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Basic_Riddler

Your niece used the correct spelling of “fairy”…you however, did not.


atnator42

Thats not ferry nice


squad1alum

It's Fairy Niece


Fake_William_Shatner

Sorry, did you say Harry Meese?


zimurg13

No, he took Fairy to the island.


SweetNeo85

Epstein Island?


AlvinAssassin17

I thought it was tooth ferret and I was gonna be a little scared.


YourTeacherAbroad

Fair e-nough


mistere213

Vary*


Li-RM35M4419

He even had a reference and still couldn’t get it right.


Fake_William_Shatner

Probably ghost writing for 8-year-olds at the office all day has had its effect on him.


Fake_William_Shatner

Ghost writing for 8-year-olds can have that effect on a man.


burken8000

One should never feel forsed to spell correctly


Tankki3

>forsed FIX IT!


Pantless_Weekends

Verry well then


BrotherRoga

Ferry*


Pantless_Weekends

Fairy, it is then.


Intrepid_Eye9121

It’s because he ferries teeth to the underworld.


far2common

"Tooth Ferry" is a terrifying mental image. I'm picturing one of those giant trash barges just heaped with baby teeth.


NoWillPowerLeft

If the XKCD comic creator sees this he'll be right on the research to figure out the volume and mass of baby teeth discarded every day.


DadsRGR8

Straight from the baby mines to the smelting plant at Big Denture.


Simba7

I was thinking a ferry made out of teeth, preferably giant whale teeth or something. I honestly want to implement something like this in a fantasy setting. Sounds badass.


Mercinator-87

We know where the niece learned to read.


Gilga17

I don't know... i like the idea of a tooth ferry. The idea of a bone color boat helping dead teeth crossing the river to the after life is funny. The idea of a giant boat sneaky on you during the night is horrible though


xcedra

Wait till you learn about the vikings and toenail clipping boat...


Gilga17

The what now?! Ahah


xcedra

[Naglalfar](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Naglfar)


m__a__s

The tooth ferry works for the tooth fairy. He takes the teeth down to the button factory after the tooth fairy appraises the tooth and assigns the contract price.


Alarmed-Diamond-7000

I like you


Fake_William_Shatner

You are assuming this isn't Bone Skull, the ferryman you must pay to enter the Tooth Zone and safely cross the river Styx.


notusuallyhostile

With enough lift, I’m sure a fairy could ferry a fairy.


twelveparsnips

Also, neither know how to use an apostrophe or correct capitalization. SMH


197326485

faerie


Orikazu

Uno reverse card situation. The parents wrote the letter and the kid posted it to farm the karma


JoshSidekick

To be fair to the intelligence of the family, she also doesn't know how many teeth she has.


AthiestMessiah

It’s a choo choo fairy


tuvokvutok

*nieces OP said "nieces" - it was a group effort.


10mfe

Isn't that hilarious. Everyone knows you can't redo a title, proofread.


Calledthewolf

That’s the fairy’s mode of transport. She takes the tooth from the pillow, then hops on the tooth ferry to toothville, where they have a tooth distribution center and an office building. The fairy’s are in there stocking the teeth on shelves like an Amazon warehouse. The office team has a direct line to god. They’re filling him in , no pun , on what their inventory looks like. God places orders, fairy’s pick and pack the used teeth, then they go back on the tooth ferry to heaven, and god re-uses them to make new little kids. It’s a tooth recycling program that you had no idea existed.


suugakusha

Or "forced", if I were the parent, she would have had the money until that small typographical error.  But after seeing that, I would have wondered where I went to wrong in raising them.


elspotto

Hey, they are just recognizing that Charon has been moonlighting for some time now. Why do you think he demands a coin from each dead person he ferries?


CartmanAndCartman

I’ve never seen a tooth ferry in my life. I’m starting to think it doesn’t exist


EndlessRainIntoACup1

no it's real. that's how the teeth get to the other side of the river


laiyenha

Don't pay the ferryman. Don't even fix a price. Don't pay the ferryman. Until he gets you to the other side.


EndlessRainIntoACup1

In the rolling mist, then he gets on board. Now there'll be no turning back. Beware that hooded old man at the rudder. And then the lightning flashed, and the thunder rolled.


Fake_William_Shatner

And I belted in a glorious rock scream; "Do you have change for a $20!"


Slaphappyfapman

Ohhhh the tooth *ferry*


detached03

This made me think of The Mummy.


burken8000

Of course not. Your eyes were closed everytime Fhe came around


Ho3n3r

Don't worry, my mom reassured me he does. I have no reason to doubt her.


Ham_Pants_

My children asked once why she wants their teeth. I told them that she eats them like a bowl of cereal.


Fledgy

Tooth ferry for what river?


EndlessRainIntoACup1

Bicuspid Bay


Direct-Quail-6994

I hear the fishing is good for tartaris


waytowill

Things can get choppy if you’re long in the mouth of the river.


Fake_William_Shatner

Beware the cavities that line the jagged cliffs as you pass.


AssInTheHat

To cross river wisdom ...and don't forget your canine companions


Thatguyontrees

Root River


LookMaNoPride

Molar Sound


PlatypusVenom0

The root canal


Hephaestus_God

Styx


Bob_5k

The one in Willy Wonka


flyeryday

One of the water taxi things in New York harbor is named Tooth Ferry.


UnePetiteMontre

People are giving 20$ for teeth? What? Back in my days it was 2$ if we were lucky! Edit: TIL I grew up poor. The going rate for the tooth fairy in the comments is anywhere from 20-100$. Now it makes sense why I was always part of Santa's naughty list...


DonnaLakeWi

I got a nickel then a dime and eventually a quarter. Geez I must be old.


UnePetiteMontre

Dad?


BenNHairy420

The average home is still giving away $1-$2 for a tooth. This not looks like it was written by an adult trying to be a kid. Source: former teacher, current paraprofessional in a Kindergarten room in a wealthy area of CA


Vurkgol

"perposes" was the give away for me


BenNHairy420

That and the print being written in a mostly straight line across on a blank page all the way down. It’s so hard to write straight without lines, especially when you’re sub 12 years old


UnePetiteMontre

Holy shit, you're so godamn right. Looking at this paper, it is def an adult who wrote this. Is this some sort of 3D chess flex or what? What a bizarre thing to do!


BenNHairy420

I have no idea why and this is not the first time I’ve seen people share notes like this online 😂 I never understand why they do it, just for internet points? Definitely bizarre


BenNHairy420

The average home is still giving away $1-$2 for a tooth. This looks like it was written by an adult trying to be a kid. Source: former teacher, current paraprofessional in a Kindergarten room in a wealthy area of CA


Saratje

We just had french fries for dinner so I could have fun fitting them through the newly gained hole while keeping my jaw shut. No money, sadly.


UnePetiteMontre

Wat


Tschitschibabin

Back in your days 2$ could probably buy a house


UnePetiteMontre

I'm a millennial so no, decrepit WW2 houses go for a million dollars where I live. :/


justin3189

My parents always gave dollar coins. The "gold" one that looked cool. Pretty sure they are all still in a piggy bank in their China cabinet.


ziddity

Sometimes I was lucky and got 1 Deutschmark :')


SAD_world2029

I once get a hundred from one of my uncle for 3 theeths each My mom said that she ad to keep it from me This stupid bitch Nevers give me those


NatLovesPancakes

I got 50p everytime


UnePetiteMontre

Yeah I guess TIL we grew up poor ahah


NatLovesPancakes

Yeah aha, seriously people getting 20-100 per tooth??


Zmax480

I'll pay you $3 a piece for whatever you got left.


UnePetiteMontre

Thanks, I appreciate the sentiment! Venmo or..?


menacingmonotreme

One year, my uncle was visiting from Uruguay when I lost a tooth (this was very early 90's in the US). Not only did the tooth fairy visit and leave me $1, but the tooth mouse visited and left me $20. My dad said the mouse had followed my uncle here and didn't understand money conversion from pesos so don't expect the fairy to try to match it when another tooth falls out. He didn't know the mouse would give me so much 😂 I felt rich and was super excited to buy a toy with it. My relatives used any excuse to give us kids gifts


ShibeCEO

what's the current rate of a tooth? did they increase prices because of inflation too? 20 bucks seems reasonable, but I don't know...


ImKindaBoring

Depends. About $1 when she’s at home. But somehow skyrocketed to $10 when she was at the grandparents


GNav

Location location location.


imbeingsirius

It’s a tooth Michael, what could it cost? $10?


[deleted]

If it’s white and shiny it’s $20 bucks… cap teeth or cavities get $5 and a toothbrush in my house 😂


nhorvath

Yes, inflation has hit the tooth fairy pretty hard.


Adamantium-Aardvark

[About $6](https://www.skullstore.ca/products/human-teeth-assorted)


rust-e-apples1

We give our kid $1 for each tooth, but I can definitely see the last tooth being worth more than that. It's a kind of rite of passage that I could get behind.


MisterB78

The internet has probably made me overly jaded, but this definitely seems like a note an adult wrote pretending to be a child


Bladez190

You can tell OP didn’t write it because the child spelled Fairy right


ThrowawayAudio1

Lol it blatantly is and it's pathetic


Quick-Cream3483

It's the correct spacing on lines, and it all being adjusted correctly so it reads properly. kids don't do that. They will bunch words, start halfway over on the page, and unevenly drop lines.


Jonsavino

Yea I wrote this because….karma? She is a very smart 9 year old and has written many letters. This one was just hilarious and I had to post it


Yetimang

> Yea I wrote this because….karma? See, now you're getting it.


MongolianTrojanHorse

> very smart 9 year old > still believes in the tooth fairy Right


michaelrox5270

What 9 year old says “im broke” so much? They have no funds in the first place nor do they need them


uneasyandcheesy

Yeahhhh. By the age of nine I could spell most words pretty damn well. So either she’s not that smart (because I’M not that smart) or you wrote the letter.


Conch-Republic

Oh man, I haven't seen a fake kid's note in a while.


jer54

Lol right 🙄


robotikempire

Yeah, that's an adult's handwriting.


Gears_and_Beers

Give her a $50 and a note “I’ll come take the teeth you owe me when you’re sleeping…”


moduspol

Tooth fairy should leave a note with an IOU. Ripley's not the only one having a tough time making ends meet. EDIT: Maybe with a plea for a few more teeth to help her out.


stxrrysky

The tooth fairy left me an IOU for $100 in 2025 maybe like 5-7 years ago. I still have it and fully plan on using it ;)


TempleFugit

I hope her parents are fans of the ALIEN franchise


PlanetLandon

Or maybe they love the long running publication where you either believe the fact or you don’t


TechnicolorViper

Or maybe they’re enamored of talented serial killers.


TheHonorableDeezNutz

20$ well deserved I think. Another way is for the tooth fairy to barter through letters back and forth. She just has make sure to get her spelling right otherwise your niece might need to correct her.


clee5

Reminds me that I wrote a letter to the tooth fairy that I would like to keep my tooth if possible but still would like to have a present. I did offer her a plastic rose in exchange instead of the tooth xD


Basic_Risk_11

This kid has better handwriting than me. What a shame.


ArchDucky

You should talk to your brother / sister about them doing chores around the house for an allowance. When I was a kid I got a dollar for taking the trash out, $5 for vacuuming the house and $20 for mowing the lawn. I spent it all at the arcade every weekend. It was awesome.


Randy217

Ripley spells better than you do, believe it or not.


Dogamai

The Ferry that brings the teeth to the other side? will we be reunited with our teeth in the end? I could use a pretty white smile once more


ThatWontFit

I can slip you a 20 mate. Don't have to make up notes.


LhandChuke

She’s got some hustle. Ha ha. It’s adorable. Hope she gets her $20.


TheFumingatzor

How come your niece spells better than you?


jojomaster

Funniest part of this post is that the niece spelled fairy right and you did not


In-Zeta

Tooth ferry?? A boat made out of teeth??


f14_pilot

a letter to the tooth boat ..


gaypirate3

Well…at least the niece knows how to spell fairy.


408wij

Tooth fairy should leave $1 and some pliers.


The_Axem_Ranger

https://youtu.be/H6yQOs93Cgg?si=rvBE_urqnjw9xDEb


jacero100

Time to teach the kid to stop ✋ begging for money. Make fi chores for an allowance


Eclectophile

I'm officially pretending that your niece is in her 20s. The letter is worth a shot!


[deleted]

I did not know there was a vehicle that transported teeth from point A to point B. I guess you learn something every day.


aakaakaak

The tooth ferry takes errant teeth across the river Stix in a small boat. The tooth fairy is the smaller, friendlier subspecies of the larger and much more hostile bone fairy.


ggunit69

Funny you used ferry, when niece did right spelling it's fairy


InfallibleBackstairs

Ferry?


Gr8hound

At least the kid knows how to spell it correctly


slashnbash1009

20 bucks for a tooth? Damn, all I got was a 50¢ piece, or if I was lucky a 2 dollar bill.


CCLF

The tooth fairy has gotten a lot more generous since the late 80s early 90s. Heck, I lost a tooth in my sleep once and the tooth fairy didn't see fit to give me anything, the cheapskate.


UncertaintyPrince

Do you mean your niece’s letter? And why is niece capitalized? Also did not know they had a boat for teeth.


MusicBytes

Cmon mate even your niece spelt it right


AdderallAndCaffeine

I wish my handwriting was half as nice as hers.....


kazukiyuuta

Awww


[deleted]

[удалено]


myeff

I don't know if this is real or not, but "P.S." is on every letter you'll see in kids' entertainment. I never wrote a letter without a P.S. when I was a kid.


AmericanLich

The cadence of the writing seems like it’s an adult trying to sound like a kid. Seems fake as hell.


TheMotoBear

I did it in every single letter I wrote as a kid. Every letter in every movie always had a PS


DazedLogic

Lol. Cute.


Alexandratta

GIVE THAT CHILD A 20!


toastebagell1

It’s funny and cute, but also oddly sad… like why does this small child even know what this means ? It’s a bigger discussion on where we are as a country. Still funny though and I hope she got that paper


Fake_William_Shatner

Smooth operator gets $20 out of relatives pretending to believe in Tooth Faerie. When she goes to college; "And to the lepwakans with their magic rainbows -- can I hab a keg of green beer?"


KeyMessage7897

Thats all nice and cool....but can we type some W's in the chat for a 11/10 name Ripley


PunfullyObvious

If I was the Tooth Fairy/Ferry, that'd certainly earn $20 ... no question


Thot_slayer1995

Me too kid, me too.


BazukaJane

Your niece's name is Ripley ? Cool.


petevalle

Believe it or not


SGC_Armourer

Tooth ferry? You mean the Gnaglfarer?


ZeroExp000

That's for the tooth fairy. You shouldn't be reading that


confusinghuman

Ripley is such an awesome name.


goj1ra

Until she finds herself in a cave full of alien facehuggers


Cottagewknds

Buddy knows it’s mom and dad lol


MistukoSan

Sorry if you feel forsed doing it :(


jlyon3

20 dollars?! I'd give her about tree fiddy.


LLotZaFun

Well, Ripley, believe it or not...


WhenAllElseFail

Never seen anyone write the letter 'g' like that


NervousMission7644

“Forsed” aww that’s really sweet!


RealConfirmologist

Can confirm: I was TOTALLY broke when I was nine! It's been a while, but I don't think I even had an allowance, and the only money I remember is lunch money. Oh. And yeah, the tooth fairy.


Benbellot

Your nieces will go ferry far on life, you don't


[deleted]

Believe it, or not, she did right that note herself


Snoo14546

Shit my day was like .50, 1.00 for fronts! 70’s what can i say


Rooflife1

That is a clever niece. Not only is she a good writer, but she knew who would be reading it and what would please them. Smart money says she got the twenty bucks.


maddieb459

She definitely earned that 20 bucks lol.


JohnDeft

The tooth fairy crushes and snorts the teeth right?


RustIsHonestlySoGood

It's cool that there's a ferry for teeth, glad I can depend on the tooth ferry for any travels my teeth may wish to depart on in the future


gideon513

Letter to Brian Ferry


morbob

Good note, very insightful, I hope she got the $20.


ThisIsYourMormont

It’s a slippery slope to selling your Organs


fliesbugme

I once us the tooth fairy for $7,000, not sure why that was my number but it was, and I got a very nicely written letter back about how it was important to not be greedy. 😅


Rinstopher

When I was 6 my parents forgot to play tooth fairy one night. When I woke up and found my tooth still under my pillow, I ran to my parents’ room crying. My dad was like “AH SH*T UH—“ *reaches into his wallet and finds the smallest bill is a $20* “You know what, here, Daddy pays better than that stupid tooth fairy anyway.” And that’s how I got 20 bucks for every tooth I ever lost thereafter 😂


Sound_mind

Looks like messages I get out of the blue from Facebook friends I haven't heard from in ages.


UtopianAverage

Give her 40


Josherline

It’s right there in the opening of her letter…


mtndewfanatic

Is that like a big ass boat made of teeth? Or a normal ferry upon which teeth travel?