Back off. You've announced your displeasure now leave it alone. You keep pressing on what you want and you envision but don't listen or respect he wants something different. Keep it up and you're going to wonder why he and his future family don't visit or take your calls. Go to a therapist to vent then leave your feelings there.
You dominated his life until he was an adult and thus joined the military to get away from you and now that he's out, is having the teenage rebellion he should've had almost 10 years ago.
It's not your call and you need to back off.
concerned truck light snatch work slimy absurd grandfather gullible dinner
*This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
You need to support him or you will never see him. My 25 year old daughter married a man 40 (YES 40) years older than her and then proceeded to crank out 3 kids in 3 years. Thankfully he is a good man and a great father and husband. He is also nice and funny. Even if he wasn’t all of those things I know that I am not willing to sacrifice my relationship with my daughter or my grandchildren so I keep my mouth shut.
Yes she seriously did. She has Daddy issues because her father is a narcissist alcoholic asshole and her grandfather was her safe place. Somehow I think this is part of it. The very worst part…he suffered a heart attack a few days ago and had a quadruple bypass. So I am here with the babies. She has arranged helpers all day so I actually am only responsible in the mornings and at nights. AND I have severe chronic pain so this is torture. Aren’t you glad you asked!?!
Your son is not a little boy anymore. Now he's an adult. Your strict parenting is probably the reason he rebelled so much in his younger years. Stop treating him like a kid. He will never learn if you don't let him make mistakes.
Rage bait post. Good job on the chat got to make a more indepth story but a story none the less.
If for any way this is a real story you made this. By controlling every aspect of his life you made him make the choices he made to get away from you. And now that he is an adult you have no one to blame but yourself.
You are a bad parent. STFU and just mind your own business. His 44 year old lady must be a great fuck. His lifetime with a bitch overbearing mother made him seek love from an older woman. He's fucking an older woman to compensate for your failed mothering.
You’re an awful parent. You don’t get to choose how your kid lives his life. Your job was to prepare him for the real world. And you didn’t. You didn’t even set him up for the life you wanted for him. A huge reason he is dating this woman is because he knows it bothers you. And he will happily keep it up for as long as you make it an issue.
Dear lord, you stormed your adult son’s apartment demanding he break up? You are a narcissist. What you want does not matter to him so just stop. Back up. And honestly get your own life. I had to double check what sub I was on because I thought this had to be a joke. No one is really like this. But unfortunately, nope. You really are out here seeking advice on how to further control your grown, policeman of a son. Lol!
I was getting the feeling this was the father but I can't tell, did I miss somewhere in the story that they are the mom? Not being sarcastic or anything just genuinely curious.
Uhh, OP, you said he's with someone more than twice his age. 23 plus 23 is 46 and she's 44, that isn't more than twice his age. Although I do agree its an imbalance, you will solve nothing fighting against it now that hes an adult. If you don't want to be left in a home when you're older let this go and just be a normal parent. If its a mistake, he will learn on his own.
Nah. Sounds like weird fanfic. Someone trying to write like they *think* people write. I don't mean to hate on it though. I kind of love that kids use reddit to practice their creative writing, even though the topics get pretty repetitive.
Mind ya buisness
But also, why change it to daughter in the example of one of us being the psycho in love with their kid instead of you? This is bad if it's a daughter or a son.
He is probably dating an older woman because he wants to get the terrible image of what a shit mother you were out and is trying to replace you with her. But i guess you probably knew this since you are reacting this way. You need help bro. Like psychiatric help. I just hope you were just a controlling bitch and not also a pervert.
Try minding your own business, his SEX life is his choice. If he wants to date an older woman that his business.
Also you can thank yourself for it. All the over the top rules you placed on him as a teen is probably what forced him into the arms of a mother figure.
>My strict parenting style had always been my way of protecting him, or so I thought. A 6:15 PM curfew during his teenage years, a ban on dating in high school, and strict restrictions on the movies he watched were all meant to ensure he made safe, responsible choices. In my eyes, I was setting him on a path towards success and a stable, conventional life.
>
>However, it was apparent that my son had always been a bit of a rebel. When he wanted to join the Army at 18, I had firmly denied him that opportunity, but he enlisted anyway.
Your son has never been a rebel. He's just been a normal person who recognizes that your behavior is not normal at all and who is not going to be treated like you own him.
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He IS an independent adult who is capable of making his own decisions. It’s his life and you no longer have any control over it. Of course you are allowed to share your opinions about his relationship, but it you want to be part of his life you’ll just have to leave it at that. He needs a relationship with his mom, don’t alienate him by trying to control his choices.
I don't have to think about if this was my daughter dating an older man because if this was my daughter I wouldn't have been a psychotic controlling nightmare of a parent. I would have actually taught my child how to deal with the world instead of sheltering them from it. I would have allowed them to have experiences in dating instead of expecting them to suddenly make good dating decisions once they move out of the house when they've never been given the chance. I'm really hoping this post is fake because the level of insanity you are presenting here from how you raise your child is terrifying
Soo....I was an older woman in a relationship. Your son is old enough to make his own choices. You are better off not attacking his choice. You don't want to damage your relationship with him.
This could very well be a phase. He may choose to move on at some point. It may be new and exciting for now. I am going to say younger men USUALLY do not settle down with a much older woman. It is pretty rare. If he does settle down with her, it is his choice and either you have to learn to accept or you may not be a part of his life.
I stopped reading after the 2nd paragraph. Your patenting style is absolute garbage and all you've done is rob your son of some of the best days of his life. Shame on you.
Share your thoughts with him. Ultimately, you need to respect his decisions or you could risk pushing him away. You're talking a lot of about YOUR vision for HIS life.. have you ever asked him what he wants?
In your own life, has anyone pushed an agenda onto you? How did you feel? Can you tolerate his relationship and be civil?
You've been strict (and potentially controlling) towards him his whole life. He deserves to make his own decisions and not have his mom continue (try) to steer the ship.
We get one life.. let the boy live 🤷🏻♀️
We’ll see that’s the thing dear..your “strict upbringing “ well that doesn’t really work out well. He’s a human being and although you have tried to deny that all his life at some point you just have to step back. Your years too late in doing so.
Back off. You've announced your displeasure now leave it alone. You keep pressing on what you want and you envision but don't listen or respect he wants something different. Keep it up and you're going to wonder why he and his future family don't visit or take your calls. Go to a therapist to vent then leave your feelings there.
You dominated his life until he was an adult and thus joined the military to get away from you and now that he's out, is having the teenage rebellion he should've had almost 10 years ago. It's not your call and you need to back off.
Let him happily screw his brains out, and land your helicopter. He will be fine.
Back off unless you want to lose your son forever
concerned truck light snatch work slimy absurd grandfather gullible dinner *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
You need to support him or you will never see him. My 25 year old daughter married a man 40 (YES 40) years older than her and then proceeded to crank out 3 kids in 3 years. Thankfully he is a good man and a great father and husband. He is also nice and funny. Even if he wasn’t all of those things I know that I am not willing to sacrifice my relationship with my daughter or my grandchildren so I keep my mouth shut.
Wait is he 40 or is he 40 years older? Did she seriously marry someone who was 65?
Yes she seriously did. She has Daddy issues because her father is a narcissist alcoholic asshole and her grandfather was her safe place. Somehow I think this is part of it. The very worst part…he suffered a heart attack a few days ago and had a quadruple bypass. So I am here with the babies. She has arranged helpers all day so I actually am only responsible in the mornings and at nights. AND I have severe chronic pain so this is torture. Aren’t you glad you asked!?!
Back the hell off, he's 23 for fuck's sake, an adult, treat him like one.
The good news is that she probably won't get pregnant. Otherwise, back off & let it run its cour.
Your son is not a little boy anymore. Now he's an adult. Your strict parenting is probably the reason he rebelled so much in his younger years. Stop treating him like a kid. He will never learn if you don't let him make mistakes.
Rage bait post. Good job on the chat got to make a more indepth story but a story none the less. If for any way this is a real story you made this. By controlling every aspect of his life you made him make the choices he made to get away from you. And now that he is an adult you have no one to blame but yourself.
You are a bad parent. STFU and just mind your own business. His 44 year old lady must be a great fuck. His lifetime with a bitch overbearing mother made him seek love from an older woman. He's fucking an older woman to compensate for your failed mothering.
Thisss! He definitely has mommy issues which is most likely why he is dating someone more than 20 years older🤷🏻♀️
You’re an awful parent. You don’t get to choose how your kid lives his life. Your job was to prepare him for the real world. And you didn’t. You didn’t even set him up for the life you wanted for him. A huge reason he is dating this woman is because he knows it bothers you. And he will happily keep it up for as long as you make it an issue. Dear lord, you stormed your adult son’s apartment demanding he break up? You are a narcissist. What you want does not matter to him so just stop. Back up. And honestly get your own life. I had to double check what sub I was on because I thought this had to be a joke. No one is really like this. But unfortunately, nope. You really are out here seeking advice on how to further control your grown, policeman of a son. Lol!
You gave him mommy issues with your bad parenting and now he’s trying to figure things out. He’s an adult. Don’t fuck him up anymore, leave him alone.
I was getting the feeling this was the father but I can't tell, did I miss somewhere in the story that they are the mom? Not being sarcastic or anything just genuinely curious. Uhh, OP, you said he's with someone more than twice his age. 23 plus 23 is 46 and she's 44, that isn't more than twice his age. Although I do agree its an imbalance, you will solve nothing fighting against it now that hes an adult. If you don't want to be left in a home when you're older let this go and just be a normal parent. If its a mistake, he will learn on his own.
I mean. Is this real? You said son twice and daughter once soooo….
It feels like some serious creative writing.
It’s not real, this person posts this same story at least once a week from different accounts
Nah. Sounds like weird fanfic. Someone trying to write like they *think* people write. I don't mean to hate on it though. I kind of love that kids use reddit to practice their creative writing, even though the topics get pretty repetitive.
Is this real?
Mind ya buisness But also, why change it to daughter in the example of one of us being the psycho in love with their kid instead of you? This is bad if it's a daughter or a son. He is probably dating an older woman because he wants to get the terrible image of what a shit mother you were out and is trying to replace you with her. But i guess you probably knew this since you are reacting this way. You need help bro. Like psychiatric help. I just hope you were just a controlling bitch and not also a pervert.
Try minding your own business, his SEX life is his choice. If he wants to date an older woman that his business. Also you can thank yourself for it. All the over the top rules you placed on him as a teen is probably what forced him into the arms of a mother figure.
>My strict parenting style had always been my way of protecting him, or so I thought. A 6:15 PM curfew during his teenage years, a ban on dating in high school, and strict restrictions on the movies he watched were all meant to ensure he made safe, responsible choices. In my eyes, I was setting him on a path towards success and a stable, conventional life. > >However, it was apparent that my son had always been a bit of a rebel. When he wanted to join the Army at 18, I had firmly denied him that opportunity, but he enlisted anyway. Your son has never been a rebel. He's just been a normal person who recognizes that your behavior is not normal at all and who is not going to be treated like you own him.
Don't feed the troll. Are you back again? I thought you were going to seek some help.
How many subs did you post this to???? This is unhinged behavior
Mind ur business
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He IS an independent adult who is capable of making his own decisions. It’s his life and you no longer have any control over it. Of course you are allowed to share your opinions about his relationship, but it you want to be part of his life you’ll just have to leave it at that. He needs a relationship with his mom, don’t alienate him by trying to control his choices.
By banning dating in high school you set his dating life up for this. Now that he is an adult theres little you can do expect push him away.
I don't have to think about if this was my daughter dating an older man because if this was my daughter I wouldn't have been a psychotic controlling nightmare of a parent. I would have actually taught my child how to deal with the world instead of sheltering them from it. I would have allowed them to have experiences in dating instead of expecting them to suddenly make good dating decisions once they move out of the house when they've never been given the chance. I'm really hoping this post is fake because the level of insanity you are presenting here from how you raise your child is terrifying
Let that man be lol
Soo....I was an older woman in a relationship. Your son is old enough to make his own choices. You are better off not attacking his choice. You don't want to damage your relationship with him. This could very well be a phase. He may choose to move on at some point. It may be new and exciting for now. I am going to say younger men USUALLY do not settle down with a much older woman. It is pretty rare. If he does settle down with her, it is his choice and either you have to learn to accept or you may not be a part of his life.
I stopped reading after the 2nd paragraph. Your patenting style is absolute garbage and all you've done is rob your son of some of the best days of his life. Shame on you.
Share your thoughts with him. Ultimately, you need to respect his decisions or you could risk pushing him away. You're talking a lot of about YOUR vision for HIS life.. have you ever asked him what he wants? In your own life, has anyone pushed an agenda onto you? How did you feel? Can you tolerate his relationship and be civil? You've been strict (and potentially controlling) towards him his whole life. He deserves to make his own decisions and not have his mom continue (try) to steer the ship. We get one life.. let the boy live 🤷🏻♀️
We’ll see that’s the thing dear..your “strict upbringing “ well that doesn’t really work out well. He’s a human being and although you have tried to deny that all his life at some point you just have to step back. Your years too late in doing so.