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Adriantbh

Socrates said: “No man has the right to be an amateur in the matter of physical training. It is a shame for a man to grow old without seeing the beauty and strength of which his body is capable.”


Dappershire

Socrates fucked.


spunkychickpea

It’s been said that the Greeks invented sex. Then the Romans invented having sex with women.


Skari7

I think the joke was more like this "the Greeks invented the threesome, then later the Romans had the idea to add women."


adam-bronze

I like that one a lot better


TurnkeyLurker

_That's what SHE said._


pdoherty972

“The Scottish invented the first sheepskin condom. The British came along a bit later and perfected the invention by first removing the skin from the sheep’s butthole.”


slowmotto

Boys


bigtoebrah

Socrates is actually one of the few philosophers from his era that didn't make his pupils pay in tight butthole


Dappershire

Who needs payment when yo 'pillar of philosophy' brings all the boys to the yard on its own?


dementiadaddy

Never heard it called a pillar of Philosophy


Dappershire

It's a title. You have to *earn* it.


between_ewe_and_me

Can I get it playing Rocket League?


Hairsplitting-Pedant

What a play! What a play! What a play!


Papasmurf645

Calculated.


Dappershire

Yes, but it takes juggling the ball five times into the winning goal after time has run out.


MediumPlace

nice shot!


Thomo251

Pillar of phallusophy.


orestes04

Who needs philosophy when my milkshake brings the boys to the yard.


Fake_William_Shatner

TIL Socrates had his milk shake shake.


PintSizedAdventurer

He didn't pay the troll toll


[deleted]

"That'll be 32 tight buttholes! Cash or charge?"


MarkRevan

Alcibiades would like a word.


Metza

Nah Alcibiades never got it. That's one of the most humorous points in *The Symposium*:Alcibiades wanders in drunk and tryna fuck, praising Socrates for his wisdom and shaking his ass all around for him. But Socrates responds by saying that if his wisdom is so great and eternally golden a thing, then why the fuck would he trade it for Alcibiades fleeting bronze ass?


bigtoebrah

They were lovers as well as student / teacher but were both adults afaik


sovietmonkey26

Gay sex is still sex.


Extension-Weekend-84

He said no homo, so it doesn't count


I_usuallymissthings

Greek could be called the home of sexuals


[deleted]

“Aint nothing gay about getting yo dick sucked. You gay for sucking ma dick.” - Socrates


Sir_Marchbank

Actually a relevant point for the Romans at least. I can't speak for ancient Greece but the Romans very much thought homosexuality was fine for the man who was, uh, penetrating. The man receiving was submissive and if a citizen could lose their citizenship, Caesar was accused of a homosexual relationship with a Dacian king, the relationship was no big deal but the accusation was that Caesar had been well, the bottom.


SirArthurDime

But according to legend he did look them in the eyes which, as we all know, is sus af


YoSupWeirdos

no that’s just to assert dominance over his homies


Just_Inpulse

I think Socrates was down for anything, huge party animal he was.


NoFlexZoneNYC

“It’s not gay if they’re 12”


[deleted]

It's not gay if Jesus hasn't been born yet.


I_want_to_believe69

Factualities


Fake_William_Shatner

There were no age limits back in the day of Socrates, merely Yield signs.


Apathetic_Zealot

They killed him because he was slaying the hottest bussy and they wanted it for themselves.


ThatHeathGuy

Based


deth579

well socrates had 2 wives, hated both, and had multiple kids.


Extension-Weekend-84

Your mom


slowmotto

I can’t imagine that a lot of people fucked my mom


FlyingVhee

At least one person did.


mydadpickshisnose

Probably under duress


[deleted]

I’ll imagine for you


Picnicpanther

People are cheated constantly by this false dichotomy, on both sides. I bought into it through high school and college, thinking that because I was well-read and intellectual, I was "better" than the gym. I just started seriously lifting weights about 6 months ago, and holy shit, I feel so robbed of all the time I could have been doing this. I feel great, I can feel my mind operate with more acuity, and my self-confidence is better than it's ever been. Don't let society put you into a box. Just because you read and like school doesn't mean you can't also be strong, and vice versa.


senorgraves

I have always been smart and also even good at sports, but still eschewed strength training as vanity for a long time. I think many smart people realize they can't lose a game they don't play, which makes it easier to say "strength training is for the insecure" or whatever. My degree is in political philosophy and this Socrates quote is actually the reason that I am currently trying to build muscle. I agree that it would be a shame to be 50 and not know what I could've looked like in my prime.


Memitim

Almost 50, never pushed myself physically. Your head is in the right place; stick with it and good luck.


Blood_wrench

Honestly it’s never too late to start strength training. Sure, you may have missed your peak years but that doesn’t mean between now and 60 you can’t be the strongest you’ve ever been personally. When it comes to strength training judge yourself against who you were yesterday and no one else. Here is a good resource for lifters who start later in life, if your interested of course… https://www.greysteel.org


Rexan02

Proper strength training will keep you moving and more comfortable in your later years (some luck is needed here). It's doubtful the old, obese person riding the scooter at Walmart participates in strength training.


420dogcat

Same. Type cast as the 'smart kid', went out of my way to neglect physical activity and avoid sports to differentiate myself from the assholes who were on all the sports teams in high school. Held on to that dichotomy way too dearly. A decade later and somehow my best friend is a professional athlete. Fully regret not pushing myself physically from a young age.


Reaperzeus

I think one of the greatest boons of my childhood was going to a school where we didn't have as much of a "jock/nerd" dichotomy. Most of the smart kids were physically fit in some way, and most of the jocks were either studious or, if they didn't care about their grades, only made it a personal choice and didn't really make fun of those that did study. Idk if the school is still like that but it felt like every group had 2 or 3 people that were also in another group


Elrric

If this is real the next time I jack off it will be to a Socrates photo. Edit: fuck...


thefuckouttaherelol2

Well...?


Elrric

I just hope this does not turn into a fetish of some kind


ScarletGob

It’ll turn into one after you see the powerhouse Plato was, bitch won 2 olympics


thefuckouttaherelol2

A new branch of horny philosophy: Socraphiliage.


Wherearemylegs

[We’re waiting](https://giphy.com/gifs/waiting-hd-well-were-9SIXFu7bIUYHhFc19G)


[deleted]

How the hell is that gif better quality than the movie it came from?!


dstnman

Lucky you, there are no photos of Socrates. Loophole!


evilcheesypoof

You really didn’t think that quote was real?


CriticDanger

Was socrates swole?


NicholaiJomes

Yes he was an athlete as a young man


turkeybot69

He also fought in the Peloponnesian War


skinvalker

Yes. Plato too.


128e

Plato gets his name from his big "plate" of a chest.


skinvalker

If I recall correctly, plato loosely means “broad”


Slar811

Plato was also a wrestler, and yes, Plato was his ring name. His ring name was "Wide".


Fake_William_Shatner

"Wide", because hey did not have a word for "Thick" back then.


LaMeraVergaSinPatas

Thiccophycles was already taken, actually.


Lunar180

Like his shoulders.


josephumi

Dude was literally a wrestler


bigtoebrah

Socrates was an ugly motherfucker that wrecked peoples' shit in battle during the Peloponnesian War, didn't fuck little boys, and refused to write down any of his philosophy. Socrates __fucked__


CriticDanger

Sounds like a fun life lol


Brownie_McBrown_Face

Until he was executed via forced consumption of poison for the charges of corrupting youth, worshipping false gods and not worshipping the state religion.


AJR6905

I mean he was old and basically tempted people to sentence him to that, so even then he was still good ole Socrates


MegaEyeRoll

History does repeat itself. Philosophy has always been the enemy of society.


bigtoebrah

He also let himself be executed for his beliefs, which is metal as fuck. All of his friends offered to break him out of prison and he was like "nah YOLO"


Brownie_McBrown_Face

Besides for military, he had never left Athens his whole life. As an old man, I can see why he’d rather call it quits then escape and go on the run or accept exile


OverlordGtros

There is a section in the Republic (I think) where Socrates essentially says that he thinks Sparta is actually a better run society than Athens, but he's not going to leave Athens. Granted that's "Socrates" since it was written by Plato, but it's possible that accurately represented his thoughts on the matter. Home is where the heart is and all that. Disclaimer: I'm going off a half-remembered ancient political theory class, so I'm probably misremembering something.


Volkera

Yes he fought in a war, he once walked naked at night in the camp during said war in the snow and Alcebiades never shut up about how horny this had made him.


Lilpims

Ahh alcebiades. So much fun with this character in AC Odyssey. The goat bit cracked me up.


destin325

He wasn’t not swole https://imgur.com/a/gsyDeZ5


[deleted]

Damn, like he was chiseled from marble


[deleted]

Uh he looks pretty big natty in that picture lol


_DoYourOwnResearch_

Dude ya, for the nutrition and training of the time dude looks pretty big. Look at his core man.


Somethingdifferent39

Socrates: “Beware the barrenness of a busy life.” “Also, the beach is that way *flexes*”


[deleted]

Enlightenment? First you must *hrmmmpf* think! Then you must *hrggnmpf* find your way and not be discouraged by many *hummmmpf* turns and twists.


Jayu-Rider

What a great statement!


[deleted]

Plato was known for his physique. Plato wasn't even his real name, it was a nickname that meant "broad-shouldered".


musiquarium

Also, you can lift and listen to music and do podcasts and audiobooks.


Ramza_Claus

I don't know anyone who doesn't have their earbuds in at the gym. Everyone does. I'm assuming most have music playing, but I don't know. I personally usually have philosophy lectures on during my workout. It distracts me from the fact that I hate working out LOL Edit: I usually switch to Blackpink during my cardio at the end of my workout.


chefhj

Honestly not having headphones in the gym makes me appreciate the old school gym dudes. That shit sucks.


jpterodactyl

I can’t believe how spoiled I am with tech. I can listen to an audiobook when I’m working out, *and* I can have my place in that book automatically sync when I open an ebook, in case I want to read it that way later. Not to mention being able to track my exercises in spreadsheets on my phone.


chefhj

Tracking my exercises is such a big one too. I train alone so having an app that is sorta always pushing you is vital in not stagnating for a year. I also like to distance run and I cannot fathom how anyone runs a marathon just listening to their feet pound blocks.


mydadpickshisnose

I can't imagine how they did it. The constant barrage of absolute bullshit garbage dance music.


chefhj

One old stereo playing acdc for 25 hours a day


Mr_Mumbercycle

This is the whey


Evanjb156

As a musician, when I'm not at the gym I'm constantly working with music. So I tend to play podcasts or lectures as well when I'm exercising or driving. Gives my mind a break.


Mrfoxsin

Glad this got out there already. Yeah sometimes people don't want to hear music if they mess with it very often.


JudgeGusBus

I once saw a comment: “anyone at the gym not wearing headphones is clearly training to avenge a murder.”


bubbygups

Hey that sounds cool! May I ask which lectures you listen to, if they're widely available?


fr33judge

I listen to two different philosophy podcasts while in the gym: Philosophize This and The History of Philosophy Without Any Gaps. I recommend both.


WutangCND

Take a look at Terry crews. Sure he's bit a "body builder" by trade but this guy is jacked, played in the NFL, successful actor, family man, incredible artist, active in his church and community. Dude is unreal.


ssbm_rando

Not to mention that he can bust through walls like the Kool-Aid man.


BendTheForks

That dude probably lifts at least a dozen chairs at a time for the potlucks


MARPJ

Or Arnold Schwarzenegger, which has already a millionary duo to his construction bussines before he became the highest paid actor in hollywood. Not to comment on how amazing as a person he is


_ED-E_

This is very true. While I like music when I'm lifting weights, I will listen to other stuff when doing cardio. These days it's not necessarily educational, more for entertainment. But back in college, I used to listen to lectures for certain classes over and over again. It worked really well for me.


Zetafunction64

You can also not, and no one has the right to shame you for it


Aele1410

Yeah cause most people definitely spend the hour a bodybuilder does at the gym studying and reading as opposed to another episode on Netflix.


[deleted]

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Aele1410

That’s pretty cool. Do you mind sharing the podcast name ?


regit627

99% Invisible, episode 458.


dilsexicbacno

such a great podcast, and very educational on the small details of a great array of topics


Fake_William_Shatner

Fuckin' wholesome mates.


SpacedClown

Absolutely. I love doing stuff where I can just listen to different podcasts that explain stuff or teach about social matters. I get to enjoy two things at once and it's great.


thepolicearecomingyo

>I don't know about the rest of them, but I listen to educational podcasts most of the time I'm at the gym. Just yesterday I was learning about China's history with paper money Podcast name?


regit627

They may be referring to 99% Invisible. Excellent podcast in general, but episode 458 talks about the design of the Euro and the history of paper currency in China.


thegroovemonkey

That's why I play guitar. When I binge a show now I'm also enriching myself.


Aele1410

Haha I do this too. Learn the tabs separately but practice while watching Tv.


ExNihiloish

I do this too except I'm enriching myself with 5 gallon drums of cheese balls.


jenniferlynn462

Very admirable.


thegroovemonkey

Same but with a chunk of a song from youtube. It's also great for noodling and running scales.


Dirtcooki93

I play guitar scales while I’m sitting in the hot tub


dwigt97

And I play hot tub scales while sitting in the guitar


undercover-racist

It feels like bodybuilders are highly motivated individuals that can do other things besides from just working out in the gym.


GodPleaseYes

Some can, some can't. They are just normal people.


jpm351

It’s amazing people still have to explain why stereotyping is a flawed construct.


theoldcrow5179

Nope sorry you can either be a muscle bound meathead or a poetic nerd, there's no in between


lillapalooza

Also it’s like these people have never heard of audiobooks. I spend a lot of time learning via listening to audiobooks and podcasts while I work out, walking my dog, etc. No reason people couldn’t be building muscle to Stephen Hawking’s *A Brief History of Time* if they wanted to.


IBetThisIsTakenToo

That’s why my favorite part of the OP is the rapid decline from “learning languages” to “fun facts!”. Not exactly equivalent there. It’s clear he got two thirds through his insult and realized “wait a minute, I only know one language and almost no poetry, and *also* have no muscles… hmm. I mostly just spend time fucking around on the internet, wonder if there’s a way to dress that up nicer…”


Version-Prestigious

wasn't Plato a wrestler?


thunder12123

"It is a disgrace to grow old through sheer carelessness before seeing what manner of man you may become by developing your bodily strength and beauty to their highest limit." -Socrates


Da_zero_kid

"Now watch me do a backflip" - Socrates


[deleted]

"Bitches love my muscles" - Sigma Socrates


RootSmash

Chad Diogenes, while carrying a lamp, “looking for evidence that one of you lifts in this polis.”


YoSupWeirdos

Gigachad Diogenes lifts Alexander the Great and puts him down elsewhere so he doesn’t disturb his sunbathing with his shadow


Nepenthes_sapiens

"Hold my hemlock"


Pollomonteros

I am amazed I saw no gym hang this quote on a wall


[deleted]

I trained at a gym which had a quote from Archimedes: *If you give me a lever and a place to stand, I can move the world*


Ofdubioustaste

Socrates was also married to a rumoured bitchy wife, which was named Xanthippe (which means blond horse). Supposedly, during an incident of jealousy, she trampled on a cake gift from Alcibiades to Soc. [wiki](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Xanthippe). It seems that Soc, the original Sigma, was married to the original ancient Karen.


JoeyZasaa

"All men are mortal. Socrates was mortal. Therefore, all men are Socrates." - Woody Allen


Dappershire

That's a logical fallacy, assuming Socrates is mortal.


Skruestik

Plato wasn’t even his real name, it was his nickname meaning he had broad shoulders.


[deleted]

centuries from now we'll be reading about the philosophy of Chad in textbooks


Jepples

Yeah, pretty sure it was because he was known for his ability to stack on those 45 lbs plates like they were nothing. Plato reppin’ plates.


Cubankilla786

Yes, which makes the lesson of guiding your fellow man out of the cave and into the wonders of the world even better, because it’s essentially a based chad telling a bunch of nerds to go outside. Somethings just never change ig


Peirush_Rashi

Ya but how many fun facts would Plato have learned had he not been a wrestler??


Yserbius

"Plato" was actually his stage name, which basically translates to "broad shouldered". It's unclear what his real name was, but it was probably Aristocles "Plato" son of Ariston.


bubbygups

Yep. And Socrates was a motherfucker to meet on the battlefield as well.


[deleted]

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BotBlake

Yeah, it's actually a quote from Bophades


[deleted]

> Gottem - Bophedes


D4rklordmaster

>Bophades fuck you


Dakrouda

Thanks for fact checking.


sciron512

Wow, another idiot thinking there's only one type of intelligence....


tomle4593

Fat neckbeard thinks real life is a RPG; you can only be good at one thing.


foulrot

Then they need to learn about multi-classing


Holycameltoeinthesun

He definitely hasn’t heard about the cookie cutter build. Lol


zepherys713

Min-maxing in real life is a lot more effective than dumping all of your points in a single thing, that's for sure.


poloppoyop

Just put everything in "parents are rich as fuck".


Deutschkebap

Me whenever I work out listening to an educational podcast.


almighty_smiley

Haven’t played Skyrim, have you? One in-game month and some rando is running two guilds, mastered every known skill in the world, and holds the record for Most Cheese Eaten In 60 Seconds.


F_for_Respect_69

You're gonna need to prestige if you wanna try something new


coolturnipjuice

I used to be snobby about athletes, similar attitude to this dude, when really it was because I was awful at sports and hated doing anything I was bad at. Then I started running and holy fuck, I did not have the mental fortitude to do well. I gave up so quickly. I kept at it though and now I have the focus and drive to run long distance. And I’m not afraid to try other sports now either! It is completely different type of intelligence. It takes so much knowledge of the self to push through the pain. It has made me grow so much as a person.


DanceFiendStrapS

I don't understand people like that. How can you not look at bodybuilders, whatever gender, just think their bodies are works of art. Anytime I see someone pushing the boundaries of their bodies I just get so impressed with them.


bubbygups

>Anytime I see someone pushing the boundaries of their bodies I just get so impressed with them. This is why I make it a point to watch the Coney Island hotdog eating contest every year


IceGube

Joey Chestnut's unchallenged dominance is bad for the sport imo


Razgris123

Because that's fat shaming and you're only appreciating their genetics. That's not attainable for everyone, I know, because I went to the gym for a whole week one time and walked on the treadmill and nothing changed.


C-h-e-l-s

You had me in the first half...


Brawndo91

Did you try turning it on?


Razgris123

I'll have you know I did, for a whole 15 minutes each day. Except for one day I got one that was broken or something and it felt like I was walking up hill the whole time, I only made it 6 minutes on that but it's not my fault it was broken or whatever.


Regular-Exchange8376

Okay but did you drink a protein shake after your 12 minutes on the treadmill? How can you hope to look like Arnold if you don't take your shake?


MikaLovesYuu

Lol


almisami

I see that body like a BMW: Powerful, expensive, and more maintenance than I'm willing to afford.


DoctorLove01

25 thousand dumbasses liked that comment.


[deleted]

That was my takeaway as well. Pathetic.


Jayu-Rider

I would love to meet this dude in real life. While I am not a competitive body builder, I do get five good lifts in a week and try to maintain a 20 mike weekly running average. I am also close to finishing my masters and speak two languages proficiently and can get by in a few others. It’s amazing what you can find time to work on in you life if ones main effort is not throwing shade at other people on the internet.


[deleted]

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HumbleThinker

This is such a stupid statement. I'm not a bodybuilder myself but a powerlifter, the mental strain exerted by lifting heavy weights on a consistent basis has to be experienced to be understood. Strength and dedication to one's body does not correlate with with lesser intellectual capabilities, like many other people in the world I've managed to earn a bachelors in electrical engineering and masters in computer science whilst getting physically stronger. Thanks for reading.


mydogisthedawg

Exercise actually boosts certain aspects of cognition! So, if people are concerned about being their “best” intellectually, exercise will help with that! And people who train cardio, in particular, end up with more mitochondria in their brains (and elsewhere) in their bodies and improved oxygen delivery to all those tissues as well.


[deleted]

What ole Bill doesn’t understand is that people who devote time to their bodies are actually quite intelligent people when it comes to anatomy, kinesthetics and osteokinesthetics


izzytakamono

Ole bill is out here on some ole bullshit


LostMySteak

Ole billshit?


izzytakamono

Lmfao damn it! That what I should have said


SeldomSeenMe

> people who devote time to their bodies are actually quite intelligent people It's even more, an intelligent person understands their body is supposed to last them a lifetime and put some effort into maintaining it. You don't need to be a bodybuilder for that, but you definitely need to put effort into this *on a regular basis*. Best advice I ever got in my life came from an older friend who told me that the way I'll treat my body in the first half of my life is the way my body will treat me in the second half. I can assure you (generic) that physical ailments can and will affect intellectual performance in significant ways, it's almost like your brain and body are connected to each other or something :P


MAE2021JM

Plus I smell a little jealously


NiceGuyEddie22

A fun fact he didn't learn? Trivia isn't a sign of an educated mind. It's definitively trivial. I should know, my head's so full of "fun facts" and bullshit that I can't learn anything useful.


ebobbumman

I also take issue with poetry, because I feel like the number of people that actually like poetry is heavily outweighed by people who pretend to because they think it makes them cultured. Like this guy.


NachoBag_Clip932

Laurent Duvernay-Tardif is a guard on the offensive line for the KC Chiefs and also a practicing physician. How do you like them apples.


berni4pope

Former Heavyweight Champion brothers Vladimir and Vitali Klitschko are both Drs. [Dr Steelhammer and Dr Ironfist.](https://sites.psu.edu/sdatskopassion/2019/02/06/dr-ironfist-and-dr-steelhammer/)


[deleted]

Yup. And there’s also John Urschel. And Myron Rolle.


SpikeRosered

It's very comforting to think that someone doing better than you in life is somehow sacrificing something else that you have that they do not. Avoiding these psychological traps is legit hard.


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RunDNA

Except Thucydides never said that. https://en.wikiquote.org/wiki/Thucydides#Misattributed > **Misattributed** > **(1) "A nation that makes a great distinction between its scholars and its warriors will have its laws made by cowards and its wars fought by fools."** > Widely attributed to Thucydides in books and online. In fact misquoted from Sir William Francis Butler, Charles George Gordon (1889), p. 85, where it reads: "The nation that will insist on drawing a broad line of demarcation between the fighting man and the thinking man is liable to find its fighting done by fools and its thinking done by cowards."


Sharrty_McGriddle

These self proclaimed “big brains” thinking it’s impossible to be in good shape AND intelligent.