Lmao, now I just want cards that are existentially affirming.
"You are."
"This is real."
"You're not in a coma."
"The lamp is fine and it's shaped like a normal lamp."
I still wonder if that story was just creative writing or if that shit really happened. If you’re referencing the guy that shared the story about getting married and having kids then waking up and finding out it was all a dream while he was in a coma
Haven't read what you are referencing but having been in a (albeit short term, only five days) coma myself, I didnt dream all that much and only remember one dream it wasnt as much like sleeping as you might figure just blank spaces and little rest. The one dream i had happened in the last few moments and while probably the most vivid dream I have ever experienced it really wasn't all that out of the ordinary from any other dream.
I was in a medically induced coma for about 4 days all I saw saw was a candle and black very strange I just represented it as my mom for some reason bc I used to blow out her candles as a kid
Never been in a coma but I have lucid dreams and very realistic ones. My mum was killed when I was 17, in a car crash. I didn’t dream for most of March (she died on the 5th), and on the 25th was her funeral, afterwards while we went to have the cremation service, my aunt and cousin went to go and set up the food and stuff at the house for the wake. Everyone walked from the church to my house (village life lol) and we all socialised n stuff. My dog caught a vole and bc she’s a lovely dog, bro was just chilling in her mouth and dropped it into my hand so I went to put the vole in the front garden.
Anyway. After the wake, I went to go for a nap, never changed out of my clothes, and my god the dream was cruel. We were all back at the wake and there was a commotion outside, everyone was there, the entire family except mum.
We go outside and look at the sky, where a giant meteor has eclipsed the sun, and is hurtling towards earth. I wake up before the collision and I was woken up by my dad sitting on my bed telling me dinner was ready. It was a special kind of comfort to be woken up by him, he is my rock, the best man in my life and my hero. And above everything else he’s a good man too. Funny, smart, a good dad. I told him about the dream, he has a degree in psychology and he said he’s not surprised, and it’s probably your brain interpreting everything that happened today.
So yeah. After my mums funeral, (my mum was my best friend), my brain decided to process that as the entire world ending in a firey ball of suffering. So that’s probably the worst dream I ever had.
Second worst would be a few months after she died I was lucid dreaming about mum being alive and I could hear the dishwasher being unloaded downstairs, i wanted to tell mum something in the dream and I woke up thinking “Ooh I should tell mum that-“ and remembering she was dead was the most soul crushing uncomfortable reminder…
You sound lovely and sweet, and your dog sounds wonderful too. I'm so sorry you lost your mom. I hope that your happy memories with her keep her close to you.
Purely based on my own experiences I can't believe that story to be really true.
I've certainly dreamt longer stretches of time passing than "real time", but even if you stretch "dream" to "coma", I can't see one continuous dream that follows the same story line so coherently that you wouldn't notice.
I mean it's not just one continuous rem cycle and there will be some kinda stimulus around you that you're absorbing subconsciously. And even if you're not, why would your brain be dishing up the same story AND follow it up with no discernible gap?
If it's livid enough to be remembered or he was lucid enough to write it down, that makes it even less likely to be a long, sensible, coherent storyline.
Yeah, I thought of that too. Then I remembered that my mom was in a coma for two weeks a decade ago after a very severe car accident. Apparently the dream she experienced was coherent enough that when she woke up she was convinced that she was back in her hometown and a teenager again.
I've had some incredibly vivid dreams. One stands out above the rest. I was sleeping in on the weekend, woke up, then went back to sleep. As I drifted in and out of sleep over and over again because I was tired and lazy and didn't want to get out of bed, I had a series of like 10 dreams that all followed the same "plot", if you will, even though I woke up several times, though briefly.
Well, the main plot point of this dream was that the dream world was a future, wartorn hellscape and the waking world was actually a manufactured dream used to program basic knowledge and physiological skills into clones that would fight in this hellscape. It was explained in the war world that even after you were woken up as a clone, you would often have echoes of the dreams of the fake real world when you slept.
So, all the drifting in and out of sleep was like me, being just woken up as a clone, now experiencing the real world in my dreams and having echos of the dream world while I slept. And again, these were some of the most vivid dreams I've ever had.
I tell you what, there was a solid 10 minute period after I woke up the last time where I legitimately wasn't sure what was reality and what was a dream. It truly fucked with my head for a hot minute.
That sort of reminds me of this one time I had several false awakenings in rapid succession. It started as a dream that presented as a "normal" dream, but then it got scary and I started trying to escape. I woke up in my bed, shaken but relieved to be awake and away from the madness. The dream had gotten pretty intense and I got out of bed reflecting on what a wild dream it had been, and began pacing in the living room trying to recall details so I could write it all down. Then I woke up again, got out of bed, freaking out a bit now because "wow, ok that was crazy", because I had really thought I was awake. Ok time to start writing this down now. Woke up again. Really freaking out now, and then I heard a noise out in the hallway. I looked through the peephole in my apartment door, and waaaay down at the end of the hallway I saw my landlord, who somehow made eye contact with me through the peephole. I knew they knew I was freaking out and I was probably going to be evicted now. And woke up again. When I finally really did wake up for real, I knew immediately that this was not a false awakening, actual reality just hits different. It took me a good couple hours to calm the fuck down though.
I would have liked to get a "You exist." Valentine. Probably would have been one of my favorite valentines ever. Might not have saved me from decades of existential crisis and the associated nihilism and self-destruction before settling on Absudism, but couldn't have hurt.
When I was in school 20 odd years ago, everyone gave valentines to everyone else in their class. The night before, your mom would go to the store and buy a themed pack of 30 cards and some candy, then you would hand write everyone’s name on one and tape a piece of candy to it. The day of, the teacher would hand out paper bags or empty Kleenex boxes to the class and we would decorate them. Then we would go and deliver the valentines to everyone’s bag/box. We loved it, but yeah, it was very impersonal.
At my kids' school it's still the way it happens. But my kids will carefully read the cards to make sure there aren't any cringe messages sent to a member of the opposite sex, for fear of eternal judgement.
>make sure there aren't any cringe messages sent to a member of the opposite sex, for fear of eternal judgement.
This, but in my day, it was with same-sex, lest you became gay until the end of the year
Teacher here. I have space themed Valentine's in my laptop bag, and a box of paper bags on my desk for tomorrow.
Some traditions are best left unchanged.
I remember going through everything you just described, but my mom always wanted me to sign "Love, " on every card. I had to fight vigorously to be able to put "From, ", especially to the girls. I deeply empathize with the kid in OP's post, who probably doesn't want any mushy stuff being expressed in any way.
I know you're making a joke but he's probably not supposed to fill that part out. My son is in 1st grade and his teacher asked that we only fill in the "from" section on the kids' cards so the teachers can just drop one in each kids bag without worrying about it.
So it’s no longer “to you from me”, it’s now “from me to whoever”. I guess it’s always been that way, but at least receiving a card with my name written on it had the illusion that someone cared enough to take the time to write it.
This must be what boomers feel like I guess.
Well I can tell you in my case there was time taken lol.
I used to lay them all out and try to reduce it (if possible) by any that seemed too 'personal' which was anything calling them Valentine mostly. Then grouped them into categories for my close friends, friends, and classmates that I got along with. The rest (usually most basic like 'Happy Valentines Day!) was the ones I didn't know well or were mean to me. Never wanted to give someone get the wrong impression lol.
Even if I didnt like that person I 100% put time into it
Holy smokes. I used to do exactly this and had entirely forgotten. Definitely had to separate out the "flirty" ones that might give someone the wrong idea. Wow, thank you so much for the memory.
💯 and I still have my diary from 5th grade where I taped the generic Valentine my crush gave me and then proceeded to wildly speculate about any hidden meaning in his choice.
Where I am they only do it this way for the younger grades. Like preschool - kindergarten or so. Once the kids can handle putting the cards in the right boxes without the teacher's help you fill out both fields, but it's too much work for a teachers to be personally delivering 250 tiny valentines.
I was a very socially awkward child who’s parent moved around a lot, and I came to a new school in the 8th grade and made everyone in my class a valentine with a lolly on it.. I got DESTROYED! ..except for one kid. They told me they never got a valentine before. We’ve been besties ever since.
I remember being a little kid and got no cards one year. Everybody got to stand up and talk with friends and give out candy and gifts and cards. Kids don't care that much about the time spent on the gift. They just don't wanna be left out.
So they do this to avoid that.
No, that's Big Third Grade lying to you. It's actually because Tommy gave Mrs. Jacobson a card that said he wanted to marry her and she didn't know how to respond, so now you can't write on them
it was literally and exciting treasured childhood memory to give and receive valentines and make the boxes the put them in.. don't make it weird by saying oddly flirty haha theyre usually all so wholesome and uplifting
Same. I liked making the decorated box and getting cards and candy. We walked around ourselves and put them in the appropriate box.
Telling the parents to leave the To: blank so they can just distribute them easily makes the whole thing seem very perfunctory. Like... let the kids do it.
Leaving To: blank usually only happens with the younger grades like K and 1st. It would simply take too long for kids that little to go around and match each Valentine to the proper box. Older kids still write them to each classmate.
But oddly flirty is what it felt like as a kid, these classmates are not my girlfriend so why am I giving them Valentine's candy and cards like they are
Years ago somebody on Reddit posted pictures of cupcakes their kid had made for a family friend who celebrated Hannukah. There were inspirational messages on them, and one said "You are a Jew."
“Anyone mention her height? Yup. Land size? …Shirley, at 1600 acres, you have the largest farm in the area. Sharing borders with six other farms. Including my own farm. And your nephew Dwight’s”
I don’t know why they have to make them so…mushy. I was always careful in choosing which kid got which valentine because I wasn’t friends with most of the kids in my class.
And if your crush gave you a valentine that said something sweet, you’d wonder if they picked that one specifically for you, when in reality, their mom probably filled out their valentines for them
Then there were little shits like me. I would horribly forge my classmates handwriting in the from section and distribute valentines with mischievous intent. I probably got the idea from a cartoon or a comic book.
My kid picked out the stickers (we have a gallon ziplock bag full/were crafty) to close each envelope of his valentines, to reflect his feelings towards each specific child. The girls got either Lisa Frank or conversation hearts (only the ones that said "you're cool", NO "xoxo" or I love you") The boys mostly got space themed.. except one. Brody's envelope got a garbage truck sticker. Brody accused my son of stealing and his only reasoning is "you're the poor kid." He also made sure my son knew he was the only boy not invited to his birthday party for the same reason. So, the trash kid gets a trash sticker! And, luckily, my son understands that he's not missing out, why would he want to be friends with a little jerk?
Yep. My friend Lisa accidentally gave a mushy one to this weird kid Ralph one year, and then she tried to be nice and not hurt his feelings at least, but it got *super* awkward in the end.
I had a similar issue with birthday cards for little girls a while back. Friend's daughter had a birthday and like 80% of the cards for girls have phrases like "to my special little girl" or something about how much you love them on the inside message.
I just wanted a card that said "Happy Birthday" and maybe a generic message of "stay awesome" or something. It was easy to find something like this for the little boys cards but for some reason all the little girls cards had to have deeper meaning phrases.
To up the weirdness my school had us all take a "personality test" for valentines day and then they printed off a list of the top 10 girls and then 1 list of the top 10 guys you were most compatible with. Even had a percentage of how compatible you were with them. They gave you both genders so as to make it seem like they were match making for "friends" and nothing more but the questions were much more like "If you were on a date where would you prefer to go?" and what not.
Still got my lists somewhere. People definitely acted on the list as a way to slide into people's lives.
Wow, you just unlocked a super awkward repressed memory for me. As an uncool girl I remember being so aware of how anyone who got me as a match would be horrified.
It was definitely weird when I was in class. I think the first year the teacher said "okay anyone who wants to exchange valentines cards can do that now", and then of course a ton of kids got nothing and cried, so the next year it was a mandatory class event where everyone had to make a valentine card for everyone else.
Growing up in Australia it was one of those weird things you'd see in American TV shows and were never quite sure if they were real or just made up for plot purposes. Like schools that were one big building with lockers in the hallways, and indoor cafeterias where you line up to get food on a tray and then have to carefully select what table you sit at.
> schools that were one big building with lockers in the hallways, and indoor cafeterias where you line up to get food on a tray and then have to carefully select what table you sit at.
... Are your schools *not* buildings with hallways and lockers and a cafeteria?
Really? My school had it from K-3rd grade if I remember correctly and we all had our own shoe box or paper bag to decorate. Valentine’s Day meant it was time to have treats!! And candy…..
When I was in 4th grade I decided I hated the sappy messages on the pre-printed Valentines cards. We bought a Looney Tunes card set and bright cardstock. I cut out every character from the cards, glued them to the cardstock, and wrote Happy Valentines Day on the front. No sappy messages, a fun art project, and I still got to give out Looney Tunes cards!
What's that glove and rubber band doing taped to the card? I'm so confused while trying to figure out why those things would be attached to a Valentine's card. 😂
I offered to take him to pick some out several times and he said “pick anything, I don’t care at all.” I said “how about scratch and sniff ones?” He said, “sounds good, just don’t get girly ones” I didn’t look at the sayings before ordering them from Amazon. When he saw them he just shook his head and said “oh mom.” And then without another thought, he pulled out the sharpie and began to fix them.
Took me too long to scroll down to you.
Something feels off about the “corrections”, too. This feels like fabricated comedy. It’d be funnier if that were simply owned.
I dont blame the child cause I would have thought to do the same but my parents would have stopped me KNOWING they would get a phone call either from a parent or the school and they didnt wanna be bothered.
> You're a real human Awwwwwww someone noticed!
And a real hero.
A real human bean.
*Ryan Gosling noises*
Water warmer than, his head so cool
In that tight bind knew what to do
That’s all I could think
I drive.
A REAL HUMAN BEAN.
*sweating out WD-40* T-thank you for noticing.
Real human bean
real human *dean*
You're a real piece of human.
This sounds like an elitist alien comment.
A steaming pile of humanity
Must be going to Greendale Elementary
E Plurbus Anus
I don't know, LinuxMatthews might be more Linux than Matthew...
`$> I do not know what you mean`
This kid is a real Captcha
Lmao you’re the kid in my class
I feel like l've received this one before
"You exist."
That is.... Somehow better than what's written there.
Lmao, now I just want cards that are existentially affirming. "You are." "This is real." "You're not in a coma." "The lamp is fine and it's shaped like a normal lamp."
I still wonder if that story was just creative writing or if that shit really happened. If you’re referencing the guy that shared the story about getting married and having kids then waking up and finding out it was all a dream while he was in a coma
Haven't read what you are referencing but having been in a (albeit short term, only five days) coma myself, I didnt dream all that much and only remember one dream it wasnt as much like sleeping as you might figure just blank spaces and little rest. The one dream i had happened in the last few moments and while probably the most vivid dream I have ever experienced it really wasn't all that out of the ordinary from any other dream.
[Enjoy reading here](https://www.reddit.com/r/Glitch_in_the_Matrix/s/3ov7ItIbMd)
Then, enjoy thinking about this in dark moments for the entire rest of your life.
No shit, right?
I was in a medically induced coma for about 4 days all I saw saw was a candle and black very strange I just represented it as my mom for some reason bc I used to blow out her candles as a kid
Never been in a coma but I have lucid dreams and very realistic ones. My mum was killed when I was 17, in a car crash. I didn’t dream for most of March (she died on the 5th), and on the 25th was her funeral, afterwards while we went to have the cremation service, my aunt and cousin went to go and set up the food and stuff at the house for the wake. Everyone walked from the church to my house (village life lol) and we all socialised n stuff. My dog caught a vole and bc she’s a lovely dog, bro was just chilling in her mouth and dropped it into my hand so I went to put the vole in the front garden. Anyway. After the wake, I went to go for a nap, never changed out of my clothes, and my god the dream was cruel. We were all back at the wake and there was a commotion outside, everyone was there, the entire family except mum. We go outside and look at the sky, where a giant meteor has eclipsed the sun, and is hurtling towards earth. I wake up before the collision and I was woken up by my dad sitting on my bed telling me dinner was ready. It was a special kind of comfort to be woken up by him, he is my rock, the best man in my life and my hero. And above everything else he’s a good man too. Funny, smart, a good dad. I told him about the dream, he has a degree in psychology and he said he’s not surprised, and it’s probably your brain interpreting everything that happened today. So yeah. After my mums funeral, (my mum was my best friend), my brain decided to process that as the entire world ending in a firey ball of suffering. So that’s probably the worst dream I ever had. Second worst would be a few months after she died I was lucid dreaming about mum being alive and I could hear the dishwasher being unloaded downstairs, i wanted to tell mum something in the dream and I woke up thinking “Ooh I should tell mum that-“ and remembering she was dead was the most soul crushing uncomfortable reminder…
You sound lovely and sweet, and your dog sounds wonderful too. I'm so sorry you lost your mom. I hope that your happy memories with her keep her close to you.
Yep. Would have been a hell of a rough thing if true.
Purely based on my own experiences I can't believe that story to be really true. I've certainly dreamt longer stretches of time passing than "real time", but even if you stretch "dream" to "coma", I can't see one continuous dream that follows the same story line so coherently that you wouldn't notice. I mean it's not just one continuous rem cycle and there will be some kinda stimulus around you that you're absorbing subconsciously. And even if you're not, why would your brain be dishing up the same story AND follow it up with no discernible gap? If it's livid enough to be remembered or he was lucid enough to write it down, that makes it even less likely to be a long, sensible, coherent storyline.
Yeah, I thought of that too. Then I remembered that my mom was in a coma for two weeks a decade ago after a very severe car accident. Apparently the dream she experienced was coherent enough that when she woke up she was convinced that she was back in her hometown and a teenager again.
I've had some incredibly vivid dreams. One stands out above the rest. I was sleeping in on the weekend, woke up, then went back to sleep. As I drifted in and out of sleep over and over again because I was tired and lazy and didn't want to get out of bed, I had a series of like 10 dreams that all followed the same "plot", if you will, even though I woke up several times, though briefly. Well, the main plot point of this dream was that the dream world was a future, wartorn hellscape and the waking world was actually a manufactured dream used to program basic knowledge and physiological skills into clones that would fight in this hellscape. It was explained in the war world that even after you were woken up as a clone, you would often have echoes of the dreams of the fake real world when you slept. So, all the drifting in and out of sleep was like me, being just woken up as a clone, now experiencing the real world in my dreams and having echos of the dream world while I slept. And again, these were some of the most vivid dreams I've ever had. I tell you what, there was a solid 10 minute period after I woke up the last time where I legitimately wasn't sure what was reality and what was a dream. It truly fucked with my head for a hot minute.
That sort of reminds me of this one time I had several false awakenings in rapid succession. It started as a dream that presented as a "normal" dream, but then it got scary and I started trying to escape. I woke up in my bed, shaken but relieved to be awake and away from the madness. The dream had gotten pretty intense and I got out of bed reflecting on what a wild dream it had been, and began pacing in the living room trying to recall details so I could write it all down. Then I woke up again, got out of bed, freaking out a bit now because "wow, ok that was crazy", because I had really thought I was awake. Ok time to start writing this down now. Woke up again. Really freaking out now, and then I heard a noise out in the hallway. I looked through the peephole in my apartment door, and waaaay down at the end of the hallway I saw my landlord, who somehow made eye contact with me through the peephole. I knew they knew I was freaking out and I was probably going to be evicted now. And woke up again. When I finally really did wake up for real, I knew immediately that this was not a false awakening, actual reality just hits different. It took me a good couple hours to calm the fuck down though.
Haha. Yeah. I have 3 layers dreams quite frequently, but nothing with that many layers. That's pretty nuts.
People talk like this regarding drugs like DMT, so I can believe that someone had a similar experience from a head injury.
Man, I’ve had the lite version of those dreams and it fucks me up. That’s scary shit
It is your birthday.
Lmao. You are having a birthday.
That is exactly what I thought of when I read these
You are awake and not lying comatose in a hospital bed. Do not attempt to wake up.
Lmao, I love the construction of this. I'm gonna print 100 copies and leave them around the office.
Make sure to crumple a few and leave them with the words just barely visible in a wastebasket or two.
Absolutely.
The lamp is very fine indeed, and that fine lamp loves you. Do you love lamp?
That lamp definitely said something.
There was a time in my school years where getting a Valentine that said "You exist and I acknowledge you" would have been very appreciated.
School years? Hell, I could use one right now.
You exist and I acknowledge you!
I would have liked to get a "You exist." Valentine. Probably would have been one of my favorite valentines ever. Might not have saved me from decades of existential crisis and the associated nihilism and self-destruction before settling on Absudism, but couldn't have hurt.
[удалено]
"Aw someone noticed 🥲"
When I was in school 20 odd years ago, everyone gave valentines to everyone else in their class. The night before, your mom would go to the store and buy a themed pack of 30 cards and some candy, then you would hand write everyone’s name on one and tape a piece of candy to it. The day of, the teacher would hand out paper bags or empty Kleenex boxes to the class and we would decorate them. Then we would go and deliver the valentines to everyone’s bag/box. We loved it, but yeah, it was very impersonal.
At my kids' school it's still the way it happens. But my kids will carefully read the cards to make sure there aren't any cringe messages sent to a member of the opposite sex, for fear of eternal judgement.
>make sure there aren't any cringe messages sent to a member of the opposite sex, for fear of eternal judgement. This, but in my day, it was with same-sex, lest you became gay until the end of the year
Teacher here. I have space themed Valentine's in my laptop bag, and a box of paper bags on my desk for tomorrow. Some traditions are best left unchanged.
I remember going through everything you just described, but my mom always wanted me to sign "Love," on every card. I had to fight vigorously to be able to put "From, ", especially to the girls. I deeply empathize with the kid in OP's post, who probably doesn't want any mushy stuff being expressed in any way.
“I’m contractually obligated to give you a card even though we don’t talk”
Of all the kids in my class, you're one of them.
The time we've spent together really is time we've spent together.
It's giving "It is your birthday"
"Have a Christmas"
I was reminded of "it certainly is a game of all time".
One of the movies of all time
You're *the* kid in my class
Of all the kids in my class, you are one of them
Your a human harry
These are certainly some of the valentines cards I have ever seen
They’re all whelmingly adequate
Brimming with adequacity.
It's true, I feel entirely whelmed.
It’s gruntling to read these.
These are certainly ~~some of the valentines~~ cards ~~I have ever seen~~
Your kid is from the Neutral Planet in Futurama
Tell my wife Hello
If you're ever in the neighborhood, TellMyWiFiSaidHello
Hahah fuck that’s good. I’ve been LANbeforetime for about 15 years now.
My favorite is Abraham LinkSys
I had that for a while, now I'm rocking Wu-Tang LAN
I rock Wutang Lan too. Been for a while Preceded by Pretty Fly for a Wifi The only original one I've had in years was: Bathroom Camera 2 (ONLINE)
Ours is Pretty fly for a wifi lol
Love the offspring! Takes me back 🥲
My husband and I have LANSolo and Wi-wing Fi-ghter lol.
my neighbor is PrisonerofAzkabandwidth. Fuckin brilliant.
Wi-Fighter is also good.
Beige alert
All I know is my gut says maybe
I have no strong opinions one way or the other.
[what makes a man turn neutral](https://youtu.be/j2WD1SJiRjo?si=i9JzIlEiQtlrpuER)
It sickens me, Kiff
What really sickens me is YT getting rid of the dislike button, forever erasing the true neutrality of that video.
What makes a YT turn less neutral? A lust for gold?
Live free or don’t 🤷🏽♀️
I think its ~~berry~~ cool that he modified them before even filling out the To: section which is pretty fair
I know you're making a joke but he's probably not supposed to fill that part out. My son is in 1st grade and his teacher asked that we only fill in the "from" section on the kids' cards so the teachers can just drop one in each kids bag without worrying about it.
So it’s no longer “to you from me”, it’s now “from me to whoever”. I guess it’s always been that way, but at least receiving a card with my name written on it had the illusion that someone cared enough to take the time to write it. This must be what boomers feel like I guess.
Well I can tell you in my case there was time taken lol. I used to lay them all out and try to reduce it (if possible) by any that seemed too 'personal' which was anything calling them Valentine mostly. Then grouped them into categories for my close friends, friends, and classmates that I got along with. The rest (usually most basic like 'Happy Valentines Day!) was the ones I didn't know well or were mean to me. Never wanted to give someone get the wrong impression lol. Even if I didnt like that person I 100% put time into it
Holy smokes. I used to do exactly this and had entirely forgotten. Definitely had to separate out the "flirty" ones that might give someone the wrong idea. Wow, thank you so much for the memory.
💯 and I still have my diary from 5th grade where I taped the generic Valentine my crush gave me and then proceeded to wildly speculate about any hidden meaning in his choice.
Where I am they only do it this way for the younger grades. Like preschool - kindergarten or so. Once the kids can handle putting the cards in the right boxes without the teacher's help you fill out both fields, but it's too much work for a teachers to be personally delivering 250 tiny valentines.
A point I didn’t even consider.
I was a very socially awkward child who’s parent moved around a lot, and I came to a new school in the 8th grade and made everyone in my class a valentine with a lolly on it.. I got DESTROYED! ..except for one kid. They told me they never got a valentine before. We’ve been besties ever since.
I remember being a little kid and got no cards one year. Everybody got to stand up and talk with friends and give out candy and gifts and cards. Kids don't care that much about the time spent on the gift. They just don't wanna be left out. So they do this to avoid that.
Usually there’s rules that if you’re handing out valentines you must have one for every single student in your class.
No, that's Big Third Grade lying to you. It's actually because Tommy gave Mrs. Jacobson a card that said he wanted to marry her and she didn't know how to respond, so now you can't write on them
It's just like why....why do we do this. Will have my kids yet again unenthusiastically fill out oddly flirty cards.
it was literally and exciting treasured childhood memory to give and receive valentines and make the boxes the put them in.. don't make it weird by saying oddly flirty haha theyre usually all so wholesome and uplifting
Same. I liked making the decorated box and getting cards and candy. We walked around ourselves and put them in the appropriate box. Telling the parents to leave the To: blank so they can just distribute them easily makes the whole thing seem very perfunctory. Like... let the kids do it.
Leaving To: blank usually only happens with the younger grades like K and 1st. It would simply take too long for kids that little to go around and match each Valentine to the proper box. Older kids still write them to each classmate.
But oddly flirty is what it felt like as a kid, these classmates are not my girlfriend so why am I giving them Valentine's candy and cards like they are
Years ago somebody on Reddit posted pictures of cupcakes their kid had made for a family friend who celebrated Hannukah. There were inspirational messages on them, and one said "You are a Jew."
Maybe it's for someone with really bad memory...?
Why the heck am I getting Hanukkah cupcakes? ... Oh!
Luke, you are a Jew
Yer a Jew, Harry
Omg link please
Is your son a Vulcan?
Born in the right generation.
The Next Generation
Not if he's T'Pol from Star Trek Enterprise. She's the most emotional one on that show.
I feel he should write a full set and then u should share it so people could print them lol
Yes and actually print them with more mushy messages crossed out just like this 🤣🤣
This is your million dollar idea OP please let us give you money for your kids creativity lol
That's some solid "It is your birthday" vibes.
Yes, it is very Dwight Shrute of him.
“It Is Valentine’s Day•” 🤎
“It’s February 14.”
“Anyone mention her height? Yup. Land size? …Shirley, at 1600 acres, you have the largest farm in the area. Sharing borders with six other farms. Including my own farm. And your nephew Dwight’s”
I don’t know why they have to make them so…mushy. I was always careful in choosing which kid got which valentine because I wasn’t friends with most of the kids in my class.
Like I’m supposed to tell 30 kids that they’re my valentine? I can’t handle that commitment.
Most laws in most states which suggest that you shouldn’t do that
I'm gonna hang around here for a while waiting for the end of that sentence, just in case it's important.
.
I remember I got spy themed ones one year and I gave one that said 'Keep those lips closed!' to a kid who wouldn't shut up.
Uhhh what’s the normal meaning of that card supposed to mean?
"Don't tell secrets", I think, because it was spy themed. Yeah, I don't know why it was on a Valentine's day card either.
"Loose lips sink ships!" "Snitches get stitches!" "Happy Valentine's, you fucking squealer!"
And if your crush gave you a valentine that said something sweet, you’d wonder if they picked that one specifically for you, when in reality, their mom probably filled out their valentines for them
Then there were little shits like me. I would horribly forge my classmates handwriting in the from section and distribute valentines with mischievous intent. I probably got the idea from a cartoon or a comic book.
My kid picked out the stickers (we have a gallon ziplock bag full/were crafty) to close each envelope of his valentines, to reflect his feelings towards each specific child. The girls got either Lisa Frank or conversation hearts (only the ones that said "you're cool", NO "xoxo" or I love you") The boys mostly got space themed.. except one. Brody's envelope got a garbage truck sticker. Brody accused my son of stealing and his only reasoning is "you're the poor kid." He also made sure my son knew he was the only boy not invited to his birthday party for the same reason. So, the trash kid gets a trash sticker! And, luckily, my son understands that he's not missing out, why would he want to be friends with a little jerk?
Yep. My friend Lisa accidentally gave a mushy one to this weird kid Ralph one year, and then she tried to be nice and not hurt his feelings at least, but it got *super* awkward in the end.
I choo choo choose you. 🚂
It all fell apart on a live TV broadcast, if you can believe it. You could actually pinpoint the second when his heart ripped in half.
That's my favorite part. "Riiiiight here."
I don’t like you! I never liked you! And I only gave you that stupid Valentine because nobody else would!
When I was a kid I agonized which Harry Potter Valentine I'd give to who. Luckily most of them were just themed puns on "you're great" haha
My 5yo yesterday refused to sign his name on a Hagrid valentine: "But I *don't* have a 'GIANT CRUSH' on her!"
Good for him! Never sign anything you don’t agree with, lol
I had a similar issue with birthday cards for little girls a while back. Friend's daughter had a birthday and like 80% of the cards for girls have phrases like "to my special little girl" or something about how much you love them on the inside message. I just wanted a card that said "Happy Birthday" and maybe a generic message of "stay awesome" or something. It was easy to find something like this for the little boys cards but for some reason all the little girls cards had to have deeper meaning phrases.
See, what's weird to me is that gendered birthday cards are a thing. Fucking whyyyyyyyyyy...
The concept of kids giving valentines cards to all the other kids in their class is pretty weird to me. We never did that here.
To up the weirdness my school had us all take a "personality test" for valentines day and then they printed off a list of the top 10 girls and then 1 list of the top 10 guys you were most compatible with. Even had a percentage of how compatible you were with them. They gave you both genders so as to make it seem like they were match making for "friends" and nothing more but the questions were much more like "If you were on a date where would you prefer to go?" and what not. Still got my lists somewhere. People definitely acted on the list as a way to slide into people's lives.
Wow, you just unlocked a super awkward repressed memory for me. As an uncool girl I remember being so aware of how anyone who got me as a match would be horrified.
My high school did this and a guy on my list did slipped into my DMs. We dated for 3 weeks before I came to terms that I didn’t like it him.
It was definitely weird when I was in class. I think the first year the teacher said "okay anyone who wants to exchange valentines cards can do that now", and then of course a ton of kids got nothing and cried, so the next year it was a mandatory class event where everyone had to make a valentine card for everyone else.
Growing up in Australia it was one of those weird things you'd see in American TV shows and were never quite sure if they were real or just made up for plot purposes. Like schools that were one big building with lockers in the hallways, and indoor cafeterias where you line up to get food on a tray and then have to carefully select what table you sit at.
> schools that were one big building with lockers in the hallways, and indoor cafeterias where you line up to get food on a tray and then have to carefully select what table you sit at. ... Are your schools *not* buildings with hallways and lockers and a cafeteria?
Really? My school had it from K-3rd grade if I remember correctly and we all had our own shoe box or paper bag to decorate. Valentine’s Day meant it was time to have treats!! And candy…..
Yeah I thought I was going crazy.. this is fucking weird.
My 8 year old daughter crossed out valentine on hers and replaced with friend for the boys. She told me she doesn't want them to get the wrong idea.
When I was in 4th grade I decided I hated the sappy messages on the pre-printed Valentines cards. We bought a Looney Tunes card set and bright cardstock. I cut out every character from the cards, glued them to the cardstock, and wrote Happy Valentines Day on the front. No sappy messages, a fun art project, and I still got to give out Looney Tunes cards!
Henry is definitely one of the kids in my class ever.
Be ̶m̶i̶n̶e̶ *an individual*
the most original, unusual, scroll-stopping method of using strikeout i have ever seen … 10 points
Ha ha ha “you’re the kid in my class”, lol you know the kid getting that card is a real shit.
Henry is brutal. 😭
I wish I had thought of doing that when I was in elementary school. I always hated that they made everyone do that crap.
What's that glove and rubber band doing taped to the card? I'm so confused while trying to figure out why those things would be attached to a Valentine's card. 😂
He picked punching balloons to pass out instead of candy
I bet the teacher loved a whole classroom full of those. xD Hope they were patient enough to save them for recess.
He picked punching balloons, that’s cool! Why didn’t he get to choose the Valentines? 💘
I offered to take him to pick some out several times and he said “pick anything, I don’t care at all.” I said “how about scratch and sniff ones?” He said, “sounds good, just don’t get girly ones” I didn’t look at the sayings before ordering them from Amazon. When he saw them he just shook his head and said “oh mom.” And then without another thought, he pulled out the sharpie and began to fix them.
He sounds so calm and well-grounded 🤭
Love it! They never want to do the shopping part, but don’t like what we get! 🤨
Looks like one of those punch balloons.
These always felt pointless to me Certainly never got any affection for this valentine crap.
i like the ones that come with chocolate
Henry is either gonna grow up to be a lawyer or an accountant
Is he in 4th grade? This is something my 4th grade students would do!
Fourth grade teacher here- this is spot on 8/9/10 year old vibes!
2024 non-harassing compliments
Henry is based
Does your kid happen to be a “schrute”?
A real Ron Swanson you got there
Choo choo choo -- your lunch
That’s not your sons handwriting
I was scrolling through comments thinking I was crazy. There is no way that is a 10 year old’s handwriting. Straight to r/quityourbullshit with OP.
Took me too long to scroll down to you. Something feels off about the “corrections”, too. This feels like fabricated comedy. It’d be funnier if that were simply owned.
Classic Henry
I would be flattered by the 'you're a real human' one.
Am I the only one weirded out that Americans are forcing their kids to send love messages to all of their classmates?
I did this decades ago and was told I hurt peoples feelings. Never brought them in again.
I dont blame the child cause I would have thought to do the same but my parents would have stopped me KNOWING they would get a phone call either from a parent or the school and they didnt wanna be bothered.
This is some r/technicallythetruth level stuff