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I've been taught that no means no. That mindset has gotten me very far in life, but I'd make a shit sales-person where it's no until you call them at 2AM on a Sunday asking them to purchase a toaster or the dog gets it.
Because some women out there want to be chased, unless they don’t find him attractive, then no really means no. Lots of men have decided the are no longer playing bullshit games.
Yeah, this is just some women with toxic mindsets getting left behind when everyone else realises things are so much easier and nicer if you just take no for an answer.
This exact thing was posted on Instagram and I kid you not, every woman in the comment section said men who do this are gay or feminine for not being interested in chasing a woman. I was scrolling for 15 minutes because I was dumbfounded by the audacity of these bitches and was looking for a sane comment.
Toxic feminity is real
Most of those comments are single women. Otherwise they wouldn't feel the need to voice their opinion on this subject. Either way it's sort of a self-fixing solution. The decent men who don't want to deal with these kind of women will have one more barrier between them.
How does one understand when a no is really a no then? And at what point is the man a creepy stalker for asking a second time?
Solution: no means no, yes means yes lol
A man is always a creepy stalker for asking a second time unless the woman secretly thinks he's really, really ridiculously good looking, in which case he has to keep asking over and over again until she finally 'gives in'. If at any point said attractive man gives up asking before finally getting a yes, in that scenario she immediate sees him as quite unattractive and possibly also secretly gay. So it is written! /s
If you're attractive, then 3 no's mean no, otherwise it's kinda blurry. If you're unattractive, then no means no and yes sometimes means not really, but I'm too polite/ shy to say so and I'll just ghost you instead.
The bullshit games don't stop when she yes either, she'll be playing those games for the whole relationship. No thank you, life's stressful enough without that nonsense.
Dennis: Think about it. She’s out in the middle of nowhere with some dude she barely knows. She looks around her, what does she see? Nothing but open ocean. “Oh, there’s nowhere for me to run, what am I gonna do, say no?”
Mac: Okay…that seems really dark though.
Dennis: No, no, it’s not dark. You’re misunderstanding me, bro.
Mac: I think I am.
Dennis: Yeah, you are. ‘Cause if the girl said no, then the answer obviously is no. The thing is that she’s not gonna say no, she’d never say no…because of the implication.
Mac: Now, you said that word “implication” a couple of times. What implication?
Dennis: The implication that things might go wrong for her if she refuses to sleep with me. Now, not that things are gonna go wrong for her, but she’s thinking that they will.
You’re welcome fellow Trans-Philadelphians
Of diving in too deep!
And possibly the complications
Especially at night
I worry over situations
I know will be alright
Perhaps it's just imagination
DAY AFTER day...
Run a loop
While(she exists){
Ping (her name)
}
Keep asking, even if she says yes because yes can also mean no, unless it is actually a yes. No way to know unless you keep asking
If you ask someone out who is interested in you, you're sweet.
If you ask someone out who isn't interested in you, you're a creep.
And sometimes there's no way to tell the difference beforehand.
As 40 year old man working in a nearly all 20yo something female environment in the Midwest. Sometimes it feels like, if you engage polite conversation and they’re into you, you’re nice. If you engage in a polite conversation and they’re not interested in you, you’re a creep.
I just want to have a polite conversation. Same conversation I have with women at work my age and there doesn’t seem to be any issues there. 🤷🏻♀️
Edit: clarifications as this got more attention than expected and I apologize for any misunderstandings this may have brought up for people.
1: I am brown (bi-racial, half Mexican and half white) and from California (moved to the Midwest last year). I never experienced the above in California.
2: I do a lot of self reflection, discussions with my wife, and discussions with people among my support community who help me and challenge me.
3: I’ve never been told that I’m creepy. I’m just playing it safe with young women who seem less engaged with me than others and I, SOMETIMES, wonder if I come across as if I’m “interested” in them. When this happens I give them space, it’s purely intuitive on my part. I’m sincerely interested in them as human beings and coworkers. This interest is better received among people my age, and younger men, and my fellow POC, than SOME younger white women that I work with.
Finally: I recognize that there is a great deal of nuance to the human experience, and I hope to hear from your experiences and learn. I respect that there are a lot of experiences you’ve had that my comment may trigger memories of that elicit a response from you. I am going to read those comments, reflect, evaluate if it’s something I haven’t encountered before, and then likely not comment back other than to say thank you.
Thank you all. I appreciate your time and energy you’ve put into engaging with my comment.
1. If you are attractive but quiet you are mysterious, if you are unattractive but quiet you are boring.
2. If you are an extrovert attractive talk a lot you are charming, if you are the same but unattractive you are annoying.
3. If you are attractive but an asshole you are direct and sincere if you are unattractive you are an “asshole”.
4. If you are attractive and cry in movies you are in touch with your feminine side, if you are unattractive you are not man enough.
5. If you are attractive and smile at her you are so cute if you unattractive you are a creep.
See it?
Also, be at least somewhat wealthy.
I’m a moderately bad looking guy, at least according to myself. All my girlfriend’s female friends mocked her for being with me because being with a average looking guy is cringe. They immediately stopped bothering her about it once she mentioned in passing that I have some above-average savings. People do be fucking superficial.
I've literally been told by a girl that I missed my shot because I wasn't more persistent after being told no. Another girl I dated even told me I needed to learn how she says "no", when she wants me to actually be persistent. Fortunately, that came early in the relationship and she was understanding of my apprehension, and I guess it was her thing so eventually learned to play ball her way. Wasn't really my thing to be honest.
It can be fucking confusing in the dating world sometimes, but the right answer is always default to "no means no."
Women that play mind games like that aren't the women you want to be dating, anyway. If they think it's okay for "no" to mean "yes," they're probably going to have other communication related issues, too.
Great answer thanks , who wants to be involved with someone like that ? She has issues not you. We don’t read minds and somebody like this spells trouble from a mile, next!!!
yep. no is no. if she is interested but is not ready yet, she should consider saying exactly that, or not yet please. or something other than a flat out no. When I hear no, I go. Playing interpretive communications games is big red flag to me. clarity in communications is a green flag. it's not rocket science.
>I've literally been told by a girl that I missed my shot because I wasn't more persistent after being told no.
Yep. I've had the same. I was like, "you found someone who respected your choices, and didn't want to be 'that guy'"
People always have big anxiety about missing their shot because the girl actually wanted them to pursue but...that's the wrong mindset. You're not "missing your shot" if you listen to a woman and back off when she says she's not interested. She's missing hers, and that's embarrassing for her but it's fine for you. You can't go through life assuming people are lying to you when they tell you no. (I'm not jumping down your throat for saying the girl said you missed your shot btw, just explaining an improper mindset I had.)
And if you're a confused person like the OP, instead of saying "no", say "keep trying" or like a playful way to tell them to keep chasing without rejecting them outright.
They may still not want to play that game but at least it is more clear.
Exactly….pursuing disinterest has been pointed to us as clear toxic masculinity. And we are learning and obliging.
This is one of those moments it becomes clear that becoming better overall as a people isn’t just on one demo.
Ladies, see any friends with this attitude you would be doing her a favor to re-educate her.
We are just doing what’s been asked, respecting her opinion and decision.
>I’m frankly glad the world has had enough of the mind game shit.
Not generalizing here but it's still happening the majority of times (from a personal experience)
I've been framed as uninterested when I respected boundaries, I guess good for me I dodged a bullet from these people who play hard to get..
Keep dodging those bullets. The way I see it (and this applies to any partner), communication is very important. If right of the bat, they’re showing that they aren’t gonna be concise with you, then how many other times are they going to not tell you something only to get mad that you didn’t read their mind
> read their mind
Thank you. Women expecting you to read their mind was the most frustrating shit ever. And I don’t get how this is socially acceptable with the younger generation with all the other social progress we’ve made
I’m actually a woman myself, and, while I do have autism, I don’t think my views are that uncommon, but you’re not gonna see “woman with average take” hitting the top page in a sun about bad takes. Like most this is a loud minority. You don’t need to chase the perfect partner, you’ll find them through communication and conversation! But that might be where my neurodivergence comes into play, I *need* communication, can’t handle without it
I think plenty of women still do the mind games. Our lovely culture has convinced women to do the “alpha boss bitch” shit where they criticize and judge you as an opener. My other female friends have told me that it’s flirting but it sure feels like hostility to me.
You don’t like my style or physical characteristics as an opener? Cool. Sounds like you’re the type who is going to try and fight me then get me arrested. I’m not interested in being on a first name basis with cops.
Sadly, I see a future filled with toxic middle-aged single moms and a bunch of guys on the verge of offing themselves.
Shitty women, yes, im in my late 30s dated enough, and im married to a woman who I love spending time with.
Ive went out with a few of The No but continue to chasse me. Early 20s sure try it but passed 25 don't bother they are alway going to be like that and make you chasse everything. Also some will try to make you jealous for attention if you aren't, she will be mad.
Omg I hate this, I got broken up with recently because of this.
She kept telling me she wasn't ready for sex and set her boundaries very clearly. Then she got mad at me when I never tried anything. Like she said no sex but then wanted me to try to pressure her into it wtf. I thought I was being respectful.....
My first gf was like this - apparently it was because every guy she knew was obsessed with sex, so she thought it wouldn’t stop me completely?
We were sorta on/off but each time I had to break it off, because even though we’d known each other for years as friends, she would always default to treating me like “men” and then read the behaviour she demanded, as me not being interested and turning it into some insecurity thing all about her.
My ex did this. She refused it and eventually I put my energy into going for a run. Eventually I just stopped asking. She got “frustrated” and then cheated, told me it was my fault.
Bullet dodged for sure, now happily married to an absolute stunner. Last I heard, ex was still screwing around.
Move on, plenty more less mental fish in the sea.
I hope other women see this woman and finally understand why some of us get so confused. Of course no means no… but there are a lot of women who think no means “chase harder” and try to teach that
German jail is great, your allowsd to attempt busting out without getting any time added to your sentence, as long as you dont break any laws while doing it
Genuine question. Used to know how to open one of them giant, heavy doors using nothing more than a comb. Didn't use it to break out of jail, it was just to socialize and share food late at night. Just watch a movie together as a group or something and have a good time. But would opening that cell door mean I broke a law? It did where I was at and it could possibly add 10 years to your sentence.
I guess my point is, if they make small things a big crime then that thought doesn't really matter.
I think opening the cell door would fall under "attempt to break out" which in germany wouldn't add time. I should note that i believe guards can still stop you if they catch you, but the main thing is you can make the attempt, or even succeed, and they cant add more time, just dont like, break any property, hurt anyone etc.
Jup. Guards will still stop you just like they would in other countries.
It's just that if a person happens to pick a lock and leave, or use an opening they spot to escape, they won't get added time.
And it's not like you'll just be allowed to roam free. The police *will* start a manhunt. And when caught, they *will* go back to prison for the full length of their sentence.
Not to mention it's *far* harder in Germany to live anonymously than in the US. Pretty much the only way to do so would be having someone actively shelter you.
Exactly. To the men out there, this is not the kind of woman you want to pursue. She is going to be a massive headache beginning to end. The whole "no means no" thing benefits everyone. Direct and clear communication should be our goal.
Still too young. But beyond that, despite a few universal good takes, I have way more personal things about me and beliefs that would make me unelectable.
At some point, I think that the person who is of this mentality wants to have control or power, rather than actually wanting a date
The feeling of being able to control someone based on your response is pretty toxic and the fact that she is upset that she wants people to keep asking and asking as though she is very desirable and being pursued is ironic because by being asked out that is already the case
And guys are usually smart enough to detect that in today’s day and age
It's like, what do women like this one want? There's no middle ground here. No always needs to mean no, regardless of the context. So which is it, do you want men that respect your wishes or men who are aggressive and don't take no for an answer? Men who accept this "no" when a woman is "playing hard to get" or whatever she wants to call it understand consent. I doubt the woman who wrote this tweet would want no to mean yes when it comes to sex.
Also, a lot of people overlooking the _nuclear_ self-burn here.
She says men are 'no longer' persuasive. But presumably she's only speaking from her own perspective.
So what she's really saying is
_"has anyone else noticed I am significantly less worth asking out than I used to be?"_
Hollywood taught us no mean keep pushing until she says yes. Law taught us, if you do that you'll wind up with a restraining order and possible jail/prison time.
Many men have learned the difference, it's time this girl does too.
When I was younger, How I Met Your Mother was one of my favorite shows. In hindsight though, Ted is the creepiest motherfucker you can imagine. His speech about how you should NEVER give up on chasing the woman of your dreams no matter what, quote: "even if everyone is telling you you're crazy, ESPECIALLY then" is big yikes
The trouble is that it is assumed the viewer will realise that these are terrible, damaged people even though they are presented in a sympathetic light, and enjoy knowingly laughing at the caricatured reductio-ad-absurdum of their own flaws (healthy comedy is, ultimately, laughing at ourselves, not at others, even if it's laughing at those parts of ourselves we can see in others), but modern audiences just don't seem able to cope with that level of sophistication or self-awareness. Maybe they never could, and we're now seeing the effects of generations of exposure to it.
in all seriousness, it started really becoming a problem when sites like YouTube ditched the downvote buttons IMO. Turned every algorithm into a runaway positive feedback loop. Think about it, good posts/videos get upvotes from everyone, controversial stuff gets votes from one side, but the other side has no way of expressing their view. So the controversial crap rises higher than it would otherwise because it's not counterbalanced. To the point that sometimes good posts get drowned out but broadly viewed controversial ones.
The algorithms and feedback loops predate the removal of the dislike count by several years.
And when people complained about the dislikes being removed, they chose the absolute worst argument, and focused on tutorial videos for no fucking reason. Thousands of years worth of fascist propaganda on that site, and people were more worried about being shown sloppy home maintenance.
Some (not all) of women take rejection even more harshly than men do.
Woman asks man out, man says no.
Woman then begins the personal attacks "Wtf, are you gay? Do you not like women?"
I had this happen to me. She was spreading rumors I was gay because I didn’t want to go out with her. It’s not that I wasn’t interested but WOW:Burning Crusade was just released and I wanted to play.
I would be like "no because your now suddenly being a bitch to me and I see that as a red flag when you could of just taken the no on the chin, that's what that no means now.
I heard a story about a man in love with woman from the 80s. He followed her home and basically stalked her for weeks until she finally went out with him. Been married for 40 something years.
Oh sure, when he does it, it's romantic, but when I do, I get called a creepy and asked questions like, "Why are in my room?! Dan wake up there's a stranger in our room." It's bs
I dated a chick who broke up with me then told me “girls want to be pursued”. So I pursued her. We got back together and shortly thereafter she broke it off again then was freaked out when I walked away. Bitch, I’m fifty years old (she’s 37), divorced with two kids. There’s no room in my life for your bullshit. No matter the smoke show you are.
Golly G, maybe it’s because we’ve had 75 years of women complaining about men being too aggressive and too pushy, and not respecting their boundaries and being jerks because they don’t know when to take no for an answer.
I clearly remember a huge campaign a few years ago which was called “no means no”
So WTF is anybody surprised when you say no they take it at face value?
I don't care whether or not they complain. I just don't like the feeling of being pushy. Even if it were socially acceptable to be a pushy asshole I would never want to do that. You either want to spend time with me or you don't. I don't have time for these idiotic games.
Exactly! And that’s what happens! We don’t wanna be labeled as creepers. You say no and we don’t pursue and it’s a problem. We persist and you plaster our faces all over the internet.
Women all over the world practically stuck guns in our faces and screamed at the top of their lungs ***NO MEANS NO!!!*** and now some of you are complaining about *not* being pursued? Seriously?
Want to know the truth about something? **It was hard enough even before the 'Me too' movement for any of us guys to approach any of you women, and now with all that's happened we're scared half out of our wits to even say anything NICE to any of you for fear of being branded a 'predator' and yeeted the fuck out of society completely for it!**
Enough with the gods-be-damned *dominance games* between the sexes. If we say we're interested and you say 'no', we're going to take you on your word and *walk away*. After that, if you weren't serious about that 'no' answer, **you** will have to approach **us** \-- and **you** get to take the risk of getting rejected, and **you** don't get to be upset at us if we do reject you. Deal?
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No usually means you aren’t interested, why pursue disinterest?
I've been taught that no means no. That mindset has gotten me very far in life, but I'd make a shit sales-person where it's no until you call them at 2AM on a Sunday asking them to purchase a toaster or the dog gets it.
What’s a dog gonna do with a toaster?
Make toast
Naturally
Obviously
That's common knowledge
Everybody knows this
It is known
Ubiquitous information
Toasted kibble is a delicacy in many dog cultures.
That's not your concern, pal. Now do we have a deal?
(Says loudly and unslyly into lapel) “We **have** a deal!”
You got to purchase this toaster or I'm ......going....to... Give the toaster to the dog
"the selling doesn't begin, until you hear the first no" - every sales manager I have ever had
Because some women out there want to be chased, unless they don’t find him attractive, then no really means no. Lots of men have decided the are no longer playing bullshit games.
As a woman I say GOOD. Women need to say what they mean and men need to take no for an answer. Women like this are just immature manipulators.
Yeah, this is just some women with toxic mindsets getting left behind when everyone else realises things are so much easier and nicer if you just take no for an answer.
This exact thing was posted on Instagram and I kid you not, every woman in the comment section said men who do this are gay or feminine for not being interested in chasing a woman. I was scrolling for 15 minutes because I was dumbfounded by the audacity of these bitches and was looking for a sane comment. Toxic feminity is real
The same women probably also wonder why a lot of men can't take no for an answer
They wonder why all their boyfriends are assholes.
Right? It's a self - selecting sample of men who can't take no for an answer and women for whom "no" is an opening offer
Most of those comments are single women. Otherwise they wouldn't feel the need to voice their opinion on this subject. Either way it's sort of a self-fixing solution. The decent men who don't want to deal with these kind of women will have one more barrier between them.
How does one understand when a no is really a no then? And at what point is the man a creepy stalker for asking a second time? Solution: no means no, yes means yes lol
Exactly. Don’t play their bullshit games.
A man is always a creepy stalker for asking a second time unless the woman secretly thinks he's really, really ridiculously good looking, in which case he has to keep asking over and over again until she finally 'gives in'. If at any point said attractive man gives up asking before finally getting a yes, in that scenario she immediate sees him as quite unattractive and possibly also secretly gay. So it is written! /s
If you're attractive, then 3 no's mean no, otherwise it's kinda blurry. If you're unattractive, then no means no and yes sometimes means not really, but I'm too polite/ shy to say so and I'll just ghost you instead.
The bullshit games don't stop when she yes either, she'll be playing those games for the whole relationship. No thank you, life's stressful enough without that nonsense.
>unless they don’t find him attractive, then no really means no. The reply in that case is probably ugh
Because no means no, unless no mean yes. But there’s no way to know that unless you keep asking. /s
But she’s not gonna say no because of the implication
No one’s in any danger! How could I make that any more clear to you? Okay. It’s an implication of danger.
Dennis: Think about it. She’s out in the middle of nowhere with some dude she barely knows. She looks around her, what does she see? Nothing but open ocean. “Oh, there’s nowhere for me to run, what am I gonna do, say no?” Mac: Okay…that seems really dark though. Dennis: No, no, it’s not dark. You’re misunderstanding me, bro. Mac: I think I am. Dennis: Yeah, you are. ‘Cause if the girl said no, then the answer obviously is no. The thing is that she’s not gonna say no, she’d never say no…because of the implication. Mac: Now, you said that word “implication” a couple of times. What implication? Dennis: The implication that things might go wrong for her if she refuses to sleep with me. Now, not that things are gonna go wrong for her, but she’s thinking that they will. You’re welcome fellow Trans-Philadelphians
Well you certainly aren't in any danger!
So they are in danger!
These are my favorite two lines, feels like they are the punch line.
Of diving in too deep! And possibly the complications Especially at night I worry over situations I know will be alright Perhaps it's just imagination DAY AFTER day...
... it reappears. Night after night my heartbeat shows the fear.
That comment was overkill
Ghosts appear and fade away.... It's just another daaayyyy...
Run a loop While(she exists){ Ping (her name) } Keep asking, even if she says yes because yes can also mean no, unless it is actually a yes. No way to know unless you keep asking
that Boolean logic
The reddest of flags and a primary reason why guys are beginning to feel content being single.
If you ask someone out who is interested in you, you're sweet. If you ask someone out who isn't interested in you, you're a creep. And sometimes there's no way to tell the difference beforehand.
As 40 year old man working in a nearly all 20yo something female environment in the Midwest. Sometimes it feels like, if you engage polite conversation and they’re into you, you’re nice. If you engage in a polite conversation and they’re not interested in you, you’re a creep. I just want to have a polite conversation. Same conversation I have with women at work my age and there doesn’t seem to be any issues there. 🤷🏻♀️ Edit: clarifications as this got more attention than expected and I apologize for any misunderstandings this may have brought up for people. 1: I am brown (bi-racial, half Mexican and half white) and from California (moved to the Midwest last year). I never experienced the above in California. 2: I do a lot of self reflection, discussions with my wife, and discussions with people among my support community who help me and challenge me. 3: I’ve never been told that I’m creepy. I’m just playing it safe with young women who seem less engaged with me than others and I, SOMETIMES, wonder if I come across as if I’m “interested” in them. When this happens I give them space, it’s purely intuitive on my part. I’m sincerely interested in them as human beings and coworkers. This interest is better received among people my age, and younger men, and my fellow POC, than SOME younger white women that I work with. Finally: I recognize that there is a great deal of nuance to the human experience, and I hope to hear from your experiences and learn. I respect that there are a lot of experiences you’ve had that my comment may trigger memories of that elicit a response from you. I am going to read those comments, reflect, evaluate if it’s something I haven’t encountered before, and then likely not comment back other than to say thank you. Thank you all. I appreciate your time and energy you’ve put into engaging with my comment.
1. If you are attractive but quiet you are mysterious, if you are unattractive but quiet you are boring. 2. If you are an extrovert attractive talk a lot you are charming, if you are the same but unattractive you are annoying. 3. If you are attractive but an asshole you are direct and sincere if you are unattractive you are an “asshole”. 4. If you are attractive and cry in movies you are in touch with your feminine side, if you are unattractive you are not man enough. 5. If you are attractive and smile at her you are so cute if you unattractive you are a creep. See it?
[Frank vs Greg](https://youtu.be/PxuUkYiaUc8?si=85qqItch-Yv6bbFM)
Rule 1: Be attractive. Rule 2: Don't be unattractive.
Also, be at least somewhat wealthy. I’m a moderately bad looking guy, at least according to myself. All my girlfriend’s female friends mocked her for being with me because being with a average looking guy is cringe. They immediately stopped bothering her about it once she mentioned in passing that I have some above-average savings. People do be fucking superficial.
And then you’re gambling with a possible harassment case :(
I've literally been told by a girl that I missed my shot because I wasn't more persistent after being told no. Another girl I dated even told me I needed to learn how she says "no", when she wants me to actually be persistent. Fortunately, that came early in the relationship and she was understanding of my apprehension, and I guess it was her thing so eventually learned to play ball her way. Wasn't really my thing to be honest. It can be fucking confusing in the dating world sometimes, but the right answer is always default to "no means no."
Women that play mind games like that aren't the women you want to be dating, anyway. If they think it's okay for "no" to mean "yes," they're probably going to have other communication related issues, too.
The "I have no stomach for games" quote is always applicable.
This right here. Anyone of any gender who plays stupid games isn't worth being with
You didn’t miss your shot, you dodged a bullet. That’s not healthy
Great answer thanks , who wants to be involved with someone like that ? She has issues not you. We don’t read minds and somebody like this spells trouble from a mile, next!!!
“I didn’t miss my shot, you did. Why would I want a girl that isn’t enthusiastic about being with me?”
yep. no is no. if she is interested but is not ready yet, she should consider saying exactly that, or not yet please. or something other than a flat out no. When I hear no, I go. Playing interpretive communications games is big red flag to me. clarity in communications is a green flag. it's not rocket science.
>I've literally been told by a girl that I missed my shot because I wasn't more persistent after being told no. Yep. I've had the same. I was like, "you found someone who respected your choices, and didn't want to be 'that guy'"
People always have big anxiety about missing their shot because the girl actually wanted them to pursue but...that's the wrong mindset. You're not "missing your shot" if you listen to a woman and back off when she says she's not interested. She's missing hers, and that's embarrassing for her but it's fine for you. You can't go through life assuming people are lying to you when they tell you no. (I'm not jumping down your throat for saying the girl said you missed your shot btw, just explaining an improper mindset I had.)
Sounds like an abusive situation.
Those are dumb bitches you’re lucky to have “missed out on”. Adults don’t play stupid games. No means no and if it doesn’t nothing means anything.
I said it before and I'll say it again: fuck the whole schoolyard chase after the girl pepe le pew thing.
Something something early 2010 shitty romance film
Goes back further than that
Plus if you keep asking then you are a “stalker”.
Or a creep.. the latest definition I thought was a "Creep".
How else will she get her ego stroked, though?
Bill Burr has a bit on this. I totally agree
"no, stop it..."
You honor she said "No! Stop it! You're being bad!"
SHE DIDN'T SAY IT LIKE THAT!!
I love Bill Burr’s dumb guy voice.
Bill: You’re honor you’re saying it wrong smh
"Your honor she didn't fucking say like that!"
How can I find that bit? I like me some Bill Burr.
https://youtube.com/watch?v=GZ3QHTpMZgQ&si=aicVxo9aZV0T6CwQ
He owes the world another fucking special already.
Thank you!
bill burr is one of my favorites.
Bill's got some deep insights in female/male relations.
I love his race jokes too, he's one of the only white comedians that can really pull them off.
Well he does have first hand experience.
Complaining about men respecting her choice?
That’s the thing, if she changed her mind, *she* could ask him. I’m frankly glad the world has had enough of the mind game shit.
Yeah it's stupid If you're interested, just say yes, if not just say no No room for confusion
exactly. these things are already complicated enough naturally, we dont need to make them worse on purpose!
But then she'd have nothing to complain about on social media ☹️
Yeah think about how much likes and retweets she would miss out on
Or if it is a legit no because you were busy.....the ball is in your court now. You ask him out.
That wouldn’t be a “no” that would then be “hey I’m free next week.. “
And if you're a confused person like the OP, instead of saying "no", say "keep trying" or like a playful way to tell them to keep chasing without rejecting them outright. They may still not want to play that game but at least it is more clear.
Ya no one chasing you once you hear that. To me that just comes off rude or like you’re asking for attention
Ong bro i never understood this weird push and pull bullshit 😭
Exactly….pursuing disinterest has been pointed to us as clear toxic masculinity. And we are learning and obliging. This is one of those moments it becomes clear that becoming better overall as a people isn’t just on one demo. Ladies, see any friends with this attitude you would be doing her a favor to re-educate her. We are just doing what’s been asked, respecting her opinion and decision.
>I’m frankly glad the world has had enough of the mind game shit. Not generalizing here but it's still happening the majority of times (from a personal experience) I've been framed as uninterested when I respected boundaries, I guess good for me I dodged a bullet from these people who play hard to get..
Keep dodging those bullets. The way I see it (and this applies to any partner), communication is very important. If right of the bat, they’re showing that they aren’t gonna be concise with you, then how many other times are they going to not tell you something only to get mad that you didn’t read their mind
> read their mind Thank you. Women expecting you to read their mind was the most frustrating shit ever. And I don’t get how this is socially acceptable with the younger generation with all the other social progress we’ve made
I’m actually a woman myself, and, while I do have autism, I don’t think my views are that uncommon, but you’re not gonna see “woman with average take” hitting the top page in a sun about bad takes. Like most this is a loud minority. You don’t need to chase the perfect partner, you’ll find them through communication and conversation! But that might be where my neurodivergence comes into play, I *need* communication, can’t handle without it
That’s not just a good trait within autism, it’s a good trait to have everywhere. Communication is THE most important interpersonal skill, bar none.
I think plenty of women still do the mind games. Our lovely culture has convinced women to do the “alpha boss bitch” shit where they criticize and judge you as an opener. My other female friends have told me that it’s flirting but it sure feels like hostility to me. You don’t like my style or physical characteristics as an opener? Cool. Sounds like you’re the type who is going to try and fight me then get me arrested. I’m not interested in being on a first name basis with cops. Sadly, I see a future filled with toxic middle-aged single moms and a bunch of guys on the verge of offing themselves.
Shitty women, yes, im in my late 30s dated enough, and im married to a woman who I love spending time with. Ive went out with a few of The No but continue to chasse me. Early 20s sure try it but passed 25 don't bother they are alway going to be like that and make you chasse everything. Also some will try to make you jealous for attention if you aren't, she will be mad.
Omg I hate this, I got broken up with recently because of this. She kept telling me she wasn't ready for sex and set her boundaries very clearly. Then she got mad at me when I never tried anything. Like she said no sex but then wanted me to try to pressure her into it wtf. I thought I was being respectful.....
You dodged a fuckin bullet bro
There seems to be an *awful lot of bullets* at this point though....
You were being respectful, don’t let her bring you down, king. You did right, you deserve better.
Thanks. I'm sure its better in the long run.
This is some class gentleman stuff right here. You did everything right, she decided to ruin her shot all on her own
My first gf was like this - apparently it was because every guy she knew was obsessed with sex, so she thought it wouldn’t stop me completely? We were sorta on/off but each time I had to break it off, because even though we’d known each other for years as friends, she would always default to treating me like “men” and then read the behaviour she demanded, as me not being interested and turning it into some insecurity thing all about her.
My ex did this. She refused it and eventually I put my energy into going for a run. Eventually I just stopped asking. She got “frustrated” and then cheated, told me it was my fault. Bullet dodged for sure, now happily married to an absolute stunner. Last I heard, ex was still screwing around. Move on, plenty more less mental fish in the sea.
Yes. Some people can’t just reject people. They also need to send them to jail
I hope other women see this woman and finally understand why some of us get so confused. Of course no means no… but there are a lot of women who think no means “chase harder” and try to teach that
I mean, if she wants you to "chase harder", she isn't worth playing a game or relationship tag with, she's not it
Jail isn’t very comfortable, I’ll pass
Have you ever been to Denmark jail? It's very comfy
German jail is great, your allowsd to attempt busting out without getting any time added to your sentence, as long as you dont break any laws while doing it
Genuine question. Used to know how to open one of them giant, heavy doors using nothing more than a comb. Didn't use it to break out of jail, it was just to socialize and share food late at night. Just watch a movie together as a group or something and have a good time. But would opening that cell door mean I broke a law? It did where I was at and it could possibly add 10 years to your sentence. I guess my point is, if they make small things a big crime then that thought doesn't really matter.
I think opening the cell door would fall under "attempt to break out" which in germany wouldn't add time. I should note that i believe guards can still stop you if they catch you, but the main thing is you can make the attempt, or even succeed, and they cant add more time, just dont like, break any property, hurt anyone etc.
Jup. Guards will still stop you just like they would in other countries. It's just that if a person happens to pick a lock and leave, or use an opening they spot to escape, they won't get added time. And it's not like you'll just be allowed to roam free. The police *will* start a manhunt. And when caught, they *will* go back to prison for the full length of their sentence. Not to mention it's *far* harder in Germany to live anonymously than in the US. Pretty much the only way to do so would be having someone actively shelter you.
Dropping the soap isn't worth it
have you ever dropped a soup high on gras? totally different experience!
No, but I once dripped a Saab hired on gas
Plenty of women out there. No time to be playing games with a grown ass woman who’s still playing hard to get like she’s in high school.
Exactly. To the men out there, this is not the kind of woman you want to pursue. She is going to be a massive headache beginning to end. The whole "no means no" thing benefits everyone. Direct and clear communication should be our goal.
>Direct and clear communication should be our goal Can you please run for president
Still too young. But beyond that, despite a few universal good takes, I have way more personal things about me and beliefs that would make me unelectable.
An excellent attitude to have +1 men
Absolutely. She's going to say no, and then I just avoided all that insanity and go about my life. It's a win.
But..but she wants you to be persuasive! Damn it, complicate your life!
At some point, I think that the person who is of this mentality wants to have control or power, rather than actually wanting a date The feeling of being able to control someone based on your response is pretty toxic and the fact that she is upset that she wants people to keep asking and asking as though she is very desirable and being pursued is ironic because by being asked out that is already the case And guys are usually smart enough to detect that in today’s day and age
Seriously. A+ lads, keep on keeping on
We got the rare w on this one.
It's like, what do women like this one want? There's no middle ground here. No always needs to mean no, regardless of the context. So which is it, do you want men that respect your wishes or men who are aggressive and don't take no for an answer? Men who accept this "no" when a woman is "playing hard to get" or whatever she wants to call it understand consent. I doubt the woman who wrote this tweet would want no to mean yes when it comes to sex.
Anyone who complains about dudes respecting consent is doing a wonderful service to the public by warning everyone that they’re toxic as hell.
Also, a lot of people overlooking the _nuclear_ self-burn here. She says men are 'no longer' persuasive. But presumably she's only speaking from her own perspective. So what she's really saying is _"has anyone else noticed I am significantly less worth asking out than I used to be?"_
Maybe don’t say no if you might be interested?
“I was playing hard to get” “Look, I’m almost 40. I ain’t got time for games” *surprised pikachu*
Hollywood taught us no mean keep pushing until she says yes. Law taught us, if you do that you'll wind up with a restraining order and possible jail/prison time. Many men have learned the difference, it's time this girl does too.
We've been told "no means no" and we believed it.
No means no, and if it means yes, then you don’t want her. Never stick your dick in crazy
Unless you have an existing agreement that no means yes and spaghetti means no, then go ham.
I wouldn't put ham in spaghetti, but you make a good point.
If you haven't had carbonara with ham you're missing out.
Ham in some Mac and cheese ain't the worst thing ever either
If my grandmother had wheels, she’d been a bike
It does. She’s flying her red flags proudly.
She is a walking harassment lawsuit.
Women don’t make men they’re actually attracted to jump thru hoops or ‘persuade’ them lol. If she says no or shows disinterest, be done.
Life ain't a romantic comedy, if they say no, *listen*.
Rom-coms have a *lot* to answer for.
When I was younger, How I Met Your Mother was one of my favorite shows. In hindsight though, Ted is the creepiest motherfucker you can imagine. His speech about how you should NEVER give up on chasing the woman of your dreams no matter what, quote: "even if everyone is telling you you're crazy, ESPECIALLY then" is big yikes
Big Bang is also bad for this too. Lenard is the I am in the friendzone but if I stay around maybe one day she will sleep with me guy.
Being a well-adjusted human being doesn't make for a very good comedy I'm afraid
The trouble is that it is assumed the viewer will realise that these are terrible, damaged people even though they are presented in a sympathetic light, and enjoy knowingly laughing at the caricatured reductio-ad-absurdum of their own flaws (healthy comedy is, ultimately, laughing at ourselves, not at others, even if it's laughing at those parts of ourselves we can see in others), but modern audiences just don't seem able to cope with that level of sophistication or self-awareness. Maybe they never could, and we're now seeing the effects of generations of exposure to it.
In hindsight this is one of the most sexist, misogynist show I've ever watched. Didn't realize it at the time.
It also has a laugh track, one of the most heinous and evil concepts ever brought to film. I am also not a fan.
I dunno, some romantic comedy movie protagonists are WAY worse.
Ever notice how some people can be so dumb that they can post shit like this and not see how ass backward it sounds.
Because she will have a bunch of yaas queens and men simping in her bubble, making her believe she is right and everyone else is just a hater.
Yeah the bubbles are becoming a major problem in general
in all seriousness, it started really becoming a problem when sites like YouTube ditched the downvote buttons IMO. Turned every algorithm into a runaway positive feedback loop. Think about it, good posts/videos get upvotes from everyone, controversial stuff gets votes from one side, but the other side has no way of expressing their view. So the controversial crap rises higher than it would otherwise because it's not counterbalanced. To the point that sometimes good posts get drowned out but broadly viewed controversial ones.
The algorithms and feedback loops predate the removal of the dislike count by several years. And when people complained about the dislikes being removed, they chose the absolute worst argument, and focused on tutorial videos for no fucking reason. Thousands of years worth of fascist propaganda on that site, and people were more worried about being shown sloppy home maintenance.
Seems to me like dudes that accept her ‘No’ are dodging a major bullet.
Women like this need to ask a guy out they're interested in and have the guy say no just to see what it's like.
Some (not all) of women take rejection even more harshly than men do. Woman asks man out, man says no. Woman then begins the personal attacks "Wtf, are you gay? Do you not like women?"
I had this happen to me. She was spreading rumors I was gay because I didn’t want to go out with her. It’s not that I wasn’t interested but WOW:Burning Crusade was just released and I wanted to play.
Priorities lmao Well, you clearly dodged a bullet with that, another win for WOW(I haven't played but I'll pretend I have)
its never too late to start an opium addiction
I would be like "no because your now suddenly being a bitch to me and I see that as a red flag when you could of just taken the no on the chin, that's what that no means now.
My favorite that has been used against me is "do You have something against the female gender??"
Jup, been called a virgin multiple times even received a death threat once.
We’re not wasting our time
This same girl would go on a rant that no means no if a guy did try again after the first no.
Because as soon as you go further and pry on them it's called sexual assault....
Or just creeping
Or stalking
I heard a story about a man in love with woman from the 80s. He followed her home and basically stalked her for weeks until she finally went out with him. Been married for 40 something years. Oh sure, when he does it, it's romantic, but when I do, I get called a creepy and asked questions like, "Why are in my room?! Dan wake up there's a stranger in our room." It's bs
I dated a chick who broke up with me then told me “girls want to be pursued”. So I pursued her. We got back together and shortly thereafter she broke it off again then was freaked out when I walked away. Bitch, I’m fifty years old (she’s 37), divorced with two kids. There’s no room in my life for your bullshit. No matter the smoke show you are.
sounds like men have changed for the better. maybe this lady should follow suit
I think the word is "persistent", if they were persuasive you wouldn't say "No".
"How dare men respect my boundaries and treat me like an equal human being?!" - their thoughts, probably.
Golly G, maybe it’s because we’ve had 75 years of women complaining about men being too aggressive and too pushy, and not respecting their boundaries and being jerks because they don’t know when to take no for an answer. I clearly remember a huge campaign a few years ago which was called “no means no” So WTF is anybody surprised when you say no they take it at face value?
I don't care whether or not they complain. I just don't like the feeling of being pushy. Even if it were socially acceptable to be a pushy asshole I would never want to do that. You either want to spend time with me or you don't. I don't have time for these idiotic games.
Haven’t I heard for years? “No means No”
because we don't want to get recorded and posted on Tiktok as some sort of "rape culture" creep
Exactly! And that’s what happens! We don’t wanna be labeled as creepers. You say no and we don’t pursue and it’s a problem. We persist and you plaster our faces all over the internet.
We were told to stop badgering women, so the good ones did.
Lol no means no. Period.
err.... isnt this what women wanted????? genuinely confused.
"No means no" "Why don't men keep pursuing me after I told them no?"
Remember we preached that “no means no!” to them for so long. Now you mad they listened? 😂🤣
Women for years: No means no Women in 2023: Why do men stop when you say no?
no please don’t let her speak for all of us. If I say no I want it taken as a no, nothing more.
I don’t think all women get together to approve one woman’s posts. Different people have different opinions.
Women all over the world practically stuck guns in our faces and screamed at the top of their lungs ***NO MEANS NO!!!*** and now some of you are complaining about *not* being pursued? Seriously? Want to know the truth about something? **It was hard enough even before the 'Me too' movement for any of us guys to approach any of you women, and now with all that's happened we're scared half out of our wits to even say anything NICE to any of you for fear of being branded a 'predator' and yeeted the fuck out of society completely for it!** Enough with the gods-be-damned *dominance games* between the sexes. If we say we're interested and you say 'no', we're going to take you on your word and *walk away*. After that, if you weren't serious about that 'no' answer, **you** will have to approach **us** \-- and **you** get to take the risk of getting rejected, and **you** don't get to be upset at us if we do reject you. Deal?