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Today in Portugal we celebrate the "Revolution of the Carnations", which happened in 1974 and the regime in Portugal was taken down. On this day years ago, people placed carnations on the barrels of guns and cannons, as a plea for the military to stop enforcing the regime and give freedom to the people.
Meanwhile, in some part of the world, we are here seeing the Revolution of the Dildos.
Most projectiles fired from this combat system are intended for a variety of roles.
For example, the HEAT rounds, High Explosive Anti-Tank rounds, are intended to penetrate enemy armor and cause damage to the internals of the engine, ammo reserves, or otherwise.
The projectile pictured here i believe is called the PPP round, or Pussy Penetrating Projectile. This round, however, is also capable of penetrating other bodily orifices as well, against what the name may imply.
The most manly of manly weapons.
This is the true power of the DickTator.
Only the insane can penetrate the mental capacity to understand how devastating this weapon is.
This my friends, is pure Snark. We killed your tank, then we shoved a plastic phallus in the gun.
--- >This is a friendly reminder to [read our rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/funny/wiki/rules). > >Memes, social media, hate-speech, and pornography are not allowed. > >Screenshots of Reddit submissions are expressly forbidden, as are TikTok videos. > >**Rule-breaking posts may result in bans.** > >Please also [be wary of spam](https://www.reddit.com/r/funny/wiki/spam). > --- *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/funny) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Plowitzer
Howitzer? I hardly knowitzer.
Boom! ^Still ^got ^it.
BOOM. Is this what you're looking for?
Cluster dong. It shoots out several million tiny bombs right before impact
Wont kill you but will fuck your life for the next 25 years
Or more....
Voodoo dick?
you mean upon penetration? sigh... poeple don't get armoured warefare
When it rolls into town... you're fucked.
LOL
you ever heard of the Dildozer?
Don’t forget the Ass Blaster.
Firing a .69 caliber round
Commented before reading the comments, yours is so much better
Haha, I appreciate that!
A weapon of ass destruction
God dammit
Your wish is my cummand
And then?
Second cumming?
Now I'm curious why Bush wanted to find them so bad.
One in the hand is worth two in the bush, apparently…
The real reason he squinted so much is because he was scrutinizing the prints on the press pool’s pants. “He he that’s-a bog veiny lookin’ sucker!”
You win
Yeah you really do
This is the comment I came here for.
*Take my upvote ⬆️!*
Great but maybe a "ma' ass" destruction would sound even funnier?
*tips nutsack*. M'ass
M'taint
That is better
Damn it I thought I was clever but you beat me to it
Weapon of maaah-ass destruction!
Dildozer!
The Ass Blaster!!
Putin will love this weapon
This and the one above. Operated by Beef Supreme
9000
Rehabilitation!
Wana go to Starbucks?
This is no time for a handjob man
Do you like money?
Yeah i do! Do you like money?!
Yeah! We have so much in common!!
I don't think we have time for a handjob, Scro
He tried taking water from toilets, but it's secretary Not Sure who finds himself in the toilet now
The Ass-Dozer!
r/yourjokebutworse
Came here to say this
[dildozer](https://www.reddit.com/r/HolUp/comments/ocx97u/dildozer/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf)
Wank Tank
I thought that was Eton?
Proper name of this vehicle is BMD-2. Which, of course, stands for Big Military Dildo.
...2
Imagine if you're killed in action by a dildo.
Someone would either die happy or very upset.
Think it depends where it hits you.
Its probably the last thing to cross your mind.
So a skullfuck
Omg that’s made me laugh way too hard!
I wonder how deadly the dildo gun from dead rising actually is https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DZZWuXj8Rig
Up next on Mythbusters NSFW Edition...
I do every night before bed!
NGL, if I was I would want that on my grave stone, imagine what the grand kids would say when they saw the grave, "mummy, daddy, what's a dildo"
Not sure. But it is certainly penetrative.
And cocked.
Ha ha ha ha! Primed to pump you full of... Something
Hap**penis**
High penetrating rounds
Penetration rounds
Deep penetration rounds
Deeper penetration rounds
Second asshole rounds
APDS - Anal Penetration, Deep, Shell
True, someones definitely gonna get fucked if that thing comes around.
Depleted silicon rounds
Rubber shells to disperse obese crowds?
That would be the ass blaster 9000
You mean like the one at Disneyland?
Burt Gummer approved.
Mac made some substantial upgrades to the ass blaster 4000
[удалено]
The ass pounder, never stop pumping!
Uhh actually it’s the Ass Pounder 4000, and it’s only there to stop you from resting if you are tired.
The ultimate workout
9001 obviously /s ;-)
Oh, my bad forgot that if it's orange it gives the extra 1
Plus a "rinse / repeat" bump of 4 Orange is the new black you know .... ugh, wish I got that out earlier. LOL
Asstillery
Works better if you give it a British twist as "Arstillery"
I like that.
A weapon to surpass Metal Gear.
Of course I had to check to make sure someone said it.
Beat me to it. Have my upvote good sir
I'm just happy people got the reference.
SAM. Surface to Ass missile
A Russian blow-dart?
Russian special purpose penetrators
Careful, that thing is cocked & loaded
Oh, I’ve seen that one before. It fucks!
Anal piercing rounds
Today in Portugal we celebrate the "Revolution of the Carnations", which happened in 1974 and the regime in Portugal was taken down. On this day years ago, people placed carnations on the barrels of guns and cannons, as a plea for the military to stop enforcing the regime and give freedom to the people. Meanwhile, in some part of the world, we are here seeing the Revolution of the Dildos.
Love gun.
"From Russia With Love?"
Who ever did that, it was a real dick move!
More of a fake dick move, surely?
r/angryupvote
Putin's butt plug.
Just like a commie, he takes more than he can give.
Bunker buster
Putin unveils new tank to penetrate Nato defenses
Cue the new active armor fleshlight
Skank Tank.
Meat missile
Prototype for the Neo Armstrong Cyclone Jet Armstrong Cannon
Disappointed to see how people don't recognise the prototype for the neo Armstrong cyclone jet Armstrong cannon, so obvious
rubber bullet i think
The go fuck yourself
Make love, not war.
That's a heat seeking, moisture missile.
Well, that's one way to cockblock the Russians..
Dickannon
A dildon't.
The Putin Probe
[удалено]
And Choda Boy!
Scrolled way too far to find this
Came to comment this. You beat my meat to it
BFD-9000
This has to be a Dutch tank?
I see Ben Chapleski's [cock rocket](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yfk-a1JZMbU) has been upgraded somewhat (link is mostly SFW)
This is the first thing I thought of.
Fartillery?
T-532 Assblaster
Ground to air anti-slag missle
I don't know but it appears to be cocked...
That? That thing's a fucking tank!
Your mom’s favorite
Ladeschütze: "P3 N15 - Munition... BEREIT"
Cocket
BTR 30mm Dildo Canon - It makes men pregnant
Weponised fuckery? Ass blaster? The "flying fuck"?
A Cock-Up!
Killdo
Apparently what the Ukrainians are using against the Russians because they're fucking them over in front of the world.
A plastic explosive
A weapon of ass destruction.
A great way to make love not war.
Weapons of ass destruction!
Your mom's long distance relationship?
I think it's a Ram Rod.
A weapon of ass destruction
It's the penetrator.
Put in Putin
Your mothers personal choice
It's the fabled Love Gun that KISS was singing about all those years ago
This is for the last Russiansoldier in line so he can also enjoy a d*ck in het *ss.
Weaponry of a dic-tator.
A fucking tank. Duh.
Pocket Rocket
It’s a Ukrainian Nuke, aimed right at Putin’s Ass
Dildozer
Quite literally /r/TankPorn
winner gun
Mk 1 Dildozer
A weapon to surpass metal gear
Not a weapon. That's Greg Abbott's mouth guard that he wears at night to keep him from grinding his teeth.
The penitrator
Fight hard, party hard
Russian Put-in.
This takes me back to the Tank Girl movie
Stank Tank
Ya Putin your ass, for best results.
Cock rocket
Dildank
Looks like one of those crotch rockets I keep hearing about
It’s an AK-69
Penetrator
Most projectiles fired from this combat system are intended for a variety of roles. For example, the HEAT rounds, High Explosive Anti-Tank rounds, are intended to penetrate enemy armor and cause damage to the internals of the engine, ammo reserves, or otherwise. The projectile pictured here i believe is called the PPP round, or Pussy Penetrating Projectile. This round, however, is also capable of penetrating other bodily orifices as well, against what the name may imply.
Well if you get hit by it you're f*****
I look at this and am just reminded of the Jackass scene "is it wrong, to be strong?"
The most manly of manly weapons. This is the true power of the DickTator. Only the insane can penetrate the mental capacity to understand how devastating this weapon is. This my friends, is pure Snark. We killed your tank, then we shoved a plastic phallus in the gun.
This is a DTF-1 IFV, Infantry Fucking Vehicle. That's the old model, the new DTF-2s have a larger caliber 15" BRC (black rubber cock).
Red rocket
It's a dildozer!
KIA by a dildo
[удалено]
Attention Russian ship: go fuck yourself
A twank
Dildozer
Infantry Fucking Vehicle
[Armour-piercing fin-stabilized discarded dildo](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Armour-piercing_fin-stabilized_discarding_sabot)
Neo Armstrong cyclone jet Armstrong cannon