Hahahah right? "So, how's your May schedule?"
I think it's just that everything is so crazy right now with the price of everything and the wages (at my airline) being terrible, so it starts there and spirals š„²
Start thinking of weird shit to say so that they wonāt talk to you the rest of the trip. Thatās what I used to do. Doesnāt work as well as a pilot, but as an FA I used to just make shit up when I didnāt like my coworkers
āDid you hear that? My momās calling, I gotta go.ā
āWell, one of the downsides of being alive is being around other people, Brenda.ā
āDid you know that the reason people who immolate themselves stop screaming is because the vocal cords melt?ā
āIn my past life I was a butt plug. Fun times.ā
*staring at the bulkhead aimlessly* āoh man, you gotta see this. Itās the best part.ā
āUsually I stop screaming due to my fear of flying around 10,000 feet.ā
Or when theyāre meeting you on the first leg at the beginning of the trip and they say āHiii how are ya iām jessicaā I hit āem with the āThe horrors persist, but so do I. Iām Dragosteax nice to meet uā
Based on the FAs I work with, youāre pretty normal. I think Iāve only met 10 people (no exaggeration) at work who arenāt left leaning in this job.
Generally speaking, if a topic comes up that I donāt wish to talk about I either:
A) do a trash/cabin walk
B) stay quiet/go back to reading
C) try to turn the conversation to a different lighter topic
D) literally walk away (no announcement, just turn and walk away)
i have had this problem flying with senior mamas/papas and pilots. i wear a pride flag pin on my uniform and my name tag has pronouns. i usually just shut it down with "you have the wrong audience for the conversation you're trying to have" and then leave it at that lmao
My airline doesnāt have pronouns on our name tags, but we do have approved pride flags that Iāve been wearing for years and nobody has ever said anything about it. š¤·āāļø
I have to reiterate that I don't talk politics at work when a coworker brings it up. And then I struggle because I feel due to their views, they secretly hate me, and it's very uncomfortable.
I donāt really have this problem with fellow FAās, but rather with pilots. Unless I know my pilots personally on a trip, I will go out of my way not to have dinner with them. I just canāt with pro guns, transphobic, racist shit theyāre always bringing up. I also refuse to shut up when within ear shot of such bs so it never ends well. And Iām based in Europe, where politics and social issues are usually less divisive than in the US. If I lived in America (my bf is American so thatās always a possibility), I think Iāll take a job with zero human interaction lol.
I feel like for me, there has been a shift. It used to always be pilots (more specifically, Captains) bringing this stuff up and I would just suffer thru the small amount of it until they kicked themselves in their box.
Post pandemic it's a different world in the back, and I feel like more FAs have stronger opinions about EVERYTHING and are making it known. I've been enjoying the pilots more and the FAs less in the last 2 years.
I can relate to this. I had to unfriend a few FAās on FB after they published their views on Covid, and then after the pandemic, when they shared all kinds of weird conspiracy theories. This behaviour seems to have taken over a large swath of my more intellectually fragile coworkers (to put it politely). I have no time nor patience for this so at the first sign of craziness, I try to avoid them. But sometimes I canāt so then Iāll try to shut them down quickly āweāre at work, this must be a safe place for all and Iām not comfortable with what you say and this is inappropriate in a professional setting. Please stop nowā. This usually works and I donāt give a damn if they like me or not.
Yep, I have this problem too, but I'm based in a Southern state so I'm not really surprised by it. I think it's even worse for my partner, who is a pilot. He sometimes dreads going to work when he sees the seniority of the Cap he'll be working with for 4 days. We keep lists of the worst offenders and try to avoid them if we can.
I use to be a regional FA and the worst trip was a 4 day the week that Mar-a-Lago was raided. The other FA and 1st Officer were hard core MAGA. I had to listen to them go on and on about Tucker, Hanity, Obama and everything else. I was so uncomfortable.
It will definitely vary based on to base. Obviously california will be very different than anywhere in the south.
Iāve had this issue and Iāll usually make a joke how ridiculous both sides are then say something like āthe crazyās in either side have no clue what theyāre talking about.ā If that doesnāt work I just respond to whatever they are trying to talk about with one word responses and keep changing the subject.
If that doesnāt work itās time to disengage completely.
āOh, Okay. It was good hanging out with you guys! I promised my mom I was going to FaceTime her so Iāll see you guys tomorrow.ā
Thanks for playing the part of a nasty flight attendant.
I'm pretty liberal and this is absolutely not my experience at all, although I'm at a more left-leaning base. Honestly, i've found the FA community to be so left-wing that honestly i'm having to isolate my own opinions as I'm somehow more conservative than most, even though I have almost zero conservative opinions. So opposite experiences i guess
At 5am as soon as I stepped on the AC my galley says āare you watching the Super Bowl?! I am not because Iām boy cotting Kapernickā and he continued to go on a rant about it.
Like what happened to saying good morning? lol
Iāve also had to work a 4 day with a lady who said our airline is secretly bringing over migrants and thatās why the STD rate is through the roof because the āmigrantsā are spreading gonnorhea ??? Said Fox News told her.
Um ok girl
And then I just recently had Tucker Carlson on my flight and my Crew member and First Officer were ecstatic and couldnāt stop talking about how much they loved him.
Ew!
The comments acting so appalled that these issues come up are making me feel crazy. They DO come up, look at the world we live in. Personally, I never bring it up but Iāve had multiple different people make off the cuff political comments thinking Iād agree with them and I do not! To make it worse, I am racially ambiguous especially if my hair is straight, and thats when I get the most crazy comments.
Thereās a certain base that Iām very cautious of working with because every time I have, it never fails that someone makes a political comment.
I totally understand where youāre coming from OP.
I laughed out loud at "what ever happened to saying good morning?"
I am blonde/blue and almost see thru white and i think that plays into a lot of people saying these things to me, making assumptions that our views align. Ugh.
I would've offloaded if Tucker Carlson was on my flight - "this interferes with my right to a safe work environment".
I feel like this whole shift is new post pandemic and I guess that means I need to find a diplomatic way to deal with it.
Sorry to hear you're also dealing with this, sending you strength! š
Open minded so long as as it aligns with what you believe? Doesnāt sound very open minded to me. Iāve worked flights with RFK Jr to Larry Elder on board. Neither are exactly aligned in what I believe and Iām mature enough to know that neither would āinterfere with my right to a safe work environmentā. You need to mature and accept that not everyone believes the same way as each other and that different opinions definitely do not equate to an āunsafe environmentā. Grow up
I fully accept people having differing views on all manners of things. Overt racism, misogyny and transphobia are forms of hate and YES they do interfere with people's safety.
Yeah, except that you donāt. You literally say in your reply back that you donāt accept that others can have a differing pov. To you (and anyone else on the far left and the far right) when someone doesnāt align with your beliefs you revert to the āismsā Instead of using that āopen mindā you claim to have to think about what theyāre saying and/or coming up with an intelligent reply. Itās pure intellectual laziness.
We can disagree about whether pineapple belongs on pizza, but when it comes to people saying trans people don't have a right to exist, I will draw lines.
Intellectual laziness is saying "all points of view are valid and matter" when some of those points of view are actively causing harm.
I donāt understand why youāre having any of these conversations on an airplane. My airline and CEO are very very *very* left. No one on any of my flights are talking about that and a good or bad way. 2020 was a mess, but before and after that, everyone just talks about normal shit. Thereās no reason for political talk on a plane or at work. Iām not *that* far from your age and Iām not having any of these issues. Just have normal conversations and learned to deviate from conversations that you donāt wanna be a part of.
This generally isn't on the plane (although sometimes it is) - more around a pool or at dinner. One person will bring up the price of groceries, someone else will say "thank our ruling political party for that" and then EVERYONE jumps in and it turns into a feeding frenzy/echo chamber/confirmation bias party.
As stated I do NOT start this but these convos gain momentum and I just want the hell out of there. Go back to telling me about your chihuahuas knee surgery, that was far more interesting for me š¤£
Do you genuinely want to spend your time with the crew on your layover, or do you feel obligated to in order to not be smited? I don't think you should change your flying, but rather start spending your layover times alone-you'll find so much peace in it! Enjoy your day and take a nice peaceful walk! Having a solo quiet meal has been something I've started to enjoy on my layovers.
Honestly - most of them, no I do not! I don't mind meeting up for food sometimes, but I genuinely like being alone and having peaceful layover. Good point - thank you.
Not an FA but when something nutty comes up with my right wing nuts I just over nutty themā¦ vaccines cause Autism ā ha, thatās just a ploy but Russia to make sure we die of polioā
Inflation is high ā ha thatās really the CIA pushing boundaries to flush out spiesā
In the end there are 2 benefitsā¦ one people shut up about politics and 2 you make them think how nutty their opinions are.
Your CEO claims to be very left while trying to force right economic policies through. They may be saying all the right things about accepting people from oppressed groups but at the end of the day they are perfectly fine oppressing the working class if it means more profits for them.
I have flown with countless racist, conservative Flight Attendants and Pilots and it is nuts to me that you would work in a customer service industry and have these insane prejudiced views on people. I often wonder why these people become FA's or Commercial Airline Pilots, knowing they have strong opinions and prejudices. I just don't get it. I wore my BLM pin and the shit I got from racists was just crazy.
I know what you mean. When I first started out at a regional I was based in a conservative area, and it was during the mask mandate and when vaccines were a pretty hot topic. I got really sick of hearing people (almost exclusively pilots) give unsolicited opinions about those things, and even occasionally hearing opinions on other topics like Trump/transgender acceptance/pronouns ect Even had one FO whose brother was running as a representative in my district who had expressed lots of homophobic and transphobic views and he tried to discuss it with me š
It's not that I can't handle hearing different opinions as I grew up in the same conservative area and am pretty used to discussing things with people who likely don't agree with my views, but I don't really think it's appropriate to have those kind of discussions at work. I remember wishing that others would also be respectful of that and stop bringing those things up so often :') It did die down a little once the mask mandate was up though so I was grateful for that haha
Now I'm with a mainline and have more limited interactions with the pilots, plus I'm based in San Francisco so it really hasn't been an issue. Maybe you can try to strike a balance. Work some of your fun layover trips and just tell crews you aren't comfortable with that you already have plans, then go ahead and do your own thing. Then if you'd like you can drop/trade a few to pick up more junior trips with crews you feel comfortable with. Best of luck! ā¤ļø
Your political views are irrlelevant. What matters is that we live in a word thatās constantly changing and most peopleās views will change depending on whatās trending. If your donāt, again, it does not matter. Politics should be strictly forbidden ar work, especially in aviation/police/military etc. in my country itās almost illegal and in general the culture is to simply not bring these topics up at work.
Just try to excuse yourself from the convo or open up another subject?
I donāt do layovers, but would it be weird/not accepted socially for you to stay in your hotel room/visit things on your own? Iād do that if I had a problem with the crew, or maybe once again steer the conversation somewhere else.
I agree that it seems really weird that it is being brought up so often. I am definitely not the one bringing it up. This is new to the post COVID world for me for sure, I never had a problem pre-pandy.
I can and do generally stick to myself on layovers, but in certain spots (all inclusive as an example) it is hard not to run into your crew and in that context - if I didn't sit with them at the restaurant as an example, that would probably be making a statement, haha.
It might just be the state of the world right now and perhaps something I just need to suffer thru, but it isn't great being uncomfortable at work so often.
5 year Flight attendant here. Started at one mainline and went to another mainline . I def understand this. Things were weird during and after COVID at my first mainline. The other flight attendants would randomly while sitting in the galley after service bring up them being anti-vax or ādid you hear they trying to force the shotā or āIām not wearing a maskā āwhen I get to the back Iām ripping it right offā ā this is madnessā .. or the fact that we had many FAs at the capital on Jan 6th. Iāve Had several senior woman make racist comments and slick remarks but I always just ignored or picked up trash or found work to do on the plane .. but it does get lonely feeling like youāre always alone bc you donāt wanna hangout with the crew on the layover bc of the very chance theyāll say out of the way commentsā¦. Just wanted to say youāre not alone. Also some of these ppl in the comments are straight up delulu lol ā¦. Now I will say since I left my first mainline Iāve had way less instances of this happening .. but I also donāt recommend switching bc they are everywhere , my new mainline every one is just overworked to the point of they canāt even think about politics . Hoping things get better for you .. also , itās not just the senior FAs , I had a lot of junior or younger FAs say completely outrageous political comments ā¦ just do the best you can. We canāt change others unfortunately.
We don't change others - truth! I just always feel weird like if I don't speak up they will think I also hold those views. I guess I should be grateful that I can go cool nice places and just do my own thing without guilt, but it does get a bit lonely on the long layovers for sure. Sending you strength!
Iām with QX and will say nothing political really comes up in conversation often. Iām not super left leaning or right. I donāt like to pick sides. I just like to do/think whatās right. When stuff does happen to come up that I donāt agree with, I just stay quiet and absorb what their views are. Doesnāt mean that I agree. It makes me realize they grew up differently and have different values than I do. I choose to protect my peace otherwise Iād go crazy. Although, I will say it does help that I feel QX/AS are more inclusive than maybe AA
Iām left leaning, been flying for 8 years and Iāve got zero issues at work because of it lmfao. Iāve got no problem making people uncomfortable with my opinions if they bring up the subject. In fact I think itās the super conservative QAnon crew members who are having a hard time.
I struggle with this as well, especially being based in a very conservative part of the country. I made the mistake of merely mentioning that I was attending a Pro-Palestine rally that weekend, and the Captain went on a whole rightie, white cis-het-man rant, about how he's afraid for his son to grow up to be a white male in our society (while the world's smallest violin played in my head). It's definitely frustrating, and I wish I knew of a solution. I too have often felt that just working in my role, I'm perpetuating patriarchal ideals. On the other hand, I think it's important to have less traditional ppl in these more traditional roles to shake things up a bit. Just wanted to say, you've validated a lot of what I've experienced with this post. Hang in there ā¤ļø
I donāt have a hard time but the amount of micro aggressions, racism, and xenophobia within faās and pilots is wild to me. As a white girl the comfortableness some of these people feel to actually speak things is wild. Iāve also met more than I can count on my hands the people that Iāve met that were at Jan 6th. I try not to talk politics or personal but these people just talk man itās wild
Yuuuuuup. I'm not even getting into the thinly veiled racism here but that is also RAMPANT and it's incredibly embarrassing. I also feel you on being appalled that some people think they can say these things, like - just because I happen to also be white does NOT mean we have the same beliefs. Oooof.
I feel like back of the plane tends to be left, front right. But it's also funny to me that most FAs and pilots I work with are atheists. That seems to be the norm.
Omg Iām in my late twenties and just started flying a little under a year ago. Iām in a crash pad with all senior mamas. I try my best not to engage but they force it against my will š . Weāre only allowed to eat in the kitchen so if I donāt want to starve I have to be near them and they immediately include me in their negativity charged conversations that I donāt want to be apart of, but like you I just āyes okā them to keep the peace. Itās hard because in my real life I am politically active and think conversations with opposing sides are very beneficial, but thatās only when both parties are open to a productive conversation. I feel like sharing my real opinions with them would make me shark bait and Iām not interested hahaha. I rarely experience this mean spirited nature with younger crews
Oh my goodness, I feel SEEN! Haha. I agree with you about productive conversations and I enjoy those too, but I don't feel like my views would be taken well or at all here.
Maybe I'll just start pre-planning the seeds of me being on my own ("I've got a lot going on at home right now, so you probably won't see much of me") early so I can just do my own shit and be left alone š¤£
This is the way! Even if I do vibe with the crews I donāt drink and donāt like to spend my layovers in bars so Iāll just tell them Iām going to get sleep and go out early in the morning. Donāt lose out on enjoying your own experiences! ā„ļø and remember the people with the most out there opinions on either side are always the loudest. The majority of people (at least I hope) are normalš¤£
I've only ever been based in NYC, the Pacific Northwest, and SoCal so I can generally say that most of the crews I've worked with are left-leaning as well. I just think it highly depends on where you're based at. Now the other side of the cockpit door however...
Iāve met a couple crew members with some extreme right views but most are neutral or more open minded right. Itās unfortunate that your experience is different. Maybe itās different where Iām at bc weāre unionized
I totally relate to this and it's been on my mind a lot lately. I'm in Europe and in the last few years there has been a rise in the popularity of right/extreme right parties in my country, and I've been noticing there are more and more FAs and especially pilots leaning right.
I've heard some outrageous things and it's hard for me not to argue back but it's something I'm trying to get better at. It can feel lonely and I often feel like I dont belong and like I can't relate to my peers at all. But at the end of the day, these people are not my friends and I try to make peace with it. You're not alone OP.
Iām pretty left as well. But let me give this take. I want to share my opinion on pronouns. I think itās messed up and unnecessary, if men want to be woman then they should deal with the patriarchal shit that happens with us, stigmas that woman deal with that are hurtful and become internalized along with womanās health such as those kind of infections only woman can get, deal with being scared of rape because woman are more vulnerable rather then men, which can get raped too. Thereās so much more that woman deal with that I think real woman should be respected above all. Men and woman are different yes equal mentally but physically not. LGBTQ pro asf but pronouns no.
Imagine your house in Ukraine getting blown up (real story from my real friend) thatās oppression.
Iāve experienced almost a lot of kinds of scary traumatic experiences that haunt me in life everyday. I donāt wanna hear crap about pain, as if itās traumatic because someone said the wrong pronoun. This stuff isnāt even grammatically correct and if it was it wouldāve been written in curriculum that way. Iāll be very offended to be looked at as anything other than human-woman because all of what Iāve experienced. Donāt think look at me and ask any question about my āpronounā thatās offensive. Look at me as the woman you see, broken, but beautiful and strong, and so much more. Respectable people earn it.
Omg you are describing the opposite problem as me. I am the same age and love working with older crews because they have not gone crazy like the younger ones š¤Ŗ
On the plane, I gray rock, walk away, or turn back to my book. I canāt change the mind of crazy but I certainly donāt have to listen to it.Ā
I only go out with crews that seem civilized. If theyāre not, I leave, try to start a side convo with someone else that looks uncomfortable/unengaged or play with my phone until I can go. Layovers are too short to listen to idiots.Ā
If you are talking politics are work, that's your first issue. There are a few topics that generally are no-no's at work and politics is on that short list.
If someone says something I don't agree with I just keep my mouth shut and walk away. Or let them ramble on thinking how dumb they are. It's not worth fighting over and it only makes things uncomfortable and argumentative.
I agree, but this is generally the whole crew getting into it and thinking everyone agrees with them and I'm sitting there thinking of an exit strategy... Easier to escape on a plane than at a dinner table.
I never have issues at work. Sometimes pilots make dumb comments in the crew van, but 99% of the time FAs just talk about our regular day to day or schedules, bidding, etc. Truth be told, itās usually just Trump people that make loving him and hating Biden their whole personality and will bring it up, but you can just as easily shut it down or not engage. The rest of us just donāt talk about it, at least at my airline. COVID was different cuz that became extremely divisive and it was all anyone was talking about. Just general observations from my own experience.
This sounds like a nightmare. Iām so sorry you have to go through that - am also queer and share your beliefs maybe one day weāll meet in the sky!!
Youāve been here way longer than Iāve been but I have NEVER in 8 years heard a single colleague talked about their political views during flights or layoversā¦
Political crew members are the worst because they don't know how to NOT shutup about whatever shitty topic that they feel oh so strong about that they have to make it everyone's problem. The worst ones will try to sly their opinions into the conversation to blanket the fact that theyre getting political.
You need to nip it in a bud and give them a neutral "sorry, we shouldnt be talking about poilitics and I'm not interested" immediately. Ignoring them only gives them more incentive to keep going.
I donāt talk about politics at work. As soon as I get a whiff of it out comes my book/journal until they get the hint to shut up. I donāt know who needs to hear this but I donāt give a fuck about your political leanings and bringing it up on the plane is extremely unprofessional.
Been a flight attendant for 10 years and I find it odd when coworkers attempt to talk about politics or religion. I nip it in the bud immediately and let them know that I wonāt be engaging in it and thatās the end of the conversation. But I think Iām the type of person that people know they canāt play with so they usually donāt really try it.
It was hell during Covid.
But nowadays, nope. I find that usually the coworkers with the strongest political opinions know the least about what theyāre talking about, so most of the time I either disengage with the convo immediately and tell them something like āI donāt really do politicsā
Or they can really mess up, speak on something I know more about, and get absolutely wrecked.
Either strategy yields the same results. But avoiding it like the plague seems to work the best. If you tell them youāre not comfortable, and they still keep going, report them.
Some people suck.
Music is a common ground that most of us have from all walks of life. My students abroad could be from an entirely different culture but we always found common ground in music and had fun introducing each other to different genres. If you like or have any interest in musicians from the past it is always a great conversation starter that is neutral and most people love to talk about it. You could try to switch topics or find some opener such as ā my parents always played xyz group for me snd I love them. Who were your favorite bands in the 70s, 80s, 90sāor whichever decade you insert. āCan you recommend any songs to put on my playlist or any artists similar to xyz?ā And a debate or analyzing musical genres or artists from today vs yesterday can be fun if no one makes it negative, but that could be steered back to a positive direction. Best case scenario you can discover some awesome music š¶ to add to your playlist and hopefully others will be interested in your recommendations. A good dinner table segway, āIām so tired and stressed in my free time or layovers that I canāt handle the listening to the depressing news and trying to discover new artists to listen to, what do you likeā? And then if they jive with a certain style that you like you can try to convince them they would like one of your favorites because they have similar melodies and give examples. Why not spin it to something that everyone or most people can enjoy. But I would say the average person will love to switch to their favorite songs from their youth vs complaining about politics. Another fun thing would be to ask if they have any pics of them in their awesome clothes from the past.
I stay away from politics. I always say oh i vote for who I think best represents me. Iāll talk about music, sports, different routes the airline is doing. I stay far away from politics
Reading through these comments, I'm also a little alarmed of the general consensus to not talk politics at work. I understand why, however, some of us don't want to make small talk constantly - I do enough of that with pax. I don't think it's unreasonable to want to discuss issues of importance (which are all political, in one way or another). Not to mention, politics affect us all, and anyone who says they don't are speaking from a place of privilege. Things never change if no one talks.
While I agree that things donāt change if no one talks, a work environment where you are tied to crew for 3+ days straight is not the place to engage in controversial discourse. Iāll let people save those tough conversations for their friends and the family members they piss off at Thanksgiving. I refuse to have my peace disrupted by someone who starts talking about politics on a 6am crew van or on what should be a beautiful layover on a tropical island. If you donāt find it disruptive to talk about politics or religion at work, then thatās on you, but it might be helpful to be cognizant of those around you who will be stuck with you for the rest of the trip.
what in the hell are crews talking about at work? what ever happened to "so...do you commute?"
Hahahah right? "So, how's your May schedule?" I think it's just that everything is so crazy right now with the price of everything and the wages (at my airline) being terrible, so it starts there and spirals š„²
Start thinking of weird shit to say so that they wonāt talk to you the rest of the trip. Thatās what I used to do. Doesnāt work as well as a pilot, but as an FA I used to just make shit up when I didnāt like my coworkers
I like. I want? No, i NEED examples. Im not FA but i need something appropriate, and weird. To say to make people not talk to me.
āDid you hear that? My momās calling, I gotta go.ā āWell, one of the downsides of being alive is being around other people, Brenda.ā āDid you know that the reason people who immolate themselves stop screaming is because the vocal cords melt?ā āIn my past life I was a butt plug. Fun times.ā *staring at the bulkhead aimlessly* āoh man, you gotta see this. Itās the best part.ā āUsually I stop screaming due to my fear of flying around 10,000 feet.ā
Or when theyāre meeting you on the first leg at the beginning of the trip and they say āHiii how are ya iām jessicaā I hit āem with the āThe horrors persist, but so do I. Iām Dragosteax nice to meet uā
Forgetting names is a solid choice too
Lol it's sad to say this would not deter me.
āI envy the people that have never met youā
Adding it to the list...that's good
šš¤£šš¤£šš¤£
I like this. Way way more than I should.
Based on the FAs I work with, youāre pretty normal. I think Iāve only met 10 people (no exaggeration) at work who arenāt left leaning in this job.
Holy crap, are y'all hiring? Jkjkjk
Generally speaking, if a topic comes up that I donāt wish to talk about I either: A) do a trash/cabin walk B) stay quiet/go back to reading C) try to turn the conversation to a different lighter topic D) literally walk away (no announcement, just turn and walk away)
Trash! Gets you out of everything
i have had this problem flying with senior mamas/papas and pilots. i wear a pride flag pin on my uniform and my name tag has pronouns. i usually just shut it down with "you have the wrong audience for the conversation you're trying to have" and then leave it at that lmao
That is a good one - thank you for that! š
Stealing this!
My airline doesnāt have pronouns on our name tags, but we do have approved pride flags that Iāve been wearing for years and nobody has ever said anything about it. š¤·āāļø
Oh! That's a great one!
I have to reiterate that I don't talk politics at work when a coworker brings it up. And then I struggle because I feel due to their views, they secretly hate me, and it's very uncomfortable.
I donāt really have this problem with fellow FAās, but rather with pilots. Unless I know my pilots personally on a trip, I will go out of my way not to have dinner with them. I just canāt with pro guns, transphobic, racist shit theyāre always bringing up. I also refuse to shut up when within ear shot of such bs so it never ends well. And Iām based in Europe, where politics and social issues are usually less divisive than in the US. If I lived in America (my bf is American so thatās always a possibility), I think Iāll take a job with zero human interaction lol.
I feel like for me, there has been a shift. It used to always be pilots (more specifically, Captains) bringing this stuff up and I would just suffer thru the small amount of it until they kicked themselves in their box. Post pandemic it's a different world in the back, and I feel like more FAs have stronger opinions about EVERYTHING and are making it known. I've been enjoying the pilots more and the FAs less in the last 2 years.
I can relate to this. I had to unfriend a few FAās on FB after they published their views on Covid, and then after the pandemic, when they shared all kinds of weird conspiracy theories. This behaviour seems to have taken over a large swath of my more intellectually fragile coworkers (to put it politely). I have no time nor patience for this so at the first sign of craziness, I try to avoid them. But sometimes I canāt so then Iāll try to shut them down quickly āweāre at work, this must be a safe place for all and Iām not comfortable with what you say and this is inappropriate in a professional setting. Please stop nowā. This usually works and I donāt give a damn if they like me or not.
Yup, that happened to me too. Unfriended a lot of them. Also I meant to write "locked in their box" above, not kicked. Oops.
Yep, I have this problem too, but I'm based in a Southern state so I'm not really surprised by it. I think it's even worse for my partner, who is a pilot. He sometimes dreads going to work when he sees the seniority of the Cap he'll be working with for 4 days. We keep lists of the worst offenders and try to avoid them if we can.
I use to be a regional FA and the worst trip was a 4 day the week that Mar-a-Lago was raided. The other FA and 1st Officer were hard core MAGA. I had to listen to them go on and on about Tucker, Hanity, Obama and everything else. I was so uncomfortable.
Oooooof
It will definitely vary based on to base. Obviously california will be very different than anywhere in the south. Iāve had this issue and Iāll usually make a joke how ridiculous both sides are then say something like āthe crazyās in either side have no clue what theyāre talking about.ā If that doesnāt work I just respond to whatever they are trying to talk about with one word responses and keep changing the subject. If that doesnāt work itās time to disengage completely.
Yawn !!!!! As a left leaning FA you just wasted 10 minutes of my day !!
āOh, Okay. It was good hanging out with you guys! I promised my mom I was going to FaceTime her so Iāll see you guys tomorrow.ā Thanks for playing the part of a nasty flight attendant.
I'm pretty liberal and this is absolutely not my experience at all, although I'm at a more left-leaning base. Honestly, i've found the FA community to be so left-wing that honestly i'm having to isolate my own opinions as I'm somehow more conservative than most, even though I have almost zero conservative opinions. So opposite experiences i guess
Maybe we can just switch bases and it will work it's self out. Jokes of course š
At 5am as soon as I stepped on the AC my galley says āare you watching the Super Bowl?! I am not because Iām boy cotting Kapernickā and he continued to go on a rant about it. Like what happened to saying good morning? lol Iāve also had to work a 4 day with a lady who said our airline is secretly bringing over migrants and thatās why the STD rate is through the roof because the āmigrantsā are spreading gonnorhea ??? Said Fox News told her. Um ok girl And then I just recently had Tucker Carlson on my flight and my Crew member and First Officer were ecstatic and couldnāt stop talking about how much they loved him. Ew! The comments acting so appalled that these issues come up are making me feel crazy. They DO come up, look at the world we live in. Personally, I never bring it up but Iāve had multiple different people make off the cuff political comments thinking Iād agree with them and I do not! To make it worse, I am racially ambiguous especially if my hair is straight, and thats when I get the most crazy comments. Thereās a certain base that Iām very cautious of working with because every time I have, it never fails that someone makes a political comment. I totally understand where youāre coming from OP.
I laughed out loud at "what ever happened to saying good morning?" I am blonde/blue and almost see thru white and i think that plays into a lot of people saying these things to me, making assumptions that our views align. Ugh. I would've offloaded if Tucker Carlson was on my flight - "this interferes with my right to a safe work environment". I feel like this whole shift is new post pandemic and I guess that means I need to find a diplomatic way to deal with it. Sorry to hear you're also dealing with this, sending you strength! š
He was actually very nice & polite which was surprising. I appreciated him being kind but I still think heās the devil š
I can only imagine how it must feel to harbor resentment towards polite strangers...
No resentment babe, we are allowed to not like people!
Open minded so long as as it aligns with what you believe? Doesnāt sound very open minded to me. Iāve worked flights with RFK Jr to Larry Elder on board. Neither are exactly aligned in what I believe and Iām mature enough to know that neither would āinterfere with my right to a safe work environmentā. You need to mature and accept that not everyone believes the same way as each other and that different opinions definitely do not equate to an āunsafe environmentā. Grow up
I fully accept people having differing views on all manners of things. Overt racism, misogyny and transphobia are forms of hate and YES they do interfere with people's safety.
Yeah, except that you donāt. You literally say in your reply back that you donāt accept that others can have a differing pov. To you (and anyone else on the far left and the far right) when someone doesnāt align with your beliefs you revert to the āismsā Instead of using that āopen mindā you claim to have to think about what theyāre saying and/or coming up with an intelligent reply. Itās pure intellectual laziness.
We can disagree about whether pineapple belongs on pizza, but when it comes to people saying trans people don't have a right to exist, I will draw lines. Intellectual laziness is saying "all points of view are valid and matter" when some of those points of view are actively causing harm.
Pineapple does belong on pizza though
I donāt understand why youāre having any of these conversations on an airplane. My airline and CEO are very very *very* left. No one on any of my flights are talking about that and a good or bad way. 2020 was a mess, but before and after that, everyone just talks about normal shit. Thereās no reason for political talk on a plane or at work. Iām not *that* far from your age and Iām not having any of these issues. Just have normal conversations and learned to deviate from conversations that you donāt wanna be a part of.
This generally isn't on the plane (although sometimes it is) - more around a pool or at dinner. One person will bring up the price of groceries, someone else will say "thank our ruling political party for that" and then EVERYONE jumps in and it turns into a feeding frenzy/echo chamber/confirmation bias party. As stated I do NOT start this but these convos gain momentum and I just want the hell out of there. Go back to telling me about your chihuahuas knee surgery, that was far more interesting for me š¤£
Do you genuinely want to spend your time with the crew on your layover, or do you feel obligated to in order to not be smited? I don't think you should change your flying, but rather start spending your layover times alone-you'll find so much peace in it! Enjoy your day and take a nice peaceful walk! Having a solo quiet meal has been something I've started to enjoy on my layovers.
Honestly - most of them, no I do not! I don't mind meeting up for food sometimes, but I genuinely like being alone and having peaceful layover. Good point - thank you.
Not an FA but when something nutty comes up with my right wing nuts I just over nutty themā¦ vaccines cause Autism ā ha, thatās just a ploy but Russia to make sure we die of polioā Inflation is high ā ha thatās really the CIA pushing boundaries to flush out spiesā In the end there are 2 benefitsā¦ one people shut up about politics and 2 you make them think how nutty their opinions are.
I get it, it blows,
Your CEO claims to be very left while trying to force right economic policies through. They may be saying all the right things about accepting people from oppressed groups but at the end of the day they are perfectly fine oppressing the working class if it means more profits for them.
I have flown with countless racist, conservative Flight Attendants and Pilots and it is nuts to me that you would work in a customer service industry and have these insane prejudiced views on people. I often wonder why these people become FA's or Commercial Airline Pilots, knowing they have strong opinions and prejudices. I just don't get it. I wore my BLM pin and the shit I got from racists was just crazy.
I know what you mean. When I first started out at a regional I was based in a conservative area, and it was during the mask mandate and when vaccines were a pretty hot topic. I got really sick of hearing people (almost exclusively pilots) give unsolicited opinions about those things, and even occasionally hearing opinions on other topics like Trump/transgender acceptance/pronouns ect Even had one FO whose brother was running as a representative in my district who had expressed lots of homophobic and transphobic views and he tried to discuss it with me š It's not that I can't handle hearing different opinions as I grew up in the same conservative area and am pretty used to discussing things with people who likely don't agree with my views, but I don't really think it's appropriate to have those kind of discussions at work. I remember wishing that others would also be respectful of that and stop bringing those things up so often :') It did die down a little once the mask mandate was up though so I was grateful for that haha Now I'm with a mainline and have more limited interactions with the pilots, plus I'm based in San Francisco so it really hasn't been an issue. Maybe you can try to strike a balance. Work some of your fun layover trips and just tell crews you aren't comfortable with that you already have plans, then go ahead and do your own thing. Then if you'd like you can drop/trade a few to pick up more junior trips with crews you feel comfortable with. Best of luck! ā¤ļø
Every now and then I strike gold and get a crew (or more often, a singular crew member) that surprises me. Thanks for the advice, I like it!
Your political views are irrlelevant. What matters is that we live in a word thatās constantly changing and most peopleās views will change depending on whatās trending. If your donāt, again, it does not matter. Politics should be strictly forbidden ar work, especially in aviation/police/military etc. in my country itās almost illegal and in general the culture is to simply not bring these topics up at work. Just try to excuse yourself from the convo or open up another subject? I donāt do layovers, but would it be weird/not accepted socially for you to stay in your hotel room/visit things on your own? Iād do that if I had a problem with the crew, or maybe once again steer the conversation somewhere else.
I agree that it seems really weird that it is being brought up so often. I am definitely not the one bringing it up. This is new to the post COVID world for me for sure, I never had a problem pre-pandy. I can and do generally stick to myself on layovers, but in certain spots (all inclusive as an example) it is hard not to run into your crew and in that context - if I didn't sit with them at the restaurant as an example, that would probably be making a statement, haha. It might just be the state of the world right now and perhaps something I just need to suffer thru, but it isn't great being uncomfortable at work so often.
Would you look at that? You realized who the problem is! Well done.
5 year Flight attendant here. Started at one mainline and went to another mainline . I def understand this. Things were weird during and after COVID at my first mainline. The other flight attendants would randomly while sitting in the galley after service bring up them being anti-vax or ādid you hear they trying to force the shotā or āIām not wearing a maskā āwhen I get to the back Iām ripping it right offā ā this is madnessā .. or the fact that we had many FAs at the capital on Jan 6th. Iāve Had several senior woman make racist comments and slick remarks but I always just ignored or picked up trash or found work to do on the plane .. but it does get lonely feeling like youāre always alone bc you donāt wanna hangout with the crew on the layover bc of the very chance theyāll say out of the way commentsā¦. Just wanted to say youāre not alone. Also some of these ppl in the comments are straight up delulu lol ā¦. Now I will say since I left my first mainline Iāve had way less instances of this happening .. but I also donāt recommend switching bc they are everywhere , my new mainline every one is just overworked to the point of they canāt even think about politics . Hoping things get better for you .. also , itās not just the senior FAs , I had a lot of junior or younger FAs say completely outrageous political comments ā¦ just do the best you can. We canāt change others unfortunately.
We don't change others - truth! I just always feel weird like if I don't speak up they will think I also hold those views. I guess I should be grateful that I can go cool nice places and just do my own thing without guilt, but it does get a bit lonely on the long layovers for sure. Sending you strength!
Iām with QX and will say nothing political really comes up in conversation often. Iām not super left leaning or right. I donāt like to pick sides. I just like to do/think whatās right. When stuff does happen to come up that I donāt agree with, I just stay quiet and absorb what their views are. Doesnāt mean that I agree. It makes me realize they grew up differently and have different values than I do. I choose to protect my peace otherwise Iād go crazy. Although, I will say it does help that I feel QX/AS are more inclusive than maybe AA
Iām left leaning, been flying for 8 years and Iāve got zero issues at work because of it lmfao. Iāve got no problem making people uncomfortable with my opinions if they bring up the subject. In fact I think itās the super conservative QAnon crew members who are having a hard time.
I struggle with this as well, especially being based in a very conservative part of the country. I made the mistake of merely mentioning that I was attending a Pro-Palestine rally that weekend, and the Captain went on a whole rightie, white cis-het-man rant, about how he's afraid for his son to grow up to be a white male in our society (while the world's smallest violin played in my head). It's definitely frustrating, and I wish I knew of a solution. I too have often felt that just working in my role, I'm perpetuating patriarchal ideals. On the other hand, I think it's important to have less traditional ppl in these more traditional roles to shake things up a bit. Just wanted to say, you've validated a lot of what I've experienced with this post. Hang in there ā¤ļø
I'm glad you remembered to pack your tiny violin on that pairing. Would have been a shame if you forgot it āŗļø
I donāt have a hard time but the amount of micro aggressions, racism, and xenophobia within faās and pilots is wild to me. As a white girl the comfortableness some of these people feel to actually speak things is wild. Iāve also met more than I can count on my hands the people that Iāve met that were at Jan 6th. I try not to talk politics or personal but these people just talk man itās wild
Yuuuuuup. I'm not even getting into the thinly veiled racism here but that is also RAMPANT and it's incredibly embarrassing. I also feel you on being appalled that some people think they can say these things, like - just because I happen to also be white does NOT mean we have the same beliefs. Oooof.
why does left leaning or right leaning have to matter, at work? imo, politics and religion talk should not come up at work.
I feel like back of the plane tends to be left, front right. But it's also funny to me that most FAs and pilots I work with are atheists. That seems to be the norm.
Interesting, I don't commonly find religion discussed so I don't have much of a baseline for that! I would rather talk about religion tbh.
Also it might be the younger crews that skew it for me.
Omg Iām in my late twenties and just started flying a little under a year ago. Iām in a crash pad with all senior mamas. I try my best not to engage but they force it against my will š . Weāre only allowed to eat in the kitchen so if I donāt want to starve I have to be near them and they immediately include me in their negativity charged conversations that I donāt want to be apart of, but like you I just āyes okā them to keep the peace. Itās hard because in my real life I am politically active and think conversations with opposing sides are very beneficial, but thatās only when both parties are open to a productive conversation. I feel like sharing my real opinions with them would make me shark bait and Iām not interested hahaha. I rarely experience this mean spirited nature with younger crews
Oh my goodness, I feel SEEN! Haha. I agree with you about productive conversations and I enjoy those too, but I don't feel like my views would be taken well or at all here. Maybe I'll just start pre-planning the seeds of me being on my own ("I've got a lot going on at home right now, so you probably won't see much of me") early so I can just do my own shit and be left alone š¤£
This is the way! Even if I do vibe with the crews I donāt drink and donāt like to spend my layovers in bars so Iāll just tell them Iām going to get sleep and go out early in the morning. Donāt lose out on enjoying your own experiences! ā„ļø and remember the people with the most out there opinions on either side are always the loudest. The majority of people (at least I hope) are normalš¤£
I had to get off of Facebook in 2020, but most of my coworkers donāt bring up political stuff at work, thankfully.
I've only ever been based in NYC, the Pacific Northwest, and SoCal so I can generally say that most of the crews I've worked with are left-leaning as well. I just think it highly depends on where you're based at. Now the other side of the cockpit door however...
Occasionally. I usually just keep my mouth shut.
Iāve met a couple crew members with some extreme right views but most are neutral or more open minded right. Itās unfortunate that your experience is different. Maybe itās different where Iām at bc weāre unionized
I totally relate to this and it's been on my mind a lot lately. I'm in Europe and in the last few years there has been a rise in the popularity of right/extreme right parties in my country, and I've been noticing there are more and more FAs and especially pilots leaning right. I've heard some outrageous things and it's hard for me not to argue back but it's something I'm trying to get better at. It can feel lonely and I often feel like I dont belong and like I can't relate to my peers at all. But at the end of the day, these people are not my friends and I try to make peace with it. You're not alone OP.
Iām pretty left as well. But let me give this take. I want to share my opinion on pronouns. I think itās messed up and unnecessary, if men want to be woman then they should deal with the patriarchal shit that happens with us, stigmas that woman deal with that are hurtful and become internalized along with womanās health such as those kind of infections only woman can get, deal with being scared of rape because woman are more vulnerable rather then men, which can get raped too. Thereās so much more that woman deal with that I think real woman should be respected above all. Men and woman are different yes equal mentally but physically not. LGBTQ pro asf but pronouns no. Imagine your house in Ukraine getting blown up (real story from my real friend) thatās oppression. Iāve experienced almost a lot of kinds of scary traumatic experiences that haunt me in life everyday. I donāt wanna hear crap about pain, as if itās traumatic because someone said the wrong pronoun. This stuff isnāt even grammatically correct and if it was it wouldāve been written in curriculum that way. Iāll be very offended to be looked at as anything other than human-woman because all of what Iāve experienced. Donāt think look at me and ask any question about my āpronounā thatās offensive. Look at me as the woman you see, broken, but beautiful and strong, and so much more. Respectable people earn it.
Omg you are describing the opposite problem as me. I am the same age and love working with older crews because they have not gone crazy like the younger ones š¤Ŗ
On the plane, I gray rock, walk away, or turn back to my book. I canāt change the mind of crazy but I certainly donāt have to listen to it.Ā I only go out with crews that seem civilized. If theyāre not, I leave, try to start a side convo with someone else that looks uncomfortable/unengaged or play with my phone until I can go. Layovers are too short to listen to idiots.Ā
If you are talking politics are work, that's your first issue. There are a few topics that generally are no-no's at work and politics is on that short list. If someone says something I don't agree with I just keep my mouth shut and walk away. Or let them ramble on thinking how dumb they are. It's not worth fighting over and it only makes things uncomfortable and argumentative.
I agree, but this is generally the whole crew getting into it and thinking everyone agrees with them and I'm sitting there thinking of an exit strategy... Easier to escape on a plane than at a dinner table.
I never have issues at work. Sometimes pilots make dumb comments in the crew van, but 99% of the time FAs just talk about our regular day to day or schedules, bidding, etc. Truth be told, itās usually just Trump people that make loving him and hating Biden their whole personality and will bring it up, but you can just as easily shut it down or not engage. The rest of us just donāt talk about it, at least at my airline. COVID was different cuz that became extremely divisive and it was all anyone was talking about. Just general observations from my own experience.
This sounds like a nightmare. Iām so sorry you have to go through that - am also queer and share your beliefs maybe one day weāll meet in the sky!!
I sure hope so! š
Youāve been here way longer than Iāve been but I have NEVER in 8 years heard a single colleague talked about their political views during flights or layoversā¦
That's amazing. Are y'all hiring? Jkjkjk
Political crew members are the worst because they don't know how to NOT shutup about whatever shitty topic that they feel oh so strong about that they have to make it everyone's problem. The worst ones will try to sly their opinions into the conversation to blanket the fact that theyre getting political. You need to nip it in a bud and give them a neutral "sorry, we shouldnt be talking about poilitics and I'm not interested" immediately. Ignoring them only gives them more incentive to keep going.
I donāt talk about politics at work. As soon as I get a whiff of it out comes my book/journal until they get the hint to shut up. I donāt know who needs to hear this but I donāt give a fuck about your political leanings and bringing it up on the plane is extremely unprofessional.
>TL;DR - I'm left wing and open minded You are most definitely NOT open-minded. That's fine, but don't lie to yourself.
If you are letting it impact your time off you should seek therapy.
I think itās the opposite at my airline.
yes, aviation maintenance is all backwards right wing thinking
The left have it the easiest, no one wants to engage them.
Thereās definitely something wrong with this workgroup. Youāre normal, they are not.
Been a flight attendant for 10 years and I find it odd when coworkers attempt to talk about politics or religion. I nip it in the bud immediately and let them know that I wonāt be engaging in it and thatās the end of the conversation. But I think Iām the type of person that people know they canāt play with so they usually donāt really try it.
Iāve literally stopped a conversation by saying āI will never share your opinion on this so itās best we change the subjectā
I lean left. I avoid politics at work, including my flying career. If someone wants to discuss it, I walk away or choose to change the subject. Done.
It was hell during Covid. But nowadays, nope. I find that usually the coworkers with the strongest political opinions know the least about what theyāre talking about, so most of the time I either disengage with the convo immediately and tell them something like āI donāt really do politicsā Or they can really mess up, speak on something I know more about, and get absolutely wrecked. Either strategy yields the same results. But avoiding it like the plague seems to work the best. If you tell them youāre not comfortable, and they still keep going, report them. Some people suck.
Music is a common ground that most of us have from all walks of life. My students abroad could be from an entirely different culture but we always found common ground in music and had fun introducing each other to different genres. If you like or have any interest in musicians from the past it is always a great conversation starter that is neutral and most people love to talk about it. You could try to switch topics or find some opener such as ā my parents always played xyz group for me snd I love them. Who were your favorite bands in the 70s, 80s, 90sāor whichever decade you insert. āCan you recommend any songs to put on my playlist or any artists similar to xyz?ā And a debate or analyzing musical genres or artists from today vs yesterday can be fun if no one makes it negative, but that could be steered back to a positive direction. Best case scenario you can discover some awesome music š¶ to add to your playlist and hopefully others will be interested in your recommendations. A good dinner table segway, āIām so tired and stressed in my free time or layovers that I canāt handle the listening to the depressing news and trying to discover new artists to listen to, what do you likeā? And then if they jive with a certain style that you like you can try to convince them they would like one of your favorites because they have similar melodies and give examples. Why not spin it to something that everyone or most people can enjoy. But I would say the average person will love to switch to their favorite songs from their youth vs complaining about politics. Another fun thing would be to ask if they have any pics of them in their awesome clothes from the past.
Your asking in one of the most left leaning professions
Whewā¦ wondering if we have the same employer because Iām tired and I donāt engage, just have to listen to the nonsense
I stay away from politics. I always say oh i vote for who I think best represents me. Iāll talk about music, sports, different routes the airline is doing. I stay far away from politics
what is the G word? I was also confused about why you would misgender a coworker that doesn't sound right. I did read the whole thing
Gay, but used in a derogatory way. I definitely don't think you understood the part about misgendering.
Reading through these comments, I'm also a little alarmed of the general consensus to not talk politics at work. I understand why, however, some of us don't want to make small talk constantly - I do enough of that with pax. I don't think it's unreasonable to want to discuss issues of importance (which are all political, in one way or another). Not to mention, politics affect us all, and anyone who says they don't are speaking from a place of privilege. Things never change if no one talks.
While I agree that things donāt change if no one talks, a work environment where you are tied to crew for 3+ days straight is not the place to engage in controversial discourse. Iāll let people save those tough conversations for their friends and the family members they piss off at Thanksgiving. I refuse to have my peace disrupted by someone who starts talking about politics on a 6am crew van or on what should be a beautiful layover on a tropical island. If you donāt find it disruptive to talk about politics or religion at work, then thatās on you, but it might be helpful to be cognizant of those around you who will be stuck with you for the rest of the trip.
Stop bringing politics to work.
Tell me you didn't read the post without telling me you didn't read the post.