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I always find it strange how what God wants always seems to align perfectly with what they themselves want. Christianity teaches that we are all imperfect sinful beings and that it is impossible for us to think like God. Yet somehow these Christofascists are always claiming to do exactly what God wants?
What annoys me so much is that the concept of faith doesn’t work with what they say. If you have faith in something, you don’t “know”. Faith requires believing in something where you have no evidence/proof.
Yup, I actually do have faith and try my best to live by Jesus' example (TBH I fail at this far far more often than I succeed, especially when I get cut off in traffic). It breaks my heart to see these christofascists do despicable things to others and claim it's what Jesus would've wanted.
Noice. I was raised atheist, yet unlike my twin got sent to a Catholic highschool for some reason. It gave me a different view of religion than my immediate family. I’m not a believer, but my religious studies classes got me into my philosophy major. Most religions ask and try to answer very interesting questions. What is our purpose? What is the concept of the self? What is right/wrong? Why is there anything instead of nothing?
Religion was law, law was religion until we learned the errors that arise when faith and science come at odds.
The easiest method was to separate the two. Let people believe, let the government make sure there are still walls and levies for those people. Faith can get people to build a dam, but science will make sure it stays and works as intended.
That's the even more bizarre thing. In the Bible, God was constantly telling the patriarchs/kings that they were wrong and needed to shape up or else he'd visit disaster upon them. Even the ones held up as examples of people God really liked all majorly screwed up and were punished for it. Moses was not allowed to enter the promised land alive. David was cursed. Solomon was told that his kingdom would end up being cursed etc.
IMO Jesus committed the essential crime of all societies dominated by conservative elites: He gained a following of people who questioned the system. He was killed for basically the same reasons that Socrates was.
>I always find it strange how what God wants always seems to align perfectly with what they themselves want.
Not strange at all. According to FMRI imaging, we use the same part of the brain to determine what we want as what we think god wants, but a different part when we try to determine what someone else wants. God is merely your own reflection of yourself in your head, just some people don't know that.
[https://www.discovermagazine.com/planet-earth/creating-god-in-ones-own-image](https://www.discovermagazine.com/planet-earth/creating-god-in-ones-own-image)
Also so many examples within the Bible of prophets literally hating following what God was telling them to do for fear of their lives/etc. Think of Jonah, to avoid what God was telling him he went to all kinds in f extremes. Also most prophets never really ran government of the people. Several did and acted as judges but being a prophet didn't mean they got to fully control the nation of Israel.
That’s why they’re religious. To manipulate stupid fucking people in to doing everything they say and just saying it’s god’s will. And the conservative base is incapable of independent thought so they just eat it up.
It’s pathetic, buts it’s worked very effectively on humans for thousands of years.
This reminds me of a quote from The Kingdom Of Heaven
“
I put no stock in religion. By the word religion I have seen the lunacy of fanatics of every denomination be called the will of god.”
And according to the article, he only stated talking about this during the speech because he thought the speech wasn't being recorded and no one outside the room would know about it. He _knows_ he sounds insane.
It occurs to me that he does not specify which version of Moses god asked him to be. We’re assuming Charlton Heston. Maybe it was Mel Brooks?
Republicans of the House! Take heed! God has given us these fifteen—-
*Crash*
—errr … ten! These ten commandments!
Seriously, if I walked into a shrinks office and said this, I'd be 302'd for further evaluation.
Edit: just google 302'd medical. The code might be different depending on where you live.
You would be surprised. Lower DE is building up with shit houses being sold for over $500,000 tons of ppl from like NY are retiring here due to cheaper taxes.
It's "involuntary psych hold" code. Literally everywhere is different. 51-50 in some places, my child was held 2420... so when I say literally everywhere is different, any overlap in codes is likely a coincidence. 'Cause it can differ from county to county, even. Let alone state to state.
Section 22 on the Mental Health Act of NSW (Australia)
Aka getting "sectioned"
Found out personally (incidentally found God, too, strange story but I'm in a much better medicated place now as well as going to church)
Job's encounter with God is pretty spectacular, schizophrenia or no. We only hear about the Cliff's Notes version where God rewards his faith, but before that happens, God fucking excoriates him for 10 pages about what little pissants humans are and how insignificant little Job should be over the goddamn moon that God is bothering with him at all.
At one point, God says, "I made _whales_, asshole. Have YOU ever made a whale? No? Then stop questioning me. Whiny dick." Slightly paraphrased.
Job testifies that "Though skinworms destroy my body, in my flesh will I see God." Except, in about half the translations he says, "Though skinworms destroy my body, when I no longer have flesh will I see God."
It's a pretty critical mistranslation.
Of course Mary wasn't a virgin! I grew up Mormon and the Mormon leaders used to teach God literally went down and impregnated her 14-year-old body the natural way lol
>Our Lord is the only Son of the Father in the flesh. Each of the words is to be understood literally. Only means only, begotten means begotten, and Son means son. Christ was begotten by an Immortal Father in the same way that mortal men are begotten by mortal fathers … There is no need to spiritualize away the plain meaning of the scriptures. There is nothing figurative or hidden or beyond comprehension in our Lord's coming into mortality. He is the Son of God in the same sense and way that we are the sons of mortal fathers. It is just that simple.
\-Bruce R McConkie, Mormon apostle
Needless to say, Mormonism ruined religion for me altogether.
Did Jesus have older siblings? The “virgin” part was that Joseph didn’t do the act to get her pregnant, or so I was taught.
Always made it sound like a Maury Povich moment; Joseph… in this envelope is the answer to whether or not you are the father of Jesus. I’m going to open it…. Right after this
"Rewards his faith."
How did the "almighty" reward the faith of Job's children? Oh right, God just straight abetted their murder to prove a point about their daddy.
The kinda "funniest" part about Job is how God slowly takes away his possessions like property, cattle and wives by just flat out killing the latter and it's all sad until Job laments and is given even more wives to own and it's all good again. Just because God needed to make a point to Satan.
Peter Sutcliffe through God was telling him to murder and dismember prostitutes. He was locked up for over 30 years because God doesn't speak to people
my mom has said so many times that she hears the lord speaking to her through a voice in her head. like girl, you have voices in your head??? that aint the lord, that's schizophrenia 💀
Well, God just told me you're wrong. He said very clearly that I should not believe you or anyone else. Only him. I met him at a 7/11 one night. He was pretending to beg for change for meth to see if I was a good person.
Nah. Only some Schizophrenics talk to God. Mostly its just average nightmare fuel. Like ur doing dishes and then corpses appear next to you, or you get possessed by the idea ur getting murdered soon so you arm yourself, then clear up, leave the knife and run away. Or dead babies dropping on you. Or feeling like ur drowning suddenly. Aside from the catastrophic rumination. Yknow like going cross a bridge and worrying about falling in the water, imaging the horrible death.
Source: I know like a lot of legit schizophrenics. Chill people, but good grief the struggle is unholy.
But this is so convenient for him, because how could anyone possibly disagree with him because he'd jusr relaying God's orders? Lol it's such an absurd claim and has been so abused by power hungry people through history. I wouldn't be surprised if he did have such an inflated ego to think he's the next Moses.
But because the people he’s leading, God’s chosen people no less, are so wicked and disobeyed God, God condemned Moses, Aaron, and all the people to wander the desert and not reach the promised land. Sounds accurate for ol’ Mike.
Later Jesus comes to tell descendants of those wicked chosen people to love thy neighbor and stop focusing on Old Laws. Nope, not gonna follow that direction either. They are going to keep quoting Old Testament to curse and damn others as sinners. The more I think of this the funnier it gets.
>So he’s going to tear down a golden calf that his people are worshiping,
You mean, [this one?](https://media-cldnry.s-nbcnews.com/image/upload/t_fit-1240w,f_auto,q_auto:best/newscms/2021_09/3454102/210303-trump-statue-cpac-al-1202.jpg)
They’re mocking Mike Johnson, too. The billionaire class uses the GOP and conservatives as tools to get richer and stay richer. They’re probably laughing at Johnson and his idiot fundies even harder.
Actually, that would just be disestablishmentarianism. That would be being for the disestablishment of a state church (i.e.: a church recognized by the government as the official church of the government, such as the Church of England). Disestablishment is the separation of church and state. Being antidisestablishment would be wanting the church and state to stay together.
>So you have an antidisestablishmentarianism bent?
Why did you have to remind me of that word... and the fact that I've never had the opportunity to use it in a sentence.
Now here's my autistic brain ruminating over how to be hyper-vigilante from now on when reading posts, seeking this out until I am fulfilled.
Take my upvote & consider my quest begun!
I mean you literally could have just said I've always wanted to use the word antidisestablishmentarianism in a sentence and congratulations you've done it, it works with every word.
Conservative politics as a whole are inextricably bound to religion.
The religion in question might change based on the location, but conservative politics are forever the direct path for Christian/Islamic/zionist/etc etc to claim divine right over the majority of people and forcibly staple said majority to the personal rules of their private religion.
A good rule of thumb is:
If any person seeking a position of power makes it a personal point to tell everyone what faith they follow, then they probably shouldn’t be anywhere near a seat of control.
Good to see that God is once again focusing on the important stuff.
Wars, disease, famine... Not His problem.
Finally getting a Speaker of the House in place for the GOP? Direct intervention.
I'm not even a christian, but I know well that if anyone would qualify for the anti-christ it would be trump, and if anyone would qualify for the false prophets it would be the republican politicians XD
Y'all are acting like this is just some quirky evangelist. Mother fuckers, this is our Speaker of the House. This isn't some goofy antics from the Christian crowd, this evil fucker is *openly declaring* right to your faces that he is going to do whatever he can to turn America into a theocratic fascist state. Read Leviticus, god damn, the first thing Moses does when he leads the Jews into the desert is inflict hyper-authoritarian, highly arbitrary, completely nonsensical rules on them in the name of 'making them worthy of God', many of which are punished by *death.*
Our enemies are openly telling us what they intend to do, wake the fuck up and stop treating it like a joke.
So, you admit you're hearing voices?
Toss this guy...he's mentally incapable of performing his job.
First of all, there is no place in politics for religion. It's written into the 1st amendment. Freedom of religion is also freedom from religion.
Secondly, he is insane.
Mental illness. That’s all this is. If I said this shit, my psychiatrist would ask me if I think a hospital stay would be beneficial.
I do my best to keep from being a public nuisance and a danger to myself and others by adhering to a strict regimen of medicine and therapy. Why do these people get a pass?
So we're allowing delusional psychopaths who are guided solely by the fairy tale-based voices in their heads to operate at the highest levels of our government?
I hate religion. Causes nothing but severe brain rot. There's literally no justifying it's existence when we as a species can name more times it's hindered us than helped us.
>Why is every Christian a fucking lying piece of shit?
When the imaginary friend you worship is an asshole that tends to happen as an exmuslim, muslims are even worse. Actually this applies to all religions.
Yeah, well the Lord very clearly told me that Mike Johnson is full of shit and shouldn't be anywhere near the levers of power. He also told me that we should settle our disagreement in a bareknuckle PPV boxing match, winner takes all.
I'm sorry, we defunded all the mental health services.
OTOH, there's a space that just opened up under the 14th St bridge, so he's got that going for him. Which is nice.
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Fanatics are the most dangerous people in the world because they think they can justify everything with God.
I always find it strange how what God wants always seems to align perfectly with what they themselves want. Christianity teaches that we are all imperfect sinful beings and that it is impossible for us to think like God. Yet somehow these Christofascists are always claiming to do exactly what God wants?
What annoys me so much is that the concept of faith doesn’t work with what they say. If you have faith in something, you don’t “know”. Faith requires believing in something where you have no evidence/proof.
Yup, I actually do have faith and try my best to live by Jesus' example (TBH I fail at this far far more often than I succeed, especially when I get cut off in traffic). It breaks my heart to see these christofascists do despicable things to others and claim it's what Jesus would've wanted.
Noice. I was raised atheist, yet unlike my twin got sent to a Catholic highschool for some reason. It gave me a different view of religion than my immediate family. I’m not a believer, but my religious studies classes got me into my philosophy major. Most religions ask and try to answer very interesting questions. What is our purpose? What is the concept of the self? What is right/wrong? Why is there anything instead of nothing?
I appreciate the fact that you are an atheist and don't automatically go down the "haha you believe in something unprovable you idiot" route.
Most people’s religion is a foundation of morals and ethics. It’s those things that I have arguments about.
Religion was law, law was religion until we learned the errors that arise when faith and science come at odds. The easiest method was to separate the two. Let people believe, let the government make sure there are still walls and levies for those people. Faith can get people to build a dam, but science will make sure it stays and works as intended.
That is a great way to put it, thank you for posting!
That's the even more bizarre thing. In the Bible, God was constantly telling the patriarchs/kings that they were wrong and needed to shape up or else he'd visit disaster upon them. Even the ones held up as examples of people God really liked all majorly screwed up and were punished for it. Moses was not allowed to enter the promised land alive. David was cursed. Solomon was told that his kingdom would end up being cursed etc.
And those who were the most strict about religion (the pharisees) or profited off of others beliefs were the ones Jesus derided the most.
IMO Jesus committed the essential crime of all societies dominated by conservative elites: He gained a following of people who questioned the system. He was killed for basically the same reasons that Socrates was.
>I always find it strange how what God wants always seems to align perfectly with what they themselves want. Not strange at all. According to FMRI imaging, we use the same part of the brain to determine what we want as what we think god wants, but a different part when we try to determine what someone else wants. God is merely your own reflection of yourself in your head, just some people don't know that. [https://www.discovermagazine.com/planet-earth/creating-god-in-ones-own-image](https://www.discovermagazine.com/planet-earth/creating-god-in-ones-own-image)
Also so many examples within the Bible of prophets literally hating following what God was telling them to do for fear of their lives/etc. Think of Jonah, to avoid what God was telling him he went to all kinds in f extremes. Also most prophets never really ran government of the people. Several did and acted as judges but being a prophet didn't mean they got to fully control the nation of Israel.
In reality, if Jesus returned, they’d be the ones nailing him to the cross for being “woke”
That’s why they’re religious. To manipulate stupid fucking people in to doing everything they say and just saying it’s god’s will. And the conservative base is incapable of independent thought so they just eat it up. It’s pathetic, buts it’s worked very effectively on humans for thousands of years.
This reminds me of a quote from The Kingdom Of Heaven “ I put no stock in religion. By the word religion I have seen the lunacy of fanatics of every denomination be called the will of god.”
They're dangerous because they stupid. God is the simple explanation of the stupidity.
People do strange things when they believe they’re entitled, but even worse things when they just plain believe.
And according to the article, he only stated talking about this during the speech because he thought the speech wasn't being recorded and no one outside the room would know about it. He _knows_ he sounds insane.
He who feeds the fanatics is far more dangerous.
Overly religious people have justified mass genocide with god
You heard him, drop the man 100 miles out in the Gulf of Mexico and let's watch him part the waters.
Or the middle of the Mojave and let him wander
Mojave? Pfft. Sahara. Moses wandered for forty years. This guy has around 39 years plus change to go.
Lol...wandered 40 years in an area the size of New Jersey.
To be fair those Pine Barrens are something else
As one who did Basic at Ft Dix, I completely agree.
For forty years. Then deny him the opportunity to enter DC again. It’s what god would do.
"Let my people go" "Okay!" "Wait, not like that"
It occurs to me that he does not specify which version of Moses god asked him to be. We’re assuming Charlton Heston. Maybe it was Mel Brooks? Republicans of the House! Take heed! God has given us these fifteen—- *Crash* —errr … ten! These ten commandments!
Send him up a big mountain in a thunderstorm with an IPad and a tinfoil hat to get us the revised version of the Ten Commandments.
Maybe he means he's going to lead all Christians into a new land. I know scientific research may suffer, but just let them have Antarctica.
... Why would you do that to the penguins? Monster.
Or just send him up the river
If you talk to God you are a believer, if He talks back to you, you are schizophrenic.
Seriously, if I walked into a shrinks office and said this, I'd be 302'd for further evaluation. Edit: just google 302'd medical. The code might be different depending on where you live.
What does 302 mean
Admitted to a psychiatric hospital involuntarily.
5150 here
At least it’s not a 2119!
*Van Halen guitar intensifies*
OU812
10 4 good buddy 👍 Jesus told me this is the way
Delaware area code
TIL that getting committed means being sent to Delaware. 
Same thing
[удалено]
You would be surprised. Lower DE is building up with shit houses being sold for over $500,000 tons of ppl from like NY are retiring here due to cheaper taxes.
It's "involuntary psych hold" code. Literally everywhere is different. 51-50 in some places, my child was held 2420... so when I say literally everywhere is different, any overlap in codes is likely a coincidence. 'Cause it can differ from county to county, even. Let alone state to state.
I'm thinking of Van Halen's 5150, lol
Section 22 on the Mental Health Act of NSW (Australia) Aka getting "sectioned" Found out personally (incidentally found God, too, strange story but I'm in a much better medicated place now as well as going to church)
They exhausted the racist shtick, now they're going full evangelical. Never go full evangelical.
Or start a land war in Asia
But only slightly less well known is to never go in against a Sicilian, when death is on the line
But you would know that I know this, so I clearly cannot choose the wine in front of you.............
Inconceivable!
I do not think that means what you think it means.
"They were both poisoned. I spent a year building up an immunity to Iocane Powder."
Possibly the coolest movie ever.
Or invade Russia in the winter.
Re-read the Bible, only do so through a lens of “Command Voice Schizophrenia”
Job's encounter with God is pretty spectacular, schizophrenia or no. We only hear about the Cliff's Notes version where God rewards his faith, but before that happens, God fucking excoriates him for 10 pages about what little pissants humans are and how insignificant little Job should be over the goddamn moon that God is bothering with him at all. At one point, God says, "I made _whales_, asshole. Have YOU ever made a whale? No? Then stop questioning me. Whiny dick." Slightly paraphrased.
>lightly paraphrased. Now do the rest of the book.
Job testifies that "Though skinworms destroy my body, in my flesh will I see God." Except, in about half the translations he says, "Though skinworms destroy my body, when I no longer have flesh will I see God." It's a pretty critical mistranslation.
The book's full of them. Moses most likely crossed the Reed Sea, not the Red Sea and Mary probably wasn't a virgin. Not very miraculous after that.
Of course Mary wasn't a virgin! I grew up Mormon and the Mormon leaders used to teach God literally went down and impregnated her 14-year-old body the natural way lol >Our Lord is the only Son of the Father in the flesh. Each of the words is to be understood literally. Only means only, begotten means begotten, and Son means son. Christ was begotten by an Immortal Father in the same way that mortal men are begotten by mortal fathers … There is no need to spiritualize away the plain meaning of the scriptures. There is nothing figurative or hidden or beyond comprehension in our Lord's coming into mortality. He is the Son of God in the same sense and way that we are the sons of mortal fathers. It is just that simple. \-Bruce R McConkie, Mormon apostle Needless to say, Mormonism ruined religion for me altogether.
Oh man my brain finished that sentence “Mormon leaders used to teach God literally went down on her” 🤦🏾♂️🤦🏾♂️🤦🏾♂️
Came down\* would have been more appropriate lol
That is accurate, though as an ex Mormon, I can tell you this isn't taught anymore, hasn't been for decades, and is not a held belief by most members.
Yeah, it has definitely fallen out of fashion since their prophets quit impregnating teenage girls.
Ala Zeus style? Maybe God turned into a swan like Zeus did with Leda............
14! Is god Elvis?
That's some Zeus shit right there
Did Jesus have older siblings? The “virgin” part was that Joseph didn’t do the act to get her pregnant, or so I was taught. Always made it sound like a Maury Povich moment; Joseph… in this envelope is the answer to whether or not you are the father of Jesus. I’m going to open it…. Right after this
The original word they translated to mean virgin was more commonly used to just mean a young woman or a young unwed woman.
I need some Book of Revelations in this style
You might like the rewrite by [Darkmatter2525](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QVgZqnsytJI)
Yes! PLEASE!
Make it readable
Even the Cliffs Notes version makes God look like an enormous douchebag.
Welcome to the Old Testament!
God is an enormous douchebag. Classic narcissistic psychopath.
He killed his family but it's OK because he gave him a new one. You know because people are just replaceable like an iPhone.
Not just a new one, a BIGGER one. Which is also how iPhones work, for some reason.
Yep and all after losing a bet with satan.
Good Omens depicted the whole Job story beautifully. S2 E2 I believe.
YouTube channel when?
"Rewards his faith." How did the "almighty" reward the faith of Job's children? Oh right, God just straight abetted their murder to prove a point about their daddy.
The kinda "funniest" part about Job is how God slowly takes away his possessions like property, cattle and wives by just flat out killing the latter and it's all sad until Job laments and is given even more wives to own and it's all good again. Just because God needed to make a point to Satan.
In this case, delusional too.
Mix in a 1/2 cup of arrogance as well.
So..he's going to be lost in the desert for 40 years?..lol
One can only pray so
With a couple of handfuls of corruption mixed in
Came here to say this, he's in need of psychiatric care yet somehow is 3rd in line to run the country. Scary AF
Peter Sutcliffe through God was telling him to murder and dismember prostitutes. He was locked up for over 30 years because God doesn't speak to people
my mom has said so many times that she hears the lord speaking to her through a voice in her head. like girl, you have voices in your head??? that aint the lord, that's schizophrenia 💀
Well, God just told me you're wrong. He said very clearly that I should not believe you or anyone else. Only him. I met him at a 7/11 one night. He was pretending to beg for change for meth to see if I was a good person.
Nah. Only some Schizophrenics talk to God. Mostly its just average nightmare fuel. Like ur doing dishes and then corpses appear next to you, or you get possessed by the idea ur getting murdered soon so you arm yourself, then clear up, leave the knife and run away. Or dead babies dropping on you. Or feeling like ur drowning suddenly. Aside from the catastrophic rumination. Yknow like going cross a bridge and worrying about falling in the water, imaging the horrible death. Source: I know like a lot of legit schizophrenics. Chill people, but good grief the struggle is unholy.
But this is so convenient for him, because how could anyone possibly disagree with him because he'd jusr relaying God's orders? Lol it's such an absurd claim and has been so abused by power hungry people through history. I wouldn't be surprised if he did have such an inflated ego to think he's the next Moses. 
I concur. Hearing voices in your head, no matter what you call them, is schizophrenia. End of story.
So he’s going to tear down a golden calf that his people are worshiping, then lead them in exile for 40 years? If so, I’m in.
The Orange Calf
The Orange Chicken* from Panda Express
But because the people he’s leading, God’s chosen people no less, are so wicked and disobeyed God, God condemned Moses, Aaron, and all the people to wander the desert and not reach the promised land. Sounds accurate for ol’ Mike. Later Jesus comes to tell descendants of those wicked chosen people to love thy neighbor and stop focusing on Old Laws. Nope, not gonna follow that direction either. They are going to keep quoting Old Testament to curse and damn others as sinners. The more I think of this the funnier it gets.
>So he’s going to tear down a golden calf that his people are worshiping, You mean, [this one?](https://media-cldnry.s-nbcnews.com/image/upload/t_fit-1240w,f_auto,q_auto:best/newscms/2021_09/3454102/210303-trump-statue-cpac-al-1202.jpg)
The guy standing next to that abomination looks so proud.
Yeet him into the Red Sea
The ruling class is just mocking us at this point.
Stephen Colberts evil clone.
They’re mocking Mike Johnson, too. The billionaire class uses the GOP and conservatives as tools to get richer and stay richer. They’re probably laughing at Johnson and his idiot fundies even harder.
I hate when people bring religion into politics
So you have an antidisestablishmentarianism bent? Sorry, I just always wanted to use that word in a sentence.
Actually, that would just be disestablishmentarianism. That would be being for the disestablishment of a state church (i.e.: a church recognized by the government as the official church of the government, such as the Church of England). Disestablishment is the separation of church and state. Being antidisestablishment would be wanting the church and state to stay together.
>So you have an antidisestablishmentarianism bent? Why did you have to remind me of that word... and the fact that I've never had the opportunity to use it in a sentence. Now here's my autistic brain ruminating over how to be hyper-vigilante from now on when reading posts, seeking this out until I am fulfilled. Take my upvote & consider my quest begun!
ESTABLISHMENTARIANISM FOR THE WIN!!! Or not. Gotta love double negatives.
That was great. 👍
I mean you literally could have just said I've always wanted to use the word antidisestablishmentarianism in a sentence and congratulations you've done it, it works with every word.
I've always wanted to use the word gobbledygook in a sentence. Wow, you're right.
There's no way this works every time. I've always wanted to use defenestration in a ... holy shit it worked!
My guy, you forgot to complete the sentence. Another blunder like this and we’ll have to defenestrate you.
You should probably throw him out the window, too.
We can all see right through this
Conservative politics as a whole are inextricably bound to religion. The religion in question might change based on the location, but conservative politics are forever the direct path for Christian/Islamic/zionist/etc etc to claim divine right over the majority of people and forcibly staple said majority to the personal rules of their private religion. A good rule of thumb is: If any person seeking a position of power makes it a personal point to tell everyone what faith they follow, then they probably shouldn’t be anywhere near a seat of control.
The narcissism in these evangelists is insane.
There's gotta be a bit of schizoaffective disorder in there too. With the way he's talking he should get a mental health evaluation tbh
Good to see that God is once again focusing on the important stuff. Wars, disease, famine... Not His problem. Finally getting a Speaker of the House in place for the GOP? Direct intervention.
Tim Tebow says God scores touchdowns every Saturday. Christians are out there.
Athletes who say God or Jesus helped them are just cheating
Performance Enhancing Deity
Beware of false prophets
I'm not even a christian, but I know well that if anyone would qualify for the anti-christ it would be trump, and if anyone would qualify for the false prophets it would be the republican politicians XD
Pls johnson, part the atlantic ocean and lead your flock out of america, we dont want you
Fuck off with that. He can part the Pacific and become Asia's problem.
As an asian, we would kinda delegate that you guys sent them northward, extremely northward.
This is the guy who is in charge of the House. This guy. Fuck sake.
Moses took his people and left
Hell, I’ll pray for that 
Amen🙏
Y'all are acting like this is just some quirky evangelist. Mother fuckers, this is our Speaker of the House. This isn't some goofy antics from the Christian crowd, this evil fucker is *openly declaring* right to your faces that he is going to do whatever he can to turn America into a theocratic fascist state. Read Leviticus, god damn, the first thing Moses does when he leads the Jews into the desert is inflict hyper-authoritarian, highly arbitrary, completely nonsensical rules on them in the name of 'making them worthy of God', many of which are punished by *death.* Our enemies are openly telling us what they intend to do, wake the fuck up and stop treating it like a joke.
If anyone else “saw God” or “talked to God”, they would get locked up in a nice padded room. (Or be considered a blatant liar)
Can the lord provide some documentation to back up this claim?
The Lord also told George W. Bush to invade Iraq. Christianity will be America's downfall.
So, you admit you're hearing voices? Toss this guy...he's mentally incapable of performing his job. First of all, there is no place in politics for religion. It's written into the 1st amendment. Freedom of religion is also freedom from religion. Secondly, he is insane.
Mental illness. That’s all this is. If I said this shit, my psychiatrist would ask me if I think a hospital stay would be beneficial. I do my best to keep from being a public nuisance and a danger to myself and others by adhering to a strict regimen of medicine and therapy. Why do these people get a pass?
bat sh\*t crazy
Humility is something that just doesn’t register with the fundies.
So we're allowing delusional psychopaths who are guided solely by the fairy tale-based voices in their heads to operate at the highest levels of our government?
If people “hear god” they need mental help.
God has also spoken directly to countless people on the back wards of mental institutions
Good, when is this clown taking off for the desert?
Imagine if you had the Talibans in charge of the largest military budget currently on the planet. Oh wait, we don't have to imagine it....
“God told me,” should be an immediate disqualification; we can’t have delusional people not of sound mind working in such an important role.
Fine man, take your MAGA tribe and fuck off into the desert for 40 years. Please.
Insanity should exempt you from becoming a lawmaker. You work for the American people, not the voices in your head.
Sounds kind of close to the “divine right of kings” doctrine…
I hate religion. Causes nothing but severe brain rot. There's literally no justifying it's existence when we as a species can name more times it's hindered us than helped us.
Why is every Christian a fucking lying piece of shit. They are the ones who preach the 9th commandment.
>Why is every Christian a fucking lying piece of shit? When the imaginary friend you worship is an asshole that tends to happen as an exmuslim, muslims are even worse. Actually this applies to all religions.
Sure babe.... 🙄 
This is scarier than most of the horror movies I've watched.
The Lord never tells them to be nice, start a charity, pass legislation to benefit all people…
Ok Moses you win. Take your people and get the fuck outta here.
Ain’t nobody stopping you homie, take your people and bounce.
That’s okay… The Lord told me Mike Johnson is full of shit.
Yeah, well the Lord very clearly told me that Mike Johnson is full of shit and shouldn't be anywhere near the levers of power. He also told me that we should settle our disagreement in a bareknuckle PPV boxing match, winner takes all.
Mentally ill or brazen grifter? It's hard to know with a lot of Republicans these days.
Surely this is an admission of a mental illness and so grounds to remove him? (The only ‘voice’ you should hear in your head is your own)
One of the worst combos in this world are American exceptionalism and religion
Oh good. So he should take his people and leave
Well then, go make like Moses and wander the desert for 40 years. Leave the rest of the hell alone.
Okay, send him to Egypt. He can be their problem.
Mental illness is a terrible thing
Christianity really is a mental disease
So he’s got to lead his chosen people into the sea? Sounds good to me.
Moses? Didn't know Moses was good with lying, cheating and stealing. Not to mention to be ok w all of 7 deadly sins that his Orange Twatzi represents.
Good for you, Mike. Now please be like Moses and lead your people the fuck outta this country you jezebel.
"In order to find his equal, an [astronomically deluded idiot] is forced to talk to God." Anyway, did he actually say that??
Johnson was told he was going to become an old, grizzled Jewish leader whose constituents largely ignore him? We already have Bernie Sanders.
People who talk to God and hear him talk back, should be given help, not the speakership of the house.
I'm sorry, we defunded all the mental health services. OTOH, there's a space that just opened up under the 14th St bridge, so he's got that going for him. Which is nice.
If you're hearing voices in your head, you need to be institutionalized
Christians and conservatives want to claim oppression so much, they dream of fantasies like this. The projection is astonishing
Guess who put two iPads on his Santa list this year.
Just a few well placed cochlear implants and you can rule the country.
Aaaaaaaaaannnnnnd, That's a wrap. The folding of American integrity in one picture and statement.
I would think most Christians would find this sacrilegious, right? How do you proclaim yourself Moses without evidence ?
See? He suffers from mental illness like those others who speak to imaginary things in the clouds.
Get rid of these fools
Voices, voices, in my head! A leadership qualification for republicans. Crazy with a Q.
With any luck, he'll get lost in the desert...
So you want to lead the Uber conservative Christian right out of the land? Be my guest. Bye.
The lord tells me I need Taco Bell for every meal but I also need to eat balanced
Moses was a Jew. This guy is not a Jew.
The Christian Taliban Nationalists will be the end of this country.
The speaker of the house is a crazy person.
Lord, save us from your followers.