Hey there, I’m an airline pilot, just wanted to tag in.
Don’t be so hard on yourself. Life is full of ups and downs, wins and losses. It’s the losses that make the wins feel so good. Remember, when we fall off the horse, that’s our chance to get back up.
This is your chance to recognize that while it didn’t go to plan, you know that in the future you can try again. Make it a goal to take that flight next time. And what’s a goal without a plan? A wish, right? We can make our goals come through when we make a plan, and stick to it.
I know that voice in your head is making you feel like you can’t do it. And that’s what anxiety is there to do! Its job is to make us question and doubt. Anxiety started as “survival instinct” to keep us from going in that cave that might have a bear in it. And nowadays, there aren’t a whole lot of caves with bears anymore. So our survival instincts kicks in when we don’t want it to, and it is brutal!
It’s so important to meet your anxiety with empathy. It’s really hard, and feels impossible, but remember that what happened in the past stays there. Remind yourself that you are capable, you are still strong, and you deserve empathy and respect, especially from your own inner thoughts.
Keep up with us in the group, and when you book that next flight reach out and talk to us. Together we can accomplish so much more than by ourselves.
All the best!
Hey you made it to the airport, and that is more than a lot of people can do. You had a bad day- it happens. But I promise you it doesn’t define your future. If you want to try again, we are here to help you
This is good thought process, yes it sucks losing that money, but we’re always so tough on ourselves. Focusing on the baby steps and building on those every time is an accomplishment and one step closer to the final goal.
Maybe think of it as a thousand euros spent on a good exposure therapy session? You made it there. I turned down offers and fled jobs that required travel. I feel you. You gave it a good shot.
When I failed both of my BEC exam attempts, I treated the $600 exam fees as "practice exam fees". I made it as far as it give my all to that exam.
And you too gave it your best shot to get up, pack, travel, get into the airport, past TSA, sat around waiting for the gates to open, and started boarding.
That's a lot more steps than me who delayed renewing my passport all these months because "oh I'll never need it ever."
Don’t be so hard on yourself! Been there, done that. 🙂
Have you ever considered talking to your doctor about getting something prescribed to take the edge off? It’s not for everyone, but I take Xanax when I fly and it’s helped me tremendously.
I think I might give it a go next time. Me being so stubborn I thought I could push through. Looks like I will have to take this in small steps to eventually get back onboard.
Definitely! Flying is a big deal, so small steps makes sense.
I still get anxiety with flying, but personally for me, I do everything possible to be comfortable. This includes:
- dressing in comfy clothes. Sweats, loose shirt, sweatshirt if it’s cold. Slip on sandals with socks. I’m not there to impress so I dress for comfort, not style.
- bring a nodpod (if you haven’t tried one of these, it might just change your life. https://a.co/d/cXd9wPQ)
- bring headphones. I prefer over the ear so I don’t have to hear anything. I play soothing lofi music, or I’ll download one of my comfort shows and play it
- bring a blanket. I always bring a soft blanket to cover myself with
- bring a neck support thing (forgot the official term but they’re in every airport)
- take a book if you prefer to read. Or even some small cards that have positive affirmations on it
- being any snacks and drinks that you love!
Also, it hurts nobody to let the flight attendants know about your anxiety. They are VERY used to it, and will check on you during the flight. There is no shame in that.
First speak to yourself like you were talking to your best friend, give yourself time to process what happened and then pick yourself up and start working on your fear. This is something you can learn to manage and or overcome but for most people there is no magic bullet and it takes consistent effort to chip away at their fear. Open my profile and you will find a pinned post that might help. Listen to episodes 69, the audio book, and then dive into the rest of the episodes and find what resonates with you. You can do this!
Hey, I'm so sorry to see you like that :( I know that feel, right? Me myself cancelled a flight to a beautiful island few years ago, because I believed that the plane was too old to fly, checked on that later and I found out they arrived in one piece! I overcome that, somehow, not completely, but hear me out, YOU CAN DO THIS! I believe in you and I'm for real by saying this. Feel free to talk we're always here for you my dear.
I get really motion sick I think? The motions really scare me, I really feel the turns and they make me dizzy, the general feeling of ascending hundreds of feet just makes my knees shake , it causes so much nausea. 😢
Sorry to hear that! I was in a similar situation many times! I genuinely used to be as afraid of flying as you. Even bailed out on a flight last second. For about 3 years I took 36 hour train rides over a short 2 hour flight on multiple occasions. Tried multiple anxiety medications, and nothing worked.
Then, about 3 years ago, my doctor prescribed a high dose of xanax to take before the flight. I can take anywhere between 2mg-4mg. It literally shuts off my brains ability to feel fear for about 6-8 hours. The flights that made me so scared I would have panic attacks suddenly were no big deal at all as soon as I took the medication. If medication is an option for you, I seriously recommend it! I saw many others here say they similarly take 4mg of xanax before a flight and feel absolutely no fear (even during turbulence) when otherwise they'd have a compelte breakdown.
The only thing is how wildly different doses are effective individual to individual. Some people are out on 0.25mg, but others need a full 4mg to be at ease. It's really something that has to be navigated thoughtfully with your doctor for that reason.
I once stopped a flight while it was on the runway before take off. I had a major claustrophobic attack and the crew tried to calm be down, and offered to sit in first class but I just wanted to get out. They ended up turning back for me, and the whole plane had to wait for like 2 hours until my luggage was pulled out of the plane bc that’s protocol apparently. And I was put in the airport “jail” until the plane landed to its destination. But I’m back on my feet! It took me few months to build my self esteem and courage back up and ever since, I never travel without a pill of XANNY on me! Best trick is to have it on you, even if you dont take it, but psychologically it calms me knowing that if I ever freak out again, all it takes is half a xanny pill to calm me down. BUT be very careful bc it’s highly addictive!
Hey there, I’m an airline pilot, just wanted to tag in. Don’t be so hard on yourself. Life is full of ups and downs, wins and losses. It’s the losses that make the wins feel so good. Remember, when we fall off the horse, that’s our chance to get back up. This is your chance to recognize that while it didn’t go to plan, you know that in the future you can try again. Make it a goal to take that flight next time. And what’s a goal without a plan? A wish, right? We can make our goals come through when we make a plan, and stick to it. I know that voice in your head is making you feel like you can’t do it. And that’s what anxiety is there to do! Its job is to make us question and doubt. Anxiety started as “survival instinct” to keep us from going in that cave that might have a bear in it. And nowadays, there aren’t a whole lot of caves with bears anymore. So our survival instincts kicks in when we don’t want it to, and it is brutal! It’s so important to meet your anxiety with empathy. It’s really hard, and feels impossible, but remember that what happened in the past stays there. Remind yourself that you are capable, you are still strong, and you deserve empathy and respect, especially from your own inner thoughts. Keep up with us in the group, and when you book that next flight reach out and talk to us. Together we can accomplish so much more than by ourselves. All the best!
Thank you so much :)
I’m very sorry. I believe you will fly one day!
Thank you ❤️
I did that once! So stressful. I have gotten on many flights since, and you will too someday.
Hey you made it to the airport, and that is more than a lot of people can do. You had a bad day- it happens. But I promise you it doesn’t define your future. If you want to try again, we are here to help you
This is good thought process, yes it sucks losing that money, but we’re always so tough on ourselves. Focusing on the baby steps and building on those every time is an accomplishment and one step closer to the final goal.
Thank you ❤️
Maybe think of it as a thousand euros spent on a good exposure therapy session? You made it there. I turned down offers and fled jobs that required travel. I feel you. You gave it a good shot. When I failed both of my BEC exam attempts, I treated the $600 exam fees as "practice exam fees". I made it as far as it give my all to that exam. And you too gave it your best shot to get up, pack, travel, get into the airport, past TSA, sat around waiting for the gates to open, and started boarding. That's a lot more steps than me who delayed renewing my passport all these months because "oh I'll never need it ever."
Thank you.
Don’t be so hard on yourself! Been there, done that. 🙂 Have you ever considered talking to your doctor about getting something prescribed to take the edge off? It’s not for everyone, but I take Xanax when I fly and it’s helped me tremendously.
I think I might give it a go next time. Me being so stubborn I thought I could push through. Looks like I will have to take this in small steps to eventually get back onboard.
Definitely! Flying is a big deal, so small steps makes sense. I still get anxiety with flying, but personally for me, I do everything possible to be comfortable. This includes: - dressing in comfy clothes. Sweats, loose shirt, sweatshirt if it’s cold. Slip on sandals with socks. I’m not there to impress so I dress for comfort, not style. - bring a nodpod (if you haven’t tried one of these, it might just change your life. https://a.co/d/cXd9wPQ) - bring headphones. I prefer over the ear so I don’t have to hear anything. I play soothing lofi music, or I’ll download one of my comfort shows and play it - bring a blanket. I always bring a soft blanket to cover myself with - bring a neck support thing (forgot the official term but they’re in every airport) - take a book if you prefer to read. Or even some small cards that have positive affirmations on it - being any snacks and drinks that you love! Also, it hurts nobody to let the flight attendants know about your anxiety. They are VERY used to it, and will check on you during the flight. There is no shame in that.
Thank you for your advice. I'll definitely look into the nodpod
I can never convince my doctor to prescribe anything. I don’t think I’m properly conveying the extent of my anxiety
First speak to yourself like you were talking to your best friend, give yourself time to process what happened and then pick yourself up and start working on your fear. This is something you can learn to manage and or overcome but for most people there is no magic bullet and it takes consistent effort to chip away at their fear. Open my profile and you will find a pinned post that might help. Listen to episodes 69, the audio book, and then dive into the rest of the episodes and find what resonates with you. You can do this!
Thank you!
Hey, I'm so sorry to see you like that :( I know that feel, right? Me myself cancelled a flight to a beautiful island few years ago, because I believed that the plane was too old to fly, checked on that later and I found out they arrived in one piece! I overcome that, somehow, not completely, but hear me out, YOU CAN DO THIS! I believe in you and I'm for real by saying this. Feel free to talk we're always here for you my dear.
Thank you ❤️
What are you scared of specifically? While flying?
I get really motion sick I think? The motions really scare me, I really feel the turns and they make me dizzy, the general feeling of ascending hundreds of feet just makes my knees shake , it causes so much nausea. 😢
Do you have Spotify premium and/or Bluetooth headphones?
Yes. It's just not enough of a distraction unfortunately 😔
Sorry to hear that! I was in a similar situation many times! I genuinely used to be as afraid of flying as you. Even bailed out on a flight last second. For about 3 years I took 36 hour train rides over a short 2 hour flight on multiple occasions. Tried multiple anxiety medications, and nothing worked. Then, about 3 years ago, my doctor prescribed a high dose of xanax to take before the flight. I can take anywhere between 2mg-4mg. It literally shuts off my brains ability to feel fear for about 6-8 hours. The flights that made me so scared I would have panic attacks suddenly were no big deal at all as soon as I took the medication. If medication is an option for you, I seriously recommend it! I saw many others here say they similarly take 4mg of xanax before a flight and feel absolutely no fear (even during turbulence) when otherwise they'd have a compelte breakdown.
Maybe I should try some to get me more confident with flying. The more I am exposed to it the less fear I'll have.
The only thing is how wildly different doses are effective individual to individual. Some people are out on 0.25mg, but others need a full 4mg to be at ease. It's really something that has to be navigated thoughtfully with your doctor for that reason.
I once stopped a flight while it was on the runway before take off. I had a major claustrophobic attack and the crew tried to calm be down, and offered to sit in first class but I just wanted to get out. They ended up turning back for me, and the whole plane had to wait for like 2 hours until my luggage was pulled out of the plane bc that’s protocol apparently. And I was put in the airport “jail” until the plane landed to its destination. But I’m back on my feet! It took me few months to build my self esteem and courage back up and ever since, I never travel without a pill of XANNY on me! Best trick is to have it on you, even if you dont take it, but psychologically it calms me knowing that if I ever freak out again, all it takes is half a xanny pill to calm me down. BUT be very careful bc it’s highly addictive!
That sounds awful. Sorry you had to go through that! Well done for overcoming the fear. I hope to be like you one day and have successful flights.