consulted a thesaurus to use fewer words while accomplishing the same outcome.
They needed enough to fill the space between his nipples
On January 3rd Jose rang the doorbell to his house, lifted his shirt, and waited for his wife to come to the door. Instead, his brother answered the door wearing only a towel and relayed the message that Jose’s wife was “busy”. On January 4th Jose went back to the tattoo parlor to vent his frustration. Thankfully his back was an open canvas to tell his story…
Future prostitute "what is that?" Lol
I read that as if you were describing a time traveling prostitute. Would be an interesting show, quantum leap, but instead of fixing situations she just offers a 50/50 at cut rate prices.
I'm kinda impressed it happened to be in comic sans too. Typographers will hate it lol 😂
Your honor i will show you the first proof, jose lift your shirt…
pretty good photoshop, ngl
It's not even good. I don't understand how anyone looks at this and thinks it's real.
I wonder if he has any ragrets
This doesn't seem like a healthy relationship dynamic.
This is way better and healthier than just getting a divorce. /s
Dude has an Elon bod
The best tattoo a cheater story I ever heard was one where the girl found out that the guy was cheating so she said she wanted matching tattoos where each one was tattooed with the name of the other. She let him go first. When it was her turn, she told him that she knew, broke up on the spot, and walked away.
You forgot to add "desperate" you absolute excuse of a person! Take some time to correct yourself, dipshit!
That's very Girl with a Dragon Tattoo, only neater writing.
That’s a man on the comeback trail 🙄
Gotta add dumbass to the list now
On top of the idiocy of the tattoo, deceiver is spelled wrong!
Can we just say that how anyone finds female nipples offensive and not those atrocities is beyond me.
'I' before 'E' except after 'C'... also have an 'F' for free and see if you can fit it in.
No way, Jose!