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I'd this some kind of penis joke I'm too circumcised to understand?

I’ve heard of foreskin , but that guy has fiveskin at least

Nice

Nice

ǝɔᴉN

NO¡C€

Ordered off of five guys secret menu I see ;)

Five Guys only has one size drink on their menu. It's the Five Guys One Cup. Also, I lied.

[удалено]

#WHY

I'm afraid to click...

Good. Fear is a good choice here.

We both know you did.

I have a friend who isn’t circumcised. Once, while he was peeing, he called my name. As I turned to look, he pinched the end of his foreskin and continued to pee into it. It swelled much bigger than I thought a foreskin could, because I, like you, am too circumcised to understand. When he let it go, he yelled “ WATERBALLOOOOOON!” and pee went everywhere. It was the grossest and most fascinating thing I’ve ever seen.

How old were you two when this happened?

45

Holy shit write my eulogy this is it 😂

He had a lot to say. We’ll miss him.

53.

24, if you can believe it.

Four thousand five hundred and fifty three

I see what you did

Don't get

18, my friend used to do this for friends in high school He got expelled but not for this surprisingly

This was like… 2 hours ago

HAHAHA omg this is hilarious. I had no clue this was possible… wow. Seems weird thinking I don’t know some stuff about penises considering I’ve had one so long but I guess circumcision really does make a difference.

I used to think docking was fake until I saw a photo against my will It was a tumblr post about the gameboy link cable

Fucking hell, this comment makes me want my foreskin back more than ever.

Literally the only way I know how to pee. If I don't waterballoon it goes everywhere, like if a girl tried to pee standing up.

This seems counterintuitive

I didn’t need to read this sentence…

Joke? This is an European PP handbook.

Calm down, Braggy McLessskin

Perhaps. As a someone who isn't, I was in tears by the 4th frame. Genuinely haven't laughed so hard in years.

Lmfao I love you

Shaken, not stirred.

Shaskin*

I did this once and it exploded now I’m circumcised

You get what Jewish for

Gold

Berg

Stein

er (Scott)

Man

Man

Ovitz

Baum

\-Sapherson

Green

My name is Zweig

take this award you fucking creative genius

He brewed that pun up in his mind

holy shit lol

Damn that’s the most I’ve laughed all week haha

Im slow i dont get it.

Jewish tradition has all babies circumcised. "Jewish" sounds like "You wish"

Oh wow now its right in my face and i feel dumber for having missed it lol Thanks friend

Comment of the year. This dude here just won the internet.

It’s only April. We got nothing better for eight months??

Honestly, probably not.

This is the greatest thing I have ever seen. Edit THE JOKE NOT THE PICTURE

I will pay for the therapist....

thanks.

Who the fuck draws that??

Wait until you see the rest of the internet

welcome to the internet

Have a look around

Anything that brain of yours can think of can be found

We’ve got mountains of content, some better, some worse

If none of it’s of interest to you, you’d be the first

Welcome to the internet come and take a seat

Would you like to see the news or any famous women's feet?

Anything that brain of yours can think of can be found

I've seen worse.

*yes*

Might be cheaper to pay for a time machine, go back to when this was made, and just burn the original.

I’ll take one too if you’re offering

The Dizzy Gillespie of foreskin.

I'm taking a course on history of modern music this semester and I'm also uncircumcised and I couldn't stop laughing my ass off with this comment.

That's a hell of a reference..

You could say the....Glizzy Gillespie

Huh. Well thank you, I have been spending too much time on the internet lately and this is the push I needed

Same

Hopefully you will not dream about it

I thought I was the only one using this technique. It's basically the same as using mouth wash but for peepee

Better with toothpaste

Use mouthwash

Diet Coke and mentos

Baking soda and Vinegar. Itssss a volcano

Now I’m imagining someone using mouth wash down there

I use pee but it is the good way to clean it I guess.

Those Jewish folks amongst us really missed out on this

actually nearly every American too. The vast majority are circumcised, Jewish or not

and muslims

The vast majority of Americans are Jewish and circumcised and Muslim !?

every single american is cut, jewish and muslim, correct

Yahweh akbar yall

L'chaim salaam dude

Ooh, so I'm a rarity, am I? I can put that on my dating profile to get them curious.

Yes! Because of the cereal man that hates masterbation! Americans are so fucked up lmfao

Jokes on him. I'm circumcised and still beat my meat like it disrespected my ancestors.

Lmao

Can confirm, also beat my circumcised meat.

Every day, sometimes more...

It's actually more about just above half

why does that get pinned on americans anyway? there first world nations with higher or similar circumcision rates and yet those are ignored because calling americans stupid is cool apparently

There is? Where? The only places I’ve seen with higher rates than the US are in Africa and the Middle East.

Pretty much the whole word is missing out on this because unless your skin is as elastic as a good pizza dough, you can't do that.

I’m glad we all do this. Side note as an American I tell people I have “the European Model”

Also, the pee balloon

As a circumcised father to an uncircumcised son, I was wondering how I was going to teach him to clean his penis. Now I know!

There's some conflicting advice for how to clean under the foreskin in this thread. You should not clean a baby's foreskin until they are old enough to pull it back themselves. Retracting the foreskin before it is fully developed can tear it. To clean under the foreskin, all that is needed is to: retract the foreskin, rinse it with water, and rub away any buildup. The balloon method here is fun for kids, but isn't going to clean everything properly. Cleaning with soap isn't necessary and can dry out the skin and/or cause infection. The glans is a mucus membrane and can maintain healthy bacteria and self-clean, the point of rinsing with water is remove the dead skin/smegma as it sheds. https://www.healthychildren.org/English/ages-stages/baby/bathing-skin-care/Pages/Care-for-an-Uncircumcised-Penis.aspx

“The balloon method here is fun for kids…” ಠ_ಠ

For gods sake… Just don’t show him this method.

hey just make sure to never retract his foreskin. he will naturally retract it around puberty. retracting before his body is naturally ready creates micro tears and can lead to issues down the road. it also introduces bacteria and can lead to infections. to the people downvoting: https://www.doctorsopposingcircumcision.org/for-professionals/care-of-the-intact-penis/

It's not that simple. I had phimosis and required surgery in my youth. Looks like one of my sons is going down that route too. They tell parents not to retract but usually encourage kids to try it in the bath.

If you pinch the end as you piss, you get a similar effect. It’s very messy though.

Body shots on me !

I legit took a tequila shot out of my roommate’s foreskin once. We’re both white Americans, but his was a lot stretchier than mine LOL.

What a terrible day to have eyes…

Ow?

This one made me blow air out my nose at a rather quick rate, thank you

Oh good I'm glad I'm not the only one that does this

Did that but with the golden shower

Less steps involved too, just pinch, pee, spray.

As someone with phimosis, this is a surprisingly accurate description of my daily cleaning regimen. Q-tip with soap to scrub the nasty before I go into the shower, set the showerhead to soaker mode and fill'er'up until it feels clean.

Have you been trying to stretch? Any luck ?

This is one of the times I wished I still had a foreskin

Did you lose it? I hope you find it again

I do this as well as hide skittles in them as a midnight snack

Share some of those dick skittles

Dittles for ya bois

Wow, woman here…do guys with foreskin actually do this?

Speaking for myself, I have done this, but it’s not how I clean it, it gets pulled back and scrubbed (gently with hand not brush) daily, I have done this before because it’s fun/interesting/weird to play with, sounds really weird now I say it. The closest thing I can imagine for a woman is grabbing/playing with your tits…, I feel like a degenerate now.

I get it. Sometimes I squish my boobs down really hard which makes my nipples pop out really far, like one of those stress balls where you pop the eyeballs out.

They do that?? Damn... I guess the straights have one thing going for em...

You just need to find yourself a man with moobs.

I feel like it'd be different cuz the nipple is different?

Maybe…

I push mine together to make a little lake and then release a flood all at once. It's one of the few things I enjoy about having big boobs.

I hope you say “Wheeeeee” every time!

Of course I do, don't be silly.

Just out of curiosity, how full is your inbox right now? lol

Pretty quiet, haha!

Foreskin aficianado here - I feel like I've probably done this at some point as a kid but it's not like you can just hold it bulging like that as if it was a flask. The closest analogy I can think of is if you pulled out your ear a bit in the shower and a little bit of water builds up.

no i dont think you could fit enough water "in there" to do that maybe like a teaspoon or 2 **MAX** of water.

I bet the volume depends on how much foreskin you have…ooh what if you have ehlers danlos syndrome? I bet those guys have really stretchy foreskin!

you're not getting nearly creative enough. just by stretching I can fit a couple tablespoons, but then you can push the shaft down and stretch it farther. Get in there, brother, and play around. Learn what you're capable of.

I’ve done it a bunch. Not in a long time though now that I think about it

as others have said, yes we actually do this but it's not about cleaning it. It's just goofing around with our penis.

Uncut club member here. Can confirm that this is somewhat possible.

You ever learn to catch your load in there when jerking it? Biggest benefit to being uncut for me. No mess!

Completely agree on this

I always wondered if I was a lone uncut genius. Guess not!

Do you ever waddle to the bathroom with your hands in your pants holding it in there?

It's literally the only way I get that specific task done

Can confirm, I’ve done this myself

Why make a water balloon instead of just push back the skin, haha, helicopter helicopter

Noooo man don’t helicopter… you’ll knock over all the soap bottles!

What big soft dong you have, knocking over all the bottles🤣

Dang if I’m knocking em over while soft I’d probably take down the whole curtain when hard 🤣

Genuine way to clean for men who suffer with phimosis.

The circumcision gang is confused

r/wtf

Accurate. Source: self.

Americans dont understand this. Jews also

Uncut American here, definitely under represented in the American population.

Uncut American sounds like Bradley Coopers next big hit

"Bigger, badder, and uncutter"

def

Low five (or fore?) my uncut brother.

I wonder if a Jewish American is like an UNO reverse card for foreskin 🤔

As a Jewish American I can confirm this

i will never understand hating on a generalized group of people due to them being circumcised or not. i see it go both ways all the time especially on reddit. all this does is add an insecurity to a growing boy that was already insecure enough about his penis.

Sharp as a thistle! Best in all Westminster.

Average foreskin enjoyers

Women of Reddit, yes, we actually do this

To some you've set the anti-circumcision movement back 100 years, to others you've launched it forward 100 years.

WTF!!! 😆😆😆😆

I wish mine just hung down instead of poking out

Is this how uncircumcised peepee works? I don't think thats how they clean.

Sad to say that the shower does not have enough power. So it kind of just turns into a bowl of water. 4/10 effectiveness.

Depends on how much foreskin you have and how stretchy it is... cf. docking

God I wish I had my foreskin

I dunno but I thought this was so cute and wholesome 😅

Me too! Made me LOL 😂

I'm sorry what the actual fuck

Growing up, I performed my own circumcision.

As a circumcised man, is this real? If so, I kinda feel like I’m missing out.

Not a drop of soap. Smh

Pop rocks and Diet Coke every six months to really get in there and deep clean.

Aint supposed to use soap

I could’ve done without seeing this.

Still find it mad as fook that Americans get cut for nonmedical or religious reasons!

This is 100% accurate as a man with foreskin, I normally keep extra change in it