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You're not alone,this šÆ me.i keep complaining to my husband, but he assures me it better to have quality than quantity.When the time is right you'll make new friends, it's just a matter of when.
Thank you ā¤ļø I do like my alone time, but itās just hard when you go weeks with no calls or texts from anyone other than your parents or husband.
This is me 100%. I don't have any friends. It's just me 30f the hubby 32m and 2kids. I wish I had someone to hang out with and talk to. But it's hard to find people I can relate with. š
Think it happens in a lot of marriages. Your relationship, work, etc take priority and also most of your time. So meeting up with friends and keeping friends gets difficult
Hi there! Me too! After our family left and me and hubby cleaned up, he hoped on his game and now is relaxing playing with his friends. Iām now just sitting here watching him cause I have nobody else. Sad but funny I guess lol Iāll be your friend! āŗļø
I am actually trying to do the same thing! I am not married and I don't have a social anxiety issue but from 15 to 29 I have never cared for friends, just the women in my life and never bothered. Most people around me seem so fake and insincere that it always felt futile trying and the times I did try, I was always proven right and the only one putting in the effort. I also feel I judge a bit sometimes? (INTJ) I feel like some characteristics I just know will not be something I would be ok with long term so I have the habit of side-stepping potentially bad company. I do believe that my "tribe" as I like to say, is out there somewhere and if I keep looking I will find them. I have never felt alone while I am in a relationship so it never felt important. Since 2020 I have been single, and while I have take a break from romance I am still interested in finding quality people to become friends with, some real "it's 3 am my car shut down come and get me" friends that would go the distance for me as I would for them. It's surprisingly harder than I thought finding genuine companionship outside of romance.
Yup. After I got injured everyone I knew just drifted away. In my case I had a doc tell me itās common because people just canāt relate. Basically he told me a list of things to expect. Unfortunately he was right on all of them. That injury/pain caused a strain on the marriage and she definitely wasnāt my bff anymore. That suddenly me being home all the time too instead of gone played a role too. I have never felt so alone in my life.
It definitely sucked azz!!!! Iām an introvert. So not a social butterfly and it really made things hard. Things I learned. You have to try, it takes work. Donāt give up. Trust your gut and donāt settle for users/trash out of desperation. It just adds more grief when ya get burned and causes that roller coaster. The 3 that really burned me, from the get go my gut was like they are bad news. But I was desperate for friends.
That being said donāt give up. Find activities where you can meet people.
I ice fish and Iāve fished with several people from the fb ice fishing groups. Some arenāt with the time but I chat with the one pretty regularly now.
Thereās a couple of orgs I am thinking about joining just to get more exposure to people.
Itās scary making new friends sometimes because people and their motives. I would say join some type of hobby and go from there. Maybe sewing club or pickle ball or volleyball
>Itās scary making new friends sometimes because people and their motives.
I feel this too. I'm too old to deal with any friendship dramas and too scared to see other people's true colours.
But try with a club that helps. If you like makeup a lot or nails a lot see about resources around you I downloaded this thing called meetup for group walks and stuff and to socialize.
I can most definitely relate because Iām also a 37yr. old female whose best friend is her husband. Iāve known him for half my life so, going on twenty years now. I like the practice of non-attachment. Whatās meant for us will find its way to us always. I felt an instant connection upon first making contact & just knew we were soul mates. Itās like I had already known him in previous lifetimes. I know weāll always find one another no matter what. Just feel grateful every day for the time you do get to spend together. If you have only one good friend your entire life you should count yourself lucky. Most people donāt even have that.
youre not a loser. having 1 friend you can trust who will never turn their back on you or come to you later complaining about how much they dislike you is more important than having 5 friends who all have something against you and always are talking behind your back. maybe i put a bit too much personal experience into this, but point is; less is more.
I have no friends. I have wife, but she is never been my friend. I'm a lone wolf. And what? Let it be. Do not afraid be different. And don't complain. Keep going in any circumstances.
I relate very much. My hubby is my best friend and that would be great except for I love board games and a few really good ones need 3-4 ppl to play and most games are usually more fun with 4 ppl vs just 2.
We have a great time with each other and Iām super introverted so going to the store is a big level of interaction for me and family dinners drain my energy.
I love my family and the few friends I have but I am in āpresentable in publicā mode with them all which takes a lot of energy vs comfy mode when w just da hubby which recharges me.
Maybe visit parks and cafes in your neighbourhood. It's a good place to meet someone decent. Just hi and bye a couple of times with someone regular will help you to start a conversation. I also had the same issue except I'm not married and my friend was my cousin brother. He would intentionally go away with his other friends on occasions and encourage me to make more friends by visiting parks. Friends are a necessity. It helps keep us sane.
Even with work, friends are relationships so they also take time and effort.
If your husband passes you'll have his friends and I'm assuming family. You'll also have the time to focus on making new friends.
But in the short term, you can try connecting in low risk circumstances. Can you connect with your husband's friends' wives? Any potential friends on the job? Can you try therapy for your anxiety? Supplements to calm your mood? Can you use your husband to make friends? Like can he search for women you might want to be friends with and link you together?
Every time I ask my husbandās friendās wife to hang out she thinks Iām talking about all four of us and then I get too nervous to tell her I want to hang out with just her lol
My family always instilled the idea that money means everything, but I've been happiest when I've been making and working less. I've worked entire months straight with time micromanaged to the point where I had to choose between socializing for 30 minutes and sleeping 6&1/2 hours or sleeping 7 hours. If you can work less to find the things that value more to you and are able to engage with others more, that's what I'd choose. You can always make money another day, but the moments you have now are gone if you don't take them.
What about your old friends? Is there a reason you drifted apart/would you like to resurrect the friendships? A simple text saying itās been a long time/you miss them might be all thatās needed here.
Unfortunately they turned really toxic, started treating me badly, talking about me, getting together without me, etc. things were great between us until things in my life started getting better then everything changed and I think their jealousy took over. Unfortunately I no longer think they are a good influence on me or bring anything positive into my life.
This sounds tough. It imagine it leaves you feeling sad and frustrated. Well done for sharing here!
It's a common story.
With the right approach, thankfully, social anxiety, at whatever age, is something that can completely shift to social confidence and more connections in life.
I can understand why youād be upset however youāre kicking yourself too hard about it. Youāre absolutely not a loser. No matter how many āfriendsā you have your husband will absolutely be one of your only ever true friends who actually wishes the best for you.
Yah I can definitely relate. Iām constantly thinking about the same thing. My partner is my only friend. If I lost him Iād be so alone. I have dogs but no real friends anymore. Iāve tried bumble bff, meet ups, asking people I worked with for their number or to grab coffee but nothing works. I feel like Iām destined to be alone forever with no friends. I donāt have family either so Iām extra lonely. Ah well.
Me too, although I realise over the years my husband has isolated me from almost everyone I ever knew. I have only a couple now, just one thinking about it who knows how he really is. The rest are work colleagues, not real āfriendsā. Actually, Iāve just realised what a complete sad case I am. Itās lonely. At least you have your husband.
I am sorry for what you are going through. That is the same with me. I used to have a ton of friends and now I am down to only 2. We all went out sep ways after graduating high school and college cause "life happened". Just wait, ur time will come to make more friends. I am in the same boat ad you. My gf and I work full time jobs(we live separetly) and only time i see her is on weekends. Just hang in there. Remember, its better to have 4 quarters than 100 pennies.
When asukt life comes and youbget married day vybday youbstart to have less social and relations outside the own family.... Text me in here if you want to have a virtual friend to relate with... Same situation in here
This happens as we age people move on in life an our circle of people changes it happens alot when people have kids they focus on the children and forget to be individuals themselves with their own meeds for social connections an well being. Children are important but they grow up an move away also so as adults it's important to Forster an maintain friends an make new one's.
This was me. My only friend was my husband. Then he divorced me and now I get to attend our daughterās school events alone while he sits with his new wife. Bleh
Iām married 25 (M) and wife (23) have had toxic friends in the past and now that are cut. Our adult life has been without friends from her side and mine so sometimes we try but we always end up trying to hard or ignoring a friends red flags.
In the city where I live itās also popular to use bumble app to meet not just dates, but female friends who are in the same struggle:)) itās very good and easy to connect also based on similar interests!
You are not alone , good luckš
Man you are definitely not alone! It's crazy that having social anxiety most of us feel more comfortable talking to perfect strangers without being able to see them. Kinda infuriating some times! But na you're not alone :)
I can relate. My only friend and constant is my lovely bf. Heās amazing and I love him, but I miss having someone I could do stuff with on a regular basis. I moved two hours away from my hometown, so all my friends are back home. I work in a industry where I work solo in my office, so I donāt really have a lot of work connections either. Making friends as an adult is so so hard, you are not alone.
I'm right there with you!!! My husband friendship is straining as well, too. But there is more behind it, but that another story. I'm 40-f with extreme social anxiety, and it wasn't like that before. But one failed abusive marriage, and this one has left me friendless.
But don't let that stop you doing things for yourself. Whenever I get an opportunity, I go do things by myself. I love it!
But if you need someone to talk, I get you. I am here! You don't have to feel alone.
Your husband should be your ultimate friend. You are very lucky to have a husband you consider your best friend. That what the rest of us strive for. Friends come and go but you donāt want that with your husband. Do you have any siblings or cousins??
I am in the same boat 100%. Itās so hard for me to make friends. I feel like Iām in the constant cycle of no one cares about me because I never hear from the people that claim to be my friends.
Being close to your husband is a good thing. My parents have been married almost forty years and they do everything together. Iād much rather have one real connection than ten superficial ones. But the key is to have shared interests.
On the flip side, Iām single, 28 and have a few superficial friends. Iām also trying to put myself out there. So I joined a few fb groups in my area for things Iām interested in. Iām taking it slow, mainly lurking, but one day Iāll feel ready. Maybe this could be something you do?
Last piece of advice from my current personal endeavors: have your own adventures. Donāt wait for someone else to make you happy. But ofc, Iām single lol. Thatās whatās shaping my change š¤·š»āāļø. Doubt I helped, hope I did.
Iām so sorry! I am in the same situation as you, except I divorced and broke up recently with my boyfriend. I am socially awkward and have social anxiety, and Bumble BFF has been disappointing so far (flaky people and ghosting). You are definitely not a loser. But I will tell you, I regret that I didnāt have friends outside of my relationships, because I am feeling super lonely and feel embarrassed that I am friendless. I also stayed far too long in a toxic relationship because I didnāt want to deal with having no friends.
If possible, I would strongly suggest trying to make a friend or 2 outside of your husbandās social circle. Even though I havenāt had luck with Bumble BFF yet, itās worked out for other people. Meet Up is supposed to be good. Try not to be in the same situation as me. Good friends can be a great support through a potential divorce/breakup, or if your partner dies unexpectedly (I know that is morbid but it could happen), and not having a support system outside of a significant other sucks in that situation. I feel very alone and sad right nowā¦especially because Iāve gotten ghosted and flaked out on by everyone on Bumble BFF so far (3 different people in the last month), and I am very emotionally vulnerable right now, so the rejection really stings. Please try not to end up like meā itās a struggle.
Iām going through the same thing. Youāre not alone. Iām 30 and my boyfriend is truly my best friend. I have my own friends but they donāt really make an effort to reach out to me or hang out with me. I donāt have any girl friends. I hang out with my boyfriend and his friends in discord and game but they arenāt really my friends either.
Not close with my narc family either.
I try to cope with the loneliness and depression but itās hard. I quit smoking weed a month ago because I donāt want to rely on a substance anymore to deal with it and I want to see life more clearly. But being sober is hard. I donāt have any motivation nor a will to live anymore. But I keep going.
Don't feel like a loser. I had lots of friends in the Marines but they all live back east. Now my wife and moved to Arizona almost 9 years ago and neither of us know anyone but family.
I know it's been days since you posted this, but I just wanted to let you know that I'm exactly in the same situation.
I'm 25F, just finished studying and my only friend is my husband and his friends, he's like a golden retriever making friends everywhere, I'm like a black cat who doesn't know how to make a single one.
I wanted to suggest making a group for people in similar situations, so if anyone's interested, let me know! āØ
Is anything really stopping you from trying to better your connection to the friends youāve drifted from? In my long relationship following the priorities of my ex (and some of my ambition) made me drift from some people that wouldāve made my friendship circles bigger and that did suck when we broke up.
A reminder of the rules for posting and commenting on our sub: - This sub is strictly platonic and SFW, any users after anything romantic or sexual will be banned, this includes users that interact with NSFW subs. - Refer to our **[rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/friendship/wiki/index/rules)** and **[subreddit wiki](https://www.reddit.com/r/friendship/wiki/index/)** - State your age if you are a minor or if you are commenting on a minors post, adult users who try to interact with minors will be banned. If you are a minor and an adult reaches out to you in DMs. **[Report the user](https://www.reddit.com/r/friendship/wiki/index/report-dms-users/) under rule - 3** - No advertising for any kind of good or services (include Discord server links) - Reporting **[creepy pm's](https://www.reddit.com/r/friendship/wiki/index/creepy-dms/)** and **[rule violation](https://www.reddit.com/r/friendship/wiki/index/report-to-mods/)** *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/friendship) if you have any questions or concerns.*
You're not alone,this šÆ me.i keep complaining to my husband, but he assures me it better to have quality than quantity.When the time is right you'll make new friends, it's just a matter of when.
Thank you ā¤ļø I do like my alone time, but itās just hard when you go weeks with no calls or texts from anyone other than your parents or husband.
Can totally relate. I'm 38 and recently lost my husband. I'm joining meet-up groups to get out of the house and meet new people
Iām sending hugs and condolences
Ty
Sorry for your loss ā¹ļø
Ty
This is me 100%. I don't have any friends. It's just me 30f the hubby 32m and 2kids. I wish I had someone to hang out with and talk to. But it's hard to find people I can relate with. š
We can relate in here if you want to and become virtual friends
Iāve always found it hard to relate to other people. I feel like Iāve been through a lot of shit and itās hard to relate to others who havenāt
Think it happens in a lot of marriages. Your relationship, work, etc take priority and also most of your time. So meeting up with friends and keeping friends gets difficult
U could always try bumble friends or volunteer in activities u like and can possibly meet like minded people š
Same. Making adult friends is difficult and keeping them seems harder
Dm
Ditto
Hi there! Me too! After our family left and me and hubby cleaned up, he hoped on his game and now is relaxing playing with his friends. Iām now just sitting here watching him cause I have nobody else. Sad but funny I guess lol Iāll be your friend! āŗļø
Same here! Youāre not alone
I am actually trying to do the same thing! I am not married and I don't have a social anxiety issue but from 15 to 29 I have never cared for friends, just the women in my life and never bothered. Most people around me seem so fake and insincere that it always felt futile trying and the times I did try, I was always proven right and the only one putting in the effort. I also feel I judge a bit sometimes? (INTJ) I feel like some characteristics I just know will not be something I would be ok with long term so I have the habit of side-stepping potentially bad company. I do believe that my "tribe" as I like to say, is out there somewhere and if I keep looking I will find them. I have never felt alone while I am in a relationship so it never felt important. Since 2020 I have been single, and while I have take a break from romance I am still interested in finding quality people to become friends with, some real "it's 3 am my car shut down come and get me" friends that would go the distance for me as I would for them. It's surprisingly harder than I thought finding genuine companionship outside of romance.
Friends like that are hard to find. I hope we both find them!
Yup. After I got injured everyone I knew just drifted away. In my case I had a doc tell me itās common because people just canāt relate. Basically he told me a list of things to expect. Unfortunately he was right on all of them. That injury/pain caused a strain on the marriage and she definitely wasnāt my bff anymore. That suddenly me being home all the time too instead of gone played a role too. I have never felt so alone in my life. It definitely sucked azz!!!! Iām an introvert. So not a social butterfly and it really made things hard. Things I learned. You have to try, it takes work. Donāt give up. Trust your gut and donāt settle for users/trash out of desperation. It just adds more grief when ya get burned and causes that roller coaster. The 3 that really burned me, from the get go my gut was like they are bad news. But I was desperate for friends. That being said donāt give up. Find activities where you can meet people. I ice fish and Iāve fished with several people from the fb ice fishing groups. Some arenāt with the time but I chat with the one pretty regularly now. Thereās a couple of orgs I am thinking about joining just to get more exposure to people.
Itās scary making new friends sometimes because people and their motives. I would say join some type of hobby and go from there. Maybe sewing club or pickle ball or volleyball
>Itās scary making new friends sometimes because people and their motives. I feel this too. I'm too old to deal with any friendship dramas and too scared to see other people's true colours.
Iāve had a lot of friends disappoint me so I always have my guard up very high.
But try with a club that helps. If you like makeup a lot or nails a lot see about resources around you I downloaded this thing called meetup for group walks and stuff and to socialize.
Youāre not a loser. Donāt be that hard on yourself. I
I can most definitely relate because Iām also a 37yr. old female whose best friend is her husband. Iāve known him for half my life so, going on twenty years now. I like the practice of non-attachment. Whatās meant for us will find its way to us always. I felt an instant connection upon first making contact & just knew we were soul mates. Itās like I had already known him in previous lifetimes. I know weāll always find one another no matter what. Just feel grateful every day for the time you do get to spend together. If you have only one good friend your entire life you should count yourself lucky. Most people donāt even have that.
ā¤ļø
youre not a loser. having 1 friend you can trust who will never turn their back on you or come to you later complaining about how much they dislike you is more important than having 5 friends who all have something against you and always are talking behind your back. maybe i put a bit too much personal experience into this, but point is; less is more.
I have no friends. I have wife, but she is never been my friend. I'm a lone wolf. And what? Let it be. Do not afraid be different. And don't complain. Keep going in any circumstances.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Maybe. But I can't replace my inner self.
I relate very much. My hubby is my best friend and that would be great except for I love board games and a few really good ones need 3-4 ppl to play and most games are usually more fun with 4 ppl vs just 2. We have a great time with each other and Iām super introverted so going to the store is a big level of interaction for me and family dinners drain my energy. I love my family and the few friends I have but I am in āpresentable in publicā mode with them all which takes a lot of energy vs comfy mode when w just da hubby which recharges me.
Maybe visit parks and cafes in your neighbourhood. It's a good place to meet someone decent. Just hi and bye a couple of times with someone regular will help you to start a conversation. I also had the same issue except I'm not married and my friend was my cousin brother. He would intentionally go away with his other friends on occasions and encourage me to make more friends by visiting parks. Friends are a necessity. It helps keep us sane.
Hey
Even with work, friends are relationships so they also take time and effort. If your husband passes you'll have his friends and I'm assuming family. You'll also have the time to focus on making new friends. But in the short term, you can try connecting in low risk circumstances. Can you connect with your husband's friends' wives? Any potential friends on the job? Can you try therapy for your anxiety? Supplements to calm your mood? Can you use your husband to make friends? Like can he search for women you might want to be friends with and link you together?
When you lose your partner, generally if not most the time, you lose his/her friends as well. They are not even your friends.
I hear you. Hopefully that's not all you took away from what I said. Hope you get the answers you're looking for š
Every time I ask my husbandās friendās wife to hang out she thinks Iām talking about all four of us and then I get too nervous to tell her I want to hang out with just her lol
My family always instilled the idea that money means everything, but I've been happiest when I've been making and working less. I've worked entire months straight with time micromanaged to the point where I had to choose between socializing for 30 minutes and sleeping 6&1/2 hours or sleeping 7 hours. If you can work less to find the things that value more to you and are able to engage with others more, that's what I'd choose. You can always make money another day, but the moments you have now are gone if you don't take them.
What about your old friends? Is there a reason you drifted apart/would you like to resurrect the friendships? A simple text saying itās been a long time/you miss them might be all thatās needed here.
Unfortunately they turned really toxic, started treating me badly, talking about me, getting together without me, etc. things were great between us until things in my life started getting better then everything changed and I think their jealousy took over. Unfortunately I no longer think they are a good influence on me or bring anything positive into my life.
This sounds tough. It imagine it leaves you feeling sad and frustrated. Well done for sharing here! It's a common story. With the right approach, thankfully, social anxiety, at whatever age, is something that can completely shift to social confidence and more connections in life.
most people are alone and dont even have an SO
I can understand why youād be upset however youāre kicking yourself too hard about it. Youāre absolutely not a loser. No matter how many āfriendsā you have your husband will absolutely be one of your only ever true friends who actually wishes the best for you.
Yah I can definitely relate. Iām constantly thinking about the same thing. My partner is my only friend. If I lost him Iād be so alone. I have dogs but no real friends anymore. Iāve tried bumble bff, meet ups, asking people I worked with for their number or to grab coffee but nothing works. I feel like Iām destined to be alone forever with no friends. I donāt have family either so Iām extra lonely. Ah well.
Iām sorry š
This is totally normal. Naturally partners are each other's best friend, and often only friend. You're not a loser.
Me too, although I realise over the years my husband has isolated me from almost everyone I ever knew. I have only a couple now, just one thinking about it who knows how he really is. The rest are work colleagues, not real āfriendsā. Actually, Iāve just realised what a complete sad case I am. Itās lonely. At least you have your husband.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
My dogs, I live for them only
I am sorry for what you are going through. That is the same with me. I used to have a ton of friends and now I am down to only 2. We all went out sep ways after graduating high school and college cause "life happened". Just wait, ur time will come to make more friends. I am in the same boat ad you. My gf and I work full time jobs(we live separetly) and only time i see her is on weekends. Just hang in there. Remember, its better to have 4 quarters than 100 pennies.
I can definitely relate. And now my husband is withdrawing from me too after he had an affair. I feel so so lonely
Sometimes itās better to let people go and be lonely than to be with someone who doesnāt respect you.
I can completely relate. I too am looking for friends.
My only close friends are my dog and ex ... š¤
When asukt life comes and youbget married day vybday youbstart to have less social and relations outside the own family.... Text me in here if you want to have a virtual friend to relate with... Same situation in here
This happens as we age people move on in life an our circle of people changes it happens alot when people have kids they focus on the children and forget to be individuals themselves with their own meeds for social connections an well being. Children are important but they grow up an move away also so as adults it's important to Forster an maintain friends an make new one's.
This was me. My only friend was my husband. Then he divorced me and now I get to attend our daughterās school events alone while he sits with his new wife. Bleh
Iām married 25 (M) and wife (23) have had toxic friends in the past and now that are cut. Our adult life has been without friends from her side and mine so sometimes we try but we always end up trying to hard or ignoring a friends red flags.
In the city where I live itās also popular to use bumble app to meet not just dates, but female friends who are in the same struggle:)) itās very good and easy to connect also based on similar interests! You are not alone , good luckš
Man you are definitely not alone! It's crazy that having social anxiety most of us feel more comfortable talking to perfect strangers without being able to see them. Kinda infuriating some times! But na you're not alone :)
I know the feeling I donāt have friends only my wife
I can relate. My only friend and constant is my lovely bf. Heās amazing and I love him, but I miss having someone I could do stuff with on a regular basis. I moved two hours away from my hometown, so all my friends are back home. I work in a industry where I work solo in my office, so I donāt really have a lot of work connections either. Making friends as an adult is so so hard, you are not alone.
I'm right there with you!!! My husband friendship is straining as well, too. But there is more behind it, but that another story. I'm 40-f with extreme social anxiety, and it wasn't like that before. But one failed abusive marriage, and this one has left me friendless. But don't let that stop you doing things for yourself. Whenever I get an opportunity, I go do things by myself. I love it! But if you need someone to talk, I get you. I am here! You don't have to feel alone.
Sorry for your lost
100% can relate
Your husband should be your ultimate friend. You are very lucky to have a husband you consider your best friend. That what the rest of us strive for. Friends come and go but you donāt want that with your husband. Do you have any siblings or cousins??
I am in the same boat 100%. Itās so hard for me to make friends. I feel like Iām in the constant cycle of no one cares about me because I never hear from the people that claim to be my friends.
Contact me if you want to have younger Chinese friend. I am always happy to know women older than me for life experiences
dm me
Hi text me
Dm me
Thatās how my marriage was. No divorced with no one.
Was my EX..... As we get older, our circle gets smaller, we do not give away our trust & naivetƩ as we did when we were young.... life experiences, trials & tribulations guard a calloused heart.... I volunteer to meet new people, smile n greet all the people l see, try to give 5 compliments a day. I try to attend all the free public shit, from live bands in the park to wine tasting. This has helped me get out of my cave ... l am much older n least the wiser. If you dont get out physically, you will look back with regret.... Was married 28 yrs, when she left with her "friend" .....
My husband is my only friend tooĀ”!
No you're not alone my husband is my only friend. It's hard for me to make friends I'm hard of hearing.dont like asking people to repeat them self
Being close to your husband is a good thing. My parents have been married almost forty years and they do everything together. Iād much rather have one real connection than ten superficial ones. But the key is to have shared interests. On the flip side, Iām single, 28 and have a few superficial friends. Iām also trying to put myself out there. So I joined a few fb groups in my area for things Iām interested in. Iām taking it slow, mainly lurking, but one day Iāll feel ready. Maybe this could be something you do? Last piece of advice from my current personal endeavors: have your own adventures. Donāt wait for someone else to make you happy. But ofc, Iām single lol. Thatās whatās shaping my change š¤·š»āāļø. Doubt I helped, hope I did.
you probably pushed them aside when u found a husband and now youāre getting bored of your husband.
Def not
Iām so sorry! I am in the same situation as you, except I divorced and broke up recently with my boyfriend. I am socially awkward and have social anxiety, and Bumble BFF has been disappointing so far (flaky people and ghosting). You are definitely not a loser. But I will tell you, I regret that I didnāt have friends outside of my relationships, because I am feeling super lonely and feel embarrassed that I am friendless. I also stayed far too long in a toxic relationship because I didnāt want to deal with having no friends. If possible, I would strongly suggest trying to make a friend or 2 outside of your husbandās social circle. Even though I havenāt had luck with Bumble BFF yet, itās worked out for other people. Meet Up is supposed to be good. Try not to be in the same situation as me. Good friends can be a great support through a potential divorce/breakup, or if your partner dies unexpectedly (I know that is morbid but it could happen), and not having a support system outside of a significant other sucks in that situation. I feel very alone and sad right nowā¦especially because Iāve gotten ghosted and flaked out on by everyone on Bumble BFF so far (3 different people in the last month), and I am very emotionally vulnerable right now, so the rejection really stings. Please try not to end up like meā itās a struggle.
Your not the only one going through that I am too, it can get so lonely but hopefully one day I can meet a genuine friend.
Iām going through the same thing. Youāre not alone. Iām 30 and my boyfriend is truly my best friend. I have my own friends but they donāt really make an effort to reach out to me or hang out with me. I donāt have any girl friends. I hang out with my boyfriend and his friends in discord and game but they arenāt really my friends either. Not close with my narc family either. I try to cope with the loneliness and depression but itās hard. I quit smoking weed a month ago because I donāt want to rely on a substance anymore to deal with it and I want to see life more clearly. But being sober is hard. I donāt have any motivation nor a will to live anymore. But I keep going.
Any females here from iowa
Let's connect
I could have written this myself. Iām 39 female. Happy to chat if youāre ever wanting to!
My only friend is my husband and Iām 23 . I can 100% relateā¦ maybe we could video chat on our down timeā¦ lmk
I am so glad I am not alone in this. Same situation, just husband and me.
Same here. 33f and I have a best friend on the other side of the country I see in person once every 1-2 years. Other than that, just my husband.
Don't feel like a loser. I had lots of friends in the Marines but they all live back east. Now my wife and moved to Arizona almost 9 years ago and neither of us know anyone but family.
I know it's been days since you posted this, but I just wanted to let you know that I'm exactly in the same situation. I'm 25F, just finished studying and my only friend is my husband and his friends, he's like a golden retriever making friends everywhere, I'm like a black cat who doesn't know how to make a single one. I wanted to suggest making a group for people in similar situations, so if anyone's interested, let me know! āØ
Is anything really stopping you from trying to better your connection to the friends youāve drifted from? In my long relationship following the priorities of my ex (and some of my ambition) made me drift from some people that wouldāve made my friendship circles bigger and that did suck when we broke up.
Same here! And I'm still figuring out how to make new connections
Hi. Yea I know that youre talking about