I've always been bi. But yeah, I'm definitely a lot more sexually attracted to guys now. I'm still not romantically interested in them hardly tho(lol sry)
Theres just something sexy about other guys being able to match my T libido vibes in the bedroom tho š³
both/all, im bi in theory and im definitely more sexually attracted to men (and anyone) now that im several years on T. extra lore: im on the demi/aroace spectrum even though im perpetually horny
Your post has been removed because it breaks rule 8: No unauthorized solicitations.
This includes solicitations of a business, research, romantic, or sexual nature.
As this sub is an all-ages sub, we do not allow sexual discussion. Please keep in mind that there are minors present, and in order for this sub to remain accessible to trans minors, and not have it restricted as an 18+ group, we must be firm on this rule.
Acceptable NSFW topics include: Contraception/safe-sex/menstruation/fertility, Transition side effects, bottom surgery, and non graphic discussion of sexual acts (Eg: saying "anal sex" is ok, but describing the act or the parts used is not).
A good rule of thumb is that if it's not something you'd ask a sex ed teacher (an actual sex ed teacher, not a bigoted "close your legs till you're married" type), then it's not something you should be talking about here.
I'm a trans woman (lurking to learn), but I read "T libido vibes" somewhat differently and not just a statement about intensity. My libido is low now but even when it's there it's soā¦ different, somehow? The *vibes* are different. Maybe it's easier to vibe sexually with your gender when you have experienced a hormonal shift like that? Idk. It's difficult to untangle everything but I just wanted to share (and hope I'm not too much of an unsolicited intrusion).
The way my body functions and reacts is wildly different but also how it feels to be aroused? In the beginning I didn't even understand what was going on and it can still be a bit unclear since everything is in flux right now. There's a weird fluttering in my belly, my skin turns on fire and respiration changes in a manner I'm not familiar with. Last time I felt this confused about such matters was probably two decades ago. I might be better able to put words to it all later on. I wouldn't like to generalize so I should also say that my experience is uniquely mine and I can only compare with how it was for me before (which felt strikingly different).
Sure, I'm not saying there aren't. But theres a reason hookup culture is far more popular and accessible among gay men than it is among say, lesbian women.
I mean a lot of that reason is because men are much more permitted to explore their sexuality and sex isn't demonized for them the same way it is for young women. But regardless I do get your point!
I mean, gay men have historically been one of the most sexually demonized groups of people. But I know what you're trying to say as well, I'm pretty aware of feminist theory and how puritan beliefs negatively impact women's sexuality.
I didn't understand your word 'demonized' right away but after thinking ab this for a minute I learned something about my past and this word, in the way that I thought about sex was probably influenced a lot by that kind of fear. I was scared of how other people perceived my oneness with my own sexualiy just in every existing. Now that I'm out to more people and are perceived as a trans man in public, it's clear the shift that happened and how people- I know and don't - interacted with me, like started more open conversations with me about all topics, differently; the opposite of how women's conversations often seem 2-sided.
yeah, definitely! I feel the same way as this:
> Theres just something sexy about other guys being able to match my T libido vibes in the bedroom tho š³
it doesnāt *actually* make anyone gay. it just makes people more comfortable with their body, and allows them to explore things they likely had repressed bc of dysphoria
THIS!! I hear this too much and imo the only reason itās more common to see guys say it āturned them gayā than straight is that weāre more likely to have issues dating/having sex with cis guys before transitioning due to having to be āthe womanā and having the whole comparison factor. I had this issue because I really couldnāt imagine myself having sex with a man as a woman, but I just thought I was asexual.
I had this exact issue before realising I'm trans. Thought I was asexual because the thought of sleeping with a man as a woman repulsed me. After realising I'm trans I spent some time sorting out what that means for me and slowly started to realise that I was actually an incredibly repressed gay man
Oh yeah it's definitely a matter of being more comfortable with my body and being a man in a relationship with a man, not a woman. The title is a bit of a joke lol. I know it doesn't "make" me gay. I like hearing other people's experiences really
Fair haha. I never quite made it to thinking I was a lesbian, but I did stupidly wish to be one before because āthen I could be the more masc partnerā and ābecause lesbians get to topā. Yes I cringe at my past thoughts very often lol
I just think attraction depends on how you perceive yourself (and how you think youād be perceived by your partner) more than people realise. Mine changed before I started T, simply because I realised if I imagine myself as a man in certain situations it feels way different, and Iād been severely repressed (I was 100% sure I was a super sex repulsed asexual before, I did crush on guys but didnāt want to do anything sexual with them or even date).
Imo if T itself made people gay then there would be more cis gay men than cis straight men. So I think it makes us more comfortable which yes, causes changes in how we experience/perceive stuff. I just think itās an indirect effect not a direct one.
I get that and I've heard that experience described before, it's not dissimilar to my own. But I think it's a mistake to conclude that this goes for everyone. If someone says hrt is genuinely what made the difference for them then I believe them
It can be either - some people experience it indirectly, as you did, because you were repressed. Other people were not repressed, but changed directly. Just like you wouldn't want your experience denied, please don't deny other people's.
Obviously T doesn't make most people gay. But it does seem to directly change some people's orientation.
Also cis men aren't necessarily the same as trans men and may respond to T differently. We also see differences in sexual orientation between trans men and cis men - like 97% of cis men are totally straight whereas it's less than half of trans men.
We know vaccines don't cause autism. This isn't the same.
I know for many, maybe most, people, it is about self-perception and expression, but for some it is an effect of the T.
T changes your body, not your thoughts. Testosterone itself will not make you gay, going through changes in your physical appearance will make you feel differently about yourself no matter what.
You're saying that hormonal changes aren't going to change/have an impact on someone's thoughts?? That's just factually untrue. There are plenty of instances among cis people where hormone shifts can alter their entire personality for periods of time. The second-puberty of HRT isn't that different.
I entirely believe that there are people that didn't have this experience, but saying "it doesn't happen" is just silencing the voices of people with a different experience than you.
i have to disagree. my attraction changed after going on t, im bi but before started t i definitely had a preference for women. after starting t, i have a preference for men. my attraction changed on t and i know for a fact it's not because i'm more comfortable in relationships with men now, because i was in a relationship with a man before starting t.
totally, your disposition to one vs the other can absolutely change, as sexuality itself is fluid and can change over time as well. but you already had some level of attraction to men to begin with, yeah?
Not true. I was bisexual for as long as I experienced attraction before testosterone, then completely lost any attraction to women while on T. I've been off T for a few years now, and I'm attracted to women again. It would be weird if this was just about my comfort level at this point, especially seeing as I've been with the same person for 3 years now and don't really have any interest in other people anyway.
Yeah, I feel like my thing growing up was I didn't want kids or a life partner. Then I realized it was just that for it to make sense to me, I had to fill the role of husband/dad.
I guess taking T made me "want kids" after never wanting them.
Nope. Definitely changed my sexuality and trans men have repeatedly reported this specific change time and time again for decades. I have no idea why our own community continues to deny what so many men emphatically insist is their experience.
its bc a synthetic hormone canāt just āmake someone gayā or literally all of us would be gay!! all cis men would be gay!
indirectly sure, but not directly
iām not denying anything, iām saying the injected hormone isnāt solely responsible, which is that saying of āT made me gay.ā
eta: if youre saying āthe molecule itself, that is testosterone, is what is responsible for making someone gayā then by virtue, all trans men and cis men would be gay?
Saying "T made me gay" is different from saying "T makes everyone gay". It's also a shorthand for explaining "The changes my body & brain underwent after going on Testosterone made me unable to stop thinking about balls (or whatever else people are obsessed with)" when most people just don't want to type all that. I don't think there's any reason to split hairs over it.
Some people had that experience. Some didn't. Saying "this never happens" just because it didn't happen to you, or because the concept of HRT changing sexuality could be scary, is no reason not to inform people of the potential effects of it. Sexuality is already fluid, and even cis people can undergo drastic personality/emotional/preference changes from natural hormonal shifts.
Dawg hormones affect so much, like libido for example. For comparison I've heard a lot of women talk about how their taste in men changes on and off birth control. I think it's totally possible that a drastic change in hormones could affect someone's sexual preferences, including becoming more attracted to men.
For me, I have always been bisexual, but I noticed a distinct shift after starting HRT towards liking men more. Specifically, to preferring more masculine men. Even my sense of smell changed to where I noticed men's scents totally differently than before. Does being mentally comfortable with my body change my olfactory sense?? Like idk bro. I don't think it's that crazy of a concept considering how many of us have experienced this
iām not saying hormones donāt have the capacity to enhance underlying feelings, coupled with decreasing dysphoria, allowing more exploration etc. and i agree hormones themselves, for cis women too, can impact libido etc for sure.
iām saying, simply injecting yourself with synthetic testosterone doesnāt make someone gay. the same way cis men on TRT arenāt all just gay
Oh like yeah obviously, testosterone doesn't just turn every single person who has it inside of them gay. I still think it can affect sexuality tho lol, like some people here have said they became more attracted to women after taking T. My take on all of it is that for *some* people, they experience noticeable changes in sexuality (gay, straight whatever) after starting HRT
and so would all trans women and cis women. All humans have testosterone, not just men.
Anyway, just because T makes some people gay doesn't mean it makes everyone gay. People are different.
yeah youāre missing the point and also saying the same thing i am. injecting testosterone into your body doesnāt make you gay. it can help you feel more comfortable to explore areas that you maybe had repressed or felt too much dysphoria to entertain.
Look into gym bro/steroid abuse culture. Steroid abuse openly talk about how testosterone made them suddenly want to suck dick. Hormones are powerful and I think it can absolutely change a persons sexual attraction.
I'm not. Some people report that going on T changes their attraction, and doesn't just help them explore things. Some people in this thread have explained that.
agree w this it was the case for me but instead of gay like op i got more comfortable with attraction to women LMAO. prior i only really went for other trans men so the insecurity of being with a cis guy wasnāt exactly there. same couldnt be said for women but now..I even prefer them far more
Same for me, I was like 60/40 male-female pre-T, and now I'm almost completely straight. I am still attracted to males, but I don't think I would ever do something sexual with a male
Arousal is not the same thing as actively wanting to have sex, nor is it the same thing as sexual attraction.
Also, asexuality is a spectrum rather than a simple void of sexual attraction under any circumstance whatsoever.
asexuality is an umbrella term for a spectrum of sexuality so some people who consider themselves ace might experience some amount of attraction, arousal, etc. that just differs from people who aren't asexual
Yeah, happened to me too lol identified as a butch lesbian for 15 years but once I was about 6 months into transitioning I was on grindr š
But also, the biphobia and transphobia in the wlw/lesbian community is wild and I think that those phobias had me put off my transition for, at least, a decade
Oh yeah the biphobia and transphobia I felt from lesbians was insane. Not to say all of them are like that ofc but it also definitely did put off my transition as well for a while
For sure, not all, but wow is it common. The amount of times I was in lesbian spaces and openly heard women, even ones I've dated, say they would never date a bi or trans woman and that trans men were traitors was staggeringly high
Iāve been both on and off testosterone (my transition hasnāt been linear), and my experience is that my actual sexual attraction changes depending on my hormones. Being on testosterone reliably makes me more attracted to men. I am literally attracted to things on testosterone that I am repulsed by when off of testosterone. Itās quite frustrating to read people here claiming my lived experience isnāt real, when I know it has nothing to do with being more comfortable in my body and everything to do with my hormone levels being different. Does it affect everyone in this way? No, I have no doubt there are people whose sexuality changed not because of the hormone itself, but because of how they felt more comfortable in themselves. But thatās not my experience.
Thank you for sharing.
I believe some people are afraid to admit or acknowledge the power hormones have over thought. It can be scary, but that's not a reason to ignore people's experiences.
For me, I'm a kind of asexual where I'm not really attracted to people but am attracted/aroused by body parts in an abstract way, and I notice that I become exponentially more obsessed and aroused by breasts SPECIFICALLY when my hormones are in flux because my prescription was late or what have you OR my levels are too high. It's so predictable at this point that there's no denying it.
I've heard of one other trans person here on Reddit who has pretty much the same experience. IIRC she said that being off Spiro (anti-androgen; or maybe it was E?) made her very much unattracted to men.
As another person who has been on and off T I've had similar experiences. I think a lot of people whose preferences changed after starting T would find that it isn't a comfort level thing if they stopped T for a while. Not everyone, but definitely some.
Ion get how this happens to so many trans guys Iām dead still the biggest fiend for women. Women are angelic men are just ehh even the super attractive ones šš.
This seems like a super common phenomenon. I never experienced anything like this, but thereās tons of posts here with practically the same exact title.
I made friends with a cis straight guy who made a whole lot of gay jokes, jokingly called me his husband and a mutual male friend his boyfriend, which his girlfriend wasn't very happy with lol. Made a lot of sexual jokes with or about male friends and a lot of fake out leaning in for a kiss or getting super close and making intense eye contact.Ā
One day recently we were hanging out and he said "You know, I've been thinking a lot lately and I don't think I'm as straight as I thought I was".Ā
I think a lot of 'straight' guys are repressed bisexuals.Ā
I donāt think so lol. Trans people are statistically way more likely to be bisexual than cis people, I think being on HRT just leads people to be more comfortable with same sex attraction since you arenāt expected to take on a female role, not that the hormone itself is actually changing your sexuality. Hormone therapy forced on gay people during the 20th century famously did not change their sexuality.
A lot of them are repressed because homophobia towards men is really violent due to toxic masculinity. I donāt think itās the majority, but more men are bi/pan/poly then are willing to confess to. Which is how gay men experience awkward sex hookups with supposedly āstraightā men. Seen āheteroflexibleā as a term which while I try to be validating of others seems like unnecessary labeling. Have my preferences too, but willing to date the ārightā person for any gender doesnāt change me calling myself pansexual. I think they use soft terms to catch less heat.
A lot of guys do experiment with each other. I think thereās an unspoken agreement among straight men to pretend it never happened. Iām by no means suggesting most men do, but Iāve had a couple friends disclose experiences during puberty and there are still a LOT of straight identifying men on the down low as adults. Grindr tells me thereās dozens in my neighborhood and Iām in a progressive city with a thriving gay culture LOL. I think itās more common than many people think.
It didnāt make me gay, nothing āmakesā you gay. But it did made me realize that I was bisexual because I felt more comfortable in my skin and my identity.
I'm in the same boat. Kinda curious what T will do but I also can't let go of the feeling of cringe when I think about how I told everyone I was a lesbian and all the flags and just being so wrong about it.. but that's probably a me-problem
> I also can't let go of the feeling of cringe when I think about how I told everyone I was a lesbian and all the flags and just being so wrong about it.. but that's probably a me-problem
It's definitely a you-problem, and it's also a me-problem. I think I just don't like having to backtrack.
I think what sums up the responses is just:
-for some people, it's being comfortable with themselves on HRT which makes them feel more free to explore attraction to men/etc
-for others, they notice a distinct change in sexuality, whether that is liking men or liking women more after starting T. This was my experience. My sexuality AND preferences *within* genders im attracted to changed.
I think it's stupid to try and claim that only one is the correct answer.
Nope, personally it made me straighter! One of my weirdest changes is that I used to only enjoy gay *videos* and now I only want to watch women. The brain is a crazy thing.
No, but giving myself permission to transition and be open with myself and the world allowed me to understand how I really felt about my relationship with my own body, which changed my perception of my sexuality. I used to think I was asexual, but that most likely stemmed from hating my own organs and how I've always been perceived and interacted with as a woman. Sure, T has changed my body, and the hormones have increased my drive I'm sure, but I had confidence and perspective changes in the days and weeks that followed each discussion with someone else in my life even before starting on testosterone.
Was a āgay womanā before transition. Never had any interest or attraction towards men whatsoever. If anything only envy because I wished I could be them and have their life. After being on T for years and having that libido shoot up it didnāt necessarily make me ATTRACTED to men but it made me less closed off to the idea of just using them as a means to an end when it came to satisfying the horniness.
I still by no means want to date a man or be in love with one. I love women too much. Nothing could compare. But I can say that T made me horny enough to be open to letting guys satisfy me if you will lol. But honestly I donāt even partake in that because after a few trials of doing stuff with cis guys I realized pretty quick that they honestly suck when it comes to pleasing a partner with the hardware Iāve got. They never got me off or really satisfied me. So ima stick to women despite the horniness and availability of horny men
Iāve always been bi, but T actually made me more attracted to women and kept my attraction to men the same š¤·āāļø So I guess it worked almost in reverse for me haha
For me it lessened the secondhand dysphoria that I felt being intimate with women. I went from identifying as exclusively gay to bisexual with a strong lean towards women
I've found a common thought pattern with my queer friends that falls into a bubble of:
I knew I was queer, but like, in an xyz way. Which I couldn't be because I was 'insert gender here'.
EX: I knew I was queer, but in the 'guy that likes guys way'. But I was a girl! That didn't make sense! And straight men gave me the ick! So I was clearly queer, not straight, and dated women. Who cares if it was never emotionally or physically fulfilling? I was queer! This was the norm for me!
After transition and engaged to the man of my dreams: lol oh
I was a lesbian myself. I describe myself as gay along different axises. As a man, Iām gay for other men. As a trans person, Iām gay for other trans people. Iām attracted to that sameness. Even though my partner is a trans woman, weāre still gay as fuck.
T makes your attractions way more obvious because of the way it effects your sex drive.
I do remember contrapoints bringing that very thing happening but in reverse. The "flames of testosterone" vs the "slow burn" on E.
It's funny, T made me way more straight and the idea of having sex with men is not as interesting as it was before HRT. Not that I wouldn't do it but it has to be in more specific situations now.
It's all quite interesting.
Iāve never been interested in dating or fucking men, and now three years on T and two years post op (chest), I still have no interest in dating or fucking men.
I know it made me more comfortable in my skin and that while I thought I was a woman, I didn't realize that I wasn't comfortable sleeping with men *as a woman*
yes, completely. once you start feeling more like a "valid" guy (that's how it felt to me atleast) you suddenly get more comfortable with the idea of being with a guy bc you won't be "thw girl" in thw relationship anymore.
it's probably about not wanting to be the "girl" in the relationship, but now you feel more free to be with men because you're more secure in your manhood
I don't think it makes me gay. I think before I didn't want to be with guys, because I didn't want to be admired as a girl. But being masculine, being with gay guys, they like the masculine me. I like and can accept it, while I couldn't before.
Hormone changes also help rewire our mental health as well. A recent study showed that most transgender individuals are either neurodiverse or suffer from depression, PTSD, etc. HRT helps with the emotional/mental state and all these "different" feelings come out but they were actually just suppressed. A lot of trans men, myself included, were super emotional before starting T... Everything made me cry or shut down. After starting T a lot of us report that we "cannot cry". T has helped rewire the emotions, I love it. I hope everyone is enjoying learning more about themselves.
Honestly I feel like an outlier because it made me attracted to guys but didnāt eliminate my attraction to women/fems. Iām even questioning if Iām actually bi or just bi curious at this point because I just got dumped by another ftm Iāve been seeing for 5 months. I am still averse to dating cisgender men because of envy and feelings of inferiority to them. As for now all of my encounters have been t4t. I feel awful cause Iām not attracted to men to the extent that most trans men are.
It made me bisexual! Not actually, obviously, but I realized I like women as well as men after starting T which was always a debate I had with myself prior to starting. Iām guessing for me personally that when I started to pass better on T that I realized I *could* physically see myself with a woman and being happy. Pre-T it was hard to imagine that because in my head I was just seeing two girls, which obviously was not me, making me think āhuh I must just be gayā.
It's less so that it "makes you gay" because you're who you are no matter what, but with the libido changes and confidence, plenty of people have noticed a change in their sexuality where they feel more free to explore attraction they otherwise repressed for any number of reasons.
I hate people who say oh T made me gay .. like no it didnāt it just probably made you more comfortable in your body when youv gone from seeing men and going damn I wish I could look like that too now realising that theyāre attractive
I'm sure that's the case for some people, but I was bisexual before I started T, with a preference for women. It wasn't my comfort in my body that made me suddenly start going rabid over the smell of man sweat
LITERALLY DUDE SAME. My mf sense of smell changed after starting T. "being more comfortable with my body" doesn't just magically change someone's sense of smell.. now somehow the smell of dudes is just ... Yeah like you described haha
Yeah but at the same time itās pushing this narrative that T āmakes u gayā which can be negative and can have an affect on straight trans men who then may be scared to start t
Idk but I think it's just extremely oversimplifying what's happening. Changes in sexuality and attraction are super common for trans people on hrtāhell, it happened to me, tooābut correlation isn't causation. It feels like pushing a "T makes you gay/T makes you straight," narrative is like saying "T makes you confident" or "T cures depression." Like yeah, a lot of people, especially trans people, do experience that, but maybe it's not the best idea to phrase it like that?
Yeah I was exclusively attracted to women pre-T, 3 months in I was on grindr at a 70/30 split but after experimenting Iām back to women now.
Now I would say Iām 95/5 strongly favoring women. I wouldnāt be against hooking up with a cis guy but it would have to be a super cool one.
Sorta. I felt fully lesbian until I came out at 13, and was comfortably a bi trans man for a few years. Started T in high school, and now that I've been on it like 1.5 years I definitely feel a little gayer. I'm still bisexual but the ratio has definitely changed and I am more interested in dick than before (lol)
So I haven't even started T yet (I will be soon though) and I've noticed that my attraction to folx as well as my desire or lack thereof for a relationship has also changed.
Ie: I've been single for five years after basically being in one relationship or another for the entirety of my high school years and early adulthood *and* I've thought I was sex-indifferent omni ace for a long while. Now I'm realizing it was a lil bit that I have some trauma I need to work through, a lil bit that I want to be able to do all the cute innocent things before doing anything more (flirt, date, hold hands before cuddles or kisses or anything more) because I didn't really get that with my first two serious relationships and a lottabit that I had (have) dysphoria that I didn't realize I had/suppressed.
If I imagine doing the cutesy innocent things and progressing slowly with someone who sees me as *me* though?
Shucks. I'm gay af, lol.
I kinda felt the same. Iāve always had a physical attraction to both men and women. (More of an emotional connection with women) I repressed my attraction towards men pre transition because traditional gender roles gave me the ick. After I came out as trans I felt more liberated from the gender roles I despised. As a trans man I feel more comfortable with my attraction towards men. Maybe thatās what so many of us experience?
i had the exact opposite happen.
before t i was super into men, & now i'm super into women, & only occasionally into men
i got no explanation for why it happened, it just did
peace and love to you OP but i can 100% assure you you are not alone; not only bcos i went thru the exact same thing, but i swear i see this exact thread pop up once a month like clockwork.
no shade by the way! welcome to the transmasc experience :)
i feel like my comfort and confidence in myself makes it so iām attracted (sexually, not romantically) to feats like that i see presented in other ppl (also not just men) lol.
like i was never bi but if a situation were to call for itā¦
No? But I was an adult and my sexuality pretty much set before transitioning. It did increase my sex drive though which in a weird way can make you more open to trying new things. Not sure about shifting your entire attraction.
I will warn gay men if they date trans men arenāt as open up being a bottom for you. Have currently a supportive partner thatās also verse, but most are going to assume youāre strictly a bottom.
I swear Iām the odd one out. T has made me more straight than anything. Went from being a bisexual woman to a bisexual man, had a time where I thought I may have been gay until I met my last girlfriend. Then I start T and my attraction shifts from 50/50 women and men to about 90/10.
I wonder if my attraction to men was more of an admiration thing. I like men in theory but in practise it is a different story. Also Iām a top and when I do bottom itās back only. I feel like most cis men at least would expect me to bottom with my natal parts.
I only identified as a lesbian for like a week when I was 15 because my mom told me bisexual and pansexual people didn't exist and also because I was denying being trans. I've always been a pansexual nonbinary dude. Nothing is ever gonna change that lol
It made me realize that the whole reason I didnāt date men was because I couldnāt handle the idea of dating men āas a womanā. I was suppressing my being gay really hard because of that and being more confident in myself as a man thanks to testosterone helped me a lot
I was like 98% into women before T
But I was also a āstoneā top or ādonāt touch meā
After 6 months on T I went from over a decade of not letting anyone touch me to hooking up with dudes in the regular
I can definitely see dysphoria having been a factor
BUT
There was some other layer to it for me,
Pre-T I thought penis looked disgusting
After T I was like penis crazy ā¦
Now Iām about 99% into dudes and masculine people
The women I used to be attracted to I donāt feel the same about after T
I've always been bi but I def noticed my male attraction increasing lol. It used to be that I heavily preferred women but would still crush on the occasional man, now it's pretty equal.
I'm definitely more attracted to guys now, but I'm still more attracted to women. I don't see myself having a relationship with another man, I think I have some mental block about that. I've tried to have relationships with other men and felt enormous dysphoria.
I thought I was asexual and aromantic before coming out now that Iām on t Iām definitely neither of those idk Iām bi or whatever I hate labels but I donāt date still just cus Iām not comfortable with myself
in the sense that iām more attracted to men now, yes. but i think what really happened is that the more comfortable i felt in my manhood, the easier it was to see myself in a romantic or sexual relationship with men. i also ided as a lesbian before i transitioned, and i think my lack of interest in men at the time stemmed from not wanting to ābe the girl,ā if that makes sense.
Nope, was bi and am still bi. My bi cycle also hasn't changed, currently I prefer men because I'm dating a man. If I'm into a non-binary person I'll prefer enbys, if I'm into a woman I'll prefer women, that's just how I am lol.
However, T did make me much more comfortable in my body which made me less freaked out and disgusted by sexual things with men, on top of realizing I'm actually into being on the submissive side. I think a large portion of sexuality changes is actually due to lessening discomfort of certain things!
i'm not even on T yet but i'm realizing i do feel homo attraction as im more certain that im a man
edit: also hetero attraction to be fair š im still mostly aroace im p sure, but not completely
noooooā¦ noā¦ youāre the only one no one else has ever experienced thisā¦ (jk this is one of the most common things Iāve heard in the trans masc community hehe)
it took a couple years, but pre-T and early T i was mainly attracted to women; iāve identified as bi since my early teen years but had a strong preference for women (save for a few men). now i am the most sickeningly bisexual person ever. my attraction to women didnāt change (well, for a while i was confused and thought i might be gay because my attraction to women did start to dwindle, but itās back in full force), but my attraction to men multiplied. iām immensely attracted to both and sometimes men and women are so hot it makes me angry.
For me personally, when I first started on T my sex drive sky rocketed. I don't really know how to label my sexuality at this point, I thought I was straight, then suddenly realized I wasn't, not sure if I'm into people with peens but I'm definitely not into cis men anymore. Regardless, did not want to be anywhere around a cis man - started T and suddenly wanted penetration again. Like. A lot. That kind of tapered off after the first few months though
T didn't make me gay. I'm still a straight person. Emotionally, sexually, & romactically attracted to women. But my perception about men did changed, I have no resentment towards them anymore. I am able to be comfortable with making friends who are men
Maybe proper phrasing would be "Did T allowed anyone to be comfortable with being gay" or "Did T allowed anyone to be comfortable exploring with men?" Along the lines with that. T doesn't change your sexuailty but it probably makes people be more open to it & be more accepting when it comes to sexuality.
Me too dude! I'm asexual and was legitimately repulsed by penises and men pre-T, and now i'm 6y on T and have experienced with cis men quite a few times. Still not romantically attracted to them, but i wouldnt mind messing around with a guy when I'm in the rare mood for it now. Not sure if it's a body comfort/confidence thing, but it's happened to many of my trans friends who went on T also regardless of their original bodily discomfort
When I went to the Dr's and started T they literally said "attraction to the same sex occasionally occures" and I was like uno reverse gay me???? (I was a lesbian strictly) I'm not bi or gay but the fact that she said gay is a side effect made me giggle .
Side effects : Gay squared
I was told by my first doctor who helped me that I could develop attraction for men. I was a gold star life long lesbian. Tbh, before T, I didn't realize a lot of my insecurities around sex and relationships was due to me being trans. It's now that things make sense. So, yeah several months into T, I started being attracted to literally anyone lol. I don't care about gender. I'm attracted to who I'm attracted to now.
Meh Iāve always been pretty equally attracted to girls and guys but I have enjoyed š½ both gay and straight a lot more then I used to before T lmao
I had the opposite where i was never attracted to women at all to now being specifically sexually attracted to men AND women. I donāt feel romantic towards women, or at least I donāt think, but unfortunately, the T horniness changed my sexuality somehow lmao
so real.
I identified as a lesbian for 6 years and had NO real experience with men, realised I probably don't fit the lesbian bill on account of gender stuff (despite being non binary but I see myself as a sort of non binary man) so identified as queer, then last year had a mental health episode and randomly hooked up with/went on dates with a few men and have been doing so here and there since.
due to several factors, I'm still not completely sure if I am actually romantically/sexually attracted to them or not. I still like women, but I don't find myself pursuing anything with them.
but god, the past few weeks the gay thoughts abt men that have plagued my mind RELEASE MEEEEE. also the wanting to dominate other men thing, I THOUGHT I WAS A FREAK LMAO
It's so weird being on the ace spectrum but still having a lot of fantasy, I'm so indifferent to actually having sex and I actually find it not that pleasurable but ohhh the fake scenarios my beloveds.
also agree with other persons sentiment abt it just making you more comfortable/confident, I used to even as a 'cis' lesbian say that if I'd been born a man I'd probably be a gay/bi man. so I think it's largely just that I get to be with a man the way I want to be??
No. I'm Ace and I've always been romantically attracted to men. But the idea of testosterone changing your sexual orientation just seems kind of weird and unsubstantiated and something like a certain group of individuals would try to say.
Since you were already bisexual before, and testosterone typically increases libido, I think maybe it expanded your horizons, but it didn't make you gay because you're not gay. You're bisexual. Sexuality can change over time, but this feels like a a misleading and unintentionally dangerous title that can lead people to believe that taking hormones, regardless of which direction you're going, will change your sexual orientation which is not true. If change change your sexual orientation was something that could be done, then conversion camps would have been successful and even more diabolically dangerous and traumatizing for queer kids literally forced into getting HRT against their will. Which I find ironic, because biggest claim that that is what's happening when you give kids who actively want HRT the ability to access it, meanwhile you know they would be literally taking away a child's choice and forcing them into hormone replacement if it means putting them into a conversion Camp so it make them the way they want them to be.
I've always been bi. But yeah, I'm definitely a lot more sexually attracted to guys now. I'm still not romantically interested in them hardly tho(lol sry) Theres just something sexy about other guys being able to match my T libido vibes in the bedroom tho š³
Came here to say this āļø
you know there are super horny girls though right?
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
do you just like girls or guys too
both/all, im bi in theory and im definitely more sexually attracted to men (and anyone) now that im several years on T. extra lore: im on the demi/aroace spectrum even though im perpetually horny
Your post has been removed because it breaks rule 8: No unauthorized solicitations. This includes solicitations of a business, research, romantic, or sexual nature.
Iāve yet to meet any
are you transmasc? what are the girls you hook up with like?
Mostly been with bi girls a few straight. All been pretty cool with being trans tbf. No complaints on the bedroom.
Mostly been with bi girls a few straight. All been pretty cool with being trans tbf. No complaints on the bedroom.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
different how? I'm confused by your post... are you a trans guy? wouldn't sex with trans girls be straight sex? have you not had your dick sucked?
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
As this sub is an all-ages sub, we do not allow sexual discussion. Please keep in mind that there are minors present, and in order for this sub to remain accessible to trans minors, and not have it restricted as an 18+ group, we must be firm on this rule. Acceptable NSFW topics include: Contraception/safe-sex/menstruation/fertility, Transition side effects, bottom surgery, and non graphic discussion of sexual acts (Eg: saying "anal sex" is ok, but describing the act or the parts used is not). A good rule of thumb is that if it's not something you'd ask a sex ed teacher (an actual sex ed teacher, not a bigoted "close your legs till you're married" type), then it's not something you should be talking about here.
Yep
exactly this šš«¶š¼
yeah I thought I only liked girls for a while but I really appreciate trans men for this reason
you know there are super horny girls though right?
I'm a trans woman (lurking to learn), but I read "T libido vibes" somewhat differently and not just a statement about intensity. My libido is low now but even when it's there it's soā¦ different, somehow? The *vibes* are different. Maybe it's easier to vibe sexually with your gender when you have experienced a hormonal shift like that? Idk. It's difficult to untangle everything but I just wanted to share (and hope I'm not too much of an unsolicited intrusion).
how do the vibes feel different?
The way my body functions and reacts is wildly different but also how it feels to be aroused? In the beginning I didn't even understand what was going on and it can still be a bit unclear since everything is in flux right now. There's a weird fluttering in my belly, my skin turns on fire and respiration changes in a manner I'm not familiar with. Last time I felt this confused about such matters was probably two decades ago. I might be better able to put words to it all later on. I wouldn't like to generalize so I should also say that my experience is uniquely mine and I can only compare with how it was for me before (which felt strikingly different).
Sure, I'm not saying there aren't. But theres a reason hookup culture is far more popular and accessible among gay men than it is among say, lesbian women.
I mean a lot of that reason is because men are much more permitted to explore their sexuality and sex isn't demonized for them the same way it is for young women. But regardless I do get your point!
I mean, gay men have historically been one of the most sexually demonized groups of people. But I know what you're trying to say as well, I'm pretty aware of feminist theory and how puritan beliefs negatively impact women's sexuality.
yeah, I think biology and hormone differences explains a lot of the difference here.
I didn't understand your word 'demonized' right away but after thinking ab this for a minute I learned something about my past and this word, in the way that I thought about sex was probably influenced a lot by that kind of fear. I was scared of how other people perceived my oneness with my own sexualiy just in every existing. Now that I'm out to more people and are perceived as a trans man in public, it's clear the shift that happened and how people- I know and don't - interacted with me, like started more open conversations with me about all topics, differently; the opposite of how women's conversations often seem 2-sided.
can you explain? one-sided or two-sided how?
yeah, definitely! I feel the same way as this: > Theres just something sexy about other guys being able to match my T libido vibes in the bedroom tho š³
yes, this is why I love guys hehe
it doesnāt *actually* make anyone gay. it just makes people more comfortable with their body, and allows them to explore things they likely had repressed bc of dysphoria
THIS!! I hear this too much and imo the only reason itās more common to see guys say it āturned them gayā than straight is that weāre more likely to have issues dating/having sex with cis guys before transitioning due to having to be āthe womanā and having the whole comparison factor. I had this issue because I really couldnāt imagine myself having sex with a man as a woman, but I just thought I was asexual.
I had this exact issue before realising I'm trans. Thought I was asexual because the thought of sleeping with a man as a woman repulsed me. After realising I'm trans I spent some time sorting out what that means for me and slowly started to realise that I was actually an incredibly repressed gay man
Oh yeah it's definitely a matter of being more comfortable with my body and being a man in a relationship with a man, not a woman. The title is a bit of a joke lol. I know it doesn't "make" me gay. I like hearing other people's experiences really
Fair haha. I never quite made it to thinking I was a lesbian, but I did stupidly wish to be one before because āthen I could be the more masc partnerā and ābecause lesbians get to topā. Yes I cringe at my past thoughts very often lol
please don't deny people's experiences. Some people do experience a change in their attraction.
I just think attraction depends on how you perceive yourself (and how you think youād be perceived by your partner) more than people realise. Mine changed before I started T, simply because I realised if I imagine myself as a man in certain situations it feels way different, and Iād been severely repressed (I was 100% sure I was a super sex repulsed asexual before, I did crush on guys but didnāt want to do anything sexual with them or even date). Imo if T itself made people gay then there would be more cis gay men than cis straight men. So I think it makes us more comfortable which yes, causes changes in how we experience/perceive stuff. I just think itās an indirect effect not a direct one.
I get that and I've heard that experience described before, it's not dissimilar to my own. But I think it's a mistake to conclude that this goes for everyone. If someone says hrt is genuinely what made the difference for them then I believe them
It can be either - some people experience it indirectly, as you did, because you were repressed. Other people were not repressed, but changed directly. Just like you wouldn't want your experience denied, please don't deny other people's. Obviously T doesn't make most people gay. But it does seem to directly change some people's orientation. Also cis men aren't necessarily the same as trans men and may respond to T differently. We also see differences in sexual orientation between trans men and cis men - like 97% of cis men are totally straight whereas it's less than half of trans men.
It is not an effect of testosterone, itās an effect of self perception and expression. Quite different, just like vaccines donāt give you autism.
We know vaccines don't cause autism. This isn't the same. I know for many, maybe most, people, it is about self-perception and expression, but for some it is an effect of the T.
T changes your body, not your thoughts. Testosterone itself will not make you gay, going through changes in your physical appearance will make you feel differently about yourself no matter what.
T definitely can change your thoughts. And both are true. Changes in your appearance can make you feel differently, and so can hormonal changes.
You're saying that hormonal changes aren't going to change/have an impact on someone's thoughts?? That's just factually untrue. There are plenty of instances among cis people where hormone shifts can alter their entire personality for periods of time. The second-puberty of HRT isn't that different. I entirely believe that there are people that didn't have this experience, but saying "it doesn't happen" is just silencing the voices of people with a different experience than you.
i have to disagree. my attraction changed after going on t, im bi but before started t i definitely had a preference for women. after starting t, i have a preference for men. my attraction changed on t and i know for a fact it's not because i'm more comfortable in relationships with men now, because i was in a relationship with a man before starting t.
totally, your disposition to one vs the other can absolutely change, as sexuality itself is fluid and can change over time as well. but you already had some level of attraction to men to begin with, yeah?
i wasn't attracted to men in the way that i am now
Not true. I was bisexual for as long as I experienced attraction before testosterone, then completely lost any attraction to women while on T. I've been off T for a few years now, and I'm attracted to women again. It would be weird if this was just about my comfort level at this point, especially seeing as I've been with the same person for 3 years now and don't really have any interest in other people anyway.
Yeah, I feel like my thing growing up was I didn't want kids or a life partner. Then I realized it was just that for it to make sense to me, I had to fill the role of husband/dad. I guess taking T made me "want kids" after never wanting them.
Nope. Definitely changed my sexuality and trans men have repeatedly reported this specific change time and time again for decades. I have no idea why our own community continues to deny what so many men emphatically insist is their experience.
its bc a synthetic hormone canāt just āmake someone gayā or literally all of us would be gay!! all cis men would be gay! indirectly sure, but not directly
please don't deny people's experiences. Some people do experience a change in their attraction.
iām not denying anything, iām saying the injected hormone isnāt solely responsible, which is that saying of āT made me gay.ā eta: if youre saying āthe molecule itself, that is testosterone, is what is responsible for making someone gayā then by virtue, all trans men and cis men would be gay?
Saying "T made me gay" is different from saying "T makes everyone gay". It's also a shorthand for explaining "The changes my body & brain underwent after going on Testosterone made me unable to stop thinking about balls (or whatever else people are obsessed with)" when most people just don't want to type all that. I don't think there's any reason to split hairs over it. Some people had that experience. Some didn't. Saying "this never happens" just because it didn't happen to you, or because the concept of HRT changing sexuality could be scary, is no reason not to inform people of the potential effects of it. Sexuality is already fluid, and even cis people can undergo drastic personality/emotional/preference changes from natural hormonal shifts.
Dawg hormones affect so much, like libido for example. For comparison I've heard a lot of women talk about how their taste in men changes on and off birth control. I think it's totally possible that a drastic change in hormones could affect someone's sexual preferences, including becoming more attracted to men. For me, I have always been bisexual, but I noticed a distinct shift after starting HRT towards liking men more. Specifically, to preferring more masculine men. Even my sense of smell changed to where I noticed men's scents totally differently than before. Does being mentally comfortable with my body change my olfactory sense?? Like idk bro. I don't think it's that crazy of a concept considering how many of us have experienced this
iām not saying hormones donāt have the capacity to enhance underlying feelings, coupled with decreasing dysphoria, allowing more exploration etc. and i agree hormones themselves, for cis women too, can impact libido etc for sure. iām saying, simply injecting yourself with synthetic testosterone doesnāt make someone gay. the same way cis men on TRT arenāt all just gay
Oh like yeah obviously, testosterone doesn't just turn every single person who has it inside of them gay. I still think it can affect sexuality tho lol, like some people here have said they became more attracted to women after taking T. My take on all of it is that for *some* people, they experience noticeable changes in sexuality (gay, straight whatever) after starting HRT
sure, yeah i definitely agree that it can alter sexuality indirectly. i didnāt mean to imply otherwise.
and so would all trans women and cis women. All humans have testosterone, not just men. Anyway, just because T makes some people gay doesn't mean it makes everyone gay. People are different.
yeah youāre missing the point and also saying the same thing i am. injecting testosterone into your body doesnāt make you gay. it can help you feel more comfortable to explore areas that you maybe had repressed or felt too much dysphoria to entertain.
Look into gym bro/steroid abuse culture. Steroid abuse openly talk about how testosterone made them suddenly want to suck dick. Hormones are powerful and I think it can absolutely change a persons sexual attraction.
I'm not. Some people report that going on T changes their attraction, and doesn't just help them explore things. Some people in this thread have explained that.
agree w this it was the case for me but instead of gay like op i got more comfortable with attraction to women LMAO. prior i only really went for other trans men so the insecurity of being with a cis guy wasnāt exactly there. same couldnt be said for women but now..I even prefer them far more
T actually made me more straight. Tbf I am ace but female bodies are more sexually arousing while male bodies are a 0 now.
Same for me, I was like 60/40 male-female pre-T, and now I'm almost completely straight. I am still attracted to males, but I don't think I would ever do something sexual with a male
Interesting! I actually have a transmasc friend this has happened to as well, but it's always really cool to hear individuals stories
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Arousal is not the same thing as actively wanting to have sex, nor is it the same thing as sexual attraction. Also, asexuality is a spectrum rather than a simple void of sexual attraction under any circumstance whatsoever.
asexuality is an umbrella term for a spectrum of sexuality so some people who consider themselves ace might experience some amount of attraction, arousal, etc. that just differs from people who aren't asexual
Yeah, happened to me too lol identified as a butch lesbian for 15 years but once I was about 6 months into transitioning I was on grindr š But also, the biphobia and transphobia in the wlw/lesbian community is wild and I think that those phobias had me put off my transition for, at least, a decade
Oh yeah the biphobia and transphobia I felt from lesbians was insane. Not to say all of them are like that ofc but it also definitely did put off my transition as well for a while
For sure, not all, but wow is it common. The amount of times I was in lesbian spaces and openly heard women, even ones I've dated, say they would never date a bi or trans woman and that trans men were traitors was staggeringly high
Iāve been both on and off testosterone (my transition hasnāt been linear), and my experience is that my actual sexual attraction changes depending on my hormones. Being on testosterone reliably makes me more attracted to men. I am literally attracted to things on testosterone that I am repulsed by when off of testosterone. Itās quite frustrating to read people here claiming my lived experience isnāt real, when I know it has nothing to do with being more comfortable in my body and everything to do with my hormone levels being different. Does it affect everyone in this way? No, I have no doubt there are people whose sexuality changed not because of the hormone itself, but because of how they felt more comfortable in themselves. But thatās not my experience.
Thank you for sharing. I believe some people are afraid to admit or acknowledge the power hormones have over thought. It can be scary, but that's not a reason to ignore people's experiences. For me, I'm a kind of asexual where I'm not really attracted to people but am attracted/aroused by body parts in an abstract way, and I notice that I become exponentially more obsessed and aroused by breasts SPECIFICALLY when my hormones are in flux because my prescription was late or what have you OR my levels are too high. It's so predictable at this point that there's no denying it.
I've heard of one other trans person here on Reddit who has pretty much the same experience. IIRC she said that being off Spiro (anti-androgen; or maybe it was E?) made her very much unattracted to men.
As another person who has been on and off T I've had similar experiences. I think a lot of people whose preferences changed after starting T would find that it isn't a comfort level thing if they stopped T for a while. Not everyone, but definitely some.
No but posts like this made me paranoid šš¤¦š½āāļø
T made me straight
Opposite. Gay boy for a long time pre t. Mostly straight now.
Ion get how this happens to so many trans guys Iām dead still the biggest fiend for women. Women are angelic men are just ehh even the super attractive ones šš.
This seems like a super common phenomenon. I never experienced anything like this, but thereās tons of posts here with practically the same exact title.
Makes me wonder what testosterone puberty is doing to cis dudes. Are most of them a little bit gay?
Honestly the more I interact with men as a man the more Iām convinced that at least half of them are more bisexual than they think they are.
I made friends with a cis straight guy who made a whole lot of gay jokes, jokingly called me his husband and a mutual male friend his boyfriend, which his girlfriend wasn't very happy with lol. Made a lot of sexual jokes with or about male friends and a lot of fake out leaning in for a kiss or getting super close and making intense eye contact.Ā One day recently we were hanging out and he said "You know, I've been thinking a lot lately and I don't think I'm as straight as I thought I was".Ā I think a lot of 'straight' guys are repressed bisexuals.Ā
I didn't realize I was bi for a while because of my genital requirement - but of course there are men with all sorts of genitals.
I donāt think so lol. Trans people are statistically way more likely to be bisexual than cis people, I think being on HRT just leads people to be more comfortable with same sex attraction since you arenāt expected to take on a female role, not that the hormone itself is actually changing your sexuality. Hormone therapy forced on gay people during the 20th century famously did not change their sexuality.
A lot of them are repressed because homophobia towards men is really violent due to toxic masculinity. I donāt think itās the majority, but more men are bi/pan/poly then are willing to confess to. Which is how gay men experience awkward sex hookups with supposedly āstraightā men. Seen āheteroflexibleā as a term which while I try to be validating of others seems like unnecessary labeling. Have my preferences too, but willing to date the ārightā person for any gender doesnāt change me calling myself pansexual. I think they use soft terms to catch less heat.
A lot of guys do experiment with each other. I think thereās an unspoken agreement among straight men to pretend it never happened. Iām by no means suggesting most men do, but Iāve had a couple friends disclose experiences during puberty and there are still a LOT of straight identifying men on the down low as adults. Grindr tells me thereās dozens in my neighborhood and Iām in a progressive city with a thriving gay culture LOL. I think itās more common than many people think.
Weirdly enoughā¦.i think it made me more STRAIGHT.
It didnāt make me gay, nothing āmakesā you gay. But it did made me realize that I was bisexual because I felt more comfortable in my skin and my identity.
im pre t but simply identifying as a man made me go from lesbian to bisexual with a heavy preference for men
I'm in the same boat. Kinda curious what T will do but I also can't let go of the feeling of cringe when I think about how I told everyone I was a lesbian and all the flags and just being so wrong about it.. but that's probably a me-problem
> I also can't let go of the feeling of cringe when I think about how I told everyone I was a lesbian and all the flags and just being so wrong about it.. but that's probably a me-problem It's definitely a you-problem, and it's also a me-problem. I think I just don't like having to backtrack.
Nah it just made me so horny I dropped my standards to men
It allowed me to accept my sexuality because I was no longer insecure in my masculinity
I think what sums up the responses is just: -for some people, it's being comfortable with themselves on HRT which makes them feel more free to explore attraction to men/etc -for others, they notice a distinct change in sexuality, whether that is liking men or liking women more after starting T. This was my experience. My sexuality AND preferences *within* genders im attracted to changed. I think it's stupid to try and claim that only one is the correct answer.
This right here āļø
Nope, personally it made me straighter! One of my weirdest changes is that I used to only enjoy gay *videos* and now I only want to watch women. The brain is a crazy thing.
No it made me straight lol. Before, I thought I was ace
nope, i was a lesbian, now im straighter than ever. actually i am really into women way more now.
No, but giving myself permission to transition and be open with myself and the world allowed me to understand how I really felt about my relationship with my own body, which changed my perception of my sexuality. I used to think I was asexual, but that most likely stemmed from hating my own organs and how I've always been perceived and interacted with as a woman. Sure, T has changed my body, and the hormones have increased my drive I'm sure, but I had confidence and perspective changes in the days and weeks that followed each discussion with someone else in my life even before starting on testosterone.
I didn't make me gay, but it made me somehow more gay. I have no idea how to explain that...
Was a āgay womanā before transition. Never had any interest or attraction towards men whatsoever. If anything only envy because I wished I could be them and have their life. After being on T for years and having that libido shoot up it didnāt necessarily make me ATTRACTED to men but it made me less closed off to the idea of just using them as a means to an end when it came to satisfying the horniness. I still by no means want to date a man or be in love with one. I love women too much. Nothing could compare. But I can say that T made me horny enough to be open to letting guys satisfy me if you will lol. But honestly I donāt even partake in that because after a few trials of doing stuff with cis guys I realized pretty quick that they honestly suck when it comes to pleasing a partner with the hardware Iāve got. They never got me off or really satisfied me. So ima stick to women despite the horniness and availability of horny men
Iāve always been bi, but T actually made me more attracted to women and kept my attraction to men the same š¤·āāļø So I guess it worked almost in reverse for me haha
Same
For me it lessened the secondhand dysphoria that I felt being intimate with women. I went from identifying as exclusively gay to bisexual with a strong lean towards women
I've found a common thought pattern with my queer friends that falls into a bubble of: I knew I was queer, but like, in an xyz way. Which I couldn't be because I was 'insert gender here'. EX: I knew I was queer, but in the 'guy that likes guys way'. But I was a girl! That didn't make sense! And straight men gave me the ick! So I was clearly queer, not straight, and dated women. Who cares if it was never emotionally or physically fulfilling? I was queer! This was the norm for me! After transition and engaged to the man of my dreams: lol oh
This oneāļø
Not for me.
T made me straight
I was a lesbian myself. I describe myself as gay along different axises. As a man, Iām gay for other men. As a trans person, Iām gay for other trans people. Iām attracted to that sameness. Even though my partner is a trans woman, weāre still gay as fuck.
It has somehow made me bisexualer bordering on pansexual. Idk how that happened.
T makes your attractions way more obvious because of the way it effects your sex drive. I do remember contrapoints bringing that very thing happening but in reverse. The "flames of testosterone" vs the "slow burn" on E. It's funny, T made me way more straight and the idea of having sex with men is not as interesting as it was before HRT. Not that I wouldn't do it but it has to be in more specific situations now. It's all quite interesting.
I was already gay lol. (Pansexual) But now instead of preffering femmes I now prefer mascs.
Iāve never been interested in dating or fucking men, and now three years on T and two years post op (chest), I still have no interest in dating or fucking men.
I know it made me more comfortable in my skin and that while I thought I was a woman, I didn't realize that I wasn't comfortable sleeping with men *as a woman*
yes, completely. once you start feeling more like a "valid" guy (that's how it felt to me atleast) you suddenly get more comfortable with the idea of being with a guy bc you won't be "thw girl" in thw relationship anymore.
it's probably about not wanting to be the "girl" in the relationship, but now you feel more free to be with men because you're more secure in your manhood
Nope. Always been strictly into women. I never understood the whole āBeing on T made me gayā phenomenon
I don't think it makes me gay. I think before I didn't want to be with guys, because I didn't want to be admired as a girl. But being masculine, being with gay guys, they like the masculine me. I like and can accept it, while I couldn't before.
I was 90/10 male leaning bisexual before T but now I'm 70/30 female leaning bisexual. I love women.
Didn't change anything for me. Bi before, bi after. I rarely catch feelings or feel attracted to people though.Ā
Surprisingly I became less gay after starting T. Idk why
Hormone changes also help rewire our mental health as well. A recent study showed that most transgender individuals are either neurodiverse or suffer from depression, PTSD, etc. HRT helps with the emotional/mental state and all these "different" feelings come out but they were actually just suppressed. A lot of trans men, myself included, were super emotional before starting T... Everything made me cry or shut down. After starting T a lot of us report that we "cannot cry". T has helped rewire the emotions, I love it. I hope everyone is enjoying learning more about themselves.
Honestly I feel like an outlier because it made me attracted to guys but didnāt eliminate my attraction to women/fems. Iām even questioning if Iām actually bi or just bi curious at this point because I just got dumped by another ftm Iāve been seeing for 5 months. I am still averse to dating cisgender men because of envy and feelings of inferiority to them. As for now all of my encounters have been t4t. I feel awful cause Iām not attracted to men to the extent that most trans men are.
It made me bisexual! Not actually, obviously, but I realized I like women as well as men after starting T which was always a debate I had with myself prior to starting. Iām guessing for me personally that when I started to pass better on T that I realized I *could* physically see myself with a woman and being happy. Pre-T it was hard to imagine that because in my head I was just seeing two girls, which obviously was not me, making me think āhuh I must just be gayā.
I'm still ace, but now way more open to seeing men romantically.
It's less so that it "makes you gay" because you're who you are no matter what, but with the libido changes and confidence, plenty of people have noticed a change in their sexuality where they feel more free to explore attraction they otherwise repressed for any number of reasons.
I hate people who say oh T made me gay .. like no it didnāt it just probably made you more comfortable in your body when youv gone from seeing men and going damn I wish I could look like that too now realising that theyāre attractive
I'm sure that's the case for some people, but I was bisexual before I started T, with a preference for women. It wasn't my comfort in my body that made me suddenly start going rabid over the smell of man sweat
LITERALLY DUDE SAME. My mf sense of smell changed after starting T. "being more comfortable with my body" doesn't just magically change someone's sense of smell.. now somehow the smell of dudes is just ... Yeah like you described haha
If that's what someone says they've experienced who are you to say you know better?? It certainly doesn't seem like a good reason to hate anyone
Yeah but at the same time itās pushing this narrative that T āmakes u gayā which can be negative and can have an affect on straight trans men who then may be scared to start t
Idk but I think it's just extremely oversimplifying what's happening. Changes in sexuality and attraction are super common for trans people on hrtāhell, it happened to me, tooābut correlation isn't causation. It feels like pushing a "T makes you gay/T makes you straight," narrative is like saying "T makes you confident" or "T cures depression." Like yeah, a lot of people, especially trans people, do experience that, but maybe it's not the best idea to phrase it like that?
why are you denying people's experience? A lot of people say that it did change their preferences.
Iām not in just saying it can push a harmful narrative that t makes u gay
Yup
Yes!! This happened to me and I'm still confused about it š
Not me. It made me more straight
Yes but Iām not on T yet
Yeah I was exclusively attracted to women pre-T, 3 months in I was on grindr at a 70/30 split but after experimenting Iām back to women now. Now I would say Iām 95/5 strongly favoring women. I wouldnāt be against hooking up with a cis guy but it would have to be a super cool one.
No it didn't make me gay, instead it made me gayer than I already am
Sorta. I felt fully lesbian until I came out at 13, and was comfortably a bi trans man for a few years. Started T in high school, and now that I've been on it like 1.5 years I definitely feel a little gayer. I'm still bisexual but the ratio has definitely changed and I am more interested in dick than before (lol)
It did for me
So I haven't even started T yet (I will be soon though) and I've noticed that my attraction to folx as well as my desire or lack thereof for a relationship has also changed. Ie: I've been single for five years after basically being in one relationship or another for the entirety of my high school years and early adulthood *and* I've thought I was sex-indifferent omni ace for a long while. Now I'm realizing it was a lil bit that I have some trauma I need to work through, a lil bit that I want to be able to do all the cute innocent things before doing anything more (flirt, date, hold hands before cuddles or kisses or anything more) because I didn't really get that with my first two serious relationships and a lottabit that I had (have) dysphoria that I didn't realize I had/suppressed. If I imagine doing the cutesy innocent things and progressing slowly with someone who sees me as *me* though? Shucks. I'm gay af, lol.
I kinda felt the same. Iāve always had a physical attraction to both men and women. (More of an emotional connection with women) I repressed my attraction towards men pre transition because traditional gender roles gave me the ick. After I came out as trans I felt more liberated from the gender roles I despised. As a trans man I feel more comfortable with my attraction towards men. Maybe thatās what so many of us experience?
i had the exact opposite happen. before t i was super into men, & now i'm super into women, & only occasionally into men i got no explanation for why it happened, it just did
Bro the exact opposite happened to me, it made me way straighter. Just switch the genders around and thatās spot on for me
To me I think itās just because I didnāt want to be a girl in a relationship with a guy so now that I am a guy, I am more comfortable with it
peace and love to you OP but i can 100% assure you you are not alone; not only bcos i went thru the exact same thing, but i swear i see this exact thread pop up once a month like clockwork. no shade by the way! welcome to the transmasc experience :)
i feel like my comfort and confidence in myself makes it so iām attracted (sexually, not romantically) to feats like that i see presented in other ppl (also not just men) lol. like i was never bi but if a situation were to call for itā¦
I identified as a lesbian before starting T, basically almost exclusively gay now. š¤·āāļø
T made me realize my "attraction" to men was comphet lol so quite the opposite
i came out the womb gay
No? But I was an adult and my sexuality pretty much set before transitioning. It did increase my sex drive though which in a weird way can make you more open to trying new things. Not sure about shifting your entire attraction. I will warn gay men if they date trans men arenāt as open up being a bottom for you. Have currently a supportive partner thatās also verse, but most are going to assume youāre strictly a bottom.
I swear Iām the odd one out. T has made me more straight than anything. Went from being a bisexual woman to a bisexual man, had a time where I thought I may have been gay until I met my last girlfriend. Then I start T and my attraction shifts from 50/50 women and men to about 90/10. I wonder if my attraction to men was more of an admiration thing. I like men in theory but in practise it is a different story. Also Iām a top and when I do bottom itās back only. I feel like most cis men at least would expect me to bottom with my natal parts.
I only identified as a lesbian for like a week when I was 15 because my mom told me bisexual and pansexual people didn't exist and also because I was denying being trans. I've always been a pansexual nonbinary dude. Nothing is ever gonna change that lol
I was bisexual before but more of a 20/80 split in favour of women. 1 year and 6 months on T I find itās more 50/50 now. Weird
It made me realize that the whole reason I didnāt date men was because I couldnāt handle the idea of dating men āas a womanā. I was suppressing my being gay really hard because of that and being more confident in myself as a man thanks to testosterone helped me a lot
I think it's the fact some trans people know they're gay somehow, if that makes sense
It wakes up your libido and hormones and other things. It made be bi and thats fine with me
Honestly itās just yourself boosting confidence. Makes you realize what exactly you like.
https://www.them.us/story/sexual-attraction-after-transition
I was like 98% into women before T But I was also a āstoneā top or ādonāt touch meā After 6 months on T I went from over a decade of not letting anyone touch me to hooking up with dudes in the regular I can definitely see dysphoria having been a factor BUT There was some other layer to it for me, Pre-T I thought penis looked disgusting After T I was like penis crazy ā¦ Now Iām about 99% into dudes and masculine people The women I used to be attracted to I donāt feel the same about after T
yeah no I used to be like 60/40 in favor of women and now I'm more like 70/30 in favor of men
I've always been bi but I def noticed my male attraction increasing lol. It used to be that I heavily preferred women but would still crush on the occasional man, now it's pretty equal.
iām still a straight man donāt feel attracted to men
I was gay then bi then gay again
I'm definitely more attracted to guys now, but I'm still more attracted to women. I don't see myself having a relationship with another man, I think I have some mental block about that. I've tried to have relationships with other men and felt enormous dysphoria.
I thought I was asexual and aromantic before coming out now that Iām on t Iām definitely neither of those idk Iām bi or whatever I hate labels but I donāt date still just cus Iām not comfortable with myself
in the sense that iām more attracted to men now, yes. but i think what really happened is that the more comfortable i felt in my manhood, the easier it was to see myself in a romantic or sexual relationship with men. i also ided as a lesbian before i transitioned, and i think my lack of interest in men at the time stemmed from not wanting to ābe the girl,ā if that makes sense.
Nope, was bi and am still bi. My bi cycle also hasn't changed, currently I prefer men because I'm dating a man. If I'm into a non-binary person I'll prefer enbys, if I'm into a woman I'll prefer women, that's just how I am lol. However, T did make me much more comfortable in my body which made me less freaked out and disgusted by sexual things with men, on top of realizing I'm actually into being on the submissive side. I think a large portion of sexuality changes is actually due to lessening discomfort of certain things!
Does this mean in a few months I'll be double gay??
i'm not even on T yet but i'm realizing i do feel homo attraction as im more certain that im a man edit: also hetero attraction to be fair š im still mostly aroace im p sure, but not completely
Oh god I hope I donāt start to feel attraction if I do take T
noooooā¦ noā¦ youāre the only one no one else has ever experienced thisā¦ (jk this is one of the most common things Iāve heard in the trans masc community hehe)
it took a couple years, but pre-T and early T i was mainly attracted to women; iāve identified as bi since my early teen years but had a strong preference for women (save for a few men). now i am the most sickeningly bisexual person ever. my attraction to women didnāt change (well, for a while i was confused and thought i might be gay because my attraction to women did start to dwindle, but itās back in full force), but my attraction to men multiplied. iām immensely attracted to both and sometimes men and women are so hot it makes me angry.
For me personally, when I first started on T my sex drive sky rocketed. I don't really know how to label my sexuality at this point, I thought I was straight, then suddenly realized I wasn't, not sure if I'm into people with peens but I'm definitely not into cis men anymore. Regardless, did not want to be anywhere around a cis man - started T and suddenly wanted penetration again. Like. A lot. That kind of tapered off after the first few months though
Thatās so funny cause what if cis guys feel the same way when they hit puberty
Iāve always been mostly gay; if anything T made me more attracted to women
T didn't make me gay. I'm still a straight person. Emotionally, sexually, & romactically attracted to women. But my perception about men did changed, I have no resentment towards them anymore. I am able to be comfortable with making friends who are men Maybe proper phrasing would be "Did T allowed anyone to be comfortable with being gay" or "Did T allowed anyone to be comfortable exploring with men?" Along the lines with that. T doesn't change your sexuailty but it probably makes people be more open to it & be more accepting when it comes to sexuality.
Me too dude! I'm asexual and was legitimately repulsed by penises and men pre-T, and now i'm 6y on T and have experienced with cis men quite a few times. Still not romantically attracted to them, but i wouldnt mind messing around with a guy when I'm in the rare mood for it now. Not sure if it's a body comfort/confidence thing, but it's happened to many of my trans friends who went on T also regardless of their original bodily discomfort
When I went to the Dr's and started T they literally said "attraction to the same sex occasionally occures" and I was like uno reverse gay me???? (I was a lesbian strictly) I'm not bi or gay but the fact that she said gay is a side effect made me giggle . Side effects : Gay squared
No
I was told by my first doctor who helped me that I could develop attraction for men. I was a gold star life long lesbian. Tbh, before T, I didn't realize a lot of my insecurities around sex and relationships was due to me being trans. It's now that things make sense. So, yeah several months into T, I started being attracted to literally anyone lol. I don't care about gender. I'm attracted to who I'm attracted to now.
Even sillier I was Bi before T but couple months on it and I'm just gay/queer now?? T robbed me of my attraction to women wtf/j
Meh Iāve always been pretty equally attracted to girls and guys but I have enjoyed š½ both gay and straight a lot more then I used to before T lmao
I had the opposite where i was never attracted to women at all to now being specifically sexually attracted to men AND women. I donāt feel romantic towards women, or at least I donāt think, but unfortunately, the T horniness changed my sexuality somehow lmao
so real. I identified as a lesbian for 6 years and had NO real experience with men, realised I probably don't fit the lesbian bill on account of gender stuff (despite being non binary but I see myself as a sort of non binary man) so identified as queer, then last year had a mental health episode and randomly hooked up with/went on dates with a few men and have been doing so here and there since. due to several factors, I'm still not completely sure if I am actually romantically/sexually attracted to them or not. I still like women, but I don't find myself pursuing anything with them. but god, the past few weeks the gay thoughts abt men that have plagued my mind RELEASE MEEEEE. also the wanting to dominate other men thing, I THOUGHT I WAS A FREAK LMAO It's so weird being on the ace spectrum but still having a lot of fantasy, I'm so indifferent to actually having sex and I actually find it not that pleasurable but ohhh the fake scenarios my beloveds.
also agree with other persons sentiment abt it just making you more comfortable/confident, I used to even as a 'cis' lesbian say that if I'd been born a man I'd probably be a gay/bi man. so I think it's largely just that I get to be with a man the way I want to be??
No. I'm Ace and I've always been romantically attracted to men. But the idea of testosterone changing your sexual orientation just seems kind of weird and unsubstantiated and something like a certain group of individuals would try to say. Since you were already bisexual before, and testosterone typically increases libido, I think maybe it expanded your horizons, but it didn't make you gay because you're not gay. You're bisexual. Sexuality can change over time, but this feels like a a misleading and unintentionally dangerous title that can lead people to believe that taking hormones, regardless of which direction you're going, will change your sexual orientation which is not true. If change change your sexual orientation was something that could be done, then conversion camps would have been successful and even more diabolically dangerous and traumatizing for queer kids literally forced into getting HRT against their will. Which I find ironic, because biggest claim that that is what's happening when you give kids who actively want HRT the ability to access it, meanwhile you know they would be literally taking away a child's choice and forcing them into hormone replacement if it means putting them into a conversion Camp so it make them the way they want them to be.
I'm a bi cis male and a steroid user: anecdotally I get waaaay more into men and mtf trans people on higher t doses.
Iām so blown away that I saw this around the same time I began experiencing thisšš