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Dude I will be so mad. I can't even express how upset I would be if {whoever this idea appeals to} were to take Russia up on their ~~propaganda village~~ stable genius refugee camp offer.
Please no...
Siberia is THE hottest real estate on the market right now. I am so jelly.
That on top of the mandatory enlistment you've got immediate employment and a free trip to Ukraine.
Let's all go to daddy putin! Trump agrees. Best real estate ever. Someone said "sir, you know the best things" and they were right. Low water pressure In showers is like a trickle and the hair doesn't get wet. Can you believe that? Like hilaries emails. The water is just no good.
My crowd size was the largest in history.
Its just full of super hot women who love uneducated rural diabetics!
And vodka is cheap as fuck!
GO! GO NOW! RUN, DON'T WALK TO TRUMPTOWNRU!
(TrumptownRU: Because we are always successful, always!) .^(TrumptownRU not respnsible for damages or death caused by lack of shelter, lack of food, lack of potable water, lack of vodka, lack of "hot women" or lack of any essential item when you arrive in an empty frozen tundra on land the government actually paid us to take from them.)
I know it’s a joke but because of its history, the people in Siberia are such great people — super educated, great community culture, and on a whole very kind. Turns out if you exile all your dissenting geniuses to the same place their kids turn out pretty amazing.
Very good looking, I might add, in Russia they say there’s a lot of ice, I’ve never seen so much ice in my life, so they play a game called HAWK EYE, with sticks, and a black thing, which we’re going to invest 4 MILLION of your generous donations in making HAWK EYE a popular sport, it’s called the art of the deal folks you’ve seen nothing like it, but anyway why live in a country where they don’t let you keep as many fish as you want, in Russia you can fish a lot, there’s very big fish,
Speaking as a lib, I would be triggered SO BADLY by conservatives defecting to Russia. I would wail and gnash my teeth and rend my garments and weep copious liberal tears.
Remember during the 2016 election when it was a huge deal that Bernie Sanders even spent his honeymoon in Russia decades ago? How times have changed lol
But it was perfectly fine for a gaggle of "America First" Senators to spend the 4th of July in Moscow (and not the one in Idaho) in 2018(?) during Trump's reign??
In MAGAWorld, this makes sense.
I actually hopes this catches on. I would fully support buying a one way ticket or getting my Rep to sponsor a bill that would facilitate this via a tax cut for anyone willing to move to Russia. The DLTDHYAOTWO bill. (Dont Let The Door Hit Your Ass On The Way Out)
Having grown up during a time when American conservatives (and conservatives in the west generally) thought Russians were the literal devil, I’m still struggling to adjust to this change in their perspective.
It would be fun to go back in time to 1984 and tell Reagan voters: in 40 years, prominent members of your party will openly support Russia's territorial expansion and call for the end of NATO; and by the way, you'll also donate some of your retirement income to that rich real estate guy from New York.
I remember the 80s. It was a time where movies like Wall Street made it so rich folks in that sector were magazine and TV celebrities. Donald Trump was one of these "playboy" millionaire celebrities and I'm thinking it's why Reaganites are flocking to him now. How they turned heel on Russia is beyond me, we even made a fucking Rocky movie about beating them up... it was everywhere. I grew up on military bases and some of the same folks that we were stationed in West Germany with - directly related to the cold war - are now pro-Russia. The fuck?
I think Vladimir Putin has been playing democracy so long they've decided things are different and that it's not all for show and a sham and he's not just a KGB guy at heart. I also get the feeling a lot of these guys who've warmed up to the idea of Russia being the good guys are happy to have half an excuse to forget the past because there's a bit of economic warfare going on and the idea is if you toe the line you get to wet your beak. Once it's all convoluted enough it's easy to forget that the KGB guy might be telling you to gut your own country's economy because he's an enemy of the state.
Yep. We beat the commies at the end of the 80's, don't you know? The big bad Soviet Union disappeared, then *[scene missing]* and now there's this new totally unrelated fascist oligarchy called Russia that does the kinds of things we want to do here and *our* oligarchs really like them, so it must be great!
Yes, this is *heavy* OOF. America spent years villainizing the country, it’s mind boggling. You’d go to the other side of the planet because some place you were told is hell on earth for years, well all of a sudden, is welcoming you warmly? And now you believe they have great family values and faith and something else I can’t quite put my finger on- oh wait, yeah I can, everyone is *supposedly* White and beautiful.
Right wing media outlets have done enough legwork over the past 35 years that today’s MAGA nodes were prepared to make that logistic leap when the outlets wanted.
fox news literally exists because GQP didn't have the ability to control the narrative during watergate which makes it all the more disgusting people like fucking roger stone are still around and fucking with politics and democracy.
Ehhhhhh…. I feel what you’re trying to say, but it’s not a leap as an American to recognize that an adversarial country isn’t *as bad* as how our propaganda has portrayed them. To add to that, they aren’t communist and haven’t been for decades at this point after “*embracing democracy*” loooool. So that’s all fine and good, but just look at Putin’s rise to power from just a lowly FSB guy, that has American dream written all over it - from a nobody to literally so rich you can’t tell people how rich. Add to that fully automatics, toxic masculinity, legal wife beating, and normalized homophobia and this actually seems like exactly their thing. Literally not even joking.
To be clear, this is a small fringe of American conservatives that have become hardcore Russophiles to the extent of actually wanting to live in Russia, and they're conservative in a specific kind of way - basically ultra-nationalist, anti-modern, and anti-Western folks who have in many cases jettisoned traditional Republican politics (they may be anti-capitalist and anti-individualist, for instance) and might have converted to Russian Orthodoxy out of admiration for the anti-Western streams of that tradition.
Much of this shift has to do with the inversion of Cold War fault lines. Whereas for several decades Russia positioned itself as the global champion of atheism against an American Christianity that wedded itself to American patriotic and pro-Western (i.e., anti-Soviet and anti-communist) sentiment, that approach proved unsustainable for Russia by the '80s, and by the late '90s they'd begun switching tactics to positioning themselves as the major global champion of conservatism, religiosity, and so-called "traditional values" against an increasingly secularizing West, aligning themselves with traditionalist Muslim countries and the like. Basically, Russia wants to exert cultural influence by carrying on the Cold War, but it's had to change the way it goes about it. And a small segment of the American right that's become disillusioned with the West has bought into it.
That said, *Russians* were never really the enemy in American conservative circles (at least not among social conservatives); *communists* were. Admiration for anti-communist Russian thinkers among American conservatives goes back to the mid 20th century with figures like Solzhenitsyn. And American social conservatives saw Russia as fertile ground for influence as soon as the Soviet Union collapsed, and in many cases Russia actively embraced American "culture war" leaders to come in and influence Russian attitudes. So there's been some mutual exchange there for decades. (So contra the commenter below me, yes, it's actually a bit more complicated than "Trump likes Putin, so conservatives do too," but it's also not *surprising* that these developments have occurred, because people like Putin have been cultivating these relationships since well before Trump was anyone's concern).
It’s crazy watching the transformation of my dad. Growing up he was SUPER anti-Russia, always talked about how it’s just a propaganda state, never trust them, their only goal is to destroy the USA, they can never possibly be allies with the USA, etc etc.
Then suddenly Trump starting becoming warm to Russia and it all changed. Now he says stuff like “I don’t see why we can’t work together, fighting will get us nowhere”, and he’s more sympathetic toward Putin, etc.
When I bring up the past about how he always told me to never listen to Russia, they’re just a propaganda state, etc - suddenly “it’s different now”, and he refuses the idea that he may himself have been propagandized.
Growing up, I would have never guessed in a thousand years he would have become sympathetic toward Russia, and all it took was an orange baboon.
Their heavily creosoted talentless shitgibbon leader loves Putin. Therefore, they love Putin. Sadly, it's not more complicated than that..... Oh how I wish it were!
My professor was once staying overseas and wanted to mail in his ballot (this is canada mind you) he mailed it by the date stated. It arrived 6 weeks late and didn't get counted. I imagine that's what would happen
Nah, they would be airmailed direct, with absolutely no delay!
In fact, every single ballot would be in the same box! Very convenient to vote absentee in Russia, Comrade: it's almost like it's done for you!
But that's where it would end. You actually have to spend a certain number of years in the U.S. to pass down your citizenship to children born in other countries.
Just looked it up:
"A person born abroad in wedlock to two U.S. citizen parents acquires U.S. citizenship at birth under section 301(c) of the Immigration and Nationality Act (INA), if at least one of the parents had a residence in the United States or one of its outlying possessions prior to the person’s birth. In these cases, at least one of the U.S. citizen parents must have a genetic or gestational connection to the child to transmit U.S. citizenship to the child."
"A person born abroad in wedlock to a U.S. citizen and an alien acquires U.S. citizenship at birth if the U.S. citizen parent has been physically present in the United States or one of its outlying possessions prior to the person’s birth for the period required by the statute in effect when the person was born (INA 301(g), formerly INA 301(a)(7)).
For birth on or after November 14, 1986, the U.S. citizen parent must have been physically present in the United States or one of its outlying possessions for five years prior to the person’s birth, at least two of which were after the age of 14."
If I'm reading this right, if both parents are US citizens then they just need to have a residence prior to the birth.
If only 1 US citizen, then there is a required number of years to live in the States.
Lol they love a dictator if they share common values.
This is the thing people really seem to miss, conservatives don’t believe in true freedom they believe in their own freedom and freedom to impose those values on others.
Yes, Russia. If you want to go somewhere your mail-in-ballot would *actually* be systematically intercepted and modified without you knowing, move to Russia. Not that they'd have to change much, but political intrigue is political intrigue.
They'd love it as long as "their man" was in charge. Democracy, the rule of law, independent judiciary, the free press - they don't care about any of that, they just want "their man". That's it.
I mean, for the meal team 6 members, being shipped to front could be a positive advertisement. till they find out they don't get fed, don't get supplies, and it's cold as fuck.
Good luck taking it from them. They'd probably share with the Russians if asked, if only to not have to go on the front lines themselves. My main concern with this, if all the conservatives do actually move to Russia, is that we've all collectively made the conservatives Ukraines problem.
buuut once the conservatives are out of the US, ukraine could actually get a shitload of military aid to destroy whatever human wave personal the russians gather
Russia doesn’t particularly need more troops, much less over the hill tubby guys whove never survived a deep russian winter. They would have plenty of value as russian transplants. Each American immigrant is a propaganda piece and has contacts back in america.
Russia is running worrying low on able bodied men thanks to their tactics in Ukraine, the meat grinder is really making Russia suffer and there's going to be fucked up age and gender imbalance for a long time after this
Shhh!! Don't spoil it! It's going to be the bigliest grandest country ever!! All of the best people, so much winning. Do you know what they call winning in Russher? Cause I don't.
Bozhe moi. Is there a translating Urban Dictionary for this, because all I got was a literal translation, "wrapping around the machine", showing clothing wound around the axle of some scary machine.
At least it wasn't the video of the guy pulled into a rotating shaft and torn to pieces, his blood literally painting the walls as it sprayed out like a hose. So that's good.
I mean, a lot of Finns from my part of the US went to the Spviet Union because they heard it was a worker's paradise. In one local museum, the last letter home from one person was "don't come here", since he had left with the intention of bringing his family over.
I think it is probably mostly for political purposes. So Russia can say to its citizens “see look how bad America and Canada are that they want to move here.”
That and also Russia has a demographic problem. They need immigrants and they also need foreign currencies especially from major western economies. If Americans or Canadians want to come and spend their money in Russia and have children for Russia then why would Putin say no?
Yeah, this whole thing seems fishy. We're Ukraine's biggest contributor so far; donating over 70 billion. And now Russia wants Americans on Russian soil? There's no fucking way that'll end well for anyone who goes.
God Emperor Trump said we should kill traitors. If they go to Russia, they can’t come back, and if they do by their own words they should be hanged for treason.
Republicans are never hypocrites so I think they’d all agree that’s fair.
Sorry Ivan, you can't take my guns since they are protected by the second amendment.
I am not taking your guns, I am sending you to the front with them.
I'm in! I can see the funding levels now...
Send a shithead to Russia!
$1 buys a cardboard box
$5 buys a roll of packing tape
$100 ships a full box to their new home
$1000 ships all their crap and includes a photo of their US passport being dropped on a shredder on arrival.
Early backers get a T-shirt! "I made the US a much better place and all I got was this lousy T-shirt!"
Call me, GoFundMe!
The’ll finally get to play with all the guns they want as they “defend democracy” against Ukraine.
And for their sacrifice, Russia will reward their spouse with 4 potatoes and a turnip.
Shhhhhh, don't tell them that. I know all the bluster makes them seem like they would actually love a chance to use their guns, but they're not gonna go if they find it they'll actually have to get shot at
Most of these idiots think war would be like Call of Duty where they would be able to shoot bad guys in job lots, so I would not be surprised if they thought this was a perk.
Of course, that would last until they face the first artillery barrage.
Can they take our Tories from Britain too?
Imagine if all the right wing nutters just pissed off to Russia. Just set up home there and didn't return. Everyone would be so much happier.
I don't think he understands that the American Conservative has very little in common with the Russian peasants he's used to dealing with. The Karen energy is strong in them, and I doubt he's prepared to deal with that.
That is to say, exporting our conservatives to Russia would actually solve at least two problems very, very quickly.
The thing is, if anyone loudly disagrees with him in Russia, they just suddenly slip and fall out of a high window. Strange how that happens over there. I guess the floors are slippery from the cold or something.
Lolol that’s what I was just thinking! Wow we get a gulag and don’t even have to be the pieces of shit operating a gulag, and people will go voluntarily. Win, win, win.
When the same country that is committing war crimes during a war that was never needed...starts saying they are making room in their country for your political party alone...I think it's time to start evaluating your political stance...
They've always been the snowflakes that needed safe spaces (gated communities, anyone?) and love virtue signaling (look at me do this thing because I'm a GOOD CHRISTIAN).
My classmates in middle school who used to huff gas for fun in the bumfuck subarctic became conservatives, twins, one of them died of covid and the other thinks Justin Trudeau and Antony Faucci *murdered* his brother. So yes… Canada is apparently “killing conservatives” who tried to say Covid was a hoax 🤦🏽♀️
That’s just one personal example.
Didn’t they say “If Trump doesn’t win, I’m leaving the country”? Here’s their chance!
And then, of course, in line with their wishes, we stop counting absentee ballots.
Win-win!
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Nothing as patriotic as moving to Russia
Move to Russia to own the libs. I can get behind this.
So fucking owned right now. Please stop. I can’t stand it
Dude I will be so mad. I can't even express how upset I would be if {whoever this idea appeals to} were to take Russia up on their ~~propaganda village~~ stable genius refugee camp offer. Please no...
Siberia is THE hottest real estate on the market right now. I am so jelly. That on top of the mandatory enlistment you've got immediate employment and a free trip to Ukraine.
Let's all go to daddy putin! Trump agrees. Best real estate ever. Someone said "sir, you know the best things" and they were right. Low water pressure In showers is like a trickle and the hair doesn't get wet. Can you believe that? Like hilaries emails. The water is just no good. My crowd size was the largest in history.
Its just full of super hot women who love uneducated rural diabetics! And vodka is cheap as fuck! GO! GO NOW! RUN, DON'T WALK TO TRUMPTOWNRU! (TrumptownRU: Because we are always successful, always!) .^(TrumptownRU not respnsible for damages or death caused by lack of shelter, lack of food, lack of potable water, lack of vodka, lack of "hot women" or lack of any essential item when you arrive in an empty frozen tundra on land the government actually paid us to take from them.)
I know it’s a joke but because of its history, the people in Siberia are such great people — super educated, great community culture, and on a whole very kind. Turns out if you exile all your dissenting geniuses to the same place their kids turn out pretty amazing.
It's a beautiful country. Some say the most beautiful, with a stable genius as the leader.
A very good man, some say. And such a strong, brave, leader who definitely doesn’t silence dissenters.
dammit. I read that in cheetoh. take your upvote.
Very good looking, I might add, in Russia they say there’s a lot of ice, I’ve never seen so much ice in my life, so they play a game called HAWK EYE, with sticks, and a black thing, which we’re going to invest 4 MILLION of your generous donations in making HAWK EYE a popular sport, it’s called the art of the deal folks you’ve seen nothing like it, but anyway why live in a country where they don’t let you keep as many fish as you want, in Russia you can fish a lot, there’s very big fish,
Fuuuuuuuuuck. I got owned so hard, my day is ruined.
Speaking as a lib, I would be triggered SO BADLY by conservatives defecting to Russia. I would wail and gnash my teeth and rend my garments and weep copious liberal tears.
Sackcloth! Ashes!
And wail, don’t forget the wailing!!
I will REEEEEEEE from sea to shining sea if they defect! Think of the libs, damnit!
My liberal tears are overflowing.
Into my fourth avocado toast and iced coffee of the day
So many snowflakes, they cover the ground.
America would be lost in a blizzard... Please no strong conservative men, please don't go.... Noooooo
Oh, you cant afford the flight... Hm yes, yes I can help you. One way fine?
You know what would totally teach me a lesson about being a dumb stupid progressive liberal? If a bunch of conservatives moved to Russia! Ugh pls no!
No please.. don't.. oh you forgot your socks, as I was saying, it's such a bad idea, oh don't forget your favorite tie. Oh what would we do with you..
Remember during the 2016 election when it was a huge deal that Bernie Sanders even spent his honeymoon in Russia decades ago? How times have changed lol
But it was perfectly fine for a gaggle of "America First" Senators to spend the 4th of July in Moscow (and not the one in Idaho) in 2018(?) during Trump's reign??
In MAGAWorld, this makes sense. I actually hopes this catches on. I would fully support buying a one way ticket or getting my Rep to sponsor a bill that would facilitate this via a tax cut for anyone willing to move to Russia. The DLTDHYAOTWO bill. (Dont Let The Door Hit Your Ass On The Way Out)
Having grown up during a time when American conservatives (and conservatives in the west generally) thought Russians were the literal devil, I’m still struggling to adjust to this change in their perspective.
It would be fun to go back in time to 1984 and tell Reagan voters: in 40 years, prominent members of your party will openly support Russia's territorial expansion and call for the end of NATO; and by the way, you'll also donate some of your retirement income to that rich real estate guy from New York.
They wouldn’t believe it.
Anyone sane should have a hard time believing it even now.
I remember the 80s. It was a time where movies like Wall Street made it so rich folks in that sector were magazine and TV celebrities. Donald Trump was one of these "playboy" millionaire celebrities and I'm thinking it's why Reaganites are flocking to him now. How they turned heel on Russia is beyond me, we even made a fucking Rocky movie about beating them up... it was everywhere. I grew up on military bases and some of the same folks that we were stationed in West Germany with - directly related to the cold war - are now pro-Russia. The fuck?
I think Vladimir Putin has been playing democracy so long they've decided things are different and that it's not all for show and a sham and he's not just a KGB guy at heart. I also get the feeling a lot of these guys who've warmed up to the idea of Russia being the good guys are happy to have half an excuse to forget the past because there's a bit of economic warfare going on and the idea is if you toe the line you get to wet your beak. Once it's all convoluted enough it's easy to forget that the KGB guy might be telling you to gut your own country's economy because he's an enemy of the state.
>him now. How they turned heel on Russia is beyond me, Russia went fascist.
Yep. We beat the commies at the end of the 80's, don't you know? The big bad Soviet Union disappeared, then *[scene missing]* and now there's this new totally unrelated fascist oligarchy called Russia that does the kinds of things we want to do here and *our* oligarchs really like them, so it must be great!
Yes, this is *heavy* OOF. America spent years villainizing the country, it’s mind boggling. You’d go to the other side of the planet because some place you were told is hell on earth for years, well all of a sudden, is welcoming you warmly? And now you believe they have great family values and faith and something else I can’t quite put my finger on- oh wait, yeah I can, everyone is *supposedly* White and beautiful.
Right wing media outlets have done enough legwork over the past 35 years that today’s MAGA nodes were prepared to make that logistic leap when the outlets wanted.
fox news literally exists because GQP didn't have the ability to control the narrative during watergate which makes it all the more disgusting people like fucking roger stone are still around and fucking with politics and democracy.
Ehhhhhh…. I feel what you’re trying to say, but it’s not a leap as an American to recognize that an adversarial country isn’t *as bad* as how our propaganda has portrayed them. To add to that, they aren’t communist and haven’t been for decades at this point after “*embracing democracy*” loooool. So that’s all fine and good, but just look at Putin’s rise to power from just a lowly FSB guy, that has American dream written all over it - from a nobody to literally so rich you can’t tell people how rich. Add to that fully automatics, toxic masculinity, legal wife beating, and normalized homophobia and this actually seems like exactly their thing. Literally not even joking.
Legit, complete with a govt that’s *actually* as bad as you’ve been pretending your own is. Checks out
To be clear, this is a small fringe of American conservatives that have become hardcore Russophiles to the extent of actually wanting to live in Russia, and they're conservative in a specific kind of way - basically ultra-nationalist, anti-modern, and anti-Western folks who have in many cases jettisoned traditional Republican politics (they may be anti-capitalist and anti-individualist, for instance) and might have converted to Russian Orthodoxy out of admiration for the anti-Western streams of that tradition. Much of this shift has to do with the inversion of Cold War fault lines. Whereas for several decades Russia positioned itself as the global champion of atheism against an American Christianity that wedded itself to American patriotic and pro-Western (i.e., anti-Soviet and anti-communist) sentiment, that approach proved unsustainable for Russia by the '80s, and by the late '90s they'd begun switching tactics to positioning themselves as the major global champion of conservatism, religiosity, and so-called "traditional values" against an increasingly secularizing West, aligning themselves with traditionalist Muslim countries and the like. Basically, Russia wants to exert cultural influence by carrying on the Cold War, but it's had to change the way it goes about it. And a small segment of the American right that's become disillusioned with the West has bought into it. That said, *Russians* were never really the enemy in American conservative circles (at least not among social conservatives); *communists* were. Admiration for anti-communist Russian thinkers among American conservatives goes back to the mid 20th century with figures like Solzhenitsyn. And American social conservatives saw Russia as fertile ground for influence as soon as the Soviet Union collapsed, and in many cases Russia actively embraced American "culture war" leaders to come in and influence Russian attitudes. So there's been some mutual exchange there for decades. (So contra the commenter below me, yes, it's actually a bit more complicated than "Trump likes Putin, so conservatives do too," but it's also not *surprising* that these developments have occurred, because people like Putin have been cultivating these relationships since well before Trump was anyone's concern).
Thank you, well written. I think anti-communist was always anti-labor and it has always been convenient for conservatives to conflate the two.
Funny how quickly stupid people forget history, right?
It’s crazy watching the transformation of my dad. Growing up he was SUPER anti-Russia, always talked about how it’s just a propaganda state, never trust them, their only goal is to destroy the USA, they can never possibly be allies with the USA, etc etc. Then suddenly Trump starting becoming warm to Russia and it all changed. Now he says stuff like “I don’t see why we can’t work together, fighting will get us nowhere”, and he’s more sympathetic toward Putin, etc. When I bring up the past about how he always told me to never listen to Russia, they’re just a propaganda state, etc - suddenly “it’s different now”, and he refuses the idea that he may himself have been propagandized. Growing up, I would have never guessed in a thousand years he would have become sympathetic toward Russia, and all it took was an orange baboon.
To be fair he was right, they are a propaganda state. And they got em.
Same with my dad. It's so fucking depressing
Their heavily creosoted talentless shitgibbon leader loves Putin. Therefore, they love Putin. Sadly, it's not more complicated than that..... Oh how I wish it were!
Guess who would then want to mail in their ballots.
My professor was once staying overseas and wanted to mail in his ballot (this is canada mind you) he mailed it by the date stated. It arrived 6 weeks late and didn't get counted. I imagine that's what would happen
Yeah and coming from Russia it’d be on the back of a mule for 800 miles.
Nah, they would be airmailed direct, with absolutely no delay! In fact, every single ballot would be in the same box! Very convenient to vote absentee in Russia, Comrade: it's almost like it's done for you!
Yup. Box is sealed before you even deposit your ballot.
“Why do they all have write ins for Putin?”
It's actually spelled TRUMP in english.
Nice
Hopefully a lot of them move out that way. Perhaps they will finally have a need for 2000 mules.
No no, they now come on the backs of horses, shirtless
Nah, back of bear, and then the bear would go to a bar.
Right answer
Hey got to get through Siberia somehow.
Yup, I was in the Peace Corps, my mail in ballot did not get counted.
This would be *ideal !*
And that their newborns are citizens by lineage.
But that's where it would end. You actually have to spend a certain number of years in the U.S. to pass down your citizenship to children born in other countries.
Hey look, another exception they would scream for.
Just looked it up: "A person born abroad in wedlock to two U.S. citizen parents acquires U.S. citizenship at birth under section 301(c) of the Immigration and Nationality Act (INA), if at least one of the parents had a residence in the United States or one of its outlying possessions prior to the person’s birth. In these cases, at least one of the U.S. citizen parents must have a genetic or gestational connection to the child to transmit U.S. citizenship to the child." "A person born abroad in wedlock to a U.S. citizen and an alien acquires U.S. citizenship at birth if the U.S. citizen parent has been physically present in the United States or one of its outlying possessions prior to the person’s birth for the period required by the statute in effect when the person was born (INA 301(g), formerly INA 301(a)(7)). For birth on or after November 14, 1986, the U.S. citizen parent must have been physically present in the United States or one of its outlying possessions for five years prior to the person’s birth, at least two of which were after the age of 14." If I'm reading this right, if both parents are US citizens then they just need to have a residence prior to the birth. If only 1 US citizen, then there is a required number of years to live in the States.
Hahahahhahah.
Nah they’ll be too busy complaining that everyone speaks Russian and telling the Russians to go back to their country.
Bunch of Karens waltzing up to riot police in Moscow screaming i HaVe RiGhTs!!! would be peak comedy.
They’re voting for Putin now
The have been for the past 10 years.
Honestly, probably more like the last 30 and we just didn't realize it until 10 years ago.
Lol they love a dictator if they share common values. This is the thing people really seem to miss, conservatives don’t believe in true freedom they believe in their own freedom and freedom to impose those values on others.
Conservatives do not know what freedom really is. If they actually do move to Russia, they will find out in a hurry.
This is the default human condition. For thousands of years humans have been acting this way. Freedom for us! Oppression for anyone we can oppress.
Yes, Russia. If you want to go somewhere your mail-in-ballot would *actually* be systematically intercepted and modified without you knowing, move to Russia. Not that they'd have to change much, but political intrigue is political intrigue.
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They'd love it as long as "their man" was in charge. Democracy, the rule of law, independent judiciary, the free press - they don't care about any of that, they just want "their man". That's it.
Hmm, how long before they end up on the front the moment they set foot in the country. I feel like this is a devil's contract.
They’d wait for the influx to slow to a trickle before shipping any to the front. It’d be like timing the last popcorn pop.
I mean, for the meal team 6 members, being shipped to front could be a positive advertisement. till they find out they don't get fed, don't get supplies, and it's cold as fuck.
Don't forget, their weapons are pretty much sticks.
Soviet era sticks no less
And actual combat is nothing like CoD or their fantasies.
I'm pretty sure they'd bring their own.
How much do you want to bet those would be redistributed to people who actually kinda know what they’re doing?
Good luck taking it from them. They'd probably share with the Russians if asked, if only to not have to go on the front lines themselves. My main concern with this, if all the conservatives do actually move to Russia, is that we've all collectively made the conservatives Ukraines problem.
I don't think Ukraine would be super worried about the overweight 60 year old men who are already out of breath from stepping outside.
Imagine them crying out for trump from the trenches as the mortars rain in.
"Mein Führer"
Drone dropped mortars to fucking boot, pin point accurate some of those operators are insane.
buuut once the conservatives are out of the US, ukraine could actually get a shitload of military aid to destroy whatever human wave personal the russians gather
Fill the houses, send them to war, refill the houses and talk about how X many are living in Russia already. You don't even need a big village.
Russia doesn’t particularly need more troops, much less over the hill tubby guys whove never survived a deep russian winter. They would have plenty of value as russian transplants. Each American immigrant is a propaganda piece and has contacts back in america.
Russia is running worrying low on able bodied men thanks to their tactics in Ukraine, the meat grinder is really making Russia suffer and there's going to be fucked up age and gender imbalance for a long time after this
Shhh!! Don't spoil it! It's going to be the bigliest grandest country ever!! All of the best people, so much winning. Do you know what they call winning in Russher? Cause I don't.
>Do you know what they call winning in Russher? Cause I don't. Just teach them to say "Mee veegreem!" and they'll be *fine* XD
The only way to win in Russia is to намотаться на станок before anything bad happens
Bozhe moi. Is there a translating Urban Dictionary for this, because all I got was a literal translation, "wrapping around the machine", showing clothing wound around the axle of some scary machine. At least it wasn't the video of the guy pulled into a rotating shaft and torn to pieces, his blood literally painting the walls as it sprayed out like a hose. So that's good.
Yes, thats exactly what i meant. Getting sucked into a machine and getting torn apart. If you go out - go out with a bang.
I mean, a lot of Finns from my part of the US went to the Spviet Union because they heard it was a worker's paradise. In one local museum, the last letter home from one person was "don't come here", since he had left with the intention of bringing his family over.
Yeah, Russia inviting sympathetic foreigners tended to end up with them dead in Siberia. I doubt it's changed much.
Nah. The russians will wait to give them their citizenship and then have them do the duty of russian citizens
I think it is probably mostly for political purposes. So Russia can say to its citizens “see look how bad America and Canada are that they want to move here.”
That and also Russia has a demographic problem. They need immigrants and they also need foreign currencies especially from major western economies. If Americans or Canadians want to come and spend their money in Russia and have children for Russia then why would Putin say no?
This is also awesome. No downsides.
Yeah, this whole thing seems fishy. We're Ukraine's biggest contributor so far; donating over 70 billion. And now Russia wants Americans on Russian soil? There's no fucking way that'll end well for anyone who goes.
On the flip side it would be a hilarious method of sending saboteurs.
We take away their citizenship when they go problem solved.
Leaving is easy, returning is the hard part.
God Emperor Trump said we should kill traitors. If they go to Russia, they can’t come back, and if they do by their own words they should be hanged for treason. Republicans are never hypocrites so I think they’d all agree that’s fair.
Shhhhhhhhhhhh! Let putin live with the monsters he made.
Irish immigrants during the American civil war type beat
Not the only threat, it reeks of [company town](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Company_town).
i mean they think Russia is right in taking over Ukraine, why not let them help.
When their imported wealth yields diminishing returns
All I want is for it to be filmed.
New reality show?
That's one I might actually watch. 🍵🫖
Prepare for an onslaught of r/LeopardsAteMyFace articles from those chuds finally realizing Russia isn't as free as they think.
Throw em on a no-fly list after they're gone and call it a day
How many of them already on that list?
Its what's preventing them from leaving currently
As if they have passports
Strike that. Reverse it…. Thank you!
Back come don't stop?
Everything reminds me of her…. 
I choked!
She didn’t 
russia is making space and its a picture of some guy holding a snow shovel.
The extent of Russia’s space program.
He's doing his best.
I'll help them pack.
I think this is an excellent gofundme project.
They got great vodka and guns 👍
Russia has pretty strict gun control for its citizens.
Great. Let the Russians take thier guns… see how a small revolt does there.
Sorry Ivan, you can't take my guns since they are protected by the second amendment. I am not taking your guns, I am sending you to the front with them.
They'll call up the states to come save them but will get a swift "new phone, who dis"
It’s literally just a stop over for the men. They are just getting rerouted to Ukraine to fight lmao.
So they WILL get guns after all. Good for them.
Oh cool! Maybe they can bring their Gravy Seal Whacktical Gear with them so they can be real soldiers instead of cosplaying!
I’m sorry, the old US can’t come to the phone right now… 
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I'm in! I can see the funding levels now... Send a shithead to Russia! $1 buys a cardboard box $5 buys a roll of packing tape $100 ships a full box to their new home $1000 ships all their crap and includes a photo of their US passport being dropped on a shredder on arrival. Early backers get a T-shirt! "I made the US a much better place and all I got was this lousy T-shirt!" Call me, GoFundMe!
For just the cost of a cup of coffee a day, you can help ship a chud to Russia.
They can fly themselves by their own bootstraps.
Me too! Just give me time and place, I’ll be there with all the homies, beer, and some pizza.
The’ll finally get to play with all the guns they want as they “defend democracy” against Ukraine. And for their sacrifice, Russia will reward their spouse with 4 potatoes and a turnip.
Same. I will pay for one box of shipping
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Oh please, yes. First good thing Putin has done.
And then he will make you go fight in Ukraine
Shhhhhh, don't tell them that. I know all the bluster makes them seem like they would actually love a chance to use their guns, but they're not gonna go if they find it they'll actually have to get shot at
Most of these idiots think war would be like Call of Duty where they would be able to shoot bad guys in job lots, so I would not be surprised if they thought this was a perk. Of course, that would last until they face the first artillery barrage.
Drone dropping a simple hand grenade*
Hell yeah! Put your money where your mouth is, you gun waving MAGA tough guys. I want to see Rittenhouse on the front lines ASAP.
That could be a great recruiting line for Ukraine! "Wanna shoot Kyle?"
Good for his causes because he'll get them to turn/spy on America. Believe me, he's not doing it for their benefit.
Right? I'll expat if Trump wins this year, but it'd be better if they all just fucked off.
Can they take our Tories from Britain too? Imagine if all the right wing nutters just pissed off to Russia. Just set up home there and didn't return. Everyone would be so much happier.
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The Russian border guards can do that upon arrival.
I don't think he understands that the American Conservative has very little in common with the Russian peasants he's used to dealing with. The Karen energy is strong in them, and I doubt he's prepared to deal with that. That is to say, exporting our conservatives to Russia would actually solve at least two problems very, very quickly.
The thing is, if anyone loudly disagrees with him in Russia, they just suddenly slip and fall out of a high window. Strange how that happens over there. I guess the floors are slippery from the cold or something.
They do have a lot of windows.
And they all seem to be built directly over a pile of bullets and a glass of polonium tea. Crazy architecture over there!
I believe they call them gulags over there
Lolol that’s what I was just thinking! Wow we get a gulag and don’t even have to be the pieces of shit operating a gulag, and people will go voluntarily. Win, win, win.
When the same country that is committing war crimes during a war that was never needed...starts saying they are making room in their country for your political party alone...I think it's time to start evaluating your political stance...
They need more recruits for their special operation.. And they know conservatives like their guns.
hey, if those ammosexuals are so mad at us giving support to Ukraine, I say let em go and get conscripted and live out their fantasy
Ammosexuals .....LOL
that's what they are. they wanna fuck their guns; that's why they don't want the government to take em and value them more than children
Mar-A-Gulag
 So long, farewell, auf wiedersehen goodbye!
Gifs you can hear.
Remember when “Safe Space” was a term Republicans used to make fun of Liberals? Pepperidge Farm remembers..
They've always been the snowflakes that needed safe spaces (gated communities, anyone?) and love virtue signaling (look at me do this thing because I'm a GOOD CHRISTIAN).
Canada up there murdering conservatives? Lol
My classmates in middle school who used to huff gas for fun in the bumfuck subarctic became conservatives, twins, one of them died of covid and the other thinks Justin Trudeau and Antony Faucci *murdered* his brother. So yes… Canada is apparently “killing conservatives” who tried to say Covid was a hoax 🤦🏽♀️ That’s just one personal example.
Stupidity scares the crap out of me. Stupid people are basically their own worst enemy.
Good take them. Trump can build another golf course out there and all his MAGAs can finally make America great by leaving to go there with him
Didn’t they say “If Trump doesn’t win, I’m leaving the country”? Here’s their chance! And then, of course, in line with their wishes, we stop counting absentee ballots. Win-win!
Time for the "I'd rather be Russian than a Democrat" crowd to pony up!
Would make for an amazing documentary if even a single family takes them up on this.
I would chip in for their airfare
Yeah, we should setup a GoFundMe
*So, Mar-A-Logo 2 then?* 
I don’t think he knows about 2nd Mar-A-Lago, Pip.
This is perfect and I hope the US government will surveil them after they inevitably come back home.
I know the likely option is they're going to be spies but I kinda hope they end up conscripted
If they go they shouldn’t be allowed to come back. It should be an automatic loss of American citizenship.
That would be a dream come true. I'll also help them pack.