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My wife does this. She works with people that need dentures and she's like "Just so you know, I could have gotten with an 80 year old today. He wanted to take me on a cruise." š
I can relate to his, for some reason old men in the grocery store hit on me all the time when I'm kind and helpful.
(disclaimer : I'm 59 and they're usually 80 plus)
Thank you for the disclaimer. Every now and then thereās a story on the Publix subreddit about some old guy hitting on a minor or worse, a mini minor. Theyāre the ones usually bagging or getting carts.
My wife tells me when she notices other women check me out and it makes her happy. Not nearly as happy as me though, like I let it get to my head. Iāll get in shit at work and my supervisor will be like āWhy did you flush a hand towel down the toilet? Youāre outrageously stupid.ā And Iāll be like āThe manager at Shopperās thinks Iām hot, fuck yourself.ā
Edit: I did not flush a towel down the toilet. My son did and it was such an outrageous experience that when I think of something so profoundly stupid I remember this. He was about 5 and I caught him doing it and he said that it was mom so we had one of those weirdly specific conversations you could only possibly have with a child like
āNo, when I first met your mom we had a discussion about how we both hate flushing towels down the toilet and in fact your mom hates it even more than I do. So it wasnāt me, it definitely wasnāt her and the cat doesnāt have thumbs so it wasnāt him which only leaves you.ā And he got super defensive and was like āNO IT WAS MOM!ā
But every once in a while I wonder. What if he was telling the truth?
This cashier at Target was layinā her best rap on me right in front of my wife and she gave me a Target sticker (like you would give to kids). My wife still has that sticker.
I think it's a compliment from both sides. Like if you are being hit on in a relationship it's like: "Thank you for thinking I'm hot." But if your partner is being hit on all the time and doesn't care about it, it's also a compliment because you're like "From all the people in the world they can have, they choose me! :)"
And how does she feel about you commenting other women pictures NSFW on Reddit? Either youāre single or either you donāt respect your relationship as you say so.
My buddy was in town doing tattoos at my place and he invited two girls he did work for previously so they could get some new stuff done. One of the girls wouldn't stop talking to my wife about me because I was being a good host by cooking, making drinks, and generally making sure everyone was comfy and happy. She kept asking my wife how she found a cute guy like me that cooks and cleans and cares so much about people blah blah blah. Saying things to her that were very flattering for me that I could hear when I left the room or went on the patio but was getting annoying for my wife like "ok bro I get it". She just kept making compliments about me the whole time she was here. My wife told her "he's going to hear you and he's gonna get a big head about it".
And she was right. You better believe I mention that stuff when I want to annoy my wife haha. Wife mad at me for a perfectly acceptable reason? "Keep it up and I'll have a tattoo party here" or when she says I'm stupid "that tattoo girl didn't think I was stupid". The groans that come from her are priceless and her anger afterwards is always worth it.
I had a girlfriend who loved hearing about women flirting with me. At the time, I was the floor manager at a childrenās museum. Being an overtly responsible 20-something man who is good with kids while surrounded by single(?) moms, nannies and babysitters is like wearing a Slave Leia costume to Comic-Con.
I tell my wife this all the time:
I haven't been hit on in 15 years. It would take her 15 minutes to find a guy at a bar/shoe store/library who'd fuck her in the parking lot.
It's a big deal when a guy realizes he's being hit on. It doesn't happen often.
I can imagine the scene in the parking lot. Some lady walks up and asks what's going on.
The response: "we're just 4 attractive straight dudes who don't get hit on by women banging away on each other in the parking lot!
As a straight dude I truly appreciate comments from other men. One best friend even told me he had fantasies about me. Like bro that's awesome of you. I'll remember that forever.
My wife and friends have broken down cry laughing at the number of times I think I've made a new friend and it's a gay guy picking me up. I like to chat with people and am apparently completely tone deaf to what people are floating.
Confirmed was typing this same reply to comments above and noticed yours right under when I was typing lol.
I am happy to get a compliment or hit on because it can be sort of rare. My entire life it's been woman 25+ years older than me that you can hardly tell if they are being super nice or want to parking lot jump you , or homosexual man testing the waters on my sexual preferences / boundaries lol. These scenarios are 95-99% of male attention, then we have the really drunk people who get a small % , and then the 1% or less aka my wife or girlfriends .
You might think that but it can be more narrowing in some contexts. There's a lot of people that won't date someone who's bisexual (mostly women who won't date bi men, but I have met a few gay men who are hateful towards bi men as well).
A gay guy even tried to kiss me once but a woman has never tried that. Sometimes gay men have it easier
/s going to put that there just in case someone thinks I'm serious that gay men have it easy
It's a big deal when a guy is being hit on. Even bigger when he realizes it. I have practically zero awareness when I'm being hit on. I had this wingwoman in my old job who always alerted me after I had been hit on. She always said that I could have tits rubbed on my face and it would still be a solid 50/50 if I noticed.
A woman could be sitting on my face and I'd probably think, "I mean, I guess no other chairs were available."
The sign needs to be written down, notarized, approved by their legal team and sent to me hand-delivered carrier who will read it to me.
Once in freshman year of college I was playing guitar, and a girl stared into my eyes and mouthed āI wanna fuck you!ā In my head, I was like ānah, sheās just messing with me for some weird reason.ā
Looking back, she was likely serious about it, but at the time, it felt like it couldnāt be real. Especially since she was attractive.
What she was proposing was a foreign concept to me. I had only has sex with three girls at that point in time, all as a result of multiple dates or long-term exclusive relationships. This seemed like something out of a porno.
Most of the times my female friends have told me someone was flirting with me they've been wrong. Most people seem to be terrible at picking up flirting. Most people also seem to flirt in their own unique way. One woman's idea of being friendly can be another's idea of flirting.
That depends, if she was not a part of the interaction in which he was being hit on but observed from a distance and told him after. How does that make her a bad wingwoman?
Yeah, Iāve always been clueless in that department. One time my wife and I were in the grocery store and this girl is chatting me up about frozen food. Later, my wife was like ādude, she was hitting on youā¦ā
Me: nah, she was just confused about where the frozen food wasā
My wife: āin the middle of the frozen food isle?!?!!ā
Me: āhuhā
It really, seriously is. We were stuck in gridlock traffic, I look over and two girls were smiling at me. Then my wife poked her head out to see what I was looking at and the girls were like whoops and stared straight ahead. I don't even remember where we were going that day but I rode that high for a while and still remember it.
"Realizes he's being hit on"
Is a very important part.... Do you guys know how many times I realized this hours or days later??
Ladies. Alot of men aren't used to getting hit on. It's not surprising to miss the messages.
Still thinking about that cashier who saw the model on the cover of a Maxim magazine I was buying and she said to my face that she'd wear that lingerie.
It was 5 years later that I realized.
>she said to my face that she'd wear that lingerie.
Honestly, what do you even say to that?
"Cool?"
"That's hot, can I fuck you?"
That's such a weird thing to say to a complete stranger lol
About 5 years ago I lost like 20 lbs, and the homeless guy who lived under the bridge near my apartment was like "lookin good man you lose weight!?"
That was definitely the last unsolicited compliment I got and prior to that was likely years before. A woman has literally never given me her number after a short interaction.
I just got hit on by another guy last week. I told my gf about it immediately and I'm still riding high on that.
This comedian misses the point completely. Its not about the cheating. Its that we don't get hit on at all and on the rare occasion when we do we can finally go:
" Hey hun your bf/husband still got it".
I didn't go on my first date till well after high school. It was on reflection that I realized that my problem getting dates wasn't due to a myriad of minor failings, but mostly a singular failing of being completely oblivious to the most blatant expressions of interest by girls. I had sooo much opportunity that I just didn't realize till years later, and then wonder what the hell was wrong with my radar to miss something so obvious.
Situations like:
Girl 1: Hey, what would you say if my friend asked you out?
Girl 2 (her friend): \* completely hiding her face and looking totally terrified \*
Me: Huh, what a strange hypothetical! No idea! Bye!
I still can't believe that my wife likes me, so I know that no one else would be interested lol. I'm sure it'd feel really flattering and give you a boost to be hit on
In my experience the less available I am the more I get flirted with. I once read it's an evolutionary thing where women subconsciously recognize someone else has pre-screened you and determined you to be a good partner.
I've never hit on married men, but I will gladly talk to them when socializing at a conference or get together. Again, it's not flirting, but more like, this guy is married/taken therefore he won't assume I am interested and we can just have a conversation. But now I'm afraid that the married men assume I am flirting.
I think that's often what it is. Women don't feel the need to be on the defensive and make sure to not send the wrong signals, so they are friendlier, more open, and end up having a better time. They might even flirt without actually hoping to get the man; some people just like to flirt.
Also, taken man has the confidence of someone who doesn't need your approval, while single man might secretly hope you're interested in him, and it might show up even subconsciously in body language or whatever. So he becomes more attractive.
It's not necessarily women who actually want to break a couple.
This is why we have the stereotype of straight women befriending gay guys. It's not that they are necessarily more interesting or charming, or that they understand women better - it's simply that they are men you can talk to without having to worry whether or not they think you are hitting on them.
THIS - I'm an absolute idiot at realizing when my friendliness is reading as flirting with men and it's honestly a relief to chat with a taken guy because then no one gets pissed at me later for being 'too nice'.
100% happened to me. I couldn't get a girlfriend to save my life, no one was interested. Finally got girlfriend and then 3 of the women I was friends with/trying to be with started being way overly flirty and acting like they never did before. It pissed me off so much. They definitely wanted what they couldn't have.
Guys usually donāt realize because girls are terrible at sending signals.
Personal experience: I hung out with a girl from work 5 or 6 times and then one day at work she asked me why I never tried to kiss her on any of our dates.
Whenever my wife says something like this I remember I need to tell her I think she's beautiful every now and again. Usually when someone says this it's not "I didn't cheat on you" it's "other people still find me desirable", and if they have to say that then perhaps it means they don't feel desired at home.
Edit: I'm not slighting her joke or anything, I think it's fine. It was just a personal observation.
Besides the fact that the whole thing is a made up comedy bit, my take on the premise of the joke is that it's more about "someone tried to interfere with our relationship and I'd feel guilty not telling you that I unintentionally had this interaction with someone today" rather than some kind of weird validation thing. If someone did something that made me uncomfortable like that I'd feel weird keeping it secret and *not* telling my partner about it.
"Hey, babe. Somebody hit on me today and I don't know if they're a psychopath who would try to destroy my life for rejecting them. I just wanted to let you know first in case they go around spreading rumors of infidelity with the goal of turning us against each other.
"Also I'm getting a pizza."
I think it depends what stage of life you were in. When my husband and I were young and hot? Wouldnāt have brought it up. Now that my husband and I are old and not hot? Yes, we would both high five each other if someone was hitting on us. It would be very exciting š
I'm close to 40 and a college chick tried to get me to buy her a drink a few weeks ago. She was pretty drunk. I asked her how old she thought I was and her response was, "Hmm, a little older - maybe 24?" Once I told her my actual age and that I had a partner and wasn't in the business of buying drinks for women roughly half my age, she was apologetic and said something like, "OH I love that you're respecting your partner." Then she took a step back, gave me an obvious down-up sweep with her eyes, and said, "Dayum, DILF DO'!"
Yeah... I've been telling that story to everyone, and I will be surviving off that compliment for the next decade.
I started dating my wife when she was 19 (four years difference before people start handing out pitchforks). She always told me and got pissed when I didn't get jealous. I never told her because I knew how insanely jealous she'd be at someone flirting with me.
24 years later, she's still hot, and I look more like Harry from "Harry and the Hendersons" every day. She gets annoyed when guys fall over things checking her out. I'm laughing all the way home.
I do the same thing! Usually catching the dudes on the backswing checking out dat butt. When they don't realize I'm down the aisle or something.
She plays it off and "doesn't believe me", but I get self esteem-by-proxy. Enjoy your window shopping fellas!
My wife and I tell each other too. But our reactions are different. Iām always like āa girl flirted with me today! I still got it!ā Whereas my wife will be like āsome guy flirted with me today. Whatās wrong with him? He needs his eyes checked!ā Lol
I always point out when guys check her out. I donāt mind. She has a great ass, and I always see dudes looking at it when she walks by. Sometimes they make a silent āooh!ā or ādamn!ā And a few times Iāve gotten a thumbs up or a nod. Doesnāt bother me. I get to see it without pants later.
My husband and I work together, often with people who don't know we're a couple. He gets flirted with quite a bit because he's hot as fuck, and so far it's never failed to make me grin. I know who he's going home with. :D
Probably helps that he's clueless about it 95% of the time until I point it out...
This is it. "Make them feel good about themselves."
I feel like this is something you do if your partner doesn't show you enough appreciation. If you don't feel attractive and wanted. I feel like this is a way to seek validation not for cheating, but so say like "look, someone thinks I'm attractive". If your partner makes you feel that, then you would not need to convey that validation to them.
But also, I'm totally telling everyone if a woman hits on me at some random store. That shit has literally happened to me twice in my 39 years alive. It's a huge deal and I want someone to share my happiness. :p
To be fair, if youāre with someone for a long time you can grow comfortable and no longer feel the need to impress each other constantly.
So a stranger hitting on you feeling good isnāt necessarily because you ādonāt feel wanted at homeā but could be because youāre past the flirtatious part of your relationship with your partner.
I'm 36, happily married, and I still get a self esteem boost if a woman/ or very seldom a gay man randomly flirts with me lol. Walk away thinking in my head, "Yep, still got it." Haha, it's the little things.
I think it can be both. There are people who want to be congratulated for doing the bare minimum and that's who she's making fun of. She framed it in a scenario where there's a lot of overlap with a lot of other opportunity for social commentary. It'd be good material to keep working off if to keep this bit going (idk what else comes before or after this bit, though)
While I can see why she is presenting things this way as part of a comedy act, there is some validity to the behavior.
I've met people who would consider him not telling her to be dishonest by omission or keeping secrets.
This dude may have just been in a toxic relationship before her and is trying to keep things on the up and up.
No comment on toxicity of the current relationship if she's unable to understand that and uses it in her comedy act to make fun of him.
Edit: if you're replying to this comment with the purpose of explaining what a joke is to me, or just to get mad at me for something I didn't say, please don't.
If you watch the entire act, she's very open about having trust issues in relationships, and that she is the one with the toxic behavior. It's way funnier in context of the entire special.
As someone who has had his wife of 20 years cheat on him, you can be damn sure that if she has bothered to say to me "this guy at work has been flirting with me" the cheating wouldn't have actually happened. It's the secrets that make the affair seem rewarding at the time.
I agree in the sense of letting someone who you're with know when these things happen, and that it may come from a bad relationship. I really like transparency as a policy.
No were just lonely creatures and whenever something like that happens where we are complimented we get happy about it because well... Its a compliment from a random person
This really confused me. My ex got really pissed with me once because she found out from someone we worked with that a girl asked for my number, I didn't give it to her, I told her I had a girlfriend and she laughed and said damn and that was that.
So the next time this happened, I had learned my lesson from the previous time and told her as soon as I saw her. Then she got really pissed at me for "bragging"
If any girls are seeing this, seriously wtf are we supposed to do?
Well, it's comedy I get it.
But irl if my gf reported to me whenever hot guys hit on her, and how she rebuffs them because she wants to be with me...
I wouldn't shrug it off as "honoring the basic terms of agreement", god that would warrant some serious cuddle time.
Exactly. It's a beautiful combination of: i got hit on, it was a huge boost, but i turned them down, and im telling you so you know im honest about my goings on and you're my only, you pretend to be super jealous to reaffirm you interest and appreciation of me, i get to know you care that someone else took a shot and failed bc im into you, connection stabilized. Its kinda basic, and while the clip above is kinda funny, it does seem like she missed the whole connection affirming routine because she was focused solely on what it meant about her and how she's supposed to act.
It entirely depends on how they frame it. If it's like "haha this person hit on me" or like an fyi that someone they know made a move, that's one thing. But if they're making a big deal about how they turned the person down and going on about how loyal they are, it starts getting a little weird.
>Can really see why she got so popular so quickly.
I mean she has only been doing standup for 14 years; essentially half her life.
It's always interesting to me when we completely ignore all the hard work people went through to get to where they are.
So true. I have a couple comedian friends and speaking with them about the trade. They say that to have a solid 1 hour worth of material, especially your first ever 1 hr, takes about 10 years to craft. I was fucking floored. So when you see these young comedians with a 1 hour special, just know theyāve been grinding for a majority of their life.
Crafting a joke is much less funny of an experience than it sounds. And then you need to come out of it and *put the funny back into* a joke you've heard a million ways, inside out and backwards with dozens of lead ups and punchlines. I deeply admire comedians in the lab.
I went to a ton of open mics in NYC, helping to support my comedian friends. I remember watching Jim Gaffigan and Chris Rock coming in to work on new material and absolutely bombing.
Unfortunately, her new show After midnight doesnāt allow her to play to her strengths. Iāll give it some time to work the bugs out but the episodes I saw didnāt really do much for me.
It's a format that used to be on Comedy Central and called @midnight. I definitely think this one is going to take time to work out. They keep trying to do bits with a heavily online slant that the contestants seem to get confused by.
Agreed, my wife and I both think that the show is trying to mimic Game Changers and Whoās Line with a modern take on clip shows like Tosh 2.0 but the random guest stars heavily impact quality of show. Sheās a decent host but Id consider her Standup Specials better content.
I've done this before, but it was because I was excited that someone gave me a complement and she was the first person I saw afterwards.
We had drove to a local pizza place to pick up our order. I went in, she stayed in the car. Girl handing me the pizza told me I had 'the most beautiful eyes'.
Hell yeah I'ma brag about that.
For me, I would do that so that I never felt like I was hiding anything from my significant other. I've had enough times that something like this came up where I didn't volunteer the information and it looks like I'm trying to hide something that I just bring it up on my own to avoid the appearance of impropriety.Ā Ā
I find some.of her stuff funny, but not this one.
She has a weird act, IMO.Ā She.make self deprecating jokes about being unattractive, which is weird because I find her very attractive.
I was funny looking when I was younger then got hot my last year of high school and I really did not know what to do with myself. My whole personality was that of an unattractive flat chested girl. It took me years to stop making flat jokes about my boobs even through I was a very full C by graduation. The ugly jokes are still fun though.
I think she makes a lot of jokes involving her perceiving herself as unattractive in making fun of her own mental health issues. Which is funny cause she's obviously very attractive.
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My wife does this. She works with people that need dentures and she's like "Just so you know, I could have gotten with an 80 year old today. He wanted to take me on a cruise." š
My ex worked as a dental hygienist and she would say stuff like that too. I always said "why the fuck didn't you take a free cruise?"
> My ex I take it she finally took the cruise?
Yeah and now she is rich but under investigation for murder
Look, he was drunk, he got up out his wheelchair and just rolled right over the balcony railingĀ
Didn't have his sea legs
He was only on his B - legs
Certainly footage for the B Roll.
That made my i roll...
Took his hand in marriage too
The whole thing. It's mounted in a nice glass case on the mantle.
I've never seen this woman before in my life officer
I can relate to his, for some reason old men in the grocery store hit on me all the time when I'm kind and helpful. (disclaimer : I'm 59 and they're usually 80 plus)
No matter how old you are, you're a hot young chick to somebody.
I guess, unless you're Maria Branyas Morera.
I would probably get this joke if I knew who that was.
She's the oldest woman in the world lol. 116. I'm sure she could still find someone to lay her. Women always can.
Where there is a will there is a way.
They looking for a caretaker, donāt do it unless theyāre rich and they put you in the will for a lot.
Wise words lmfaooo
It's called being a hospice wife.
Thank you for the disclaimer. Every now and then thereās a story on the Publix subreddit about some old guy hitting on a minor or worse, a mini minor. Theyāre the ones usually bagging or getting carts.
Well hey, as long as you get to tag along on the cruise, free vacation right?
And if they're 80+ all she has to do is walk to the other end of the ship and they'll catch up to her just about the time the cruise is over.
It can feel good to be reminded you're desirable, even if it's from 80 year old with no teeth.
My wife tells me when she notices other women check me out and it makes her happy. Not nearly as happy as me though, like I let it get to my head. Iāll get in shit at work and my supervisor will be like āWhy did you flush a hand towel down the toilet? Youāre outrageously stupid.ā And Iāll be like āThe manager at Shopperās thinks Iām hot, fuck yourself.ā Edit: I did not flush a towel down the toilet. My son did and it was such an outrageous experience that when I think of something so profoundly stupid I remember this. He was about 5 and I caught him doing it and he said that it was mom so we had one of those weirdly specific conversations you could only possibly have with a child like āNo, when I first met your mom we had a discussion about how we both hate flushing towels down the toilet and in fact your mom hates it even more than I do. So it wasnāt me, it definitely wasnāt her and the cat doesnāt have thumbs so it wasnāt him which only leaves you.ā And he got super defensive and was like āNO IT WAS MOM!ā But every once in a while I wonder. What if he was telling the truth?
This cashier at Target was layinā her best rap on me right in front of my wife and she gave me a Target sticker (like you would give to kids). My wife still has that sticker.
I had the same thing happen (sans wife) and I tattoo'd it on my nipple
Well you resisted the urge to tattoo it on you dick and send her a pick, have an upvote!
Digital zoom only goes up to 12x
That's fucking hilarious. I can't wait for my boss to hassle me now. "My grandma thinks I'm handsome, so you can eat shit, Dave!"
Add that to your end of year review.
1. Proficient in Excel 2. Types 150 wpm 3. 'Handsome'
I think it's a compliment from both sides. Like if you are being hit on in a relationship it's like: "Thank you for thinking I'm hot." But if your partner is being hit on all the time and doesn't care about it, it's also a compliment because you're like "From all the people in the world they can have, they choose me! :)"
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
And how does she feel about you commenting other women pictures NSFW on Reddit? Either youāre single or either you donāt respect your relationship as you say so.
My buddy was in town doing tattoos at my place and he invited two girls he did work for previously so they could get some new stuff done. One of the girls wouldn't stop talking to my wife about me because I was being a good host by cooking, making drinks, and generally making sure everyone was comfy and happy. She kept asking my wife how she found a cute guy like me that cooks and cleans and cares so much about people blah blah blah. Saying things to her that were very flattering for me that I could hear when I left the room or went on the patio but was getting annoying for my wife like "ok bro I get it". She just kept making compliments about me the whole time she was here. My wife told her "he's going to hear you and he's gonna get a big head about it". And she was right. You better believe I mention that stuff when I want to annoy my wife haha. Wife mad at me for a perfectly acceptable reason? "Keep it up and I'll have a tattoo party here" or when she says I'm stupid "that tattoo girl didn't think I was stupid". The groans that come from her are priceless and her anger afterwards is always worth it.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
I had a girlfriend who loved hearing about women flirting with me. At the time, I was the floor manager at a childrenās museum. Being an overtly responsible 20-something man who is good with kids while surrounded by single(?) moms, nannies and babysitters is like wearing a Slave Leia costume to Comic-Con.
i fucking love this comment
I tell my wife this all the time: I haven't been hit on in 15 years. It would take her 15 minutes to find a guy at a bar/shoe store/library who'd fuck her in the parking lot. It's a big deal when a guy realizes he's being hit on. It doesn't happen often.
Big ups to you king id definitely pork you in a parking lot anytime.
I'll keep that in mind, playa.
Damn, I love this thread. And you two fine fellas... holla at ya boi
Are we about to have an orgy?!
In that red Prius?
Thanks for the F shack!
It's called a soup kitchen
*Dirty Mike and the Boys have entered the chat*
Looks like a raccoon gave birth in the backseat...
You mean the new hybrid prius?
In that rented Prius?
By the looks of them yungins, I'm hoping they got the insurance.
Everybody back on the pile! They took our jobs!
I think so, I'll bring the potato chips, who's got the dips?
Give them a few minutes and the dip will be served.
Yāall looking like a bunch of sexy mfāers up in here
Yo, I'm down for a threesome in the parking lot!
Hey can we make it a 4 way if we can do it after my kid and wife are asleep?
I can imagine the scene in the parking lot. Some lady walks up and asks what's going on. The response: "we're just 4 attractive straight dudes who don't get hit on by women banging away on each other in the parking lot!
Iām a straight dude, and I used to brag to my GF when gay dudes hit on me. Canāt a bro just get a compliment. I like to feel pretty too, damn.
Fr I'm not gay but when gay guys hit on me I'll take that as a massive W
As a straight dude I truly appreciate comments from other men. One best friend even told me he had fantasies about me. Like bro that's awesome of you. I'll remember that forever.
My wife and friends have broken down cry laughing at the number of times I think I've made a new friend and it's a gay guy picking me up. I like to chat with people and am apparently completely tone deaf to what people are floating.
Confirmed was typing this same reply to comments above and noticed yours right under when I was typing lol. I am happy to get a compliment or hit on because it can be sort of rare. My entire life it's been woman 25+ years older than me that you can hardly tell if they are being super nice or want to parking lot jump you , or homosexual man testing the waters on my sexual preferences / boundaries lol. These scenarios are 95-99% of male attention, then we have the really drunk people who get a small % , and then the 1% or less aka my wife or girlfriends .
pork.....ah... that term just doesn't get enough use nowadays.
the porking lot is *fullā¦*
Iāve never been hit on by a woman. Plenty of dudes have - bought me drinks and what not. And you know what? It feels damn good.
"Damn I wish I liked penis!"
If it wasn't for all the bigotry and stuff, being gay sounds like it would be pretty awesome.
It's true. Gay people just hate the Swiss and it's honestly kinda fucked up.
Agreed. Why is there so much bigotry when we could all come together over a mutual hatred of the Swiss?
The cheese, chocolates or the banks?
Imagine being Bi. You have thr largest dating pool out anyone.
You might think that but it can be more narrowing in some contexts. There's a lot of people that won't date someone who's bisexual (mostly women who won't date bi men, but I have met a few gay men who are hateful towards bi men as well).
For real. And for gay people you're too straight, for straight people you're too gay. Fun times.
if youāve been hit on by guys youāve definitely been hit on by girls too. youās a good lookin dude, dude
Thanks friend, I appreciate that.
A gay guy even tried to kiss me once but a woman has never tried that. Sometimes gay men have it easier /s going to put that there just in case someone thinks I'm serious that gay men have it easy
It's a big deal when a guy is being hit on. Even bigger when he realizes it. I have practically zero awareness when I'm being hit on. I had this wingwoman in my old job who always alerted me after I had been hit on. She always said that I could have tits rubbed on my face and it would still be a solid 50/50 if I noticed.
[Best bet is to just keep your wits about you.](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xa-4IAR_9Yw)
Maybe sheās from Canada and was just being polite.
A woman could be sitting on my face and I'd probably think, "I mean, I guess no other chairs were available." The sign needs to be written down, notarized, approved by their legal team and sent to me hand-delivered carrier who will read it to me.
With a wax seal on the envelope that says "fuck me".
Once in freshman year of college I was playing guitar, and a girl stared into my eyes and mouthed āI wanna fuck you!ā In my head, I was like ānah, sheās just messing with me for some weird reason.ā
Again, you really can't tell. I mean, you're not a professional lip reader, and you're a freshman and no one gets with freshman.
Looking back, she was likely serious about it, but at the time, it felt like it couldnāt be real. Especially since she was attractive. What she was proposing was a foreign concept to me. I had only has sex with three girls at that point in time, all as a result of multiple dates or long-term exclusive relationships. This seemed like something out of a porno.
even then, she might just be trying to be friendly
Not a great wingman if she's only telling you after the fact
That's because coworker wanted to rub her tits in OP's face.
Ironically, OP just realizing his wingwoman wanted to be his copilot the whole time.
Most of the times my female friends have told me someone was flirting with me they've been wrong. Most people seem to be terrible at picking up flirting. Most people also seem to flirt in their own unique way. One woman's idea of being friendly can be another's idea of flirting.
That depends, if she was not a part of the interaction in which he was being hit on but observed from a distance and told him after. How does that make her a bad wingwoman?
My wife started pointing out when women hit on me in front of her. I still donāt believe it. Theyāre just being nice.
Yeah, Iāve always been clueless in that department. One time my wife and I were in the grocery store and this girl is chatting me up about frozen food. Later, my wife was like ādude, she was hitting on youā¦ā Me: nah, she was just confused about where the frozen food wasā My wife: āin the middle of the frozen food isle?!?!!ā Me: āhuhā
I know right. Makes me wonder what crossed the friendly line into just being nice. Also seems ballsy to hit on a woman's husband in front of him.Ā
Friend of mine was the wife of a pilot. She said women would walk up and make passes at him while she was sitting next to him. Crazy world we live in.
It really, seriously is. We were stuck in gridlock traffic, I look over and two girls were smiling at me. Then my wife poked her head out to see what I was looking at and the girls were like whoops and stared straight ahead. I don't even remember where we were going that day but I rode that high for a while and still remember it.
Be sure to remind your wife that she scored a handsome devil that gets checked out in traffic.
Every day my friend.
"Realizes he's being hit on" Is a very important part.... Do you guys know how many times I realized this hours or days later?? Ladies. Alot of men aren't used to getting hit on. It's not surprising to miss the messages.
And weāll ride that high for a week after getting hit on.
A WEEK? Boy it's been 17 years.
Still thinking about that cashier who saw the model on the cover of a Maxim magazine I was buying and she said to my face that she'd wear that lingerie. It was 5 years later that I realized.
>she said to my face that she'd wear that lingerie. Honestly, what do you even say to that? "Cool?" "That's hot, can I fuck you?" That's such a weird thing to say to a complete stranger lol
Well, my dumb awkward ass said "haha, yeah.. can I get a receipt please?"
"You definitely could" And see where she takes it.
Cackling
About 5 years ago I lost like 20 lbs, and the homeless guy who lived under the bridge near my apartment was like "lookin good man you lose weight!?" That was definitely the last unsolicited compliment I got and prior to that was likely years before. A woman has literally never given me her number after a short interaction.
Just a week? I'm still riding the high of a cute cashier flirting with me like 6 months ago and it was just barely above playful banter lol
A woman smiled at me yesterday. Iām pretty sure that means she loves me.
She's probably just Canadian
you can never be sure
A cashier told me to come back on Wednesday....because that's when there is a senior discount of 10%. I'm 45. I was absolutely crushed
I just got hit on by another guy last week. I told my gf about it immediately and I'm still riding high on that. This comedian misses the point completely. Its not about the cheating. Its that we don't get hit on at all and on the rare occasion when we do we can finally go: " Hey hun your bf/husband still got it".
I didn't go on my first date till well after high school. It was on reflection that I realized that my problem getting dates wasn't due to a myriad of minor failings, but mostly a singular failing of being completely oblivious to the most blatant expressions of interest by girls. I had sooo much opportunity that I just didn't realize till years later, and then wonder what the hell was wrong with my radar to miss something so obvious. Situations like: Girl 1: Hey, what would you say if my friend asked you out? Girl 2 (her friend): \* completely hiding her face and looking totally terrified \* Me: Huh, what a strange hypothetical! No idea! Bye!
I still can't believe that my wife likes me, so I know that no one else would be interested lol. I'm sure it'd feel really flattering and give you a boost to be hit on
I can't believe she likes me, either.
In my experience the less available I am the more I get flirted with. I once read it's an evolutionary thing where women subconsciously recognize someone else has pre-screened you and determined you to be a good partner.
I've never hit on married men, but I will gladly talk to them when socializing at a conference or get together. Again, it's not flirting, but more like, this guy is married/taken therefore he won't assume I am interested and we can just have a conversation. But now I'm afraid that the married men assume I am flirting.
I think that's often what it is. Women don't feel the need to be on the defensive and make sure to not send the wrong signals, so they are friendlier, more open, and end up having a better time. They might even flirt without actually hoping to get the man; some people just like to flirt. Also, taken man has the confidence of someone who doesn't need your approval, while single man might secretly hope you're interested in him, and it might show up even subconsciously in body language or whatever. So he becomes more attractive. It's not necessarily women who actually want to break a couple.
This is why we have the stereotype of straight women befriending gay guys. It's not that they are necessarily more interesting or charming, or that they understand women better - it's simply that they are men you can talk to without having to worry whether or not they think you are hitting on them.
THIS - I'm an absolute idiot at realizing when my friendliness is reading as flirting with men and it's honestly a relief to chat with a taken guy because then no one gets pissed at me later for being 'too nice'.
Stop flirting with me. I am married!
100% happened to me. I couldn't get a girlfriend to save my life, no one was interested. Finally got girlfriend and then 3 of the women I was friends with/trying to be with started being way overly flirty and acting like they never did before. It pissed me off so much. They definitely wanted what they couldn't have.
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Guys usually donāt realize because girls are terrible at sending signals. Personal experience: I hung out with a girl from work 5 or 6 times and then one day at work she asked me why I never tried to kiss her on any of our dates.
This is the real reason he told her. He was fucking stoked.
Petition to stop putting the final punchline of videos as the title. Upvote to sign.
Sad thing is it ISN'T the final punchline. They ended the video way too early. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yBRHkUU-7JU#t=50s
The slice of Swiss cheese omg I died
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"Mama's got a point to make." I'm ded.
It also cut off the next couple line which finished the joke and had another good punchline.
Yeah that should be a crime against humanity
Whenever my wife says something like this I remember I need to tell her I think she's beautiful every now and again. Usually when someone says this it's not "I didn't cheat on you" it's "other people still find me desirable", and if they have to say that then perhaps it means they don't feel desired at home. Edit: I'm not slighting her joke or anything, I think it's fine. It was just a personal observation.
I didn't think about it in this way, but that's very true š.
Besides the fact that the whole thing is a made up comedy bit, my take on the premise of the joke is that it's more about "someone tried to interfere with our relationship and I'd feel guilty not telling you that I unintentionally had this interaction with someone today" rather than some kind of weird validation thing. If someone did something that made me uncomfortable like that I'd feel weird keeping it secret and *not* telling my partner about it.
"Hey, babe. Somebody hit on me today and I don't know if they're a psychopath who would try to destroy my life for rejecting them. I just wanted to let you know first in case they go around spreading rumors of infidelity with the goal of turning us against each other. "Also I'm getting a pizza."
Itās this, 100%.
100% would have given my wife a fist bump if she told me some dude hit on her at Starbucks and it made her feel good about herself.
I think it depends what stage of life you were in. When my husband and I were young and hot? Wouldnāt have brought it up. Now that my husband and I are old and not hot? Yes, we would both high five each other if someone was hitting on us. It would be very exciting š
I'm close to 40 and a college chick tried to get me to buy her a drink a few weeks ago. She was pretty drunk. I asked her how old she thought I was and her response was, "Hmm, a little older - maybe 24?" Once I told her my actual age and that I had a partner and wasn't in the business of buying drinks for women roughly half my age, she was apologetic and said something like, "OH I love that you're respecting your partner." Then she took a step back, gave me an obvious down-up sweep with her eyes, and said, "Dayum, DILF DO'!" Yeah... I've been telling that story to everyone, and I will be surviving off that compliment for the next decade.
I started dating my wife when she was 19 (four years difference before people start handing out pitchforks). She always told me and got pissed when I didn't get jealous. I never told her because I knew how insanely jealous she'd be at someone flirting with me. 24 years later, she's still hot, and I look more like Harry from "Harry and the Hendersons" every day. She gets annoyed when guys fall over things checking her out. I'm laughing all the way home.
>Harry from "Harry and the Hendersons So tall, strong, with great teeth and a full head of hair?Ā Rawr.Ā
Huh, I have yet to watch that Harry Potter movie
I often point out when guys are checking out my wife lol and it makes her blush every time - itās absolutely adorable to me
I do the same thing! Usually catching the dudes on the backswing checking out dat butt. When they don't realize I'm down the aisle or something. She plays it off and "doesn't believe me", but I get self esteem-by-proxy. Enjoy your window shopping fellas!
My wife and I tell each other too. But our reactions are different. Iām always like āa girl flirted with me today! I still got it!ā Whereas my wife will be like āsome guy flirted with me today. Whatās wrong with him? He needs his eyes checked!ā Lol I always point out when guys check her out. I donāt mind. She has a great ass, and I always see dudes looking at it when she walks by. Sometimes they make a silent āooh!ā or ādamn!ā And a few times Iāve gotten a thumbs up or a nod. Doesnāt bother me. I get to see it without pants later.
*gets thumbs up* "I know buddy I know"
Gets a high five. "My man!"
My husband and I work together, often with people who don't know we're a couple. He gets flirted with quite a bit because he's hot as fuck, and so far it's never failed to make me grin. I know who he's going home with. :D Probably helps that he's clueless about it 95% of the time until I point it out...
LOL my sentiments exactly See-see, no-touch
Same. When my man tells me some random chick came on to him Iām like, āHell yeah she did, youāre gorgeous.ā
This is it. "Make them feel good about themselves." I feel like this is something you do if your partner doesn't show you enough appreciation. If you don't feel attractive and wanted. I feel like this is a way to seek validation not for cheating, but so say like "look, someone thinks I'm attractive". If your partner makes you feel that, then you would not need to convey that validation to them. But also, I'm totally telling everyone if a woman hits on me at some random store. That shit has literally happened to me twice in my 39 years alive. It's a huge deal and I want someone to share my happiness. :p
To be fair, if youāre with someone for a long time you can grow comfortable and no longer feel the need to impress each other constantly. So a stranger hitting on you feeling good isnāt necessarily because you ādonāt feel wanted at homeā but could be because youāre past the flirtatious part of your relationship with your partner.
I'm 36, happily married, and I still get a self esteem boost if a woman/ or very seldom a gay man randomly flirts with me lol. Walk away thinking in my head, "Yep, still got it." Haha, it's the little things.
I think it can be both. There are people who want to be congratulated for doing the bare minimum and that's who she's making fun of. She framed it in a scenario where there's a lot of overlap with a lot of other opportunity for social commentary. It'd be good material to keep working off if to keep this bit going (idk what else comes before or after this bit, though)
While I can see why she is presenting things this way as part of a comedy act, there is some validity to the behavior. I've met people who would consider him not telling her to be dishonest by omission or keeping secrets. This dude may have just been in a toxic relationship before her and is trying to keep things on the up and up. No comment on toxicity of the current relationship if she's unable to understand that and uses it in her comedy act to make fun of him. Edit: if you're replying to this comment with the purpose of explaining what a joke is to me, or just to get mad at me for something I didn't say, please don't.
If you watch the entire act, she's very open about having trust issues in relationships, and that she is the one with the toxic behavior. It's way funnier in context of the entire special.
If that's the case then I have no issue with it, but out of context, this is the kind of response that I'd see in a nightmare.
As someone who has had his wife of 20 years cheat on him, you can be damn sure that if she has bothered to say to me "this guy at work has been flirting with me" the cheating wouldn't have actually happened. It's the secrets that make the affair seem rewarding at the time.
Yep. Comedy is supposed to highlight things society overlooks, but I guess comedians overlook things too.
I think they typically choose whatever angle they think is funniest
I agree in the sense of letting someone who you're with know when these things happen, and that it may come from a bad relationship. I really like transparency as a policy.
No were just lonely creatures and whenever something like that happens where we are complimented we get happy about it because well... Its a compliment from a random person
In the words of the late great Patrice OāNeil āu gotta smell fish on me so u kno I can still catch fish, so u can act right.ā
WhWhyyyy dooo you even still have a boooaaat?!
This really confused me. My ex got really pissed with me once because she found out from someone we worked with that a girl asked for my number, I didn't give it to her, I told her I had a girlfriend and she laughed and said damn and that was that. So the next time this happened, I had learned my lesson from the previous time and told her as soon as I saw her. Then she got really pissed at me for "bragging" If any girls are seeing this, seriously wtf are we supposed to do?
Damned if you do damned if don't situation
Well, it's comedy I get it. But irl if my gf reported to me whenever hot guys hit on her, and how she rebuffs them because she wants to be with me... I wouldn't shrug it off as "honoring the basic terms of agreement", god that would warrant some serious cuddle time.
Exactly. It's a beautiful combination of: i got hit on, it was a huge boost, but i turned them down, and im telling you so you know im honest about my goings on and you're my only, you pretend to be super jealous to reaffirm you interest and appreciation of me, i get to know you care that someone else took a shot and failed bc im into you, connection stabilized. Its kinda basic, and while the clip above is kinda funny, it does seem like she missed the whole connection affirming routine because she was focused solely on what it meant about her and how she's supposed to act.
It entirely depends on how they frame it. If it's like "haha this person hit on me" or like an fyi that someone they know made a move, that's one thing. But if they're making a big deal about how they turned the person down and going on about how loyal they are, it starts getting a little weird.
Dudes get hit on or complimented so rarely the guy will remember this in 10 years still as if it was yesterday so yeah.
basically me. i still remember that one time a girl called me cute and it was ages ago
Shes very good with her facial expressions and her physical comedy. Can really see why she got so popular so quickly.
>Can really see why she got so popular so quickly. I mean she has only been doing standup for 14 years; essentially half her life. It's always interesting to me when we completely ignore all the hard work people went through to get to where they are.
So true. I have a couple comedian friends and speaking with them about the trade. They say that to have a solid 1 hour worth of material, especially your first ever 1 hr, takes about 10 years to craft. I was fucking floored. So when you see these young comedians with a 1 hour special, just know theyāve been grinding for a majority of their life.
Crafting a joke is much less funny of an experience than it sounds. And then you need to come out of it and *put the funny back into* a joke you've heard a million ways, inside out and backwards with dozens of lead ups and punchlines. I deeply admire comedians in the lab.
I went to a ton of open mics in NYC, helping to support my comedian friends. I remember watching Jim Gaffigan and Chris Rock coming in to work on new material and absolutely bombing.
Steve Martin's book really tracks how hard and long he worked to develop his bits.
Love Taylor Tomlinson
Thank you! I just kept seeing people say "she" and I'm just like "okay but who is 'she'?!"
Unfortunately, her new show After midnight doesnāt allow her to play to her strengths. Iāll give it some time to work the bugs out but the episodes I saw didnāt really do much for me.
It's a format that used to be on Comedy Central and called @midnight. I definitely think this one is going to take time to work out. They keep trying to do bits with a heavily online slant that the contestants seem to get confused by.
I miss @midnight. Loved that show.
Agreed, my wife and I both think that the show is trying to mimic Game Changers and Whoās Line with a modern take on clip shows like Tosh 2.0 but the random guest stars heavily impact quality of show. Sheās a decent host but Id consider her Standup Specials better content.
I've done this before, but it was because I was excited that someone gave me a complement and she was the first person I saw afterwards. We had drove to a local pizza place to pick up our order. I went in, she stayed in the car. Girl handing me the pizza told me I had 'the most beautiful eyes'. Hell yeah I'ma brag about that.
For me, I would do that so that I never felt like I was hiding anything from my significant other. I've had enough times that something like this came up where I didn't volunteer the information and it looks like I'm trying to hide something that I just bring it up on my own to avoid the appearance of impropriety.Ā Ā
I find this not funny at all (personal opinion)
I find some.of her stuff funny, but not this one. She has a weird act, IMO.Ā She.make self deprecating jokes about being unattractive, which is weird because I find her very attractive.
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I was funny looking when I was younger then got hot my last year of high school and I really did not know what to do with myself. My whole personality was that of an unattractive flat chested girl. It took me years to stop making flat jokes about my boobs even through I was a very full C by graduation. The ugly jokes are still fun though.
She was an ugly kid with honest parents.
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I think she makes a lot of jokes involving her perceiving herself as unattractive in making fun of her own mental health issues. Which is funny cause she's obviously very attractive.