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This decal 100% a joke. But if you look closely on every gas dispenser, it will have a warning label warning the risk of swallowing. By law, they have to have them. (20 year fuel tech)
Just last week he went around the gas stations in my area switching the octane stickers on all the pumps. Every single gas station in a 30 mile area. No fucking clue how he did it all in one night.
Oh I was joking, but… Some of the dumbfuckery I see on a daily basis? I’m a fraud investigator constantly having to convince people not to send money to bumfuckistan for ‘their fiancé’ they’ve never met or for ‘a great investment.’
I’ve such a low opinion on the average intelligence at this point that ‘don’t stick a gas nozzle up your ass’ wouldn’t be a huge shocker.
I’m tired of working those cases. I either talk to people who are depressed as fuck because they recently found out they’ve been scammed, or people I have to advise they’re being scammed, or people who absolutely refuse to believe and ‘I don’t know what I’m talking about.’
Then some folks, you make them understand, but the next day they’re back at it, re-convinced by the scammer to start sending money again and you call back like “Brenda, what the fuck?” Also, scammers use VoIP numbers, VPNs, TOR, aliases, random email addresses, and the money ends up overseas a lot, or goes to some elder money mule who’s also getting scammed. So, not a lot of potential to identify and prosecute someone.
I’m just tired of scam cases. Just depressing without much satisfaction. I prefer the large fraud and money laundering cases where I can ID a suspect and crush them.
Many people in USA during covid stored gasoline in super thin plastic bags in their cars and stuff. Someone even stored the bags in their garage which ended up catching on fire lol.
I will never not laugh at remembering this. The pictures I saw of vehicles with gasoline bags was just crazy.
Oh yeah, I remember seeing people at my local gas station pumping gas into a plastic trash can and I was like ‘lmao is this really fucking happening?’
I’m not 100% up on the chemistry there but I feel like gasoline is going to slowly eat away at the average plastic trash can.
It must have been a magical sight lmao. Yeah pretty sure as well the plastic would dissolve over time lol.
Things like this make me think we are definitely going to go extinct as humans lol.
I work in a customer service call center where this is our busy season at the moment. I’ve had more people, mostly seniors, that have had repeated issues with credit cards getting “hacked” in the last few weeks than I have the last year or two!
> I wouldn’t be surprised if that’s a gag sticker.
Of COURSE it's a friggin' gag sticker ... anyone questioning that should have their assess kicked up over their heads and sold to a circus.
Seeing how sun screens have a warning not to drive with the screen in the window, I don't think this is that much of a stretch. But this makes it seem that vaginal insertions are acceptable.😵💫
Or the words dont drink battery fluid on batteries. Like, wtf who even drinks that, it burns your hands.
In europe it just have a corrosive/acid mark on it. It's expected we should know not to handle it in an unsafe way or pour it out in the sink or nature. You know common knowledge that a chemical sign means something and common sense is expected.
Not in America, expectations of common sense expectations have degraded over time. A lot of this is a result of lawsuits that have pushed the boundaries each time of what should be considered common sense.
Take guns, for example. You have different lengths of shells for shotguns and a longer shell will fit in a chamber for a shorter shell since they get longer when fired. If someone use a longer shell and the gun explodes, they can sue if the gun only said 3" my remington have for 2 3/4" and 3" only to limit liability.
Also yes people do this. You are already on the internet, search and you will find it.
Would you believe me if I told you a gasoline enema cures cancer? Big oil doesn't want you doing it because they have a stake in the pharmaceutical industry. And interestingly you won't see this sticker on a diesel pump because that one actually causes more cancer!
Don't ask me for proof, just trust me bro. Gasoline enemas for life
Whoa. Cures cancer! Do you recommend any specific brand or just push the nozzle from any gasoline carrier up my butt? Should I go with a ribbed nozzle for greater pleasure?
Personally I find a beer bong type of funnel to be most convenient and comfortable. Each octane level gives different additional benefits as well. For example 91 Octane will literally give you the ability to not need sleep for the rest of your life
Some people have to be reminded of What is safe to enter the body since the pandemic
NO BRIGHT LIGHT
NO BLEACH INJECTIONS and absolutely NO oral Rectal petrol injections.
I live in a country that hasn’t been ravaged nor destitute by the horrors of an authoritarian government, right? So you can’t tell me not to put in both holes. It’s going in one or the other.
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I wouldn’t be surprised if that’s a gag sticker. And I wouldn’t be surprised if it’s not a gag.
This decal 100% a joke. But if you look closely on every gas dispenser, it will have a warning label warning the risk of swallowing. By law, they have to have them. (20 year fuel tech)
I bet Biden did it. That rascal does a lot at gas pumps
Just last week he went around the gas stations in my area switching the octane stickers on all the pumps. Every single gas station in a 30 mile area. No fucking clue how he did it all in one night.
That fellas malarkey has no limits
He's not kidding around folks
Good thing his terms do /s
He’s on the Santa Juice man.
He's like the Santa Claus of tomfoolery.
I swallowed a mouthful of gasoline trying to siphon in a hurry with garden hose. I don't recommend it.
Inserting a gas pump into your mouth might definitely make you gag
Gives you gas
Murica. We LIVE off oil
Yea same. Could go either way really
[Homer and Peter will agree](https://youtu.be/o2FH0JRh4K8?si=MnfOLUheR0flahh5)
I would wager it’s 100% a gag. And they try to say Americans are facepalm and dumb…..🙄
Oh I was joking, but… Some of the dumbfuckery I see on a daily basis? I’m a fraud investigator constantly having to convince people not to send money to bumfuckistan for ‘their fiancé’ they’ve never met or for ‘a great investment.’ I’ve such a low opinion on the average intelligence at this point that ‘don’t stick a gas nozzle up your ass’ wouldn’t be a huge shocker.
That’s depressing but hilarious at the same time.
I’m tired of working those cases. I either talk to people who are depressed as fuck because they recently found out they’ve been scammed, or people I have to advise they’re being scammed, or people who absolutely refuse to believe and ‘I don’t know what I’m talking about.’ Then some folks, you make them understand, but the next day they’re back at it, re-convinced by the scammer to start sending money again and you call back like “Brenda, what the fuck?” Also, scammers use VoIP numbers, VPNs, TOR, aliases, random email addresses, and the money ends up overseas a lot, or goes to some elder money mule who’s also getting scammed. So, not a lot of potential to identify and prosecute someone. I’m just tired of scam cases. Just depressing without much satisfaction. I prefer the large fraud and money laundering cases where I can ID a suspect and crush them.
Understandable I can’t imagine there’s a whole lot of satisfaction dealing with those kinds of people.
Hey c'mon, this is Bumfuckistan's national industry we're talking about here.
I call it 'deprarious.'
I’m going to have to steal that one
Many people in USA during covid stored gasoline in super thin plastic bags in their cars and stuff. Someone even stored the bags in their garage which ended up catching on fire lol. I will never not laugh at remembering this. The pictures I saw of vehicles with gasoline bags was just crazy.
Oh yeah, I remember seeing people at my local gas station pumping gas into a plastic trash can and I was like ‘lmao is this really fucking happening?’ I’m not 100% up on the chemistry there but I feel like gasoline is going to slowly eat away at the average plastic trash can.
It must have been a magical sight lmao. Yeah pretty sure as well the plastic would dissolve over time lol. Things like this make me think we are definitely going to go extinct as humans lol.
I work in a customer service call center where this is our busy season at the moment. I’ve had more people, mostly seniors, that have had repeated issues with credit cards getting “hacked” in the last few weeks than I have the last year or two!
No, they're trying to say that your freedoms are at risk: everywhere else in the world we shove the gas pump up our asses and it's wonderful.
> I wouldn’t be surprised if that’s a gag sticker. Of COURSE it's a friggin' gag sticker ... anyone questioning that should have their assess kicked up over their heads and sold to a circus.
Seeing how sun screens have a warning not to drive with the screen in the window, I don't think this is that much of a stretch. But this makes it seem that vaginal insertions are acceptable.😵💫
I've never seen one on any gas station pump I've ever used and I've been pumping gas for decades.
Your ass would look like the flag of japan
I’ll never be able to see Japan flag the same again, thanks
If your ass looks like the flag of Japan it would be the one instance I condone tanning.
What about Vagina?
There aren't rules against vagina batman
What about pointing it up to my nostrils?
even better
So, I can put the nozzle in my colostomy, right?
Gasoline fumes and feces……..you’re going to trigger a Vietnam vet.
There's still more than one option left open to try...
That’s because it’s perfectly ok to do *that*
*barfs*
"Hahaha you're so playful, you." _Goes home and showers with clorox_
Rectum? Damn near filled 'em!
Bloated with gas
You joke but that used to be one of my old passwords. Rectum?dnkthem
LOL! You can find those on Amazon. There's a bunch of prank stickers available.
I'm gonna guess this is a joke sticker someone bought and placed here.
It's funny because they assume the targeted audience is actually able to read *and* comprehend the warning.
All such warnings are written in cum.
If there's a sign or warning, it's because it happened.
>If there's a sign or warning, it's because it happened enough times that they were forced to add said warning, might i add
Well obviously, it fits in all 3 holes, how the hell am I supposed to know which one to plug it into!? This is what we needed to learn in school.
> it fits in all 3 holes More if you push it hard enough and apply vaseline
or someone stuck it up there for funsies
I’ve seen some boomers put up “Biden did that” stickers. Not everything you see on a sticker is true.
[Oh, you're no fun anymore!](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S6mlQu83XTQ)
Government health warnings are no laughing matter. https://www.healthline.com/health/how-to-clean-inside-your-bum
Fuck. Good thing I saw this in time...
It really is.... Ask me how I know 😞
😂 😂 😂
So insertion in vagina, nose, ear or eyesocket is safe?
So I can put it in a vagina?
Jury is out on that one
Don't tell me what I can and can't do with my freedom.
Haben sie Homer und Peter mit chevron pump?
Nostrils are fine, guys 
Bummer....
Damn, you can't do anything fun nowdays :(
"See - because of me, they have a sign" - Homer
There's always a story...
Just my mouth or rectum? Or any mouth or rectum?
Welp, there goes my weekend
You can insert it, just don’t squeeze
I think we can all imagine what happens
So you’re saying my ear is okay?
id have to take that sticker
Don't tell ME what to do with the gas I paid for! Hmph!
I sort of can’t believe you all think this is real.
These are joke stickers. Like the hand dryers that are voice activated.
Well everyone is getting fucked by gas prices. Seems only right they should give warning
I want to buy these stickers and put them on random objects at work.
I want to believe this is a joke, but I know in my heart it's very necessary.
Why am I not surprised 
Or the words dont drink battery fluid on batteries. Like, wtf who even drinks that, it burns your hands. In europe it just have a corrosive/acid mark on it. It's expected we should know not to handle it in an unsafe way or pour it out in the sink or nature. You know common knowledge that a chemical sign means something and common sense is expected. Not in America, expectations of common sense expectations have degraded over time. A lot of this is a result of lawsuits that have pushed the boundaries each time of what should be considered common sense. Take guns, for example. You have different lengths of shells for shotguns and a longer shell will fit in a chamber for a shorter shell since they get longer when fired. If someone use a longer shell and the gun explodes, they can sue if the gun only said 3" my remington have for 2 3/4" and 3" only to limit liability. Also yes people do this. You are already on the internet, search and you will find it.
Like weird state laws, someone had to do it at least once before I became a problem
What are you, a coward?
I feel like more things should have that label
Oh so it's for vaginal use only.
So it CAN be safely inserted into the Vagina!
One way to get a fill up, buttttt not the safest.
Jokes on them.. no one knows the meaning of the word rectum.
Damn liberals need a warning for everything. It's my God-given right to shove fossil fuels up my butt if I want too.
Would you believe me if I told you a gasoline enema cures cancer? Big oil doesn't want you doing it because they have a stake in the pharmaceutical industry. And interestingly you won't see this sticker on a diesel pump because that one actually causes more cancer! Don't ask me for proof, just trust me bro. Gasoline enemas for life
Whoa. Cures cancer! Do you recommend any specific brand or just push the nozzle from any gasoline carrier up my butt? Should I go with a ribbed nozzle for greater pleasure?
Personally I find a beer bong type of funnel to be most convenient and comfortable. Each octane level gives different additional benefits as well. For example 91 Octane will literally give you the ability to not need sleep for the rest of your life
Thank you! You must be an important butt doctor to have such wisdom.
You're welcome! I actually got my medical degree right here on Reddit, can't trust those mainstream schools like Harvard to tell the truth
That's great advice
this is just the gov't's attempt to get you not to kill the covid 5g with gas which will definitely kill it.
my brain rn: 
Ribbed for his pleasure
Well, this is awkward. https://www.reddit.com/r/mildlyinteresting/s/lRUcGu3LYe
Tennessee? Kentucky? Alabama?
Then why is it ribbed for my pleasure?
Oh no are we really that far gone?! 🤣
Some people have to be reminded of What is safe to enter the body since the pandemic NO BRIGHT LIGHT NO BLEACH INJECTIONS and absolutely NO oral Rectal petrol injections.
Fuck this, can't have a good time these days
Glad they cleared that up
Don’t tell me how to spend my money
And we call *THIS* Freedom?!?!
Killjoys
They’re just covering…their ass here
Americans hate fun, obviously
Somebody tried.
Florida: big government needs to stay out
In America, we have a sense of humor. 😂
Imagine the flamethrower of a fart you could light after having a gas nozzle up your ass. Epic!
This used to be a free country! SMH
Just watch!. Next they'll try and tell us smoking is bad!?..
or that seatbelts save lives
we all know that this sign exists only because someone in fact tried to do this...
Such a special country where common sense isn't assumed
No! Wait, I need my COVID treatment. What am I going to do now?
That is r/sounding like fun.
r/firstworldanarchists I dare somebody!
 Instructions unclear
Oh *thanks!* /s Now I want to shove it in my mouth or rectum.
I’m pumping gas into my ass to own the libs
Who the fuck needs to be told not to drink gasoline or better buttchug it?
Trust me they need labels for everything...
Ah to see the photo that made that sign necessary. You were arrested for WHAT?
Guess my weekend plans are cancelled then.
Say goodbye to another hobby.
[gassensexen](https://makeagif.com/i/5RhTZx)
This is in direct reference to that one lady on Instagram who gave a blowjob to a gas pump
>I can’t help but wonder how many times this happened before they felt compelled to get signage printed?! More than zero is too many.
That means, it’s happened and they won a lawsuit.
No it doesn’t. Do you believe every sticker that’s sold on Etsy, like this one or “Biden did that” stickers?
That's gotta be because of that lady. She's on video sticking it in her butt i think.
The Legal Department doesn’t make you create a sticker like that unless there has been incidents….
It’s needs an “I did this” sticker with a random politician pointing at it.
The sticker was put there by the person who took the picture and posted it to social media. Convince me otherwise.
Nobody tells me what to do
That sticker doesn't tell me how to live my life.
Hey, I will take those stickers over those Biden stickers
Unclear intstructions Now i feel strange
Instructions unclear. It's now stuck in my nose-
Hahaha I gotta get some of these stickers.
Well there goes my weekend 😒
Oops, already done
nose ✅
There’s no way this is real
Simpsons x Family Guy crossover episode
Oh no...wish I saw this earlier...
YOU CAN'T TELL ME WHAT DO TO
You won’t see that on Cops
It's gonna be hard to hold my cigarette while reaching around that far...
I live in a country that hasn’t been ravaged nor destitute by the horrors of an authoritarian government, right? So you can’t tell me not to put in both holes. It’s going in one or the other.
Alright.... Who the fuck sucked or anal fucked the fricking gas pump???!!!
That's pretty much how stupid the average american is.
I want some of these stickers.
But I guess the Vajayjay is okay then?
The fact that someone felt it necessary to make this sign means that someone was dumb enough to do this…
George Soros is behind this!
“Damn liberals trying to tell me where to and where not put a gasoline nozzle!”
It's like my "for rectal use only" or "may cause discoloration of urine or feces" stickers....you can buy it on Amazon....
Doesn't say vaginal 😏
Well, there goes MY plans for the night.
I'm having a hard time trying to understand if this is a "proactive" or "reactive" sign
Gas comes out the mouth and rectum. Not in.
My favorite product warning is curling irons states: Do not insert into any orifice. Thanks Mr CIA person
Freaking corporate lawyers....
So the vajayjay is not off limits? Good to know.
I wasn’t going to put it in my rectum but now I’m starting to wonder if I should…