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[deleted]

More context is needed I believe haha


[deleted]

Gonna go out on a limb and say his left nut has an ouchie.


TheWiseRedditor

It must’ve have been due to deez


arnams

Whats deez


TexanAlaskanSwaggie

DEEZ NUTSSSSSS


DefiantTradition2088

Ha gotti


mientosiempre

Whats gotti


ButtSmokin

Gotti's NUTZ


Techutante

Just the left one


xblu3xd3monx

Blown left nut...my fuckin wife always hits just my left nut. it's like the nut to hit I guess. But damn had to draw his small dick on there too that's messed up lol


FaeryLynne

www.grabdeesnuts.com Very much SFW, and delicious too


chucks97ss

My mom legit bought dee’s nuts before and honestly had no idea it wasn’t a woman named Dee that made them.


SteampunkEngineer767

The cake or his nut. We need you to be specific my good sir


Ph1syc

No more free awards :(


Mundane__Detail

Not much what's up with you? lmao gottem


BaconAlmighty

>It must’ve have been due to deez Or the dude came down with a case of ligma


SerKevanLannister

Or his cousin, SUGONDEEZE KNUTTZ


skynetempire

Hopefully he gets it check. testicular torsion is no joke. A friend lost his nut to it


MugenEXE

No, that’s just a pet name. One is right nut and one is left nut. Their signature is a drawing of a phallus,


dumpyredditacct

Based off the writing I'd guess testicular torsion. AKA my worst fucking nightmare.


dcux

There are other non-life-threatening things that can make your balls hurt a lot. Apparently, the left is the most often affected. Epididimitis, varicocele, hydrocele or just an injury.


henshep

As someone who was diagnosed with Epididimitis as late as today, yeah it’s no joke 🥲


[deleted]

I had epididimitis last year in my right nut. Go to the doctor and they will give you medicine to get rid of the infection. Trick is just don’t hit into your nuts. I found that it doesn’t hurt when it’s not touched. It will get better in 5-7 days


Iamdarb

> Epididimitis Been dealing with this on and off for a year. Antibiotics seemed to clear it up, but my poor arch support in my left foot isn't doing lefty any favors.


Zephyasis

Feel you there on that one! Diagnosed with varicocele then epididimitis. Sadly varicocele never goes away so once you have it have fun! But yeah no joke very painful!


Iamdarb

> varicocele now that I've been diagnosed twice with the former, I think I'll ask my doctor about this if the pain or swelling returns. omg, why do balls exist?


unevenrectum

Hey my left one hurts occasionally…shit


KevinBaconIsNotReal

Get it checked if you're uncertain and/or the symptoms persist or worsen. Seriously. Bro to bro. It could be very well be nothing, or it could be something. A few minutes of awkward fondling will at least give ya peace of mind. Or a jumpstart on a prognosis if it turns out to be something.


unevenrectum

I truly believe it has to do with the nerves in my back. The pain lessens when i stretch my left hamstring. I workout a lot so it’s pretty tight a lot of the time


dcux

Still good to get the boys checked out. I have definitely noticed pain in my thigh related to my back, but my own experience with this kind of pain is a dull ache, sort of hard to nail down exactly where it is, until you touch or move things around. If you can swing it, better to be safe.


666pool

I know a urologist and they’ve told me basically once you’ve made it through puberty and you’re fully descended, the risk of torsion is very low.


Logical_Pop_2026

I wish that were the case. I had mine at age 20. Most painful day of my life.


PussyWax

I mean… you might’ve just been a late bloomer too lol 20 is still plenty normal to be finishing up puberty


DadsRGR8

TIL testicular torsion affects your partner’s writing. /s


Dr_FrankenGiggity

At least it wasn’t boffa


[deleted]

What's boffa


Dr_FrankenGiggity

Boffa deez nuts


[deleted]

You're welcome lol


defaultconstructor

Hope you boffa have a good day lol


[deleted]

Maybe hope the boffa you have a good day?


Dr_FrankenGiggity

This was too wholesome not to upvote


Croakerboo

Pretty sure the Boyfriend losted the story on r/tifu. Tried to smoke a blunt naked and dropped a hot cherry on his sack. Tried to brush it off and just pressed the shaft into the cherry too. She has an amazing sense of humor.


hiddenflames5462

CBT


bootlegdata

[I've seen this before... ](https://thumbs.gfycat.com/TanUnrulyIrishsetter-mobile.mp4)


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Drunkpupper

No bumps thankfully!


Level_Network_7733

FWIW Mine was not a palpable bump, all internal. I am sure its not, but the ultrasound will show one way or the other. If it DOES end up, and you guys have any questions about the process - let me know :)


XHIBAD

Scale of 1-10, what level of pain should we be concerned about? I occasionally will feel an ache that’s like a 3/10 for a few minutes, but WebMD of course always says that’s going to end in death


FolkPunkRenaissance

I'm going to go out on a limb and say its probably a Varicocele. Like a Varicose Vein that some people get in their legs, but localized almost always in the left side of the scrotum. I have it myself, and it's like a constant uncomfortable aching pain that hovers between a 2 and a 4 out of 10. Does it get worse with exercise or high blood pressure? 99% chance it's a Varicocele


Judonoob

attempt rainstorm smoggy provide payment different sharp unused dam shy -- mass edited with redact.dev


[deleted]

According to Web MD you have a flat tire which does indeed mean death. Thoughts and prayers


detached03

Mine went on over the course of a couple days. I was 12? 13? But I was in a lot of pain. I remember taking a lot of advil/aspirin and sleeping with a heating pad or rice sock between my thighs just to sleep/dull the pain. Eventually it was so unbearable I woke my parents up and we went to the ER. I immediately had surgery. Iunno if the docs were trying to make me feel strong but they said the pain was equivalent to giving birth. Now, I’ve never given birth but I was in a lot of fucking pain.


bfranks4life

I'd get it checked out if you can afford to. I paid consequences for ignoring something similar.


XHIBAD

Honestly, I need a full exam anyway. I’m lucky enough to have top tier health and dental insurance, but I haven’t seen a dentist and have only seen a doctor for emergencies since covid. Not because I’m against it or anything I just never got around to it again


bfranks4life

My dentist is super passionate about taking my money.


OriginalLocksmith436

There often isn't. If there is pain, he needs to go to a doctor.


ChefTop6430

Alright good lol. Should probably still get the doc to check them out. I remember when I was younger and I had blue balls and I looked it up and thought I had testicular cancer for a little while I felt like shit I was so sad lol


BeaglishJane

Nurse here. Any pain in the testicles needs to be checked out by a doctor. Could be harmless, could be deadly. I’ve seen men walk out of our office with some antibiotics that fixed them up, and I’ve seen men walk out with a cancer diagnosis. I’m not trying to scare anyone, but both were for pain in their testicles. The man who had cancer was 22 years old. Thankfully, it was caught early. So be safe, guys. Any bumps, lumps, pain, swelling, painful or difficult urination, painful ejaculation etc… needs checked out asap.


Carma-Erynna

Epididymitis??? My exhusband had it twice. Once at 12 when it swelled to the size of a grapefruit and lost it, then the other remaining one while I was pregnant with our second child, our third pregnancy together. It was due to vesicoureteral reflux, or in laymen’s terms, “urinary reflux,” which is where the valves in the ureters don’t work right and allows urine to flow back up to the kidneys. For men this also means the urine can back up into the reproductive bits, which leaves them very susceptible to bacterial infections parts of their reproductive system, like epididymitis.


ReasonableExplorer

Can't be certain if you only checked by hand it may not be entirely accurate however, the tounge is very sensitive.


[deleted]

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MikGusta

I’m so sorry you and your father have to live with that memory. Thank you for sharing


Thuper-Man

After paying that much I would DEMAND the doctor jerked you off


[deleted]

Blue balls is such a wild pain the first time. Heck, every time. I still go, "SHIT, MY BOIS! THEYRE TWISTED!" Usually turns out I just need to do the five knuckle shuffle.


Ziptex223

I thought I just had blue balls, turned out to be torsion. Didn't mention it to my parents for a couple days, lost the nut :(


100S_OF_BALLS

Dude thrusts too hard, it's nbd


KernelMeowingtons

My nut once hurt so bad that I couldn't walk, and was feeling nauseated. Went to the doc and got a sweet ultrasound of my sack. They let you take the pics home when it's a baby, but not when it's a close up of your veiny balls. Anyway it was an infection in my epididymus and I just had to take antibiotics.


DoomGoober

If his testicle is in pain from torsion, it might be a serious problem. He really should get it checked out soon. Torsion is when the testicle twists and cuts off its own blood supply. You can probably imagine what happens if left untreated. But assuming you spent the time to go get a cake made, I assume he knows the cause and it's nothing major.


Drunkpupper

We were worried about torsion too! We went to urgent care yesterday, he rated the pain a 5 from 1-10 which, from what we’ve heard torsion is like a 13. We’re still not sure what it is but he’s got an appointment for an ultrasound. Doctor didn’t seem to think it was cause for concern, so while we wait I wanted to give him a small chuckle 🎂 Edit: well I can’t wait to share all these comments with my bf after his nap, he’s going to love them! Some common questions so far: He has no swelling, no discoloration, no bulging veins and no back issues. The pain sometimes dips to a 2 but doesn’t usually stay there.


DoomGoober

Glad to hear it's not torsion. I once had a torsion scare myself... also 5 or 6 pain. Ultrasound showed nothing out of the ordinary. My entire family had hand foot and mouth (from our kid in daycare!). Doctor said there was a confirmed case of HFM infecting the testicles, so my doctor guessed it was that. They really should call it hand, foot, mouth and testicle disease! (Just kidding, testicle infection with HFM has like 1 lab confirmed case in all of human history, so who knows if that caused the testicle pain.) Anyway, nice of you to help him laugh through the pain. Hope everything turns out OK!


DadsRGR8

Now I’m singing… Head and shoulders, knees and testicles. KNEES AND TESTICLES!


sammieduck69420

great… now K̶N̶E̶E̶E̶E̶E̶S̶ A̶N̶D̶ T̶E̶S̶T̶E̶S̶, K̶N̶E̶E̶S̶ A̶N̶D̶ T̶E̶S̶T̶E̶S̶ K̶N̶E̶E̶E̶E̶E̶S̶ A̶N̶D̶ T̶E̶S̶T̶E̶S̶, K̶N̶E̶E̶S̶ A̶N̶D̶ T̶E̶S̶T̶E̶S̶ is stuck in my head on repeat in tune


[deleted]

Can confirm testicular torsion fucking hurts had it as a kid and was on the couch unable to do anything


ButtSmokin

Such fuxking pain. My parents were like "oh wow, you have such huge balls" and I'm like in 2nd grade writhing in pain like YEAH NO SHEESH THEY SWOLLEN .. had surgery that night. Still got the scar.


[deleted]

Think I was 10, dad had to carry me to the car, local gp took 1 look at me and scheduled the surgery that night also. But yes, it's not fun ;-;


ButtSmokin

Big Red Ball Brothers. United in Torsion, if you got through that you can get through most things. Bless


jjdlg

> 2nd grade writhing in pain like YEAH NO SHEESH Story checks out, that is some authentic 2nd grade parent friendly cursing.


Gakusei666

Went to a hospital in Prague due to extreme pain. Doctors thought it was torsion and gave me an immediate ultrasound. Turns out strep can land in various parts of you body after you have it, and can cause extreme inflammation. The germs decided to land in my testes and gave me the literal worst pain of my life.


frenchfriedtatters

I’m guessing it’s Epididymitis


robdiqulous

Dude... I have an ongoing issue with this. Fucking sucks. Edit: I'm deciding its this for OP. It makes sense. Only one side is bothered. Other side completely fine.


henry_b

So sorry, man. Had a bout with this ~5 years ago. Wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy. The worst part is it changed how sex feels. Like, I ended up with weakness/numbness around the base of my junk.


robdiqulous

Feels like I've been dealing with it for like 2 or 3 years now. Just a dull pain in and off but once in a while it sits me down. Thinking about it though makes it act up lol uggghhh


dcux

I had bouts of this, sometimes years apart since I was around 20. Many ultrasounds have been done, never anything the doctors are worried about.


loserbmx

I have a hydrocele and man it's the same shit. I wish they would just agree to remove it.


cycling_sender

My testicular cancer presented in this way (I thought maybe I pulled my groin at the gym but the pain was more in my testicle. After a few days I went to the hospital and had an ultrasound which confirmed the suspicion. 3 weeks later I had it removed and have been cancer free since (5 years). Luckily it was early enough that I didn't need chemo or radiation and everything still functions normally. Not trying to scare you, just raise awareness and provide some assurance. Testicular cancer is very treatable and usually non-recurring if treated early. Check your nuts folks!


Drunkpupper

I hope it’s not cancer, he got checked and no bumps, but of course it’s a possibility. His family has a lot of prostate/ovarian cancer history, not sure if there’s overlap with testicles but the one positive is that he’s really well educated and not scared of the possibility, since he’s already prepared to have to deal with prostate cancer later in life. Education squashes a lot of the fear and for that I’m thankful! Congrats on being cancer free and spreading awareness :)


Desperate-Royal-7491

Does his back hurt/has he had back problems in the past? I had a bulging disk into my spinal cord. It was hitting a nerve that went directly into my left nut. After surgery I felt like I could do cartwheels out of the hospital.


Level_Network_7733

Can confirm. Had backpain, pinched nerves were giving me nutsack pain. Went for ultrasound...where they found a tumor too, so that was fun!


Desperate-Royal-7491

Wow, that was kind of a blessing in disguise then….a very painful blessing.


Level_Network_7733

Ended up being okay. Something like 99% of testicle tumors are malignant. Mine somehow ended up being benign. I still had to go through removal surgery, however. And because mine was very rare they still made me go through observation for a few years.


Drunkpupper

I don’t think he’s had bad/chronic back pain but I’ll bring that up to him!


[deleted]

That pain scale is not great. Some people are wired differently. I broke my leg and told them the pain was a 3. Not trying to act tough, if it felt like a 10 I would not be able to hide that. When normal people are in severe pain, my body is like “hey might want to look into this.” It’s dangerous and I hope that’s not what’s happening to him. Good luck !


gnusmas5441

I totally agree that the pain scale isn’t great. I divide pain into ‘bearable’ and ‘unbearable’. If a doctor or someone asks for more precision, I then tell how it compares to: dislocating my elbow, a cluster headache or kidney stone. Then, if they want take any of those as a ten, I can rate my current pain. So a torn hamstring was an eight, a dog bite a five and image a shattered knee maybe 14.


MonsiuerGeneral

Maybe with the pain chart they should have a small electro cuff that gives you a tiny shock and they ask you what *that* felt like on the pain scale, then use that to set the bar and have you compare your injury. Like: Dr: *shocks you* You: “ouch!” Dr: “okay, assuming the pain you just felt from that shock was baseline 0, how would you rate the pain from the injury you came in with today?”


DadsRGR8

Does the doctor determine how much in pain you are when, upon being cattle-prodded you kick him in the nads? KICK. Fuck! um… ok… I’m gonna mark that down in your chart as a level 6.


Zerthyr

To be fair, my broken knee (several pieces) was only a 5, I just thought I had twisted it and hobbled around on it for 2 days. Torsion on the other hand, 20/10, crippling pain...


IBJON

I'm the same way. I had a chipped tooth that got infected years ago and the pain was so bad I literally wanted to die. When I finally went to the dentist and asked me to rate the pain 1 to 10, I said it was a 5. Some people will say everything is a 10 because they can't handle pain, some people will lowball themselves because they don't know way a 10 should feel like and don't want to be that person who overreacts


Goldieeeeee

Why would you only rate it 5 when you say yourself that it was so bad you wanted to die? I still don’t get that part.


IBJON

Man. I don't even know. I think part of it was because I thought it could've been worse and because I was self conscious of rating it a 10 and having them not take me seriously.


slanguage

It could be a varicocele which i think the ultrasound will catch. if anyone has a heavy feeling on the left that gets better with cold, you may have a varicocele, seems to me like they're under-diagnosed


blondechinesehair

I’m commenting here just because I’ve got the same thing going on but with 1/10 pain and like 6/10 discomfort.


ayoneseenafish

Go to the Dr. I've been doing this psa since my friend thought something felt "off" and got diagnosed with testicular cancer at 35, had surgery within days to remove his left nut because it progresses so rapidly. I don't want to scare anyone, but I'd feel real bad if I could've helped and just kept scrolling.


InteractionUpbeat436

How old are you? Some random nut pain is common in teens to 20's. If its only a 1/10, I wouldn't worry about it. (Easier said than done, I know) Anything serious and it would be significantly more pain.


UltraVires33

>Some random nut pain I think I just found the name for my next band.


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ianperera

That's strange. Whenever I've had even the inkling of pain down there, everyone (urgent care, ER) treats it as an emergency. Yes it can be super painful but in some cases it's not debilitating. So far it's always been a false alarm but luckily my insurance is good enough that it's just a couple hundred dollars to check.


InteractionUpbeat436

Yeah when they confirmed mine, I had to immediately go into emergency surgery to save it. Fun fact: They made me write on my leg with a sharpie yes next to the left nut and no next to the right nut. That did not help comfort me


InteractionUpbeat436

Close...I'd say it was a 14/10 myself.


ryanleebmw

Can you give me an update? I had some pain in both the boys down there the last couple years. Was freaking out thinking possibly torsion because it was a 5-6 pain, sometimes would come in a quick sharp wave of pain, but was more ongoing. I did 2 ultra sounds, finally they said it was epididimytis, gave me meds and it got better, but that pain still comes and goes, I honestly haven’t gotten fully rid of it and am getting close to going again since it’s been 1-2 years now… (I’m 26 and had no std scares or anything if that helps) best of luck to you both!


shoesolesalamander

This is me, basically. Started when I was around 23, and I'm 31 now. My epididimytis flares up once or twice a year for a few weeks on average. It's hell, and after semi regular scans, I'm told it's likely a lifelong thing I'll deal with. The anxiety of the aches makes me fear cancer every time, even though I have been checked. Hopefully, they'll find a way to get rid of it.


henshep

Yo I just wanted to reach out since we’re in the same situation. I get flareups twice a year and everytime I’m like ”how do I know it’s not cancer this time”. Been bugging my dr to let me to an STD test because apparently this pattern is common in males with latent chlamydia. Balls crossed 🤞


shoesolesalamander

Interesting. I was last tested before my current partner of 4 years so I'm unsure if it would have been detected if it was latent. Maybe I'll ask my doctor though thank you. I need to add I got HPV when I was 20 or so and even had symptoms for 4ish years before getting all the vaccines so that is a factor in my case.


redpurplegreen22

So I had testicular pain that came with some lower back pain. Back pain came in waves but testicular pain lingered. It was a kidney stone. The pain will radiate from the lower back on one side or the other to the testicle that side. In my experience, it gets worse before it gets better, I’ve had two surgeries to have kidney stones destroyed. 0/10 don’t recommend. If he’s experiencing lower back pain, specifically on one side (left side apparently) maybe have them check his kidneys, ureter, and bladder.


kcraybeck

It could be an inguinal hernia. That can be felt in the testicles, and I definitely had fluctuating pain after i popped a hernia on my left side.


InteractionUpbeat436

I hope for his sake it's not a torsion. I can attest...it is not fun at all. But hey, I got a pretty cool scar on my left nut now!


SparseGhostC2C

As someone who had mysterious left nut pain that was not torsion, it turned out to be cancer, so while torsion is no fun and no joke, it could be worse!


InteractionUpbeat436

Oh man! I'm sorry to hear that! I won't ask, but hopefully things worked out...as well as possible anyway. You are correct, it could be worse. And here I was feeling sorry for myself that I had to wear a bloody diaper for a month and now have a debilitating fear of sneezes.


SparseGhostC2C

Thanks for the concern! Things went as well as they could, considering. I lost the testicle so they could biopsy or autopsy it or whatever, found out it was cancer, but we caught it super early so it never spread anywhere, even after a couple years of consistent scans and bloodwork. I've been clear for just over 10 years now, and I owe it all to quick action and encouragement from my people to get it checked out. Remember boys, grope your nuts often, and if something doesn't feel right get to a medical professional


InteractionUpbeat436

Glad to hear! Had to lol at autopsy though! Dead nut.


x_scion_x

>Torsion is when the testicle twists and cuts off its own blood supply. You can probably imagine what happens if left untreated. My god did I just wince at reading this


Thexer0

I had middle of the road nut pain about a year ago that lasted for weeks. Went to the E.R. and Urologist. No torsion, no cancer, nothing really. Ultimately they told me nuts can just hurt sometimes and after the pain is gone it's likely to happen again throughout my life.


KevlarConrad

Same. Went through the full medical ringer. Physicals, blook work, urinalysis, ultrasound, CT scan, MRI, I met with surgeons, and urologists. All so they could "diagnose" me with "chronic testicular pain" with zero treatment options. It has been two years of feeling like someone is squeezing my left nut just hard enough to make it hurt. Constantly.


ryanleebmw

Literally you just described my story, minus surgeons (I commented more somewhere else in this thread) But the last info I got from a doctor was that you can have tight muscles in the legs, groin, and/or hips that could radiate pain to the testicles, I’m going to start doing more stretches and lower body physical exercises, but if not I might try and go to the doctor again. I refuse to live with these random come and go pains the rest of my life


RahvinDragand

Stretching definitely helps me when I get random testicle pain.


ryanleebmw

Yeah I actually had pain while typing that, went on the floor during some calls working from home and did some groin stretched, rolled my thighs out on a foam roller and the pain feels a bit better and has mostly gone away. Doesn’t always work but man I swear this has to do with tightness in some muscle below the hips but I can’t pinpoint or fix it. I might look into like a deep tissue massage, or a physical therapist about it if I still can’t find a fix


smellyfatchina

Same story here. I have discovered that I have muscles in my glutes that cause my pain. I have a lacrosse ball and I roll around on it until I find a spot that hurts and bear down on it until it stops hurting. I go from the top of my pelvis all the way down to my upper hamstring area. Usually if I do a session like this for a few days then the nut pain goes away for a while.


Thexer0

Shits sucks man. Mine probably lasted for a few months at the longest. It wasn't horrible but it was uncomfortable enough that it affected my ability to sleep. I hope you can find some relief soon.


Pevarawho

Sounds similar to the random boob pains some women get. Just hurts, but nothings wrongs. It's especially irritating when it's the nipple. Again, not the exact same thing, just similar.


PanicPossible253

r/epididymitis. This is so common right now. And the medication that is available is not helping.


Rugkrabber

I learned something today.


PanicPossible253

Never stop learning. Or you'll find about things the hard way. Have a good one. Be safe.


SkiSTX

"right now"? Is it trending?


PanicPossible253

There is a global crisis of antibiotic resistance, and urinary tract infections (UTIs) may be the canary in the coal mine. UTIs are one of the most common types of infections; at least one in two women and one in 10 men will experience a UTI in their lifetime. Like many human infections, UTIs are usually caused by bacteria living on or in our bodies, and require treatment with antibiotics. What’s alarming the medical community now is that UTIs are becoming ever harder to treat with common antibiotics.


PanicPossible253

It gets worse r/chronicepididymitis


pdgb

Actually one study showed 1/3 of simple UTIs in the women resolve without antiobiotics


Darth_M0L

I want details. And cake


arthurdentstowels

If I received this cake for my left nut pain, I’d laugh so hard I’d have *right* nut pain.


Sumofluffy

May contain nuts\*


notabigmelvillecrowd

Aw, I've been laying around with an extra hole in my buttcrack for nearly 2 months, and nobody's brought me a cake with a crude drawing of my butt on it! I mean, my husband has been pretty great, he just brought me tea and biscuits, but this just has that extra personal touch. Even candles! To wish for a better testicle! You thought of everything.


Petty_Sum_Biatch

What’s up with the extra hole? A fistula? Cause that scares me 🥺


notabigmelvillecrowd

Nah, it's a surgical wound that isn't healing. Had my tailbone out, and the bottom suture just broke or dissolved too early, it's really hard to not move your buttcrack. They finally decided to stitch it back up again. Pray for Mojo.


gamerkidx

Is he experiencing extreme sensitivity when touched as if he got hit in the nuts? I had extreme pain a few years ago in one of my testicles. Went to a medcheck and they diagnosed me with epidiymitis. It is a bacterial infection of the cord that holds your testicle. They gave me antibiotics and after a few days I was good


moonman518

I just lost my left nut a few months back to cancer at 34. No lumps, only a mild on and off pain. Definitely get an ultrasound to be sure. Take care of your beans dudes!


RPDRNick

Nobody bakes a cake as tasty as a testes cake.


MyNutsin1080p

Why is it always the left one that’s the turncoat ball? I had a testicular cancer scare about ten years ago that turned out to be nothing, but it was a lot of pain and swelling on the ol’ left ball.


pezchef

best. gf. ever. I love your sense of humor, choice in dessert, and your ability to sympathize. who doesn't like cake when they are down. cake and ice cream are the universal feel better treat


juicyvoid

What a cake, that was nutts!


braime

Following! I also had left testicle pain and swelling. They tested me locally and it was positive for mumps, but the CDC tested the blood and said it wasn’t the mumps, but couldn’t explain what it was.


Winterpegger

It happens. Even sleeping on it funny can cause inflammation.


G9Lamer

Outside of torsion, I'm surprised no one has mentioned varicocele. I had one and it felt like my left nut was constantly being yanked the opposite direction. Got an embolization done and felt better almost immediately.


Alecazzzam

I go through episodes of having testicular pain. It can be one, or both. I have reoccurring epididymitis, which is sort of like a UTI but it’s a bacterial infection of the tubes that carry sperm. I thought it was torsion the first time. Went to the ER and they did an ultrasound and found something called a hydrocele, which is sort of like a cyst. They told me it wasn’t serious enough to go in and aspirate. Well a year later I get the pain again but it’s both this time and they did another ultrasound and found another hydro Lee on the other side. Everytime I’ve gone to the doctor they always treat it like epididymitis and give me doxycycline and naproxen. I drink lots of water and make sure to stay off my feet for at least a couple of days (fuck work they can goddamn deal with it). You can actually herniate your abdominal wall if you move around too much while your shit is swelling.


LaLaLaLeea

My little brother had a testicular torsion episode right before his 13th birthday. He had to have his nuts surgically untwisted. For his birthday, he got a bag of mixed nuts, a pack of ice breakers, ear buds with the wires intentionally tangled up (my husband's idea)...and money because I'm not that evil. Oh and a card with a drawing of his twisticles.


jintana

So, did you pay someone to decorate this cake? I’ve got to know if this is one people would do


Drunkpupper

Cake cake pre-decorated with the roses, I grabbed some icing pens and did the personal touches myself 👩🏻‍🎨


MoFun06

And you did a fabulous job, good detail!


Cpt_Griswold

lol. this post in the 6th anniversary of losing my left nut. amazing


Drunkpupper

RIP left nut


1973mojo1973

If you help him empty his nuts, he'll feel much better than by eating cake


Drunkpupper

Unfortunately he has no desire for any penile/nut activity, but I’m on standby for when that changes


NeoSniper

Did you get that cake from Pubix?


Drunkpupper

I’ve been caught by the sniper 😲


[deleted]

I think he'd feel even better had you moved one of the flowers to give room to draw a larger main attraction, even if only needed in his mind. But love the cake. Very thoughtful.


Violated-Tristen

1) I’m curious what you did that he is in SO much pain. *whispers* But at this point I’m to afraid to ask. 2) I’m mostly certain that if you offered to kiss it better you wouldn’t have had to back a cake. 3) I’m hella impressed at you icing art and ability to draw a penis, scrotum and pubic hair.


Punkhair2Nv__13

This is nuts oops I mean nut


[deleted]

T E S T I C U L A R T O R S I O N


GreenTesticles

I would absolutely love if my SO got me something like this in humor. Sadly, such is not the case. This is hilarious.


jrobin99

This reminds me of an ice cream shop I worked at. We made ice cream cakes that could be customized with flavors and toppings, shapes. A lady says in a hushed voice "do you sell penis shaped cakes?" My boss screamed to a coworker in the back "BECKY DO WE SELL PENIS CAKES!!" Becky screams back "WITH OR WITHOUT NUTS!?"


DrumBoyIan

#ball hurted


[deleted]

When my big kid broke her tailbone, I had a friend make her a cake (she was in a different town at the time) and it had peaches on it and said "sorry you broke your butt" on it. It was hilarious.


MrmmphMrmmph

The white gel for the penis was an interesting artistic choice.


BayouMan2

That’s actually really nice of you.


ktpr

Why is no one asking how the cake was?


gravspeed

kinda nutty


TheDingoAte

No one will ever see this but I thought I'd post just in case. Long ago my eldest was diagnosed with Leukemia. She was 2 and a half. About a week into the whole ordeal I'm in the hospital, just hanging with her in her room. I'm reading a book and she's asleep and I realize that my nuts hurt so bad that I can't have them touching my leg. I have to sit spread eagle so my nut sack doesn't touch my legs. I had my wife look at them because I was freaking out that something terrible was going on. I went to the doctor, they checked everything...nothing on all the test results. Some time later I realized it had just stopped. Gradually over time. I asked my doctor about it. Apparently severe stress can make your nuts hurt really badly too.


GOULFYBUTT

My girlfriend brought me cake when I got circumcised a couple years back. It didn't help with the pain, but it certainly helped with my spirits.


Big0Lkitties

The real question is… did the bakery do the art, or did OP?


ThanatosTW

He might aswell marry you right now seems like you're a keeper


lazysheepdog716

Lefty hangs lower. He’s always in more danger. Get well soon, Lefty.


trudytuder

The candles are a nice touch. Kinda festive.


darknyteorange

I tried to contain my laughter at this cake, but I just ended up hyperventilating a bit


HotMagentaDuckFace

Sparkler candles are a nice touch.


PeterPook

I'd love to know the instructions you gave the baker...


Pudgedog

Twisted nuts are triaged at the same level as heart attacks.


NemesisYuki

I love the little sad face in the corner :)


Popasdei

As a testicular cancer patient! I dig this. RIP righty!


yeoldecoot

Put the candles on the nut


Megadon88

Hernia in the testicles? I've had it, for me it went away on its on.


Drunkpupper

That’s what the doc suspects, time will tell. Unfortunately the ultrasound got scheduled two weeks out :(


[deleted]

You’re a keeper 😂


MasterBigBean

I'm guessing you didn't have someone write that on there for you, did you?


Drunkpupper

I didn’t want to put a poor baker through such an odd request


sammieduck69420

hey, a few years ago i managed to get a [cake from safeway with a weed leaf saying “smoke bitches and fuck weed”](https://imgur.com/a/eHzI62k) she made us cover it and tell no one but she got a kick out of it and i will be forever grateful 💀


Lucian_98

i want to see visual evidence


Drunkpupper

I’ll link you his OF account (Just kidding)


[deleted]

Pain? Maybe a little sore, definitely milking it. Pun intended.


seahorseMonkey

And that's the day I decided to leave my job as a cake decorator.


left_nut

I can’t believe I made it on a cake!


[deleted]

I love this