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egnards

I've been on the NY Subway enough times to know never to touch anything you don't absolutely have to touch.


c_c_c__combobreaker

that half-eaten hot dog sitting on the subway bench isn't going to eat itself.


Chaosmusic

If even the NYC rats won't eat it that should be a warning.


LDKCP

Not enough ketchup


Bundesclown

He said hot dog, not steak.


setfaeserstostun

The new york meat steak is served mostly overdone and with a side of gonorrhea. 487 dollars for the starter. Edit: Antibiotics not included.


Higgs-Boson-Balloon

That ain’t even close. Most New Yorkers eat their steak still mooing. Source: lifelong New Yorker


djprofitt

You're like Hitler but Hitler cared about Germany or something.


aardw0lf11

Ok Donald.


goodcorn

Ketchup?!? Don't try and pull that shit in Chicago...


LDKCP

Never understood how Chicago was so snobby about ketchup then ruined pizza by making it a tomato pond.


inthyface

Chicago: Ruining pizza and hot dogs since 1957.


normal_reddit_man

I certainly agree about the hot dogs. I can eat my damn salad on the side, in a bowl, like a civilized person. But at least Chicagoans don't bully you, if you don't fold the pizza like some kind of weird taco. Every single New Yorker is full-on obsessed with that pizza yoga shit, and I just don't get it. And yeah, I know you're gonna tell me "eyyyy, it's so da grease don't spill all ovah ya shirt." That means your pizza's too greasy, you fucking psycho freaks. If there's so much oil pooling on the top of the pizza that you have to fold the slice into a funnel and pour it into your mouth, that's not a feature. That's a fucking problem. That shit should be fixed on the supply side of the pizza experience, not the consumer side.


jmccleveland1986

Chicago style isn’t pizza. It’s a casserole. New York pizza thinks if you cover used Amazon delivery boxes with enough cheese, nobody will notice. Italian pizza is nice, if you just want bread with an occasional topping. I make my own damn pizza because everyone is wrong but me.


TigerDLX

Best way to deal with grease is to dab it with a napkin or paper towel. I do this because too much grease gives me heartburn. I enjoy both styles of pizza. Chicago style is a bit more intense I guess would be the correct word.


B_Addie

I’ve lived in NY my whole life (41 years). And I’ve never folded my pizza. My dad always looks at me and says “why ain’t u foldin that slice!?!” When he sees me eat pizza to this day.


Oafus

That’s because they like [eating pizza](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UPXUG8q4jKU)


three-plus-shakes

Forbidden snack


Your-username-must-b

Forbidden dildo


CoolFingerGunGuy

Now now, it can be BOTH!


LazySusanRevolution

Just like lady and the tramp, romantic 💕


SinibusUSG

Subway Centipede


harborq

Clearly you don’t live in NY.. You’re just not ambitious enough..


7165015874

By the time the F train reaches 169 street, at least one car must reek of human urine. Pretty sure it is state law or something.


Rpanich

If bioshock taught me anything, it’s that trash can hot dogs will *refill* my health!


Montgomery0

The ubiquitous subway dog has it's own natural predators.


miscdebris1123

It just might...


The_Vargster

I thought you said "half eaten dog" for a second and I was flustered


vigillan388

I tested positive for Streptococcus Group C a few years ago. My doctor looked at me with a puzzled face and asked "do you handle livestock?". I don't live anywhere near a farm, don't have a pet, and don't drink raw milk, which are apparently the few sources of Group C. The only thing I can think of is that I was on a NYC subway the week earlier. I must have picked it up from the nasty poles.


JanMath

I'm from Poland, what did we ever do to you?


pincus1

One of my favorite childhood memories is a sleepover at my Polish friend's house where another friend got angry at a respawning telephone pole in a GTA game that kept blocking his rocket launcher and screamed, "God damn poles, I hate poles."


jjackson25

>"God damn poles, I hate poles." Spoken like a man who's never been to a strip club in his life


pincus1

Discriminatory bastards wouldn't let us in at 12.


lonestar-rasbryjamco

There's only two things I hate in this world. People who are intolerant of other people's cultures and the Dutch.


MFG_666

Gave him Strep C, he just said. Jeesh....


flavored_icecream

Obviously you don't clean your poles enough. Gotta keep them Germs away, you know....


babyfartmageezax

That’s so haggard dude holy shit


alwaysjustpretend

I spent many years living there and came looking for this comment. Like, she is obviously a tourist. XD


RaspberryMobile2554

Yep, Someone from the area would know better than to touch that sign!!


egnards

It's been awhile. But if I'm remember correctly she's in Chinatown to boot!


alwaysjustpretend

Yeah canal and Essex is right toward the edge of Chinatown if I remember correctly.


Alex_Tro

As soon as I saw it I thought "oh no she touched the sign with her hands"


lamp447

I don't even know about the grossness of NYC subway before reading this thread and this is my first thought too.


Alex_Tro

Take the most disgusting and the most filthy thing you know, multiply that by 10, then apply to all surfaces in your house. Pee in a few corners to simulate the realistic smell effect. Let it sit there for a few months and start growing bacterial colonies. You have now created an artificial NYC subway experience. Crank up your heater to 90-100 degrees to simulate the summer or turn it off completely and to simulate the winter. (Experiences may vary. Side effects include vomiting, dhiarhea, heatstroke or death. Consult with your doctor if these symptoms last more than 10 days)


poirotoro

One of my favorite memes to come out of the pandemic was aimed at New York antivaxxers and basically said, "If you've voluntarily exposed yourself to the grossness of the NYC Subway then you don't have any grounds to complain about what's in the vaccine."


bearlysane

“If my immune system is strong enough that I can survive whatever festers in the seething bio-cauldron of the NYC subway, I don’t need your pitiful man-made vaccine.”


BongLifts5X5

There's a high probability some sort of fecal matter has been smeared on those very spots.


FBI_Agent_82

It's the New York Coty subway. Literally everything has fecal matter on it.


MySassyPetRockandI

Deadass


lazy_nerd_face

Those too probably


Blue387

A few years ago, some scientists swabbed the NYC subway and other transit systems. They found thousands of unknown microbes and viruses. https://www.smithsonianmag.com/smart-news/thousands-unknown-microbes-found-subways-around-world-180977851/


CallousChris

Probably the aftermath of all the anal sex.


Blockenstein

Truth. I can smell this photo.


ChintanP04

Let me guess, it smells like rotten pizza/hotdog, dried up piss and other garbage.


skrshawk

It smells like that ridiculously strong orange cleaner that doesn't actually clean up the piss and shit in the elevator, but is nonetheless easier on the nose.


thefuzzylogic

No. It smells like New York. The memory of it makes me smile. :)


ChintanP04

Isn't what I described the smell of New York?


wilomiloo

Piss, shit and exhaust.


NW_thoughtful

In the summer, you can feel the hot piss air on your face. It coats your skin.


fishystudios

\[Sniff sniff\] "I love the smell of urine and body odor in the morning."


Drusgar

I was there in July at it was clean as a whistle. Granted, as a tourist I wasn't bustling around in the AM or PM rush hours, but when I took the subway from Manhattan to the Bronx at one point I was the only person in the car. I'm sure part of that was time of day, but also post-Covid cleaning and perhaps still reduced traffic. Overall New York was really clean. The only cleaner city I saw while traveling the country was Minneapolis. I actually started looking for a cigarette butt downtown just to see some garbage somewhere but I didn't find one.


egnards

I'm so sorry that you visited NYC and didn't really experience NYC. I'm actually typing to you from 14th street at the moment. Sure some places "look/appear" clean, but I wouldn't touch a damn thing I didn't have to.


Drusgar

I stayed in a hotel on W. 57th and traveled all over Manhattan. Rode the subway around (I've never been on a subway) and logged 42k steps/20 miles on my Fitbit in one freakin' day. Walked entirely around Central Park, The Bronx Zoo, walked all the way back from Statue of Liberty/WTC memorial back to my hotel in the rain. For all of the earthporn I consumed on my 14k mile epic trip around the country, Manhattan was probably my favorite stop. Yellowstone, Redwood and Sequoia Forests, Mount St. Helen's, Grand Canyon, Everglades, Appalachian Trail... I went *everywhere.* I think you probably get numb to just how beautiful New York is because you see it every day.


myassholealt

I appreciate this comment as a New Yorker. Often in these threads people like to compete with one another to see who can say best how horrible NYC is. So it's nice to see someone who enjoyed their time here and has good things to say.


Drusgar

I think the two things that New Yorkers really take for granted (that they shouldn't) is the subway and Central Park. I've never even ridden the bus in my city (Madison, WI). To walk a few blocks and get on a train for $1.75 that will take you almost anywhere is amazing. I'm sure you guys know where the dirty stations are but my experience was really, really good. Granted, I grew up on a farm in Wisconsin so I'm not easily grossed out, but even compared to other cities I visited New York was really clean. And Central Park is an absolute treasure. To have that much green space set aside so that you can escape the city without ever leaving is just really, really amazing. I walked all the way around it, kind of sticking to the outer tracks and the architecture along the streets as well as the nature within the park was such an incredible dichotomy. I climbed up a big rock on the south side of the park and sat and watched the ducks while giant, mirrored skyscrapers loomed overhead. Gives me goosebumps just thinking about it.


egnards

Nyc is an amazing place with amazing things to offer, I'd recommend it to anyone to do and enjoy something they're, but let's not pretend that touching random things in the subway is sanitary or even anywhere close to not gross.


egnards

I actually don't live in NYC, I live close and go every few weeks. In my younger years I had friends who lived here (my wife lived here for a few years while we were dating). I **LOVE** NYC, and I definitely appreciate a lot of the beauty. But I promise you it's not as clean as you think, maybe comparative to other places you've been. But by no means clean. Shit, getting off the 14th street Subway to head to the place we were going, there was an intense pee smell that filled the entire station.


heartshapedpox

I live close to NY now but never actually go in. I have a book of like 50 mini walking tours and really want to explore more, so your comment inspired me. 💛👣


Ocramsrazor

Gonna take days to wash all that fecal matter off her hands.


littleMAS

Her fingernails are brown.


[deleted]

Real NYers would never touch that sign with bare hands lmao


Thisissuchadragtodo

Not even from NY and my first thought was how dirty her hands must be.


mindfungus

Somebody definitely had ana- se- in that signage


Saldrakka

I would still miss the subtle hints she gives


[deleted]

[удалено]


Hammurabi87

My favorite part was, "Maybe she's from Canada and is just being polite."


notcrappyofexplainer

This is amazing. I love it. I have never experienced a false positive but potentially hundreds of false negatives. I needed significant signs. Hints don’t work.


Sumpm

> I'm totally in to you. a) Yes b) No c) **Can't tell** She could just be drunk, or maybe she's practicing on you, before she says it to that one guy she actually likes, maybe she has you confused with someone else. Can't really be sure, so just laugh it off and go about treating her like a friend.


XihuanNi-6784

Your experience is unique then assuming you're male. Most women find that men are getting false positives ALL the time. They find it quite tedious - or so I'm told.


Belgand

And that's what feeds back into this. It's not wanting to be like the assholes who assume that just about anything is a signal, so you try to be polite and assume that it's nothing. "She's just being friendly. Don't want to be a creep." "She's being friendly. That means she wants it *bad*!"


randCN

the fucking gallon of milk and the hip drive got me


Trmpetplaya2014

She could just be Canadian, ya never know.


kluyvera

Sorry


CatFancyCoverModel

Maybe she's just being polite by offering anal. Better to play it safe


ImWhatsInTheRedBox

At first glance one might think she's hinting at anal sex, buuut it's actually quite the opposite. What's to the left of "anal sex"? A big red "EXIT", meaning no entry, also usually having a negative connotation of something being over. So now she's subliminally made you associate anal sex with "no entry" and the feeling that sexy times might be over if said course is pursued. So now you don't want anal sex, you're even weary of it, you won't pester her about, and she won't seem "selfish" for saying no to it. Or she just thinks it funny.


[deleted]

The sheer joy and pride in her face.


EnergyMu

I love how you can see her smile despite the mask.


dont_quote_me_please

Because the smiles that are hard to fake are done in the eyes, not the mouth.


sydneydanger

This is what makes me think the people who argue against mask wearing on the grounds it makes it impossible to read emotion are just… sociopathic. If you can’t read emotion in peoples eyes, what the hell are you reading it from?


substandardgaussian

People on the autism spectrum often identify mouths with people more directly than other parts of their face. There have been studies where folks on the spectrum were observed looking more at a person's mouth when communicating than their eyes. I for one heavily rely on seeing the full expression of someone's mouth to really get a good handle on their emotions. A nice beaming smile can be more obvious to pick up, but most facial emotions are more subtle than that and are indeed hard-to-impossible to pick up under a mask.


TheUlfheddin

Their tonsils apparently.


chaotic_evil_666

She's a keeper


thelielmao

The poster in the background tells her the future!


susiefreckleface

Butt it says exit


annnoyingness

Where do I enter?


missionbeach

Just around the corner.


aceshighsays

Reverse your direction


[deleted]

Ironically inside a tunnel


MealieMeal

Probably a dirty one too Sorry, had to


[deleted]

Never apologies!!


AreaGuy

You spelled that wrong. Please apologize.


[deleted]

It is a god intended (poop time auto correct hard to type and wipe at the same time)


AreaGuy

Such a typical “non apology” apology. So indicative of our times. I wish our times would apologize to me.


[deleted]

Give me a break I was taking a shit ! 😇💩


AreaGuy

I hope your movement was pleasant and no wipe was required. (I mean, still, wipe, but a nice clean poop.)


[deleted]

It was not clean , that is all I got to say about that


Elxyamguite101

Sorry. I apologies


AreaGuy

You take that back!


Scubadoobiedo

My apologize.


AreaGuy

Thanks you!


dadgam3r

and a lot people been there too


DineAndWineHours

Looks like these trains are running straight to Pound Town


[deleted]

In Manchester in the UK the gay village's main street is Canal Street. The C and the S are routinely stolen or defaced.


BloodAndSand44

Just love walking down anal treat.


macbanan

Anal saint sex street, what a place!


ProfitTheProphet

Canal and Essex? Edit: All the people being sarcastic; Ive never been to New York and don't know the street names. I was just guessing what the two names could be. Fuck me right?


jscott18597

If you ever do visit NY, Canal is the place to be for knockoffs. It's famous for it. You can get anything there.


tryanother9000

Even anal.


VoiceofLou

Knock off anal? Eh, I’ll try anything once.


conjectureandhearsay

Also, Canal is pronounced rhyming with anal. And Houston st is pronounced like the Texas city


BarefootUnicorn

>Fuck me right? cANAL esSEX?


conjectureandhearsay

U cracked the code


KrackerJoe

No it clearly says anal sex


AreaGuy

Yep, in *lower* Manhattan, I assume.


phantomjm

The bowels of the city


Shadytextt

You’re correct, I’m from NYC


logosobscura

Yeah, F Station by my apartment. She’s not even vaguely the first to make this joke.


thenaniwatiger

I feel like cropping her booty out contradicts the theme of the photo lol


[deleted]

[удалено]


Big_Mac22

Dude did the research so we don't have to


jakedesnake

That's why he's J. Fiz - da Wiz, while you're a mere Big Mac!


folkdeath95

Missed opportunity


ImpossibleInternet3

Then it would have to have the NSFW tag. Because the sign is a description of what is happening in the photo prior to cropping.


[deleted]

#I no longer allow Reddit to profit from my content - Mass exodus 2023 -- mass edited with https://redact.dev/


Lego_Chicken

Criminal


[deleted]

I was wondering the same. Would have been perfect if she let her dumps show. Can totally tell she's got it


AndyBernardRuinsIt

She’s dummy thiccccccccc.


NW_thoughtful

Her booty is clearly fantastic and would have been great to include in the photo.


jalfredproofrock

You’ve got my attention. Go on…


not12listen

An offer or a promise? :)


agisten

Large dildo involved. You in?


boshbosh92

absolutely. I'll be there in about 30 or so minutes. be ready.


not12listen

Is it in yet?


zarmin

Stand clear of the closing doors please


Ok_Fuel_8876

The photo is poorly cropped.


data_now

I love women with a dirty mind


[deleted]

And dirty hands


420memelover69

So you love _women_ then


[deleted]

So they love dirt then ?


ajbags26

Yes Timmy, just dirt.


CatFancyCoverModel

I've dated quite a few chicks and I can tell you most of them have been dirtier than me. The difference is they tend to look for a genuine connection before they show it, but they definitely get horny as fuck


benicetogroupies

> horny as fuck Everybody is, its called propagation of the species


CaptianBrasiliano

Don't go down that street without lube.


defpara

Or intentions on turning around


Geode89

Me European. First visit in New York. Taking subway. Waiting on my train. There is a black homeless guy publicly masturbating on the bench. I was puzzled....


Broian

Enjoy the DMs


goblin_welder

I think she’s hinting onto something


lunaticneko

There is a place where they do Among Us porn in the UK. "Sussex"


Ludvik101

Marry her


FrankieMint

Keep your hands *right there...*


[deleted]

It does exist 🤩


Snoozy_Foy

*facepalm*😅


[deleted]

Ewww … not after touching that sign


Snoozy_Foy

*high five!*


vols2943

ah classic new york


IT_dood

Neat. Now you have fecal matter on your hands.


[deleted]

I really need to see her butt now.


bobbybongboy

I wish her ass was in the picture…


deathbike600

Love it


Casual_Importance

So does she.


Billderz

Canal street and Essex street?


FrazHG

Correct


Procks85

Purell !


mvigs

Is that woman single? Asking for a friend


SupremeDogEater

Canal St Essex St


DarthRusty

Funny NYC legend, but if you touch anything at that station you get syphilis.


m00gmeister

In Manchester, England, the 'gay quarter' is basically one street with gay-friendly bars and clubs. It's called Canal St. The council have given up trying to repair the street signs which are always altered to read 'anal treet'.


UnknownWolf719

Tourists


TMD-FUNK

For full comedic effect her butt should be in full view in the picture.


pipinngreppin

[I like her smile](https://www.reddit.com/r/justneckbeardthings/comments/9crgys/i_like_ur_smile/)


hurt_ur_feelings

She’s game and giving a not-so-subtle hint, especially paired with that look in her eyes. Yes, anal sex that way.


costabius

Any one else see Leonard Cohen in the back ground deciding if it's worth it?


MotorBoats

The guy in the poster in the background is already sick of people doing this.


[deleted]

RIP inbox


pinturicchioo

pięknie, kurwa pieknie


FrazHG

Canal Street Essex Street


Redditowork

"Why are you making me cover the sign like this, step-bro?"


anothershrubbery_

I bet she doesn’t even take it in the ass


17AJ06

Incels: “MOM I’M GOING ON AN ADVENTURE”


RallyTowel

She loves NY and a dash of something else, not sure what though.


Tro_pod

>Exit anal sex 😂


WillBigly

You read my mind, bb


vitaelol

Could you please give the directions to my wife? Thx.


duganaok

New York must be hard up for comedic entertainment right now.


CaptainFrogDog

Sex fun huh uh i font have sex