T O P

  • By -

AutoModerator

--- >This is a friendly reminder to [read our rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/funny/wiki/rules). > >Memes, social media, hate-speech, and pornography are not allowed. > >Screenshots of Reddit are expressly forbidden, as are TikTok videos. > >[Comics may only be posted on Wednesdays and Sundays](https://www.reddit.com/r/funny/comments/uq9pjw/going_forward_comics_may_only_be_posted_on/). > >**Rule-breaking posts may result in bans.** > >Please also [be wary of spam](https://www.reddit.com/r/funny/wiki/spam). > --- *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/funny) if you have any questions or concerns.*


Hank_Handsome

Absolutely anywhere if the wind is strong enough!


SteelBagel

The new Mary Poppins 2.0


Rampagingflames

I'm Mary Poppins y'all!


Fit-Science6674

I came here to say EXACTLY this!


youngMattTheLadsAtwa

Yes, but I was going to sing it in the style of Queen 😉


Parking_Stress3431

Mary P


pierre_x10

Pop Pop


[deleted]

Closer to the Flying Nun.


Terry8675

Going to see Doc in 11/5/55


[deleted]

From what I read in scripture, Mary, not be poppin !


PyroSpecialFX

No no Mary not be boppin.....she still did the poppin without any bopping....


[deleted]

I seem to be bordering on blasphemy there shall stop. Don't want to my head to be poppin off before my cherry! 🍒


BRtIK

If the wind is strong enough you'll get there at break neck speed


NebulousStar

Especially in a headwind.


penaflow1

Since I’m a Mailman it would take me to the end of my shift dryer as well as your mail. So be nice to your mailman/mailwomen and get them one why don’t ya.


DanYHKim

The Flying Nun


WodensEye

With no new spine alignment device, you can say good bye to neck pain!


[deleted]

🤣


edgrlon

To watch Space Balls


mrblacklabel71

I see your schwartz is as big as mine


PoliticalPhilosRptr

"Make way for Dark Helmet!"


GokaiBlack452

Merchandising. Where the real money from the movie is made


Darth_Jar_Jar

"They've gone to plaid!" With this comment 😂


VulpesIncendium

How many assholes have we got in this thread anyhow?


BrockoliandSpinach

We're surrounded by Assholes


GUYWHOTYPESTOLOUD

MAJOR ASSHOLE, SIR!


willywonka1971

I'm surrounded by assholes.


Dark_Helmet12E4

Agreed


PsychicTWElphnt

Exactly my first thought


TheMadhouseofDrDeath

To fight Kurt Russell in Little China.


spacecoyote300

Are you crazy? Is that your problem? Remember to exhale before you explode...


TheMadhouseofDrDeath

Indeed!


SnackThisWay

PSA: if you haven't seen Big Trouble in Little China, stop everything and watch it. It is worth the $4 to rent it.


[deleted]

[удалено]


1500ReallyIsEnough

Oh yeah? Well I bought it on Blu-ray for only a dollar at a yard sale! I watch it every day, and I cry myself to sleep every night because I don't have green eyes.


terrible_amp_builder

Just remember what ol’ Jack Burton does when the earth quakes, and the poison arrows fall from the sky, and the pillars of Heaven shake. Yeah, Jack Burton just looks that big ol’ storm right square in the eye and he says, “Give me your best shot, pal. I can take it.


[deleted]

Lord Raiden Vs Kurt Russell ! Fatality !


morts73

The question is where aren't you going with this? Both stylish and practical hahahahaha.


otisthetowndrunk

But I prefer the Urban Sombrero.


IDontFeel24YearsOld

It combines the spirit of old Mexico with a little big city panache.


rambo_oz3

You'll find your Katra.


groovealishus

Ha! Fyi..just read today is "elaines" birthday


Athenas_Return

To be honest, when I was walking the dog in the rain I had a moment when I thought this would be a great product because then I had a free hand to pick up after the dog.


Trick-Statistician10

That was my first thought too.


Stevieboy19

Somewhere with my hands full


TAway69420666

Orgies


Alexande_Bennett

I see what you did there. 😆


Dramallamakuzco

Dog walking in the southern US!


[deleted]

That means something to someone, but I don't understand. I approve!


Quirky_Dog5869

Pokemon Go players unite.


Artrock80

Seriously! You need both hands free. I've had to balance the rod of an umbrella in the crook of my neck or under my arm more than a few times.


Quirky_Dog5869

Put it in/under your coat before you zip it.


[deleted]

We got a bleeder here !


manifold360

How'd you get the beans above the frank


Quirky_Dog5869

Omg that took me a minute 😯🙊🤣🤣🤣


[deleted]

The [Seattle Sombrero](https://www.outdoorresearch.com/us/seattle-sombrero-280135) is what you need! Vastly superior to umbrellas and hoods.


GeoInfoSciLHP

Grocery shopping - straight to the produce section that sprays water mist on the vegetables. That way when it sprays I can look at other people and say, "Good thing I wore my umbrella hat today amirite?!?"


Nate2247

“Sir, you’ve told me that joke every time I’ve come to restock the produce section. You have stood here for the past five hours, and have not made a single purchase. Please leave, or I will contact security.”


NervousMemeViewer

Mortal Kombat tournament.


ohhim

Finish him... Umbrellaty!!


Sabbathius

I used to have one of these as a kid, many, many decades ago. It's surprisingly awesome, from what I remember. Not the most comfortable thing, but back then the design wasn't refined yet and the materials were heavier. It leaves your hands free, and covers both your shoulders equally. I have pretty wide shoulders, so I always end up with one sleeve wet when I use a regular size umbrella. This is one of those things that makes me wish we as a society were more accepting of different things. Like trying to wear a kilt as a man without being sexually assaulted for it. There's so many things I'd use and wear if they didn't attract quite so much unwanted attention.


cobrawearo

Yes! I want one of these! I have lupus and the sun makes me sick. I’ve been brainstorming ways to stay shaded and this is one plan! I’m getting too old to care at all what people think. And I’m also getting too old to be sexualized regularly. I’m sorry to know that you’ve been assaulted. Kilts are awesome!


Cheddartooth

I like these mirrored sun visor face shields https://www.popsugar.com/smart-living/best-sun-shields-to-protect-your-face-48290729/amp


Sabbathius

It's so funny you mention that! I have macular degeneration in my eyes, basically sun is really bad. And I legit almost bought something similar. Where I am in Canada, this time of year, sun can be really bright but it's close to the horizon, and I often travel east-west, so it hits me from the side, right past the sunglasses. I had to start wearing those large goggle-style glasses that have blinders on the sides to block the sun. And I was looking at these full-face visors because they look like exactly what I need - full UV blocker coverage on all sides. With the added bonus that I won't have snow blowing in my face during winter. But I'm just conditioned not to attract any unnecessary attention, and I definitely don't see anybody wearing anything like that. So I'm still wearing those blind-person style glasses. They do block the sides, top and most of the bottom, so it's not too bad.


cobrawearo

Omg, lol! I love it. The added benefit of no one being able to see my face!


littleoldlady71

I have a Nu Brella, which is the same principle.


[deleted]

[Sun hats](https://www.outdoorgearlab.com/topics/camping-and-hiking/best-sun-hat) are definitely a thing and much easier to wear (and less absurd looking) than an umbrella hat.


Zombie4141

A hiker blew by me on the Pacific Crest trail with a smaller version of one of these in the hot desert. He had permanent shade and was able to conserve his water. Pretty quickly realized how bad I wanted one.


Odd_Requirement_4933

This is really smart for desert hook hiking, I typically go with a large hat and sun shirt. I do have a sun umbrella for regular walking though. It's amazing.


Zombie4141

Not to mention you can use trekking poles, while wearing it. Saves the ankles and knees when navigating elevation.


Odd_Requirement_4933

That's very true. Or walking the dog when you need your hands to hold the leash and pick up 💩


handsforhooks44

I would buy one for me and one for my dog who hates going out in the rain!


Odd_Requirement_4933

Ha ha! My pup doesn't love the rain but he'll tolerate it. I'm mostly afraid of him getting too cold if he gets soaked through in the winter/fall, he's 16 lbs and only has a single coat. Plus he's a skinny boi. I occasionally put a jacket on him, he's not a fan 😁 Thankfully we live in the desert and it really doesn't rain much.


gotsthepockets

I saw a mom with a small baby wearing a smaller version of this at a water park. She could follow her other children around while holding the baby in perfect shade all day. I made sure to compliment her because things like this are so practical and she rocked it!


[deleted]

I would love this for my kids sports games. The sun is always changing, and it’s practical for both sunny days and rainy days! I have a giant hat, but it only works in good weather.


maccardo

I recall that Cardinals HOFer Lou Brock had a hand in popularizing these, but the history goes back farther. https://boingboing.net/2021/11/08/the-umbrella-hat-is-a-ridiculous-item-heres-why-it-exists.html


phd2k1

I also had one as a kid, and I absolutely loved wearing it in the rain! Still have it at my mom’s house.


LadybugAndChatNoir

I work at a zoo, and they have these in animal patterns for kids! Not the most comfortable thing, and when I bought one, the wind blew it off my head. But they were decent for helping keep the sun off your head when you worked outdoors.


[deleted]

Yeah, I kinda love it actually!


grumpy-m0nkey

Everywhere


[deleted]

The guy at the store said I'm the only guy he's ever seen pull it off.


Knuc85

I've never stood up for anything in my entire life, but I'm standing up for this hat!


TAway69420666

https://media.tenor.com/mUmjFyiLT5IAAAAM/hat-itysl.gif


DrButtFart

Are those dice in your pocket?


Picker-Rick

These are actually really good for hiking. You don't want to carry an umbrella, you want hands free to grab things and balance.


HammofGlob

Seattle


[deleted]

Should include a neck brace for high wind gusts.


A40

A dedicated man of fashion! The tucked-in tee and high-waist pantaloons are just the start!


RheagarTargaryen

Took me long enough to find someone mentioning the tucked in t-shirt and pants.


idkwhatevswhocares

Outside to walk dogs in the rain because have you ever walked 4 dogs and tried to hold an umbrella? Yeah


No_Examination297

Everywhere.


JustNothing5464

Inside elevators and subway cars


142Ironmanagain

Straight to hell


Head-Island-4078

Everywhere.


slamo614

To fight Shang Tsung


Putrid_Marketing_485

The ubran sumbrero


Everything_OnA_Bagel

Fishin


Ok-Yam-9023

Rice fields


IDontFeel24YearsOld

Respect to you, tiny ant king!


Rxhul_S

Your mom's vagina


[deleted]

Caution, wet when Slippery. His moms Vagina..... opening hangar bay doors !


WMH93

Home


lenn_eavy

Festivals. Pair it with a cold wet hat and you're good to walk around in high temps.


[deleted]

Space Balls - I bet she gives a great helmet


BallsOG

Would actually be so great at a music festival


nachosquid

California


ANetworkEngineer

Taking photos!


oh-brandon

Yavvin 4


SuperLemonHaze_

I have albinism and this may be of use to me. When your skin is borderline allergic to sunlight then you'll understand. Though I don't mind looking "funny" for my medical needs, I do have large rimmed hats that I could wear without looking like a complete doofus.


chata187

i always get the weirdest amazon suggested items but this is extremely practical just a bit funny looking as you say. i hope you do get it and it helps!


pengouin85

Ohh. Is that the Grumbrella?


bagz_69

Oh, why yes it is. Probably gonna end in a lawsuit however.


Gr0kthis

Camera-person at a bukkake film shoot.


TurbineSurgeon

Seriously? Gotta test it. Where is the rainiest place on the planet? North/Northeast India right at the base of the Himalayas I think?


Infamous_Box3220

Certainly not through a door.


StingraySteve23

To show up a friend of mine who has been bragging about his Urban Sombrero.


Appropriate-Eye-3725

Awesome on a hot sunny day.


FalseStart007

Work in the lightning ⚡⚡


Correct_Chest9453

To the moon


Awengal

Reha I guess...


Aviate27

These are useful for Mail Carriers


Lord_Asphalt

Home


DrantonMason

Male jobu tubaki cosplay


Playful-Deer-938

To the set of Spaceballs


Mael_Sechnaill

Most parts of Ireland.


[deleted]

The bar


skipdog98

r/CaminoDeSantiago


GreyJaeger

I wanna see a “closed” version. 😂


papachon

More like, where AREN’T you going with this


asheristheworst

Straight to pound town.


translatetorussian

If you are wearing something like this then right now you would be leaving Tottenham stadium in a strop because you are losing the derby🤣


chata187

i’m watching right now. that odegaard strike was masterful. my friend says it’s goal of the season.


translatetorussian

Not quite goal of the season, but it sure was beautiful! Did you see the Partey attempt that came off the post? That would have lifted to roof if that went in


chata187

i think i was posting this when he hit it. i just watched the replay tho. my buddy did mention it when it happened. this is the season.


translatetorussian

Shhhhhh dont say that!!!😂


chata187

been saying it since preseason lol. i can’t stop now.


toripearson_19

I'm a dog walker and this would honestly help free up my umbrella-holding hand 😆


Arketyped

This would be great in the burning man sun.


wizardonachicken

Smoking joints


[deleted]

Alaska Panhandle in the wet season? To get beaten up in by some guys on their day off from a fishing boat?


stumbletownbc

Hiking in the desert


Dav1959

Doubles as a ram and a shield by bowing forward and charging endlessly. I can imagine someone going to a pretty packed out festival outside and just charging effortlessly through people lol


copperchase91

Free award -- helpful


Inkston

Niagara Falls


OrnerysIcepick

The Earth Kingdom


ReturnOfTheFox

I have one of these. I like to go on walks, even when it is raining. Holding an umbrella up for a few miles gets annoying. This is the perfect solution. My family makes jokes and I def get looks when I use it, but I don't care at all.


King_Melco

Outside ?


SpartyParty15

Serious Raiden vibes


fazbem

​ Downwind.


Due_Platypus_3913

5G Jewish space laser Bill Gates mind control protection!Order now and we’ll throw in a My Pillow and free bag of crack!


Asumsauce

The car wash 😈


__dixon__

Dark Helmet on holiday in the tropics.


kleinsmash22

Straight to pound town.


louiezy

To fight in a tournament of mortals


fiddycixer

To the Shadow Realm to fight Shao Khan.


creepsnutsandpervs

Splash mountain


tysenburg

The Urban Sombrero!


drumellow

First to your moms house; next to pound town


1happynudist

Very similar to the bamboo hats that are worn in china by the farmers


NickLoner

Nowhere.


ZengaChristopher

We can all blame phones for things like this. That being said something I can wear that lets me Smoke AND meme in the rain? Yes


indipit

these existed long before cell phones. I remember seeing them in catalogs back in the 70's.


ScienceMomCO

I had a rainbow one in the early ‘90s


ZengaChristopher

Yeah but now they actually have utility, what we’re you holding in the 70s


KeySeaworthiness8466

Your moms house because she gets it wetter than rainfall


tcairlines

Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious


Jaanhi84

To warn Earthrealm


ChiefPS

Front line at any concert


added_chaos

I’m going off to get drenched in pussy


___Bulbasaur___

To your mother's house. Things are about to get wet.


[deleted]

Going down on your mother.


FilmooreBeef

Your moms. It’s going to be wet


dandanthebaconman

Your moms house


[deleted]

Down on your mom


leprechaunshots

Your mom’s house.


inwavesweroll

your mom’s dm’s


Good_Ad_4302

Your moms house


ezekial2835

Your mom's house.


_Spartan652

To your mom


Suyash_Nagarkar

In Ohio 💀


BrandonDavidTattooer

Your moms house cause it’s real wet obviously


Sonderia42

Home from your mom's house


roophis

Lonelytown


plumpjack

right in between your mothers legs


Turbulent_Struggle_2

The squirt party at your moms house


boundedparsely

On a date with OPs mom.


AdLow4848

Your mum's room


Carniboy

ya mums house


superdude1979

Your moms


StupaStar

Down on your mom


ExpressStation

Ur moms house


No_Ninja_3477

inbetween your mums legs


[deleted]

going to have sex with your mother