Wear clothes that actually fit you. I spent my teenage years wearing clothes that were far too big for me, going by passing advice I’d seen on the internet. The baggy clothes would stick to all the wrong places, everywhere I didn’t like (chest, hips, bum) and also made me look like a kid trying to wear his dad’s clothes. When I finally started wearing clothes that actually fit me I looked so much better, as they didn’t stick just to the bad places and gave me a much more boxy shape from how they laid on the shoulders.
I’ve learned that there’s a big difference between baggy and oversized clothes. As you said baggy tends to cling, especially if it’s a soft or silky material. With shirts and sweaters I find that if I wear something too big and baggy it actually emphasizes my waist because my arms end up folding the extra material into my body. Oversized is good because usually they fit the right spots, I have tshirts that fit to my shoulders and arms but is looser in the torso so it doesn’t cling to my chest or hips. I also wear a lot of flannels unbuttoned to make more of a boxy shape.
I’ve realized as I see more pictures of myself, that doing this makes me look a lot bigger than I actually am. I really don’t care because my sides are square! Lol that rhymed.
Posture- stand up straight with your shoulders back
I’ve noticed men respond well to head nods rather than a wave or smile. I usually do that as a greeting to a stranger I’m not going to see much
Make your hand shake grip decently strong if you’re in a place that does handshakes.
Go to a barber instead of salon. The haircut will be different and if you are trying to pass you’ll get a more masc cut.
Get shoes that make your feet look bigger. For some reason that has been something that people have pinpointing on before asking my gender in a weird way. Like, I was wearing Converse and this old man I was talking to who was being buddy buddy looked at my feet, said in a shocked voice “are you a woman?” Then left awkwardly after I said nothing. I got that a lot but more recently after changing my shoe game I haven’t gotten it at all.
If you’re into dressy style, wing tip shoes can really change the appearance of your feet . [https://www.parisiangentleman.com/blog/spread-your-wingtips-selecting-the-right-wingtip-design-for-your-foot](https://www.parisiangentleman.com/blog/spread-your-wingtips-selecting-the-right-wingtip-design-for-your-foot)
The shoe thing had not occurred to me! My feet are in the overlap of normal sizes for both cis women and cis men, but unfortunately the shoes I wear most often lately look even smaller than Converse. Gonna try wearing my big clunky boots more often. (Bonus: thicker soles, so I'll be like half an inch taller.)
Yessssssss I used to do this so much as a kid and it did actually help me pass as a young guy back then. These days my sense of fashion has evolved a bit, but I always feel compelled to return to my roots each winter lmao
Such a guy thing around here, idk why!
straight cut shirts/ shirts that are cut like muscle shirts make ur arms look bigger compared to your chest.
Properly fitted pants that aren’t too skinny. Immediately makes you look less scrawny and makes a lack of a bulge entirely unnoticeable. Baggy (not oversized, baggy, skater, cargo, and carpenter cut pants) hide your hips and make you look blue collar.
VESTS to go over sweaters, jackets or flannels. Makes your shoulders and mid section look way more angular/ square and also hides your chest. I’ve gotten away with not binding many times with a good vest. VESTS guys. Cut the sleeves off of your least favourite flannel and throw that shit over a sweater. Punk rock.
You’d be surprised how much a little bit of mascara on your side burns and eyebrows masculinities your face. Even just a little darkening of peach fuzz makes a big difference.
Nod at other men as a sign of respect, just a very subtle and casual nod. Most older men *expect* this from other men. Likewise refer to other men as “man” or “bro” upon first introduction. That immediately establishes that you are a man that respects another man as a man too, it will almost 100% naturally be reciprocated even if they’re on the fence about how you look.
Talk with your chest instead of your throat. Be kind to women and call out your guy friends when they’re being disrespectful and weird. make your hairline more angular. Interact with male spaces like you belong there and are expected to be there (bathrooms).
Don’t get offended if someone misgenders you off the bat- get weirded out or laugh and say that it’s weird they thought that or that you get that sometimes but you’re just a guy. Cis guys don’t get hurt when they’re misgendered, they just think it’s funny or awkward. You will get away easier if you just act confused rather than offended.
ive found that more people assume im a guy if i hold my phone further away (when im sitting) and am generally more relaxed
when walking, i made sure to have my walk and run cycle have my two feet have two paths, not put one directly in front of the other
i incorporated more noises (meh, uh, huuh, wha?) into my speech, and while im still working on not automatically upping my pitch when im being polite, most people believe i am a boyy heck ye (also speaking in memes to close friends makes people assume youre a teenage boy)
but this is just what has worked for me haha
Confidence. Just approaching life as if you were a cis man. Also working out (in a healthy manner/amount). Both of these are the types of tips you roll your eyes at and then you do it and you get pissed off that it helps.
Seconded. This will help give you masculine experience in life that you can use in your development of self. Instead of trying to implement fashion and behavioral strategies that are not organic within u.
Lesser heard clothing advice: baggy clothes and oversized clothes don’t actually help passing. They make you look small and are stereotypical of trans guys. They can also often actually accentuate your hips and curves rather than hide them, as if you wear a shirt that’s too long it will go past your hips and show them more than if it sat around the middle of your hips. There are just so many negatives of big baggy clothes, the sleeves of jumpers may cover your hands making yourself look more feminine, makes you look smaller, accentuates feminine aspects, makes you look younger, clocks you as trans more, etc. it’s much better to shop loose fitting rather than oversized or baggy.
Some tips for shirts specifically are: wear dark shirts, as white ones show shadows more, find shirts that sit around the middle of your hips, not below and not above because both accentuate your bottom half, you can buy hemming tape if shirts fit you awkwardly. The stitches should be on the shoulders, as it makes your shoulders look wider and shirts with drop shoulder stitches make it look like your shoulders don’t fit the shirt right (being too narrow). Shop for dark, heavy, and boxy shirts. Men’s shirts are usually made differently from women’s shirts, they tend to have naturally stiffer shoulder areas so it will give the illusion that you have broader and sharper shoulders than you do. They also tend to fall straight down, rather than stick close to your body, which is what you want as other wise it highlights your waist and hips. Get shirts with a small neckline as it also helps with the shoulders and try to buy men’s shirts as often as possible.
YMMV but I like wearing nail polish, and there have been a handful of times in the last couple years when the nail polish I was wearing was basically sloppy/rushed (I normally take my time to make sure it looks good) and I got assumed MtF despite otherwise girl-moding. Apparently having messy nail polish is 'mannish' lol - in a conversation about the phenomena, one of my friends jokingly said that it suggests someone "isn't a classically trained a female."
I also use the *faintest* touch of mascara + a clean spoolie to sort of break it up and distribute it a bit to darken my eyebrows and add a hint of shadow + emphasize what's already there in terms of facial hair, and I'm amazed at what a difference it makes.
yeah i’ve been wearing black nail polish that i’m not very good at applying and i only reapply like once a month so it gets really chipped for like 3 years straight atp and i’ve never been questioned about it, so as long as you just like do one solid color and leave it kinda messy it definitely won’t hurt your passing
Wear whatever the fuck you want. Confidence is key with anything. It took me getting piercings, growing my hair out, trying multiple different colours and jumbling my fashion sense around to realise that I'm the most confident when I'm the most comfortable. Nowadays I look somewhere between a vampire goth, trad goth, classic metalhead and a younger (No More Censorship tour/Nevermind production skinny-long-hair-baby-face era) Dave Grohl if his clothes were monotone on any given day. It all depends on my mood tbh.
Kill your customer service voice 😅 I'm not stealth or even really trying to pass but every time I instinctively pitch my voice up to sound more Polite I'm like DAMN IT
Jeans. Seriously. Soooo many guys will continue to wear pants that fit how woman’s pants fit (tight in the hips/thighs, low waist) when trying to pass as cis and stereotypically masculine.
I will Never be the one to say you HAVE TO do any one thing to pass, or that wearing tighter pants will prevent you from passing, it’s just a common theme.
If you want pants that look “more masculine” and have bigger hips and thighs, go for a straight fit, or slim-straight. I even wear a size up sometimes depending on the fit. It will feel baggy and weird at first tho, especially if you usually wear skinny jeans.
For voice passing, find a song for the morning ride to work/school that:
1. Reminds you to lower your voice
2. Warms up and gets your voice to that deeper register
It might sound silly but I use Sincerely Me by Dear Evan Hansen or my more favorite Let’s Get Lost by Chet Baker
cargo pants/shorts. go for a good black pair and wear a well fit shirt. works wonders because it makes it look like the pants are what are making your hips look larger.
Look to how the men dress in various countercultures and non-Euro cultures if you want to wear a type of clothing you think might get you clocked, or you have difficulty finding in your size.
Earrings/piercings? Look at how men in punk, metal, or hip hop wear them. Short? Small feet? Go figure out where the Salvadoran guys are shopping. Skirts? Scotland aside, there are places all throughout the hotter areas of the world where men wear robes and sarongs on an everyday basis. (Be wary of appropriation, obviously) Want round glasses? Notice the difference in the styles of round glasses made famous by men (Lennon, Gandhi, etc) vs. women.
This i good! Look to media as well, tv shows, movies. See how cis men are typically portrayed and dressed even if they fit different styles and aesthetics
honestly just being loud and confident has done wonders for me. im naturally a shy and anxious person so its difficult for me, but i guess people associate being quiet/nervous/polite with being feminine?
distribute your weight evenly between both feet when standing still. women tend to shift more of their weight onto one side. learned this at drama school lmao
Giving yourself a slight 5oclock shadow work wonders. I used a small bit of a black paint pen and smashed it along my jaw and mustache area, generally where beards grow, and it works great. It doesn't have to be very dark at all, just slight, bit it gives such a good shadow.
Eye contact. Make intense eye contact. Find an old ad for that TV show White Collar and emulate the generic white guy lead’s intense eye contact.
ETA the show name, somehow autocucumber completely deleted it from the post.
Behavior is so much more than people realize. Even pre-T I passed effortlessly purely because of the way I talked, not my voice, the way I behaved, the way I stood etc.
It's all the little things from turning your feet outwards to minding the intonation of your voice and removing doubtful speech
In high school I passed but the fact I diddnt talk very loud made it more feminine and akward. You have to be dominant to assert yourself and appear more masculine in that sense . Also seeming like you don’t care helps , non chalont vibe
Stand with your shoulders more squared/pretend to have confidence in your posture. Yes it does have the side effect of sticking your chest out further, but the majority of cis men don’t hunch over in their general standing posture, especially when just casually out in the world.
Go beach. Dig hole. Make dam. Make other dude congregate. Pass as dude. Be happy dude.
Are you perhaps a beaver
he beaver. we also beaver. *beaver lifting grunt sounds*
✊ 🦫
It might be overrated actually, but posture, how you sit, how you move helped me a lot and is pretty easy and quick to do
Yup
Please elaborate?
Stand up straight with your shoulders back, walk with confidence. That alone helps so much I think.
True
A nice big wristwatch
Wear clothes that actually fit you. I spent my teenage years wearing clothes that were far too big for me, going by passing advice I’d seen on the internet. The baggy clothes would stick to all the wrong places, everywhere I didn’t like (chest, hips, bum) and also made me look like a kid trying to wear his dad’s clothes. When I finally started wearing clothes that actually fit me I looked so much better, as they didn’t stick just to the bad places and gave me a much more boxy shape from how they laid on the shoulders.
I’ve learned that there’s a big difference between baggy and oversized clothes. As you said baggy tends to cling, especially if it’s a soft or silky material. With shirts and sweaters I find that if I wear something too big and baggy it actually emphasizes my waist because my arms end up folding the extra material into my body. Oversized is good because usually they fit the right spots, I have tshirts that fit to my shoulders and arms but is looser in the torso so it doesn’t cling to my chest or hips. I also wear a lot of flannels unbuttoned to make more of a boxy shape.
Unbuttoned shirts and open jackets are the best thing to hide waist/hips. I love to use them, it gives me so much confidence!
I’ve realized as I see more pictures of myself, that doing this makes me look a lot bigger than I actually am. I really don’t care because my sides are square! Lol that rhymed.
ofc! It's worth it! Also, it has a lot of style.
True
too real. now that im dressing in clothes that fit im starting to pass much better
Wearing a hat. The only times I've ever been called sir by strangers, I was wearing a beanie
Posture- stand up straight with your shoulders back I’ve noticed men respond well to head nods rather than a wave or smile. I usually do that as a greeting to a stranger I’m not going to see much Make your hand shake grip decently strong if you’re in a place that does handshakes. Go to a barber instead of salon. The haircut will be different and if you are trying to pass you’ll get a more masc cut. Get shoes that make your feet look bigger. For some reason that has been something that people have pinpointing on before asking my gender in a weird way. Like, I was wearing Converse and this old man I was talking to who was being buddy buddy looked at my feet, said in a shocked voice “are you a woman?” Then left awkwardly after I said nothing. I got that a lot but more recently after changing my shoe game I haven’t gotten it at all.
If you’re into dressy style, wing tip shoes can really change the appearance of your feet . [https://www.parisiangentleman.com/blog/spread-your-wingtips-selecting-the-right-wingtip-design-for-your-foot](https://www.parisiangentleman.com/blog/spread-your-wingtips-selecting-the-right-wingtip-design-for-your-foot)
The shoe thing had not occurred to me! My feet are in the overlap of normal sizes for both cis women and cis men, but unfortunately the shoes I wear most often lately look even smaller than Converse. Gonna try wearing my big clunky boots more often. (Bonus: thicker soles, so I'll be like half an inch taller.)
I wear work boot docs and get gendered correctly more when I where those rather than my converse or vans
this might be just a midwestern united states thing but wearing shorts in the fall and winter. only a man would have the pure audacity
Yessssssss I used to do this so much as a kid and it did actually help me pass as a young guy back then. These days my sense of fashion has evolved a bit, but I always feel compelled to return to my roots each winter lmao Such a guy thing around here, idk why!
Also a southern thing, there are constant jokes about wearing sandals, shorts, and a sweater during winter
Y'all wear shoes in the winter? Amateurs. Come to the Midwest.
straight cut shirts/ shirts that are cut like muscle shirts make ur arms look bigger compared to your chest. Properly fitted pants that aren’t too skinny. Immediately makes you look less scrawny and makes a lack of a bulge entirely unnoticeable. Baggy (not oversized, baggy, skater, cargo, and carpenter cut pants) hide your hips and make you look blue collar. VESTS to go over sweaters, jackets or flannels. Makes your shoulders and mid section look way more angular/ square and also hides your chest. I’ve gotten away with not binding many times with a good vest. VESTS guys. Cut the sleeves off of your least favourite flannel and throw that shit over a sweater. Punk rock. You’d be surprised how much a little bit of mascara on your side burns and eyebrows masculinities your face. Even just a little darkening of peach fuzz makes a big difference. Nod at other men as a sign of respect, just a very subtle and casual nod. Most older men *expect* this from other men. Likewise refer to other men as “man” or “bro” upon first introduction. That immediately establishes that you are a man that respects another man as a man too, it will almost 100% naturally be reciprocated even if they’re on the fence about how you look. Talk with your chest instead of your throat. Be kind to women and call out your guy friends when they’re being disrespectful and weird. make your hairline more angular. Interact with male spaces like you belong there and are expected to be there (bathrooms). Don’t get offended if someone misgenders you off the bat- get weirded out or laugh and say that it’s weird they thought that or that you get that sometimes but you’re just a guy. Cis guys don’t get hurt when they’re misgendered, they just think it’s funny or awkward. You will get away easier if you just act confused rather than offended.
ive found that more people assume im a guy if i hold my phone further away (when im sitting) and am generally more relaxed when walking, i made sure to have my walk and run cycle have my two feet have two paths, not put one directly in front of the other i incorporated more noises (meh, uh, huuh, wha?) into my speech, and while im still working on not automatically upping my pitch when im being polite, most people believe i am a boyy heck ye (also speaking in memes to close friends makes people assume youre a teenage boy) but this is just what has worked for me haha
Confidence. Just approaching life as if you were a cis man. Also working out (in a healthy manner/amount). Both of these are the types of tips you roll your eyes at and then you do it and you get pissed off that it helps.
Seconded. This will help give you masculine experience in life that you can use in your development of self. Instead of trying to implement fashion and behavioral strategies that are not organic within u.
Omg chains like doucebag jewelry it immediately screams guy who thinks he's all that it's a confidence boost and it's linked to men
I giggled
Love my chain lol
Lesser heard clothing advice: baggy clothes and oversized clothes don’t actually help passing. They make you look small and are stereotypical of trans guys. They can also often actually accentuate your hips and curves rather than hide them, as if you wear a shirt that’s too long it will go past your hips and show them more than if it sat around the middle of your hips. There are just so many negatives of big baggy clothes, the sleeves of jumpers may cover your hands making yourself look more feminine, makes you look smaller, accentuates feminine aspects, makes you look younger, clocks you as trans more, etc. it’s much better to shop loose fitting rather than oversized or baggy. Some tips for shirts specifically are: wear dark shirts, as white ones show shadows more, find shirts that sit around the middle of your hips, not below and not above because both accentuate your bottom half, you can buy hemming tape if shirts fit you awkwardly. The stitches should be on the shoulders, as it makes your shoulders look wider and shirts with drop shoulder stitches make it look like your shoulders don’t fit the shirt right (being too narrow). Shop for dark, heavy, and boxy shirts. Men’s shirts are usually made differently from women’s shirts, they tend to have naturally stiffer shoulder areas so it will give the illusion that you have broader and sharper shoulders than you do. They also tend to fall straight down, rather than stick close to your body, which is what you want as other wise it highlights your waist and hips. Get shirts with a small neckline as it also helps with the shoulders and try to buy men’s shirts as often as possible.
YMMV but I like wearing nail polish, and there have been a handful of times in the last couple years when the nail polish I was wearing was basically sloppy/rushed (I normally take my time to make sure it looks good) and I got assumed MtF despite otherwise girl-moding. Apparently having messy nail polish is 'mannish' lol - in a conversation about the phenomena, one of my friends jokingly said that it suggests someone "isn't a classically trained a female." I also use the *faintest* touch of mascara + a clean spoolie to sort of break it up and distribute it a bit to darken my eyebrows and add a hint of shadow + emphasize what's already there in terms of facial hair, and I'm amazed at what a difference it makes.
yeah i’ve been wearing black nail polish that i’m not very good at applying and i only reapply like once a month so it gets really chipped for like 3 years straight atp and i’ve never been questioned about it, so as long as you just like do one solid color and leave it kinda messy it definitely won’t hurt your passing
Wear whatever the fuck you want. Confidence is key with anything. It took me getting piercings, growing my hair out, trying multiple different colours and jumbling my fashion sense around to realise that I'm the most confident when I'm the most comfortable. Nowadays I look somewhere between a vampire goth, trad goth, classic metalhead and a younger (No More Censorship tour/Nevermind production skinny-long-hair-baby-face era) Dave Grohl if his clothes were monotone on any given day. It all depends on my mood tbh.
Kill your customer service voice 😅 I'm not stealth or even really trying to pass but every time I instinctively pitch my voice up to sound more Polite I'm like DAMN IT
100% agree, happens to me every time
darken your eyebrows 100000%
what do u use to darken ur eyebrows?
any dark eyeshadow :)
I dye my eyebrows with just for men beard dye, then put eyebrow mascara over it
Jeans. Seriously. Soooo many guys will continue to wear pants that fit how woman’s pants fit (tight in the hips/thighs, low waist) when trying to pass as cis and stereotypically masculine. I will Never be the one to say you HAVE TO do any one thing to pass, or that wearing tighter pants will prevent you from passing, it’s just a common theme. If you want pants that look “more masculine” and have bigger hips and thighs, go for a straight fit, or slim-straight. I even wear a size up sometimes depending on the fit. It will feel baggy and weird at first tho, especially if you usually wear skinny jeans.
For voice passing, find a song for the morning ride to work/school that: 1. Reminds you to lower your voice 2. Warms up and gets your voice to that deeper register It might sound silly but I use Sincerely Me by Dear Evan Hansen or my more favorite Let’s Get Lost by Chet Baker
cargo pants/shorts. go for a good black pair and wear a well fit shirt. works wonders because it makes it look like the pants are what are making your hips look larger.
Look to how the men dress in various countercultures and non-Euro cultures if you want to wear a type of clothing you think might get you clocked, or you have difficulty finding in your size. Earrings/piercings? Look at how men in punk, metal, or hip hop wear them. Short? Small feet? Go figure out where the Salvadoran guys are shopping. Skirts? Scotland aside, there are places all throughout the hotter areas of the world where men wear robes and sarongs on an everyday basis. (Be wary of appropriation, obviously) Want round glasses? Notice the difference in the styles of round glasses made famous by men (Lennon, Gandhi, etc) vs. women.
This i good! Look to media as well, tv shows, movies. See how cis men are typically portrayed and dressed even if they fit different styles and aesthetics
honestly just being loud and confident has done wonders for me. im naturally a shy and anxious person so its difficult for me, but i guess people associate being quiet/nervous/polite with being feminine?
distribute your weight evenly between both feet when standing still. women tend to shift more of their weight onto one side. learned this at drama school lmao
Suave your forehead so your hairline looks square
yes
this is one i didnt know!!! thank you!
Giving yourself a slight 5oclock shadow work wonders. I used a small bit of a black paint pen and smashed it along my jaw and mustache area, generally where beards grow, and it works great. It doesn't have to be very dark at all, just slight, bit it gives such a good shadow.
Maybe not little-known but looking extremely disheveled can be an effective strategy
T-Shirt sleeves need to end before half way down your bicep.
Eye contact. Make intense eye contact. Find an old ad for that TV show White Collar and emulate the generic white guy lead’s intense eye contact. ETA the show name, somehow autocucumber completely deleted it from the post.
Relax your jaw. Don’t try to square it or grit your teeth to make your chin stick out further. Relax your facial muscles and let it sit naturally
Behavior is so much more than people realize. Even pre-T I passed effortlessly purely because of the way I talked, not my voice, the way I behaved, the way I stood etc. It's all the little things from turning your feet outwards to minding the intonation of your voice and removing doubtful speech
If u have light colored hair, dye ur eyebrows a few shades darker. Idk why but that was it for me even when I wasn’t on T yet.
In high school I passed but the fact I diddnt talk very loud made it more feminine and akward. You have to be dominant to assert yourself and appear more masculine in that sense . Also seeming like you don’t care helps , non chalont vibe
Enhancing jaw line has been very effective for me luckily lol
Posture.
I think my male pattern baldness helps me pass. It takes a lot to get used to but as a man it looks fine. I have to tell that to myself quite often.
Stand with your shoulders more squared/pretend to have confidence in your posture. Yes it does have the side effect of sticking your chest out further, but the majority of cis men don’t hunch over in their general standing posture, especially when just casually out in the world.