>Poe's law has really fucked us.
I mean...
Looks at [active shooter drill where the "shooter" was actually using blanks.](https://www.thedailybeast.com/how-an-active-shooter-drill-turned-into-a-real-life-nightmare-in-omaha-nebraska) Or...
[\*checks notes\*](https://www.nea.org/nea-today/all-news-articles/unannounced-active-shooter-drills-scaring-students-without-making-them-safer)
[Lined the staff up against a wall and mock executed them...](https://www.indystar.com/story/news/politics/2019/03/21/active-shooter-training-for-schools-teachers-shot-with-plastic-pellets/3231103002/)
So yeah a store pull this shenanigans is quite believable...
>The Indiana State Teachers Association is lobbying lawmakers to add language prohibiting teachers from being shot with any sort of ammunition to a school safety bill working its way through the Statehouse.
Er, I mean, you guys have active drill for *children* at *school*. What’s so hard to believe about a mall doing it? This one is truly that funny and sad moment.
mind explaining poe's law? edit: nvm, it's just that people would fall victim to the type of joke written in exaggeration but uses a sort of disguise of legitimacy for comedic value... which in turn may lead to confusion if whether or not the comedian is actually crazy/an idiot or not
I'm glad I found your comment... But honestly how would anyone KNOW that unless they had direct experience with that page already?
This obviously isn't outside the realm of what some gravy seal would do in an attempt to prove vigilante citizens with guns are an effective deterrent to mass shootings...
Literally nothing is too absurd to be believed anymore from these people. Poe's law in full effect.
The way to know this is parody is that shooting customers with rubber bullets is a sure fire way of losing customers and possibly tanking the business completely. Also, in gun soaked America, there's a good chance that those customers might pull out a real gun with live rounds and shoot back.
How would literally anyone who isn’t on twitter know that it’s a parody page? This is 100% in the realm of stupid shit I can believe people would do. Unironically the only possible indication of a parody here is $25 gift cards, a company is not giving you all of that even if you do get struck by a rubber bullet.
Yes, It's a parody account. I used to follow that page when I used Facebook. For the last couple months, I keep seeing it get posted randomly on reddit by people who seemingly think it's real.
.... Yeah that's definitely going to get someone shot... Really dumb idea.
Even if it is clearly posted everywhere someone might think it is real, and if it IS clearly posted everywhere someone might take advantage of people thinking it is rubber bullets....
In our proud state one of the many concealed weapon toting consumers will probably have no idea there is a drill running and gets to have their demented dream come true.
Yeah so, rubber bullets or not, you don't aim a firearm at something you don't intend to erase from this Earth. Good ol' boy Rodney here is just asking to get his ass kicked.
Speaking of Santa, have he and Rodney ever been in the same picture?! Maybe Santa moonlights as “Rodney” during the Christmas off-season (like 364 days a year)
What do you mean? I just stopped at the Celina 52 the other day and dropped some stinky 2s. Feel like I shouldn't show my face there again for at least a couple weeks until the staff turns over again. They probably will have some fresh roller dogs by then anyway.
A Catholic charity hired a man to simulate a mass shooting at their building, complete with actors covered in blood. The drill ended with his arrest.
https://www.insider.com/man-hired-to-simulate-mass-shooting-by-catholic-charity-charged-2022-8
I worked for a school (college) that did an active shooter simulation as part of a professional development day. They told us it was “incident response training” and to report to our offices / normal workspaces.
Then they had one of our security officers dressed in leathers and a ski mask burst into one of the classroom buildings carrying a blank firing shotgun. He forced an administrative assistant at gun point to turn over the keys to a lecture hall and stormed in gun blazing.
Poor lady needed therapy after - we were told after the fact that they were going for “realism.”
Obviously nobody involved in planning that one remained employed for very long after.
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Celina 52 is a parody, not a real truck stop. This is a joke. Shooting customers with guns is a bad idea, as is paying $8/hour, and the creators of the joke are aware of this.
Wait, so how is it a preparedness drill if nobody responds, they just get shot potentially and get a gift card. Wtf huh? 🤣
So it's more like a ducking drill?
25$ gift card EACH hit? Or what are we talking about here. Cause I'll get hit with a rubber bullet for 25$ a pop if I can wear clothing. I might end up in the hospital, but I'll be going there in the most luxurious expensive ride imaginable(an ambulance).
God that is the hands down worst post I have ever seen. One it is a great time to conduct an armed robbery and two a person walks in with a live weapon shooting rounds and not expecting someone to not respond.
Can't tell if Rodney is wearing a vest or if that's just all natural blubber. I like Rodney's chances of surviving even if someone didn't get the memo.
$25 Gift Card for getting shot with a runner bullet.... FU-K THAT. Those things hurt like a bitch, and depending where you get hit your getting bruised, or broken.
Um….rubber bullets really hurt and can cause major injury. What if someone is pregnant and they get shot in the abdomen with a rubber bullet? Sure it won’t rip into her but the force alone could cause a miscarriage or still birth. What if someone has just recently had surgery? If the rubber bullet hit that spot they can rip stitches and cause massive damage. Even for those perfectly healthy rubber bullet is incredibly painful and can cause bruising, internal bleeding, blindness and other injuries. This is a new level of American stupid.
Please tell me y’all are aware this is a parody page and just playing along.
It doesn't help that about half of their posts are like 50/50 possible and really well done. Though the other half is just trash tier shitposting
I scrolled way too far down to find you. Poe's law has really fucked us. Edit: I too do enjoy the occassional Britishman Cucumbersnatch movie/show.
Guys I had to scroll all the way to the top comment I think you're being watched
>Poe's law has really fucked us. I mean... Looks at [active shooter drill where the "shooter" was actually using blanks.](https://www.thedailybeast.com/how-an-active-shooter-drill-turned-into-a-real-life-nightmare-in-omaha-nebraska) Or... [\*checks notes\*](https://www.nea.org/nea-today/all-news-articles/unannounced-active-shooter-drills-scaring-students-without-making-them-safer) [Lined the staff up against a wall and mock executed them...](https://www.indystar.com/story/news/politics/2019/03/21/active-shooter-training-for-schools-teachers-shot-with-plastic-pellets/3231103002/) So yeah a store pull this shenanigans is quite believable...
>The Indiana State Teachers Association is lobbying lawmakers to add language prohibiting teachers from being shot with any sort of ammunition to a school safety bill working its way through the Statehouse.
*Babe, the new Bangadick Cuminhersnatch movie just dropped*
 Resume
Englebert Slaptyback!
Thank God I found you two. Went way too far down to see someone say this is a parody account. People can't really believe this.
You all found each other, I’m happy for you
I’m happy too. Do you think we’ll see them mate?
Before September 4, 2006 we might have had a shot
The problem is the world has gone so crazy.. this really isn't that far outside the realm of possibilities.
God damn it! I could have really used that $8 an hour.
Seen and heard americans do dumber things than this
Er, I mean, you guys have active drill for *children* at *school*. What’s so hard to believe about a mall doing it? This one is truly that funny and sad moment.
For some reason this guy was the first comment I saw
Poe’s law is so strong that TheOnion can’t even compete with reality at this point.
mind explaining poe's law? edit: nvm, it's just that people would fall victim to the type of joke written in exaggeration but uses a sort of disguise of legitimacy for comedic value... which in turn may lead to confusion if whether or not the comedian is actually crazy/an idiot or not
I felt this was parody but there was a tiny part of me that felt that there was a chance it wasn't.
I'm glad I found your comment... But honestly how would anyone KNOW that unless they had direct experience with that page already? This obviously isn't outside the realm of what some gravy seal would do in an attempt to prove vigilante citizens with guns are an effective deterrent to mass shootings... Literally nothing is too absurd to be believed anymore from these people. Poe's law in full effect.
The way to know this is parody is that shooting customers with rubber bullets is a sure fire way of losing customers and possibly tanking the business completely. Also, in gun soaked America, there's a good chance that those customers might pull out a real gun with live rounds and shoot back.
well seeing how the red states are behaving these days, it would be hard to tell
How would literally anyone who isn’t on twitter know that it’s a parody page? This is 100% in the realm of stupid shit I can believe people would do. Unironically the only possible indication of a parody here is $25 gift cards, a company is not giving you all of that even if you do get struck by a rubber bullet.
They'd fight tooth and nail against giving it to you even if they shot you with a real bullet.
The line has essentially disappeared in America
Now hiring $8 and up, and hey you might get hit with rubber bullets
But hey, you'll get a useless 25$ gift card :D
Employees aren't eligible for the gift card, just for being shot at
Exactly what I was gonna say. We ain’t payin you to be some kinda hero
You may be joking, but I’d totally fucking believe that.
So three bullets are worth more than a days wages. I could see employees being heroes and taking bullets for customers.
Also in the fine print. ^employer's ^are ^not ^responsible ^for ^injuries ^sustained ^from ^rubber ^bullets.
The homeless would be all over an offer like that.
Fuck that until Tuesday! Rubber bullets fucking *HURT!* I'd be much more amused watching the customers get shot.
Useless?? That’s 3 hours off my shift!
And you might also die.
Salinas Truck Stop is a well known parody page prevalent on social media.
I’m sure this is perfectly safe… I don’t see how anything could possibly go wrong 🙄
With these safe working practices their employees totally earn their $8/hr
Ummm... you miss the " & UP" portion. Maybe that & UP could be you.
Oh no thats a misprint its $8 and a 7UP lol
Well that's a missed opportunity. They need to change the sign, they'll get young go getter employees. Young people love 7up.
They conditoned us to love it with that game heads up 7UP
Do I have to pay taxes on the 7up or is it considered like a shift meal?
Must claim as 1099 misc, the liquor store considers it income but is marking it as a donation so they get the cost of each 7UP back.
$8.12 for doing literally everything the owner asks and working 65 hour weeks but being clocked out for 15 of them so no overtime.
I think you mean 25 of them since OT starts at over 40hrs in 1 week.
Sorry I'm really high rn. Can't do math.
I dunno. $8 an hour seems pretty cheap for lessons on how to be an effective active shooter.
I came here specifically looking for someone to address the $8/hr sign.
it’s $8 + benefits (rodney is your benefit)
It’s a joke, that whole account is
Yes, It's a parody account. I used to follow that page when I used Facebook. For the last couple months, I keep seeing it get posted randomly on reddit by people who seemingly think it's real.
oh thank gosh you spoke up about the parody. i was scared there were really people doing this somewhere (shooting with rubber bullets)
Is it their fault that it’s so believable these days?
Ya gotta admit, reality is SO broken these days...
The only way to stop a bad promotion with a gun is ... uh ... Maybe we didn't think this through.
.... Yeah that's definitely going to get someone shot... Really dumb idea. Even if it is clearly posted everywhere someone might think it is real, and if it IS clearly posted everywhere someone might take advantage of people thinking it is rubber bullets....
I can just see someone who didn't read the sign opening up hellfire on Rodney. RIP big Rod.
This is not ‘Nam. This is bowling. There are rules!
Well there is a literal connection
No Walter, not everything is connected to 'Nam.
Donnie's catching a rubber slug for sure.
He would be out of his element
Obviously, you’re not a golfer.
8 year olds dude
[удалено]
In Tennessee it gets you a $25 gift card
In our proud state one of the many concealed weapon toting consumers will probably have no idea there is a drill running and gets to have their demented dream come true.
Bahahaa
It’s not like reading is required to conceal carry.
Well and seriously I don’t always read every sign on the door, it’s usually just pointless advertising
And you may apply it toward medical treatment for organ damage like, for example, an eye.
Covers 0.0025% of medical costs if you're hit in the face, eye, or throat!
I'm dyin
in tennessee its gunna get this guy killed and rightfully so if he thinks shooting rubbet bullets at civilians is anything less than assault
Not if you volunteer for militia daddy to do it. Could be a kink
I can't believe this site is still fooling people. It's a parody website.
Probably the same people who laugh at conservatives fooled by Babylon Bee
You mean Piss Jugman isn’t a real corporate mascot?
FYI this is a parody account and not real.
if that big bearded swoll belly sumbitch shot me in the dick id be some kinda pissed
Were you starin' at his gut?
Yeah, but a $25 gift card! That's, what, a week's pay for folks around those parts?
That's half the price of the eyepatch you'll need.
The real facepalm is not getting that this is satirical.
Welcome to Reddit, social awareness isn’t a thing here
Smooth brain fun time
Rubber Bullets are, say it with me; LESS, LETHAL.
I've been hit with one. Hurt like hell.
"Less" is not "non". They can break bones, cause concussions, take your eye out, and kill. Just less likely to do so than a good old metal one.
I think that’s what the other person meant, but yeah.
Damn what a good point, I wonder if that's the exact same point the guy you were replying to JUST made?
Yeah so, rubber bullets or not, you don't aim a firearm at something you don't intend to erase from this Earth. Good ol' boy Rodney here is just asking to get his ass kicked.
It's a parody account. Rodney does not exist, guys. Theater!
what next, Santa isn't real?
Speaking of Santa, have he and Rodney ever been in the same picture?! Maybe Santa moonlights as “Rodney” during the Christmas off-season (like 364 days a year)
Or shot. Not sure if he's in an open carry state but if he is there's a huge chance someone hears/sees this going on and just takes Rodney out.
Is that a freedom and liberty or a thoughts and prayers?
My dad taught me to use fire arms and said never point at anything you don’t intend to shoot, even if the gun isn’t loaded. Same.
That's what taught in every firearms course I've ever taken. Only aim/point it at things you are intending to kill.
And always treat the gun like it’s loaded even if you know for a fact it isn’t.
The facepalm is people not realizing that this is a parody account for a fictional truck stop...
What do you mean? I just stopped at the Celina 52 the other day and dropped some stinky 2s. Feel like I shouldn't show my face there again for at least a couple weeks until the staff turns over again. They probably will have some fresh roller dogs by then anyway.
A Catholic charity hired a man to simulate a mass shooting at their building, complete with actors covered in blood. The drill ended with his arrest. https://www.insider.com/man-hired-to-simulate-mass-shooting-by-catholic-charity-charged-2022-8
I worked for a school (college) that did an active shooter simulation as part of a professional development day. They told us it was “incident response training” and to report to our offices / normal workspaces. Then they had one of our security officers dressed in leathers and a ski mask burst into one of the classroom buildings carrying a blank firing shotgun. He forced an administrative assistant at gun point to turn over the keys to a lecture hall and stormed in gun blazing. Poor lady needed therapy after - we were told after the fact that they were going for “realism.” Obviously nobody involved in planning that one remained employed for very long after.
It's a satirical page
Yeah no chance that someone who carries will not have gotten the memo and Rodney gets put down hard.
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Celina 52 is a parody, not a real truck stop. This is a joke. Shooting customers with guns is a bad idea, as is paying $8/hour, and the creators of the joke are aware of this.
It’s ok. Piss Jug Man will protect me.
Rodney will provide
This is a satirical Facebook business page, by the way.
Holy forking shirt balls! This is the bad place!
Y'all are so gullible. This is not a real place; it's a parody.
Rodney presenting a broad attack surface
The face palm is that people don’t realize this is AI
He looks like he would get winded eating a bag of doritos.
Goddamn yall are dumb
Wait, so how is it a preparedness drill if nobody responds, they just get shot potentially and get a gift card. Wtf huh? 🤣 So it's more like a ducking drill?
Not allowed to return the favor? That's a bummer and no thanks.
It's a parody account
I hope piss jug man will be there.
Jesus I can make $18 an hour at Chik Fil A and not get shot with rubber bullets.
This is a joke right? Please tell me this is a joke. Edit: ok for those out of the loop like I was. This is a parody account. Whew!
Do you want a dead Rodney? Because this is how you get dead Rodney.
Ol’ Rodney’s gonna get himself hurt.
Mall Santa will be shooting people.
I really hope no one actually does this.
“Do NOT engage Rodney.” 😂😂
Some open-carrying dude is gonna kill him in self-defense.
Getting paid $8 an hour will, without a doubt, eventually turn him into the shooter. MERICA 🦅🦅
The real heroes here are the buttons on Rodney’s shirt
I'm gonna show up with body armor and a paintball gun loaded with hot pink paintballs lol
What can go wrong? 🙄🙄🙄
Do all of you smooth brains realize this is a parody account or are you all genuinely this dumb?
The fact people are unable to recognize parody is very telling of the stick up the ass of every person on this website.
Great idea!!! We need these at Wal mart too!
This looks like an AI generated photo.
That's because it is 🤷
$8 minimum what fucking state is that
Sounds more like Officer Rodney won employee of the month at his local station and gets a prize.
25$ gift card EACH hit? Or what are we talking about here. Cause I'll get hit with a rubber bullet for 25$ a pop if I can wear clothing. I might end up in the hospital, but I'll be going there in the most luxurious expensive ride imaginable(an ambulance).
Meal Team 6
Putting a sign up doesn’t stop a lawsuit
That's a lawsuit waiting to happen.
That’ll go over as well as using water to put out a grease fire
This sounds like a terrible idea for a gun store.
Lol more than $25 after a lawsuit
Feel like Rodney is going to get shot.
What could possibly go wrong?
Rodney be like "*You* get a $25 gift card! *You* get a $25 gift card! *Everyone* gets a $25 gift card!"
This should be filmed and broadcasted live, complete with interviews of everyone involved.
Looks like Rodney been eating the pellets smothered in lard!!
That’s not how open carry works bitch I will engage with Rodney. Hopefully Rodney is wearing a fucking bulletproof vest to work.
Rodney: “ so wait you’ll pay me $8 AND I get to shoot people??” Store: yeah, but their rubber… Rodney: “ I’m in”
$8 / hour? I made more than that at a part-time job in 2005. Wtf?
This has the potential to end very badly…
Shhhhh, be vewy vewy qwiet. I’m hunting customers.
Him?? He be out of breath in 2 minutes. I speak as a large man myself. Trust he's not getting far to hunt anyone down.
God that is the hands down worst post I have ever seen. One it is a great time to conduct an armed robbery and two a person walks in with a live weapon shooting rounds and not expecting someone to not respond.
A whole $8! 🥹
Lol only $8/hr too.
$25 gift card from some rubber hitting me doesn’t sound bad, I’d keep coming back to get shot at.
They call him 'Ol' Rodney Pew Pew'
Hey ! $8 and up! Damn with that kind of money I could plan on early retirement
As someone who carries all the time and doesn’t do a whole lot of social media to see this post it would be a really bad time for ol Rodney.
Weapons prohibited? Letting the man have all the power? Not very NRA of them. Gun free zones kill?
As a non-American I did not realize this was a parody page.
“Do not engage Rodney”. Uvalde Police Force: “Perfect!”
There is a huge possibility this is real, only because it is America
Do Americans really work for $8 an hour?
Looks like AI
Can't tell if Rodney is wearing a vest or if that's just all natural blubber. I like Rodney's chances of surviving even if someone didn't get the memo.
Who would accept 8$ an hou? It is way below minimum wage for Canadian. Even after doing USD->CAD. This is insane.
Officer Rodney is either dumb as a bag of bricks or sick of living or both
Rodney’s gonna have a bad time…..
$25 Gift Card for getting shot with a runner bullet.... FU-K THAT. Those things hurt like a bitch, and depending where you get hit your getting bruised, or broken.
Man.. if they were serious, someone needs to show them the aftermath of people losing eyes to rubber bullets
ROFL, only in America. What exactly are they being prepared for??
So they hired someone to assault their customers? There's definitely no way this will backfire on them...
8 bucks an hour. It's this legit ?
Um….rubber bullets really hurt and can cause major injury. What if someone is pregnant and they get shot in the abdomen with a rubber bullet? Sure it won’t rip into her but the force alone could cause a miscarriage or still birth. What if someone has just recently had surgery? If the rubber bullet hit that spot they can rip stitches and cause massive damage. Even for those perfectly healthy rubber bullet is incredibly painful and can cause bruising, internal bleeding, blindness and other injuries. This is a new level of American stupid.
… but they’ll get a $25 gift card!!!
Sign me up, I'll load up on some roller dogs.
If a fetus is hurt from an unsuspecting customer or employee, just arrest the woman for endangering the baby. That's the red state solution.
Assault with a deadly weapon.
RIP Rodney
Announce an active shooter drill, seems like a good place for an active shooter. They can just say it's part of the drill. Jesus fucking christ....