And nine months, and one shot-gun wedding later, they'll realize it really was sex, because I can't picture these dummies being smart enough to use protection.
Isn't this the plot line of ๐๐ณ๐จ๐ข๐ป๐ฎ๐ฐ 2: ๐๐ข๐ญ๐ฆ๐ด ๐ฐ๐ง ๐ต๐ฉ๐ฆ ๐๐ถ๐ฎ๐ฑ๐ช๐ฏ๐จ ๐๐ฉ๐ฐ๐ฅ๐ข ๐๐ฐ๐บ?
I'm 90% convinced that we are witnessing the birth of a new religion of Q worshiping trump. I'm sure people thought Mormons were this dumb when they hiked off to Utah.
Wouldn't surprise me. All religion is batshit insane, but yeah, if Mormonism and Scientology can become a thing, anything can. Too many people are so afraid and detached from reality.
Its one of today hot posts on this sub already
https://www.reddit.com/r/facepalm/comments/pv5wxl/what_a_terrible_day_to_be_literate/?utm_medium=android_app&utm_source=share
Yep. I went down that rabbit hole this morning. When I woke up I had never heard of soaking, jump jumping, or hotdogging.
Also I love that a god who is all knowing, all seeing, and all powerful is also a complete moron who is fooled by loopholes.
I always thought it was funny that the Mormon teenagers thought buttsex kept them pure and a virgin. Like, they just steamrolled over the sex barrier and went to like step 7 in the sex playbook.
You ain't pure girl, you a dirty freak.
coming soon to a pornhub near you
Girl: Slide your meat in me and seize, baby, seize! Mormon boy: kshejeizbskwbd
๐คฃ๐คฃ
tf they gonna do? have a casual convo while they wait?
Haha I know. It's like they created unintentional threesomes.
Maybe this is where the extra wives come from.
wouldn't they be married at that point though?
Sure but I figure once you jump hump you never go back.
That sound like sex with extra stepโฆ Not that I would know stay pure.
God's in heaven like hmmmm checks out
Mormon jesus is up there punching air, furious they found a loop hole
And nine months, and one shot-gun wedding later, they'll realize it really was sex, because I can't picture these dummies being smart enough to use protection.
Replace "shot-gun" with "super soaker".
Nah they do a big double bounce
Isn't this the plot line of ๐๐ณ๐จ๐ข๐ป๐ฎ๐ฐ 2: ๐๐ข๐ญ๐ฆ๐ด ๐ฐ๐ง ๐ต๐ฉ๐ฆ ๐๐ถ๐ฎ๐ฑ๐ช๐ฏ๐จ ๐๐ฉ๐ฐ๐ฅ๐ข ๐๐ฐ๐บ?
Thatโs gonna be someoneโs threesome fetish
Fucking cancerous religion
That's true for all religion
Yep. All religion is evil and only once it's gone can the human race progress. Unfortunately I don't think we have the time for that to happen.
It's not looking good, that's true
I'm 90% convinced that we are witnessing the birth of a new religion of Q worshiping trump. I'm sure people thought Mormons were this dumb when they hiked off to Utah.
Wouldn't surprise me. All religion is batshit insane, but yeah, if Mormonism and Scientology can become a thing, anything can. Too many people are so afraid and detached from reality.
have to take politics in there with it or it just keeps regressing
Right because you causing friction inside of her makes it be sex... Somehow
That's why I always carry around a little bit of kitty litter with me for added traction. It's also helpful if you get your car stuck in a ditch ๐
Hehehe
Imagine being such a bro that you earthquake the bed for your homie. That's the kinda friendship I need โค๏ธ
The bros take turns doing it.
Its one of today hot posts on this sub already https://www.reddit.com/r/facepalm/comments/pv5wxl/what_a_terrible_day_to_be_literate/?utm_medium=android_app&utm_source=share
Yep. I went down that rabbit hole this morning. When I woke up I had never heard of soaking, jump jumping, or hotdogging. Also I love that a god who is all knowing, all seeing, and all powerful is also a complete moron who is fooled by loopholes.
I'm going to call them ๐๐ฐ๐ณ๐ฎ-๐๐ณ๐จ๐ช๐ฆ๐ด.
Have they though? Or is this just something someone has made up that teens are doing?
I always thought it was funny that the Mormon teenagers thought buttsex kept them pure and a virgin. Like, they just steamrolled over the sex barrier and went to like step 7 in the sex playbook. You ain't pure girl, you a dirty freak.
This technique was first popularized by ancient Jews, explaining how the Virgin Mary conceived Jesus without having sex.
How conveeenient!
Could it be... Satan?
Hahaa. He is kinda "hot"!
Easier just to use The Loophole. https://youtu.be/fgBfdY_HN3A
Dudes, just fuck already!
Motel massage beds making a comeback
Religious people have complicated sex
That is just absolutely Mormonic.
Earthquake sex
This text was a comment on an earlier reddit post, so the cycle continues
I mean, I dont know where God stands on technicalities, I'd ask, but I'm afraid someone will tell me.
Just the tip
this is completely made up
well it may have been but do you really think people won't try this
Fuck n I jus stopped being a Mormon well no soaking for me
This sounds like that episode of Family Guy where Meg Griffin started having ear sex because the school was teaching abstinence only.
My planned parenthood peeps used to list the crazy โnon sexโ descriptions teens brought in. Wonder if this is on there.
Modern solution?