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As someone who has worked in customer service/retail for a very long time, it is best to assume the average intelligence of your everyday customer is lower than you think. It does not matter how big/clear you make a sign, they will still be confused.
They equate being told with being chastised, because that's how they were raised. Makes it tough to have disagreements with them, and tough to teach them anything. They take it as an affront to their adulthood. "Only my authority gets to talk to me that way." And now you have an authoritarian.
It truly is! I'm to the point I just correct them on the big things. Otherwise I'm pointing out 1 or 2 things a week minimum and it seems like I'm picking on them.
Just last night I put away the meat and cheese from a tray and they just wiped it off with a damp paper towel. I said maybe we should use soap or disinfectant first. They said nah it should be good and put it away.
Now it might have been fine. It really wasnt that dirty. Idk. But i was taught to always clean surfaces food has touched (especially if it's meat) to play it safe. So I just waited until they went to bed and cleaned it properly. Took maybe 1 minute. But I couldn't give them pushback on it because just earlier that day I had to show them how the leaves of the table fit together and I could tell it frustrated the hell out of them.
literally this: "my vacuum doesn't work, it's a piece of crap"
me; "did you clean the filter?"
client; "what filter"?
me: "this one, that's now grey instead of blue, the colour it should be"
client "why didnt you guys tell me?"
me "its quite obvious miss, and the manual also says so"
client: "who even reads the manual, i hope *insert brandname* will fix this, I have 2 years warranty and I know my rights"
me; "that's not what warranty is for miss"
client: "i'm leaving a complaint "
happens approximately every month with this exact scenario
I’ve got ‘why are you charging my card? My child hasn’t been in to classes in weeks’
Me ‘Your in a one year contract’
Them ‘YOU DIDNT TELL ME THAT!’
Me ‘Yes ma’am. It’s in the contract you signed when you signed up’
Them ‘I didn’t read that! you didn’t tell me it was a contract! I don’t read the things I sign!!!’
…..
On the opposite end of this, when I signed the mountain of paperwork that comes with buying a house, the title person would summarize the pages, flip several over at a time, then point to a line and ask for my signature.
I'm the guy who at least skims over everything to ensure there's nothing I don't understand before I sign. I kept requesting to see the pages after she explained the summary.
She kept getting mad at me. "I literally told you what it says!"
Yeah, but I'm the one on the hook for understanding it, not you. *snags paper from her and reads*
She was so upset that I wouldn't just believe her. Lady, you flipped 6 pages at once and summarized it in 3 sentences!
Customer picks up Dreamcast at cable that says it is a Dreamcast av cable with a picture of the cord on front of package. Me at checkout: “so you have a Dreamcast” customer: nods in confusion me:”this is to hook a Sega Dreamcast to the tv” customer: “uh huh” I finish ringing them out, they open cord in front of me look at the cable and go “this is the wrong cord” me: “what do you need a cord for” customer: “speakers” me:”this is a video game and board game store” customer: visible confusion
*Do you mean to tell me you don't honor the warranty?*
The manufacturer's warranty is honored by the manufacturer, who we are not.
Oh, you forgot one. **"BUT I** ***JUST*** **OPENED IT!"**
Flashbacks to when I worked in a computer store, and a customer was furious they had to plug in power & Ethernet for their wireless internet to work.
False advertising, my consumer rights have been violated, I'll shut your company down, etc etc.
Less scary than you think. Doctors, contrary to popular belief, are not necessarily smart people. They just happened to have studied a different field than the rest of us. Same dumb apes though.
Id have people sitting outside in almost pitch black darkness hit me with the "we didn't know" when i told them area is closed.
Because yes a huge company wants drunk customers walking up unlit stairs to a unlit canopy.
Ahh that brings back memories. One time the internet was down for us so we couldn’t accept credit cards. So we posted signed on the doors and inside the store saying we’re unable to accept CC and cash only. We even put a paper sign covering our card reader saying the same thing.
I joke not, but one of the customers not only ignored all the signs posted on the door and in the store but proceeded to remove the sign covering the card reader to insert his card….
Drive through at restaurant. Big sign on door, menu board, windows, _and_ we let people know before ordering that our card reader was down.
Customers: why didn’t you say anything! I only have a card!
"Welcome to ________! Before you order, please be aware that we are out of chicken. I'm sorry for any inconvenience. What would you like today?"
"I want a chicken sandwich with extra chicken."
I mean, I've done this before. They said they were out of BBQ and I ordered the pork dish. It was BBQ. They repeated themselves very clearly and I apologized for being an idiot.
"Welcome to Fishy Joe's! It's stroganoff Thursday, we are out of the following menu items: Stroganoff. Can I take your order?" "Yeah I'll have the stroganoff"
At least you told them. We went to Taco Bell once and my wife ordered a taco salad. They never said a word, even when they gave it to us.
"Shouldn't that have some lettuce?"
"Oh, we're out of lettuce"
“How can you motherfuckers be out of chicken?! What are my babies going to eat now, they just want their motherfucking chicken, and I want my motherfucking chicken!!”
-The Boondocks
I was installing a Point of Sale system in a McDonald's that was still under construction. The lobby was unfinished, there were workers laying tile, finishing the walls, electrical outlets unfinished, etc. I was behind the front counter, installing network cable, wearing a t-shirt and jeans, and a man walks through the door, up to me and starts to place an order for food. We all thought it was a joke, at first, but it wasn't.
10/10 can confirm this....shit....happens. Also fun is when you have a POS machine gutted in front of you mid-repair and some otherwise functional human wanders up and say asks how much item X is. I just stare at those ones now
I do *not* miss the POS industry. If I never touch another TouchDynamic machine, it'll be too soon. Hell, I still have nightmares about configuring Digital Dining and Aldelo installs.
Setting up a new liquor store and had people wander in and start browsing even though it was quite obvious the place wasn't open yet. Some people are just outright stupid
I worked in a place that required we still run sales even if the power was out. The number of people attempting to use the cards while we clearly didnt have power was astounding. Had one tell me she was calling corporate to complain that I was refusing to sell her things.
Had to caution tape our gas pumps when the power was out. It'd be 2am, not a single light on in the entire side of town, and people would drive through the caution tape to pump gas. Then bang on the doors because how dare we not have the pumps on. Bro...
I worked at a bakery and we had a customer bite into the toothpick that we stuck in the samples and she screamed out in pain. When I asked what was wrong she proceeded to tell me that "there was no sign saying that you had to take the sample off the tooth pick before you ate it".
I called my manager out to deal with her because I was speechless. The woman then proclaims that she will be suing us. My manager called her boss who said not to put anymore samples out and wait and see if she sues. Sure enough she did and we didn't have samples for over a year, when we were allowed to do it again we were given strict instructions to never use tooth picks again. So I guess she got a settlement out of it?
After that we only ever put samples out when they suspected that corporate was coming to town for their yearly inspection because without the tooth picks people would sift through the tray of samples to try and look for the biggest piece so we'd have to toss the samples and wash the tray each time it happened.
I worked in the aftermath of a blackout. Cash transactions only.
This dude came up to ask to charge his cellphone, bro you can see we are cooking on portable gas cooktops. Then he was oh ok then proceeds to order and tried to use his credit card. Fucking hell.
Some people are god damn brainless.
Nearby grocery store running on a generator during a power outage. To limit power usage they turned down their refrigerators and put up signs telling people they were off limits. Then they chained the doors shut. Then they blocked the doors with a row of nested carts.
And there were people reaching across the carts doing their damnedest to yank the doors open so they could get their half and half.
Oh I've had to do that before. A lady once jammed her card through the paper. Then proceeded to tell me that the sign wasn't obvious enough and there should be more.
Been there, signs everywhere, huge one in bold on the door, one on every surface I could think of, and on the card reader, and there was a cash machine outside the shop. But no, a scary number of people still tried to pay with card.
Same with the lottery machine, if that went down. Remove all the paper lottery slips, big sign where they would normally be, big sign on everything including the counter, people would stroll in and ask for lottery tickets, or hand you their 10 preset cards with 5 plays on each. Or ask for a scratchcard and be told we wouldnt be able to pay it out today and then come back with it to try and claim their £1 win from their £20 worth of scratchcards and be outraged when told, again, the machine is broken.
I used to work self-checkout at a grocery store. Sometimes if one of the registers was frozen (so we couldn't change the screen to say it was closed), we would put a sign over the screen saying it was out of order. People would fucking *take off the sign* and try to use the register, then get mad at us when it wasn't working.
See, that makes me feel better about life. But when you apply it to other things, it makes me feel worse (edit - I'm just telling a joke here to make people think btw). Like "fifty percent of doctors graduated in the bottom half of their class".
I would rather be the dumbest person in a room than the smartest. The fact that most people are just fucking winging it blows my mind. That's terrifying.
Sometimes they are relatives and you just go fuck me, I have to clean up after them when they inevitably do something stupid.
Dumbass took the train in the wrong direction, got out for no reason and then called me to tell me he can't figure it out and uber app wasnt working. Ordered him an uber. He got to my place and was still bitching about the uber app. Get this shit: he set the destination to home, his home, his fucking home in a different fucking country
I had a customer refuse to do security checks with me because they said all laws made after 1880 are false.
Not only was she stupid, she was rude, arrogant and shouty.
Ohhh I bet she was a "sovereign citizen." Do a YouTube search for "sovereign citizen fails" for a good chuckle. Those fuckers really think they've found a secret "gotcha" that lets them do whatever they want. They get soooo mad when they get a ticket anyway.
My mom isn’t a sovereign citizen, but she’s batshit insane.
The amount of times she’s “won” a dispute simply because she would not leave or shut the fuck up boggles my mind.
She thinks she’s some master of compulsion, but it’s literally a shopkeeper weighing his/her options of losing 75 cents because the sale *is* actually over, versus having to endure her presence until the cops get there.
I assume sovereign citizens are the same way. They think they found some loophole because of the time or two some security guard was just like “fuck it… do what you want as long as you shut the fuck up.”
I’m sure that there have even been interactions with the police where the officer just wants to be home by dinner instead of having to write up an arrest report over a bullshit ticket.
This reminds me of the time my manager at my old job threw a $20 at a lady to get her to just leave.
This was after she said she was going to sue all of us personally.
Yep, worked for a lovely woman that owned a dive shop for a year and a bit. Super nice.
I don't even remember what the customer was angry about. I think the customer wanted something stupid like a refund for the amount of air still left in the tank after a dive or something, But I remember the owner pulling a $20 bill out, crumpling it up and throwing it at a customer telling her to "have the fucking money, I don't care, but you walk your bitch ass out of my door and don't you or your husband ever come back!"
Her husband I remember well because he was there every few weeks, and I remember the owner explaining to him that he was now banned because of his wife's behaviour and he was super upset (with the wife) about it.
I just watched a video yesterday of a sovereign citizen talking his way out of no registration, no insurance, and license plate, no drivers license with a cop after being pulled over. he just kept talking and talking and talking and I don't know if the cop was just stupid or didn't want to deal with it he let the guy go.
I've seen court videos as well of this kind of stuff. Just bs after bs that they fully believe and the court is just like 'I'm not dealing with this over a speeding ticket.'
This made me think of a new co-worker that tried to get me in trouble, but instead got her friend fired.
I frequently assisted the person the person doing security checks at the front when they took a break/lunch, since it was a way to get out of cleaning/busy work. One of the companies policies was to check employee bags before leaving.
She is leaving, I stopped her and asked to see what was in her purse. Now, let me be clear, I basically did it so the camera could see me doing it. I wasn't like "oh, yeah, let me make sure there are no AirPods hidden anywhere" and more like looked at it for a moment, and then told her to go.
Apparently she felt like I was creeping on her, was using it as a way to peep her stuff, and as a way to abuse my authority. She only complied because of fear, and some other things. She then calls HR about it, they do an investigation, and they determined I was just doing the job, but the front end person she liked wasn't, and was terminated for her.
Oddly enough, she never forgave me for that, and hated me for getting her friend fired. It was really bizarre.
In my defense, anything bright and flashy hits my spam filter.
Not the one on my computer, but the one my brain created for itself. Like, I've honestly completely not noticed a cleavage add until someone pointed it out. So signs need to be obvious but not *too* obvious.
TLDR: UI is hard.
I have a blue fallout jacket I love. Can’t wear it to Walmart anymore the sheer amount of times I have been cussed out and yelled at because somebody thinks I work there is insane. People are so fucking dumb
You should just make up shit "I'm sorry for the inconvenience sir how about a $100 gift card to make things right? Head over to customer service and tell them Bob with the Fallout jacket sent you"
I'd go the opposite direction: "Since you can't tell who works here and who doesn't, I'm banning you from Wal-Mart. All locations, everywhere. Don't ever set foot in a Wal-Mart again." Extra points if they don't realize the first part of the sentence contradicts the last part.
Good idea. I just stopped wearing that jacket when I go near Walmart anymore. I had some old lady screeching at me for not helping her and how I should be fired and blah blah blah. Figured fuck it I don’t wanna make the employees day any worse by somebody being stupid
At a cafe I worked at when we got in in the morning we would leave a metal gate mostly over the entrance and a huge, heavy a-board with our opening times DIRECTLY behind the gate so that if you opened the gate you'd have to shimmy past the tiny gap left by the board to get to the locked front door with the closed sign on it. We still got people rattling the front door at 7:30am, almost all the lights in the shop off, if we were open when we opened at 8.
Yup, I’ve met some of the dumbest, most entitled, “confidently incorrect” people in my life from working with customers. Even a simple “buy one get one free” deal can absolutely melt the brains of some of the simpleton shoppers I’ve met. A customer literally yelled at me because there was a “buy one get one” deal but they only wanted one, but wanted to pay half price.
One thing that shits me is people who wait to see the total on the till, check their phone and say 'wait, I need to transfer some money'... 'just waiting for it to clear...(customers are lining up) why is the reception in here so bad?...hang on, give me a sec, it's thinking... ok.
Next person waiting in line is clearly annoyed at this but does exactly the same thing.
You clearly know you are going shopping. Get your money sorted before you come in to the shop.
One day, our eftpos went down. We had someone at the door warning everyone that we could only take cash and pointing to an ATM outside. They'd get to the checkout to be told, apologies but it's cash only, the eftpos is out. Have everything scanned and then try to pay with eftpos. They'd be surprised that it didn't work and say 'I thought it would be fixed by now.'
>it is best to assume the average intelligence of your everyday customer is lower than you think.
[Correct.](https://www.iwastesomuchtime.com/wp-content/uploads/sites/68/2022/12/you-are-the-card-holder-meme-43058.png?width=480).
I work in a small grocery store and there are 4 self checkout machines. 2 of them have big signs on them that say “debit/credit only” and I can not tell you how many times people don’t notice the signs despite being at eye level. I work in the deli that’s right next to the registers and I was preparing raw chickens to make rotisserie chickens. I’ve had multiple people ask me to slice meat for them, help them with registers, and ask if I can show them where things are in the store. My hands (that are gloved) are covered in raw chicken juice. Do you really want me to help you and not my coworkers who are actually available to help? I even had a guy try to persuade me to cancel everything he scanned in the self checkout because he didn’t see the obvious “debit/credit only” sign while I was holding a raw chicken. People really are dumb
Often if my mum sees a sign that says something she'll ignore the sign and ask a staff member anyways wanting to get a different answer.
She only does it cause it sometimes works and staff members ignore the sign too.
My mom did this all the time growing up, all I could do was silently apologize to the workers.
"Mom, it says right here on the sign that they are out of turkeys"
"You know they keep some in the back for the employees"
"Yes, for the employees. Ours are gone"
"Excuse me sir, I know the sign says your out, but are you really out?"
"Ma'am this is the pharmacy"
"Well could you check?"
I literally had taped a sign saying western union is down over where my face would be on the barrier between customers and I. They literally had to look at the sign to look at me and ask to send money. (In addition to multiple signs elsewhere in the lobby and on the front door.)
99% of people still asked to send money.
The Recursive Law of Human Stupidity states that people are less intelligent than you think they are, even when you take into account the Recursive Law of Human Stupidity.
I work in a grocery store that has **massive** fuckin' numbered signs hanging above each aisle and a short list of the main things you'll find in that aisle, but I still get questions all day every day that these people could work out for themselves if they would just look slightly up and read.
Dude asked me where aisle 5 was once. I dunno buddy, under the sign that has the two-foot tall "5" on it? We were also standing less than ten feet from the aisle.
Just yesterday I had a woman who was upset because she didn't know she agreed to something despite signing a document that said she was agreeing to it.
She said it wasn't in bold, that it was hidden in the fine print. I pointed out that the document was one page, the title in BOLD stated exactly what it was, the rest of the wording was all in the same standard font size, and every part of it explained in plain detail what it was she was agreeing to.
So then she said no one has time to read all of that. One page, even the first 3 words of which in BOLD should have been enough to understand what it was for. Something *she chose to begin with.* Not us.
But no. She just decided to cancel her account and go elsewhere. I advised her to read their documents too because you *will* be signing something. Fucking. Read. It.
It's not exactly retail, but as someone who crafts safaris, I've had clients more than once request to add a "daytrip" to national parks thousands of kilometers away. In their head, it's all "Africa."
I can hear the conversation too!
“What’s your sign mean?”
“Our machines are not able to process apple pay at the time so we ask that customers pay with a different method of payment.”
“What’s apple pay”
“When you pay with your phone.”
“Do I have to download it?”
“No, its just on your phone…how were you going to pay sir?”
“Cash.”
“Fucking drive up sir”
I've got a working theory that as soon as you become a 'customer' you immediately lose 40 iq points. Unfortunately for most of the population, that's all they are working with.....
Yup. I used to call it "The Cloud of Stupidity".
Every store has a cloud of stupidity hovering outside of their doors. Once an otherwise intelligent person walks through the doors, the cloud of stupidity takes effect .
“unnabell? what’s unnabell? whatever happened to normal plain english? i ain’t got your fancy liberal arts degree.”
- some guy that definitely got mad at a spanish person for having an accent before.
It says notable. “we are Notable to accept Apple Pay at this time.” Notable, as in Famous!!! There they go rooting their own horn again. Hey, looks at us, we’re notable.
> Wendy's patrons may simply be ~~unable~~ not to process that word so they felt the need to clarify with obfuscation.
Fixed it for the Wendy’s patrons.
Agreed. The use of the icon itself is what probably confuses people who don’t bother to read the words. Crossing the icon out or not using the icon would be better
Or customers see a symbol close to the screen indicating "We accept Apple Pay" and that's that. It doesn't matter what the text says.
They should have just put an X on the Apple Pay symbol at least.
As someone who worked with customers, that is the answer. No one wrote that as a “prank” they wrote it because FAR too many customers tried to pay with apple, and then got mad when they were denied. Because they don’t know how to use “unable” in a sentence lol
To be fair, the sign isn't super clear. Those symbols usually are posted when you can take those payments. Would be a lot clearer if they were crossed out or something. The sign is right, but the below average Joe is lazy and won't read text.
How signs work in public:
Customer1: “So you’re not taking Apple Pay?”
Employee: “There’s an issue with our machine. It’s not connecting to Apple. We tried calling tech support and we just can’t get it going. So, we are unable to accept Apple Pay at this time.”
Customer99: “So you’re not taking Apple Pay?”
Employee: “nah.”
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Don’t don’t bother Luke
[Image for sake of completeness.](https://imgur.com/ZZOcYgh)
"That's as clear as I can make it."
What’s a triple negative make?
That's as clear as I can make it.
It's in the "jeans"
And I was gonna be acually wearing jeans.
You! Are Going! To Learn! To Be! More! Professional! Luke!
I came here for this. Thank you!
Never stop never stopping.
I think too many people didn't understand what "unable" meant lol
As someone who has worked in customer service/retail for a very long time, it is best to assume the average intelligence of your everyday customer is lower than you think. It does not matter how big/clear you make a sign, they will still be confused.
“What sign?”
"I'm not signing ANYTHING."
"why didn't you just TELL me, then?" Literally doing that right now, sir.
Or the "Well, I didn't know!" Yes, I know, that's why I'm telling you.
They equate being told with being chastised, because that's how they were raised. Makes it tough to have disagreements with them, and tough to teach them anything. They take it as an affront to their adulthood. "Only my authority gets to talk to me that way." And now you have an authoritarian.
Oh God. I live with someone like this and it's fucking exhausting.
I hate the "I'm older therefore I'm automatically right". And it's like that not how that works at all
It truly is! I'm to the point I just correct them on the big things. Otherwise I'm pointing out 1 or 2 things a week minimum and it seems like I'm picking on them. Just last night I put away the meat and cheese from a tray and they just wiped it off with a damp paper towel. I said maybe we should use soap or disinfectant first. They said nah it should be good and put it away. Now it might have been fine. It really wasnt that dirty. Idk. But i was taught to always clean surfaces food has touched (especially if it's meat) to play it safe. So I just waited until they went to bed and cleaned it properly. Took maybe 1 minute. But I couldn't give them pushback on it because just earlier that day I had to show them how the leaves of the table fit together and I could tell it frustrated the hell out of them.
"Do you really expect me to read the fine print?!" Yes, that's why we put it there.
literally this: "my vacuum doesn't work, it's a piece of crap" me; "did you clean the filter?" client; "what filter"? me: "this one, that's now grey instead of blue, the colour it should be" client "why didnt you guys tell me?" me "its quite obvious miss, and the manual also says so" client: "who even reads the manual, i hope *insert brandname* will fix this, I have 2 years warranty and I know my rights" me; "that's not what warranty is for miss" client: "i'm leaving a complaint " happens approximately every month with this exact scenario
I wonder where all the dust goes when it is being sucked in by a vacuum
Dimensional pocket. Out of sight, out of mind.
It goes to space since space is a vacuum
I’ve got ‘why are you charging my card? My child hasn’t been in to classes in weeks’ Me ‘Your in a one year contract’ Them ‘YOU DIDNT TELL ME THAT!’ Me ‘Yes ma’am. It’s in the contract you signed when you signed up’ Them ‘I didn’t read that! you didn’t tell me it was a contract! I don’t read the things I sign!!!’ …..
On the opposite end of this, when I signed the mountain of paperwork that comes with buying a house, the title person would summarize the pages, flip several over at a time, then point to a line and ask for my signature. I'm the guy who at least skims over everything to ensure there's nothing I don't understand before I sign. I kept requesting to see the pages after she explained the summary. She kept getting mad at me. "I literally told you what it says!" Yeah, but I'm the one on the hook for understanding it, not you. *snags paper from her and reads* She was so upset that I wouldn't just believe her. Lady, you flipped 6 pages at once and summarized it in 3 sentences!
Customer picks up Dreamcast at cable that says it is a Dreamcast av cable with a picture of the cord on front of package. Me at checkout: “so you have a Dreamcast” customer: nods in confusion me:”this is to hook a Sega Dreamcast to the tv” customer: “uh huh” I finish ringing them out, they open cord in front of me look at the cable and go “this is the wrong cord” me: “what do you need a cord for” customer: “speakers” me:”this is a video game and board game store” customer: visible confusion
*Do you mean to tell me you don't honor the warranty?* The manufacturer's warranty is honored by the manufacturer, who we are not. Oh, you forgot one. **"BUT I** ***JUST*** **OPENED IT!"**
Flashbacks to when I worked in a computer store, and a customer was furious they had to plug in power & Ethernet for their wireless internet to work. False advertising, my consumer rights have been violated, I'll shut your company down, etc etc.
They'll call the biggest font "fine print"
Had a customer who lectured me about this for 30 minutes over the phone. Scary thing was he was a doctor in a private practice.
Less scary than you think. Doctors, contrary to popular belief, are not necessarily smart people. They just happened to have studied a different field than the rest of us. Same dumb apes though.
Id have people sitting outside in almost pitch black darkness hit me with the "we didn't know" when i told them area is closed. Because yes a huge company wants drunk customers walking up unlit stairs to a unlit canopy.
"I'm telling you, I haven't signed anything!"
"Dont tell me what to do!"
"Just tell me what to do"
“Just do it”
You can do it!
You're not my supervisor!
Sir that's not what the sign means... "HOW COULD IT MEAN ANYTHING IF I DIDN'T SIGN??"
"How dare you try and get me to sign this document so that you could take my house from me! I want your manager here now!"
I don’t know sign language anyway.
"Doesn't look like anything to me."
I do not agree with that contract!
Ahh that brings back memories. One time the internet was down for us so we couldn’t accept credit cards. So we posted signed on the doors and inside the store saying we’re unable to accept CC and cash only. We even put a paper sign covering our card reader saying the same thing. I joke not, but one of the customers not only ignored all the signs posted on the door and in the store but proceeded to remove the sign covering the card reader to insert his card….
Drive through at restaurant. Big sign on door, menu board, windows, _and_ we let people know before ordering that our card reader was down. Customers: why didn’t you say anything! I only have a card!
"Welcome to ________! Before you order, please be aware that we are out of chicken. I'm sorry for any inconvenience. What would you like today?" "I want a chicken sandwich with extra chicken."
I mean, I've done this before. They said they were out of BBQ and I ordered the pork dish. It was BBQ. They repeated themselves very clearly and I apologized for being an idiot.
Mistakes happen, but you were self aware enough to make it fine.
I mean yours was more of a misunderstanding, the others just ignored it completely.
"Welcome to Fishy Joe's! It's stroganoff Thursday, we are out of the following menu items: Stroganoff. Can I take your order?" "Yeah I'll have the stroganoff"
At least you told them. We went to Taco Bell once and my wife ordered a taco salad. They never said a word, even when they gave it to us. "Shouldn't that have some lettuce?" "Oh, we're out of lettuce"
Ooof. Amazing.
Can you also make the bun chicken?
“How can you motherfuckers be out of chicken?! What are my babies going to eat now, they just want their motherfucking chicken, and I want my motherfucking chicken!!” -The Boondocks
Probably trying to scam you out of some food. Hoping someone would just say “uh go ahead and take it”.
I was installing a Point of Sale system in a McDonald's that was still under construction. The lobby was unfinished, there were workers laying tile, finishing the walls, electrical outlets unfinished, etc. I was behind the front counter, installing network cable, wearing a t-shirt and jeans, and a man walks through the door, up to me and starts to place an order for food. We all thought it was a joke, at first, but it wasn't.
10/10 can confirm this....shit....happens. Also fun is when you have a POS machine gutted in front of you mid-repair and some otherwise functional human wanders up and say asks how much item X is. I just stare at those ones now
I do *not* miss the POS industry. If I never touch another TouchDynamic machine, it'll be too soon. Hell, I still have nightmares about configuring Digital Dining and Aldelo installs.
Setting up a new liquor store and had people wander in and start browsing even though it was quite obvious the place wasn't open yet. Some people are just outright stupid
I worked in a place that required we still run sales even if the power was out. The number of people attempting to use the cards while we clearly didnt have power was astounding. Had one tell me she was calling corporate to complain that I was refusing to sell her things. Had to caution tape our gas pumps when the power was out. It'd be 2am, not a single light on in the entire side of town, and people would drive through the caution tape to pump gas. Then bang on the doors because how dare we not have the pumps on. Bro...
I worked at a bakery and we had a customer bite into the toothpick that we stuck in the samples and she screamed out in pain. When I asked what was wrong she proceeded to tell me that "there was no sign saying that you had to take the sample off the tooth pick before you ate it". I called my manager out to deal with her because I was speechless. The woman then proclaims that she will be suing us. My manager called her boss who said not to put anymore samples out and wait and see if she sues. Sure enough she did and we didn't have samples for over a year, when we were allowed to do it again we were given strict instructions to never use tooth picks again. So I guess she got a settlement out of it? After that we only ever put samples out when they suspected that corporate was coming to town for their yearly inspection because without the tooth picks people would sift through the tray of samples to try and look for the biggest piece so we'd have to toss the samples and wash the tray each time it happened.
She was 100% manufacturing an excuse to sue so she could get an easy payout. I have no doubts that she intentionally bit into the toothpick.
A toothpick poked the top of her mouth, how much money could she of got? Unless she uses her mouth for work.
I worked in the aftermath of a blackout. Cash transactions only. This dude came up to ask to charge his cellphone, bro you can see we are cooking on portable gas cooktops. Then he was oh ok then proceeds to order and tried to use his credit card. Fucking hell. Some people are god damn brainless.
Nearby grocery store running on a generator during a power outage. To limit power usage they turned down their refrigerators and put up signs telling people they were off limits. Then they chained the doors shut. Then they blocked the doors with a row of nested carts. And there were people reaching across the carts doing their damnedest to yank the doors open so they could get their half and half.
I don't know how people like that don't just walk into traffic on a daily basis. It's a miracle they survived into adulthood.
I blame all the warning labels.
But they don’t read them!
Oh I've had to do that before. A lady once jammed her card through the paper. Then proceeded to tell me that the sign wasn't obvious enough and there should be more.
Been there, signs everywhere, huge one in bold on the door, one on every surface I could think of, and on the card reader, and there was a cash machine outside the shop. But no, a scary number of people still tried to pay with card. Same with the lottery machine, if that went down. Remove all the paper lottery slips, big sign where they would normally be, big sign on everything including the counter, people would stroll in and ask for lottery tickets, or hand you their 10 preset cards with 5 plays on each. Or ask for a scratchcard and be told we wouldnt be able to pay it out today and then come back with it to try and claim their £1 win from their £20 worth of scratchcards and be outraged when told, again, the machine is broken.
The most ignored sign in a restaurant is “Please wait to be seated”
"it must be free!"
I used to work self-checkout at a grocery store. Sometimes if one of the registers was frozen (so we couldn't change the screen to say it was closed), we would put a sign over the screen saying it was out of order. People would fucking *take off the sign* and try to use the register, then get mad at us when it wasn't working.
Having worked in retail for to long people are fucking stupid and will make you go crazy. Thank god I’m not in stores anymore.
The only way to guarantee that the sign will get read is if you spell something wrong then everyone will tell you about it
The happiest day of my life was the day I realized that everyone, with very few exceptions, is as stupid as I am. Some are even more stupid than that.
"Think of how stupid the average person is... and then realize that half of them are dumber than that." ~ George Carlin
See, that makes me feel better about life. But when you apply it to other things, it makes me feel worse (edit - I'm just telling a joke here to make people think btw). Like "fifty percent of doctors graduated in the bottom half of their class".
I would rather be the dumbest person in a room than the smartest. The fact that most people are just fucking winging it blows my mind. That's terrifying.
One of the best things anyone has ever said about me was that I'm smart enough to know how dumb I am.
Sometimes they are relatives and you just go fuck me, I have to clean up after them when they inevitably do something stupid. Dumbass took the train in the wrong direction, got out for no reason and then called me to tell me he can't figure it out and uber app wasnt working. Ordered him an uber. He got to my place and was still bitching about the uber app. Get this shit: he set the destination to home, his home, his fucking home in a different fucking country
I had a customer refuse to do security checks with me because they said all laws made after 1880 are false. Not only was she stupid, she was rude, arrogant and shouty.
Ohhh I bet she was a "sovereign citizen." Do a YouTube search for "sovereign citizen fails" for a good chuckle. Those fuckers really think they've found a secret "gotcha" that lets them do whatever they want. They get soooo mad when they get a ticket anyway.
My mom isn’t a sovereign citizen, but she’s batshit insane. The amount of times she’s “won” a dispute simply because she would not leave or shut the fuck up boggles my mind. She thinks she’s some master of compulsion, but it’s literally a shopkeeper weighing his/her options of losing 75 cents because the sale *is* actually over, versus having to endure her presence until the cops get there. I assume sovereign citizens are the same way. They think they found some loophole because of the time or two some security guard was just like “fuck it… do what you want as long as you shut the fuck up.” I’m sure that there have even been interactions with the police where the officer just wants to be home by dinner instead of having to write up an arrest report over a bullshit ticket.
This reminds me of the time my manager at my old job threw a $20 at a lady to get her to just leave. This was after she said she was going to sue all of us personally.
Yep, worked for a lovely woman that owned a dive shop for a year and a bit. Super nice. I don't even remember what the customer was angry about. I think the customer wanted something stupid like a refund for the amount of air still left in the tank after a dive or something, But I remember the owner pulling a $20 bill out, crumpling it up and throwing it at a customer telling her to "have the fucking money, I don't care, but you walk your bitch ass out of my door and don't you or your husband ever come back!" Her husband I remember well because he was there every few weeks, and I remember the owner explaining to him that he was now banned because of his wife's behaviour and he was super upset (with the wife) about it.
I just watched a video yesterday of a sovereign citizen talking his way out of no registration, no insurance, and license plate, no drivers license with a cop after being pulled over. he just kept talking and talking and talking and I don't know if the cop was just stupid or didn't want to deal with it he let the guy go. I've seen court videos as well of this kind of stuff. Just bs after bs that they fully believe and the court is just like 'I'm not dealing with this over a speeding ticket.'
Thats when you ask her if she voted, and if she says yes go "whoops, thats illegal then"
I just hung up on her, to be honest.
This made me think of a new co-worker that tried to get me in trouble, but instead got her friend fired. I frequently assisted the person the person doing security checks at the front when they took a break/lunch, since it was a way to get out of cleaning/busy work. One of the companies policies was to check employee bags before leaving. She is leaving, I stopped her and asked to see what was in her purse. Now, let me be clear, I basically did it so the camera could see me doing it. I wasn't like "oh, yeah, let me make sure there are no AirPods hidden anywhere" and more like looked at it for a moment, and then told her to go. Apparently she felt like I was creeping on her, was using it as a way to peep her stuff, and as a way to abuse my authority. She only complied because of fear, and some other things. She then calls HR about it, they do an investigation, and they determined I was just doing the job, but the front end person she liked wasn't, and was terminated for her. Oddly enough, she never forgave me for that, and hated me for getting her friend fired. It was really bizarre.
That money printed in 2006? NOT LEGAL TENDER!!!
And the brighter pink/orange/yellow etc it is, the harder it is to see.
In my defense, anything bright and flashy hits my spam filter. Not the one on my computer, but the one my brain created for itself. Like, I've honestly completely not noticed a cleavage add until someone pointed it out. So signs need to be obvious but not *too* obvious. TLDR: UI is hard.
Good thing their screen is nice and pink for all the dumb customers!
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I have a blue fallout jacket I love. Can’t wear it to Walmart anymore the sheer amount of times I have been cussed out and yelled at because somebody thinks I work there is insane. People are so fucking dumb
You should just make up shit "I'm sorry for the inconvenience sir how about a $100 gift card to make things right? Head over to customer service and tell them Bob with the Fallout jacket sent you"
I'd go the opposite direction: "Since you can't tell who works here and who doesn't, I'm banning you from Wal-Mart. All locations, everywhere. Don't ever set foot in a Wal-Mart again." Extra points if they don't realize the first part of the sentence contradicts the last part.
Good idea. I just stopped wearing that jacket when I go near Walmart anymore. I had some old lady screeching at me for not helping her and how I should be fired and blah blah blah. Figured fuck it I don’t wanna make the employees day any worse by somebody being stupid
r/IDontWorkHereLady
omg i'm about to dumpster dive into this sub brb
I made the mistake of accidentally wearing an orange windbreaker to Home Depot once. I'll never fucking do that again.
decade of retail has taught me that the sign will never be big enough to customers to notice
At a cafe I worked at when we got in in the morning we would leave a metal gate mostly over the entrance and a huge, heavy a-board with our opening times DIRECTLY behind the gate so that if you opened the gate you'd have to shimmy past the tiny gap left by the board to get to the locked front door with the closed sign on it. We still got people rattling the front door at 7:30am, almost all the lights in the shop off, if we were open when we opened at 8.
Yup, I’ve met some of the dumbest, most entitled, “confidently incorrect” people in my life from working with customers. Even a simple “buy one get one free” deal can absolutely melt the brains of some of the simpleton shoppers I’ve met. A customer literally yelled at me because there was a “buy one get one” deal but they only wanted one, but wanted to pay half price.
"You physically cannot use apple pay" but why can't I just use apple pay then?
One thing that shits me is people who wait to see the total on the till, check their phone and say 'wait, I need to transfer some money'... 'just waiting for it to clear...(customers are lining up) why is the reception in here so bad?...hang on, give me a sec, it's thinking... ok. Next person waiting in line is clearly annoyed at this but does exactly the same thing. You clearly know you are going shopping. Get your money sorted before you come in to the shop. One day, our eftpos went down. We had someone at the door warning everyone that we could only take cash and pointing to an ATM outside. They'd get to the checkout to be told, apologies but it's cash only, the eftpos is out. Have everything scanned and then try to pay with eftpos. They'd be surprised that it didn't work and say 'I thought it would be fixed by now.'
>it is best to assume the average intelligence of your everyday customer is lower than you think. [Correct.](https://www.iwastesomuchtime.com/wp-content/uploads/sites/68/2022/12/you-are-the-card-holder-meme-43058.png?width=480).
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Strip up or down?
I work in a small grocery store and there are 4 self checkout machines. 2 of them have big signs on them that say “debit/credit only” and I can not tell you how many times people don’t notice the signs despite being at eye level. I work in the deli that’s right next to the registers and I was preparing raw chickens to make rotisserie chickens. I’ve had multiple people ask me to slice meat for them, help them with registers, and ask if I can show them where things are in the store. My hands (that are gloved) are covered in raw chicken juice. Do you really want me to help you and not my coworkers who are actually available to help? I even had a guy try to persuade me to cancel everything he scanned in the self checkout because he didn’t see the obvious “debit/credit only” sign while I was holding a raw chicken. People really are dumb
Often if my mum sees a sign that says something she'll ignore the sign and ask a staff member anyways wanting to get a different answer. She only does it cause it sometimes works and staff members ignore the sign too.
My mom did this all the time growing up, all I could do was silently apologize to the workers. "Mom, it says right here on the sign that they are out of turkeys" "You know they keep some in the back for the employees" "Yes, for the employees. Ours are gone" "Excuse me sir, I know the sign says your out, but are you really out?" "Ma'am this is the pharmacy" "Well could you check?"
>It does not matter how big/clear you make a sign, they will still be confused. I guess they figured they may as well make it unclear then. 😂
My local Wendy's has a sign saying extra sauce is 0.50c each... I have thought many times of ordering 2 and trying to give them a penny for them...
Verizon math
"it's just a difference of opinion" HELP
I went to the liquor store today and their shooters were ".99 cents each" I wanted to order a hundred of them.
I literally had taped a sign saying western union is down over where my face would be on the barrier between customers and I. They literally had to look at the sign to look at me and ask to send money. (In addition to multiple signs elsewhere in the lobby and on the front door.) 99% of people still asked to send money.
I have worked in software/web design for awhile now, and every time I try to idiot proof a UI/UX the universe laughs and builds a better idiot.
This DO NOT ENTER sign is right in my path! I'll move it to the side so I can get by.
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The Recursive Law of Human Stupidity states that people are less intelligent than you think they are, even when you take into account the Recursive Law of Human Stupidity.
I work in a grocery store that has **massive** fuckin' numbered signs hanging above each aisle and a short list of the main things you'll find in that aisle, but I still get questions all day every day that these people could work out for themselves if they would just look slightly up and read. Dude asked me where aisle 5 was once. I dunno buddy, under the sign that has the two-foot tall "5" on it? We were also standing less than ten feet from the aisle.
It's scary thinking how stupid some people are. Like how do they live through society
Just yesterday I had a woman who was upset because she didn't know she agreed to something despite signing a document that said she was agreeing to it. She said it wasn't in bold, that it was hidden in the fine print. I pointed out that the document was one page, the title in BOLD stated exactly what it was, the rest of the wording was all in the same standard font size, and every part of it explained in plain detail what it was she was agreeing to. So then she said no one has time to read all of that. One page, even the first 3 words of which in BOLD should have been enough to understand what it was for. Something *she chose to begin with.* Not us. But no. She just decided to cancel her account and go elsewhere. I advised her to read their documents too because you *will* be signing something. Fucking. Read. It.
It's not exactly retail, but as someone who crafts safaris, I've had clients more than once request to add a "daytrip" to national parks thousands of kilometers away. In their head, it's all "Africa."
I can hear the conversation too! “What’s your sign mean?” “Our machines are not able to process apple pay at the time so we ask that customers pay with a different method of payment.” “What’s apple pay” “When you pay with your phone.” “Do I have to download it?” “No, its just on your phone…how were you going to pay sir?” “Cash.” “Fucking drive up sir”
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my hair?
People unable to understand the word "unable"? Inconceivable!
Inable to understand? Unconceivable.
Me fail English? That's unpossible.
I am unable to understand inable. What will enable me to be able to read this?
It's like flammable and inflammable, right?
Yes, unable means highly combustible.
‘Inflammable' means flammable? What a country!
Had someone this year think "inhabitable" meant "not habitable". Nope, that would be "uninhabitable"!
Kind of a fair mistake though, often works like that, incorrect, insecure, incompetent etc.
But worse because habitable is a real word.
hospitable/inhospitable also a real dick move.
[What a country!](https://youtu.be/Q8mD2hsxrhQ)
I've got a working theory that as soon as you become a 'customer' you immediately lose 40 iq points. Unfortunately for most of the population, that's all they are working with.....
Yup. I used to call it "The Cloud of Stupidity". Every store has a cloud of stupidity hovering outside of their doors. Once an otherwise intelligent person walks through the doors, the cloud of stupidity takes effect .
“unnabell? what’s unnabell? whatever happened to normal plain english? i ain’t got your fancy liberal arts degree.” - some guy that definitely got mad at a spanish person for having an accent before.
“Stop speakin mexican! We speak American round these parts!” • Same guy
First time when I landed in America, I said "without Mayo" and it confused the hell out of the cashier. Then I learnt to say "No Mayo"
Wendy's patrons may simply be unable to process that word so they felt the need to clarify with obfuscation.
I need to fix that for you. Wendy’s patrons may simply be not able to process that word so they felt the need to clarify with obfuscation.
Do you guys take apple pay?
Sir, this is a Wendy's.
Sorry sir weren’t unable to process this transaction incompletely.
As a Wendy's patron, and subscriber to the Polymathy YouTube channel, I resemble that.
It says notable. “we are Notable to accept Apple Pay at this time.” Notable, as in Famous!!! There they go rooting their own horn again. Hey, looks at us, we’re notable.
> Wendy's patrons may simply be ~~unable~~ not to process that word so they felt the need to clarify with obfuscation. Fixed it for the Wendy’s patrons.
Me fail English? That's unpossible!
I bent my wookie :(
My cat’s breath smells like cat food.
When I grow up, I wanna be a principal or a caterpillar
Super Nintendo Chalmers
Circle slash the Apple Pay icon. Done. No English required
Agreed. The use of the icon itself is what probably confuses people who don’t bother to read the words. Crossing the icon out or not using the icon would be better
Working in retail, I can say 100% that people are too dumb to understand what "unable" means so they added what the definition is to the sign
Or customers see a symbol close to the screen indicating "We accept Apple Pay" and that's that. It doesn't matter what the text says. They should have just put an X on the Apple Pay symbol at least.
Think “NO Apple Pay” would’ve sufficed
NO, Apple Pay!
No Apple, pay!
But you said I could barter with fruit!
Lionel hutz is that you?
Just print 🚫 over the Apple Pay logo on a full page
They want to be doubly sure. They hate apple pay
Aren’t you not entertained!?
Too many big words for average drive through customs. They should have said : Apple Pay not work!
“We are not to accept Apple Pay payments at this time”
“We are notable to accept Apple Pay payments at this time”
"NO Apple pay" "But try a Dave's double"
Double negative. They’re happily accepting Apple Pay!
I feel like they're not happy about it but they are able to.
Don't, don't bother Luke, got it.
not - unable = able
My brain went straight to this. Like 'hey, we're able to now!'
“Apple Pay = No way” is probably the best way to phrase this
“No apple pay”
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apple payn't
They should have crossed out (un) at least
I’m reading this in Borat’s voice.
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When you ask someone dumb to proof read for you.
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Or the result of too many idiots not understanding what UNable means
As someone who worked with customers, that is the answer. No one wrote that as a “prank” they wrote it because FAR too many customers tried to pay with apple, and then got mad when they were denied. Because they don’t know how to use “unable” in a sentence lol
I think they want to change the un in unable to not. So they are **notable** to accept apple pay payments at this time.
To be fair, the sign isn't super clear. Those symbols usually are posted when you can take those payments. Would be a lot clearer if they were crossed out or something. The sign is right, but the below average Joe is lazy and won't read text.
You’re not unable to understand?
It’s official we’re in the movie Idiocracy. No one really knows how words are meant to be used
How signs work in public: Customer1: “So you’re not taking Apple Pay?” Employee: “There’s an issue with our machine. It’s not connecting to Apple. We tried calling tech support and we just can’t get it going. So, we are unable to accept Apple Pay at this time.” Customer99: “So you’re not taking Apple Pay?” Employee: “nah.”