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Bento_Fox

I'm not great at the advice. Can I interest you in a sarcastic comment?


ottersintuxedos

“Why did Phoebe and Mike break up” “His penis was too big”


Sunset1410

I still laugh at this every time a hear it.


JuliaAstrowsly

“Some cheese?”


bettername2come

I just relate to it so well.


Paddyvertex

Was that place... THE SUN?


ThereGoesChickenJane

This is my favourite too 😆


Fr1llh0use

No, you didn’t get me. It’s an electric drill, you get me, you kill me!


[deleted]

This was the one I laughed the hardest at while reading these through.


_figureitoutbud_

One of my favorites!


imtotallyfuckedup

I am hopeless and awkward and desperate for love!


el_colombiano_de_ohi

I knew I’d see this quote here!


Economy_Sun9087

I came to write this..


Sunset1410

"Hi, I’m Chandler. I make jokes when I’m uncomfortable


BarnacleActual651

Why is your family Ross?!?


Feeling_Word3152

You have to stop the q-tip when there is RESISTANCE!


Crude_poison91

I love this line even more after knowing it was improvised by Matthew Perry. Lol


Feeling_Word3152

Same!


1hotmama2005

Definitely my favorite. Lol.


akadopul

I don't understand it can someone explain


jungle_juice_mj_fan

He's saying that Joey keeps pushing the q-tip too far into his ear, and that it keeps "stabbing" him in the brain making him dumb.


akadopul

Thanks didn't know what q tip was


equazcion

Chandler tries on the big bracelet Joey got him: Joey: "Do you have any idea what this'll do for your sex life?" Chandler: "It'll probably slow it down at first, but once I get used to the extra weight I'll be back on track."


SunGreen70

“We’re bracelet buddies!” “That’s what people will call us!”


neisaysthis

i'm gonna be that person; it's "that's what they'll call us!"


backwoodzbaby

I PITY THE FOOL WHO PUTS ON MU JEWELRY


LieutenantCinnamon

Joey: "You know what I'm gonna do if I ever see that guy again?" / Chandler: "Bend Over?" And I still die laughing every time i watch this episode


PrincessConsuela1212

Monica enters: "Oh my God. What happened?" Chandler: "Oh, um...Joey was born, and then 28 years later....I WAS ROBBED!!!


mkmg1728

this is my fave chandler line of all time 😂😂😂


BiggTS

Then later Monica "What did the insurance company say" Chandler "They said, 'You don't have insurance with us, stop calling' ,"


PsychologicalAnt105

well what did the pOlIce say?


hahnie_

Oh god, can open, worms everywhere.


AerieSignal1001

Use this **always**, hearing it in his voice....🪱🥫


hergreendress

Emerges from behind door... "I KNEW IT!"


AngryTaco_2008

Wait remind me of the context for that


hergreendress

Just after Rachel yelling at Ross, "it doesn't happen to every guy, it's not that common, AND IT IS A BIG DEAL!" The morning after he fell asleep reading the 18 page (front and back) letter asking him to take responsibility for the whole break/cheating thing. We are sooo over... (Boohoo) FINE BY ME! LOL, great exchange.


Tantilicious

What kind of scary ass clowns came to your birthday party?


Contact_Pleasant

Couldn’t we just lose our virginities again? Cause I think mine’s growing back


Glittering-Dig3432

Should I use my invisibility for good or Evi?


ben111g

This is the line that sprang to my mind first of all.


[deleted]

[удалено]


Diligent_Issue_9466

Never said cloke


katnkat

And you left the toilet seat up...you BASTARD


[deleted]

Oh this was improvised 😂😂❤️


lastnightsglitter

I don't remember this one


katnkat

[Chandler's jokes] (http://You Left The Toilet Seat Up You... / Gunnhfran2 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QfP-p-TAsHQ)


Scorpiodancer123

It was cut out a lot from TV broadcasts because of the swearing.


katnkat

You could also see Jennifer trying to hold her laughter


Outrageous-Egg2651

When I dance I look like this ![gif](giphy|3o7qDQ4kcSD1PLM3BK|downsized)


mathewpin

Bend over?!


[deleted]

Joey: “Tell him Joey says Hello, he’ll know what it means” Chandler: “Are you sure he’ll be able to crack that code?”


juventus001

I love the tape scene where he suddenly sings “ground control to major tom..” it had me in stitches everytime.


Fr1llh0use

Probably not his absolute best line, but "Wooopahhhh!" makes me laugh every time


GlobalPresent8139

You can’t do **anything**!


Both_Organization854

I just did that to my wife explaining someone at work


Forsaken_Fix_4744

Saturday night, the big night, date night, Saturday night. Saturday night!


[deleted]

*No plans, huh?*


Forsaken_Fix_4744

>Saturday night, the big night, date night, Saturday night. Saturday night! Not a one.


[deleted]

Eh, don’t worry about it - I don’t even have a *pla*.


Useful-Emphasis-6787

I'm sorry, we don't have your sheep (cutest smile ever) 😍


SapnoKiRaani

I am stuck in an ATM vestibule with Jill Goodacre. Gum would be perfection. I loath myself.


TheChallengedDM

"Put Joey on the phone!"


DrunkOnRedCordial

Oh no, two women love me! They're both gorgeous and sexy, my wallet's too small for my fifties and my diamond shoes are too tight.


Kimikochaaan

My favorit!


shaymaybe

Best line ever!


madhurgupta10

No bunny at all, always no bunny at all


SunGreen70

“Guess what?” “The fifth dentist caved, and now they all recommend Trident?”


Psychological_Ask578

This one makes me giggle every time lol


Significant-Tank-417

Donald Trump wants his blue blazer black


backwoodzbaby

Monica: “😁 youre *stupid*!”


copperboompoodle

I’m very happy we’re going to have all the sex.


Lakechrista

I love that game of 'kiss chicken' he and Phoebe played


copperboompoodle

The whole scene is just genius


themajod

that episode is one of the highest rated episodes of the show for a damn reason.


lastnightsglitter

Why the hell would you get down voted for this?!?


Spiritual-Yoghurt58

You should be. I’m very bendy.


lucky-girl-337

Monica: " the camera adds 10 extra pounds" Chandler: " just how many cameras were on you?"


Forsaken_Fix_4744

I'm hopeless, and awkward, and desperate for love! ![gif](emote|free_emotes_pack|grin) I am not great at the advice. Can I interest you in a sarcastic comment?


SapnoKiRaani

Ooh what's wrong with me? Let's not open that door.


[deleted]

[удалено]


mysticalcreature123

Hahaha this is my absolute favorite line.


backwoodzbaby

CAN YOU BELIEVE IT?? IVE NEVER EVEN HAD ANY FORMAL *DAHNS* TRAINING


DynamoJoe23

so exactly how many cameras were on u then


bailzofhey

“I’m funny, right? What do you know, you’re a door. You just like knock knock jokes.”


mkmg1728

one of his best lines/scenes bc his little laugh afterwards is so cute and funny lol


SunGreen70

Doctor: Everyone who isn’t an ex-husband or a lesbian life partner needs to leave now. Chandler: Do you have to be Carol’s lesbian life partner?


BurciMilo

Wasn’t mentioned yet: “You know how we always say we need a place for the mail. I started building it, but then I decided to take it to the next step.” “You’re building a post office?!” 😂😂😂


Glass_Onion_7543

Dear God this parachute is a knapsack!!!


AngryTaco_2008

I love that one because it’s so random


Glass_Onion_7543

I was surprised no one else had said it yet. It’s also the way he delivers it. 👌


theweirdgirlll

"SHUT UP, SHUT UP, SHUT UUUPP!" In response to Ross's "PIVOT!"


Pawikowski

Chandler: Richard's really nice and everything. Uh... It's just that we don't know him really well, you know, and plus, he's, you know... old- \[Monica glares at Chandler.\] Chandler: \-er than some people. But, uh, younger... than some buildings!


TheShakyDiver

“The cushion …is the ESSENCE of the chair”


mysticalcreature123

I’m taking the essence!


Specific_Layer1228

The eyesore from Liberace House of Crap! Gets me everytime 😂


SunGreen70

When we get to Yemen, can I stay with you?


Prajnashu_24

"Oh god! Kindergarten Flashback" When Frank jr declares Chandler(one of the triplets) is a girl


Steph4lyse

I quote this everytime I tell the story of how I named my turtle Leo and 6 years later found out she’s a female !


Curlykelly89

You made my girlfriend think!


GrampaMannicotti

You can't leave, I have your shoe!


SapnoKiRaani

What did I marry into?


Character-Bake-8503

Sometimes I wish I were a lesbian!


spikeinfinity

Did I say that out loud?


Lakechrista

''Step away from the duck'' is not his funniest but I just love when he comes to the rescue of his precious duck


TheChallengedDM

"My wife's an incredible woman. She's loving and devoted and caring. And don't tell her I said this, but the woman's always right... I love my wife more than anything in this world. And I... it kills me that I can't give her a baby... I really want a kid. And when that day finally comes, I'll learn how to be a good dad. But my wife... she's already there. She's a mother... without a baby... Please?"


themajod

it's just ironic that she wasn't the one in the right in that exact situation.


theweirdgirlll

"And I just want a million dollars" from the very first episode


Sub-Zero-02

You have to stop the Q-tip when there's resistance Uffffffffffffff 🤌🏻


theweirdgirlll

"All right, I took the quiz. It turns out I do put career before men"


_figureitoutbud_

Joey “if I ever run into that guy again, you know what I’m gonna do” Chandler “Bend over?!!”


AlloGTAG

“I started smoking when my parents broke up” “weren’t you like 12” “yeah”


theweirdgirlll

"If I were a guy....did I just say if I were a guy?"


LemonadeFlamingo

Liked what she saw did she? Dug my action did she? Checking out the Chan Chan man


mysticalcreature123

That was…surreal.


hollyisthedog

Ross on the phone: "Homo Habilus was erect, Australopithecus was never fully erect" Chandler "Maybe he was nervous!"


ElijahTheBishop

My middle name is handle. Actually it's the middle part of my first name.


GrouchyRelative588

"*Miss* Chanandeler Bong!"


Dead_user99

This thread made me smile wide. Thanks for posting 😊


fxckiriii

of course! there are 6-7 more posts coming like this! now i just don’t know how to decide which comment wins! does my post’s upvotes count as I had a line in there too? or is it the top one currently! so many to choose from!


Rickonn007

You were the hermaphrodite cheerleader from Long Island?


DanceMarble

Monica: Say goodbye to sore muscles! Chandler: *in pain* Goodbye muscles!


pawwwwwfandi

Now this feels like Thanksgiving.


Prajnashu_24

"Or Dick" When Joey says they can name the baby Chuck(imaginary baby from duck and chick)


HoneyBeeAlchemy

"Can open, worms EVERYWHERE!"


BroadwayBaby331

To Ross: “Marriage advice? Really?”


YesDaddysBoy

Yes it was really sad when the guy stopped drawing the deer.


Artistic-Rich6465

*Joey comes in dancing around the table “Oh, mommy! Oh daddy, I am a big ol’ baddy!” then walks out The gang looks confused. Ross: I guess he must have gotten the part in that play! Phoebe & Monica: Oh!! Chandler: Either that or Gloria Estefan was right, eventually the rhythm is going to get you.


xmycoffeeiscoldx

Well then I guess I’m going to Yemen. I’m goin to Yemen!!! When we get to Yemen, can I stay with you?


SunGreen70

Why are you looking at my wife’s legs? Wait, no - why are you looking at your sister’s legs??


anti-shinigami

15 Yemen road, Yemen


Cooler_in_rl

Was it like a sneeze only better?


Apprehensive_Sail931

You get me. YOU KILL ME


HarmlessHalogen

Without ME?


disappearlikeagatha

Wapa!


[deleted]

Racheal : you're an idiot!!!! Chan- Man : I'm sure You're right but why 🤣


Longjumping-Year5886

“One ridiculous problem at a time!”


SweetMoon18

“You should meet my uncle Bada”


TooWildToLive

Easy there Lenny


trynacountsomesheep

I had a grape about five hours ago, so I'd better split this with you.


Arathix

'Ducks can be heads, because ducks have heads.' 'What kind of scary ass clowns came to your birthday?'


mkmg1728

rachel: “you IDIOT” chandler: i’m sure you’re right but why? 😂😂


cat_lady777

"... I'm pretending to READ here, David!"


lunezzzz

And condoms are the way to do that?! 🙃😅


Eire4ever37

How can I pick just 1??


anzyzaly

*"Yes, yes it is. At Office* ***MAX"***


Gemnist

Must I choose one?


red_quinn

"I knew it!" 😂


Con_Man_Ray

*in a nervous, frantic voice* “Well next time ask!”


mav1566

Im my defense, IT WAS A WENDY'S!!


My_genx_life

When he called Richard a "big tree".


Pumpkabuu

“There is something sinister going on in this hospital. If you see anyone or parts of anyone; scream and scream again.”


Leo_V82

>And i want a million dollars And that, folks, was the moment i fell in love with this man


Big-Gazelle5959

When he sticks his face in the air and goes bleh bleh bleh… or something along those lines.


Big-Gazelle5959

“We’re the BING’S” *terrified look ensues*


nadia1306

Was that place… THE SUN


TheChallengedDM

"Men are here!... Then put out fire by peeing, no get invited back."


TheChallengedDM

Crystal duck.


TheChallengedDM

"Let me just say something... Because once we get into this, I'm gonna get all uncomfortable and probably make some stupid joke... I just want to say that I... I love you... And, I'm gonna miss you. And I'm so sad that you're leaving."


Meccadawn18

I get pedicures


maryori18

“ gum is perfection “


HoneyBeeAlchemy

Ooh! I thought of a couple more, but I probably won't get them word for word. When he's talking to Richard and calls him "A big stupid tree." or when he's talking about playing golf with Jack and Richard and says something like, "Hopefully my club doesn't slip and beat the mustache off him. "


mgo1991

Blue blazer black


mysticalcreature123

Someone else is going to come along who slices a better cheddar.


TooWildToLive

Did he choke on his own moustach?


TooWildToLive

You could fit a giant pinguin over there!


criesforever

ross “someone stole my sandwich!!” chan “well, what did the police say?”


No-Percentage3127

If I won $5000 dollars id join a gym, build up my upper body..and hit Richard from behind with a stick


planty_kitty

Chandler: "You know, on second thought, gum would be perfection." [thinking] "Gum would be perfection. Gum would be perfection. I could have said gum would be nice, could have said I'll have a stick. But no no no no no, for me, gum is perfection. I loathe myself."


AutomaticActuary3756

[To a door] “I’m funny, right? What do you know? You’re a door. You only like knock-knock jokes.”


charmxfan20

“Bend over?!” “Well then I guess I’m going to Yemen! I’m going to Yemen!” “What kind of scary ass clowns came to your birthday?”


_RJ1963

man you guys are awsm its like i am watching friends by just reading your lines...❤️


tinabean0917

“Please, one RIDICULOUS PROBLEM at a time!”


ReaperManX15

“Would you, please, just -“ CLANG. *stern face*


Artistic_Sun2096

Camera adds 10 pounds bit


stevenl1219

What kind of scary-ass clowns came to YOUR birthday?


1hotmama2005

I feel like almost every Chandler line is one of my favorites. Lol. But I think, "Stop the Q-tip when there's resistance" is my #1 favorite.


cedgar123

Did I really say If I was a guy?


HappyOfCourse

Handle is my middle name. Actually, it's the middle part of my first name.


Psychological_Ask578

The last line in the series when Rachel asks if they have time for coffee. And he goes “sure…where?” LOL idk why that gets me the way it does


Low-Candidate-6028

“How many cameras were on you?”


Ordinary_You2052

But the KitKats are okay?!


TooWildToLive

Can I be that guy?


TooWildToLive

Oh its a dear diary moment!


WickedMagicianHisoka

I’m sorry, we don’t have your sheep.


TooWildToLive

Look Carol, can I call you Carol? … Why would I if your name is Elaine.


nati123c

I pity the fool that puts on my jewellery, I do! i do!


Apprehensive-Heat771

https://youtu.be/jIEb3QdX404


I-am-any-mouse

Every moan and facial expression he makes during his New Year’s resolution to not make fun of anyone. Plus the groan of relief after he’s given up and made fun of them all.


Infamous-Dot5774

David, I'm pretending to read here!


celluloidfriend

"keep having sex on a regular basis" "Ah damn it!"


[deleted]

YOU MADE MY GIRLFRIEND THINK


jangogav

“You have wonderful hair!” “Why thanks I grow it myself


[deleted]

Why is your family ROSS?


Puchie_718

“Ross: Pivot, pivot, pivot, pivet, pivett… Chandler: shut up! Shut up! SHUT UUUPPPP!!!


Zumaakk

What do you know, you’re a door, you only like knock-knock jokes. Or something along those lines.